REMOTE
by Link and Luigi
Summary: Momo fell asleep in class one day. And when he woke up, he found that he was suddenly on a pirate ship, and thus the hunt for the rest across various other Universes begins. It doesn't look like there will be any tennis today either.
1. REMOTE

REMOTE

Channel 1- The Remote Control

Momo fell asleep in class one day. And when he woke up, he found that he was suddenly on a pirate ship.

He didn't realize right away that it was a pirate ship, and the feeling of the boat rocking back and forth on the waves made it difficult for him to stand. When he finally did reach his feet, he slowly moved to the railing and looked down, discovering that there was a ship below him, and massive black sails behind him.

He was dressed entirely, fully decked out in the complete pirate garb. He stood there looking ever so quizzical, before finally concluding that he was having a crazy dream.

After all, how could he possibly trust himself enough to jump out of the crow's nest and onto the ropes that held the sails and descend without even a second thought?

Oddly enough, there was no one else around the ship. He snapped his fingers awkwardly as he wandered around. Just then, the door to the room that was obviously the Captain's Quarters slammed open, causing Momo to jump about six feet into the air, and then draw his sword as he turned around.

"Don't point your weapon at the captain." Said the person standing before him as he used his own sword to knock Momo's out of his hand.

Momo paused for a second and then looked back at this self proclaimed captain.

"…Inui?" Momo said.

Sure enough, it was Inui standing before him. Except he didn't quite look like Inui normally looks. He had on a big hat and was dressed in full pirate garb, but his clothing looked more expensive than Momo's. In addition, Inui also had a patch, but that wasn't about to stop him from wearing the same glasses.

"Come in," Inui ordered, grabbing Momo's arm and pulling him inside the captain's quarters.

Momo stood in the middle of the floor like a fool child as Inui sat down at a desk that had a map and a compass on it, among other things.

"Yeah?" Momo said.

"Don't you have any questions for me?" Inui asked.

"Uh…not really." Momo shrugged.

Inui raised an eyebrow. "Are you saying that you have NO questions whatsoever?" he clarified.

"About what?" Momo said.

"Hm…" Inui rubbed his chin. "Perhaps something along the line of… what's going on?"

"Oh." Said Momo with a shrug. "I guess."

"Do you mean to tell me that you are NOT wondering why we are on a pirate ship and dressed this way?" Inui said, slowly standing.

"Well…I sorta just figured it was a dream." Momo answered. "Why? Is it not?"

"No." Inui picked something up off the desk. "It is NOT a dream."

"All right." Said Momo. "In that case… why are we suddenly pirates?"

"It's this." Inui said.

He showed Momo something that looked remarkably like a remote control, except it had a little screen on the surface. Momo went to take it out of his hand, but Inui snatched it back and protected it.

"Don't touch it." Inui ordered.

"What does that have to do with it?" Momo asked.

"Well," said Inui. "I was conducting an experiment in which I would make the most superior television remote control of all time. But something went wrong. Instead of changing the channel on my television, it somehow changed the universe I was currently residing in."

Momo blinked a few times.

"We're in an alternate universe." Inui said. "In which we're pirates."

"I gathered that much." Momo said.

"And as of right now, I don't know how to bring us back to our original universe." Inui said, sitting back down and taking off his big captain's hat.

"I have a few questions now." Momo admitted.

"What are they?" Inui said.

"First off…why am _I _here if you were just conducting an experiment?" Momo began.

"I don't know." Inui answered. But then he held up the remote to show a big number '29' on it. "But before coming in contact with you, this number was a 30."

"So there are twenty-nine other people that you transported to this pirate world?" Momo said.

"No." Inui said. "Those twenty-nine other people were scattered across various alternate universes."

Momo stood there silently.

"That's a pickle." He said.

"Yes." Said Inui. "I believe our priority is to get back to our own universe and then find the whereabouts of the rest of the innocent people who might have accidentally been involved in this experiment."

"I have another question." Momo said.

"It is…?" Inui led.

"Why are you the captain and I'm just some random pirate?" Momo said.

"I don't know." Said Inui. "It's probably random."

"What else does that screen show you?" Momo ran to Inui and looked over his shoulder.

"It says that it is necessary for us to find some buried treasure." Inui answered, showing him the screen that, sure enough, instructed them to find some buried treasure.

Momo clapped enthusiastically. "That's it!" he exclaimed. "We have to find the buried treasure and then we get to go back home!"

Inui stared at Momo. "I figured that out like a whole minute ago." Inui said, shaking his head as if he were disappointed.

"Oh." Said Momo, looking dejected.

"And, it seems as though this map will be quite useful." Inui put the remote in his pocket and stood up once again, walking around the table. "There is a circled destination right here, and it appears as though our ship is quite close by."

"Maybe we were on our way to the treasure." Momo tried.

"I figured that out way before you." Inui said.

Momo frowned. "You know, I think we should work together instead of competing with each other." He advised.

"Sure." Said Inui, looking back at the map. "But the most peculiar thing about this map is that I know exactly how to read it, even though I have never seen one like it before in my life."

"Yeah…" said Momo. "I think I know what you mean. I climbed down the rigging of the ship really easily, even though I've never done that kind of stuff before. And I knew how to hold that sword!"

"Well I just don't know what to think about that." Said Inui.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door.

Inui and Momo both looked at the door, then at each other and then back at the door.

"Maybe if we ignore him, he'll go away." Momo tried, but Inui gave an exasperated sigh and marched over to the door, opening it up to be faced with a vile drunken pirate.

Both he and Momo drew back and made the "EW!" sound, especially since he smelled so rancid, but the pirate flunky just belched, scratched himself in a few inappropriate places and looked totally unfazed by their reactions.

"Cap'n!" said the pirate flunky.

Inui and Momo looked at each other again, then Momo pushed Inui forward.

Inui adjusted his hat, and tried to look pleasant, which probably wasn't the right appearance for him to go for on a pirate ship. "…Yes?" he said. "That's me."

"The crew 'n' me been wondren'…" the pirate flunky went on. "When be we shovin' ashore?"

Inui only looked at the pirate like he had the plague, and surely that wasn't terribly far off from whatever diseases he probably was carrying.

"…Er…when we…reach the shore?" Inui suggested, checking back at Momo OBVIOUSLY didn't know.

The pirate only stared at Inui.

"Cap'n, we been at shore since the very beginnin's o' mornin'." Said the pirate in the way only pirates can.

Inui was still disgusted with the pirate's mere presence, so he only stood there looking like he wanted to barf, as Momo went over to the window and peered out.

"What do you know? Land isn't that far away." Momo said. And then he stood up straight. "Hey! And I know why we can't just sail the boat right up to the shore! Isn't that weird?"

"Yes…er…very weird." Inui said to Momo and then he turned back to his pirate flunky who was waiting ever so patiently. "You," he said. "Tell the crew that I plan on going to shore with my companion here…" He gestured vaguely in Momo's direction. "…And everyone else should work together to keep the ship in tip top shape for when I return."

The pirate flunky may have been slightly confused, but Inui shooed him out the door and slammed it behind him.

"Well that's convenient." Momo said as Inui turned around.

"Find something that looks like a treasure map." Inui ordered as he started looking around the room, making somewhat of a mess.

"I just had a thought, Inui," Momo said as he opened some drawers and sifted through them.

"What's that?" Inui asked.

"Well…" Momo started. "I mean, how are we going to be able to recognize people who got transported to different universes? What if we don't know who they are? For all we know, there could be more people in this universe."

"It's easy," Inui said. "Just keep your eye out for someone who appears out of place."

He lifted the large map off the table and discovered a smaller one.

"This appears correct." Said Inui as he gave it a once over. He showed Momo, and then pointed at the large red 'X' in the middle of it.

"The X marks the spot." Said Momo.

"I know." Said Inui with a slight glare.

The two of them, as inconspicuously as possible, ran outside the captain's quarters and jumped in the boat that the rest of the crew had apparently already set up for them. They lowered down into the water with their treasure map and their remote control.


	2. The Treasure Hunt

Channel 2- The Treasure Hunt

Once their tiny boat hit the water, the two of them were once again staring at each other.

"Now we have to row." Said Momo, looking at the oars with an expression of utter distain.

"You have to row." Said Inui, leaning back and pulling out the remote control. "I'm going to try to figure out anything else I can about this thing."

"Why can't you do that later?" Momo said as he begrudgingly took hold of both the oars. "If you help me row, we'll get there faster."

"I'm the captain." Inui said in a petty fashion as he buried himself in his work.

Momo grumbled and started rowing. He couldn't argue all that much, considering Inui was a whole year older than he was. Or at least in a grade higher than him.

When they were about halfway to the island, Inui set down his remote and lifted up the treasure map.

"I hope this isn't TOO convoluted." Inui said, looking totally relaxed.

Momo set the oars down and panted like a dog. "I can't row the rest of the way!" he declared.

Inui looked up and adjusted his glasses. "What did you just say?" he said.

"I'm exhausted!" Momo collapsed backwards and remained that way.

Inui only stared at him. "It's important that we do this quickly." He said. "Everyone else doesn't have the luxury of having me around to explain everything to them."

"Inui, this is all your fault that we're all here so don't try to guilt trip ME into rowing anymore!" Momo said. "You have to help too!"

"Very well." Said Inui, pocketing both the map and the remote.

The two of them began rowing together, and it would be a lie if I said they quickly reached the island. It took them quite a while, since they had to rest often and for long periods of time.

And they actually didn't really reach the island until it was starting to get dark.

"We have to row all the way up to the shore because I don't want to have to walk around with the bottom of my pants soaking wet and inevitably being covered in sand." Inui told Momo.

"And you call yourself a pirate!" said Momo.

"No, no I don't." said Inui.

"You're dressed like one." Momo pointed out. "And anybody who's anybody knows that pirates like the feeling of gross sandy pant legs."

When they were ALMOST at the shore, Momo jumped into the water so his pants got wet from about his knees down. He then pulled the boat ashore because Inui refused to get out, and Inui stepped out being completely dry.

The two trudged across the sandy beach, and by the time they reached the forest area, Momo was already complaining about how uncomfortable he was.

"I TOLD you." Inui said, unrolling the treasure map and gazing upon its beauty and wonder.

Momo looked off into the distance back out to where the boat was. "I can't believe we rowed all the way here!" he exclaimed, sounding half bewildered and half proud.

Inui took a moment to look at their accomplishment well.

"Well, I suppose we did do that." He agreed. "It was good conditioning for future tennis matches."

"I never thought of that!" said Momo. "Man, I should have rowed the whole way! What was I thinking?"

"Hm…well, I think it's important we continue our search for this treasure." Inui said as he began tromping through the forest.

"Yeah, I guess…" Momo said as he followed Inui.

Both looked like they were lacking enthusiasm as they searched and tried their best to follow the map.

"Inui, I had another thought." Momo said as Inui pulled back a branch so Momo could walk by.

The two of them stopped and Inui waited.

"Well?" Inui asked.

"What if, when we find this treasure, we don't end up going home?" Momo asked. "I mean…what if we're stuck here forever and your weird remote control is just trying to make us find treasure for some reason?"

"That is highly unlikely." Inui said as he let go of the branch and it smacked Momo in the face.

"Hey!" said Momo, pushing the branch out of the way and chasing after Inui. "But have you considered that as a possibility?"

"It's unnecessary to consider it." Inui concluded.

"But WHAT IF—" Momo began but Inui just told Momo to talk to the hand.

They continued searching high and low, following the land marks the best they could. But it was getting very difficult, especially in the dead of night.

"Well, do you suppose that right there is the rock that looks like a skull?" Momo asked, pointing at a rock that didn't look like a skull.

"No." said Inui, looking annoyed.

"Why does there always have to be a rock that looks like a skull in pirate stories?" Momo said, but the question was mostly just to himself. "It seems kind of cliché, don't you think?"

"Kind of." Inui said as they reached the edge of a cliff overlooking the vast ocean.

Momo looked perplexed with their current situation. Inui looked back and forth from the map to the view.

"What is this?" Momo said with a sigh.

"The other side of the island." Inui answered.

Momo groaned and sat down. "We went by the rock that looks like a skull!" he whined. Then he looked at his hands. "And you know what I just realized? We don't have shovels!"

"We truly are poor pirates." Inui concluded.

"So what now?" Momo asked. "Do we head back the other way? All we have to do is follow the rocks that sort of look like skulls until we find one that looks enough like a skull to suit your standards."

"This is no fault of mine." Said Inui. "Don't try to pin this on me."

"You're the one who was always like, 'Oh no, no. That is certainly not the rock that looks like a skull'." Said Momo, crossing his arms. "We passed over plenty of perfectly fine skull shaped rocks."

"Well if you hadn't pointed out every single rock that we passed and claimed it looked liked a skull then I wouldn't have become numb to rocks and therefore I would have been able to eventually find a rock that looked like a skull."

"So are you saying it's MY fault?" Momo demanded angrily.

"Perhaps it is a combined fault." Inui concluded. "Well, let us continue back. Now that I've seen how much time it took us to get from one side of the island to the other, it's easy to estimate how long we have to walk until we reach the middle, where that X is."

Momo looked at the map, but Inui rolled it up before he could see.

"Let's go." He commanded.

Momo reluctantly followed Inui AGAIN.

They went back into the forest area and found that it was now totally pitch dark outside, which bummed them out.

Suddenly, after quite some time, Inui stopped walking in front of a large cave.

"This should do it." He said, sitting down.

"This should do it?" Momo repeated.

"This is about where the skull shaped rock should be." Inui said.

Momo peered at his surroundings. "How can you tell?" he asked. "I can't see a thing!"

"We'll have to wait until morning." Inui said.

"What?" demanded Momo. "Sleep on the ground?"

"Why not?" said Inui as he took off his jacket and bunched it up for a tolerable pillow. "Didn't you claim to have a rugged training in the mountains experience? It shouldn't be too far off from that."

"You're right." Said Momo, sitting down as well. "We'll have to rough it."

The two lied down and stayed like that in silence for a long time.

"Momo." Inui sat up after a while had passed.

"Inui?" Momo sat up as well.

"Yeah…I didn't think so." Inui stood up and put his jacket back on, and Momo followed suit.

"There's no way I'm going to be able to fall asleep right now." Momo said.

"Of course not." Said Inui. "We were foolish to even bother."

"Now let's find that rock that looks like a skull!" said Momo.

The two of them scoured the area, combing every inch of it. Finally, they met back up at the middle and shook their heads, having discovered no such rock.

"Are you sure we're supposed to be finding a ROCK that looks like a skull?" said Momo.

"I assumed that perhaps I misinterpreted the picture and I have been keeping my eyes open for anything in particular that looks like a skull." Inui reported.

"Well what if we're supposed to be finding a REAL skull?" Momo said, a slight sparkle forming in his eye.

Inui stood there, almost as if he expected Momo to exclaim, "JAYKAY!" but he did no such thing. "Of course I was looking for real skulls as well." Inui answered finally.

"Oh…well, I've really only been looking for rocks…" Momo admitted.

"That's all right." Said Inui. "I figured you would have only been looking for rocks. That's why I combed over the areas you searched already."

"Why didn't you just tell me to look for other things too?" Momo said angrily.

"Because." Said Inui.

And that was it.

Momo leaned up against a tree. "We're really failing at this." He concluded.

"Yes we are." Inui said.

"This is just how it is!" said Momo. "There is nothing here in the shape of a skull! I bet somebody already found the treasure first!"

"Don't give up just yet." Said Inui. "We are at a disadvantage because we don't have daylight. When the sun rises in a couple of hours, we'll look around again and hopefully have more success."

"I don't feel like waiting that long…" Momo complained. "Maybe we're just in the wrong spot."

"We are not in the wrong spot." Inui sounded rather confident. "Did you check in that cave?"

"Of course I checked in the stupid cave." Said Momo. "You checked in the cave too, didn't you?"

"Yes, I checked in the cave." Inui said.

Their endless and pointless bickering continued until the sun started rising.

Momo was just about to make another very compelling argument, when he looked over Inui's shoulder at the sun. His mouth gaping open, he pointed at the large cave.

Inui turned around to look, and discovered that their large cave probably wasn't really a cave at all. It was just a gigantic rock, and the 'cave' that they had been standing outside of all night was just the void of the mouth.

"Here it is!" Momo said. "The rock shaped like a skull!"

"Hm…this map isn't drawn to scale…" Inui said, opening up the treasure map and peering at it.

"Forget the map!" said Momo. "The rock is here! That means we have to dig around here somewhere!"

"No, wait." Said Inui as Momo dove onto the ground and started digging in a random spot. Inui grabbed his collar and pulled him back to his feet. "We have to make three hundred paces away from the rock towards the setting sun."

"So that's…over…there?" Momo pointed in random direction.

Inui took a deep breath. "Just follow me." Inui ordered.

He stood right up next to the rock and started pacing while counting his steps.

"Those steps are too big!" Momo said. "What if the guy who made this map was shorter than you?"

"Be quiet, Momo." Inui said as he concentrated on his steps.

Momo just walked next to him, looking around for some buried treasure.

"After the three hundred paces, there should be somewhat of a drop." Inui said, observing the map. "296, 297, 298, 299, 300."

He came to a stop and looked disappointed.

"Well?" said Momo. "So much for that!"

He put his hands on his hips and started wandering around the area. Then, abruptly, he stepped into a large hole and dropped to the center of the earth. But not really that far, though it was a significant drop.

Surely in reality, such a drop would break both his legs, but for our purposes, we'll just say that he was FINE. And as Inui ran over to see what had happened, he only peered down the hole to see Momo getting up and brushing himself off, perfectly okay after an event that should have, at the very least, gravely wounded him.

"Are you all right?" Inui called.

"Yeah, I'm fine…" Momo said, looking around. "Whoa, this is a little underground cave like thing!"

"I have no more information on the map, so I can only assume that the treasure is somewhere down there." Inui said.

"I'll take a look around!" Momo said.

Inui took a quick look around, and then found a convenient vine that happened to be very long and quite durable. He tied it around a tree and dropped it into the hole and then proceeded to climb down, descending into the abyss as well. He hopped off the vine and approached Momo who appeared to be entranced by whatever he had found.

"It's…a treasure chest!" Momo said, dropping to his knees and marveling at the chest that sat before him.

"The lock looks old." Inui said, picking up a rock and handing it to Momo. "You shouldn't have trouble breaking it."

Momo gladly took the rock and started to smash at the chest like there was no tomorrow. He was having more trouble than he expected, but luckily, the lock finally crumbled.

"All right…here's hoping that this gets us out of here." Momo said, putting his hands on the top.

Slowly, he lifted the lid.

The two of them were engulfed in light that came from the inside. They watched in amazement, and then Inui heard the remote control in his pocket start to beep. He pulled it out and the screen dictated, "Complete".

He pressed the channel changing button, and suddenly everything turned completely white.

When their eyes came back into focus, they found they were now in the middle of what looked like a courtyard.

The treasure was gone.

Momo slowly got to his feet and Inui scanned the area.

"Where are we?" Momo said. "This isn't home."

"I don't know." Inui responded. He looked down and frowned disappointedly, then took a look at Momo. "We're still dressed as pirates."

"What…?" Momo whined, looking at himself.

"Who's that over there?"

The two of them spun around just as a man mounted on a decorated and armored horse trotted up to them.

"Inui? Momo?" the man sounded like he was surprised.

He was dressed in full armor, complete with a shield and sword hanging by his side, with a helmet over his head that covered his face. Inui and Momo waited for him to reveal more information, and Inui looked at the remote control screen as the 29 turned into a 28.

"Oh!" he laughed as he reached up and took the helmet off. "It's me! Taka!"

Sure enough. There he was. It was Taka.

"Taka?" they both said.

"I am so glad to see you guys." Said Taka as he dropped the helmet on the grass and hopped off his horse. "Ever since yesterday afternoon, I've been in this weird place. You guys know anything?"

"As a matter of fact, I know quite a bit." Inui replied.


	3. Coming Out

Channel 3- Coming Out

"I see." Taka nodded as the three of them lounged in the courtyard. "So that's how it is. Well, that's complicated!"

"Yeah, we figured we'd just be taken home after we completed our tasks, but instead we were just taken here!" said Momo. "To…where is here?" He looked at Inui.

Inui looked at Taka.

"Ahh…well, if you guys were at Pirate Universe, I guess I'm in Knight Universe." Taka said with a smile.

"That makes sense." Inui said, taking the remote control and wandering off, peering at it and pressing buttons.

"So, how has Knight Universe been going?" Momo asked eagerly.

"It's interesting." Taka shrugged. Then he paused, almost as if he had just remembered something that was definitely something he felt silly about forgetting until just then. "Why, just this morning, I was actually knighted."

"You were knighted?" Momo gasped. "Wow! That's amazing!"

"Yeah!" said Taka, looking excited. "Yesterday, when I first got here, I suddenly appeared on this horse here…I didn't even know I knew how to ride a horse! And then this man comes up to me and he tells me that I am to be knighted by the king tomorrow morning."

"By the king?" said Momo, looking like he was going to swoon.

"Sure enough," Taka went on. "I show up and there's the king and the queen and his daughter and…I'm knighted! Even though I'm not sure what I did, I feel very proud of myself."

"Well…" Momo said. "Inui and I rowed really far."

Momo kicked the ground, looking defeated.

"Who am I kidding?" he said. "Inui got to be the captain of the ship, and you get to be a knight. I suck."

"Don't worry, Momo." Said Taka. "I'm sure it doesn't matter all that much."

"This is ridiculous." Said Inui as he walked over.

"What is?" Taka and Momo both asked.

"Remember how this remote told us exactly what we had to do to leave the Pirate Universe?" Inui said, and Momo nodded. "Well, I am getting no response whatsoever on what our mission is to leave this Universe."

"Maybe if we give it time, it'll show up eventually." Taka said optimistically.

"Hopefully." Inui said. "Though, our mission appeared immediately. I would hate to think there is nothing we can do to leave this Universe."

Momo let out a loud yawn. "I am tired of worrying…" he said. "And I'm actually just tired. We stayed up all night last night and plus, we rowed all that way, even though I rowed the most."

"I bet I could get you guys rooms at the castle." Taka said.

"In the castle?" Momo gaped.

"Well, not in the actual castle." Taka admitted. "But sort of this little place I stay at that's on the other side of the courtyard. I'm pretty sure it's my home, otherwise it would be pretty awkward if wasn't…"

Taka looked awkward.

"So…you guys want to go?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm tired." Momo said.

"There's nothing we can do until we find out what our mission is." Inui said. "So we might as well get some sleep."

"All right, I'll show you the way." Taka said, standing up and grabbing the reins to his horse.

They stared walking and Inui continued to fiddle with his remote.

"So is anyone else here?" Momo asked.

"Anyone else?" Taka repeated quizzically.

"Yeah, I mean anyone else here that's not supposed to be." Momo said.

"Oh." Said Taka. "Well, no. Before you two showed up, it was just me."

"I hope that is accurate." Inui said.

"What do you mean?" Taka questioned.

"Because if it turns out that someone else is here and we end up completing the task while he or she is not around then he or she might end up being stuck here forever." Inui replied.

"That could be a disaster." Taka said.

"That's assuming that the three of us can even leave." Momo pointed out. "Keep in mind that that thing of yours hasn't told us what we have to do to leave here in the first place."

"I'm sure something positive will turn up." Taka said, STILL trying to look at the glass half full.

They finally reached a row of stone houses that all looked identical; almost like ultra mini castles all lined up next to each other. Taka tied the horse to a pole that was set up outside and then led his two human companions inside.

However, whence they entered, they found that there was already someone inside.

"A message for the knight of this house—oh!"

Eiji gasped with delight when he saw Taka, Momo and Inui standing there.

"What a relief to see a familiar face!" he exclaimed, running over to them and forcing a big group hug on them.

"Eiji, you're here as well." Inui stated the obvious as he looked at his remote control as the number once again descended, except now it was a mere 27.

"Yeah!" said Eiji. "I've been here for a while, actually. Almost a whole day! And I'm so glad that it wasn't just a coincidence that the knight I got assigned to had the name Sir Takashi."

"Wait, the knight you got assigned to?" Taka repeated.

"Oh yeah!" said Eiji. "Well, I'm a squire. YOUR squire, apparently. Hey, why are you two dressed as pirates?"

"Eiji, I don't think you've fully grasped the situation." Inui said. "Let me explain it to you."

"I was actually just about to ask you to do that for me!" Eiji said.

And so Inui explained what was going on to Eiji, and Eiji seemed to accept it pretty easily.

"So all we have to do is wait for that remote control to tell us what to do and then we do it and then we go home?" Eiji clarified.

"Well, we're not to sure about the going home part." Momo said.

"So we do what the controller tells us to do and then we…uh… then something or other happens?" Eiji revised.

"Yes, that seems about right." Inui said.

"Wow…what a burden…" Eiji sighed. "And we haven't gotten the message yet…looks like all we can do is wait."

Then he hit his fist into his palm.

"I almost forgot the message I was supposed to deliver to you, Sir Taka!" he said, reaching into his pocket.

"You don't have to call me Sir." Taka assured him.

"Here you go!" Eiji handed him a scroll, but then he quickly swiped it back. "But maybe it's my job to read it to you! Let me do it!"

"You don't have to take it seriously, Eiji." Taka said, looking embarrassed.

Eiji unrolled the scroll and assured Taka that everything was A-OK. He read it to himself before he read it out loud, however. Then he gasped out loud. Then shook his head, then laughed, then looked super serious as he continued to read.

"Give me that!" said Momo, snatching it from Eiji and then reading it over himself. "Taka, what exactly did you do to make them love you so much?"

"What do you mean?" Taka said.

"It says you're invited to the king's daughter's Coming Out." Momo answered.

"Coming Out?" said Taka. "What does that mean?"

"It's like a ball in which a young lady shows herself off and lets everyone know that she is of age to be married." Inui replied. "It is an old tradition that would take place in such a world as this."

"That was nice of the king to invite me." Said Taka with a pleased nod.

"No, Taka." Said Momo. "You're invited… AS A SUITOR."

"As a…suitor?" Taka said, looking like he was going to have a heart attack. "Oh no! I just won't go, that's all…"

"You can't not go!" said Eiji. "That would be an insult to the king! And I bet he would think that I just didn't deliver it! And besides, it says here that I'm invited too and I want to go…"

"But I don't want to be a suitor!" Taka whined.

"Then just make yourself unappealing to the princess." Inui advised.

"When is this Coming Out?" Taka fretted, grabbing the scroll and looking it over. "Tomorrow night! I can't do that! I don't know anything about this kind of stuff! I'd be miserable!"

"Which is perfect, because then you won't be chosen as a suitor." Said Inui. "But Eiji is right. If you do not attend then it would likely insult the king and his daughter, and there's no telling what he would do, but surely you would be punished severely."

"Besides, it's not like we have our mission yet so we can't leave." Momo said with an exasperated sigh as he threw himself on the bed that was tucked in the corner.

"But I'll mess up." Said Taka. "And then everyone will find out that we don't belong in this Universe."

"You'll be fine, Taka!" said Eiji. "I'll make sure of it!"

"We can bide our time and find out what's the matter with this thing." Inui said, shaking the remote and listening to it as if that would solve anything, but at this point he was desperate.

"We should RSVP ASAP!" said Eiji, grabbing Taka's arm and pulling him towards the door.

"But I don't want to RSVP!" Taka griped as Eiji slammed the door behind them as they left.

"Come on, hop up!" Eiji said, putting his hands out while crouching beside Taka's horse.

"Eiji, you don't have to do all this." Taka said. "I'm perfectly capable of getting on the horse on my own."

"But I want to help!" said Eiji. "I'm your squire!"

Taka didn't want to disappoint Eiji, so he stepped on his hand and swung his leg around the horse, now mounted. Eiji untied the horse from the pole and started pulling him along.

Taka just sat there looking awkward and Eiji skipped in front of him, almost as if he did this sort of thing all the time.


	4. An Encounter

Channel 4- An Encounter

Taka and Eiji returned to their little house place after a very long and grueling day of having to do various things around the castle and for the king. It was quite tedious and quite annoying, but both tried to remain as positive as possible because that's just the kind of people they are.

Taka hopped off the horse and Eiji tied it to the pole and just as they were about to enter the house, the door slammed open and Inui was standing there. He was pointing at the remote and looking quite dramatic.

"Rescue the princess." He said.

"What?" Eiji and Taka both said.

"That's the mission." He explained as he showed them the screen a little more closely so they could actually see it. "The thing we have to do before we are able to leave is that we have to rescue the princess."

"Rescue the princess from what?" Eiji questioned. "We just saw her. She isn't in any danger."

"She's so busy with getting ready for her Coming Out that she doesn't have any time to be in danger."

"I don't know." Said Inui. "There are no specifications or details here. All it says is 'rescue the princess'. So we have to rescue her and then we can leave."

"I suppose we can check to see if she's in any danger." Taka suggested. "Let me just get changed into something less annoying and heavy!"

Taka went into the house and passed by Momo who was just lying on the bed snoring.

After he got changed into something less annoying and heavy, but still quite knightly, he exited the house again where Eiji and Inui were waiting.

"What about Momo?" he asked.

"He's sleeping." Inui said. "We'll just leave him here."

"He won't be mad?" Taka said.

"You shouldn't care." Said Inui. "This is all about rescuing the princess so you can leave before you have to marry her."

"I don't have to marry her!" Taka said.

"You MIGHT have to!" Eiji pointed out.

"Oh no…" Taka said woefully.

"Let's go check up on the princess now." Said Inui. "Do you know where her room is?"

"I have an idea." Taka answered. "But only because we spent all day wandering around the castle."

"I bet if we found the biggest most romantic looking balcony then we'd find the princess's room!" said Eiji.

"I'll go with that." Said Inui.

"Fine…" Taka frowned.

They went through the courtyard and, ironically enough, there was a large, romantic balcony overlooking said courtyard. However, it was far too high up for anyone to peek in.

"Look, we can climb up that way." Said Eiji, pointing at the vines that were growing up the side of the castle.

"What, and peek in her window?" Taka said, sounding appalled.

"We have to rescue her, remember?" Eiji said, running over to the vines and giving them a pull to make sure they would support him.

"No way!" said Taka as he went over and wrenched Eiji away from the castle walls. "What if she's changing? You can't just peek in her window like that!"

"We have to." Said Inui. "It's essential so we can leave."

"Maybe she's not in trouble just yet!" Taka said, sounding like he was pleading.

"Who's that out there?"

The three of them froze and listened to the female voice approaching directly above them, accompanied by a single set of footsteps.

They all dodged underneath the balcony so she wouldn't be able to see them.

"Hello?" she called, leaning over the balcony. "I heard someone out here!"

"Sh! No! Sh! Be quiet! Sh!"

The three of them were hissing at each other.

"I hear you under the balcony!" she said, leaning over further. "I'm going to call the guards if I have to!"

Finally, Inui grabbed Taka and booted him out into the open. He stumbled and turned around to yell at Inui and Eiji only to realize that he had come into view of the princess.

"Um…hey…" said Taka, waving awkwardly.

"Oh!" she exclaimed. "Sir Takashi! You have come to my balcony just as the sun is setting…"

She looked at him lovingly, as if waiting for him to say something.

"So yeah!" said Taka. "I was uh…just passing through and making sure that… uh… there was no uh… trouble and uh…"

He looked at Eiji who was covering his mouth and trying to stifle his laughter, and at Inui who he could tell was laughing just as hard as Eiji, but just doing a better job at hiding it.

"So yeah, there's no trouble so I'll just be heading out, bye!" said Taka as he turned around to leave.

"Wait!" the princess called.

Taka winced and slowly faced her again. "Um…yes?"

"I look forward to seeing you tomorrow night." She said softly.

"Uh…yeah!" said Taka. "I'll be there! So uh…yeah! Catch you later!"

"Wait!" she called again.

Taka, once again, stopped in his tracks and waited for her to go on.

"Is it true?" she said. "The stories? The ones I've heard of you?"

"Uh…" Taka said slowly. "Well…yeah. Of course! If you mean the stories in which I did things, then yeah. I did those things. In the stories you heard, cause they're true."

"How wonderful…" she sighed, looking off at the sunset, then she looked back at Taka who was trying to tiptoe away. "My father wishes for me to marry a prince."

Taka waited a few seconds and then gave the thumbs up. "Father knows best, right?" he tried with a dorky laugh.

"Not exactly." The princess said, looking ever so pained in the heart. "I wish to marry for love!"

"Well you should follow your heart and everything will be okay!" said Taka.

"Oh Sir Takashi," said the princess. "You are so wise. And brave. And strong. And handsome."

"Um…well…thanks…" said Taka twiddling his fingers.

"Fare well, my wise knight!" she said as she dropped her dainty white handkerchief from the balcony. Taka watched it fall, but was incredibly distracted by Eiji and Inui who were both making fun of him in their own special ways. "I shall wait for the moment in time when we meet again."

"Uh…" Taka said, picking it up. "Ditto?"

With that, the princess disappeared back into her room.

Eiji nearly collapsed from laughter as he ran out and hugged Taka. "That was the best thing I have ever seen!" he said. "You win at life!"

"Sh." Said Inui as he came out as well. Taka pushed Eiji away and turned bright red. "We should leave now before she comes back."

"But don't we have to rescue her?" Taka said.

"From what?" Inui pointed out.

"Oh right…" Taka lowered his head.

The three of them started walking back across the courtyard, Eiji still chuckling about the encounter Taka had just had with the princess.

"Fare well my wise night!" he said, making his voice squeak. "She was completely smitten with you!"

"Eiji, stop it…" Taka said, looking BEYOND embarrassed. "You guys are the ones who pushed me out there without anything to say!"

"You could have said ANYTHING!" said Eiji. "She ate it all up. I don't think she needs to have her Coming Out ball. She probably already has her heart set on you and is going to tell her dad first thing in the morning!"

"Eiji, that's enough." Said Inui.

"Oh fine…" Eiji said. "But you guys are no fun!"

They made their way back to the little house, where Eiji simply couldn't wait at all to wake up Momo so he could have someone to laugh at Taka with.

"You guys went to see the princess and you didn't wake me up?" Momo sounded more devastated than he needed to.

"But you should have seen how funny it was!" laughed Eiji.

"I WOULD have seen if you guys had woken me up!" Momo pointed out.

"Oh right." Said Eiji.

"What did she look like?" Momo asked. "Was she pretty?"

"I didn't really see her." Eiji said. "Just ask Taka!"

Momo crossed his arms and looked angrily at the others.

Taka shook his head and tried to remain good-spirited about the whole mess.

"What are we going to do?" said Taka. "She's not in any danger, so how are we supposed to rescue her?"

"I am thinking up an idea as we speak." Inui said. "If she is not in danger, then we can create danger."

"How?" Eiji asked.

"All we have to do is set up a scenario in which the princess gets kidnapped, and then we rescue her." Inui answered.

"Not following." Momo said.

"Wait, I think I get it." Said Taka. "We kidnap her, and then rescue her from ourselves?"

"Precisely." Inui replied.

"But how are we going to pull that off?" said Eiji. "I don't know if taking her away from the castle and bringing her back would really qualify as kidnapping and rescuing."

"I know." Said Inui. "That is why we have to split up into two groups."

"What groups?" Momo asked.

He adjusted his glasses and looked around the room from each eager face to the next.

"I'm sure it is not out of the ordinary for a duo of pirates to kidnap a fair princess, and for a knight and his squire to return her to her father, the king." He said finally.

"Aha…" the other three said.


	5. The Rescue

Channel 5- The Rescue

"Everyone wake up! WAKE UP!"

Eiji was running around like a madman trying to get the other three to awaken. Inui got up first.

"What is it?" he said.

"It's incredible!" Eiji said. "There are princes and knights from all over the place showing up at the castle! I'm meeting so many other squires!"

Inui instinctively looked at a place where his watch would potentially be, only to be disappointed when he did not find one. "What time is it?" he asked.

"I don't know." Said Eiji. "I don't have a watch either."

"How long have you been up?" Inui questioned.

"Longer than you." Eiji said.

"Oh never mind." Said Inui as he turned around and woke up Momo and Taka.

"What, why do we have to get up now?" whined Momo.

"We have to put our plan into action." Inui said. "You and I have to kidnap the princess today before too many knights and princes get here."

"Why?" said Momo.

"Because the more knights and princes that are here, the better guarded the princess will be." Inui answered.

"Let's try to rescue her before her party starts." Taka said, rubbing his eyes tiredly. "I don't want her party to be ruined."

"Fair enough." Inui agreed.

"So what's the plan?" Eiji asked.

"Momo and I will scale that balcony of hers, grab her and get out of here as fast as we can." Inui replied. "You two will follow us, come riding up very valiantly, we'll have a very dramatic fight which will end in the pirates' deaths, and then you will whisk her away back to her party."

"That sounds easy enough." Said Eiji.

"It's easy to remember." Said Taka. "But there's a problem. She's going to fall in love with me even more after I rescue her from pirates."

"Don't flatter yourself!" said Momo bitterly.

"It doesn't matter." Said Inui. "Once I press the button on this remote, we'll be transported elsewhere, so if all goes according to plan then you won't even have to go to the Coming Out."

"Oh." Said Taka. "That IS a good plan!"

"But I wanted to go…aw man…" whined Eiji.

"Hurry and get dressed." Said Inui. "We have to do this quickly."

Everyone did as they were told because they all had a motivation for doing so. Of course, they all wanted to go home, but in addition to that Momo wanted to meet the princess, even if he was going to be kidnapping her, Taka wanted to be sure that he wouldn't have to go to this party, and Eiji didn't want to disappoint his knight!

When they were all set, Taka mounted his horse and they all made their journey back towards the princess's balcony.

Unfortunately, when they reached the balcony, they had to dive behind a giant rose bush because there was a prince standing there with a bouquet of flowers, obviously trying to court the princess.

"Princess!" he called. "I adore you!"

"Please," the princess said. "My heart belongs to another."

"That's you." Eiji whispered to Taka.

"Sh!" Taka hissed crossly.

"Princess, please, you haven't even given me a chance to court you." Said the prince.

"I do not wish to be courted by you." The princess said.

"Who is this prince who has stolen your love all for himself?" the prince inquired.

"He is the loyal and brave knight, Sir Takashi who lives yonder across the courtyard." The princess answered.

"Told you!" Eiji whispered to Taka.

"Stop!" Taka pleaded.

"Be quiet, both of you." Inui ordered.

"You believe this knight is more worthy of your love than I?" said the prince, sounding absolutely appalled. "I will show you that it is not so. I will duel him for your love."

"I would not recommend it." The princess said. "The stories I have heard of his bravery reinforce that you would not prevail."

"I care not." Said the prince. "I will do what I can to make you mine."

"It is your duel to lose." Said the princess as she turned her back to prince and left the balcony.

"Oh no!" said Taka, looking at the others. "I don't know how to duel!"

"It's all right!" said Eiji. "Once they kidnap the princess and you save her, you won't have to duel that douche bag OR go to the party!"

"Yeah…I guess so…" Taka said as he watched the prince depart, throwing the bouquet to the ground.

"Let's get this over with." Inui said, gesturing for Momo to follow him.

Taka and Eiji watched them go and then looked hopefully at each other.

Inui and Momo began scaling the vine covered walls.

"This is a lot harder than I thought it would be." Inui confessed as he nearly lost his footing and plummeted to his doom.

"Why couldn't _I _be the knight?" Momo was whining. "Taka could have been the pirate…"

Inui was the first to reach the railing of the balcony. He pulled himself over and then helped Momo up over the edge. They poked their heads in the window to see the princess sitting on her bed looking bored.

"She's even more beautiful up close…" Momo said, his eyes turning into pulsing hearts.

Inui slapped him across the face. "Focus." He said.

"Fine…" Momo said with a glare.

"All right, this is what we're doing." Said Inui. "We have to be very quiet. Sneak up, grab her and then get out of here."

"How are we going to carry her while we climb down the side of the wall?" Momo asked.

"Um…we'll manage." Inui said.

"That's not a good answer!" Momo fretted.

Then the princess looked up, having heard Momo's loud worrying. "Who's there?" she said, standing up.

"Forget about the sneaking up on her…just remember to play the part of the evil kidnapper." Said Inui as he pulled Momo out into the open.

The princess gasped. "Who are you?" she said.

"We are evil pirates here to kidnap you!" said Momo dramatically, but she fainted right after he uttered the word 'evil'.

Inui and Momo stared at her sprawled out on the floor for a few seconds and then they shrugged.

"That was easy enough." Inui said. "Your acting was very compelling, I suppose."

"Of course!" said Momo, adjusting his clothing proudly.

Momo slung the princess over his shoulder and started climbing down the side of the wall. Inui called to him not to drop her, and Momo yelled him that he was not going to drop her.

Needless to say, it was a very intelligent exchange.

When they reached the ground, they ran right over to where Taka and Eiji were still hiding.

"What are you doing?" Eiji said, trying to cover his face.

"Don't worry!" said Momo. "She fainted."

"You didn't hit her over the head with anything, did you?" said Taka, looking concerned.

"I JUST said that she fainted." Momo said, looking annoyed.

"Well, let's hurry this up." Said Inui. "Let's go a little way that way and wait for her to wake up, and then we'll have our duel."

Everyone agreed and they went into the forest and found a nice convenient clearing.

"I hope this plan works." Said Taka. "I really don't want to duel anyone… or marry anyone…"

"There is a lot riding on this plan." Inui said.

"Why did I have to come into THIS Universe?" Taka said, putting his head in his hands.

"I would have gladly traded with you!" Momo announced.

"I'm just glad you guys are here to help us out." Said Eiji. "Otherwise we never would have found out that that prince was going to challenge Taka to a duel. And we never would have had this awesome plan!"

"I'm creative in that aspect." Inui said, adjusting his glasses.

They all stared at him.

"So have you uh…checked under that patch?" Momo asked. "It's been bothering me. Do you really not have an eye?"

"Yeah…" Taka and Eiji agreed.

"I've already decided not to check." Inui declared. "I have no desire to know."

"We do…" the others said quietly.

"I think she's waking up." Said Momo, leaning over her.

Sure enough, she was.

"All right, quick!" said Eiji, standing up and gesturing everyone else to stand up as well.

When they didn't react fast enough for him, Eiji grabbed Taka's sword and put it underneath Inui's arm, and then booted Momo onto the ground. They looked at him confusedly just as the princess sat up looking wobbly.

"OH." Said the others.

"This is the end for me." Said Inui, putting his hand over the handle of the sword. "You have defeated me and my evil pirate lackey and rescued the princess, Sir Takashi."

"Yeah…and uh…don't you forget it!" said Taka, at a loss of anything else to say.

Then Inui collapsed to the ground in a performance that rivaled that of a performance that is just sort of okay.

Then there was silence as the princess only sat there staring at Taka.

"Sir Taka, you did it!" Eiji said as he ran over and did JAZZ HANDS! "You rescued the princess!"

"My hero!" the princess said, getting up and running over to Taka. "You rescued me from the evil pirates! How can I ever repay you?"

"Uh…" Taka started, looking around and hoping that something would happen. Like they would just get magically teleported to another Universe and he wouldn't be standing there looking awkward.

Eiji shrugged helplessly.

"Please, take me back to the castle," the princess said. "I am too frightened to go on my own!"

"Uh…"

But in the end, Taka ended up escorting the princess back to the castle, leaving Eiji standing there scratching his head.

As soon as the princess and Taka had departed, Inui and Momo sat up.

"Isn't something supposed to happen?" Eiji asked.

"Yeah." Said Momo. "Last time we completed our mission, this white light came out of nowhere and then suddenly we were here."

"We didn't complete the mission." Said Inui, taking out the remote. "When we found the buried treasure, the remote said 'Complete' and then we were transported here. The remote still is telling us to go and rescue the princess."

He showed everyone the screen, and all it said was 'Rescue the princess'.

"You know what this means, don't you?" said Inui.

"Yes!" said Eiji. "You guys got to hunt for buried treasure and I didn't? NOT FAIR!"

Inui looked at Eiji and then decided to disregard him entirely.

"Apparently, our staged kidnapping was not sufficient." Said Inui, addressing the two of them now. "Perhaps we must wait for the princess to be in real danger and then we must actually rescue her."

"You mean we have to LEGITIMATELY rescue her?" said Eiji. "What was wrong with our fake rescuing of her?"

"Probably because she wasn't in real danger." Said Inui. "Or any danger at all."

"What are we supposed to do while we're waiting for an opportunity to rescue her?" said Momo. "It could take weeks or months or even years before the princess is in real danger!"

"I couldn't tell you." Said Inui. "All I can say is that our plan obviously backfired."

"Now she has an even bigger crush on Taka." Momo said regrettably.

"If possible!" laughed Eiji.

"This is no laughing matter, Eiji." Said Inui.

"Why?" said Eiji. "I think it's funny."

"It was a little funny before when it was harmless." Said Inui.

"Looks like we're just going to have to keep jumping at every chance we can to rescue her." Said Momo.

"I can tell this isn't going to be as easy as finding buried treasure." Inui said.


	6. The Duel

Channel 6- The Duel

"I can't believe I'm going to this thing!" Taka whined as he and Eiji made their way through the castle to the large ball room along with many other suitors.

"Well, all you have to do is avoid the princess all night and you'll be fine!" Eiji said.

"Why aren't Momo and Inui coming?" Taka asked, looking around.

"They're going off to find out if anyone plans on kidnapping the princess." Eiji answered.

"Oh come on!" said Taka. "Like anyone is just going to tell them!"

"It's not like they were invited so they can't come anyway!" said Eiji as he waved hello to a life long friend he had made earlier in the day.

As it turned out, this particular life long friend he had made happened to be the servant/companion of that prince that they had all eavesdropped on earlier. So when the prince noticed his servant waving vigorously to Eiji, he also happened to notice Taka.

He took it upon himself to impose his presence on them.

"Ah," he said arrogantly. "Sir Takashi, I presume?"

Taka laughed nervously. "Uh…sure!"

"Surely your squire delivered your message to you." The prince went on.

Taka paused a moment, then he looked at Eiji crossly. Eiji shrugged, then apologized profusely, then reached into his pocket and handed Taka a scroll. Taka opened up the scroll and read it all over very quickly.

Then he looked up. "Um…what?" he tried, not fully understanding the flowery language that was being presented to him.

"To put it into easy terms for you knights," said the prince. "I challenge you to a duel."

Taka nodded. "Ah, that's right!" he looked back at the scroll. "Hmm…yes, I see it now! Right here, how could I have missed it?"

"I wish for it to be tomorrow at noon." Said the prince.

"Tomorrow at noon?" said Taka. "That's no good for me. How about some time next year?"

"Tomorrow at noon." The prince repeated.

"You got it." Said Taka, pouting.

"We shall duel for the princess's love." Said the prince.

"With all due respect, do you really think that she'll really love the person who wins when we fight each other?" Taka said.

The prince was just about to respond when a maid suddenly sprinted out to where all the lords and princes and knights were gathered.

"The princess has been kidnapped!" she wailed.

The entire crowd gasped.

As it happens, the king was sitting right there, and he stood up dramatically. "The man who brings my daughter back to me shall have her as his bride!" he announced.

There was a few second pause and then a mad rush for the door.

Taka was trampled, but he wasn't trying all that hard to get out the door and soon he was the only one left in the entire room, aside from Eiji.

"Come on, Taka!" said Eiji, trying to pull him along.

"Why?" said Taka. "I don't want to marry the princess!"

"But if one of these other guys rescues her then we won't get a chance to save her and then we'll never leave this Universe!" Eiji reminded him.

"Point taken!" Taka got to his feet and the two of them ran out of the castle. They were just in time to see all the other suitors taking off on their horses in different directions.

"There's so much competition!" complained Eiji. "We have to get to her first!"

"I knew I should have brought my horse!" said Taka. "Now we have to go all the way back to the house to get it!"

"Sor-ry!" said Eiji. "We're not that far away so I didn't think you'd need it! Besides, you have to go back to get your sword and stuff anyway!"

"Let's hurry!" said Taka as the two of them started running back to the house, but were suddenly grabbed by mysterious people in the shadows and pulled behind a bush.

"Don't worry, it's just us!" said Momo reassuringly.

"What is it?" said Taka. "We're in a hurry!"

"Momo and I were gathering data." Said Inui. "We know precisely where the kidnappers are headed."

"This way!" Momo said. "We brought some horses!"

"You did bring MY horse, didn't you?" said Taka with that face that was all like, "I have an emotional attachment to MY horse and I refuse to ride any other one."

"Well duh." Said Momo with that face that was all like, "I know you have an emotional attachment to your horse. Riding a different horse would be like using a different tennis racket. And that just doesn't work for anyone except Fuji, but he's an exception because he's creepy."

And a shiver ran down everyone's spin in remembrance of Fuji's creepiness.

"Well, let's go!" said Taka as he got up on his horse. His horse was, of course, the most beautiful of all the others since it was armored and decorated and totally white. The other two were brown and only had saddles.

"Two?" Eiji repeated. "What about me?"

"Ride with Taka or something." Said Inui as he grabbed one of the horses and attempted to mount it but failed miserably.

"You make it look so easy, Taka!" said Momo as he failed as well.

"I guess as pirates you guys don't have the skill of mounting horses!" said Eiji as he grabbed one of the horses and jumped up on it with ease.

Momo and Inui frowned, and eventually Momo climbed on the back of Eiji's and Inui climbed on the back of Taka's.

"Okay, so which way are we going?" Taka asked.

"Head that way." Inui said, pointing.

Taka started riding in the direction that was required with such expertise. Eiji followed after him with less expertise, but ENOUGH to keep up. They just left the other one there to fend for itself in the cold cruel world.

"There's a short cut through these woods to the path that we saw the kidnappers take off down!" said Momo.

"Many thanks for the tip!"

The quartet craned their necks to look behind them and saw that ever so familiar prince gaining on them while also mounted on a horse.

"Hey!" said Taka as he tried to urge his horse to go faster but there was too much weight. Soon, the prince caught up to them and passed right by, disappearing off in the distance.

"That's no good!" said Eiji.

"At this rate, he's going to rescue the princess before us!" said Momo. "And we'll never get out of here!"

"We need to lose some weight!" Taka said, looking back at Inui.

"Why does it have to be me?" said Inui.

"Inui, I know you're smarter than that." Said Taka with a frown.

"Oh very well." Said Inui.

Taka quickly came to a stop and practically shoved Inui off the horse. Then he tore off deeper into the forest, leaving the others in his dust. Just when he thought all was lost, he saw the path up ahead of him, and even better, he saw the prince rounding out onto the path.

"Sir Takashi!" said the prince, sounding surprised. "How did you catch up?"

"I lost some weight!" said Taka.

"Then I suppose it is a race between the two of—" the prince began but he was unable to finish because both he and Taka had been looking at each other, therefore had not been looking FORWARD, so they had both crashed into a low branch. They were clothes lined off their horses and landed on their backs on the path as their horses took off.

They lied there for a few seconds.

"Oww…" they both whined.

This clued them into the fact that they were still in the presence of their rival, so they jumped to their feet and faced each other.

The prince was the first one to draw his sword.

"Come!" he said. "We shall have our duel right now to decide who is truly worthy of the princess's love!"

Taka froze.

"Draw your sword!" The prince ordered.

Slowly, Taka reached for his sword and pulled it out of the sheath. He held it in his hand for a long while before he suddenly burst into flames and triumphantly posed with the sword high in the air as if he had already won.

"ALL RIGHT! COME ON! BURNING!" he screamed.

The prince looked awfully bewildered as he stumbled backwards. Taka immediately went on the offensive and started throwing his sword back and forth wildly, but the prince skillfully (and luckily) parried or blocked each of the attacks.

"One handed Hadoukyuu!" Taka screamed as his sword like LITERALLY erupted into flames and he mightily swung it with one hand. The prince raised his sword to block it, and as the two of them clashed, the prince's shattered into a million trillion pieces.

The prince fell to the ground because of the force of the attack, now unarmed, as Taka stood with his sword pointed under the prince's chin.

Both remained like that for quite the while, until they heard the sound of a horse trotting up.

"Taka, what are you doing?" Momo said, looking surprised. The three of them were on one very pooped looking horse.

Inui jumped off the horse and calmly confiscated the sword from Taka.

Taka looked at the prince and then at Inui, Eiji and Momo.

"I'm sorry…" said Taka, looking back at the prince.

But the prince just backed away from Taka as fast as he could and ran in the opposite direction faster than the speed of light.

"Wow." Said Eiji, leaning on the poor horse's head after observing the prince's reaction and the broken sword on the ground. "Really, what did you do?"

"We uh…had our duel…" Taka answered as he heard another horse coming, and luckily enough, it was just his sword returning after it had noticed that Taka was not aboard.

"I thought you said you couldn't duel." Inui said, putting the sword in Taka's sheath for safe keeping.

"I didn't THINK I could…" Taka admitted as he grabbed the reins of his horse and pulled himself up. He then helped Inui up as well, and once again, they started to ride.

"How far ahead were they?" Eiji asked, sounding bored that they had to ride for so long.

"You two didn't exit much later after they did." Inui said. "But we have dawdled a lot."

"I think I see something up ahead." Taka reported, squinting.

They all looked ahead to see a few horses going at a slower pace. Inui instructed them to stray from the path and ride parallel to the other riders.

Momo patted his pockets and then pulled out a telescope. He peered through it for a bit and then reported, "They've got the princess!"

"Why are you carrying that telescope around?" Eiji asked.

"Because I'm a pirate." Momo answered.

"Can I see it?" said Eiji.

"No!" said Momo. "You have to steer the horse!"

"That's not fair…" whined Eiji as he faced forward.

"Here's the plan." Said Inui. "We ride over there. Get the princess. Then we leave."

"Well, I don't know how we can fail with THAT plan!" said Momo sarcastically.

"It's easy enough." Said Taka.

Taka and Eiji reared their horses and rode directly towards the kidnappers, ambushing them. The kidnappers were all quite frightened and startled as they tried to collect themselves, but most of them had fallen off their horses, including the one that had been carrying the princess.

"Hand the princess over and no one will get hurt!" said Momo as he jumped off the horse and drew his pirate sword.

Everyone else did the same, except for Eiji who suddenly found that he didn't have a sword and instantly felt less cool than the rest.

"Sir Takashi, my HERO!" exclaimed the princess as she fainted.

"What about the rest of us?" said Inui.

"Just be thankful she didn't recognize you from when you guys kidnapped her." Eiji said.

The kidnappers looked around frantically and realized they were totally out of their league, since all the mounted kidnappers had taken off. So they dropped the princess and ran off as fast as they could while waving their arms in the air like fool children.

The pirates and knights looked at each other, shrugged, and put away their weapons.

Slowly, they approached the unconscious princess.

"You saved the princess." Eiji commented to Taka. "That means you have to marry her."

"No I don't!" said Taka.

"That's what the king said." Eiji reminded him.

"You guys helped!" Taka said.

"But you did most of it!" Eiji argued as if it made a huge difference.

"Why aren't we changing Universes?" Momo said to Inui, totally unconcerned with Taka and Eiji's disagreement.

"Maybe we have to take her back to the castle." Said Inui, looking at the remote that still said 'rescue the princess'.

Taka leaned over and made an action like he was ABOUT to pick her up, but almost as soon as he touched her, they were all enveloped in white light.

"What's going on?" Eiji said.

"This is it." Said Momo. "This is happened when we got transported last time!"

"What luck." Said Inui as he whipped out the controller and pressed the changing channel button.

When the white light cleared, everyone was once again disappointed to find that they weren't home.

"That's a disappointment!" said Taka, standing up. Then he caught sight of his white horse. "Hey guys…my horse followed us."

Everyone looked at the horse, and then looked enviously at Taka. He and Eiji were still dressed as their appointed positions from Knight Universe, while Inui and Momo were, yes, STILL pirates.

They certainly looked out of place in this new Universe. It was very dark. That might have been because it was it was nighttime, but they got the vibe that this place was probably darker than normal places even in the daytime. The shadows were hard, and the outlines were equally defined. There was a distinct fog set on the little town they were in the middle of, but they got the general feeling that no one was around.

After taking a closer look at one of the shop windows, Eiji gasped.

"It's black and white!" said Eiji.

"We're in Black and White Universe?" Momo said as a question mark formed above his head.

"It is awfully suspicious for strange people to be wandering around at this time of night."

They turned around and saw a set of feet in the shadows. They peered at the intrusive figure, but it was impossible to get anymore information from the murky shadows that concealed his face.

Slowly, the figure took a few steps forward, his body becoming illuminated more and more as he stepped out into view. He was wearing a long gray trench coat and an old fashion hat, having it dipped over one eye. He was also holding a cigarette lazily in one hand, and his other hand was in his pocket.

"…Atobe?"


	7. Evidence

Channel 7- Evidence

"Why are YOU here?" said Inui.

"What do you mean?" said Atobe. "I should be asking you that same question. Why am I here? You seem to know."

He looked Inui up and down.

"And WHY are you dressed like that?" he said, looking disgusted. "Though, I must admit, it's a bit of a relief to see some color again."

"Apparently people got scattered across all these different universes, and it's up to us to jump around and find them!" said Momo. "But we sort of telepathically figured that it would just be people who sort of lived in our area, or even just our tennis team including the non-Regulars and maybe the girl's team too…"

"I apologize." Said Atobe. "But I have been here for three and a half days, and I must say that I am actually glad to see the four of you."

"What is this place anyway?" Eiji asked.

Atobe reached into his pocket and pulled out a leather wallet. He opened it up and showed them his badge.

"I'm a detective." Atobe answered. "And this is the gloomy run-down city that I am residing in, where crime rules the street and even the most honest of men get mixed up in the most dishonest of trades."

They all stared at him.

"It's the lingo." Said Atobe. "You try living here for three days and not picking it up."

"Well, thankfully this shows a 26 now." Inui looked at the remote control. "But no mission yet."

"Is that the little thing that caused all this trouble?" Atobe sighed.

"Yes." Inui answered. "And we have to wait for it to tell us what we have to do. And once it tells us, we are taken to another Universe. At least, that's how it's been working so far."

"So…" Atobe meandered to the others, pointed back at Inui and then at Momo. "Pirates."

"Yeah." Said Momo. "Got a problem?"

"None." Atobe shrugged, and then he looked at Taka and Eiji. "Knights?"

"Right." Taka nodded.

"Both of you?" Atobe said.

"Obviously." Said Eiji, putting his hands on his hips.

"Is there anyone else here that you know?" Inui asked.

"Hmm?" Atobe said. "Well, now that you mention it, yes. Oshitari."

"Oshitari's here?" said Eiji. "Why didn't you say anything before?"

"How was I to know that that was important to know?" Atobe waved his hand around.

"Are you really smoking that?" Momo asked, pointing at the cigarette.

"No." Atobe answered. "I just carry it around to look cool."

"Seriously or are you being sarcastic?" Momo clarified.

"Seriously." Atobe glared. "YOU try living here for three days and not picking it up."

"You can't use that as your excuse for every strange thing you do." Eiji warned.

"Watch me." Atobe said.

"So why don't you take us to Oshitari now?" said Inui. "I have a theory that the mission does not appear until all the people from the Universe that do not belong are together."

"I can't take you to Oshitari." Atobe said.

"Why not?" Momo demanded.

"He's in the middle of an investigation." Atobe answered. "Did you not hear me? We are detectives."

"You never said that Oshitari was a detective." Eiji pointed out.

"He's right." Said Momo. "You never did."

"Putting that aside," Inui said. "Why does it even matter that he's in the middle of an investigation? We have to hurry and collect up the rest of the people that are stranded."

"We can't just compromise our investigation." Atobe said.

"You'll have to." Said Inui. "It's just an alternate universe so it won't directly affect anything you do when you leave."

"Yeah, I mean, Taka was supposed to get married but we ditched his future wife so we could come and save you guys." Said Eiji.

"I was NOT going to marry her!" said Taka adamantly.

"Nevertheless," said Atobe. "Whether it doesn't matter to you all or not, Oshitari and I have apparently been working on this case for years, because apparently Oshitari's past lover's husband was murdered, and apparently he still is deeply in love with her, so apparently this case has been running his life."

They all stared at him.

"That's what we gathered when we met her." Atobe said.

"Her?" said Momo.

"Her…" Atobe said, looking up at the half covered full moon. "She was the kind of dame you could smell coming down the halls, even though the cruel rain of this desolate town should have washed out the scent along with the rest of the sorry residents of this godforsaken hellhole that's just our little part of—"

He stopped suddenly when he realized he was being stared at skeptically.

"What?" said Atobe.

"You're doing it again." Said Eiji. "That lingo thing."

"Well you try staying here for three days and not picking it up." Atobe said, looking offended.

"Now this woman who is supposedly Oshitari's past lover…" Inui said. "Does he ACTUALLY have any feelings for her?"

"Not that I know of." Atobe said. "But apparently something happened in the past."

"We got that." Said Momo.

"So why would he care if we just did whatever we had to do to complete the mission and just dropped the case?" Inui questioned.

"I suppose he might not care, then again, he might." Atobe answered vaguely.

Just then, another figure emerged from the shadows, having almost an identical entrance that Atobe had earlier. Instead, this time, instead of the figure stepping out and being ATOBE, he revealed himself as OSHITARI!

"Hmm…so the lot of you is here as well." He commented, looking at the four members of Seigaku.

"Oshitari, so good of you to join us." Said Atobe.

"I've been here the whole time." Said Oshitari. "In the shadows."

"So you already know what is going on, then." Inui inferred.

"Yes." Oshitari said.

Inui looked at the remote as the 26 turned into a 25. Then the screen changed and some letters appeared. And what do letters do? They make words. And them words? They make sentences.

"Solve the case." Inui read morbidly.

"What?" said everyone.

"That's the mission." Inui said. "It's what we have to do."

"How quaint." Said Oshitari.

"Then let's get started already!" said Momo.

"What do you guys know about the case already?" Taka asked.

Oshitari took a deep breath. "The case…" he began, putting the cigarette in his mouth but not smoking it. It only just sat there. "She came to me that night all those years ago, and the rain was heavier than the weight of my heart seeing her like the scared and confused star in the sky that shows—"

"At this rate, we'll be here for days!" Eiji said, throwing his hands up in the air.

"Why don't you just SHOW us the clues you have?" Inui suggested.

"All right." Said Atobe. "We'll have to head back to our detective office, though."

"Fine." Said Inui. "Lead the way."

They all started walking, and as they did, dramatic music was playing. It was mostly just a loud piano that put all his heart and soul into making the emotion real, but it certainly got the effect right.

"Here it is." Atobe said, gesturing towards the most modest looking place in town. Taka tied his horse up outside the door and they all went inside.

"It's so small…" Eiji said as they started looking around.

"Have you guys been sleeping here?" said Momo, pointing at the two cots that were in opposite corners.

"Well, we both appeared here." Said Oshitari. "And it's too much of a hassle to go out and find where we actually lived."

"Maybe if we had to stay here any longer we would have been motivated enough to look." Atobe said.

"Um… all right…" said Momo, raising an eyebrow.

"Is this all you have on the case?" Inui said, looking at a table with items scattered across it.

"Yeah." Said Atobe, walking over and pointing around the area. "This is everything we could find about the case. Evidence, suspects, clues, leads. You name it."

Inui looked over a few of the notes.

"And you haven't already figured it out?" Inui questioned.

"Well we've only had three days." Atobe said. "And keep in mind that the first day was spent pretty much assuming that we were dreaming."

"And then we spent the second day abusing our authority." Said Oshitari. "You know, with the badges and all."

"Oh right." Atobe nodded. "And didn't we do that again on the third day?"

"Yeah, pretty much." Oshitari said. "And then we got all this stuff out and took a look at it about two hours ago."

"You guys have to stop talking." Momo advised. "It's really not that flattering."

"So?" Atobe ignored Momo and looked at Inui. "Have you figured anything out yet?"

"Not yet." Inui said. "I have a pretty good idea of who I believe is at fault, but I want to be sure so I have to go through the rest of the evidence and the notes so we don't end up chasing after the wrong person and prolonging our stay here."

"Well, take your time then." Said Oshitari, kicking off his shoes and lying down on one of the cots. "But I'm going to sleep."

"I thought this was a case that's ruling your life." Taka said.

"My alternate universe self's life." Oshitari corrected.

"Well where are WE supposed to sleep?" said Momo. "I'm tired too!"

"You spent practically the whole time sleeping while we were in Knight Universe!" said Eiji as if that offended him.

"Yeah, but that was a long time ago!" Momo said. "Besides, it's the middle of the night and I don't feel like waiting for Inui to figure stuff out!"

"Whatever you do, just stop whining about it." Atobe said.

Momo found some extra blankets in the closet and lied them down on the floor. Within a few minutes, he was sleeping. Everyone else decided to stay up and wait with Inui as he tried to evaluate the culprits but they soon became very bored with him just sitting there reading so they decided to hit the hay as well. Atobe told everyone to stay away from his cot while Taka and Eiji whined for a little while. So they finally took some of the blankets from Momo because they were third years AND they were knights and went to sleep.

Inui stared down the notes as Atobe just sat there on the edge of his cot.

"How many people did you say are left to retrieve?" Atobe asked.

"Twenty-five now." Inui answered.

"Twenty-five people total?" Atobe said.

"Twenty-five people in addition to the six of us." Inui clarified.

"Well, at this rate, I suppose there are two people in each Universe, if the pattern continues." Atobe concluded. "So that means there are about twelve or thirteen more Universes we have to visit."

"I wouldn't be so sure of the fact that there are two in each Universe." Inui said. "It's likely that it's very random, and if you'll notice we're at an odd number since the beginning. And now I'm worried about what kind of people we will find, because I didn't expect you or Oshitari to be here. As we said earlier, we had assumed it would be limited to people who were around the area when I began my experiment."

Atobe sat there looking contemplative.

"Have you figured it out yet?" Atobe asked.

"Of course I haven't." Inui said, turning around and glaring at Atobe. "You have been talking to me the whole time so I haven't been able to read."

"Well stop talking to me and read then." Atobe instructed.

"That's what I've been TRYING to do." Inui defended himself.

"Whatever." Said Atobe as he lied down on his cot and pulled the blankets up over him.

Inui shook his head and continued reading the notes.


	8. Big Mac

Channel 8- Big Mac

Oshitari was the first one to wake up the next morning. He found Inui asleep sprawled out on the desk, and instead of doing anything about him, he just walked right by and lit a cigarette. He didn't smoke it, though. He only held it.

Then he made himself some coffee. He didn't drink that. He just held it.

Then he went to the window. He looked out it. NO REALLY! HE DID! He didn't just go to the window to stand in that particular part of the room! Imagine that!

It was raining.

He looked like he was about to go into a long monologue when he noticed Taka sitting across the room brewing some coffee.

"Um…hey!" Taka said.

"Hi." Said Oshitari.

The two of them remained in silence for a little while.

"So…" Taka said. "How's the case been going so far?"

Oshitari gave a heavy sigh. "Let me put it this way, I keep two magnums in my desk," he said wistfully. "One's a gun, and I make sure to keep it loaded. The other's a bottle, and it keeps me loaded. I'm Oshitari Yuushi…private eye."

Oshitari put down his coffee and put that hand in his pocket, and Taka only watched him move across the room.

"This case is no easy case, but then again, you don't hire a private eye for the easy cases. And if only business was as good as my aim, I'd be on easy street. I still remember the day trouble walked in my door. Blonde, as usual."

He looked mournfully back at the window. "The sound of her tears soaking in her tissue is not what moved me, but the sound of greenbacks slapping across my palm was music for to my ears, because it meant she had a case, even though she sounded like a case herself. But I can't choose my clients."

Taka blinked and twiddled his fingers. He didn't think it would be very polite to tell Oshitari that he didn't want to hear the WHOLE story. Just something that might potentially help in the future solving of the case.

"It was the dame's husband." Oshitari said. "She thought it was Big Mac."

"Big Mac?" Taka repeated skeptically.

"Yes." Said Oshitari. "You see, Big Mac tends to make people disappear by introducing them to a friend very close to his heart. A little down and left, to be specific, and this friend is an eloquent speaker and usually makes two or three profound arguments while he leaves the room."

"I don't get your analogy." Taka said, looking ultimately confused, but was thankfully rescued when Eiji walked in yawning flamboyantly.

"Good morning!" Eiji exclaimed. Then he looked out the window. "Aw man! Raining?"

"Obviously!" said Taka with a chuckle.

"I feel like it always rains on Mondays around here." Said Oshitari. "And every day feels like a Monday when work is a full time job."

"Wait, so is it Monday right now?" Eiji said, but Oshitari didn't answer because he was WAY too busy looking wistful.

Eiji only stared at Oshitari, and then looked over at Taka who shrugged just as flamboyantly as Eiji was JUST yawning.

"I wonder if Inui solved the case last night." Said Eiji. "I kind of feel bad. Maybe we should have stayed up with him!"

"Yeah, I saw him sleeping on the table." Taka said.

Eiji sighed. "Hey, Oshitari…" he said.

"Mm?" Oshitari said.

"I've seen a few of these old detective movies that look like this…" Eiji began. "And doesn't it always turn out in the end that the dame is the one who did it in the end?"

Oshitari only stood there.

"Never mind!" said Eiji with a sigh. "And uh…I kind of have another random question. Do you have a weapon?"

"A gun…" said Oshitari, patting his pockets as if he had forgotten where he had left it, and then he pulled one out from inside his coat.

"I'm the only one who doesn't get a weapon!" Eiji pouted. "All I have is this dumb butter knife."

He pulled a small dagger out of a tiny sheath on his belt.

"I don't think that's a butter knife." Said Taka.

"Well, not literally of course." Said Eiji. "Nothing's literal in this world!"

"I suppose that's true." Nodded Taka.

Just then, Atobe walked in. "There's an all-percussion symphony playing in my head." He said. "The orchestra's going on a ten-city tour and I have season tickets with a front row seat."

"I hear you." Said Oshitari with a look of despair.

Eiji and Taka looked at each other skeptically, and this time they BOTH shrugged flamboyantly.

"By the way, does anyone know if Inui solved the case?" Atobe asked as he poured himself some coffee and held the cup.

Oshitari picked up his own cup and held it.

Eiji noticed that Taka was holding a cup of coffee too, and he didn't want to be left out so he poured himself a cup as well.

He couldn't help but notice the contrast of the intense outlines of the cup in comparison to his own normal outlines. Not to mention the fact that it was all black and white contrasted to his bright colors.

So they all stood around holding their coffee cups but not drinking any coffee.

"Hello?" said Atobe.

"What?" said everyone.

"I asked you all a question." Atobe reminded them.

They stared at him blankly.

"Do you know if Inui solved the case?" Atobe repeated.

"Oh." Said the others. "No."

At that exact moment, Inui entered with a piece of paper in his hand.

"I believe I have solved the case." He said.

"How convenient." Said Atobe.

"Let's wake up Momo so you can give us the low down!" said Eiji.

"Very well." Inui said as he watched Eiji put down his coffee and dart back into the other room.

Inui stared at the coffee and then picked it up. Once again, everyone in the room was just hanging around holding coffee mugs.

Then Eiji and Momo came back in, and Eiji demanded to have his coffee back, so Inui gave it back. And then he poured himself some coffee.

"I want some coffee too." Said Momo.

"Then get some." Said Inui as he stood by the coffee machine with his cup.

Momo poured himself some coffee and faced the others. He took a sip.

The others looked at him curiously.

"What are you doing?" Oshitari said finally.

"What?" said Momo as he took another sip.

"That." Oshitari said. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing." Said Momo, still confused.

"You're drinking your coffee." Said Atobe.

"I know." Said Momo. "That's why I poured myself some."

The others looked at each other, and then slowly put their coffee on whatever surface was closest to them. Momo observed this, and automatically assumed that there must be something wrong with the coffee so he put his down as well. But everyone just looked at him and called him a poser IN THEIR MINDS. Now Momo was going to be forever labeled as a poser.

"Anyway," said Atobe. "Inui, didn't you say that you solved the case?"

"It's Big Mac, isn't it?" Oshitari said.

"At first, I didn't think so." Said Inui. "But then I found a compelling piece of evidence that must have been swept over initially because clearly it points directly to Big Mac."

"Does Big Mac know that he has a hilarious gangster name?" Eiji wondered out loud. It was one of those questions that could have been answered, but everyone decided to interoperate it as rhetorical because no one felt like answering him.

"You don't have to explain it fully." Said Momo to Inui since Inui looked like he was about to go into Explain Mode.

"Why?" said Inui.

"Because we believe you." Momo said.

They all stood around and waited to be teleported to the next Universe. Inui even had the remote out and had his hand on the button to change the channel. However, nothing happened.

"What's going on?" said Taka. "We solved the case, didn't we? Shouldn't we go to the next Universe?"

"Maybe we have to do more than just figure out who the culprit is." Said Atobe. "Perhaps we must actually make sure justice is served the low life scum of this town."

"Then let's report him to the proper authorities and then we can get out of here!" Eiji said cheerfully.

"WE are the proper authorities." Atobe said, pointing to himself and Oshitari.

"It's up to us to take care of this case." Said Oshitari.

"After justice is served, I suppose we will go to the next Universe." Inui concluded. "Hopefully."

"So we're going to have to find this guy." Said Momo.

"Where can we find this Big Mac?" Taka asked Oshitari.

"You mean BESIDES McDonalds?" Eiji said, and that one was obviously a rhetorical question.

"He works out of a small warehouse by the docks." Said Oshitari.

"So I guess our next stop is that small warehouse by the docks." Taka said.

Everyone stood up like they were ready to leave, but Oshitari raised his hand to signal them all to stop.

"Hang on." He said. "You four will draw too much attention to yourselves if you go out like that."

"It's true." Said Atobe. "Not only are you dressed in strange clothes, but you're in color, and that will likely catch the eye of Big Mac and all his flunkies."

"We can't change the fact that we're in color and you guys aren't." said Momo.

"But we can try to hide it." Atobe said as he flung open the closet doors to reveal numerous gray trench coats lined up on hangers, as well as several hats on the shelves above the coats.

After a quick wardrobe change, they were ready to go. And even though it made Taka sad, everyone advised against bringing his horse. They figured that would bring a LOT of unwanted attention to them. And in a town like this, any kind of attention is unwanted.

DUN DUN DUUUUUNNNNNN.


	9. Chastity

Channel 9- Chastity

"So how come we're not going to the docks right now again?" said Inui as he and all those in COLOR followed Oshitari and Atobe while they walked in the opposite direction as the docks.

"Because it's morning." Oshitari answered. "And Big Mac only works at night."

"How can you tell it's morning?" Eiji asked, huddling under his umbrella. "It looks as dark and foggy as it did when we first got here."

"By the way," said Atobe as he turned around and tore the umbrella out of Eiji's hand. "How many times do we have to tell you? You're going to draw too much attention to yourself if you use a freakin' umbrella."

"Why can't I use an umbrella?" Eiji demanded. "It's raining!"

Atobe tossed it aside. "Nobody in this world uses umbrellas." Atobe reminded him.

"Then how come Taka gets to bring his horse around with him?" Eiji whined, pointing at Taka who, sure enough, was holding the reins of his horse. "I think THAT'S drawing more attention than my umbrella!"

They all stared at Taka.

"What?" said Taka.

"You know…Eiji has a point." Momo admitted.

"No he doesn't!" said Taka, grabbing his horse protectively.

"I thought you left it back at the office." Oshitari said. Then he turned to Atobe. "We should take the horse back to our place and hide it."

"I agree." Atobe said. "And maybe while we're there, we can pick up that other case and hopefully get it solved while we're waiting for it to get dark."

Inui stopped walking.

"OTHER CASE?" he said, raising his voice ever so slightly to show JUST how enraged he was.

"Yeah." Said Oshitari. "We don't usually work two cases at once, supposedly, but we made an exception because the dame's case as been cold for so long, and because of personal involvement in said case."

"Have either of you ever taken a moment to consider the fact that when the remote control told us to 'solve the case' they might have been talking about this OTHER case that you failed to mention?" Inui questioned of the two detectives.

Atobe and Oshitari looked at each other and then back at Inui.

"No." they both answered in that tone that suggested they were ABOUT to follow up with "So?" but didn't for unknown reasons.

"What does that mean now?" Eiji asked.

"It means we might have to solve both cases in order to get out of here." Inui replied.

"Two cases?" whined Momo. "ONE was going to be annoying enough."

"Okay, so why don't you tell us about this case then too?" said Taka, trying to remain more patient than the others, but that obviously didn't take too much effort.

"Very well," said Atobe putting his hand on his hat and dipping it down in front of his eye to go for the effect. "It all started with the dame. I knew she was trouble when she first walked in. Dames usually are trouble but this one knew something, something that was making her flock to the—"

"Could we skip that part?" Momo said.

"What part?" said Atobe, looking annoyed that Momo had interrupted him.

"Just go right to the part about the evidence and stuff like that." Inui advised.

"Mainly, she claimed she lost her identity." Oshitari said, waving his cigarette.

"Her identity?" said everyone else, except for Atobe of course.

"On the corner of 34th Street, no less." Atobe added. "That's the most dangerous part of town, but she refused to tell us what she was doing in a place like that."

"She was going to get her way whether we all liked it or not, and she liked her way when others didn't like it." Oshitari said.

"Stop talking like that!" Momo said angrily.

"So how do you plan on going about solving this woman's identity crisis?" Taka asked.

"I figure we can make all the regular stops." Said Oshitari. "Check in on Jimmy the Rat."

"Jimmy the Rat?" they repeated.

"Yeah, he's called that in this town for two reasons." Atobe said, holding up two fingers. "First, he's got his hands in everything happening on 34th Street."

"And the other reason?" Eiji prodded.

"He likes cheese." Atobe answered flatly.

"Aha…" said everyone with a nod.

"So where can we find this Jimmy the Rat?" Inui said.

"Right here." Said Oshitari as he gestured at an old abandoned warehouse. They went inside, and sure enough, there was a poker game going on in the depths of the abandonment.

"Let Oshitari handle this." Said Atobe, getting in everyone's way as he allowed Oshitari to go ahead. They watched curiously, wondering what exactly what was going to happen.

"Jimmy the Rat." Said Oshitari in a commanding voice as he rolled in.

"What're ya doin' here, Oshitari?" Jimmy the Rat looked up and discarded a piece of cheese he had been eating. Everyone else at the table saw Oshitari and scattered like roaches under the light.

"Tell me about the dame." Said Oshitari.

"About the dame?" said Jimmy the Rat.

"You know what dame I'm talking about."

"I don't know nothin' 'bout no dame." Said Jimmy the Rat.

"You know what dame I'm talking about." Said Oshitari. "You know her. She lost her identity on 34th Street, and something like that doesn't just happen without you knowing about it, or somehow being apart of it."

"I ain't sayin' NOTHIN'!" said Jimmy the Rat as he sat down and crossed his arms so he was facing away from Oshitari.

Big mistake. Oshitari gave a heavy sigh and removed his cigarette that had just been hanging out in his mouth and grabbed Jimmy the Rat around the neck. "Tell me about the girl, Jimmy!" Oshitari ordered.

"I don't know nothin'!" Jimmy the Rat yelled as he flailed around helplessly.

"Tell me, I know you know!" said Oshitari as he extinguished the cigarette on Jimmy the Rat's skin.

The others observing winced and tried not to look.

Jimmy the Rat wailed in pain. "GO TO MIKEY!" he yelled.

Oshitari stopped and let go of Jimmy. He took two steps away from him and then stopped.

"Mikey DiKlepto?" Oshitari clarified.

Jimmy the Rat nodded, still caressing his singed cheek.

"I'll let you off easy because you told me to go to Mikey." Said Oshitari, coming back over to Jimmy the Rat. Then he started to walk away, but at the last second, he spun back around, grabbed Jimmy the Rat's head and snapped his neck, then flicked his cigarette at Jimmy the Rat's limp body.

Then he went over to where everyone else was standing with their mouths hanging open.

Except for Atobe, of course, who just handed him another cigarette.

"You let him off easy." Atobe commented.

"What can I say? I'm a softy." Said Oshitari as he lit his cigarette.

"Oshitari!" said Eiji. "You just KILLED a man!"

"So?" said Oshitari, adjusting his trench coat.

It was impossible to argue with logic like that so they followed Atobe and Oshitari to their next destination.

"This… Mikey DiKlepto…" Inui started. "I trust you know where to find him as well?"

"Yeah…" said Atobe. "He runs a business up here, but it's hard to run an honest business with a last name like 'DiKlepto'."

The others nodded in agreement as they approached a run down looking building.

"DiKlepto!" Atobe called as he marched into the building. This time, Oshitari held the others back and assured them to let Atobe handle it.

"Atobe." Said a man who was standing behind the counter as he looked up dramatically with music that suggested the pianist had just slammed his hands down on as many keys as he could reach.

"Tell me what I want to know, DiKlepto." Said Atobe.

"I don't know nothin'." Said Mikey DiKlepto. "You know me. I run an honest business. I left that life behind me a long time ago."

"Jimmy the Rat sent me." Atobe said.

This made Mikey DiKlepto look a little nervous. "This about that dame?" he said, his voice shaking.

"So you do know her." Said Atobe.

"What can I say?" Mikey DiKletpo said. "Old habits die hard."

"So I've heard." Atobe said. "So tell me what I need to know and I'll be on my way."

"I ain't gonna talk to you, Detective." Said Mikey DiKlepto, trying to look smug. "I already told you I gots my life on track. I'm an honest man with an honest business."

"Is that so?" said Atobe as he grabbed Mikey DiKlepto by the collar from across the counter and pulled him up over it. He shook him a bit, and then reached his free hand into his pocket and pulled out a wallet. He let go of Mikey DiKlepto and waved the wallet. "This is MY wallet here, see?"

Sure enough, Atobe revealed that the wallet's interior belonged entirely to him.

"I'll say it again…old habits die hard." Said Mikey DiKlepto.

"Come on out here." Atobe ordered.

Mikey DiKlepto walked around the counter and then sat down at a table. Atobe stood beside him.

"Listen," he said. "Go to…" he paused and pulled another wallet out of his pocket and handed it to Atobe, looking briefly at the inside first. "Mickey Two Times."

"Mickey Two Times?" said Atobe, looking inside to see that the wallet belonged to said gangster. "You sure about that?"

"Yeah." Said Mikey DiKlepto. "And get out of my shop before you scare away the other fish."

"Right…" said Atobe as he started to walk away. "Oh, I almost forgot."

He spun around, grabbed Mikey DiKlepto's head and then snapped his neck as well.

"WHOA WHOA WHOA!" said Eiji, waving his arms as Atobe came back over with the wallet.

"Could you guys stop killing people?" said Taka. "It's making me feel uncomfortable."

"He had it coming." Said Atobe, and Oshitari nodded in agreement.

"So what about this Mickey Two Times?" said Inui. "Let me guess…you guys know just where to find him."

"Of course." Said Oshitari. "Even though we've only been in this Universe for four days, it doesn't take long to find out where the scum lives."

"Mickey Two Times…" Atobe mumbled. "He got that name because he's stabbed everyone in the back at least twice. And he says everything two times."

"Let's get this over with." Said Momo. "And remember, stop killing people!"

Oshitari and Atobe glared at Momo and then led the group to an alleyway.

"We better handle this one together." Said Oshitari to Atobe.

Atobe nodded in agreement, and they advised the others to stay behind. They wanted to follow to make sure Atobe and Oshitari didn't kill poor Mickey Two Times, but the alley was scary, so they decided to stay where there was a little more light.

"Mickey." Said Atobe.

A man emerged from the shadows. "Detectives! Detectives!" he said.

"Tell us about the dame." Oshitari ordered.

"What dame? What dame?"

"You know what dame!" said Atobe angrily.

"I don't know nothin'! Know nothin'!"

Atobe didn't say anything else, he just reached over and grabbed Mickey Two Times and snapped his neck. As Mickey Two Times crumbled to the floor, Atobe looked at Oshitari and said, "It was getting annoying."

"I agree." Said Oshitari.

The Knights and Pirates stomped over.

"STOP KILLING PEOPLE." They said.

"You didn't even get any information from him!" said Eiji.

"Oh, I think I've got this case figured out already." Said Oshitari. Atobe nodded. "We have to go back to our office."

"Why?" said Momo.

"I agree." Said Inui. "The pieces are falling together."

"WHAT?" said Eiji, Momo and Taka.

They turned to leave, but Atobe pulled out Mickey Two Time's wallet and tossed it to him. "Mikey DiKlepto sends his regards." He said coolly.

So they all followed Oshitari and Atobe back to their office and when they opened the door, there was a dame sitting at one of the desks.

"Chastity." Oshitari and Atobe said ominously.

"Detectives." Said the woman, standing up.

"I don't get it," Momo whispered to Taka. "Is this Oshitari's past lover whose husband was murdered, or is this the dame that lost her identity?"

"Er…" Taka said slowly.

"Have you found my identity?" said the woman.

"Well—" Taka started to Momo.

"NEVER MIND." Said Momo.

"I think you've known where your identity has been all along." Said Atobe.

"What do you mean?" said Chastity. "Are you accusing ME, Detectives?"

"Damn straight we are." Said Oshitari.

"All right, the jig is up." Said Chastity. "The truth is…I never had an identity and I was hoping…" she paused and looked dramatically at the two detectives. "One of you could find one for me."

"Identity?" said Atobe as he took off his hat and flung it across the room. "I got an identity for you right here."

He approached her speedily, grabbed her and dipped her, engaging in a very passionate kiss.

"WHAT IS GOING ON?" demanded the Pirates and Knights.

"Wow!" said Chastity as Atobe let her go.

"Was it good for you too?" said Atobe.

Chastity hardly had time to nod before Oshitari grabbed her and snapped her neck.

"You did NOT just do that!" said Momo.

"I never liked the lying type." Said Oshitari, flicking his cigarette.

"Never." Atobe said.

Then they all stood there for a while.

"So…we solved the case…" said Eiji. "What about that white light and that changing the channel business?"

"I suppose perhaps we're meant to solve the OTHER case." Said Inui, looking at the remote to see that it still told them to 'solve the case'.

"Well, at least that took up the day." Said Taka, looking out the window to see that the sun was setting. "We can go to the docks now, can't we?"

"We can." Said Atobe and Oshitari together.


	10. Chase

Channel 10- Chase

Taka left his horse back at the house, even though it pained him so much to do it. He was forming an emotional attachment to the horse and never wished for it to be out of his sight. But, unfortunately, for logical purposes, the horse had to sit this one out.

The group of six all sat huddled behind a large crate, waiting for something to happen.

"Psssttt…" hissed Eiji.

"Shh." Oshitari said.

"What are we waiting for?" Eiji said anyway.

"We're waiting for one of Big Mac's thugs to walk by so we can ambush him and force him to tell us where Big Mac is." Oshitari answered.

"Are you guys going to break his neck when you're done with him?" Momo questioned.

"Probably." Said Oshitari with a glare, almost as if he was angry with Momo for presuming otherwise.

"Why don't we just search the docks?" suggested Taka.

"Atobe and Oshitari's approach is the most logical." Inui said. "Though I don't see there being any necessity to kill anyone."

"Well, it's been four and a half days since we've gotten here, and that's just what happens in this Universe!" said Atobe.

"SHH!" said Taka as a thug started walking towards them.

They all ducked into the shadows as the thug meandered by.

"When do we jump him?" Eiji whispered, looking half excited and half worried.

"SHHH!" said everyone in a tone that was absolutely louder than Eiji's question in the first place.

This caused the thug to spin around. "Who's there?" he demanded.

"Forget that plan!" said Atobe as he whipped his gun out from his trench coat, stood up and riddled the thug with bullets.

"HEY!" said Momo. "We said no more killing people!"

"He wasn't even doing anything!" Taka said, looking depressed.

"But he was ABOUT to." Said Atobe, putting his gun away.

"Well, it was counterproductive to kill him because, if you remember correctly, we were going to ambush him and make him tell us where Big Mac is." Inui reminded Atobe.

Atobe stood there looking very serious for a minute.

"I knew that." He said, refusing to make eye contact with anyone.

"Someone likely heard the gunshots." Oshitari said. "We should get out of here."

"I agree." Said Atobe.

"Wait, so you guys are just going to take off?" said Momo, putting his hands on his hips. "After you killed this guy, you're just going to leave? You're making his death IN VAIN. That's just not fair to him."

Atobe smacked Momo across the face. "Get a hold of yourself, man!" he yelled.

"Hey!" said Momo as he looked betrayed and caressed his new injury. "I was completely a hold of myself! YOU'RE the one who needs to get a hold of yourself!"

Momo went to smack Atobe across the face, but Atobe caught his hand before he could.

"Don't even think about it." Atobe warned.

"Okay…fine…" said Momo.

Just when Inui was going to advise everyone to hurry up and leave right then, they heard the sound of a motor being revved.

"That can't be good." Taka said uneasily.

They all turned around as headlights shone in their faces. Then the car drove right at them, but luckily they all jumped out of the way just in the nick of time. The window in the backseat rolled down and the face of a sinister fat man poked outside and looked at them.

"Detectives." He said creepily.

"Big Mac." Said Atobe as they got to their knees.

"We know what you did." Said Oshitari. "And we have the evidence to prove it. You're finally going to be put behind bars."

"I was waiting for the day when you would be able to pin something on me." Said Big Mac, looking even more sinister IF POSSIBLE.

"So we can do this the easy way or the hard way." Said Oshitari.

"Catch me first, Detectives!" said Big Mac as he pulled back inside the car and then took off in the distance.

"Why do they always choose the hard way?" said Atobe.

"There's no way we'll be able to catch up to them!" said Momo, running up to where Atobe and Oshitari were both standing dramatically looking off in the direction Big Mac had gone.

"Yeah, even if we had a car, none of us are old enough to drive anyway." Inui said.

"If only I had my horse!" said Taka since he obviously has a one track mind. "Hey, where's Eiji, anyway?"

Just then, they heard the more comforting sound of a horse galloping up to them, and they looked over to see Eiji riding up with Taka's gorgeous horse that we all sort of have a crush on at this point.

"Am I a great squire or what?" said Eiji as he jumped off.

"Eiji, if I paid you, I would definitely give you a raise!" said Taka as he pulled himself up on the horse.

"Daw…you don't mean that…" said Eiji, looking flattered.

Inui stepped forth and grabbed the reins of the horse before Taka could take off again. "Still, I doubt even the speed of that horse will be able to catch up the car, especially since we've been standing around talking for so long." he said since he is the rain on everyone's parade.

"I know a short cut." Said Oshitari, coming over to the horse and attempting to pull himself up but only ended up failing. "Okay, so someone help me."

Taka helped pull Oshitari up while Atobe aided him as well.

"How could you know a shortcut unless you know exactly where Big Mac is going?" Taka asked as Oshitari tried to situate himself but there's really no comfortable way for two young male teens who don't really know each other to sit so snugly.

"This whole town is a maze of back roads and alleys." Oshitari answered. "If you know your way around, you can find anyone you want."

"But you don't know your way around." Taka pointed out.

"I didn't think so at first, but just trust me." Oshitari commanded.

"Fine…" said Taka as he kicked his heels into the horse and it started running.

Oshitari looked confused as different music started playing. Very heroic music that was quite dissimilar to the theatrical piano theme music that he was used to.

"What is that?" he said.

"Oh, I think that's my valiant theme music that plays when I'm chasing or riding my horse." Taka answered as if it were normal.

"I see." Said Oshitari with a frown.

"Where are we going by the way?" Taka said.

"Down that alley." Oshitari pointed.

Taka directed the horse down the alley and they popped out the other side just as a car rode by.

"I can't believe it, that was actually him!" said Taka, looking completely astounded.

"Hurry up!" said Oshitari.

They went faster and faster and faster and, for some reason, the horse was able to catch up with the car even though that could never physically happen in real life, just think about what Universe they're in after all.

They approached the car and caused it to swerve as it tried to lose them by going off down another alley, but Taka and Oshitari just pursued them wherever they went.

Oshitari whipped out his gun and took one shot at the back tire, causing it to explode. The car swerved some more and the horse could catch up even better.

The window rolled down, and there was one of Big Mac's flunkies with a machine gun.

"Oh no…" Taka said as he slid down the face mask of his helmet just as the flunky started taking shots at them wildly and randomly.

Of course, this is a machine gun we're talking about… taking shots at two guys on a horse.

Needless to say, the horse fell quite soon, hurling both Taka and Oshitari off of it and causing them to skid across the ground.

When they finally came to a stop, the first one to rise was Oshitari. For some odd reason, he was not injured in the least bit, and not even his hat had fallen off or his clothes ripped at all.

Oshitari got down to one knee, aimed the gun and took another shot at the car, hitting the other wheel, causing that one to explode as well. The car screeched around the corner and disappeared out of sight, but obviously the car had a few handicaps now.

Oshitari knew there was nothing he could do at that point, so he got to his feet and looked over at Taka who was still lying motionless on the road, and then at the horse which was just as motionless as Taka.

"So…you've killed them both…" said Oshitari dramatically as he clenched his fist and looked up at the sky. "Damn you…damn you all to hell!"

Then Taka started coughing and sat up.

Oshitari looked over at him, and if anyone else was there to see his expression, one might accuse him of disappointment. He went over to Taka to find out why he wasn't dead.

"Why aren't you dead?" Oshitari said.

"Good thing I was wearing this armor and this helmet or I might have died!" Taka said, taking off the helmet, moving the trench coat aside and looking down to see all the bullet sized dents in his armor. "How's my horse?"

"Um…" Oshitari looked back at Taka's horse. "Let's just…not look."

"Is it that bad…?" Taka's face looked like someone had just told him that Santa Claus isn't real. Even though he IS.

"Yeah…how about we just…yeah, let's go this way…" Oshitari helped Taka to his feet and they walked down an alleyway that just so happened to lead them right back to where everyone else was, despite how far they rode/drove during the chase scene.

"No luck?" Atobe said.

"No." said Taka, looking sad. "And now my horse is dead!"

"So…they killed Taka's horse…" said Atobe, clenching his fist and looking up at the sky. "Damn you…damn you all to hell!"

"It is a sad loss…" Eiji agreed, comforting Taka who was STILL sad.

"What can we do now?" Momo said. "Big Mac got away. How are we supposed to get him cause now we REALLY don't have any mode of transportation."

"He'll be back." Said Atobe.

"How can you be so sure?" said Inui. "Surely he's fleeing the town and, if he had any sense about him, he would just set up a new crime circle in a new town just as rundown as this one."

"There is no other town in this Universe." Said Oshitari. "This town IS the Universe. That's why I say they will surely be back."

"How long will that take?" Eiji asked.

Atobe glanced at his watch. "There's no telling." He said.

"In the meantime, I think it would be best to search Big Mac's docks and find any information about the case." Oshitari said.

"Didn't you say that this case is years old?" Inui said. "Why would he have information about it just lying around after so long?"

"Listen." Said Atobe with an exasperated sigh. "You have done nothing but question the workings of this Universe ever since you got here. All you have to do is assume that anything that would be ultimately convenient FOR US will happen. We are the tragic heroes, and our only flaw is our compassion for mankind. We can't even die."

"Oh right." Said Taka. "I've been meaning to ask about that. Oshitari, I must have been shot twenty times. How is it that you weren't shot at all?"

"Didn't I just say that?" said Atobe. "DIDN'T I?"

"We're the tragic heroes and our only flaw is our compassion for mankind. We cannot die." Oshitari repeated.

"So that means you guys can't be shot either?" Eiji asked.

"Right." Said Atobe.

"What about run through with a sword?" Momo questioned.

"Probably not." Oshitari said.

"Well that's not fair…" said Taka. "Oh! And you also only took two shots, and managed to hit the tires of the car that was so far away and moving—"

"TRAGIC HEROES." Said Atobe, his tone getting noticeably irritable. "ONLY FLAW. COMPASSION FOR MANKIND. CAN'T DIE."

"What else do you need to know about it?" Oshitari sighed as if the fact that it was hard to grasp this concept was STRANGE.

"Well, whether you two are immortal or not is yet to be determined." Inui said, wanting to get moving. "For now, let's poke around the docks and see what we can find out about the case and Big Mac. So we can comb the area better, we should split up."

"Good plan." Said Oshitari. "Atobe and I will go this way, and the rest of you can go that way."

"No." said Inui. "Oshitari, you take Taka and Momo. Eiji and I will follow Atobe."

"Very well." Said Oshitari, looking as though that was going to be the most painful thing in the entire world.

"I agree as well, but be careful." Said Atobe. "Some of Big Mac's flunkies could still be lurking about."

"So WHY are we splitting up?" Eiji cried.

"If you find anything useful, send up a flare." Said Oshitari, ignoring Eiji.

"Flare?" said the Pirates and Knights.

"WE have one." Said Atobe in that tone that suggests he believes that EVERYONE should carry around a flare.

The two groups formed and then parted ways.


	11. Shootout

Channel 11- Shootout

"Don't you ever run out of bullets?" Momo said to Oshitari.

"No." said Oshitari.

The three of them were behind an overturned desk. Taka and Momo were both waiting patiently as Oshitari had a shoot out with one of Big Mac's thugs. Unfortunately, Taka and Momo had no way to help because the only weapons they had were swords.

"Seriously…Inui has a shotgun…why didn't I get a shotgun?" Momo complained as he checked on his person one more time. "All I got was this dumb telescope."

"I thought you liked the telescope." Said Taka.

"I DID, until I realized how much I wanted a shotgun." Momo sighed as if it were a HUGE DEAL.

"I don't think we even had guns in my Universe." Taka said.

"Will you two be quiet?" Oshitari said, kneeling down and addressing them. "Can't you see I'm in the middle of a shoot out?"

"Well yeah." Said Momo. "But you've been going at it for like twenty minutes."

"And you haven't reloaded a single time." Taka added, gesturing at Oshitari's gun which OBVIOUSLY only held six bullets.

"I already told you, I never run out of bullets." Said Oshitari.

"We're just getting bored, that's all." Said Momo, crossing his arms.

"Fine." Oshitari rolled his eyes as he stood up and took one shot, and suddenly the opponent's gunfire ceased.

"You could have done that the entire time and you forced us to sit here and shoot blindly at a guy?" demanded Momo as he stood up and got in Oshitari's face.

"Yes." Said Oshitari. "To pass the time."

"Keep in mind that the two of us are still quite vulnerable when it comes to being shot in the chest." Momo said, pointing to himself and Taka.

"Actually, my armor did a pretty good job protecting me." Taka said, standing up as well.

"Fine then I'M very vulnerable to being shot in the chest!" Momo corrected.

"I'll keep that in mind." Said Oshitari, pocketing his gun.

"What are we even looking for?" said Taka, then he suddenly got SO sad.

"What?" said Momo.

"My horse…" he whined.

"Oh stop it." Said Oshitari.

"By the way, Oshitari." Said Momo as he started looking through some papers that had been flung across the room when they had flipped the table over for protection. "How many people have you killed since we got here?"

"Jimmy the Rat, that dame in your office, that random thug, and now that guy." Momo counted off his fingers. "Are we missing anyone?"

"Um…" said Oshitari, turning away from them. "Uh…let's just say you're NOT, all right?"

"Why, have you killed more people than that?" demanded Momo.

"Look what I just found." Said Oshitari as he picked up a piece of paper that appeared to be a signed confession that completely explained how Big Mac went about killing Oshitari's past lover's husband.

"Hm…how convenient." Said Taka, looking over Oshitari's shoulder.

"Yeah." Said Oshitari, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

"Well, I suppose that's all we need to put him behind bars." Momo concluded.

"You would THINK so." Said Oshitari, folding up the letter and putting it in his SECRET POCKET. "Let's find the other group."

They couldn't send off their flare because they were inside, but it's not like the other group could have responded to their flare because CURRENTLY…

They were ALSO in a shootout.

Atobe was of course standing up straight and firing directly at the bad guys. Just standing there taking shots as Inui and Eiji hid behind a large crate.

"What's with these groups?" said Eiji with a whine. "Why did you split us up this way?"

"I split up our power." Inui answered. "Since you don't have a weapon, you went with me because I have more weapons than Momo. Taka and Momo went together because they balance each other out. Atobe and Oshitari are interchangeable."

"So I'm deadweight?" Eiji said.

"Yes." Said Inui flatly. "And I have to work hard to compensate."

"Sorry I'm such a burden!" Eiji said angrily.

Atobe suddenly walked over to them and frowned. "Hello?" he said.

"Yeah?" they both looked up at him.

"Why didn't you help?" Atobe said.

"You were in a shootout." Said Inui. "We didn't want to interrupt."

"You have a gun." Atobe reminded him, pointing at the gun by his side.

"But it only has one shot in it." Inui said.

"What good is only having one shot?" said Eiji.

"I want to save it for something special." Inui replied.

"Whatever." Said Atobe. "We have to find something useful because I don't want to be known as that group that never found anything useful."

He then turned around only to be faced with Big Mac's biggest, ugliest thug. The thug had a large club in his hand and hit Atobe over the head with it. Atobe fell so spectacularly that it was IN SLOW MOTION, until he actually hit the floor, unconscious.

"Oh no!" said Eiji as he grabbed onto Inui for protection.

Inui pushed Eiji away, then stood up and fired his one shot at the thug.

The thug fell over on the ground.

"INUI!" said Eiji, jumping to his feet. "You just killed someone!"

Inui frowned. "I suppose." He said. "Why don't I feel any remorse?"

"This place is getting to all of us." Said Eiji. "Except for me. I would never kill anyone."

"Let's make sure that Atobe isn't bleeding or about to die or any—" Inui started as he turned around only to see Atobe standing up and brushing himself off.

"Hey!" said Eiji. "How are you okay? We just saw you hit the floor!"

"Don't move too much, you might have a concussion." Inui advised, trying to make Atobe lie back down.

"I'm fine." Said Atobe. "And I'm not just saying that. I really am okay."

"How?" said Inui skeptically.

"Well, I can be unconscious if it's convenient." Said Atobe. "But since I regained consciousness so quickly, it must mean that we have to run away from something and obviously it would be obnoxious if you guys had to carry me around."

"What would we have to run away from?" Eiji asked.

"I can distinctly hear ticking from the other side of the room consistently speeding up." Atobe said.

Eiji, Atobe and Inui all looked at each other and then tore off in the other direction as fast as they could and, as they dove out the door, the entire building exploded in a burst of fire and a mushroom cloud of course. The building sunk into the water and disappeared.

"Oh no!" said Eiji as he sat up and watched it sink. "Momo and Taka and Oshitari were in there!"

"No, we're all right." Came a voice, and sure enough, the other trio had managed to dive out of another door that just so happened to be handily situated for their escape.

"If Oshitari hadn't noticed that ticking, I don't know WHAT would have happened!" said Taka, standing up.

"Did you find anything?" Atobe asked Oshitari.

"A signed confession." Oshitari said. "Though I don't know if it will do us any good, considering we already knew that Big Mac committed the murder."

"Hm…yes…" said Atobe.

"Detectives."

They all stood up and whirled around to see Big Mac in all his glory surrounded by tons of his flunkies, all swinging chains or other form of weapon directly at our heroes.

"And…companions…" said Big Mac, eyeing the rest of the group.

"Big Mac!" said Atobe. "Surrender now and accept justice for all your crimes!"

"Never!" said Big Mac. "Attack!"

The ruffians charged towards the good guys.

"It has to be done." Said Inui, taking out his sword.

"Easy for you to say!" said Eiji. "I don't have a weapon!"

"Just stay by me, Eiji!" said Taka as he pulled out his sword and erupted into flames of course. "BURNING!"

The thugs came up to them and they all started fighting.

"Hey Inui!" Momo shouted as he sword fought against a thug with a large metal pole.

"What is it?" said Inui, preoccupied with his own opponent.

"Can you hear that?" Momo said.

"Our theme music?" Inui tried.

"Yeah!" said Momo. "It rocks! Music to fight by!"

Sure enough, even the Pirates at their own theme music. Music that played while they were sword fighting, while the Knights had music when they were riding, and the Detectives had music while they were…walking. Or whatever.

"Behind you, Taka!" said Eiji as he tried his best to stay out of harm's way. "Over here! Look this way!"

"Eiji, you're distracting me!" said Taka as he did his best to thwart the bad guys without killing any of them. That would horrify him.

"Avenge your horse, Taka!" said Eiji. "AVENGE YOUR HORSE!"

Atobe, in addition to being able to shoot a gun like a master and snap necks like it was his job (and it sort of was), he discovered that he was moderately skilled in close-range combat, as long as it looked badass enough. He found that as long as anything looked badass enough, he could essentially do it.

Oshitari, meanwhile, we sneaking up behind Big Mac, and when he was close enough, he shot all the flunkies that were around him. The flunkies fell dead right on the spot even if they were shot in the leg or whatever because having them alive would surely be troublesome. Oshitari grabbed Big Mac and held a gun up to his head.

Big Mac, needless to say, told all of his thugs to back off and stop fighting.

"You chose to do this the hard way a long time ago." Said Oshitari, caulking his gun.

Suddenly, one of the flunkies that everyone had assumed had been automatically dead had a little bit of fight left in him, raised his arm up off the floor and took one shot at Oshitari.

Oshitari dramatically crumpled to the ground in a heap.

"NOOOO!" Atobe yelled as he whipped out his gun and fired at Big Mac and then at the thug.

They both died as Atobe ran over to Oshitari to see if he was all right. All the thugs scattered, leaving everyone who was not a detective to just stand there in a huddle.

"Of course he's all right." Momo whispered to Taka. "Right? Didn't we go through this whole thing where they can't be shot?"

"Well, if it's dramatic enough then I suppose they can be shot." Inui said.

"What do you mean?" demanded Eiji. "If it's dramatic enough!"

"Atobe…" said Oshitari, reaching up to his Detective Friend. Of course, it was impossible to tell exactly where he had been shot, but we can all assume that wherever it was, it had been fatal.

"Oshitari, save your strength." Atobe urged him.

"I won't make it." Said Oshitari. "If you see Trixie…tell her that her husband's soul is finally at rest." His eyes rolled back in his head and he fell limp.

"Oshitari…no…" said Atobe, clenching his fist as the drizzle outside turned into pouring rain. "They've KILLED him!"

The others gasped…

JUST AS they were engulfed with white light.

"ALMOST perfect timing." Said Inui as he whipped out the remote. It was hard to be excited about being able to change Universes considering Oshitari had just…you know…died.

They appeared in the new world.

The first thing they noticed is that they were in the middle of a desert. A little old west town.

"The Old West!" said Eiji. "Cowboys and Indians! What a fun Universe!"

"Eiji." Said Taka. "Remember. Oshitari just died. We have to mourn his death before we do anything else."

"Oh right." Said Eiji, lowering his head.

They all stood there with their heads bowed, but happened to look up when they noticed Atobe and Oshitari both just standing there.

"Wait." Said Momo. "Didn't you just die, Oshitari?"

"Um…yeah." Said Oshitari. "I guess…it didn't really count."

"WHAT?" demanded everyone.

"Then that means…" Taka started. Then he turned around to see his horse just standing behind him being a horse. "MY HORSE!" He hugged his horse excitedly since it was very much alive.

"Well." Said Oshitari, putting his hands on his hips. "You seem to be more excited about the horse being alive than me being alive."

Taka looked embarrassed. "Well…I'm not gonna lie…" he started.

"Hey, you two are still in black and white!" said Eiji, pointing at the only ones who would obviously still be in black and white. "And where did our trench coats go?"

"What?" said Atobe, looking down at himself to see that he was, in fact, still in black and white. "That's annoying!"

"I suppose when we enter each Universe, everything resets." Inui said, pulling out his gun and looking at it to see the special single shot had returned.

"That's a helpful piece of information." Said Momo.

"Well, now that that's all squared away, let's figure out who we have to find in this Universe." Inui said, pulling out the remote control and looking off in the distance of the desert.


	12. Outlaw

Channel 12- Outlaw

The group of six sat around a table in the middle of a bar. They all had water or apple juice or some other type of beverage that was legal for them to drink at their young age.

"How long has it been since we first all got scattered?" Eiji asked.

"Well…" Inui said. "Let's see. Momo and I spent one night in Pirate Universe. One night in Knight Universe. One night in Detective Universe, and we just spent the night in the Old West, so this makes it the fifth day."

"Man!" said Momo. "This is so annoying!"

"Our parents are probably really worried about us." Said Taka woefully.

"I never even thought about that." Atobe admitted.

"When are we going to get our mission for this world?" Oshitari said.

"When we find the person or people who are in this Universe." Inui answered.

"When will we find them?" said Eiji.

"So far, we've always just so happened to bump into the people almost right off the bat!" said Momo. "They have to be somewhere in the town, don't they?"

"Not necessarily." Said Inui.

The six of them inhaled deeply, and exhaled helplessly.

That's when Eiji suddenly let out a loud gasp.

"What is it?" said Momo.

Eiji only pointed and got up from his seat so intensely that his chair fell down and smashed on the ground. The people around the bar stared, so the others tried to settle Eiji down because it's not like they looked THAT normal and the last thing they needed was questions from the locals.

Eiji went over to the wall where all the WANTED posters were. He ripped one of the posters off the wall and returned to the table.

He slammed the poster down in the middle of the table and moved his hand to the side.

At first, no one looked. Finally, Inui picked up the poster and looked at it.

"It's him." He said. "That second year from Rikkai Dai."

"Kirihara?" the others said.

Inui turned the poster around, and sure enough, there was Kirihara's hand drawn picture, except he looked sinister and was dressed as an outlaw. His name was underneath his picture, and he was worth twenty thousand dollars! (Which was a lot in those days, folks.)

"Twenty thousand?" said Taka. "That's a ton!"

"I don't get it!" said Momo. "Why are we all the good guys and he's a bad guy?"

"Well…I don't know." Said Inui.

"And I don't think we're really good." Oshitari said, pointing to himself and Atobe. "We're sort of anti-heroes."

"Sort of…but not really…" said Eiji. "I mean, you DID kill a lot of people, but I guess they were all bad people. Except that girl. She didn't do anything to you."

"And Mickey Two Times." Taka added.

"We're not in that Universe anymore so forget about it." Said Inui, standing up. "We have to find Kirihara wherever he is."

"He's an outlaw!" said Eiji, pointing at the picture as if Inui had just forgotten.

"He probably LIKES it." Said Atobe. "We should just leave him here."

"We can't." said Inui. "We have to find him so we can get the mission, remember?"

"Oh yeah." Said everyone.

"But what about the other guy?" Oshitari said.

"We'll start with finding Kirihara." Said Inui. "Perhaps he will know who the other person is. Perhaps he is another outlaw."

They scanned the outlaw posters, but unfortunately they were unsuccessful.

"Okay, scratch that." Said Inui. "I'll just leave it at perhaps Kirihara will know where the other person is."

"How are we going to find out where Kirihara is though?" Eiji said.

"Ask around of course!" Said Momo as he took the poster and then stood up on the table. "EXCUSE ME! EVERYONE! LOOK UP HERE!"

All the pleasant townsfolk looked up at Momo and he received many raised eyebrows because of his peculiar outfit.

"Has anyone seen this crazy outlaw?" Momo said, pointing at the picture. "This Kirihara guy?"

"DEAR GOD!" screeched the townsfolk as they all ran around frantically flailing their arms and knocking things over. They screamed warnings and dove under chairs and hid in the closet, jumped over the counter. Essentially they did whatever they could to cause a ruckus as the group of six only stood there with wide eyes.

Finally, once everyone was hidden, the bartender was the first to come out and approach them.

"What do you think you're doing?" said the bartender. "Get off the table! And why would you ever say that name in this town?"

Momo stepped down and looked at his companions who only shrugged.

"Is he really that evil?" said Momo.

The bartender shivered just thinking about it. "I shiver just thinking about it." The bartender said.

"But do you know where we might be able to find him?" said Inui. "You know, a secret lair. Or maybe a partner that lives in the town?"

"The Dreaded Kirihara always works alone." The bartender said. "And if you knew what was good for you, you wouldn't go after the bounty on his head. It's not worth it, I tell you! We've lost six good sheriffs to that guy!"

"Looks like he likes killing people almost as much as you guys." Eiji whispered to the detectives, but they elbowed him.

"So he comes into town." Inui inferred.

"Usually every Tuesday at noon." The bartender said. "But he didn't come last Tuesday. It was the strangest thing, but I'll be a danged fool if you find a single person in this town that was disappointed that he didn't show."

"What way does he leave?" Oshitari asked.

"The same way he always comes in." the bartender pointed forward. "He's got a place he stays at just north of our old town. But no one's ever been there and come back alive."

"Hm…" said Inui. "But…no one's gone there RECENTLY, I bet."

"No." said the bartender. "No one dares."

"So not in…the last five days or so?" Inui said.

"No." said the bartender. "I just said that."

"I see." Said Inui.

"I think it'd be best if you stepped out of here, strangers." Said the bartender.

"Of course." Said Atobe.

The group moseyed out and stood by the place where cowboys would tie up their horses while they go in the bar. Of course, Taka's horse was there, and they had to wait for him to untie him.

"So we know Kirihara has a lair just north of the village." Said Inui. "But I doubt he's wreaked any havoc recently. He's probably just been staying there, hoping he's not as crazy as he thinks he is."

"All the havoc he wreaked in the past was probably just his alternate universe self and not his REAL self." Said Eiji. "Unlike YOU TWO!"

Once again, he turned to Atobe and Oshitari who took turns slapping him.

"Hey!" said Eiji.

"Next time, it'll be a shot in the face." Atobe warned.

"You wouldn't shoot me!" said Eiji.

"You want to bet?" said Atobe as he whipped out his gun and pointed it at Eiji. "Everything resets after we go to the next Universe so you'll be fine. I just won't have to deal with you right now."

"Why are you guys letting him do this to me?" Eiji whined.

"All right, all right, that's enough." Said Taka, getting in between Oshitari and Eiji. "Eiji, you stop bringing up the fact that Atobe and Oshitari killed people. Atobe and Oshitari, you just stop killing people. That way, we're ALL happy!"

"Taka, your argument makes so much sense, but unfortunately I don't see any of them following up with your requests to make it work." Inui said.

"Can we just go to Kirihara's secret lair so we can get out of here?" Momo requested, trying to get everyone moving.

"Does anyone mind if I ride?" said Taka.

"Why would we mind?" said Eiji.

"I don't want anyone to be jealous." Said Taka.

"It's YOUR horse." Oshitari said.

"Well…I guess…" said Taka. "It's just that… I feel bad that you all have to walk. But all this armor is so heavy and hot that it's not comfortable to walk far distances in… and plus, I don't want any sand to get in it because I know that would just SO not feel good..."

"Taka, just ride your horse." Said Momo. "We really don't care if you do or don't."

"Okay, I will." Said Taka, still looking self-conscious and awkward as he climbed up on his horse. He looked ever so content that his horse was not dead like he had previously been.

"Let's go!" said Eiji cheerfully as he started walking off some random direction.

Everyone followed him because they didn't have anything else to do and they definitely didn't know better.

Then Inui whipped out his compass and paused.

"Everyone." He said.

They stopped and turned around.

"North is that way." Inui pointed in the opposite direction that everyone was walking.

They paused and looked at each other.

Then, dejectedly, they turned around and walked in the other direction, this time obediently following Inui.

"I hope it's not too far." Said Momo. "It's hot out here!"

"Try wearing a metal suit!" Taka said.

"Yeah well, you're riding." Momo pointed out.

"You said you didn't care!" Taka looked betrayed.

"I don't, really!" Momo assured him.

But now Taka was even MORE self-conscious and awkward.

"The bartender did say that it was only JUST NORTH of the town." Said Inui. "That means it can't be all that far away, especially if Kirihara makes the trip every Tuesday."

"You know what, guys?" said Eiji. "I bet he missed the trip this Tuesday because he didn't know he was supposed to come into the town and terrorize them on Tuesdays."

Everyone stared at Eiji as if he were an idiot.

"OBVIOUSLY." They all said.

"Well sorry!" said Eiji defensively. "How about one of you other guys start a conversation then? It might be a long walk for all we know!"

"We just have to stay north." Said Inui, checking back at his compass.

"That's not a conversation starter…" Eiji pouted.

And the small group then came to the end of the town. They took one look back at it as if they had any sort of emotional attachment, and went off into the desert. They hoped that all their assumptions about Kirihara's lack of evil behavior would be correct as they left completely unprepared for what might actually be ahead of them.


	13. Tuesday at Noon

Channel 13- Tuesday at Noon

The small band of unlikely heroes eventually did come across something interesting as midday rolled around. There was an assortment of caves and rocks up ahead, but the most promising thing of all was the set up outside of it that included a fire pit and various other things like that.

But, even more promising than the fire pit, there was a horse tied to a pole. An alive horse. This horse didn't look like Taka's, though, because it was clearly older and BROWN.

"Well…" said Inui, approaching the camp-like area. "I'm willing to guess that this is perhaps where we're SUPPOSED to find Kirihara."

"Theoretically." Said Oshitari as he whipped out a magnifying glass and leaned in to the fire pit. "But there hasn't been a fire here for at least three days."

"What does that mean?" Momo asked. "Does that mean he left?"

"Where would he go without his horse?" Taka said as if it were a crime.

"Let's inspect the area for any type of clue." Atobe suggested.

They all started exploring the surroundings but were unsuccessful in their search.

"All right, so much for that." Said Momo. "He probably took off."

Suddenly, Inui's pocket beeped once. Inui quizzically pulled the remote control out of his pocket to find the number had descended to 24.

"Well, would you look at that?" said Inui, showing everyone. "He's close by."

"HEY!" came a voice. They all spun around to see Kirihara standing there with two shotguns raised in their direction. His eyes were bloodshot and he looked quite enraged about their presence. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"It's just us!" Taka jumped off his horse and waved his arms.

Kirihara peered at them over the two guns.

"…Us?" he said.

"You know!" said Eiji. "We're all players from Seigaku and they're from Hyoutei, but that's no reason to hold anything against them!"

Atobe and Oshitari glared at Eiji.

First, Kirihara looked at the four members of Seigaku, and then the two of Hyoutei. They just so happened to be standing in such a fashion that would make it easy to look back and forth between them.

Then Kirihara slowly lowered his guns as his eyes settled on Atobe and Oshitari.

"Why are you two black and white?" he asked.

"We came from a Detective Universe—" Atobe started, but he was unable to finish his explanation because Kirihara suddenly collapsed in the sand.

Everyone looked at each other.

"He was just so happy to see us he fainted!" Momo concluded.

"Actually, I'm willing to bet it has something to do with dehydration mixed with heat exhaustion and insomnia." Inui said.

"AND he's happy to see us." Momo insisted.

So they went over to Kirihara and forced him to drink some water. Then they slapped him around a little bit so he'd wake up.

He did, but he was quite groggy and likely delusional as well, but his eyes weren't bloodshot anymore at least. But they were going to explain the situation to him and get the information, god damn it!

"Scattered across different alternate universes?" Kirihara gasped. "Yeah, I can buy that I guess. It's a good explanation as to why I suddenly appeared here, but there are a few things I don't get…"

"And what are those?" said Inui.

"How did you all get here?" said Kirihara. "I thought that I was doomed to this little campsite forever, cause every time I tried to leave I'd just get lost and just end up right back here."

"There's a small town just south." Said Eiji, pointing off the distance.

"You're alternate universe self has made quite a name." said Momo. "But you missed your Tuesday appointment of terrorizing them."

"That's because I didn't know where the stupid town was!" Kirihara said angrily. He was just about to keep ranting when he looked over to where Taka's horse just so happened to be standing right next to his own horse. "Hey! Whose horse is that?"

"That's my horse!" said Taka.

"Well tell him to keep it in his pants." Said Kirihara with a scowl.

"What are you talking about?" said Taka, looking confused.

"OBVIOUSLY Forehand is a GIRL HORSE." Said Kirihara.

"Forehand?" said Atobe.

"What a cute name!" exclaimed Eiji.

"My horse is obviously not thinking of anything like—" Taka started, but then he noticed that his horse and Forehand looked like they were definitely nuzzling AT THE LEAST.

"HEY HEY HEY!" said Kirihara. "I'm not going to tell you again!"

"All right…" Taka said, quickly getting to his feet and pulling his horse's reins away from Kirihara's horse.

"Taka, how come your horse doesn't have a cute name?" Eiji asked. "Does your horse even have a name?"

"Uh…well, I've just been calling him Horse…" Taka admitted.

"It's so uncreative that it might just be a little cute!" Eiji decided. "Horse and Forehand. A match made in heaven!"

"It is NOT a match made in heaven!" Kirihara said adamantly.

"Excuse me," said Oshitari. "But none of us are concerned about your horse and Taka's horse. Could we please get back on track so we can get out of here?"

"That's right." Said Inui. "Do you know of anyone else in this Universe that is originally from our Universe?"

"You mean besides you guys?" Kirihara shook his head. "You guys are the first people I've seen since I got here."

"I suppose that's a no, then." Inui sighed.

"Well, we're out of luck!" Taka said as he finished tying Horse up away from Forehand.

"Why?" Kirihara asked.

"Unless we have everyone collected from a Universe, we won't receive the mission that we're supposed to get in order to go to the next Universe." Inui explained, holding up the remote control.

Just as he did, it blinked and the screen changed.

Everyone leaned in as words formulated on the blank screen that obviously wasn't blank ANYMORE!

"Terrorize the town." They all read together because, BELIEVE IT OR NOT, they can all read.

"Terrorize the town?" Kirihara repeated.

"That must be our mission." Said Atobe.

"What a weird mission!" said Momo. "Looks like you get to have some fun before you leave, Kirihara?"

"And do what?" Kirihara said.

"Shoot things and people and call out the sheriff." Oshitari explained.

"But you don't have to shoot the people." Said Eiji, wincing and hiding behind Taka before Atobe or Oshitari even had a second to react.

"Why?" Kirihara still looked confused.

"In every Universe we receive a task that has something to do with what our alternate selves would actually be doing in the Universe." Inui said. "For example, Momo and I were in a Pirate Universe, so our task was to search for buried treasure. Taka and Eiji had to rescue a princess in their Knight Universe."

"But Taka did most of the rescuing." Said Eiji. "And now he's betrothed to marry her."

"But I'm not going to marry her so it doesn't matter!" Taka said.

"Well, you rescued her, and the king said that whoever rescued her got to marry her so that ONLY MEANS…" Eiji began but Taka got THAT LOOK so Eiji decided to be quiet. I don't know exactly what THAT LOOK is, but we can all assume it's super effective.

"But I don't want to do something hard like terrorize a town…" Kirihara whined.

"It seems as though…" Inui started as he paced. "Every time we receive a mission, the people who are present in the Universe must complete it, and the rest of us are only along for the ride."

"But we haven't even found the second person yet." Said Atobe.

"I suppose there doesn't necessarily have to be two people." Inui looked back at his remote.

"We already got the mission." Taka said. "Doesn't that mean we're all together?"

"That's what I thought." Inui sighed. "But now I'm not so sure."

"It figures I'D be all alone!" Kirihara said. "And now I have to do the mission by myself?"

"We'll be watching you and cheering you on." Said Eiji. "Now you should go off and terrorize those villagers like there's no tomorrow, and then we'll be on our way! It will be glorious, I tell you! Glorious!"

"Eiji is right." Said Inui. "You should just go in, terrorize them, and then we'll be able to leave."

"We've already wasted enough time in this Universe as it is." Oshitari commented, looking at his watch.

"Wait a second." Said Momo. "What if this mission will only work on Tuesdays at noon?"

They all waited for him to explain, but he only stood there acting like his inquiry was totally backed up by fact and reason.

"That was random." Kirihara said finally since no one else was saying it.

"No it's not!" said Momo. "When we talked to the bartender, you remember what he said? He said that the 'Dreaded Kirihara' usually comes in town on Tuesdays at noon and then leaves. You missed last Tuesday, so maybe you're supposed to terrorize them on a Tuesday at noon!"

"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." Said Oshitari.

"Aw man…" said Momo, sad that his idea had been shot down.

"Momo has a point." Inui said.

"Oh." Said Oshitari. "Never mind. Good call."

"Thanks!" Momo cheered for himself.

"So what day is it today?" said Kirihara. "It better be Monday or so help me."

Everyone looked at each other. It was easy to lose track of the days when hopping from Universe to Universe. Trust me. I've tried.

When Inui got tired to staring at everyone and waiting for someone to think up an answer, he checked the remote, pressed a few buttons and then waited. After a moment, the date and time popped up.

His face fell.

"What?" said Taka. "It's not Wednesday, is it?"

"Saturday." Inui answered.

"SATURDAY?" everyone screamed angrily.


	14. Sunday

Channel 14- Sunday

"Look, this probably isn't as bad as we're making it out to be. Sure, we have to spend a couple of days staked out in the desert as a bunch of outlaws, but look. We could practice terrorizing the village tomorrow and the day after to make sure we get it right on Tuesday so we don't end up having to spend another week here. Am I right?"

The others looked at Inui grumpily.

It was nighttime now, and they were all sitting around the fire with little to say to each other. For the most part, they were just frustrated that they couldn't do anything to leave for a while.

"At least you're not alone anymore, Kirihara." Taka said.

"Tell me about it." Said Kirihara with the biggest pout of them all. "But you guys gave me a bit of hope when you said that all I had to do was terrorize a village and then I could leave! You guys think it's annoying to have to stay for three days? I've already been here for five!"

"Stop complaining." Said Momo. "We've all been through our fair share of ordeals!"

"Yeah!" said Eiji, sitting up straight. "These two—"

He pointed at Oshitari and Atobe, but then he quickly withdrew his comment.

"I mean…yeah…" Eiji revised his statement.

Everyone sighed woefully.

"I wish we had some marshmallows." Momo mumbled as they stared at the crackling fire.

Suddenly, Atobe stood up and looked as though he was getting ready to leave.

"And where are you going?" Inui questioned.

"Back to the town." Atobe answered.

"Why are you doing that?" Inui said.

"Because it's almost time to sleep." Atobe replied. "And I'm not sleeping in HERE."

"We don't have any other choice." Kirihara said.

"YOU don't have any other choice." Atobe reminded him. "YOU'RE the outlaw. The villagers don't have anything against US."

"You can't leave!" Kirihara said, getting to his feet and glaring at Atobe. "If it were any of you in my situation, I would definitely stay!"

"Well that's YOU, isn't it?" said Atobe.

Atobe turned to leave, but Kirihara drew one of his dual guns and pointed it directly at the back of Atobe's head. All those still sitting gasped at this gesture as Atobe only stood there, knowing perfectly well without even having to look what was happening.

"Did you just draw your weapon?" Atobe said, even know, as previously stated, he knew perfectly well what had just happened.

"I did." Said Kirihara. "You're staying here with the rest of us."

"Kirihara," Taka whispered. "I don't know if you need to bother with pointing a gun at Atobe."

"Why?" said Kirihara.

"I can't be shot." Atobe answered, facing Kirihara so he was staring directly down the barrel of the gun. "It's impossible. I can't die."

"What's that supposed to mean?" demanded Kirihara.

"The Detectives can't die." Inui explained. "Especially at your hands, Kirihara."

"Why especially at my hands?" Kirihara was sounding more and more confused and infuriated.

"Because you're a bad guy, and we are the tragic heroes whose only flaw is our compassion for mankind." Oshitari answered as he stood up and drew his gun, pointing it at Kirihara.

Everyone else gasped again.

"Oh yeah?" Kirihara said as he drew his other gun and pointed it at Oshitari.

"This isn't a fight you want to get into, Kirihara." Momo warned.

Finally, Inui stood up. "All right." He said, walking over to where the three of them were all at gunpoint. "Everyone put your weapons down. This is getting ridiculous. Even though everything resets when we travel to the next Universe, it would be bad to kill anyone."

"Resets?" Kirihara repeated.

"You'd come back to life if they killed you." Inui said. "But killing Kirihara would be a bad thing because then he would be unable to terrorize the village, thus preventing us from ever being able to leave."

"Point taken." Oshitari said.

Inui put his hand over Oshitari's gun and lowered it for him when he was too slow in doing so.

"And Kirihara," Inui went on. "Killing these two would be stupid because their abilities would come in handy if we bumped into any trouble." He nodded at Kirihara who reluctantly lowered his guns as well.

"Fine." Said Kirihara as he sat back down. "I don't want you to stay here anyway!"

"Could have fooled me." Atobe said, rolling his eyes.

He took a few steps off in a random direction, looked around idiotically, and then he turned back to the group.

"Which way is south?" he asked. "Let me borrow your compass."

"If you go alone, Atobe, you will likely get lost in the desert and die." Inui said matter-of-factly as he pulled the compass out of his pocket and handed it to Atobe. Atobe took the compass, but he did wear a frown.

"You doubt me that much?" said Atobe.

"I doubt you can read a compass, that is what I doubt." Inui answered truthfully.

Atobe looked at the face of the compass, turned it around a few times and then gave an exasperated sigh, handing it back to Inui.

"I suppose I am staying here then." He established as he sat down.

The next morning…

Kirihara sat atop of Forehand with all of his partners in crime around him. The town was just over the next hill, and he was standing there trying to hype himself up.

"Okay, so let's go through the plan again." Kirihara said as he tied his bandana up like only outlaws know how.

"It's easy." Said Inui. "Ride into town, shoot your gun, yell empty threats, kill some people if you want, call out the sheriff and then leave."

"You make it sound like it's not that big of a deal!" said Kirihara, sounding noticeably whiny.

"But you don't have to kill a bunch of people." Eiji said.

"We'll be watching you from here and cheering." Taka assured him.

"Are you sure this is what I'm supposed to do?" Kirihara asked. "I've never really been into killing people. I don't know. It's just not my thing."

"Just don't be a dumbass and get it done." Said Oshitari.

"Fine…" Kirihara pulled out one of his guns and nodded at the group just as the clock struck noon.

He rode off, and everyone looked at each other.

"Well, if he does well, then we might end up being able to change Universes." Inui said. "Because the remote never explicitly told us that we had to terrorize the village on a Tuesday."

"But if we don't change Universes then we'll have to stay all day tomorrow and then try again on Tuesday." complained Momo.

"I'm sure he'll do fine." Taka said.

So they all stood there patiently, overlooking the town. They could see somewhat of a ruckus going on in the town, so they cheered because they figured Kirihara was getting the job done.

But more time passed than should have.

And pretty soon, it was getting late.

"Okay…where is he?" Eiji said, becoming bored. They peered at the town to see that there wasn't a ruckus anymore and things seemed relatively calm.

"Well, he didn't leave." Said Atobe. "We would have seen that."

"What could have happened?" Momo questioned.

"Eiji, go in there and see what happened." Inui said.

"Why me?" Eiji asked.

"Because your attire looks the most normal out of all of ours." Inui replied.

"Oh." Said Eiji, double checking to make sure and then going towards the village.

The first place he went was into the bar in which they had received the information on where to find Kirihara. Everyone looked merry and content, so he walked right up to the bartender.

"I remember you from the other day!" said the bartender, seeming jolly.

"Yeah!" said Eiji. Then he looked around. "So…what's everyone so cheerful about?"

"Today has been a glorious day!" exclaimed the bartender. "The Dreaded Kirihara came into our town earlier!"

"Why is that glorious?" Eiji interrupted.

"We were able to get him off his horse and, with the help of the young men in the town, our sheriff took him to the jailhouse!" the bartender said.

Eiji gasped.

The bartender blinked.

Eiji quickly collected himself. "That's…wonderful!" he tried.

"Yes." Said the bartender. "It is. We have waited for this day for so long!"

"And…what's going to happen to…?" Eiji led.

"Oh, he will be executed in the morning." The bartender answered.

"Aha." Said Eiji with a nod.

Quickly and quietly, Eiji exited the bar without saying anything, speed walking back out of the town back to where everyone was waiting. Eiji hastily explained the situation to them, and some were shocked, some were surprised, and others shook their heads with disappointment.

"Now what?" said Momo.

"Well, we'll have to break him out." Oshitari said. "And then regroup."

"Break him out of the jail?" Taka said. "Isn't there another way?"

"Can you think of one?" Oshitari said.

"Well no…" Taka admitted.

"It's not our fault that Kirihara was a pansy about terrorizing the village and now we have to bail him out." Said Momo. "Literally! But not really literally because we're not actually bailing him out. We're illegally breaking him out. But that's beside the point."

"Stop talking." Atobe ordered.

"We'll have to wait until night before we can do anything." Inui said, looking up at the sun. "It will be a few hours, but that will just give us enough time to develop a plan better than the one we gave Kirihara."


	15. Most Likely

Channel 15- Most Likely

"WHO THOUGHT UP THIS IDIOTIC PLAN?" Kirihara yelled as he and the rest of the group frantically ran away from the jail as the sheriff chased after them taking shots.

"Just keep running!" they all yelled back at him.

In the dark of the night and running through the desert, the group managed to lose track of the sheriff. The sheriff was disappointed with himself, but he didn't dare travel so far away from the town, especially in pursuit of a notorious criminal ALL BY HIMSELF, so he was forced to turn back.

But the group keep running and running and running until they reached the campsite in which they all collapsed from exhaustion, breathing deeply and clinging dearly to life.

"THAT DID NOT WORK OUT." Kirihara was the first to speak as he rolled over and sat up, holding out his hands that were still chained together. "And someone get these off me!"

"Is that anyway to thank us for rescuing you?" Momo said, looking offended.

"We just saved you from being executed in the morning!" Eiji added.

"Well, whose fault was it that I got captured in the first place?" Kirihara reminded them, as he continued to wave his arms around, hoping that someone would take a hint and do something about his chains.

"Yours?" Momo suggested.

"NOT MINE." Said Kirihara. "You guys were the ones who were like, oh yes, you'll be FINE if you just waltz into the town and act all CRAY-ZY and surely that will be good enough terrorizing! As if I know how to terrorize a town, let's get real here! Come on!"

"Here are your weapons." Said Eiji, handing Kirihara his belt that had the two guns in it.

"Give me that!" said Kirihara, tearing those away and looking BEYOND angry with everyone.

"Geez, no reason to bite my head off." Said Eiji, putting his hands in the air as if he was the victim.

Kirihara dropped his stuff to the ground and started stomping his feet in a very childish manner. Everyone was trying not to look at him, so he finally just yelled, "Hurry up and take these off!" in reference to the chains that they were all doing a pretty good job ignoring.

"Stop complaining so much." Said Atobe, brushing himself off.

"Your horse looks okay, Kirihara." Taka commented, making sure that Forehand didn't have any injuries.

"I told you that I wanted more space between your horse and Forehand!" Kirihara warned.

"Horse is being perfectly innocent." Said Taka, stroking his horse lovingly. "If anything, I think your horse is making the moves on HIM."

"She is not!" Kirihara argued.

But then he realized what he was arguing about and suddenly decided to throw a temper tantrum, once again waving his hands around in a frantic manner. "THESE ARE UNCOMFORTABLE! Get them off me! I don't want to have to demand it again!"

Inui pulled his sword out of his sheath and waited.

Kirihara delicately outstretched his arms and tried to situate himself as far away as possible, and with one swift motion, Inui cut the slack right down the middle.

"There!" said Kirihara, rubbing his wrists as the chains fell off. "Was that so hard?"

"Not at all." Inui said.

"What went wrong?" Oshitari asked. "In the terrorizing, I mean."

"You mean besides EVERYTHING?" Kirihara said angrily as he pouted.

"Start at the beginning." Inui instructed.

"Well, I rode in, and at first everything we going all right." Kirihara started. "Everyone was cowering in fear and stuff. And then I started shooting and stuff, but no matter where I shot, I always missed people."

"Were you intentionally missing people?" Momo asked.

"Well, at first." Kirihara said. "But then I realized that they weren't all that scared because I hadn't killed anyone yet."

"You killed someone!" Eiji gasped.

"No!" said Kirihara. Then he frowned. "Well…I TRIED…"

"YOU TRIED?" Eiji gasped again, sounding even MORE shocked and offended than before.

"All my shots missed!" Kirihara tried to explain. "No matter how close I was, I just missed! Then I finally had the sheriff right in front of me and I ran out of bullets!"

"Ran out of bullets?" Oshitari and Atobe said quizzically and at the same time.

"Yeah!" said Kirihara. "My guns just went 'click click'. Both of them did! At the same time! You know?"

"Not really…" Oshitari and Atobe admitted.

"So that's when everyone ganged up on me." Kirihara said.

"They realized your moment of weakness?" Inui said.

"Pretty much." Said Kirihara. "I guess it was pretty obvious to them that I was having an 'off day'."

Kirihara did extremely exaggerated quotations with his fingers.

"They took advantage of the fact that I had no more bullets and someone threw a rock at me that knocked me off my horse." Kirihara went on, rubbing the back of his head in painful remembrance of that moment. "I didn't know what the hell I was doing."

"It sounds like you need to learn out to shoot a gun." Said Atobe.

"And ride a horse." Taka nodded.

"Maybe…" Kirihara said. "Or maybe I'm just not cut out for this alternate Universe."

"Obviously." Inui said. "You're meant to be in a Universe where you play tennis, not where you're an outlaw that terrorizes towns."

"Good point." Kirihara nodded.

Everyone sadly realized that they were not playing tennis, and hadn't been playing tennis in a long time.

"So let's practice your shot." Said Atobe, pulling Kirihara to his feet.

"Right now?" Kirihara demanded, wrenching himself away from Atobe.

"Yes right now." Said Atobe. "You have to get it right so you can terrorize the village at noon."

"But it's nighttime!" said Kirihara.

"Well, it's almost morning." Taka observed.

"All right, I'll give you that one." Said Kirihara as he looked off in the distance to see the sun rising. "But I don't have anymore bullets, remember?" Kirihara picked up his gun and pulled the trigger while it was pointed at the air.

Much to everyone's complete and utter surprise, a gunshot fired and they hit the deck for obvious safety reasons.

They all paused a moment, and slowly stood back up.

"Okay…maybe I DO have bullets…" Kirihara said, looking at his gun with a confused expression.

"You should practice." Inui decided, guiding Kirihara's face away from… you know. That place where all the bullets come out.

"So let's practice." Said Atobe to Kirihara.

"Fine." Said Kirihara, frowning in an overly animated fashion.

"You." said Atobe, pointing at Taka. "Stand over there."

"…Why…?" Taka said, looking nervous.

"Because your armor can withstand bullets." Atobe reminded him. "You didn't die that time you were shot with a machine gun and these guns are weaker anyway. You should be fine."

"I don't want to be shot at." Taka said. "Can't you shoot at a cactus or something?"

"No, because we want him to hit people, not cacti." Atobe answered.

"Just do it, Taka." Said Inui. "If you end up dying, you'll just be resurrected when we jump to the next Universe."

"That's not reassuring!" Taka said, but he grabbed his helmet and stood in the spot Atobe instructed him to stand in anyway. Just because he's THAT awkward and THAT willing to please.

"So shoot him." Atobe said to Kirihara.

Kirihara raised one of the guns and took a shot at Taka, but for some reason, the bullet hit the ground right in front of him. He took another shot, though it happened again.

He took some frustrated rapid fire shots, but only continued to fling up dirt. But the funny thing was, no matter how many shots he took, he didn't seem to run out of bullets.

"I understand." Inui stood up. "It's the old 'Dance, Dance' shots."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kirihara said.

"You know in those Old West movies?" Eiji jumped out and held imaginary guns and started to pretend to shoot at the ground in front of Kirihara's feet while lowering his voice with a rasp the best he could. "Dance, dance! Har har har! I'm evil and this is all I do!"

"I suppose that's all your character can do." Said Inui.

"WHAT?" demanded Kirihara. "That's the dumbest thing yet! What good is that?"

"And your gun running out of bullets just as you cornered the sheriff…" Inui went on to himself. "I suppose that always happens in those Old West movies as well. Because you can't very well defeat the sheriff, because then where would the movie go?"

"So I'm set up to lose." Kirihara decided. "Okay, so how am I supposed to terrorize the village if I'm set up to lose?"

"With our help." Atobe said, whipping out his gun and taking a shot at Taka.

But, for some odd reason, Taka was not hit.

Instead, Kirihara, who was standing right next to Atobe, was suddenly knocked off his feet.

Everyone stared at Kirihara as he sat up, looked confused and then winced, grabbing his shoulder.

Taka took off his helmet and crept over as well.

Kirihara looked at his hand that he had put on his arm to see blood.

Slowly, his eyes moved up to Atobe.

"You…SHOT me!" he said.

Atobe looked at his gun quizzically.

"You shot me!" Kirihara repeated. "I can't believe…you shot me!"

He looked at his hand again, and then at his arm.

"He shot me!" he continued, pointing at Atobe.

"I wasn't even pointing the gun at him." Atobe said.

"He…he shot me!" Kirihara said, and then he took another look at his hand that had the blood on it. "This is…my blood! I can't believe he—he shot me!"

Kirihara then put the back of his hand to his forehead and fainted with a wussy little, "Ohhh…"

"How did that just happen?" Eiji asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I have no idea." Said Atobe.

Everyone looked at Atobe and then slowly backed away from him.

"Wait." Said Inui, stepping above it all of course. "As was said before. Atobe and Oshitari's shots never miss."

"But I wasn't aiming at him." Atobe reminded him.

"Well, I suppose the shot went towards a bad guy." Inui said. "And Taka, being a knight, did not fit the description of one you would be likely to shoot. Kirihara, on the other hand, did."

"So are you saying that my shots will gravitate towards whoever is 'most evil' despite who I am aiming at?" Atobe questioned.

"Not 'most evil' necessarily." Inui said. "Just 'most likely'."

"That's dumb!" said Eiji. "That shouldn't happen!"

"Apparently it does happen." Inui said. "So therefore the two of you should be careful about shooting anyone while Kirihara is around."

"Wait, Inui." Said Momo. "Couldn't that easily be one of us too? Cause pirates could be considered bad guys, right?"

"That's true." Said Inui. "So be careful about shooting anyone while the two of us are around as well."

"Wait…how come we haven't been shot yet?" Momo asked.

"Because, I suppose, there has always been someone around who would more likely be shot than the two of us." Inui said.

"Hey guys?" said Taka. "Don't you think we should do something about the fact that Kirihara's lying here in the middle of a desert with a bleeding open wound that's probably getting infected in the sand like this?"

Everyone looked at Taka and then down at Kirihara who was doing exactly what Taka had just said.

"Good call." They all said.

They didn't have a hard time all working together carrying Kirihara into one of the little caves that happened to be there. But when it came down to doing something about the wound, everyone sort of just looked at each other blankly.

"Does anyone have any experience with gunshot wounds?" Momo asked.

"No." everyone answered immediately.

"Does…anyone's alternate universe selves have any experience with gunshot wounds?" Momo tried.

They thought a little bit more before answering this time.

"We leave those with gunshot wounds as dead." Inui said to Momo.

"Ah yes." Momo nodded.

"If someone has a gunshot wound in our world, it means we put it there, so obviously we want it there." Oshitari said.

"Or it's one of our comrade's, and it's likely fatal by the time we reach him." Atobe pointed out.

"There are no guns in our Universe." Taka said.

"So that's a big no." Eiji finished up.


	16. The Plan

Channel 16- The Plan

When the bright circle affectionately dubbed "The Sun" by most humans passed across the sky and comfortably sat on the horizon, Kirihara's eyes flickered slightly.

He expected to see the sky, but all he could see was the inside of the cave he was lying inside of.

He looked down to see that his shirt had been removed and was folded next to him.

His initial thought was, "AHHHHH! I'VE BEEN RAPED!"

So he started to sit up, though he had to stop when he was reminded of the siring pain in his shoulder. He looked at the spot that was paining him so to discover that he did have a bandage right there.

So his second thought was, "AHHHHH! I'VE BEEN SHOT!"

The second seemed more likely, however, so he sat up more slowly and grabbed his shirt. He started to put it on, whining loudly and pathetically the whole time but not stopping.

His endless and loud whining, of course, caused the others to enter.

"So you're awake." Inui concluded.

"Yes I am!" said Kirihara, still in his whiny voice. And then he pointed at Atobe with his GOOD arm. "I don't want him anywhere near me! He can go back to the town for all I care!"

Atobe ACTUALLY looked apologetic. But not apologetic enough to apologize.

"We've already established that it was an accident when he shot you." Inui said.

"Some accident!" said Kirihara. "Like I believe that!"

"Besides, everything will reset and your gunshot wound will disappear when we go to another Universe." Oshitari said.

"How do you know?" Kirihara whimpered, rubbing his shoulder tenderly.

"Well, I was shot and killed but I came back to life." Oshitari said as if that sort of thing happened all the time.

"So was my horse!" Taka piped in.

"Speaking of which, I hope your dumb horse didn't go near mine when I wasn't around to make sure he didn't!" Kirihara warned.

"Don't call my horse dumb!" said Taka.

"Could we not start right in on the senseless arguing?" Eiji pleaded. "You seriously JUST woke up and you're already getting all overprotective and possessive over a horse you hardly know."

"And we have to leave nice and early tomorrow morning to make sure you get to the town at noon." Momo went on. "So you can terrorize them properly and we can get out of here."

"Terrorize them properly?" Kirihara practically screamed out of what seemed like utter disgust. "What is THAT supposed to mean?"

"You know, not let them get the best of you and throw you in jail?" Momo tried.

"If I failed so miserably LAST TIME what makes you guys think I'll do any better with a gunshot wound?" Kirihara demanded. "I can hardly move this arm so I'm willing to bet I couldn't hold a gun, and I highly doubt I'll be able to ride a horse if I can't move this arm and I have to hold a gun with this arm."

"Stop, enough." Inui ordered. "I thought up a plan for tomorrow."

"A plan?" said Kirihara. "Why am I NOT relieved?"

"I don't know." Said Inui. "Why not?"

"Because your last plan was terrible!" Kirihara reminded him.

"My last plan wasn't really a plan." Inui said. "I was just throwing you into the mix so I could test the villagers in preparation for today so I could figure out the best way to terrorize them today."

"Really, Inui?" said Eiji, his eyes lighting up.

"Yes." Said Inui.

"No way." Said Atobe. "That's a lie."

"You want to bet?" Inui said.

"No." said Atobe, crossing his arms and turning away. You could tell he was just jealous.

"I would have appreciated you telling me that." Said Kirihara. "So I wouldn't have felt like such an idiot."

He frowned as he sat there with everyone staring at him.

"My shoulder hurts…" he complained.

"I swear, Kirihara, you've done nothing except complain since we got here." Said Momo.

"OH HAVE I?" said Kirihara angrily. "Well let's think of all the things you guys have put me through, shall we?"

"Naw, I'm all set." Momo shrugged.

"Everyone be quiet." Inui said. "I don't want to have to explain this plan more the once, and in order for it to work, we need everyone to do their parts. And I mean everyone."

"Even me?" said Eiji.

"Yes." Said Inui. "When I said EVERYONE…"

"I know, but I figured you were excluding me because I don't have a weapon." Eiji explained.

Inui paused for a moment and then he nodded.

"Oh right." He said. "You ARE excluded. I pretty much forgot about that. You don't mind, do you?"

"No…I don't mind…" Eiji said, looking away and clenching his fist, while muttering, "Strong Eiji! Strong Eiji!" and trying to keep himself from crying about his uselessness.

"He could use one of my guns." Kirihara offered. "I can't use one of them anyway. Actually, I can't really use either of them since it's in my character design to always miss or run out of bullets at a time that's convenient for the hero."

"That's a good point." Said Inui. "But you still have to have them so you can at least look threatening. And you have to put on a show and not let any of the townsfolk know that you're injured or else they probably won't fear you anymore."

"Oh." Said Kirihara and Eiji, BOTH looking disappointed.

"All right, everyone listen up." Said Inui as everyone leaned in, and then the whispering began.

That night, Kirihara went to sleep early. Atobe and Oshitari went off to pretend to smoke, leaving the four remaining members of Seigaku sitting around the fire looking wistful.

(And no, you're not going to find out what the plan is right now.)

"This makes it a week, doesn't it?" Momo sighed.

"Yes, a week." Inui said.

"I thought it was confusing enough to just be on my own for a day." Taka admitted. "I feel bad for those twenty-four other people who are still out there in other Universes."

"I hope there aren't a lot of people who are by themselves like Kirihara was." Eiji said. "The thing that made it all less stressful was being with someone you knew, right?"

"I think that's the only way we've all been keeping our sanity." Said Momo.

"I wonder where Tezuka is." Said Inui. "What kind of Universe is he in, I mean."

"And Oishi!" Eiji added. "I miss Oishi. I don't think I've ever gone this long without at least talking to him!"

They all stared at him.

"Seriously Eiji, it's been a week." Said Momo.

"I know!" said Eiji. "Exactly!"

Everyone sighed and didn't know exactly how to start the conversation again after that one.

"I'm sure Fuji is fine wherever he is." Taka said, trying to do so.

"And Kaidou." Said Momo.

Then they all stared at each other, counting up the names in their heads.

"Ryoma." Inui said finally.

"Oh right." Said the rest.

"I'm sure he's fine too." Momo said.

"As long as wherever he is has tennis, he'll definitely be fine!" said Eiji.

"What are the chances that he'll have tennis wherever he is?" said Momo. "None of us have had tennis so far."

"The chances are very slim." Inui answered as if that hadn't been a rhetorical question.

"How much longer would you say this is going to take?" Taka asked of Inui, since Inui's the kind of guy to ask questions like that.

"This?" Inui inquired.

"You know, collecting up the remaining twenty-four people." Taka replied.

"Well…" Inui paused a moment and looked up at the night sky. "It's about to take me eight days to collect five people."

"Eight days…five people?" Momo interrupted. "Excuse me. But there's seven people. And it's only been seven days. One day a person. So only twenty-four more days if we keep it up like this, and we'll probably just keep getting better at it."

"Actually, that's wrong." Inui said. "If you think about it. You and I started out in a world together and we started the search so we don't count ourselves. We will not be leaving this world until tomorrow, which will be the eighth day. Hence, it took us eight days to collect five people."

Momo opened his mouth to argue, but Taka put his hand up.

"Don't bother." He advised.

"Fine…" said Momo, pouting. "How long will it take then?"

"If we keep up at this pace… approximately thirty-eight days." Inui replied.

If the others had been drinking something at the time, it's likely they would have spit it all over the place.

"That's over a month!" said Momo. "Plus the seven days we've already been gone! Our parents are going to think we're dead! And they're gonna think it's a huge conspiracy or something!"

"But that's only assuming we continue at this pace." Inui said. "Because I have also noticed it has taken us increasingly longer to complete each mission with each Universe we go to."

"I don't think I want to hear about this…" Eiji said, putting his head in his hands.

"It took us only one full day to complete the mission in the Pirate Universe." Inui began anyway, even though it was certainly apparent that no one really wanted to listen to his statistics. "A day and a half in the Knight Universe. Granted, only a day in the Detective Universe was a lucky break for us, but it will have taken us four days to complete the Old West Universe mission, assuming everything goes to plan."

"What do you mean?" demanded Momo. "Assuming everything goes to plan?"

"Well, if we mess up tomorrow, then we'll have to wait another entire week for Tuesday." Inui answered as if that sort of thing was totally okay.

"That's a lot of pressure…" Taka said with a heavy sigh.

Inui must have noticed that morale was at an all time low, because he hastily cleared his throat and followed up with, "But I'm sure we'll do fine. My plan is fool-proof."

"We can only hope." Said Momo.

That's when Atobe and Oshitari returned.

"What were you all talking about?" Oshitari said.

"We were just trying to figure out how long it's going to take to collect up the remaining people." Taka replied politely.

"I wonder if anyone else from Hyoutei has been affected by this ridiculous experiment of yours." Said Atobe, sitting down and crossing his legs delicately.

"Well, I assumed that it was a given." Inui said. "With the two of you here after all."

"Why with the two of us here?" said Atobe with a raised eyebrow. "Why would that mean our tennis team is affected? It could have been random, couldn't it have been?"

"I suppose." Said Inui. "That is always a possibility. But we have yet to meet up with anyone who DOESN'T play tennis."

"That's true." Atobe nodded. "In that case, I think it's important that we make sure to collect every single person."

"It's important to do that even if no one else from Hyoutei has been affected." Eiji frowned.

"Right." Said Atobe, but he didn't sound terribly convincing. Though it's not like he cared if he sounded convincing enough. "Of course."

"Are you sure you'll be all right to stand by the horses tomorrow, Eiji?" Momo asked randomly.

Eiji nodded. "I'll give it everything I've got to keep them from breeding while Kirihara's back is turned!" he announced.

Once again, if Taka had been drinking something, he would have spit it out. "What are you talking about?" he said. "My horse definitely isn't thinking about that kind of thing!"

"He isn't?" said Eiji. "Of course he is. Just look at them." He pointed over at the two sleeping horses that were right next to each other. "They're a match made in heaven. She's a girl and he's a boy. Perfect."

"Aw man…" Taka looked over at them. "Kirihara will kill me…"


	17. The Story

Channel 17- The Story

"_You can't end the story. If you kill someone or blow up a building or anything that is final, then the story is over, and it is clear that that is why you failed last time. You must do something to perpetuate the story, so you don't win, but of course you also don't necessarily lose. The village will be terrorized, but most importantly, the story will continue."_

Kirihara didn't know exactly what Inui meant by "the story", but nevertheless, he stood at the edge of the town with as much confidence as he could muster. They told him to go into the street, and to be sure not to let anyone know about his injury.

Still, he was pretty sure that, in the real world, people with gunshot wounds didn't get up and walk around. He was also quite sure that they generally didn't terrorize villages, and with every step, he could feel himself instinctively wince even though he tried not to.

He looked over at Eiji standing behind him with the two horses. Eiji gave him the thumbs up as he turned back around, glancing briefly at the window in the bank to see Inui waiting for him to make the move. Atobe and Oshitari were observing him from the roof of the jailhouse while Taka was sitting on the bench outside the bar.

"I'll be fine." Momo said to himself as he stood outside the bar, staring at the swinging doors.

"Momo, you've got the easiest part out of all of us." Taka smiled.

"Easy for you to say!" Momo said as he took a deep breath and looked back at Kirihara who nodded, not looking terribly ready, but as ready as he was going to look.

"Let's go." Said Taka, nodding at Kirihara as well.

Momo then flung open the doors to the bar and walked in, hiding Kirihara's hat behind his back.

"_The people gather in the bar prior to Kirihara's arrival. Most of the able bodied fighters will be in there awaiting twelve o'clock."_

"GOOD NEWS!" Momo exclaimed.

Everyone stared at him as he walked right up to the bar and sat down.

"What's this all about, stranger?" said the bartender.

"That poster you got hanging behind the counter there?" Momo gestured towards the WANTED poster with Kirihara's face on it that was behind the bartender. "I think you can take it down."

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?" gasped everyone as they ran over.

Momo raised his hand and showed them the hat.

"This is…surely…!" said one of the young men as the grabbed the hat and awed at it.

"Strike up the band!" said Momo as he jumped up on the chair. "Kirihara's dead and now is the time for a celebration!"

"YEEEEEEE-HAW!" shrieked everyone as they immediately started partying and screaming and playing the piano.

Taka leaned over and peaked in the door and then signaled to Kirihara who was standing right outside the jailhouse.

"Sheriff." Kirihara said in a voice that was commanding, but still on the quiet side just in case the party wasn't quite loud enough. "I'm calling you out."

There was silence for a little bit, until the doors to the jail slowly opened. The sheriff was standing there, and he made his way outside and down the steps with a CHINK with every step he took.

"So you came back." Said the sheriff.

"Yeah." Said Kirihara. "I want to have a fair man-to-man fight. No guns. This'll settle it once and for all."

Kirihara removed the two guns from his belt and threw them to the ground.

"What are you trying to pull?" said the sheriff as he put his hand on his gun.

"Nothing." Said Kirihara. "I already told you what I want."

Up on the roof of the jailhouse, Atobe and Oshitari were both observing.

"What if the sheriff turns out to be an honorable man?" Oshitari asked. "What if he throws his guns aside too? There's no way Kirihara would win in a man-to-man fight, especially with that gunshot wound."

"Well, Inui says he knows for sure the sheriff will not give in." Atobe said.

"How could he know for sure?" Oshitari questioned.

"He said there were factors." Atobe replied. "Something about the sheriff's frustration and dishonor or something, but I stopped listening because I didn't really care."

"_The sheriff will be bent out of shape that Kirihara managed to escape the prison the other night, and he also has the death of six other sheriff's on his shoulders. If Kirihara throws his weapons to the ground, the sheriff will take his opportunity."_

Oshitari sighed. "What if Inui's theory is wrong?"

"About the sheriff?" Atobe said.

"No, about that whole 'most likely' thing." Oshitari replied.

"_If Kirihara is disarmed and the sheriff is taking a shot at him, the one who appears to be the evil one is the sheriff. Your shots that seem to be homing in on the most evil person will direct towards the sheriff who is shooting maliciously at an honorable unarmed man."_

"That's why YOU'RE taking the shot, Oshitari." Atobe answered.

"I suppose." Oshitari said, taking out his gun and pointing it at the sheriff.

On the ground, the sheriff reached for his gun.

Kirihara waited patiently, stealing a glance over at Taka who was moving closer to where he was standing.

"You were a fool." The sheriff said.

"A fool?" Kirihara said.

"You threw your weapons down before I agreed to the terms." The sheriff pointed out, pointing his gun directly at Kirihara.

"So I did." Kirihara nodded.

"I'll kill you here and now." Said the sheriff.

"What about your honor?" Kirihara asked.

"I'll be honored after you're finally killed so this town isn't plagued by you anymore!" said the sheriff. "Any last words?"

"…No, I'm all set." Kirihara said, closing his eyes tightly.

The sheriff took a deep breath and took a shot.

The bullet sailed through the air right towards Kirihara, but at the very last second, Taka practically leveled Kirihara like a football player and knocked him to the ground.

The sheriff didn't have to be shocked by Taka's sudden appearance because there was another gunshot and he suddenly clutched his leg and fell to the ground as well, writhing in pain.

"It actually worked." Said Oshitari, peering over the edge of the building, and then looking back to Atobe.

Atobe slapped him five.

"OW OW OW!" whined Kirihara as Taka stood back up. "Did you have to be so rough? I think you broke every bone in my body, and not to mention you aggravated by shoulder wound!"

"AND I saved you from being shot in the chest." Taka rolled his eyes.

"I'll get you yet!" the sheriff waved his fist angrily at Kirihara.

Apparently, the sound of the two gunshots was enough to interrupt the party that was going on at the bar. Everyone filed out and swarmed around the area as Momo tried to slink away.

Taka helped Kirihara to his feet as Inui calmly exited the bank.

"_The most important thing to do is to choose a person that would anger and affect the entire village, so they will be thoroughly terrorized." _Inui thought to himself as he crossed the street and grabbed the hand of the closest small girl he could find, just as Eiji came riding into down mounted on top of Kirihara's GIRL horse.

Eiji hopped off and the two of them got Kirihara up on top of the horse just as Inui walked over with the small girl.

"MY BABY!" shrieked a random woman from the crowd who had only just then noticed that Inui had kidnapped her daughter.

"Go already." Inui ordered as they put the girl on the horse as well.

"All right all right!" said Kirihara as if Inui had been telling him to go for an hour OR MORE.

Kirihara rode off as the little girl called back to her mommy. Some people chased after the outlaw and his prisoner, but they were unable to catch up with his speed.

It was very dramatic back at the town and Momo quickly separated himself from the crowd and went over to where his pals were all standing.

Oshitari and Atobe came down from their positions on the roof to congratulate everyone on a job well down.

"I think that went well." Eiji said, crossing his arms and nodding. "And by the way, Inui, thanks for changing everything at the last minute so I could get a chance to do something."

"Well, even if it was mundane and we could have had Kirihara ride in or someone else hold the horse, I felt bad for leaving you out." Inui said.

They stood there silently.

"Okay, so how long does that thing usually take?" Oshitari said, looking over his shoulder to see that the townsfolk were all slowly and menacingly approaching the group.

Inui pulled out the remote control and waited for a few moments, still staring at the mission that was on the screen.

"They're terrorized enough!" said Momo, sounding appalled as he looked over Inui's shoulder.

But, just when they were all ready to run like the dickens, the screen abruptly changed so it stated, "Complete".

They were all engulfed by white light just as the villagers jumped upon them.

"What a relief!" said Taka as the white light cleared and they were thankfully not surrounded by villagers.

Oshitari sighed as he looked at himself. "Still black and white…" he said mournfully.

They waited a second or two, and Kirihara suddenly came riding back with Taka's horse following behind him.

"Hey, you got to keep your horse too!" said Taka, looking SO excited.

"I almost wish she could have stayed behind so she didn't have to have your horse chasing after her." Said Kirihara as he pushed his collar aside and looked down at his shoulder. He nodded satisfyingly and looked back at Atobe. "You're lucky."

"Oh?" said Atobe and surely if he had been given the chance, he would have said something more intelligent.

Unfortunately, he was interrupted by Eiji yawning very loud and flamboyantly as he gazed around at his surroundings. "My stars!" he said. "I wonder wherever we are this time around?"

"Well…" Inui said as he looked around as well. They were in the middle of a city that had many tall skyscrapers and lots of people, considering it was about midday and all. "We seem to be in relatively modern times."

"Good!" said Momo. "Everything we've been to so far has been so extreme and in the past and other annoying stuff like that. I want to take a hot shower!"

"Yeah…" the others agreed.

"Wait." Said Inui as he walked over to a store and looked in the window and pointed at a newspaper that was on display.

The odd group looked over as well.

"1980." Oshitari read. "Well, that's not SO bad."

They took a second look around and realized that they DID appear to be somewhat in the past, but not enough for them to be all like: OMFG WTF like when they were in Knight Universe.

"I wonder what the theme of this Universe is." Said Taka. "And who will be in it!"

"The only way for us to find out is to start looking around." Inui said.

"I hope Oishi's here!" said Eiji.

When they turned around, they discovered that pretty much everyone was staring at them. Well, wouldn't you be? Consider what they're wearing, and the fact that there were two horses.

"Hey guys, wait a second!" said Kirihara, pointing back at the newspapers.

The others gladly turned their backs to the nosey people.

"Take a look at the article." Kirihara ordered.

"_Silver Pair_ saves Metrothum again." Inui said.

"The picture is too difficult to make out." Momo said, trying to see it at another angle.

"_Silver Pair_?" said Taka confusedly.

"Shishido and Ootori." Atobe and Oshitari said at the same time.


	18. The Silver Pair

Channel 18- The Silver Pair

"Okay, so this makes total sense." Said Taka, putting his hands on his hips as the group staked out in front of a telephone booth. "I mean, we're in 1980, and I guess THIS Universe is a Universe in which Shishido and Ootori are super heroes?"

"We're only assuming that." Oshitari said. "For all we know, it could be a random pair of super heroes who happen to call themselves the Silver Pair."

"But the likelihood of that is…not." Said Atobe.

"I couldn't have said it better myself." Said Inui.

"So we're essentially just waiting here until they happen to walk by?" said Momo.

"Hel-LO?" said Eiji, pointing at the phone booth. "Do you NOT see the phone booth? That's where they change into their super hero forms!"

"Just because Superman did it that way doesn't mean the Silver Pair does too." Taka said, looking bored. "And besides, they're not going to have to change unless there's some kind of trouble going on."

"We've been here for hours." Said Kirihara. "What if they don't ever come by here?"

"Look," said Inui. "This is the phone booth right outside the news station where all the newspapers are written by obnoxious reporters. Of course they would come by here."

"I still think there needs to be trouble for them to change." Said Taka.

"You're right." Said Atobe, reaching for his gun and drawing it, pointing it at Taka.

But before he could shoot, Kirihara jumped him and knocked him to the ground.

"Don't you dare." He said threateningly.

"I almost forgot." Said Atobe.

Then he looked back at Kirihara.

"Get off me." He said, his eyes narrowing.

"Give me the gun so I know you won't shoot it." Kirihara said.

"If you don't get off me, I'll pull the trigger." Atobe said.

Kirihara grumbled and got off Atobe. Atobe stood up and pocketed the gun.

"Hey guys," said Momo as he came walking over with a newspaper. "I'm back now."

"When did you leave?" questioned Inui.

"Oh…um…about fifteen minutes ago?" Momo suggested as he sat down and opened up the newspaper. "I wanted to read the article about the Silver Pair. Maybe we'll find out more about them and where to find them.

"Good idea." Inui said.

"Really?" said Momo, beaming.

"Yes." Said Inui, holding up his own copy of the newspaper. "But I did it like three hours ago."

Momo frowned. "Well fine." He said, opening up the paper.

Everyone who hadn't already read the article leaned over to read.

"I swear, anyone who's crazy enough to run around in a cape is just as dumb as anyone who's willing to oppose him." Came one voice.

"Oh, I don't know." Said another. "Where would anyone in this city be without them?"

Momo slowly lowered the paper and looked up.

Everyone else had been hidden behind the paper watched as two people walked by, hardly noticing them. Clearly they were involved in a very interesting conversation about the Silver Pair, and had just exited the news station.

"Shishido? Ootori?" called Atobe.

Inui looked at his remote control as the number changed from a 24 to a nice healthy 22.

The two stopped walking.

Then turned.

At first, Atobe was pretty sure he had just made a mistake because these two, although initially they looked like Shishido and Choutarou, did not look like them whence they turned. Both had their hair slicked to the side, were wearing glasses and had on respectable suits and ties, carrying their briefcases and papers very awkwardly as if they had just dropped them and had worked frantically to pick them back up.

"Atobe?" they both said.

"Oh, it IS you two." Said Atobe with a nod.

Choutarou dropped his briefcase and papers and threw his hands over his mouth. "And Oshitari!" he exclaimed excitedly. "And a bunch of other people that we sort of know!"

"We were starting to think we were alone here!" said Shishido as he dropped his stuff too and they both ran over to where the group was.

"How long have you been here?" Choutarou asked.

"And…what the hell are you all wearing?" Shishido followed up.

Inui then proceeded to explain all the details that the two of them deserved, and when he finished, Inui turned it around and started asking the questions himself.

"So you two are here in this Super Hero Universe." Said Inui. "In which you two are the superheroes, am I right?"

Shishido and Choutarou looked at each other and then raised their eyebrows at Inui.

"What?" Shishido said. "Us?"

"Obviously!" said Eiji, holding up the newspaper. "The Silver Pair! That's you guys, isn't it?"

"The Silver Pair?" said Choutarou, taking the newspaper and laughing slightly. "We thought it was funny too. But it's really just a coincidence. There's two of them, see? And they both wear silver."

"No way." Said Momo. "We're not going to believe that. You guys are the Silver Pair and you know it so stop pretending."

"Believe whatever you want." Said Shishido. "But we're not the Silver Pair. In fact, we were just talking about how idiotic they looked and ARE for that matter."

"Then why are you dressed like that?" Oshitari said.

"Like what?" Choutarou asked.

"You know." Said Oshitari. "The ridiculous hair. The glasses. The suits."

"Oh…well, we work over there." Shishido said, pointing at the news station. "So we wear the suits. It's the eighties, so we do our hair like this. And the glasses make us look smart."

"See, look?" said Choutarou. "There's no prescription at all."

"So you guys came to a world where there are superheroes, but you're both just innocent bystanders?" Kirihara questioned skeptically.

"I suppose." Said Choutarou. "We were kind of bummed out at first because we had the same thought you as guys. We sort of figured that if we were going to suddenly be in a new Universe, we should at least get to be the superheroes."

"But our role here is pretty important." Shishido went on. "We report on the Silver Pair. It's hard to get pictures of them, though. They don't really like getting their pictures taken, but we've had a few interviews with them, as long as we promise not to bring cameras."

"Interviews?" said Momo. "What are they like?"

"Well, they're mostly just lame." Shishido answered, putting his hands in his pockets.

Choutarou laughed and adjusted his glasses. "I don't know, Shishido!" he said. "I'm a bit of a fan, I have to admit!"

"Well, that's YOU, Choutarou." Said Shishido. "I happen to think they're lame. Pompous and overconfident. Not at all like you'd expect from a pair that isn't really all THAT special."

"To each his own, I guess." Choutarou smiled and shrugged at the others. "We agree to disagree, that's all."

"So about that mission thing." Shishido said to Inui. "When does that start? Can we do it soon? As much as Choutarou wants to get the Silver Pair's autographs, I'd rather get out of here ASAP."

Inui stared at Shishido and Choutarou and then faced everyone else.

"We need a team meeting." Said Inui. "Atobe, Oshitari and Kirihara can come if they want to, but you two stay here."

Inui grabbed his team, Atobe, Oshitari and Kirihara and pulled them aside.

"They seem pretty concerned about us finding out about their secret identities." Said Oshitari.

"Well, I don't think they're actually superheroes." Said Momo.

"Yeah!" said Taka with a nod. "I mean, they had really good excuses for everything we brought up, after all!"

"It shouldn't even matter." Said Kirihara.

"Yeah." Said Eiji. "Let's just wait for the mission, complete it and then get out of here!"

"We haven't received the mission yet." Said Inui, pointing at the blank screen. "Perhaps there is one more person. There's no telling anymore, since we know for sure that there aren't two people in each world after traveling to the Universe with only Kirihara in it."

"All right, let's just play it by ear." Said Atobe.

The seven said BREAK! and then went back over to where Shishido and Choutarou were both waiting for them to return.

"All set?" Choutarou asked.

"Yeah…we suppose…" they said AS A UNIT.

"About that mission?" Shishido led.

"We haven't received it yet." Said Inui. "But it should be coming soon, as long as we've found everyone."

"We're right here." Shishido pointed out.

"Is there anyone else in this Universe that shouldn't be here?" Taka asked. "Namely, people who are likely from our original Universe."

"Not anyone that we've seen." Choutarou said regretfully.

"Too bad." Said Eiji. "Looks like we'll have to test our luck again and find anyone else!"

"Do you want to start in the morning?" Choutarou asked. "It's getting late and you all look tired. Where are you staying?"

"Well, we don't really know." Atobe said. "We only just got here a few hours ago, and we've been looking for you two the entire time."

"They can stay with us!" said Choutarou, looking at Shishido for approval. "Can't they, Shishido? Wouldn't that be the nice thing to do?"

"I guess…" said Shishido as he glared at them.

"You guys live together?" Oshitari said, not looking surprised at all.

"Well, not originally." Choutarou said. "I actually live practically across town but Shishido lives in an apartment building closer to the news station and had an extra room so he invited me to stay with him. It's more convenient, especially since we didn't really know what was going on."

A few people were trying to stifle their laughter as Shishido clenched his fist angrily, while Choutarou just stood there looking oblivious and totally hospitable as he could.

"It's just easier that way." Shishido said, trying to keep from going on a murderous rampage.

"Oh, we never doubted you." Momo said, patting Shishido on the shoulder.

"Don't touch me." Said Shishido, slapping Momo's hand aside.

"Ootori, I don't know if there will be enough room in Shishido's apartment for all of us." Atobe said. "I suggest we split up between the two apartments."

"That makes sense!" said Choutarou. "Who should go where?"

"How about…Hyoutei stays at Shishido's, while Seigaku and Rikkai Dai stay at Choutarou's apartment?" Atobe suggested.

"Hey, no way!" said Momo. "You guys can have Kirihara!"

"Your team isn't the majority anymore." Said Atobe. "We have just as many team members on Hyoutei as on Seigaku now."

"Well, WE don't want Kirihara." Said Momo.

"Why doesn't anybody want me?" Kirihara said, looking sad.

"It's nothing against you, Kirihara, but it's just another person to take up space." Eiji explained. "Cause it's four and four, and then there's you. And you're on Rikkai Dai."

"I know." Said Kirihara.

"So yeah, you guys can have him." Said Momo to Atobe.

"No thank you." Said Atobe.

"I don't mind!" said Choutarou, but Atobe elbowed him in the stomach.

"Technically, both apartments belong to Hyoutei anyway." Atobe pointed out. "So, if we so desired, we could kick the five of you out and just do two and two."

"Why am I being punished?" whined Kirihara.

"Well then we just won't include you when we get the mission, and we'll just leave without you!" Momo stuck his tongue out at Atobe.

"Ha." Said Atobe. "You need Ootori and Shishido in order to complete the mission so you don't have a choice."

"It's all right, Momo." Said Taka, putting his hand on Momo's shoulder. "We'll take Kirihara. It's not that big of a deal!"

"Fine…" said Momo with a frown.

"Aw man…" said Kirihara, looking SO sad.


	19. Powers

Channel 19- Powers

"So what have you two been doing this entire time?" Atobe questioned as he sat at the kitchen table and Choutarou poured everyone a cup of tea.

"Well, at first we were pretty confused as you would understand." Shishido said. "I bet you guys went through the same thing."

"Eh." They both shrugged it off.

"We sort of just settled into the new lives set up by our alternate universe selves and hoped for the best." Choutarou shrugged as he put the tea kettle down and sat down in the empty seat at the table.

"That was after we got a call from our angry boss demanding to know why we missed work for three days." Shishido added.

"How was YOUR Universe?" Choutarou asked, folding his hands pleasantly.

"Well…" Oshitari began, looking at Atobe.

"We killed some people." Said Atobe.

"Oh really?" said Shishido.

"How?" Choutarou asked, taking a sip of tea.

"Shooting, breaking the neck, you know." Oshitari answered. "They were fugitives so it's not like it really matters."

"I feel like killing should be a last resort." Choutarou said. "I mean, even if they are bad, they should be given the benefit of the doubt and at least put in jail."

"Choutarou." Shishido said sternly.

"Oh right." Choutarou looked down. "I have no strong opinion one way or the other."

"I see." Atobe raised his eyebrow.

"So…" Shishido twiddled his thumbs.

"Look, we KNOW you guys are the Silver Pair." Said Oshitari.

"Of course we are!" said Shishido as he stood up. "In tennis! But that's all!"

"We've all seen the old superhero movies." Oshitari said. "We're not IDIOTS."

"And how dare you think we are." Atobe crossed his arms.

"We never said that!" Choutarou said.

"Don't lie to us!" said Atobe.

"It's hopeless." Said Oshitari with a sigh as he lit a cigarette and held it.

"Please don't smoke in here." Choutarou requested.

"I'm not going to smoke." Said Oshitari.

"Well then why did you light a cigarette?" Shishido asked.

"Because." Oshitari answered.

"I DEMAND that you two come forth and reveal your identities to me even though it is painfully obvious that you are the Silver Pair, as in the superhero duo that is clad in silver." Commanded Atobe.

He opened up a magazine article.

"Well, well!" said Atobe. "Here is an article written by Ootori Choutarou, in which he is interviewing Silver Boy. Ootori asks, _What is the biggest problem plaguing Metrothum at this present time?_ Silver Boy replies, _All the lame bad guys who think they're less lame than we are_."

Shishido and Choutarou only stared at Atobe with big fake smiles plastered on their faces.

"And, later on in the article, Shishido Ryou interviews Silver Man." Oshitari said, taking the magazine from Atobe. "And he asks, _What do you attribute your success in battle to?_ And Silver Man answers, _Teamwork and friendship and working together and we never give up."_

Oshitari closed the magazine and put it on the table.

"I only have one question." Atobe said.

"What is it?" said Shishido.

"Why are YOU Silver _Boy _and he's Silver _Man_?" Atobe asked.

Shishido and Choutarou looked at each other and then back at Atobe and Oshitari.

They gave heavy sighs.

Shishido pointed at Choutarou. "Because he's taller." He answered, looking disappointed with himself.

"We tried trading because I thought it made sense because Shishido was older so he should be MAN and I could be BOY, but I didn't fit into his costume…" Choutarou explained hastily.

"Well, I'm glad we had that talk." Said Oshitari.

"Was it really that obvious?" Shishido said.

"Yes." Said Atobe. "I'm surprised everyone in the entire world doesn't already know."

"You guys have to keep it a secret, please!" Choutarou pleaded.

"Why?" said Oshitari.

"Because!" said Shishido. "If our enemies ever found out that we're actually the Silver Pair then none of our loved ones would be safe!"

"Loved ones?" Atobe said. "You two have loved ones in this Universe?"

"Well…now you guys are here so I guess you're in danger if anyone found out who we were." Choutarou said.

"In that case, we'll keep it a secret." Atobe said. "Do you plan on telling the other five?"

"No!" said Shishido. "Don't tell anyone!"

"All right, all right…" said Atobe.

Everyone simultaneously took a sip of their tea.

"So…what kinds of powers do you guys have?" Oshitari asked.

Choutarou and Shishido both spit out their tea in Oshitari and Atobe's general direction, but using their mad Detective DODGING SKILLZ, they avoided being soaked.

"POWERS?" they said, sounding absolutely shocked.

"Yes…" Oshitari said slowly. "You're superheroes, you have powers. Don't you?"

"Choutarou, I want to speak to you for a moment." Shishido said, grabbing Choutarou's arm and dragging him to the other side of the room.

The two had an intense and heated exchange with loud whispers and argumentation, and then, almost as abruptly as they had departed, the two of them smiled and returned to the table.

"Why don't you tell us about the Old West?" said Choutarou. "I'm DYING to hear about that!"

Atobe and Oshitari only looked at each other with big black and white question marks above their heads.

Meanwhile, the Seigaku and Kirihara group had just managed to locate Choutarou's apartment, which was totally immaculately cleaned and kept up.

"Well, let's take a look around here." Said Momo, rubbing his hands together diabolically.

"What for?" Taka asked.

"We can find something incriminating about Ootori!" said Momo. "And then we can make fun of him about it!"

Inui walked right up to Momo and slapped him across the face. "That's a stupid idea." He said straight up. "This is Ootori we're talking about. The day you find something incriminating about him is the day someone beats Tezuka at tennis."

Momo rubbed his cheek and looked depressed. "Well, I guess that's pretty unlikely…" he concluded.

"I call the bed!" Kirihara called from the bedroom.

"Don't even think about it!" Eiji yelled after him as he sprinted in that direction as well. Everyone else followed and proceeded to have an intense five-way battle royal that involved guns and swords and anything else that could be found around the apartment because, of course, their battle stretched beyond the bedroom.

When they were done, everyone was out of breath and in the middle of the kitchen. They happened to notice that everything around them was totally destroyed and not a single thing was left unbroken. The five of them were quite wounded.

"Well…" Momo breathed. "That didn't go so well."

"I don't know if that was our…BEST idea…" Kirihara agreed.

"I feel bad for ruining Ootori's apartment." Taka admitted.

The five of them wept because they did feel bad, especially after Choutarou had been so willing and friendly about letting them use his apartment for shelter from the cold cruel world.

But when they got over it, they realized that they had accidentally destroyed the bed AND the couch and any other thing that one could potentially sleep upon and still be mildly comfortable.

"What do we do now?" said Kirihara. "I was looking forward to actually sleeping in a bed after sleeping in the middle of a desert for over a week."

"Stop complaining." Said Eiji.

Inui was about to put his two cents in, when suddenly there was a faint beeping noise that interrupted him.

They all stared at him and, sure enough, it was coming from his pocket. You know which pocket.

They ALL knew which pocket.

Inui pulled the remote control out and looked at the screen where the words were still forming.

"What's it say?" Momo asked as he crawled over.

"Save the world." Inui read.

"Save the world?" the other four repeated.

"Yes." Said Inui. "I find it so annoying that every time I read the mission, everyone always repeats me in the form of a question as a response. Can't you at least form an idea of how we're going to go about saving the world?"

"How about we stop global warming?" Taka suggested, looking excited.

"No way!" said Eiji. "I think we should tell everyone in the world to stop littering!"

"Or feed a third world country!" said Kirihara.

"Or we could tell everyone on one side of the world to jump all at the same time so we could knock the world off its axis and send the globe hurtling into the sun!" Momo said as if that would be a good idea.

Inui stared at the four of them. Then he pointed at Taka, Eiji and Kirihara. "You're on the right track, but try to think along the lines of something that would be more possible." He said.

"What about my idea?" said Momo.

"Your idea was retarded." Inui said.

"It really was." Kirihara said, putting his hand tenderly on Momo's shoulder in a comforting sort of way.

"It was better than your dumb idea!" said Momo.

"My idea rocked." Said Kirihara.

"How are we supposed to save the world?" Eiji said, throwing his arms up into the air.

"Maybe it has something to do with the Silver Pair." Taka suggested.

"You mean Shishido and Ootori or those superheroes that are in this alternate universe?" Momo asked.

"Obviously they're the same people." Inui said. "But whether they are or not, I think that's our best bet."

"What's our best bet?" Kirihara said, looking confused.

"We have to get in touch with the Silver Pair and help them save the world." Inui spelled it out, speaking very slowly and very clearly to make sure everyone could understand what he was saying.

"They're superheroes." Eiji said. "Why would they need our help?"

"I don't know." Said Inui. "But it's the only thing we've got right now."

"How do we get in touch with the Silver Pair?" Taka wondered.

"Well, I would imagine that we would have to be in some sort of peril…" Momo said. "I've got it! We can stage something so the Silver Pair comes out to rescue us and then we tell them that we made the danger up and then we can get them to let us help them save the world!"

Inui only stared at Momo.

"OR," Inui began. "We could talk to Shishido and Ootori. If they truly are not the Silver Pair, they seem to have some sort of connection with them anyway since they get interviews on a somewhat regular basis. And, if they ARE the Silver Pair, then we can just speak directly to them that way."

"Always shooting down my ideas…" Momo looked super depressed.

"Well, think up some better ideas and I'll stop shooting them down." Inui advised.

"So uh…should we head over to Shishido's apartment and arrange all that business?" Kirihara said, looking over at the clock which was, thankfully, left unbroken.

"No." said Inui, standing up and brushing himself off. "It is late and we should rest. Not to mention the fact that we don't know where his apartment is. All we know is that it is close to the news station, so we will search for them tomorrow if they do not come to get us."

"But I want to leave here as soon as possible." Kirihara complained, but Inui ignored him, and Inui certainly appears to be the boss of this whole escapade.


	20. Dr Brain

Channel 20- Dr. Brain

"All right, we're back here at the phone booth that we first saw them at…" Eiji concluded as they stood outside said phone booth as well as the large news station building. "From here, Ootori said that Shishido's apartment is close by."

"We should split up." Inui said immediately.

"Do we have to split up?" Kirihara whined. "I just know I'll be left out."

"No you won't." Inui assured him.

"Fine then." Said Kirihara. "What are the groups?"

"Well, it only makes sense to put Eiji and Taka together since they're both knights, and then to put Momo and me together since we're both pirates." Said Inui. "So you can either be in your own group or be the oddball out in one of the groups, considering you're a cowboy type person."

"I REFUSE!" said Kirihara. "I will not go in a group of ALL pirates or ALL knights because it's bad enough that I'm the only one here from Rikkai Dai."

"You really just don't fit in, do you?" said Eiji.

"Let's just try to be fair." Said Taka, wanting to be helpful.

"Yeah, it's not like it actually matters if we split up the pirates and knights." Momo added.

"Fine." Said Inui. "Whatever. Since when we were in Detective Universe, I went with Eiji, I'll go with Taka this time."

"Why do you factor random things like that into the distribution of our groups?" said Eiji.

"Leave me alone." Said Inui.

"So I'll go with this group that has Taka in it so we can both have horses." Said Kirihara. "That way, I definitely won't be left out again."

"I have no objections." Said Taka.

"I am not partial to the Momo and Eiji grouping." Inui said truthfully.

"Hey!" said Momo. "Back off! We'll be fine!"

"They'll be FINE." Said Kirihara.

"All right." Said Inui. "But if anything happens then it's not my fault."

"Why would it be your fault?" said Eiji.

"Because I was stupid enough to let the two of you be a group." Inui replied.

"Just blame Kirihara because he was the one whining so much." Momo advised.

"Don't blame me!" whined Kirihara.

But they parted ways at that point to start their search.

Meanwhile, at Shishido's apartment, everyone was sleeping. Choutarou had offered the two beds to Oshitari and Atobe before even confirming this with Shishido, and once it got to that point, it's not like Shishido could have done anything about it. So Shishido slept on the couch and Choutarou on the floor since he felt bad about not asking Shishido's permission to give up his bed.

Atobe and Oshitari were sleeping quite peacefully in the bedroom that had two twin beds when, suddenly, the room started flashing lights and sirens went off.

The two of them raised their heads from the pillow and looked around. It wasn't too hard to find the source of the noise, which was a giant red telephone sitting in the corner of the room.

They waited for Shishido or Choutarou to come in and do something about the annoying phone, but neither of them did so Oshitari sat up, put on his glasses and then picked up the phone.

"Hello?" he said.

"DEAR GOD!" screamed the voice on the other line. "DR. BRAIN IS TERRORIZING METROTHUM AGAIN! SAVE US! YOU'RE OUR ONLY—" But then the line went dead.

Oshitari looked at the phone.

"Okay…" he said, slowly hanging it up.

"Who was it?" Atobe asked.

"How should I know?" said Oshitari, taking his glasses off and lying down.

Just when they were about to go back to sleep, the door suddenly flung open and Shishido and Choutarou were both standing there.

"DID OUR BIG RED PHONE RING?" they both yelled together.

"Way to take forever to come in." said Atobe.

Choutarou sprinted over to the phone and picked it up. "Hello, Mayor?" he said frantically. "MAYOR?"

Shishido ran over as well and looked dramatic as Choutarou's face fell, hanging up the phone.

"What is it?" Shishido said.

"It's…nothing…" Choutarou said, and he and Shishido both simultaneously clenched their fists tightly.

"Um yeah so, the guy on the phone said that Dr. Brain was terrorizing the city or something?" Oshitari said.

"WHAT?" they both yelled. "DR. BRAIN? NO!"

"You ready, Choutarou?" said Shishido.

"I am, Shishido!" said Choutarou. "Silver Pair spring into action!"

"Let's go!" they yelled as they ran out of the room.

Oshitari and Atobe looked at each other with raised eyebrows, and then snuggled back up under their comforters.

MEANWHILE! ZING ZANG! ACTION PACKED!

Dr. Brain was essentially a tiny little man with a white lab coat and a giant head to contain his ridiculously sized brain. He looked like one of those typical smarmy super geniuses that the heroes must always take on.

Except this time around, Dr. Brain was inside a giant mechanical spider and doing quite an effective job destroying the city.

"BWA HA HA!" laughed Dr. Brain as he pulled at some levers to make his spider move. "Stop me if you can, Silver Pair!"

"Funny you should mention that!" came a voice, even though technically no one should be able to hear him and he shouldn't be able to hear anyone else considering he's in his bullet proof dome in the very heart of his evil mechanical spider.

"Silver Pair!" Dr. Brain yelled as he shook his fist in the general direction in which he ASSUMED the Silver Pair was coming. "I have loathed you ever since that day…"

Let's take a moment to tell you that Dr. Brain wasn't ALWAYS like this…

"_Honey, I'm home!" said Dr. Brain as he walked into his house. He was dressed normally and looked totally normal as well, meaning that his head was the size of most people's heads. He was also a normal height._

"_Darling!" said Dr. Brain's wife as she came over to hug him._

"_I can't wait to eat your pot roast!" said Dr. Brain as he opened the closet to put away his hat and coat._

_And then, out of nowhere, a vat of toxic waste fell right out of his closet and splashed all over his head and his wife. For some reason, his wife died right away, but Dr. Brain's head started growing to immense sizes and he shrank to midget size and then he became a super evil genius._

_And then he decided that it was the Silver Pair's fault for his deformities and the death of his wife._

Of course, that's not the WHOLE story. But some parts must be left ambiguous and vague so that there's an opportunity to fill them in later in case it would make an interesting subplot.

As for the Silver Pair, they were, as you might have guessed, dressed in silver. Of course, they're super heroes so they had capes too. And were… er… FORM FITTING.

"Leave the people of Metrothum alone!" said Shishido, who had a big 'SB' on the front of his costume. (ISN'T THAT HILARIOUS?)

"Apparently, the beating we gave you last time wasn't enough!" added Choutarou, clad in HIS costume that had a big 'SM' on the front. (ISN'T THAT EVEN MORE HILARIOUS?)

"You won't stop me THIS time, Silver Pair!" said Dr. Brain as he vigorously started pulling levers and pressing buttons, which made the mechanical spider's legs do crazy things.

Choutarou jumped into the air and remained suspended there as Shishido whipped out a piece of his utility belt, which happened to be an extremely long cord that was as light as a feather but as strong as diamonds. Shishido threw the end to Choutarou who flew towards the giant mechanical spider, and circled around the legs many times.

"Pull it tight!" Shishido called.

"Got it!" said Choutarou as he gave the cord a good tug, tangling all the legs up and causing the spider to fall to the ground.

This action in itself caused much destruction in the city, but surely it was NOTHING compared to the damage Dr. Brain would have caused if he had been unopposed!

Dr. Brain's bulletproof dome wasn't exactly fall over proof so it smashed open. Dr. Brain tumbled out and landed in the middle of the street among the debris of his giant spider, which was just totally trashed after something as minor as falling over.

"Damn you Silver Pair!" yelled Dr. Brain to the sky. "DAMN YOU!"

"Let's clean up!" Shishido called to Choutarou.

"Gladly!" said Choutarou as he swooped in for the final attack.

Dr. Brain whipped out a small devise and laughed diabolically. "Not so fast!" he said. "You'll have to defeat my LEGION OF TERROR!"

When he pressed the button, compartments all around the mechanical spider opened up and mutants of all shapes and sizes poured out, lumbering around looking ugly and making a mess. Dr. Brain cackled evilly and then jumped into an unmanly little hover craft and flew off into the sky.

Random bystanders screamed and continued to run around in a state of utter chaos.

"What are we going to do?" Choutarou flew over to Shishido and hovered just slightly off the ground. "We can't protect all of the citizens AND go after Dr. Brain at the same time!"

"We'll just have to try!" said Shishido, looking determined. "Behind you!"

Choutarou spun around just as a giant club held by a hideous mutant came in his direction. But before he even needed to react, he heard a loud gunshot and the mutant crumpled to the ground.

"Inui!" said Choutarou as he looked over to see Inui standing there with his gun smoking. Shishido smacked Choutarou on the shoulder. "I mean… strange random guy that I don't really know!"

"I haven't got any more shots so keep on the lookout." Said Inui, pocketing the gun and pulling out his sword. "You guys go after the misshapen man with the large head."

The Silver Pair looked around to see that Kirihara and Taka were both riding around doing some damage to the mutants as well.

"You have to go after Dr. Brain." Shishido said to Choutarou.

"Right!" said Choutarou, reaching out his hand for Shishido to grab onto so they could both fly after Dr. Brain.

"No!" said Shishido as if it was the most dramatic thing IN THE WORLD. "You go! I'll stay here and fight with the others!"

"Are you sure?" said Choutarou, ALSO looking as though it was the most dramatic thing IN THE WORLD.

"Go!" said Shishido. "Dr. Brain is getting away!"

"…All right!" said Choutarou as he flew after Dr. Brain.

Shishido turned around and pulled some projectiles in the shape of an S out of his utility belt and started hurling them at the mutants.

Somehow, the mutants managed to knock both Taka and Kirihara off their horses. The horses were probably murdered on the spot, but Taka and Kirihara weren't all that torn up about it because they knew the horses would be resurrected the next time they went into the next Universe, so they just continued fighting. After a little while of fighting the mutants, the quartet started to get overwhelmed and were backed into a corner with all the mutants slowly approaching them.

"Why are you helping?" Shishido demanded of the other three.

"It's too difficult to explain right now if you're NOT Shishido." Said Kirihara.

Shishido frowned. "Fine." He said. "I am. Why are you helping?"

"Because it's our mission in order to leave this Universe and we want to make sure it's done right." Inui answered.

"Choutarou and I can handle it!" said Shishido.

"It couldn't hurt to help!" said Taka.

But they were unable to have anymore small talk because the mutants had gotten close enough to attack them and it was quite necessary to defend. Because they're mutants. And mutants mean business.

They weren't fighting for too long, however, because Dr. Brain suddenly returned in his unmanly hovercraft and called off his LEGION OF TERROR!

"ATTENTION ALL OF YOU!" Dr. Brain screamed.

They all looked up at him and tried not to laugh in his face and, instead, look slightly intimidated but still confident.

"Do you think that if Oshitari or Atobe shot at this guy then it would hit him instead of me?" Kirihara asked.

"Probably." Said Inui. "Where are they anyway?"

"They're still sleeping back at the apartment." Shishido answered.

"AHEM!" said Dr. Brain angrily.

"Okay…what is it?" said Shishido.

"I'll have you know that I have defeated Silver Man!" Dr. Brain announced.

"No!" said Shishido. "I don't believe you!"

"I have finally discovered his weakness and I have exploited it!" Dr. Brain went on.

"What's his weakness?" Taka whispered to Shishido.

"SH!" said Shishido, looking totally captivated with whatever Dr. Brain was going to say.

"Yes," said Dr. Brain. "I have captured civilians and am holding them hostage!"

Shishido looked relieved. "Well, at least he hasn't figured out his REAL weakness." He said.

"What is the real weakness?" Taka asked again.

"I'm not telling!" Shishido said angrily.

"AND," said Dr. Brain. "These hostages of mine… they are all YOUR SIDEKICKS!"

"Our…?" Kirihara repeated. "We have sidekicks?"

"Yes." Said Dr. Brain. "A Superhero cannot exist without his sidekick."

"We're not superheroes." Said Inui.

"Yes you are!" Dr. Brain decided. "You are Pirate Man, you are Knight Man and you are Cowboy Man."

"We sound like members of the YMCA…" Kirihara frowned.

"So I found Squire Boy and Pirate Boy and I have taken them to my lair!" laughed Dr. Brain.

"YOU FIEND!" said Shishido.

"Is that Eiji and Momo?" Taka asked Inui.

"I believe so." Said Inui with a sigh. "I knew something like this would happen. Well, not something quite like this. Not even I could predict something like this. But I knew those two would somehow get in trouble."

Just then, Choutarou came flying back over. "Dr. Brain, I heard everything!" said Choutarou even though he was far away so technically it's not physically possible for him to have heard everything. "I won't let you get away with this!"

"Oh but I already have!" said Dr. Brain, pointing over at the group that was still on the ground to reveal that the mutants had somehow all jumped Shishido at the same time and were restraining him, even though that doesn't really make sense because no one gave them the order AND they weren't even near him about five seconds ago.

"NO!" said Choutarou.

"Catch me if you can, Silver Man!" said Dr. Brain as he pulled out his little devise again and pressed the button. Choutarou lunged for Dr. Brain but he suddenly disappeared, along with his entire LEGION OF TERROR! And Shishido.

Choutarou looked so sad. He sank back down to the ground and sat there in a heap with his head in his hands.

"Say something." Inui urged Taka.

"Oh…kay…" Taka slowly took a few steps forward and put a hand on Choutarou's shoulder. "Flying. Hey, so that's pretty cool."

"We have to get them back…" Choutarou looked up and pointed at the sky. "We have to get them back!"

Inui, Taka and Kirihara all looked at each other, and awkwardly agreed with his theatrical declaration.


	21. Hideout

Channel 21- Hideout

Momo and Eiji were chillin' like foolz with nothing to do except talk amongst themselves.

Just then, the door to their prison opened up, and a few mutants were there with Shishido. They tossed Shishido in and then slammed the door shut. Shishido ran up to the door and pounded on it for a few seconds before he came to the horrible realization that it was locked.

Then he turned around and discovered he had company.

"Hi." Said Momo and Eiji, waving.

"Um…hi…" Shishido said, waving back.

"S-B?" Momo read, pointing to the symbol on Shishido's costume.

"Silver Boy." Shishido clarified.

"Oh!" gasped Eiji as he jumped to his feet. "We were actually just looking for you and Silver Man! Inui's gonna feel stupid that he had a bad feeling about putting the two of us together!"

"All right!" said Momo as the two of them put their hands out and jumped up into the air like a couple of Power Rangers.

"You idiots!" said Shishido as he walked over to them and pushed them apart. "You're in Dr. Brain's lair and all you can do is stand around and cheer and think about frivolous things?"

"What are we SUPPOSED to do?" Momo said.

"We have to think of a way to escape!" said Shishido.

"How?" Eiji asked.

"Well…they took away my utility belt…" Shishido said, frowning and pacing.

"And they took away my sword too." Momo added, then he looked even SADDER. "And my telescope. They didn't HAVE to take away my telescope."

"I don't think they noticed this on my person." Eiji said as he pulled out his butter knife. "But I don't think it'll be very useful."

"Are you kidding?" Shishido said as he swiped the knife away from Eiji and marveled at it. "It's perfect!"

"For what?" Momo and Eiji asked together.

Shishido glared at them, and then tucked the knife in his boot.

"Hey wait!" said Eiji. "That's MY knife!"

"I know." Said Shishido. "I'm borrowing it."

"For what?" Momo said.

"For when they tie us up." Shishido replied.

"Tie us up?" complained Momo and Eiji.

"Will you two just STOP?" said Shishido, getting frustrated so fast. "I know what I'm doing! I go through this almost every day!"

"Go through what?" Eiji asked.

"You know." Said Shishido. "Getting kidnapped by the bad guy and used as leverage when the hero gets here. All sidekicks go through it."

"We're not sidekicks." Said Eiji.

"Well, actually Eiji, you sort of are." Said Momo. "Considering your only purpose is to aid Taka and do things that he tells you to do."

"Oh yeah?" said Eiji, putting his hands on his hips. "Well YOU'RE a sidekick too because Inui is the captain of the pirate ship and you're one of his crewmates!"

"Oh YEAH?" said Momo.

"YEAH!" said Eiji.

They got all in each other's faces as Shishido crossed his arms and cleared his throat.

"WHAT?" they both demanded.

"Nothing." Said Shishido. "You're just being lame and I wanted to make sure you were both completely aware of it, that's all."

MEANSMASHBAMBOOMPOWWHILE!

"So…" Atobe said slowly as he and the rest of their noncaptured comrades strolled down the busy streets of Metrothum. Choutarou had decided to put his suit and tie and glasses and slicked back hair on instead of walking around in his superhero costume just so they'd draw less attention, but the others sort of stuck out anyway. "Shishido and two of your teammates have been kidnapped by this Dr. Brain fellow?"

"That's what we JUST said." Said Inui.

"I was just making sure." Said Atobe.

"It's all my fault." Choutarou said. "Shishido getting kidnapped like this reminds me of… yesterday! And the day before! And twice the day before that! Did you know that one time we were actually on our way from saving Shishido from being kidnapped when he got kidnapped again?"

"No, but we know that now." Oshitari said.

"Why does Shishido get kidnapped so much?" said Kirihara.

"That's all my fault too." Choutarou said. "It's always…would you rather save your sidekick or save this bus of orphans! Or…save your sidekick or save this pregnant woman! It never ends."

The others looked at each other.

"Um…" Atobe began. "What ever happened to that bus of orphans or that pregnant woman?"

"What?" said Choutarou, looking confused.

"Well, you brought up a bus of orphans and a pregnant woman." Atobe said. "And you implied that there was always a choice between one of those or Shishido. And I think I speak for all of us when I say that I noticed that Shishido is still alive and with us today."

Choutarou gasped. "You think I DIDN'T save the orphans?"

"Well…" everyone shrugged at each other.

"Oh no." Choutarou said. "Somehow, I always manage to save them both… but every time I'm afraid that I won't be able to! And that's the day that frightens me the most!"

"All right…so the orphans and the pregnant woman…they're all right?" Taka clarified.

"Of course!" said Choutarou.

"Just making sure." Taka said.

"Do you have to wear those glasses?" said Oshitari.

"Huh?" said Choutarou.

"I don't know." Said Oshitari. "I'm just asking."

"Guys!" said Choutarou. "We have to save Shishido and the others! We can't be talking about random things! There's no telling what Dr. Brain has planned and what he's going to do to them!"

"He's right." Said Taka. "What should we do?"

"Well, a little while ago, Shishido and I discovered that our secret hideout was right underneath the apartment building that I stay at!" said Choutarou. "So we're just heading there so we can get our Silver Mobile and stock up on some more weapons!"

Inui reached out and grabbed Choutarou's shoulder just as he realized they were standing right in front of the apartment building.

"You don't have to go inside your actual apartment, do you?" Inui said.

"Obviously of course I do!" said Choutarou. "We have to go through my apartment to get to the secret hideout. I don't know how it works, it just does."

Taka, Kirihara and Inui all looked at each other uneasily, but they didn't have any other choice at this point.

"The thing is, Ootori…" Kirihara was trying to explain as they rode the elevator upwards.

"What?" Choutarou said.

"Er…"

They moved down the hallway and Choutarou opened up the door only to be faced with a horrible mess. Everything was broken and destroyed and in disarray, and Choutarou only stood there with his mouth hanging open.

"What happened here…?" Atobe said, looking just as shocked.

"Looks like a massive fight took place." Oshitari observed.

"Oh no!" Choutarou exclaimed, slapping his cheeks. "This is impossible!"

"We WANTED to tell you…" Taka began, looking ultimately apologetic as he reached out to comfort Choutarou.

"I can't believe Dr. Brain would sink this low!" Choutarou said, clenching his fist. "This means that he must know my secret identity and he was probably looking for the location of our hideout!"

He looked over at Inui, Taka and Kirihara.

"I'm sorry I put all of you in danger." He said. "I never should have let you stay here! I'm just thankful that you weren't here when Dr. Brain was or else you might not have made it out alive!"

"Hang on—" Taka started but Kirihara elbowed him in the stomach.

"We're glad too!" said Kirihara.

"We don't blame you." Inui added.

"Thank you." Said Choutarou. And he wasn't just saying that. He really WAS thankful.

"So what now?" Atobe asked.

"Well, we have to get to the hideout and hope that Dr. Brain didn't find it!" Choutarou answered as he rushed to the giant grandfather clock that was in shambles. "Hopefully it will still work."

He opened up what was left of the broken swinging glass door and then pulled the pendulum down. The pendulum then tucked back up inside the clock and Choutarou urged everyone else to step inside the clock where the pendulum had once been.

"So…is it an elevator or something?" Inui tried.

"No, it's a slide." Choutarou said, pointing downwards to reveal that there was no place to stand.

"And when did you plan on telling us that there was going to be a sudden drop after we stepped inside?" Atobe questioned.

"Oh." Choutarou lowered his head. "I never really thought about it. I thought it was obvious that it was going to be a slide."

They told him that it would NOT have been obvious. One by one, they all stepped in and braced themselves for a long ride, which was quite intense and fast and downwardly sloped. None of them were about to admit that they actually had fun and wouldn't mind having another go at it.

"Elevators are the way to go, just for future reference." Oshitari said. "It's more comfortable for guests."

"I have to admit, we never planned on having guests in our secret hideout." Choutarou said. "I hope Shishido doesn't get angry at me for revealing it to you guys!"

He turned on some lights to reveal that they were in a very silver-tastic secret hideout that was all high-tech and specialrific.

"I wonder if any of these gadgets would transport us back to our correct Universe." Inui said as he immediately went over to the most high tech looking table of them all and picked up the shiniest and most high tech looking device OF THEM ALL.

"Um…that's Shishido's…" Choutarou said, gently taking the device away from Inui and setting it down. "He doesn't like it when other people touch his things."

"I'll respect his wishes." Said Inui. "Which device here does NOT belong to Shishido, then?"

"Er…well, actually…" Choutarou said nervously. "They're ALL his…"

"None of this is yours?" Taka asked as he stopped touching things as well.

"To be honest, I don't even know how to turn on our super computer." Choutarou said embarrassedly as he pointed at the massive super computer that was taking up at least half of the hideout.

"I could try it." Said Inui as he started walking towards it, but then stopped and looked at Choutarou. "If it's all right with Shishido."

"I'm sure it would be all right with Shishido if it was part of an effort to save him!" Choutarou said. "All you have to do is find the location of Dr. Brain's lair and we'll be on our way!"

Inui sat down in the super computer chair and immediately started typing as if the super computer was one of his inventions and he knew all the ins and outs.

"So…" Kirihara crossed his arms. "Shishido is your sidekick with tons of gadgets and a utility belt."

"He doesn't have any powers, does he?" Oshitari said finally.

Choutarou looked down. "No…he doesn't…" he said. "But don't tell him I told you! I'm sure he'd be REALLY upset if you all knew!"

"You know, not everyone has feelings as fragile as yours." Said Atobe BUT NOT REALLY. Because he knew it would hurt Choutarou's feelings. He ACTUALLY said this: "Well, we know that you can fly. Can you do anything else?"

"Fly…" Choutarou said with a sigh. "Nope! Haha, no, that's it."

"I'm willing to bet you have super strength as well." Kirihara concluded. "I mean, you were able to pull all the legs of the giant mechanical spider together with seemingly no trouble."

"All right, fine." Choutarou said. "I have super strength too."

"Anything else?" Taka asked.

"No, that's it." Choutarou said. "Really!"

"Why are you hiding your powers from us?" Atobe demanded. "We KNOW you have more powers than that."

"How did you know I was hiding my powers from you?" Choutarou gasped.

"Because you just said you were." Atobe said, looking SO SMUG.

Oshitari slapped him five as Choutarou pouted some more.

"Hey, everyone." Inui called from the super computer, and everyone sprinted over to see.

"Did you find the location of Dr. Brain's lair?" Choutarou asked eagerly.

Inui looked at Choutarou with that face that was like, "I'm Inui. DUH."

"Yes, I did." Inui said. "It's on the island just west of Metrothum."

"Of course!" Choutarou said. "Why didn't I see that before?"

"All right, so let's head over there." Said Taka, going towards where the slide was. "How do we get out?"

"This way!" said Choutarou. "We'll take the Silver Sniper!"

"What's that?" asked Kirihara.

"A jet." Choutarou replied. "Do any of you know how to fly a jet?"

"Don't tell me you can't do that either." Atobe said.

"Shishido usually flies it!" Choutarou said.

"Do you have anything else that's not as complicated?" asked Taka.

"We have the Silver Mobile." Choutarou said. "It's pretty much just a really supped up car."

"None of us can drive." Oshitari reminded him.

"Shishido can." Choutarou said, crossing his arms and frowning childishly.

"Public transportation it is." Inui declared. "To the bus."

"TO THE BUS!" cheered everyone as they punched the air.


	22. Sidekicks

Channel 22- Sidekicks

"AND SO," Dr. Brain continued explaining his evil plot to Eiji, Momo and Shishido who were all tied up back to back on a platform. "I plan to send out an urgent message to everyone on one side of the world telling them that they all must jump at the same time in order to stop someone evil from destroying the world!"

"What will that prove?" demanded Shishido angrily as he struggled fruitlessly at his bindings.

"It will tilt the world off its axis and send the globe hurtling into the sun!" Dr. Brain laughed. "BWA HA HA HA!"

"YOU FIEND!" Shishido said passionately. "What will you gain from that?"

"Sick diabolical pleasure!" said Dr. Brain.

But Eiji and Momo were only looking at each other, trying to keep themselves from chuckling warmly.

"How ironic!" Momo laughed.

"Yeah!" said Eiji. "And you thought that would SAVE the world!"

"Stop laughing!" commanded Dr. Brain. "No having fun! No enjoying yourselves while being my prisoners!"

"Why did you capture us anyway?" Momo asked. "All that's going to do is cause the others to come to our rescue. If you had just sent out the message without kidnapping us or telling anyone then you would have easily gotten away with it."

"In retrospect, I realize that it wasn't such a good idea." Said Dr. Brain. "But I was in the moment and was angry at Silver Man for thwarting my plans to destroy the city with my giant mechanical spider!"

"So you take it out on the world?" demanded Shishido.

"Yes!" said Dr. Brain. "HA HA HA!"

Dr. Brain then marched out of the room, leaving his mutants to stand guard.

"And I thought the people in the OTHER Universes were weird." Eiji said. "But this guy takes the cake."

While Momo and Eiji continued to sit there and badmouth Dr. Brain for no good reason, (other than he has them captured and tied up and is about to destroy the world) Shishido was working on getting at least one hand free so he could reach the butter knife in his boot. Though, if you think about it, theoretically if he is able to get ONE hand free, he should be able to get the other hand free since the ropes would become loose, and in turn, the others would be free as well. BUT WHO'S TECHNICAL IN THIS WORLD?

Shishido did, of course, eventually reach the knife and cut his ropes, thus freeing himself.

"YAY SILVER BOY!" cheered Momo and Eiji as he cut them free as well. "OUR HERO!"

"Don't say that again!" said Shishido as a shiver ran down his spine. "It creeps me out."

But then, we must have all forgotten that there are mutants standing guard at the door. Whence they came to the slow realization that their prisoners had somehow escaped their bindings, they sprang into action.

Luckily, for some reason unbeknownst to anyone alive, Dr. Brain had left Shishido's utility belt and Momo's sword (and telescope) on the table nearby them, so they were able to make a jump for these precious items, making it more fair in fighting the mutants.

Shishido tossed Eiji his butter knife back.

"Oh wow, thanks." Said Eiji sarcastically as he just hid behind Momo instead of doing anything proactive.

Even though Shishido had been easily overpowered by the mutants earlier, he seemed to quite suddenly gain the ability to fight them all off easily. Momo felt inspired by his piratey sword fighting music and managed to smite a few of the smaller less experienced mutants that weren't busy with Shishido.

After a little while of fighting, the mutants had all perished.

"Well, that was intense." Said Momo as he picked up a rag on the floor and wiped his sword off.

"It's not over yet." Said Shishido. "We have to regroup and stop Dr. Brain!"

They all stared at each other.

"Okay…good regrouping." Shishido concluded. "Let's go!"

"YEAH!" said Momo and Eiji.

They followed Shishido as he ran through the door. They had to fight off a few more mutants as they made their way to the very Central Heart of Dr. Brain's evil lair.

"Oh good!" Shishido said as they got inside the Central Heart and slammed the door shut. "Dr. Brain has a supercomputer too!"

"What does that mean?" said Momo quizzically just as the door to the Central Heart started pounding.

"Brace that door!" Shishido ordered as he ran over to the supercomputer and turned it on.

Momo and Eiji did as they were told because the last thing they wanted was for mutants to burst in on them and force them to fight them more. Plus, the mutants were not pleasing to the eye so if they could go longer without seeing them then they could stand to brace the door for Shishido EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T ASK NICELY.

Shishido typed on the supercomputer like a whiz kid and felt it necessary to self narrate as if Momo and Eiji weren't completely preoccupied with bracing the door from the mutants.

"I can access the supercomputer back at my hideout from here if I could just crack the codes!" Shishido said.

"Why?" Momo called.

"To see if anyone has accessed it recently!" Shishido said. "I'm the only one who knows the entrance password, and I'll know that if someone else has logged on then Dr. Brain will have found my hideout!"

"Um…HELLO?" said Eiji. "Remember? Everyone jumping at the same time? World being thrown into the sun?"

"Yeah!" agreed Momo. "I hardly think Dr. Brain accessing your computer at home is really that big of a deal in comparison, do you?"

"Good point." Shishido turned back to the computer and called up the file that was 'Operation: JUMP'. "Yes…it's all here! All the information about his evil plot is right here!"

"ARGH!" said Momo. "We already know what his plot is!"

"Just find a way to stop him!" Eiji urged.

"He plans on sending the message to everyone on one side of the globe with a letter in the mail." Shishido said. "The letter is going to say on the outside that the recipient has one a million dollars, but the inside will, in fact, just have directions to jump at a certain time!"

"Why doesn't he just use email?" Eiji frowned.

"It's 1980, Eiji." Momo pointed out.

"Why does he think this idea will work…?" Shishido frowned. "I almost feel like there's nothing to worry about."

"Yeah, I agree." Momo said. "I mean, would everyone jumping at the same time really be enough to throw the world off its axis?"

"Probably not." Shishido said.

Suddenly, the pounding on the door stopped.

"Hey!" said Eiji, stepping away. "I don't know how the two of us managed to hold off a horde of mutants just by standing in front of a door, but somehow we did it! They must have given up!"

"Everything ALWAYS works in favor of the heroes in THIS world!" Momo announced.

"Get away from the door!" Shishido ordered as he pushed them out of the way and then pressed his ear up against the door.

After a slight pause, Momo and Eiji leaned in, wanting to hear whatever he was listening to.

"RUN!" Shishido yelled suddenly as he grabbed both of them and leapt as far as he could just as the doorway exploded in a burst of fiery flames.

"Oh dear God…" Eiji cried as he covered his head.

"SO!" came the voice of Dr. Brain.

The three "sidekicks" slowly raised their heads and looked over to see that Dr. Brain was there in his little unmanly hovercraft and surrounded by his evil mutant henchmen.

He floated over to where they were. "You managed to escape!" he said. "Well it will do you no good! I have already sent out all the letters to one half of the globe! The world is as good as thrown into the sun!"

"You DO know that you'll die too, right?" said Momo, tapping Dr. Brain's hovercraft, which almost caused it to spin out of control but Dr. Brain hastily gained control and came back.

"Of course I do!" said Dr. Brain. "What good is it to live like this? No love, and to constantly be surrounded only by those who are more mutated looking than I am!"

Dr. Brain caressed his giant pulsating head and looked sad.

"Are you trying to make us feel bad for you as you're about to destroy the world?" asked Momo. "As if your freakish appearance is justification for the slaughter of the entire human race?"

"And all the animals too." Eiji added.

"BE SILENT!" yelled Dr. Brain. "For that, you three shall be the first to die!"

"You two!" said Shishido angrily. "Can't you just keep your mouths shut?"

"He's asking for it." Momo said.

"Besides, we can take him!" Eiji stood up. "After we fended off all those mutants, finishing this guy shouldn't be very hard at all!"

But pretty much AS he was saying that, a bunch of the mutants grabbed them and restrained them.

"Why didn't you guys fight back?" Eiji said, looking sad.

"I was waiting for him to do something!" Momo said, gesturing towards Shishido.

"If you're waiting for Silver Man to come, don't bother!" said Dr. Brain.

"What?" demanded Shishido. "Why? What have you done?"

"My mutants spotted Cowboy Man, Knight Man and Pirate Man trying to cross the bridge on a local bus earlier today, and then blew up the bridge!" said Dr. Brain. "We can only assume that Silver Man will have his hands full for the rest of the day saving people who fell into the water!"

"Knight Man?" said Eiji.

"Pirate Man?" Momo added.

"Cowboy Man?" they both said together as if they had planned it.

"Either that," Dr. Brain went on. "Or Silver Man was aboard that bus as well and we managed to sink him into the water!"

"Never!" said Shishido.

Dr. Brain then started laughing diabolically and eventually his mutants joined in.

"That's what YOU think, Dr. Brain!" came a voice from among the mutants.

Everyone looked frantically around and then spotted six mutants who all took off their costumes to reveal that they weren't mutants at all! They were actually… COWBOY MAN, KNIGHT MAN, PIRATE MAN, SILVER MAN and…and…

"THE BLACK AND WHITE DUO?" screamed Dr. Brain.

"Um…sure…" said Atobe and Oshitari, looking at each other with a shrug.

"I knew you'd come!" said Shishido.

"It's over now, Dr. Brain!" said Choutarou. "We've intercepted your letters that you're sending across the globe in order to send said globe into the sun! You're all washed up!"

"Oh yeah? If I'm so washed up then let's see how well you fair against my… LEGION OF TERROR!" yelled Dr. Brain as more mutants came from various other entrances and he flew out of the room laughing diabolically. Of course, his mutants that had been holding onto Momo, Eiji and Shishido ran out of the room too.

"When will he ever learn?" said Choutarou as the mutants closed in.

"Let's just plow right through them." Atobe said, pulling out his gun.

"Agreed." Oshitari said.


	23. The Big Decision

Channel 23- The Big Decision

We'll just have you know that, t'were this a comic book, you likely would have just seen the following seven panels.

First, a shot of Oshitari firing a gun at a mutant.

Second, Atobe standing over a mutant he had just shot.

Third, Taka going into Burning Mode as he plows through a crowd of mutants.

Fourth, Inui striking a cool pose that involved his sword up and around his face area as he stood before some mutants.

Fifth, Kirihara jumping up into the air and taking a shot with one of his guns, even though it's been previously established that his guns aren't meant to actually shoot people.

Sixth, Choutarou in a very dramatic punching pose.

Seventh, the entire group standing together with a light shining behind them and their shadows extending a ridiculous length as all the mutants lied around them, perished.

So that way, you can imagine what the fight was.

"Just so you guys know." Choutarou stood in front of the door that led to the room that Dr, Brain had retreated to with the rest of the group. "This is likely the part when Dr, Brain will pull that old… you know… save Shishido or save this bus load of orphans."

"Okay." Said Atobe. "Why are you telling us this?"

"So you know." Choutarou, said looking self conscious. "So it doesn't take you by surprise or anything."

"Why don't we devise a plan then?" Inui said, stopping Choutarou from flinging open the door.

"A plan…?" Choutarou looked confused.

"Yes." Said Inui. "If you know exactly what is going to happen, let's plan accordingly."

"Good idea." Taka commented.

"How?" Choutarou asked.

"When Dr. Brain tells you to choose between the two of them," Inui began. "You save the bus load of orphans and we'll save Shishido."

"But…" Choutarou looked distressed. "What if it's something BESIDES a bus load of orphans?"

"Just save whatever the option is that ISN'T Shishido." Said Kirihara.

"Why can't I save Shishido?" Choutarou said.

"Because if it IS a busload of orphans, you have super strength so you'd be able to actually save them." Inui pointed out. "Unless you have information to the contrary, it would be easier for us to just save Shishido and you to take whatever Dr. Brain dishes out."

"Oh…well…I guess…" Choutarou said.

"Is this going to work?" Oshitari sighed.

Instead of addressing Oshitari's comment, Choutarou grabbed the door and flung it open.

They were faced with the expected. Dr. Brain was still in his little hovercraft and was there all ready for them since apparently he predicted that his Legion of Terror would be all around ineffective while some mutants had a laser gun pointed at Shishido.

"So, I see you have defeated my Legion of Terror…" said Dr. Brain.

"Let him go!" said Choutarou.

"And let the rest of our friends go too!" Taka added.

"Funny you should mention them!" said Dr. Brain.

"Here it comes…" Choutarou whispered to the group.

Some mutants entered another door with Momo and Eiji both restrained.

"Hey guys!" said Eiji.

"Shut up!" ordered Dr. Brain.

"Aww…" said Eiji sadly.

"You must make a choice, Silver Man!" said Dr. Brain. "Will you save YOUR sidekick, or will you save THEIR sidekicks?"

"Is he so sure that we won't do anything?" Kirihara questioned.

"SH!" everyone ordered.

"This is…an impossible choice…" Choutarou said, clenching his fist dramatically. "What kind of person would I be to walk away with my own sidekick while the rest of you leave empty handed? But then again, what kind of person would I be to betray my own sidekick and best friend? It is impossible to value one life more than another…"

"Ootori, seriously…the plan…" Atobe reminded him.

"Don't worry about me!" said Shishido. "Save the two of them!"

"Yeah!" said Momo, looking nervously at the mutants with their laser guns.

"I can't make this kind of decision…" Choutarou went on. "I'll just have to… save them all!"

"That was not an option!" laughed Dr. Brain.

"OOTORI!" yelled everyone angrily as Choutarou charged towards the mutants holding Momo and Eiji.

The mutant holding Shishido was JUST about to fire but Shishido went all medieval on his rear end and took him out to town. In the meanwhile, Choutarou had fought off the mutants hanging onto Momo and Eiji.

Eiji scrambled for the laser gun, as did Shishido, and at the same time they both stood up straight with the gun pointed at Dr. Brain. Choutarou was also ready and was up close and personal to Dr. Brain, and SO WAS MOMO with his sword and stuff.

And all the while, Inui, Taka, Kirihara, Atobe and Oshitari were just standing there like fool children.

"Er…" said Dr. Brain, tugging at his collar. "Well…they didn't go as well as I had hoped…"

"Nice job, Shishido!" said Choutarou, giving Shishido a high five.

"Thanks Choutarou." Said Shishido.

"Hey wait!" said Momo with a frown. "You guys are Ootori and Shishido? Why didn't you tell us?"

"Yeah!" said Eiji. "You guys said you weren't them! You lied to us! But especially you, Shishido! Cause we spent all day with YOU!"

"All right, you know, this isn't really the time to be talking about this." Shishido said, looking a little bummed out and then gesturing towards Dr. Brain who was just sitting there in his unmanly hovercraft.

"Don't mind me." Said Dr. Brain.

Choutarou grabbed Dr. Brain by his massive misshapen head and pulled him out of the hovercraft. He kicked the hovercraft across the room, causing it to explode when it hit the wall. He dropped Dr. Brain to the floor.

"We mind you!" said Choutarou.

"You wanted to destroy the whole world and we can't forgive you for that!" said Shishido.

"I didn't expect to be forgiven…" Dr. Brain raised an eyebrow.

"Shut up!" said Shishido and Choutarou.

Inui pulled out the remote control and looked at the screen.

"Because Dr. Brain was threatening the entire world and we successfully thwarted those plans, doesn't that mean that we completed the mission?" he asked of himself.

"I suppose that's true." Said Atobe.

"So why haven't we left yet?" Kirihara asked.

"We probably have to kill Dr. Brain." Oshitari suggested.

"It's always about killing, isn't it?" Eiji said.

"No, it's not necessary to kill him." Said Choutarou.

Dr. Brain sighed with relief.

"We'll take him to the proper authorities and give him justice." Choutarou decided.

"What?" said Atobe and Oshitari, looking partially appalled but mostly just disappointed.

"Oh bless your kind soul, Silver Man." Said Dr. Brain, bowing his head. "But I'll have you know that your kind heart… WILL BE YOUR DOWNFALL!"

With that, a wall crashed down and another giant mechanical spider came tromping through. Choutarou grabbed Momo and Eiji and pulled them out of harms way as debris came flying at them, and Shishido jumped to the side just in time. Dr. Brain crawled up into the spider and started controlling it.

"We'll defeat it just like we did the last one!" said Choutarou to Shishido as he dropped Eiji and Momo off where everyone else was still just standing idly by.

"Right!" said Shishido as he whipped out his intense rope from his utility belt.

"Should we be doing anything to help?" Taka questioned.

"Just stay back." Shishido ordered, handing Choutarou the rope that was as strong as diamonds. For some reason.

"You won't get me THIS time, Silver Man!" said Dr. Brain as he pressed some buttons on his mechanical spider. "My mechanical spider is new and IMPROVED!"

Lasers suddenly shot out of the spider's eyes and hit Choutarou in the chest, sending him flying against the wall, creating a big Choutarou-shaped indentation.

"Choutarou!" Shishido yelled.

"I'm all right!" Choutarou said, pushing himself out and shaking it off.

"So he's impervious as well…" Inui nodded as he took note of that in his head.

Dr. Brain shot more lasers at Choutarou, but he just raised a force field.

"And he has the power to make force fields." Inui continued.

In response to Dr. Brain's attacks, Choutarou fired some lasers out of his OWN eyes.

"And shoot lasers out of his eyes." Inui went on.

"How many powers does he have?" Atobe said, looking a little annoyed.

"Let's see how you fair against this!" said Dr. Brain as he pressed another button. Everyone waited for something to happen, but nothing did.

Except Choutarou suddenly fell to the floor.

"My one weakness!" he yelled, writhing in pain.

"How did you know?" demanded Shishido as he ran to Choutarou's aid.

"I am Dr. Brain!" yelled Dr. Brain. "I know everything!"

"Wait, what's the weakness?" Momo said, looking around.

"That's not important right now!" said Shishido. "We have to stop Dr. Brain!"

Shishido then opened up another section of his utility belt and proceeded to pull out a full length spear.

"Wait…how did you just pull a spear out of your utility belt?" said Inui.

"That's not important either!" Shishido glared at them. "Just know that it works and help me defeat Dr. Brain!"

"How do we defeat him?" Taka asked.

"Aim for the red light blinking right above the laser eyes!" Shishido said.

Taka looked uneasily at the spider. "Um…you sure about that?" he asked.

"Positive!" Shishido said, raising the spear.

"Hm…now would be a good time to have that one shot." Inui said, looking at his empty gun.

"Shishido, don't go charging at that spider with a spear." Said Atobe, pulling Shishido back. "As your captain, I must disapprove of this course of action and say that I will handle it."

Before Shishido could even argue, Atobe whipped out his gun and was about to take a shot when Kirihara grabbed his arm.

" EXCUSE ME." He said.

"Do you really think that right now you are more likely to be shot than that?" Atobe said, reminding Kirihara that Dr. Brain was there in his giant mechanical spider shooting lasers at them.

"All right…point taken." Kirihara backed off.

Atobe then took a shot and of course it hit directly in the middle of the blinking red light right above the laser eyes.

"NOOOOO!" Dr. Brain screamed. "IN RETROSPECT, PUTTING THAT BLINKING LIGHT THERE WAS NOT SUCH A GREAT IDEA!"

The mechanical spider then started exploding, creating a giant inferno.

And it's quite possible that everyone would have joined Dr. Brain in the fiery pits of hell if not for the fact that Inui noticed that there was a bit of white light, and had been quick enough to take out the remote and change the channel.

Everyone took a moment to establish that they were still alive and Dr. Brain was nowhere in sight.

"Oh wow." Said Choutarou as he stood up and brushed himself off. "I can't believe Dr. Brain figured out my weakness."

"Hey, we're back as our secret identities." Shishido observed.

"Which is good, because I don't really like your superhero costumes." Atobe said as if that's what totally mattered.

"I'm glad my horse is back!" said Taka, and Kirihara agreed, and then put some distance between the two horses.

"I'm glad the timing of that worked out." Inui said, looking at the remote. But it's not like it ever gave him any information so why he keeps looking at it is beyond me. It only read '22'.

"Where are we now?" Eiji wondered.

They looked around, but as far as they could tell, they were in the correct time period and even in sort of a normal-ish looking area, even though it was not recognizable.

"Well, it's impossible for us to gain anything from just standing here." Inui pocked the remote. "We have to find whoever is stuck in this Universe."

"How do we know we're not back in our correct Universe though?" said Momo. "I mean, it looks normal enough around here!"

"In case you haven't noticed, we're still in black and white." Oshitari said. "Which means we are NOT back in our correct Universe. Because in our correct Universe, we would be in color."

"Okay fine." Said Momo, looking dejected. "You don't have to make me feel stupid about it."

"But it WAS stupid." Oshitari said.

"All right, enough." Inui said. "We have to find the people who are here, especially if we want someplace to sleep tonight."

"That's right!" said Kirihara, looking up to see that the sun was pretty close to setting.

"Why do we always come when it's getting dark out?" Momo said.

"I wonder what's messed up about this Universe that makes it unlivable like the rest of ours." Said Eiji.

"Even though it has a seemingly normal appearance, I get the feeling it won't take long for us to find out there is something drastically wrong with it." Inui said.


	24. Girls

Channel 24- Girls

Unfortunately, we must report that they never really did find any of the people stuck in this universe before it became nighttime. So they had to find someplace comfortable to be, and what place more comfortable than the tennis courts?

Yes, they found some tennis courts in this Universe. This made them so very happy but it was bittersweet because they did not have rackets.

Still, they likely wouldn't have been able to play tennis even if they HAD rackets because they were so very tired after all the commotion with Dr. Brain. So they fell asleep on the grass that was near the tennis courts.

When they woke up, they decided to have a powwow and figure out the easiest way to find the people in this Universe.

"It will get progressively harder to find people as time passes." Inui said. "Because people will be more assimilated into their new Universe and seem more natural."

"Especially in a Universe like this one." Shishido added.

"Excuse me, but could—" came a voice behind them, but it abruptly stopped.

Everyone immediately figured that the voice had stopped because of SHOCK from its user. After all, they were dressed quite strangely and there were two horses in their company.

But, as they turned to briefly lie about their situation, they were pleasantly surprised. Or NOT pleasantly surprised, depending on who you are.

"Fuji!" Taka exclaimed, jumping to his feet.

"Taka, it's you!" said Fuji.

"It IS Fuji." Inui commented as the number descended to a 21.

"Fan-freaking-tastic." Said Kirihara with a sigh.

After they went around, said their hellos and explained the whole situation to him, they commented on the fact that Fuji was carrying a tennis bag in front of him with two hands.

"You play tennis in this world?" Momo said, trying not to look TOO jealous.

"Oh yes, I do." Fuji said. "I'm on a team. I come early to practice to meet up with Oishi."

"Oishi's here too?" Eiji gasped.

"He is." Fuji replied.

"You just made my day!" cheered Eiji. "I hope he gets here soon!"

"I was starting to wonder what was going on." Said Fuji. "As you can see, my circumstances make this situation even more uncomfortable than one can imagine."

They all stared at him.

"Well…sure…" said Inui. "But we shouldn't have to stay here long. Once Oishi gets here, we should receive our mission and then we'll be able to leave."

"I can't imagine the mission will be as hard or tedious as saving the world." Choutarou said pleasantly.

"I suppose not." Said Fuji. "But you all remain whatever it is you were in your alternate Universe as you jump to different ones?"

"That's what appears to happen." Oshitari said.

"How unfortunate." Fuji sighed heavily.

"It won't be that bad for you." Said Taka. "You seem pretty well off compared to some other people."

"I do?" Fuji said, looking beyond confused.

"Well yeah!" said Taka. "I mean, look at Oshitari and Atobe! They're in black and white!"

"I guess that would be discerning…" Fuji said, not looking entirely convinced.

"And some people have things that go along with their character." Inui added. "For example, if Atobe or Oshitari were to take a shot in a random direction right now, it would likely hit Kirihara."

"Well, that wouldn't be a HUGE loss." Fuji said.

That's right, he just SAID that.

"I'm going to take a few steps back." Kirihara said.

"Yeah so…" Taka looked around. "What's even different about this Universe? Are you guys just in a different place or what?"

Fuji blinked a few times and opened his mouth to respond, just as he heard a voice call out to him. He turned around to see a girl in a tennis skirt running up to him.

Everyone leaned over and they thought at first, "Fuji has a tennis playing girlfriend?" and looked outrageously shocked.

Of course, after that initial thought, their next realization wasn't that huge of a deal.

"Oh wow." Said Inui, looking at his remote to see that the number once again descended to 20.

"Oh…wow…" said everyone.

"Hi guys!" said the girl.

Oh wow. It was Oishi.

Except he…SHE… had a pony-tail and other… girl things.

"Oishi!" Eiji practically screamed. "You're a girl! What the hell!"

"I know!" said Oishi. "I've been this way for…for how long have we been this way, Fuji?"

"This is the tenth day." Fuji nodded.

"We?" said Taka uneasily.

"Yeah…we." Fuji said.

It was then that he readjusted his tennis bag to reveal that he was also wearing a skirt.

"YOU'RE a girl too?" Momo yelled.

"Well obviously." Fuji said as if it was obvious. But it wasn't obvious.

"This is the WORST alternate Universe we have been to so far." Kirihara said. "And I've only been to two others."

"What are you talking about?" Oishi said, looking confused.

"We're hopping to different alternate Universes." Inui said. "We have to collect people who have been scattered."

"Oh and let me guess." Said Oishi. "We all got scattered ten days ago, right?"

"Right." Said Inui. "There are twenty more people to collect."

"Twenty?" both Fuji and Oishi repeated, sounding a little whiny. Like whiny girls. Cause that's what they were.

"Yes." Said Inui. "Unfortunate, I know. But I have already managed to collect ten people, which means I am a third of the way finished."

"You're a star, Inui." Said Momo with a frown.

"So let's go." Said Oishi. "Why are we waiting around? Let's get out of here and get everyone else!"

"It's not that easy." Inui said. "We receive a mission on the remote control and we must do what we are told. When we complete the mission, we are transported to the next Universe."

"Oh…" Oishi said glumly.

"Cheer up, Oishi!" said Eiji as he ran over and hugged Oishi. "Oh look! I'm taller than you now!"

"Great…" Oishi said sarcastically.

"I think you're the same height, Fuji." Said Taka putting his hand on top of Fuji's head just to check.

"I think I am too." Said Fuji, looking up at Taka as a way of saying, "Please get your hand off my head."

And Taka did what he was told.

"So…you guys are girls and everything…but why are you wearing skirts?" said Shishido. "I mean, there are plenty of girls in the world that don't wear skirts."

"It's our tennis team's uniform." Oishi said regretfully. "At first, we wouldn't wear them for OBVIOUS reasons, but then our coach wouldn't let us practice."

"And we couldn't stand being so close to tennis and not being able to play." Fuji added.

"So you're on a girl's tennis team…" Atobe said.

"Yes." Said Oishi.

Everyone stood there silently as the wind blew by.

"I mean really." Said Oishi. "We're obviously not on the BOY'S tennis team."

"I was just confirming it." Atobe said.

"I feel so sorry for you two!" said Eiji. "I wish I could do something to make it all better!"

"All we have to do is wait for the mission." Inui said, looking at the remote control.

Everyone leaned over to look at the remote control as well.

The large group hung around being utterly quiet as they continued to stare at the screen.

People walking by looked at them questioningly. I mean, just think of what they all look like. Wouldn't you look at them questioningly too?

They were interrupted, however, because the rest of the girl's tennis team arrived at that exact moment.

"Please move away from the courts!" said the crazy feminist coach who was obviously one of those crazy feminists. She shooed away everyone who had a Y chromosome and her team got on the courts. "You two!"

She pointed at Fuji and Oishi.

"Are you practicing or not?" she said.

"I guess…we have to go practice." Oishi said to everyone else.

"Tell us as soon as you get the mission!" Fuji added as the two of them ran to the courts.

Everyone watched them go and then looked at each other.

"How long do we have to wait for this mission?" Choutarou asked.

"Not too long I hope." Said Kirihara, but his comment was only sort of half there because he was trying to get in between the two horses. "God DAMN it! I can't sand your horse!"

He roughly pushed Horse away, and just as he was about to freak out about that, Taka came over, grabbed the reins and calmed him down.

"It's not his fault." Taka said, looking as though HE had been the one who had just been struck.

"Besides, she's the one coming onto him." Said Choutarou.

"What are you talking about?" demanded Kirihara.

EVERYONE gave Choutarou a quizzical look after that comment.

"…Sorry?" Choutarou said, looking embarrassed.

"Can you talk to animals too?" Atobe inquired.

"Um…a little bit?" Choutarou suggested.

"So what?" said Shishido. "Leave Choutarou alone!"

"Thanks, Shishido." Said Choutarou.

"Enough." Inui commanded. "We're receiving the mission."

"I want it to hurry up!" Eiji said. "So we can complete it, leave faster, find everyone else and Oishi can turn back into a guy!"

Everyone practically dove in to see the mission they would have to get in such a normal-ish world.

"Win a tennis match." They all droned together.

"That won't be too hard at all!" said Taka. "How lucky!"

The group all looked up to observe the girl's tennis team practice.

They watched in horror as Oishi and Fuji volleyed the ball back and forth to each other in such a fashion that they had only recently picked up a tennis racket for the first time.


	25. The Match

Channel 25- The Match

"So…I guess you saw how bad we are." Oishi said as the huge group all sat on the grass beside the tennis courts after the practice was over.

Everyone else was staring at them.

"Yeah." Said Shishido, since he was the first one who acquired the strength to speak.

"It was a little hard not to see." Atobe commented.

"It's just not fair." Said Fuji with a sigh. "We get the opportunity to play tennis in this alternate Universe we ended up in, but of course it would turn out that we're bad at tennis."

"Well, you're girls after all." Momo pointed out.

"We know." Said Oishi and Fuji at the same time.

"So about this mission." Kirihara said. "All you guys have to do is win at a tennis match."

"But have you seen us?" Fuji said. "We played another school last week, and I lost." He paused when he didn't get an immediate reaction. "I LOST. ME."

"We're just in shock." Taka clarified.

"In that case, I have a plan." Inui said. "The two of you play doubles against two of us and we will lose on purpose."

"Right!" said Choutarou. "That's a good plan!"

"That could work." Said Oishi. "Do any of you guys have rackets?"

"Er…no…" said all the males.

"That's all right, I have an extra." Oishi pulled another racket out of his bag, and Fuji did the same.

"Who's going to play?" Fuji asked.

"I know I'M not." Said Kirihara. "As much as I want to play tennis, I don't want to play against Fuji, even if he is a girl and he sucks."

Then he paused.

"Well actually, I DO want to play." He stood up and held out his hand to accept one of the extra rackets.

"I don't want to play against you." Fuji said, turning away from Kirihara.

"Well fine." Said Kirihara, turning away as well.

"I'll play against you, Oishi!" said Eiji. "And I'll lose with all my might!"

"Okay, Eiji." Said Oishi, giving him the spare racket. "I really appreciate you throwing a game just to help me!"

"Well, I can't stand that you have to suffer like this!" said Eiji. "Now who's going to play doubles with me?"

"Taka, you should play." Said Momo.

"Why me?" Taka asked.

"Because!" Momo replied. "Oishi plays doubles with Eiji, and Taka usually plays doubles with you. Since Eiji is playing, you might as well play too."

"I'm not going to be able to throw a game…" Taka pointed out, looking a little embarrassed.

"That's true." Inui said. "Once Taka picks up a racket, he will become quite competitive and that is the last thing we need right now."

"I'll play." Atobe stood up.

"Atobe, you won't be able to throw a game." Oshitari said, grabbing onto Atobe's arm and pulling him back.

"YOU won't be able to throw a game either." Atobe retorted.

"Very well." Said Oshitari since he knew it was true.

"I could play." Choutarou said. "I usually don't play that well anyway."

"Don't say that, Choutarou!" said Shishido, looking SO offended. "You're a great tennis player!"

"I think Ootori and I would make a good doubles pair anyway!" said Eiji. "Good idea! The two of us versus the two of you!"

"This should go by quickly too." Said Oishi. "Because the girl's team only plays up to five."

"What could possibly get done in only five games?" said Shishido as everyone else lined up on the other side of the fence to watch.

"How about you serve, Oishi?" Eiji called from the other side of the court. "Ladies first, after all!"

"Eiji, don't give me a hard time!" Oishi said.

He threw the ball up into the air and hit the net with it.

"Oh wow." Said Oishi, looking depressed.

"It's all right." Fuji assured him.

"Here!" Eiji threw the ball back to Oishi after he had sprinted up to the net and retrieved it for him.

Oishi tried to serve it again but he only ended up failing. AGAIN.

"Sorry guys…" said Oishi sadly. "I'm not very good at serving. Or anything else really."

"Okay, okay!" said Eiji, retrieving the ball AGAIN. "Those didn't count! They were just warm ups! How about you serve instead, Fuji?"

"Very well." Fuji said, retreating to the baseline and receiving the ball from Eiji.

He got in the position to make an underhand serve, and a few people from behind the fence breathed a sigh of relief.

"At least he can still do the Disappearing Serve." Said Inui.

"Actually," Fuji turned around and faced them since he had heard them. "I just can't do overhand serves so I have to do underhand ones."

"Oh." Said Inui.

Fuji did a lame little serve, but at least it made it all the way to the other side.

Eiji and Choutarou both stood there and watched it bounce twice without even pretending to try to keep it in play.

"Good job!" said Choutarou. "A couple more like that and we'll be out of here in no time!"

"This is so painful." Said Fuji as he got in position to underhand serve again. "Especially with everyone watching me."

"Just ignore them." Said Oishi. "We'll be out of here soon enough. What Ootori just said, remember?"

"I know, I know." Fuji said as he did another little lame underhand serve, except this time it looked like it was about to go out.

"Save it!" Eiji called to Choutarou.

"Got it!" Choutarou said as he backed up to where the ball was going and then lightly tapped it so it would make it back to the other side. However, Choutarou's light tap caused the ball to burst into flames and ZING by them before anyone even realized that he had hit it.

The ball hit the court right in front of where Oishi was standing and actually got lodged in the ground.

"We're supposed to be throwing the game!" Eiji said.

"I barely touched it!" Choutarou said.

"Choutarou, it's your super strength!" Shishido said. He wasn't watching the match because of eager anticipation that they would soon leave the Universe. Oh no. He was watching CHOUTAROU and hoping to give him pointers if anything distressed him. Kind of like right now.

"That's right." Said Choutarou.

"Super strength?" Oishi inquired.

"They're superheroes." Momo said.

"Figures." Said Oishi. "We could have been superheroes, Fuji."

"We could have been a great many things, Oishi." Fuji sighed.

"Maybe we should sub Ootori out." Oshitari suggested.

"That would be the best thing to do at this point." Atobe said. "Ootori, to make sure that doesn't happen again, we're going to sub you out."

"I understand." Choutarou said. He looked as though he had just done something so very wrong and should be ashamed of himself, but Shishido assured him that he was not at fault.

"Momo, you play." Inui said.

"All right!" said Momo, looking excited.

"But remember not to try." Inui reminded him.

"Obviously!" said Momo as he took the racket from Choutarou and ran over to the other side of the court with Eiji.

"All right, you guys still have the serve!" Eiji said. "Er…you girls!"

"Eiji, stop bringing that up every two minutes." Oishi pleaded.

"I'm sorry." Said Eiji. "But it's just so distracting!"

"Tell me about it." Oishi rolled his eyes.

"All right, here comes another serve." Fuji said as he gave another little underhand serve that almost looked like it wasn't going to go over the net but it managed at the very last second.

"Good serve, Fuji!" said Eiji, giving him the thumbs up. "I would have totally thought that wasn't going to make it if I was playing in an actual match!"

"Don't lie to me." Said Fuji. "Please."

"Oh." Said Eiji, lowering his head.

"I think they could do without the commentary." Momo said quietly to Eiji. "This has got to be hard enough for them as it is!"

"I'm just trying to help!" whined Eiji.

"I know." Said Momo.

"Maybe I can't play in this match after all." Said Eiji. He looked up to all the people watching. "Someone switch with me! This just isn't working."

"Shishido, you play." Atobe commanded before anyone could volunteer.

"…Okay?" said Shishido.

"Remember to do a bad job." Atobe reminded him as Eiji handed off the racket.

"I know!" said Shishido as he went to the court where Momo was.

One by one, everyone tried their hand at playing against Fuji and Oishi in their extremely effeminate states. But one by one, they were all shut down until they came to the realization that they just couldn't play against them while they were like that.

They sat down outside the tennis courts once again.

"So that's not going to work." Oishi said, about to sit cross legged, but Fuji quickly reminded him that that was a no no.

"You guys have to play against a real team." Said Inui. "But you obviously can't legitimately win. That much is clear."

"Our team's next match is in a week." Oishi said despairingly.

"A week?" everyone gasped.

"Yeah…" Oishi said sadly.

"Maybe we can find a team that will play against you before then." Kirihara said.

"Not likely." Said Fuji. "The only tennis team that's even remotely nearby is our school's boy's team."

"And they're sketchy." Oishi added. "One time, they got back from a match early and they all just stood around and watched us practice."

"It was awkward." Fuji agreed.

"Well, that might work." Said Inui as if Fuji and Oishi didn't just say that they were totally creeped out by the boy's team. "We could get two of them to play against you guys."

"If we couldn't even win against any of you, what makes you think we could win against them?" Oishi questioned.

"They might feel obligated to lose against you since you're girls." Atobe said.

"Why would they want to play tennis with us though?" said Fuji. "They would gain nothing from playing against us."

"If you flirt with them, they might want to play." Taka suggested.

Oishi and Fuji slowly turned their heads and looked at Taka, their eyes narrowing.

"Never mind," he said nervously. "Forget I said anything!"

"Taka might be on to something, actually." Said Inui. "That way, they would have extra incentive to lose against you, as long as the two of you use your girlish charms to swoon them."

"You're kidding, right?" said Oishi helplessly.

"No, it could work." Said Inui, standing up and looking determined. "I will make it work."

"I have the feeling that this is NOT going to work…" Oishi said, putting his face in his hands.


	26. A Date

Channel 26- A Date

Essentially everyone who wasn't on Seigaku had decided to take a day off as the eleventh morning rolled around. The rest of the group was determined to get Oishi and Fuji to win against someone on the boy's tennis team even if it killed them. And by 'them' I mean Fuji and Oishi.

It was convenient for them because the girl's tennis team did not have practice on that particular day while the boy's team did. So they evaluated that this was the best time to do something.

They had all gone back to a house that belonged to either Fuji or Oishi in order to change clothes and drop the horses off just so they wouldn't look quite as strange. They knew that even though they would be magically transferred back into their alternate universe clothing when they jumped again, they figured it was good to look slightly normal while they were in a slightly normal universe.

Inui still wore his patch, though, because he was probably totally terrified of what might have been (or not have been) underneath it.

"All right," said Eiji as the group of six hid behind a bush and spied on the boy's tennis team practicing. "It'll be no problem."

"Easy for you to say." Said both Fuji and Oishi.

"Those two right there." Inui pointed at two of the boys that where practicing together. "They're a doubles team. You should woo them."

"Why do we have to do this again?" Oishi whined.

"Because it likely won't work for you guys to win against us anyway." Said Taka. "Right? I mean, in the Knight Universe when Inui and Momo tried to kidnap the princess and me and Eiji saved her, it didn't work."

"That's a good point, Taka." Inui commented. "Even I hadn't thought of it. But I'm sure I would have eventually."

"What are you guys waiting for?" Momo said to Oishi and Fuji. "Go out there and get them to play tennis with you and lose!"

"But what if they don't lose on purpose?" Oishi said.

"Way to look at the glass half empty!" said Eiji.

"No, really." Said Fuji. "What if their manly testosterone takes over and they go into that mode where they just can't lose against a girl?"

"Oh come on!" said Momo. "It's not like that at all! I bet if I played against a girl then I'd definitely let her win."

"I wouldn't intentionally let anyone beat me." Said Fuji, a shadow covering half of his face. "Ever."

"Well, that's YOU Fuji!" said Eiji. "I know Oishi's different from that!"

"Yeah, but that's me." Said Oishi.

"You guys just aren't making any sense at all!" said Momo. "Just go out there and get this done so we can get to the next Universe and subsequently make it to our OWN Universe in which you guys get to actually be guys again!"

With that, Momo gave both Fuji and Oishi the boot in the direction of the tennis courts where the boys were practicing.

"Are we sure that there's no other way to do this?" Taka asked as he watched Fuji and Oishi dejectedly walk in that direction.

"I'm sure there are a hundred ways to do this." Inui admitted.

"But this is the most fun for us!" said Eiji with a laugh.

"Oh." Taka said.

They all watched as Fuji and Oishi both carried on a conversation with the boys for a little, and then retreat back to the bush where they were all disappointedly waiting.

"You were supposed to seduce them into playing a tennis match with you!" said Momo.

"They said that they were too busy with practice today." Oishi reported. "But they didn't have practice on Saturday."

"When's Saturday?" Eiji said.

"Tomorrow." Oishi answered.

"So play tennis with them tomorrow then." Said Inui. "It's unfortunate that we must stay an extra day, but we'll survive."

"Well actually we turned them down." Fuji said.

"WHY?" demanded the four others.

"Because they said they'd only play tennis with us tomorrow if we went on a date with them tonight." Fuji answered.

"Get your butts back over there and tell them that you accept!" Momo commanded.

"There's no way we're going out with them!" said Oishi.

"It'll be one night of horror and then it will be over." Said Inui. "This time tomorrow will be in the next Universe and you'll have forgotten about the date."

"Except we'd both still be girls, and therefore reminded of it every minute of the day." Oishi reminded him.

"Oishi, it's the only way!" said Eiji.

"But didn't you guys say that…" Taka started but then he trailed off when he noticed they were all getting their elbows ready to subtly attack him.

"Couldn't we travel to another school and look for someone who will play against us?" Fuji tried. "Or find some girls who are even worse than we are?"

"I suppose we could do that." Said Inui. "Do you have the ability to drive in this Universe?"

"Um…no." Fuji said. "But couldn't we take the bus?"

"So this is your plan…" Momo said. "To ride around in a bus randomly until we find some people playing tennis and then challenge them to a match, hoping to beat them?"

"Um…" Fuji and Oishi looked at each other.

"Just accept their kind offer!" said Momo. "I'm sure they'll be very nice when it comes to play in the match tomorrow!"

"Well if we go through all this and they don't end up letting us win then I will personally make sure your lives are living hells." Fuji said.

And the scariest thing about it was that he had a perfectly content smile on the entire time he said it.

For the afternoon, everyone (including Hyoutei and Kirihara) went over to Oishi's fake house where his fake family was.

"How long will your friends be staying here?" Oishi's fake mom asked as she poked her head in the little mini-apartment they had downstairs in the basement especially for parties.

"Um…the night?" Oishi tried.

"The night?" his fake mom said, looking concerned. "All these boys?"

"Uh…yeah…is that okay?" Oishi asked.

His fake mom sort of just mumbled something under her breath and then closed the door.

Oishi turned back to everyone else. "Yeah…I don't know if it's going to be okay with her." He reported.

"That's all right." Said Taka. "If all of this works out properly then we'll be gone tomorrow afternoon and you'll never even have to see her again."

"Good point." Oishi said with a nod.

"So let's go over what is happening tonight." Inui picked up his notes. "The boys from the tennis team will pick you up at eight o'clock. First, you will be going to dinner. Then—"

"THEN?" Fuji repeated, his voice elevated ever so slightly. "No. I'm sorry. But the night is ending right after dinner."

"That won't work." Said Atobe.

"Of course it will." Fuji said.

"Then you guys REALLY have to lay on the charm." Said Momo. "Fast."

"Easily." Fuji said.

"Um…maybe we should see a movie too…?" Oishi said, twiddling his fingers.

"No, dinner will be enough." Said Fuji. "We should be home by eight thirty at the latest."

"All right but don't rush anything or else they might not play tennis with you tomorrow." Kirihara warned.

"Hey, the deal was that if we went on a date then they'd play tennis, so they HAVE to no matter what, right?" said Oishi.

"Err…" everyone said slowly.

"By the way," Inui said suddenly. "Do you two even know their names?"

"Not…no…" Oishi frowned.

"Wait, what are your names?" Shishido asked. "I mean… your girl names."

"Oh well…apparently we're both Shuuko." Fuji answered.

"What?" said Shishido. "Why?"

"Because…" Fuji said. "Shuusuke. Shuuichiro. They're both essentially 'Shuu' with a boy's name ending."

"That's lame." Said Shishido as if it affected him at all.

"But you all should just call us Fuji and Oishi anyway, so it won't matter." Fuji said.

"Oishi!" said Eiji. "Hey, what are you going to wear tonight?"

"What…am I going to wear?" Oishi said.

"Yeah!" said Eiji. "You have a hot date in just an hour or so and you have to wear something, unless you have other plans…"

"Eiji, please." Said Oishi. "Get your mind out of the gutter."

"What?" said Eiji. "What did you think I was talking about? I don't even know! You get YOUR mind out of the gutter!"

"Well…no, I don't know what I'm going to wear tonight." Oishi sighed. "I hadn't even thought about it."

"Hey, can we follow you around and spy on you all night?" Eiji asked eagerly.

"Eiji, you're making this VERY difficult." Oishi admitted. "Just so you know."

"Oishi…I'm sorry…" said Eiji, bowing his head in shame. "I'm just trying to be nice and act as though nothing's wrong…"

"But something is wrong, Eiji." Said Oishi. "I'm a girl. So is Fuji."

"In addition to that, I am still without color." Atobe reported.

"At least you got to keep your manhood." Oishi griped.

"That much is true." Atobe nodded. "I don't know what I would have done if I had ended up in this Universe."

"I probably would have killed myself." Oshitari said.

"Hm…I as well." Atobe nodded. "It sure is lucky for us and everyone else that we did not end up in this Universe."

"Lucky?" Fuji inquired but the others urged him to keep himself under control.

"You know, Shishido…" said Choutarou to his best friend ever. "It's odd. We were only superheroes for about eight or nine days, but now I feel like I'm going into withdrawal because I haven't fought crime in so long."

"Hey, you know what?" said Shishido with a slight laugh. "I felt the same way but I didn't want to say anything because I thought I would sound crazy!"

"Wow!" said Choutarou. "How great! Does anyone else miss their Universe?"

"None of us were anywhere long enough to really grow attached to it." Said Momo with a shrug as he gestured to himself, Inui and the Knights.

"I don't really miss it." Atobe said to Oshitari.

Oshitari shook his head. "It was nothing special." He said.

"I'm glad I left MY Universe." Said Kirihara. "I despised it there."

"I guess we're alone on this one, Shishido." Said Choutarou with a smile.

"Well, I don't exactly miss the UNIVERSE…" Shishido said. "Mostly just what we did IN the Universe. Frankly, I'd rather be back in my own Universe playing tennis and going to school and stuff like that."

"Oh of course!" said Choutarou. "But it was nice to fight crime and be around people who loved us unconditionally!" Then he pondered and frowned. "Well, actually, there were also some people who hated us unconditionally too."

"Like Squidbeard." Shishido said.

"Ahhh…" Choutarou nodded his head in remembrance of Squidbeard.

"Don't mind us, but we're only trying to have a relevant conversation." Fuji said, looking crossly at the Silver Pair.

"What?" they both said.

"In any case, you two should get ready." Inui decided. "Your dates will be here soon and you have to make sure you do everything right."

"What are you guys going to do?" Oishi asked. "Hang around here until we get back? I don't know if my fake mom will be too crazy about that. She didn't really want you here in the first place, let alone here WITHOUT me."

"Don't worry, we'll take care of her." Said Oshitari.

"No!" said Eiji. "I won't let you kill Oishi's fake mom!"

"Oh, I'm sure he wasn't thinking about THAT." Said Oishi with a laugh.

Oshitari only sat there, cleared his throat and then readjusted himself in his seat.

"Oh right." He said. "Of course not."

"Um…don't kill her." Said Oishi. "Seriously. Even though she's not my real mom, she's a nice lady and I have to admit that I would be distraught if she was dead when I came home."

"Fine, fine." Said Oshitari. "_I _won't kill her."

"No one kill her." Oishi said.

Atobe sighed. "Too much emphasis on the 'I', Oshitari." He said.

"Sorry…" said Oshitari.

"You two are insane." Said Momo. "I think you DO miss your Universe where you could kill people with no consequence."

"Maybe." Said Atobe. "Maybe not."

"It's almost eight o'clock." Inui reported. "Please. Oishi, Fuji. Do your best. We will be sending you good vibes all night."

"One hour." Said Fuji. "Maybe two."

"All right." Said Inui. "We will be sending you good vibes until you get home, however long it may take."

"I'll try to explain the situation to my fake mom…" Oishi stood up. He and Fuji left the room to get ready for their…DUN DUN DUUUUUUN. DATE!


	27. Good Acting

Channel 27- Good Acting

While Oishi and Fuji were on their date everyone else stayed in the house and decided to watch some television.

"You know what I sort of just thought about?" Kirihara said during a commercial.

"What's that?" said everyone else.

"What if we forgot someone in the Cowboy Universe?" he said.

"What makes you say something like that?" Inui asked.

"I don't know." Said Kirihara. "Probably the fact that every other Universe we've been to there's always been two people. But for some reason I was all by myself."

"I considered that initially." Inui said. "But, if you've noticed, we only receive our mission for each Universe after everyone is assembled together. Our mission was revealed to us not long after we found you. Therefore it is safe to assume that there was no one else in the Cowboy Universe."

"If so…we're terribly sorry for them." Momo said.

"It better not be anyone from MY team." Said Atobe.

"I would hate to think that it was Tezuka or Ryoma or Kaidou." Said Taka.

"Hopefully it's someone lame like Tachibana." Said Shishido.

"There's no need to even worry about it." Said Inui. "We did not leave anyone behind. It's fine."

"But if we DID…" said Eiji. "Would we be able to get back to our original Universe?"

"What?" said Inui, looking slightly confused.

"You know, the counter." Said Eiji. "Would we be able to get back with it still having a number 1 on it?"

"I do not know that." Inui said. "Believe me, this has really never happened to me before."

"I actually DON'T believe you." Said Atobe. "You seem too comfortable with the situation and are handling it too well."

"I'm not even going to justify that comment with a response." Inui decided.

Just then, the door opened and THERE WAS OISHI AND FUJI! YAY!

"Oishi and Fuji!" everyone exclaimed.

"Everyone." Fuji and Oishi less than exclaimed.

"How did it go?" Eiji asked, running over to Oishi.

"Eiji, I'm sorry, but I just don't even want to talk about it." Oishi shook his head as he sat down on the floor.

"It's almost ten." Taka said, checking a clock. "Did you guys do something besides dinner?"

"They offered to play tennis so kindly." Fuji said.

"Oh?" everyone jumped to their feet and Inui pulled out the remote.

"Don't." Fuji put his hand up. "Just don't."

"It didn't go so well, I guess?" Choutarou asked tenderly.

"The courts were locked and closed." Oishi said. "Of course they knew that but acted all surprised when we got there."

"It's like pulling the 'out of gas' routine, except it's just a touch more pathetic." Fuji explained.

Everyone waited for them to go on.

"So…then what?" Shishido asked.

"You know." Said Fuji.

Everyone paused, then gasped. "NO!" they yelled.

"Yes!" Fuji and Oishi whined.

"They…didn't!" everyone went on.

"They did!" Fuji and Oishi said.

"OISHI!" Eiji yelled, hugging Oishi.

"I…can't…" Taka started. "This is all my fault! I never should have said anything!"

"I know, it was ridiculous." Fuji said. "I scraped my knee on the way down." He pointed at said knee.

The others looked like they were going to say some words of comfort, but then they just looked confused instead.

"…Wait, what exactly happened?" Momo asked.

"We weren't going to leave without playing tennis so they offered to help us climb the fence." Fuji said. "And I lost my footing on the way down on the other side and scraped my knee."

"…Oh…" said the group slowly.

"So we're starting the game." Oishi said.

"All right…so…" Inui raised his remote control again.

"Not quite." Oishi said. "The courts are closed, and apparently the police in this town don't take kindly to people using the courts when they are closed."

"The…police…?" stuttered the male portion of the room.

"They showed up." Fuji said. "So we had to scale the fence again before our match could be completed and run like we've never run before."

"Did you…get away all right?" Kirihara asked.

"Yes, fortunately." Said Oishi. "But I never want to see them again!"

"You have to." Said Momo. "That was the whole point of the date! So you guys could play tennis with them tomorrow!"

"Supposedly." Said Fuji. "They said to meet at the courts at ten in the morning."

"That's perfect then." Atobe said. "WHAT is the problem?"

"I don't know…they're just sketchy…that's all…" Oishi whined.

"OH OISHI!" said Eiji.

The next morning, at about ten, everyone followed Oishi and Fuji to the tennis courts. They were both full of anticipation as they waited for the two boys from the tennis team to show up. The men hid behind some bushes that were beside the courts.

"I hope this works." Said Inui, looking down at the remote, and then up at Fuji. "For our sakes."

"Yeah…" agreed the others.

They watched as the boys tennis team arrived and struck up a conversation with Oishi and Fuji. It seemed casual and cheerful.

"So far so good." Choutarou noted.

"Let's hope they charmed them enough last night." Taka said.

The quartet took to the courts.

"I'll serve first, is that okay with you?" Fuji called.

"That's all right!" they both answered.

"Okay, but I have to warn you, I'm no good at this! Tee-hee!"

Everyone in the bushes looked at each other uneasily.

"He is way too good at this." Oshitari said.

Fuji did his not-so-famous underhand serve and pretty much failed in every respect to get it over the net.

"Oops!" said Fuji with a giggle. "That always happens! I am such a klutz!"

"It's all right, don't worry about it!" called one of the boys who will be known as Ay, while his comrade will be known as Bee.

Bee went to the net and retrieved the ball, tossing it back to Fuji.

"Okay, here it goes, please go easy on us!" said Fuji.

Everyone watched in silent wonder as Fuji did a little better at serving, and eventually got the ball over the net a few times. Ay returned one of the serves but it was a very soft little bounce that went directly to Oishi who hit it back to the other side.

It was going to go out of bounds but Bee touched it with the tip of his racket before it did.

"Because you touched it, that means we get the point, right?" said Oishi, trying to use a ditzy voice but not succeeding quite as well as Fuji.

"That's right!" said Bee. "You girls are better than you said you were! We were expecting an easy game!"

"You two!" said Fuji. "You don't have to let us win!"

"We're not!" said Bee.

"All right, then I'll use my powerful serve this time!" said Fuji as he collected the ball.

"We'll try our best to return it!" said Ay.

Fuji did another serve that was essentially exactly the same as his last one. Ay pretended to miss it and it went out of bounds.

"Wow, that WAS a powerful serve!" said Ay.

"That's what I said, wasn't it?" said Fuji. "I've been working all week on that one just for this match!"

"I could tell!" said Ay.

Everyone in the bush had their mouths dropped to the ground.

"I can't believe they're actually doing it." Said Shishido. "I had my doubts. And I thought after watching this, I would be able to make fun of them. I was excited to watch so I could make fun of them. But now I have a newfound respect for them matched by no one else."

"I sort of worship them." Momo admitted.

Even Atobe had to admit that they were amazing.

"The chances of this actually working were so slim…" Inui looked slightly perplexed that they were actually succeeding. "But they are… really… they are incredible."

A little while later, when Ay was serving, he bounced the ball twice on the court.

"I can't believe you girls are about to beat us!" said Ay. "You should dress up like boys and join our team! We could use skills like yours!"

"Oh boys always take it easy when they play against girls!" said Oishi.

"Hey, it might have been true at first, but I really am going all out." Bee said.

"One more point and we win, right?" Fuji said.

"We won't let you win!" said Ay.

"Oh, no?" said Fuji. "Because I thought that maybe we'd be able to do something fun afterwards…"

Ay and Bee looked at each other.

"Everyone has an off day, right?" Ay said, throwing the ball up in the air and hitting it, but it went out of bounds.

"Game set and match!" said Oishi.

"Yay!" cheered Fuji as he slapped Oishi high five.

"That's it." Said Inui as he jumped out of the bush just as the white light started engulfing them.

"Hey wait…!" said Ay and Bee, wondering what the hell Inui was doing hiding in a bush.

But no one had an opportunity to even think of an excuse because the next thing they knew, they were at the courts all alone.

"What happened to them?" Choutarou questioned as they all entered the courts where Fuji and Oishi were still standing.

"Did we even switch Universes, or did we just kill the two guys?" Kirihara questioned.

"Well, we must have switched Universes because we're back in our clothes from our alternate Universes." Taka said, looking down to see he was in his armor again, and then caught sight of his horse and Kirihara's horse both walking towards the courts.

"What's this?" said Oishi, putting his hands on his hips and gesturing to the fact that he and Fuji were still in their school tennis team uniforms complete with the skirts AND the rackets. "Are we going to be dressed like this the whole time?"

"…Probably…" said Eiji, trying to stifle his laughter.

"Wait a moment." Inui commanded, silencing everyone as he gazed as their surroundings.

"What is it?" Shishido asked.

"Am I the only one who has noticed…" Inui started as he wandered around the courts. "We are…"

"We're at…our tennis courts…" Momo finished.

"Your tennis courts?" Atobe questioned.

"Our school's courts!" Oishi said. "We're back in our original Universe?"

"No, that's impossible." Inui said, looking at the remote. "There's still twenty more people we have to find, not to mention that none of us have turned back to normal. You of all people should know something like that."

"I guess…" Oishi pouted.

"We are probably just in an alternate Universe that takes place at our school." Inui concluded.

"What sort of alternate Universe could this be then?" said Kirihara.

"Excuse me!" came a female voice behind them. "Please. Would you mind getting off my team's courts?"

Everyone turned around to see a girl standing before them with a tennis racket in her hand and a Seigaku Regular Jersey. But the BOY'S kind. She was absolutely gorgeous and had the perfect figure. Pale digits played with her long silver hair that fell passed her waist, though it must have been much longer because it was wrapped it up with a golden bandana. Lazily she glanced around, emerald orbs full of exhaustion. Pure boredom filled her day and she found herself fatigued.

"YOUR team's tennis courts?" said Momo. "These courts belong to the Seigaku boy's tennis team!"

"I am the captain of the Seigaku boy's tennis team!" said the girl. "So I don't see what right you have to call it not mine!"

"Who are you?" said Inui, double checking his remote to see that the number had not descended.

"I am the first year captain of the Seigaku tennis team!" said the girl. "My name is Atobe Sutefuani!"

Everyone raised their eyebrows at the girl, and then looked at Atobe.

"WHAT." Said Atobe.


	28. Atobe Sutefuani

Channel 28- Atobe Sutefuani

"That girl is NOT related to me." Said Atobe as he stormed away from the tennis courts in an enraged fashion as everyone tried to chase after him and calm him down.

After Sutefuani's outrageous claim, Atobe had pretty much thrown a temper tantrum and everyone decided it was a good time to leave before he whipped out his gun and accidentally killed Kirihara.

"Atobe, stop!" said Choutarou as he grabbed onto Atobe's shoulders and held him in place because, let's face it, only super strength was going to stop him at this point.

"Yes, think rationally." Said Inui. "Obviously this is an alternate universe in which you have a twelve-year-old sister that attends our school."

Then he paused.

"And is the captain of the boy's tennis team."

He adjusted his glasses.

"That is illogical." He established.

"Damn right it is!" said Atobe. "I am an only child! It's been that way for as long as I can remember."

"Of course." Said Oshitari. "But this is an alternate Universe."

"Exactly right." Said Fuji. "Oishi and I were never girls before going to an alternate Universe. And now you have a sister. How cute."

"It's not cute." Said Atobe. "And why would she be on the boy's tennis team? Let alone the boy's SEIGAKU tennis team?"

"We have as much information as you do." Said Oishi. "We're all still trying to figure out this big mess."

"I don't know why…but the thought of my parents having a second child just sends shivers down my spine." Atobe said.

"Rest assured that they didn't REALLY." Said Eiji.

"All right…fine." Said Atobe. "Let's just find whoever is in this messed up Universe and get out of here."

"Maybe if we head back to the tennis courts, we can try to get some information out of this Sutefuani character." Taka suggested.

"Oh I know." Said Choutarou with a slight laugh.

Everyone stared at him as he chuckled for a moment or so before realizing that he was the center of attention.

"Um…yes?" Choutarou said, looking concerned that they had nothing else to look at.

"You just said 'oh I know'." Shishido reminded him.

"Oh." Choutarou lowered his head. "Sorry…it was… just that… I didn't mean…" He hesitantly pointed at Kirihara's horse. "She's got a sense of humor, that's all."

"Stop that!" Kirihara ordered.

"It is kind of weird…" the others came to a general consensus.

"I'm sorry!" Choutarou buried his face in his hands.

"It's all right, Choutarou!" said Shishido, patting Choutarou on the back. "They just don't understand, that's all! It's nothing YOU did!"

"Thank you Shishido." Said Choutarou, sniffling a little bit.

Shishido glared at the rest of the group with this face that said, "You all should be ashamed of yourselves!"

"All right…about the courts…" Inui said. "The best course of action is to find out who the odd person is, and then get our mission."

"Agreed." Everyone…agreed.

So they trudged back over to the courts, Atobe trying to suppress the Fist of Doom. When they got closer, they could tell that there were definitely more people there than just Sutefuani. Momo pulled out his telescope so he could see before everyone else.

"There's Kaidou!" he exclaimed.

"How lucky!" said Taka.

"Oh wait." Said Momo slowly as he squinted through the telescope. "Wait, wait, wait."

"What?" everyone else said.

"There's uh…me…and Inui and Taka and Eiji…" Momo pointed to each person at the courts as he narrated.

"WHAT?" they all repeated, picking up their pace a little bit until they were back at the courts.

Sure enough, much to their terrified surprise, they found that every member of the Seigaku Regular Team was there practicing, along with Sutefuani. Everyone except Ryoma and Tezuka, that is.

"What the hell?" said Shishido, looking back and forth between the people standing next to him and the people standing before him.

"There's two of everyone." Oshitari concluded.

"This is odd." Said Inui. "But no odder than that girl being Atobe's sister."

"No, that is WAY odder." Said Atobe, crossing his arms.

"We should probably pull Kaidou aside." Said Inui. "After all, he's the only one who is over there and not over here at the same time."

"Hey!" called Sutefuani from the courts as she frowned at all the people watching them again. "Are you guys from some kind of freakish tennis team that dress up like nerds?"

All the Regulars who had gathered around threw their heads back and laughed as if it was funny at all.

"This is a CLOSED practice." Said Sutefuani, getting serious. "I won't have you scouting out my team."

"Her team, her team…she keeps saying that." Said Oishi. "If she's the captain, where's Tezuka?"

"Tezuka?" said the FAKE Eiji as he came over to the fence. "Tezuka Kunimitsu?"

"Who else?" said Oishi.

"He's the captain of Hyoutei." Fake Oishi replied.

"NO." said Atobe immediately. "NO HE'S NOT."

"What about Atobe Keigo?" asked Oshitari.

"My name is Atobe SUTEFUANI." Said Sutefuani. "I don't know any Keigo. I'm an only child."

"What…kind of…" Atobe stuttered, dropping to his knees. "Horrible… alternate Universe is this… where… I… do not… exist?"

"Calm down, Atobe." Shishido said. "It's not that big of a deal!"

"NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL?" Atobe practically yelled at the top of his lungs. "TEZUKA…is the captain of Hyoutei! And I do not exist! THAT IS A BIG DEAL."

"Is there anyway we could speak to Kaidou there?" Inui asked randomly, pointing at Kaidou.

"Kaidou, do you know these people?" Fake Inui said to Kaidou.

"No." said Kaidou, crossing his arms. "I've never seen them before in my life."

"Hang on, I have a question." Said Kirihara, turning everyone around to address them personally. "Why is it that none of them happen to notice that you guys look exactly like them?"

"Perhaps we do not look exactly like them TO THEM." Inui said.

"This is just weird." Said Taka. "This Universe doesn't make any sense."

"NONE AT ALL." Atobe said, sounding the more appalled than the most appalled person in the world.

"And if that Kaidou there doesn't recognize us, then I bet he's not the Kaidou from our Universe." Fuji said, totally disregarding Atobe.

"That is a good observation." Inui said. "We have to find Ryoma, and if that doesn't work out then we have to go to Hyoutei to talk to Tezuka."

"Tezuka would so not ever be the captain of Hyoutei." Said Atobe.

Everyone wanted to yell, "GET OVER YOURSELF!" but they figured it would be a fruitless gesture so they didn't bother.

So they politely turned back to where Sutefuani was patiently waiting.

"Where is Echizen Ryoma?" Inui tried.

"You know something?" said Sutefuani said, looking around. "I was just wondering that myself! Where is Ryoma? If he keeps this up then I won't even let him come and watch our big game against Hyoutei."

"Of which…TEZUKA is the captain?" said Atobe who was now in resentful mode.

"So Ryoma IS here in this Uni…team?" Eiji said.

"Of course he is!" said Sutefuani. "But he's been acting strange recently."

"Strange?" everyone became very interested.

"Okay…when did this strange behavior start?" asked Kirihara.

"You know what?" said Sutefuani. "I'm getting a little irritated with all of you hanging around our tennis court asking us weird questions about my team and disrupting our practice!"

"Did his strange behavior begin approximately twelve days ago?" Inui asked even though Sutefuani had just told him to go away.

"I'm not talking to you guys anymore!" said Sutefuani. "Get lost!"

"Yeah, get lost!" ordered the rest of the Regulars.

They all had to run away because their alternate Universe selves started chucking tennis balls at them.

"I don't know guys…" said Taka. "I know _I _would never do that, yet that version of myself was…"

"There are clearly some significant differences between this Universe and ours, I'll give you that." Inui said. "But one thing remains the same. We must find Ryoma."

"What? That didn't make sense." Said Shishido.

"Just be quiet and find Ryoma." Said Inui. "And if he recognizes us as not the people we saw at the tennis courts, then we know for sure he is the real Ryoma, and not an alternate Universe Ryoma."

"WE KNOW." Said everyone.

"Just making sure." Said Inui. "I can never tell with any of you."

"Should we split up?" Oshitari asked.

"Yes, that would be the best thing to do." Said Inui. "And we must meet back here within the hour whether you find Ryoma or not. That way we can regroup and report anything else out of the ordinary."

"Let's just split into six groups." Said Momo. "Two people in each group. Just whoever else was in your Universe with you to make it easiest."

"HELLO?" said Kirihara as he walked right up to Momo and slapped him. "I was in my Universe by myself! Stop forgetting that!"

"Don't slap me!" said Momo as he slapped him right back.

The two of them started a vicious slapping fight that only ended in tears.

"All right…are you two done?" Inui asked.

They both nodded solemnly while caressing their injured cheeks.

"We'll split up into five groups." Inui said. "Whoever you went to your Universe with. And Kirihara, you can join any group you wish."

"Why can't we find anyone else from Rikkai Dai?" Kirihara complained.

"Aw, but I want to be in a group with Oishi…" Eiji whined. "No offense to you or anything, Taka."

"None taken." Said Taka.

"Whatever." Said Inui. "Just make groups of two. Except for one group of three."

They were just about to start playing Musical Groups (a game that is very similar to musical chairs, except you pick group members instead of chairs) when they were interrupted by the sound of someone's throat being cleared.

So they stopped and turned around to see Ryoma standing right there. He was not wearing a Seigaku Regular jersey or jacket or pants or ANYTHING. Well no. I take that back. He was wearing SOMETHING. Just not the REGULAR stuff. He had on like… a white t-shirt. And some pants. And he also had his tennis bag.

"Hi." said everyone.

"Hi." He said.

There was a bit of a pause.

"So uh…is there any particular reason why you're dressed like that?" Ryoma inquired.

"Wait…so you recognize the fact that we're who we are?" Oishi asked.

"What?" said Ryoma, raising an eyebrow.

"Have you noticed anything weird about _anything_ for the past twelve days?" Inui tried more clearly.

"A few things." Ryoma said. "Tezuka's the captain of Hyoutei, there's a random girl the captain of our team…why, have you only JUST noticed?"

"So you're OUR Ryoma!" said Eiji as he hugged Ryoma.

Inui looked at his remote control to see that the number had changed to a '19'.

"I suppose I could have just looked at this." He concluded.

"What's going on here?" Ryoma said.

Everyone sat down and explained all the business to Ryoma, and he only sat and listened carefully.

When all was said and done, he stood up.

"That's a bummer." He said finally.

"So all we have to do is find Tezuka and we can—" started Oishi, but Ryoma shook his head.

"The Tezuka here is not the one from our Universe." Ryoma said. "I rode the bus to Hyoutei about a week ago to see if I could find some answers, but he was acting like he's been there all along. I honestly thought I was going nuts, especially since…"

He paused and looked like he was having trouble.

"Especially since…" he started for a second time, but once again looked as though he wasn't able to continue.

"Especially since what?" Oshitari led.

"I…am…bad at tennis…" Ryoma choked out.

Everyone gasped.

This really WAS a strange Universe!


	29. Defeat Atobe Sutefuani

Channel 29- Defeat Atobe Sutefuani

"Okay so it's not just tennis that I'm really bad at," Ryoma said as everyone hid behind a single tree and poked their heads out like a totem pole according to their height order. And yes, even the horses managed to hide behind that single tree as well.

The group all looked at the Fake Seigaku Regulars practice.

"What do you mean?" said Momo.

"I'm bad at EVERYTHING." Ryoma explained. "Even mundane things like walking or moving food from the plate to my mouth."

They all ducked back behind this magical tree of theirs and Ryoma then showed a few stains he had on his shirt.

"So what is this Universe?" said Kirihara.

"A Universe in which the position of captain of Seigaku had to be opened up for a random girl, so Tezuka was transported to Hyoutei, but then the problem arose that Atobe was already that captain so his person was abandoned and replaced with a female who is apparently quite superior at tennis." Inui answered.

"I hate this Universe." Atobe said.

"You've already voiced that opinion more than once, Atobe." Said Oshitari as if he was talking to a young child.

"I could care less about all that other stuff." Ryoma admitted. "But I just can't stand being bad at tennis."

"It's all right." Said Oishi. " Fuji and I are both really bad at tennis too!"

Ryoma stared at the two of them.

"Yeah, actually I've been meaning to talk to you guys about that." He said, adjusting his hat and looking down. "It really just makes me feel very uncomfortable that you're both wearing skirts."

"We're not doing this by choice!" they both yelled, hitting him over the head with their rackets.

"Have we received our mission yet, by any chance?" Taka asked Inui.

"I had completely forgotten about that." Said Inui, taking out the remote control.

"How did you forget?" said EVERYONE.

"Oh, we have received our mission." Inui nodded. "It says we must defeat Atobe Sutefuani."

"Defeat?" said Shishido. "You mean like in tennis?"

"I would assume." Inui replied.

"That's impossible." Ryoma said. "Sutefuani is the best there is at tennis. There's no one better. She has never EVER been beaten before, and she came over my house one time and she beat my dad without even taking her racket out of her bag."

Everyone waited for him to go on.

"And…" Ryoma said, kicking the dirt. "I'm sort of uncontrollably and madly in love with her…"

"SWEET MERCIFUL HEAVENS!" everyone threw their arms up in the air.

"I knew it!" said Momo. "It should have been completely obvious to us when we first met her! Her waist length silver hair and gold bandana should have been a dead giveaway!"

"It's true." Inui adjusted his glasses. "This confirms it. If Fuji and Oishi were in the Girl Universe and Kirihara was in Cowboy Universe, then Ryoma is surely in Mary-Sue Universe."

"All the pieces are coming together." Choutarou said.

"If that's the case, it will be impossible to defeat her!" said Eiji.

"We have to try." Said Inui. "And we need your help, Ryoma."

"With what?" Ryoma asked.

"You've been playing tennis with her for the past twelve days." Inui said. "What are her weak points? Style of play? Any information you have on her would help."

"She has no weak points." Ryoma said. "She adjusts her style of play according to the opponent she's playing. She's ambidextrous and her serve is over two hundred and fifty miles per hour."

"No way!" said Shishido. "That's faster than Choutarou's serve!"

Choutarou looked like he was going to faint, but Shishido steadied him.

"MILES per hour?" Inui confirmed.

"Yes." Said Ryoma. "MILES. And not only that, she can essentially do everyone's special moves."

"When you say everyone…" Taka started.

"Name something." Ryoma said.

"The Hadoukyuu." Taka tried.

"Yup." Ryoma said. "And Burning Mode too."

"The Triple Counters?" Fuji tried.

"She can do those too." Ryoma said.

"Acrobatic tennis?" Eiji said. "And the Kikumaru Beam? The Seal Step? The Kikumaru Bazooka?"

Eiji sounded more and more distressed as he named off all of his moves.

Ryoma nodded. "All of them." He said.

"Not any of MY moves of course." Said Oshitari.

"I can't think of what they are off the top of my head, but I'm willing to bet she can do them." Ryoma said.

At this point, most of the young men (and Oishi and Fuji) were in tears.

When they finally got over it, they resolved to do something about it.

"We have to defeat her in tennis to get out of this Universe." Said Inui. "And I'm sure a lot of you would want to show her up as well."

"I want to play her first." Said Shishido.

"Why?" said Kirihara. "It's not like she stole any of YOUR moves. Cause you don't have any moves."

"HEY!" said Shishido, grabbing Kirihara's collar.

"Actually, she did get Fake Inui to serve really intense serves at her for a little while, kind of like what you did." Ryoma commented.

"WHAT?" Shishido yelled, dropping Kirihara and grabbing Ryoma.

"Hey, I'm just the messenger." Ryoma reminded him.

Shishido let go of Ryoma and pounded his fist into his palm. "This definitely goes beyond just defeating her in order to jump Universes! I'll defeat her just to show her that she's… NOT all that!"

Shishido got frustrated with himself because he got too passionate and couldn't think of anything less lame to say.

About ten minutes later, Shishido was walking off the courts with his head hung low as Sutefuani pointed and laughed at him.

"It's all right, Shishido." Said Choutarou. "You tried your best!"

"I didn't touch the ball a single time!" Shishido whined.

"I told you guys." Ryoma said. "It's impossible to beat her in tennis. She's just too good! No, good is an understatement!"

"Which one of you boys is next?" Sutefuani called. "I should have known that the real reason you were hanging around the courts was because you wanted to challenge me!"

"Oishi, you and me should play doubles against her!" said Eiji.

"Would that be legal?" Oishi asked.

"SURE!" said Eiji.

"Even if you DID make the rules…" Oishi said. "Keep in mind that I am terrible at tennis right now."

"Oh yeah." Said Eiji. "Then I'll play her! And I'll beat her for YOUR sake, Oishi!"

"For my sake?" said Oishi.

"Yeah!" said Eiji. "You know, so we can get to the next Universe and eventually get back to our own and you can turn back into a guy."

"Oh right." Said Oishi. "Of course."

Eiji grabbed the racket and ran onto the court.

Three minutes later…

"I have NEVER seen a match go by that fast." Said Eiji as he trudged off the court and dropped the racket on the ground. "I mean seriously! I'm sorry, Oishi. I failed you!"

"It's okay, Eiji." Said Oishi. "We know you tried really hard."

"Geez!" said Kirihara. "Even I can't finish a match in less than ten minutes! I'll play her next."

He picked up the racket and went to the court.

After a couple of minutes, Kirihara was once again banished to the sidelines where everyone else was shaking their heads in disappointment. He, like Eiji and Shishido before him, never even touched the ball.

"Let me try." Said Choutarou, taking the racket from Kirihara. "I think my serves are the only ones that can match hers!"

"Remember also, Ootori," said Oshitari. "You are a super hero and you have super strength."

"Oh right!" said Choutarou. "I'll try to hold back!"

"Are you kidding?" said Oshitari. "Use your abilities to your advantage. Lodge every single ball in the court if you have to in order to get the points you need to beat her."

Choutarou blinked.

"Okay!" he said as he went to the court.

"I'm feeling generous…so you take the first serve!" said Sutefuani.

"Oh no, you can have it, really!" said Choutarou.

"Just serve it, and I can only hope that your ability to play tennis is better than your ability to pick out clothes in the morning." Said Sutefuani.

Choutarou looked down at his suit and tie that he was still wearing.

"You know something?" said Choutarou, his lip quivering slightly. "THAT… was unnecessary."

"Beat her, Choutarou!" cheered Shishido.

"I will!" said Choutarou. "I'll put my heart and soul into it, too!"

He threw the ball up into the air and served it with all his heart and soul. The ball once again ZINGED across the court with such great speed that no one even saw it move.

Except Sutefuani.

She ran up to the ball and returned it as if it was the easiest ball in the world to return. Choutarou dove to hit the ball back to her but the ball went clear through his racket and then got lodged in the court just behind him, but still in bounds.

"That's quite a good serve you have!" said Sutefuani as Choutarou sat up and looked at the big gaping hole in the racket he held. "But it's still too early for you to beat me."

"Hey." Said Fuji, twitching slightly.

"Logically, her racket's wires would not be strong enough to withstand Ootori's serve." Said Inui, shaking his head.

"Nothing's logical in this world." Ryoma sighed.

"I don't understand." Said Choutarou, still sitting in the same spot and staring at the hole, then behind him where the ball was still steaming from the hole it was stuck in. Then he looked up at everyone who was watching from behind the fence. "There really is no way to defeat her!"

"Don't say that!" Atobe commanded. "Someone give me a racket. I'll put this Atobe-wannabe in her place."

"Atobe, as your teammate in both tennis and detective work, I cannot allow you to do this." Oshitari said. "It will only end in heartache."

"Oshitari…" said Atobe threateningly.

"Besides," said Fuji, standing up. "I am going to play against her."

Everyone looked at Fuji and tried to convince him otherwise, but he seemed pretty adamant about making a fool of himself.

"She has disrespected my style of tennis and misused one of my favorite sinister things to say." Fuji said, picking up a racket. "And even if the odds are stacked against me, I have to at least attempt."

"Fuji, even though you will most certainly lose, I still admire your courage." Said Taka.

"Thank you Taka." Said Fuji. "I appreciate your support."

Fuji then went to the courts.

And his match didn't even clock to a minute before he was defeated, and retreated back to the sidelines.

"Well." He said. "That proved nothing."

He closed his eyes and gave a heavy sigh.

"Why didn't any of you at least even TRY to talk me out of that?" he demanded, but his tone was sort of just endearing.

"Um…" everyone backed away from him.

"Is there no one good enough here to even give me a challenge?" Sutefuani walked over in a very arrogant fashion with her racket on her shoulder. "I'm disappointed! I was expecting a little bit more from such a strange crew. But then again, I am the best. And when you're the best, there's no one better. That's how it works, isn't it?"

Sutefuani then turned her back to the group and strutted arrogantly away.

"Oh Sutefuani." Said Ryoma. "No matter how cruel and bitchy and mean she is… somehow…"

They all looked at Ryoma who looked like he was in some kind of dream world.

Momo hit him over the head.

"Ow…" Ryoma said, rubbing the spot where he had just been struck.

"Oh." Said Inui suddenly.

"What?" said everyone.

"Oh…" Inui said again.

"What?" everyone repeated.

Inui paused for a moment. "Well, I didn't see the rest of the mission." He said.

"The rest of the mission?" said everyone. Yes. All together like that.

"Well, there was a little bit of dust here." Inui said, brushing some dust of the remote control. "And I only just noticed the end half of the mission."

"It being…?" Oishi led.

"Defeat Atobe Sutefuani…" Inui read very slowly. "In a battle. To the death."

"You mean…we have to kill her?" Eiji swallowed hard.

"Yes." Said Inui. "Apparently."

There was silence among the group for a couple of seconds.

No one wanted to be the first one to speak.

No one really COULD speak.

Until, all at once, they were surged with the uncontrollable spirit and joy which just made them all shout quite enthusiastically, "YAY!"


	30. Bloodbath

Channel 30- Bloodbath

So they followed her.

"Even though I love her so much, I kind of want to see her dead…" Ryoma admitted. "Though it IS tearing me up inside."

"Sh!" said Momo throwing his hand over Ryoma's mouth as they dove into a bush.

She stopped, turned and looked behind her. Then she shrugged and continued walking.

"I'll just use the single shot in my gun." Said Inui, raising his gun.

"I won't have it." Atobe said. "I want to be the one to kill her. She has stolen my identity so I deserve to cause her death."

Before anyone could stop him, Atobe got to his feet and whipped out his gun.

"GIRL!" he yelled and she turned around. "There is only ONE Atobe child fit to be in any Universe!"

He took a shot as Kirihara jumped to his feet to stop him.

And, even though Kirihara had been BEHIND Atobe, somehow he received the shot and was knocked off his feet and into another bush.

"Oops." Said Atobe, looking back to see what he had done.

"Oh no!" gasped Choutarou as he jumped up. "Don't worry, everyone! I can heal him!"

"You can heal too?" Oshitari looked almost disgusted as Choutarou put his hands over the whining and groaning Kirihara and the two of them started glowing.

"It'll take a few minutes, though!" Shishido said, standing up.

"Were you trying to kill me just now?" Sutefuani shouted, advancing towards where Atobe and everyone else was.

"Frankly…yes…" Atobe answered.

"Stand back and let me take care of this." Inui said, pulling out his one-shot gun and aiming it directly at Sutefuani.

"NO!" Ryoma yelled as he dove out in front of the shot and received it in the chest instead of her.

"Ryoma!" said everyone, except they were mostly just like, "WTF!" as opposed to, "OMG NO!"

Momo was the first to go over to him.

"Why did you do it, Ryoma?" he demanded as Ryoma writhed around on the ground.

"Because…I love her…" Ryoma said haltingly.

"I'll be over in a second!" Choutarou called.

"You idiot!" said Momo. "We could have gotten out of here and now we have to think up a more convoluted way of killing her!"

"Why are you ALL trying to kill me?" said Sutefuani, looking shocked.

"Well, we could say it's because it's our mission, but it's mostly because you just bother us." Oshitari answered.

"Well, in that case I'll just have to fight back!" said Sutefuani as she dropped her racket and struck a fighter's stance. "I'll have you know that my father was a ninja and he taught me everything he knows! And my mother was a very powerful sorceress and she taught me everything SHE knows!"

Everyone else raised their eyebrows.

"What?" they said.

But Sutefuani immediately went on the offensive and attacked Momo since he was the closest. She gave him a roundhouse kick to the face that could shatter bones, because clearly her ninja father must have also been somehow related to Chuck Norris or someone equally badass.

Momo skidded across the ground and was immediately down for the count, just as Kirihara and Choutarou popped up.

"Don't you two ever take another shot!" Kirihara ordered as he looked at the bloody hole in his shirt, but thankfully his wound had been healed.

"Oh wow!" said Choutarou, looking back and forth between Momo and Ryoma. "Who's closer to death?"

"Help Momo first because Ryoma brought that injury on himself." Said Eiji, putting his hands on his hips.

"Got it!" said Choutarou as he ran to aid Momo.

"Oh no you don't!" said Sutefuani as she conjured up a ball of ultimate concentrated power and threw it at Choutarou.

"Look out Choutarou!" Shishido shouted.

Choutarou looked up just in time and shot a ball of ultimate concentrated power right back at her. The two balls of ultimate concentrated power collided in midair and combusted, causing a grand explosion that threw everyone back, except for Sutefuani and Choutarou, both of which remained standing.

"I think at this point, it's important that Ootori fights Sutefuani and we just wait until we get to the next Universe to worry about the others." Said Inui, sitting up.

"I won't have to deal with you for long." Said Sutefuani, pointing at Choutarou. "I'll have you know that your weakness was synthesized into that blast, and now it's in the air and you'll have no way to escape it once you've inhaled!"

"Oh no!" gasped Choutarou.

But he quickly realized she was not bluffing once he collapsed to the ground.

"Choutarou!" Shishido yelled, running over to Choutarou and trying to help him get up.

"It's the end for me, Shishido…" said Choutarou, looking weak as he had a hard time keeping his eyes open.

"Choutarou, don't say that!" said Shishido dramatically. "NO!"

Everyone else was still a little confused.

"Wait…how is it that SHE knows his weakness but we don't?" said Atobe.

"How is that she knows his weakness at all?" Oshitari added.

"You have crossed the line!" said Shishido as he got up and ripped off his suit and tie revealing that he was now SILVER BOY, and then took off his glasses. "First you beat both of us in tennis and now you've killed Choutarou!"

"I'm not dead yet, Shishido." Choutarou said.

"Okay, well, he's in critical condition anyway!" Shishido revised his statement as he reached for his utility belt and pulled out his famous laws of physics defying spear. "This is the end for you!"

"Come and get some." Said Sutefuani, striking a pose and making a tiny gesture with her hand.

Shishido charged at her with his spear and she just allowed him to approach her, but when he got close enough, instead of impaling her, he just grabbed her into a loving embrace and the two of them started passionately making out.

Everyone who was watching just continued to watch as the two of them made declarations of love to each other while getting all down and dirty.

"Hm…" said Inui, rubbing his chin slightly.

"All right, that's enough you two." Said Atobe. "Cut it out. Seriously."

Finally, Sutefuani pulled away from Shishido.

"I'm sorry…my love." She said as she stabbed him in the chest with his own spear.

"If I were to die…I'm glad it was by your hands…" Shishido said as he fell to the ground in slow motion.

"Great!" said Eiji. "She just killed two of the most likely people who would be able to kill her!"

"You know…if those two weren't going to come back to life in the next Universe, I would be VERY angry." Said Atobe.

"Well, at the rate we're going at, we might not even get to the next Universe." Inui said. "If we all die, then this whole escapade is over, and everyone else who is trapped in other Universes will be there forever. And we'll be dead forever."

"In that case," said Taka, pulling himself up on his horse. "Even though I'm not normally the killing type, I guess there's no other choice."

"Not a step closer!" said Sutefuani as she shot a fire ball of doom at the group, and everyone dove out of the way just in time, except for Taka and his horse who were incinerated on the spot. Just like that.

Fuji sat up and gasped ever so dramatically when he saw the crater where Taka once stood. "That right there is unacceptable!" he declared.

"That was kind of upsetting…" Oishi agreed.

"Just try and stop me!" said Sutefuani.

"Kirihara." Said Inui. "You and I have to kill ourselves."

"What?" demanded Kirihara. "WHY?"

"Because." Inui said. "If we are dead then Atobe or Oshitari would be able to shoot Sutefuani and kill her."

"But…" Kirihara stuttered.

"That's so brave!" said Oishi. "And even though I'm not quite sure how that will work, I'm willing to bet you know more about this business than I do!"

"Here, take this." Inui said, handing Oishi the remote control. "After they shoot Sutefuani and there is a white light, press the button that changes the channel."

"Got it." Said Oishi with a nod.

"I'm not sure I want to do this." Kirihara admitted.

"We're running out of time." Said Inui. Then he looked at Oshitari and Atobe. "Do it."

"Wait—" Kirihara started.

"Okay." Atobe and Oshitari said with shrugs as if it was nothing and then shot both of them DEAD.

Eiji let out a blood curling scream. "WILL IT NEVER END?" he yelled, dropping to his knees and shaking his fists at the heavens.

"There is so much unnecessary bloodshed!" said Oishi, looking very depressed. He looked over at Fuji who was only smiling pleasantly. Once Fuji realized that Oishi was staring at him, he quickly changed his expression to that of concern as he nodded his head.

"Let's hope this works." Said Atobe as he took a shot at Sutefuani.

The shot went directly towards her, but she raised her tennis racket, which she had been holding the entire time, and deflected the shot.

"YOU CAN'T DO THAT." Said Atobe after he processed what had just happened.

"I just did!" said Sutefuani as she threw two HOMING balls of concentrated power at Atobe and Oshitari and killed them as well. And they WERE killed because it was dramatic enough.

At this point, the only ones that remained were Eiji, Oishi and Fuji.

They looked at each other.

"This is unsettling." Said Fuji.

"We have to fight back!" said Eiji as he grabbed Inui's sword and held it up, but as he turned to face Sutefuani, he discovered that she was STANDING RIGHT THERE.

"Only three more to go!" she said dramatically as she started forming a ball of energy while cackling maniacally

"OH DEAR GOD!" Eiji yelled, cowering and covering his face as if that would protect him at all.

But then he heard a loud SNAP and noticed that Sutefuani's cackling had ceased.

He slowly opened his eyes and found Fuji now standing over him with his hands extended, and Sufefuani at his feet with a broken neck.

"There." Fuji said, clapping his hands together.

"Wow…" said Eiji. "Broke her neck?"

"Yup." Said Fuji. "Twisting the neck about three quarters around is enough to kill someone."

"I am really creeped out that you are savvy to that." Eiji said truthfully.

"I couldn't have her getting away with using my phrase and my Triple Counters." Fuji said. Then he paused. "And killing everyone." Then he took a moment to look around. "Well, well. This is certainly a mess."

"Yes it is." Oishi agreed, walking over. "And when do you suppose we'll be engulfed by that white light?"

"Hm…probably pretty soon…" Eiji answered.

The three of them stood there for a few minutes and started to get a little worried, especially with the presence of so many corpses around them, when suddenly the white light started engulfing them.

"Oh there we go." Said Oishi, looking relieved.

"Just press that button there." Eiji said, leaning over and pointing.

Oishi pressed the button to change the channel, and they were immediately transported to a large empty soccer field.

After standing around in silence for a few seconds, Inui sat up and plucked the remote from Oishi.

"Thank you." He said.

One by one, everyone else came around as well.

"Well that was wild!" said Momo. "How did it go? I'm assuming we beat her. Who killed her?"

"Fuji." Eiji and Oishi answered, pointing at Fuji.

"I WISH that surprised me." Said Momo with a sigh.

"Shishido, what was with you making passionate love to Sutefuani right before she killed you?" Oshitari said, tapping his foot.

"What?" said Shishido. "I don't know…something just came over me."

"It was QUITE the spectacle." Said Atobe. "And I would by lying if I told you I wasn't turned on by it."

"Well—" Shishido started, but then he stopped. "Wait WHAT?"

"Never mind." Said Atobe, walking away.

"Where are we now?" Taka asked Inui.

"I'll start working it out after I do one thing." Said Inui as he walked right up to Ryoma and hit him upside the head.

"What was that for?" Ryoma demanded.

"If you hadn't jumped in front of my shot then we could have avoided almost everyone dying." Said Inui. "Well, actually. Everyone dying. It's your fault."

"It doesn't matter, does it?" said Ryoma. "We all came back to life, didn't we?"

"I suppose." Said Inui. "And you are lucky for that."

"Whatever…" said Ryoma.

"All right, now let's try to figure out where we are." Kirihara suggested.

Everyone looked around.

"…Soccer field." They established.


	31. Spending Money

Channel 31- Spending Money

"Well, we're not in any place familiar, that's for sure." Said Inui. "So we know at least there will be no more Mary-Sues."

"Oh good." Said Oshitari. "Do you all know that that is the second time I've died?"

"I've been shot three times." Said Kirihara. "But it's good to know that you have the power to heal, Ootori."

"Are there any powers you DON'T have, by any chance?" Eiji asked.

"Of course!" said Choutarou but he refused to go into the details.

"And I think we have a right to know what your weakness is too." Said Atobe. "Just because everyone else seems to know."

"And how do you think people get to know it?" said Choutarou, putting his hands on his hips. "When other people tell them!"

"We're not telling anyone." Said Shishido.

"But seriously." Said Oshitari. "Twice. I've been killed twice so far."

"We heard you the first time." Fuji said, looking annoyed.

"You know something, Inui?" said Taka. "Remember when we were back in the Cowboy Universe and you said something about it taking progressively longer for us to find people in each Universe?"

"I recall saying something to that effect." Inui said. "I'm not sure whether or not it was in Cowboy Universe or not, though."

"Well, disregarding where we were when you said it…" Taka said. "I noticed that we just completed that Universe's mission in only a couple of hours!"

"Yes, well, if you'd also notice," Inui said. "It took us three days to complete the mission in the Girls Universe."

"Yeah…" Taka admitted.

"Are we still finding people at the same rate than when we asked last time?" Momo asked hopefully.

"Let's see…" Inui said, adjusting his glasses. "Ten people in twelve days. We have picked up our pace a bit."

"All right, that being said…" Shishido said. "How much longer is this going to take?"

"With nineteen people remaining…" Inui pondered a moment, and then confidently said, "About twenty-three more days."

"TWENTY THREE MORE DAYS?" everyone said helplessly.

"But just think about it!" said Eiji. "We are getting faster, aren't we? That means we'll just keep getting faster and faster and faster until we start hopping to three different Universes in a single day. Right Inui?"

"No." said Inui. "That is highly improbable."

"Aww…" said everyone.

"And, with the time growing late…" Inui observed. "We are once again without a place to stay for the night."

"Are we going to have to sleep on the ground again?" Atobe said with a face that suggested it was everyone ELSE'S fault.

"Unless you have a place we can stay in this Universe." Inui said.

"Why not stay at a hotel?" Atobe suggested.

"And I take it you have money stashed away somewhere, then?" Inui inferred.

"Well, no." said Atobe. "But Ootori could break into any bank and steal us enough money."

"What?" said Choutarou with this face that was just: "!"

"Do you have the power that allows you to go through walls?" Atobe asked.

"Well…yes…" said Choutarou.

"And invisibility?" Atobe said.

"Um…yes…" Choutarou answered quietly.

"There." Said Atobe. "No one will know the difference. I'm willing to bet they won't even know it's gone for days. And by then, we'll have left this Universe for good."

"That'll work." Said Fuji. "I don't want to sleep outside."

"I don't know guys." Said Choutarou. "That goes against all my morals."

"That'll work." Fuji repeated, taking only a half step towards Choutarou, but not changing his tone at all. "I don't want to sleep outside."

Choutarou took TWO steps away. "I guess if it's best for everyone…" he said nervously.

"I'm glad." Fuji said.

They combed the area for the closest bank and then waited outside like loiterers.

"Wish me luck, Shishido!" said Choutarou as he changed into SMASHBANG BOOOOOM! SILVER MAN! "I am SO nervous…"

"Don't be nervous, Choutarou." Said Shishido. "Even if you get caught, no one will know who you are and you can just keep your secret identity on."

"But the thing is…" Choutarou said. "Silver Man is a hero. He's supposed to protect the people and stop crime. Not lower himself to the level of a common thief!"

"Now he's talking in third person…" Momo frowned.

"Hurry up now, I'm tired." Atobe ordered.

Choutarou nodded solemnly, and within another second, he was invisible and gone.

"Guys, I think I sort of disapprove of this as well." Shishido said. "Not because it's against the law, but just because we're making Choutarou do something he doesn't want to do!"

"Please," said Fuji, putting his hand on Shishido's shoulder. "Don't speak again. It frustrates me."

Shishido looked like he was about to voice his opinion on Fuji's rude comment, but thankfully a few people decided that Shishido's life had some value so they grabbed him and covered his mouth.

A few minutes later, Choutarou suddenly appeared. He dove behind the building and changed out of his super hero costume and then returned.

"I didn't know how much we needed so I just grabbed six thousand dollars in small bills." Choutarou said as he pulled a large wad of money out of his pocket and presented it to the group. "Will that be enough?"

"Yes, I think that will be plenty." Atobe said, swiping it from him and putting it in his secret pocket. "I will hold onto this money."

"Why you?" said Kirihara.

"Because, of everyone here, I hold the most authority since I am the captain of a team." Atobe answered.

"Well, I am the co-captain of Seigaku, and most of the people here are on Seigaku!" Oishi pointed out.

"Don't remind me." Atobe rolled his eyes.

"Why don't we just split the money up evenly among all the twelve of us?" suggested Taka. "We could each take five hundred dollars. I did that math right, right?"

"Yes." Said Inui. "I think that is the best idea."

He held out his hand for Atobe to give him the money.

Atobe looked reluctant, but he handed it over anyway.

Inui then counted out five hundred dollars for each person, and kept five hundred for himself. Of course, everyone double checked to make sure they weren't getting the shaft.

"Don't spend it all in one place!" chuckled Eiji, putting his in his pocket.

"I don't think I've ever held this much money at one time before." Ryoma said.

"Maybe I should hold onto it for you, then." Said Momo, holding out his hand for Ryoma to give him the money.

"Yeah right." Said Ryoma with a disappointed glare at Momo.

"It was JUST a suggestion." Said Momo innocently.

"Let's find a hotel with some empty rooms." Said Inui. "Well, those who wish to spend their money on a hotel, though I don't know why you wouldn't want to." Then he paused. "Then again, I'm going to require that we all go to the hotel so we can stay together, especially since we haven't found the people in this Universe yet."

"We were all going to go to the hotel ANYWAY." Said Oshitari. "You don't have to act like you're the boss."

"Because you're not." Atobe made sure to add.

"Whatever." Said Inui.

"We should also make a mental note of where those soccer fields are." Oishi added as the group started to go to find a hotel.

"Yeah, if the remote made us appear there then that's probably where the people in this Universe will eventually show up." Kirihara agreed.

"That's been the pattern so far, anyway." Taka agreed.

"Has it?" Choutarou inquired.

"Yes, so far." Said Inui. "First, we appeared in the court yard right near the place where Taka and Eiji resided in Knight Universe."

"Then we appeared on a street right near where Atobe and Oshitari were doing an investigation in Detective Universe!" Eiji went on.

"And then in that town that Kirihara was supposed to be terrorizing in Cowboy Universe." Oshitari continued.

"And then near the place where Shishido and Ootori worked in the Superhero Universe." Kirihara said.

"And at those tennis courts where Fuji and Oishi attempted to play tennis in the Girls Universe." Shishido said.

"Then, just at the tennis courts again where Sutefuani commanded her team in the Mary-Sue Universe." Oishi said.

"And…um…" said Ryoma. "I don't know. It's my turn to say something but I can't really go any further with it."

"Just make a comment about how we made it to the hotel while we were walking and conversing about things that were quite obvious before we started talking about them." Inui said.

"Oh." Said Ryoma as he looked up and saw said hotel. "Well here we are. We're at the hotel."

"Good thing we talked to pass the time!" said Fuji.

The young man behind the counter informed them that it was fifty dollars a room for one night, but they only had six vacancies. So everyone threw down twenty-five dollars and received six room keys.

"All right, who's sleeping where?" said Inui as he held up the six keys.

"I want to share a room with Oishi!" said Eiji.

"Well, I guess Eiji and I will take the first room." Said Oishi, taking one of the keys.

"And Choutarou and I will take the second." Shishido mumbled.

Everyone stared at him.

"WHAT?" Shishido yelled because he could FEEL them staring at him and finally had to unleash his anger. "WE'RE JUST FRIENDS!"

"It's okay, Shishido…" said Choutarou, trying to calm him down and taking the key to the second room.

"Ryoma?" Momo said. "What do you say?"

"Whatever." Ryoma shrugged, taking one of the keys.

"Since I don't care enough to spend time with any of the rest of you, Oshitari and I will take the fourth room." Atobe announced.

"I can't help but agree." Oshitari shrugged.

"Fuji?" said Taka.

"All right, Taka." Said Fuji, taking the key and then glaring at Kirihara. "It's certainly much better than the potential alternative."

"I feel so unpopular." Said Kirihara.

"Think how it feels to be me." Said Inui. "I'm here with a bunch of people on my team and I was picked last so I have to share a room with you."

"Way to make me feel even MORE unpopular." Kirihara pouted. "I want more people from Rikkai Dai to be here. Or people from NOT Hyoutei or Seigaku."

"Let's shoot for eight o'clock tomorrow morning." Inui said, apparently getting over his sadness of being picked last in Musical Groups. "We'll start our search for the people or person in this Universe early. And if I've been paying good enough attention, I believe tomorrow is a Monday."

They waited for him to say something having to do with tomorrow being a Monday.

"And…so?" said Shishido.

"So what?" said Inui.

"Why did you tell us that tomorrow was a Monday?" said Shishido.

"I don't know." Said Inui. "Just in case anyone wanted to know. I've been keeping track and I wanted to share my information with you all. Back off."

"Whoa, calm down." Said Shishido. And, if you get a "Whoa, calm down." from Shishido, you KNOW you need to calm down.

"I'll see you all in the morning." Said Inui. "Don't be late."

"GOTCHA!" they all gave him thumbs up and retired to their rooms.


	32. Omake

Channel 32- OMAKE

That night wasn't too different than any other night. Though it was different for YOU, because tonight you get to see everyone's dreams after their various horribly traumatizing experiences that have brought them to where they are at this point.

In Room 6, Kirihara was dreaming…

_Kirihara suddenly found himself in the middle of a desert._

"_Wait a second…" he said. "This is familiar."_

_He looked around and saw that accursed campsite off in the distance._

"_I'm back in that Universe!" he said, running towards the campsite. "This is impossible! I thought we left that place for good…"_

"_That's what you THOUGHT, Kirihara."_

_Kirihara whirled around to see Inui, Momo, Eiji and Taka standing there._

"_You four!" said Kirihara. "What's going on? Why are we back here?"_

"_We've decided that we don't like you." Said Inui. "So we brought you back to this Universe and we're going forth without you."_

"_You can't do that!" Kirihara yelled. "The counter won't ever go to zero and you'll be stuck in whatever Universe you're in last! You NEED me!"_

"_Actually, we don't need you." Said Eiji._

"_We're taking your horse instead, and the counter doesn't seem to mind." Momo said, pointing at the remote._

"_WHAT?" Kirihara said angrily but, sure enough, Momo was holding the reins on Forehand._

"_Oh and by the way." Said Taka. "I sanction the love of our two horses and now your horse is pregnant."_

"_I TOLD YOU NOT TO LET THAT HAPPEN!" Kirihara yelled angrily._

"_Bye now, Kirihara." Said Inui. _

"_I'm sure you'll get used to your new life." Said Eiji._

"_Don't forget to terrorize the village every Tuesday at noon." Momo added._

"_And we'll take good care of your horse." Taka finished._

"_NOOOOOOOO!"_ _Kirihara ran towards them, but Inui pressed the button and they all disappeared._

At that exact moment, Kirihara yelled out in his sleep and sat up in bed, breathing heavily and sweating profusely.

"That was…too much…" Kirihara panted as he quietly lied back down, trying to go back to sleep.

In that very same room, Inui was also sleeping. But Inui doesn't dream like the rest of the human population. Oh no. He THINKS in his sleep. Take a look…

_The only visual was a giant melting clock in a totally nondescript Universe._

_Nineteen people remain. Only nineteen. So far, twelve of us have been located and retrieved, and hopefully the nineteen can be retrieved as well._

_Things are getting dangerous. Nearly everyone died in the previous Universe. Surely, I wonder what would happen were we all to die in a Universe and not complete the mission. I would like to know the answer to such a question, but do not dare ever conduct such an experiment._

_Nineteen, nineteen._ _Nineteen more people remain. Twelve days have passed, and we are almost on the thirteenth day. By now, I would imagine that those nineteen have fallen into their new worlds and become quite accustomed to it. Surely they must have figured out what happened._

_No, no. Not everyone is as smart as me. No, no._

_Besides, it is likely they all just assume they are in a prolonged dream sequence._

_Prolonged dream sequence?_

_Am I dreaming?_

_Oh damn it…_

Inui opened his eyes and cursed himself.

"Curse me." Said Inui.

Everyone knows that once you realize you're in a dream, you suddenly wake up. Alas for Inui.

All he could do now was roll over and try to go back to sleep.

Meanwhile, in Room 5, Fuji was also having an interesting dream…

_Fuji_ _was in the middle of a field of colorful flowers with the sun shining brightly. After a few moments of standing alone, he could hear the sound of footsteps coming up over the hill._

_He turned and saw a happy clown running towards him with his arms outstretched. The flowers around him suddenly turned into butterflies and flew away, and big pink hearts formed from the dust he kicked up._

_Fuji ran towards the clown with his arms outstretched as well, and the two of them met in the middle. The clown picked Fuji up and spun him around in slow motion while Fuji chuckled ever so warmly at this gesture. Finally, they lied down on the ground as the flowers that had turned into butterflies landed around them._

_In the background, a train conductor and a blonde young lady in a pink dress danced in circles as the butterflies flew around them._

_The clown pulled out a bubble pipe and started blowing into it, causing more and more big pink hearts to float about. Fuji laughed as he reached out and popped one, and when he did, it exploded with streamers and glitter._

_The train conductor and young lady came over to Fuji and the clown and pulled them to their feet, encouraging them to join in their dance. The four of them spun in circles as the hearts popped around them, showering them with glitter and love and the like, while the butterflies continued to circle them as well._

_A large sunflower bloomed in the middle of their circle of happiness and exploded with sunshine and joy. The four continued to dance around in circles ever so joyfully._

_Fuji_ _just continued to giggle contently._

Fuji just continued to giggle contently.

Taka stood over him looking concerned.

"Um…Fuji?" Taka whispered, even though it was silly for him to whisper since his goal was to wake him up.

Hesitantly, Taka reached over and started to shake Fuji slightly.

Fuji's eyes immediately sprung open. He saw Taka standing over him, then grabbed the blankets and pulled them up to his chin.

"May I help you?" Fuji asked suspiciously.

"Um…" Taka said slowly. "You were kind of… well, I don't think it was a nightmare… but uh… it was sort of freaking me out."

Fuji eyed Taka.

"Good night, Taka." He said, rolling over.

Taka quickly returned to his bed.

There was probably not going to be any Taka dreams tonight.

In Room 4, however, there were some dreams. First, let's visit Atobe…

"_DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE!"_

_Atobe as continuously shooting Sutefuani's limp body before him._

Let's leave that dream. It's almost as disturbing as Fuji's.

Oshitari was having a much different dream.

But we can't show you what it is.

We'll just tell you one thing: Gakuto was in it. Interoperate that however you like.

MOVING ON.

In Room 3, there were some more dreams.

_Ryoma was sitting at home with his cat, Karupin._

_He was playing with his cat, Karupin._

_When he should have been out making friends and getting fresh air, he was playing with his cat, Karupin._

"_Karupin, you're more fun than having REAL friends." Said Ryoma. "You're more fun than playing on the swings as too, and you know how much I love playing on the swings."_

_Ryoma then started laughing like a big huge dork._

This caused the real Ryoma to sit up in bed.

He slapped himself across the face.

"NO." he said. "NONE OF THAT."

He shook it off and then lied back down, trying to force himself to dream about something else. ANYTHING ELSE.

Momo was, meanwhile, having a less stupid dream.

"_OH BOY OH BOY!" cheered Momo as he ran into his favorite restaurant and discovered that it was a free all you can eat buffet._

_He started shoving things in his mouth left and right._

_He only paused a moment when he realized he had accidentally swallowed a fork._

_So he paused, and burped the fork back up._

"_How embarrassing."_ _He said, putting the fork aside._

_He kept eating and eating until he suddenly became very fat._

"_Oh no!"_ _Momo yelled, looking down at himself to see that he had, in fact, become absurdly fat. "What have I done to myself? This is a disaster! I'll never be able to go out into public again!"_

_Momo then ran away crying but he wasn't able to get very far because he got a cramp._

Momo's eyes opened very slowly and he looked around uneasily.

We said it was LESS STUPID than Ryoma's, but that doesn't mean it's NOT STUPID.

Momo looked under the covers to see that he was still his normal size.

"Okaaayy…" Momo said quietly.

In Room 2, with the Silver Pair, they were also dreaming. And yes, they were sleeping in separate beds.

_Shishido was running. Running as fast as he could. He was running away from a giant crab wearing loafers and shooting laser beams out of its eyes that was clawing and snipping at him._

_There was nowhere to run. The crab just kept on gaining on him and gaining on him and gaining on him._

Suddenly, and thankfully, before the crab caught him, Shishido woke up.

He looked around hesitantly and then woke up Choutarou.

"Choutarou, Choutarou!" he said.

"What is it Shishido?" Choutarou said, rolling over.

"I had that dream again." Shishido said, sitting down.

Choutarou sat up. "The one about the crab shooting laser beams out of its eyes and wearing loafers?" Choutarou said, folding his hands patiently.

"Yeah, that's the one." Shishido nodded. "What does it mean? I wish I knew!"

"I wish I knew too, so I could help you with this recurring dream." Choutarou said with a sigh.

"Well, I guess there's nothing we can do about it right now." Said Shishido. "I just hope I'm not crazy or anything."

"You're not crazy, Shishido!" said Choutarou. "I'm sure there're tons of people who have weird recurring dreams like you!"

"Really?" said Shishido.

"Yes!" said Choutarou. "One time I had this dream where everyone forgot my birthday at school because everyone was handing out Valentine's Day cards and no one gave me a birthday card…and then I had the very same dream the year after that on the very same day, except exactly a year later!"

Choutarou looked sad.

"I'm sorry Choutarou." Said Shishido.

"But…" Choutarou went on. "Then I realized that I wasn't dreaming after all, and it was just actually happening in real life."

Shishido and Choutarou paused.

"So…I guess that wasn't really a good example to use." Choutarou admitted.

"No…not really." Shishido said. "But thanks anyway."

"Okay, well…good night Shishido!" said Choutarou.

"Good night, Choutarou." Said Shishido as he went back to his own bed.

Finally, in Room 1, there was only one dream taking place. It wasn't that only one of them was sleeping, mind you. They were both sleeping. But they were having the same dream. AT THE SAME TIME. WHAT THE HELL.

"_We've returned home, Oishi!"_

"_Wow! After so long jumping around to different Universes, we're finally back in our own."_

"_And what a relief!_ _You're a boy again!"_

"_I have to admit that I was a little worried that I wasn't going to change back at first."_

"_Yeah!_ _Me too! Wouldn't that have been awful?"_

"_More than awful!_ _I would hate being a girl!"_

"_I would hate you being a girl too!"_

"_Yeah!"_

"_Yeah!"_

At the same time, Oishi and Eiji woke up. They were in separate beds but facing each other.

"No, I'm still a girl." Oishi answered.

"Aw man." Said Eiji. "I thought it was real for a second."

"No." said Oishi with a sigh. "Well, good night."

"Good night." Said Eiji.

And they both went back to sleep at the same time.

So there you go. That's what mostly everyone dreams about. I guess you didn't see a few people dreaming, but you'll survive, trust me.

Isn't it strange how none of them dreamed about tennis? Yes, very strange.


	33. Set Up

Channel 33- Set Up

"Did everyone sleep well?" Choutarou said as he and Shishido joined the rest of the crew in the lobby area at precisely eight o'clock. They were all eating HOTEL BREAKFAST.

The general answer was no, except for a few people who slept through the night like babies. Which is pretty much just Oshitari. He must have been having a REALLY good dream.

"So we don't really have any clue as to where we're going to find these people except for the fact that we appeared at a soccer field." Eiji established.

"Essentially." Inui said. "As of right now, it's been nearly two weeks since we've been scattered, and in such a normal-ish type Universe as this one, it's harder to find the person who sticks out."

"Aw man—" Ryoma said lamely as he failed at putting his English muffin in his mouth and it ended up in his lap.

Everyone laughed at him, and then cleared their throats awkwardly when they realized that pretty much everyone who existed in that Universe was staring at them.

"They're staring at you guys." Said Oishi.

"Which guys?" everyone said.

"I don't know." Said Oishi. "Pretty much all of you. You all look really weird and are in really flamboyant outfits."

"Yes…" said Inui, taking notice of that fact. "I think at this point we should perhaps find some clothes that will look more normal, especially if we spend more time in this Universe."

"But I don't want to waste all the money we got!" said Momo.

"Keep in mind that all the money will disappear when we go to the next Universe so we might as well spend it anyway." Shishido pointed out.

"Oh right…" said Momo sadly.

"I would want to go out and buy some pants anyway." Said Fuji, and Oishi quickly agreed.

They were all feeling dirty anyway since they had slept in their clothing. At least everyone had gotten the opportunity to take a shower, which is more than I can say about some of the OTHER Universes they've been in.

"I just hope they don't follow us." Said Kirihara with a sigh as he and Taka watched their horses frolic off.

"I kind of miss them already." Taka admitted.

"Yeah…but we can't have them following us around in this Universe." Kirihara said. "It's better that they're running free and if anyone encounters them, they'll have no way of connecting them back to us."

"And we'll get them back in the next Universe anyway." Taka shrugged. "And I hope it's a Universe where they stick out less."

"Yeah and—" Kirihara stopped and looked up to see the horses strolling next to each other very closely. "HEY!" he spun around and pointed at Taka.

"What?" said Taka. "You heard what Ootori said!"

"No, I DIDN'T hear what Ootori said." Said Kirihara, crossing his arms.

"He said that your horse was coming onto mine!" Taka reminded him.

"Don't talk to me!" said Kirihara as he stomped away.

Taka looked sad as he and Kirihara rejoined everyone else at the front of the hotel.

It just so happened there was a mall right nearby the hotel so they all strolled inside and stood at the entrance.

"So we all have four hundred and seventy-five dollars." Said Inui. "How long will it take to pick out a new outfit?"

Most of them replied, "Fifteen minutes," but Atobe said, "Couldn't say."

"Atobe, just be back here in fifteen minutes."

The person who said that wished not to be specified because they feared Atobe's wrath.

So everyone split up to find a store that would have proper garments for them. They all returned within fifteen minutes in street clothes that were appropriate to their personalities.

Then they left the mall.

Then they went back to the mall.

Then they had to wait about forty-five more minutes for Atobe to return.

THEN they left the mall for real.

When they reached the soccer field again, it was about nine o'clock. Still, the field was empty.

"What's that building over there?" wondered Choutarou as he pointed at the building that was just yonder on the other side of the soccer field.

"It appears to be a school." Inui noted.

"Lemme check!" said Momo as he once again took advantage of his telescope and then pocketed it again. "Yup. Definitely a school."

"I thought I told you to abandon all of your pirate articles with the rest of our stuff." Inui said, looking cross.

"What?" said Momo. "This is my telescope you're talking about. You kept your gun, didn't you?"

"That's beside the point." Inui said defensively.

"No, that IS the point." Momo said.

"It's come in handy." Inui argued.

"We kept our guns too." Said Oshitari, pointing to himself and Atobe.

"I have to admit, I kept my utility belt." Said Shishido.

"Well, I kept my whole costume." Choutarou said.

"That's a given, though." Shishido said.

"I kept my butter knife, even though I never use it." Said Eiji. "But who knows if I'll have to butter something!"

"I didn't even have to change my clothes." Ryoma said. "So I guess I kept everything."

"I thought it was pretty obvious that we still had our tennis rackets…" Oishi said, caressing his racket.

"It was just too hard to let them go." Fuji agreed.

"That's not fair!" said Kirihara. "I got rid of all MY stuff!"

"I did too." Said Taka. "I thought it would be kind of suspicious if I was walking around with a massive sword."

Inui stared at everyone.

"You know," he said. "You DID all get by in life when you didn't have those things that you felt so necessary to bring along."

"Inui, you're a hypocrite." Said Momo. "You still have your gun!"

"Stop." Said Inui. "Leave me alone and don't talk to me."

Everyone stood in silence and wandered around foolishly with nothing to do.

"So…do you suppose that maybe whoever we're looking for is in school right now?" Oshitari suggested.

"Hm…" everyone else pondered as they looked at the school.

"That is a possibility." Said Inui. "After all, it is a Monday."

Inui looked satisfied with the fact that his useless piece of information that he brought up yesterday suddenly was not quite so useless.

"Are there any volunteers to go inside and take a look around?" Inui asked.

"ME!" said Eiji. "Doing something would be much less boring than doing nothing."

Even Inui looked a little confused by that statement.

"Uh…okay…but you need some supervision." Said Inui even though he actually said that in his mind and said this out loud: "Does anyone else want to go?"

"Oishi!" cheered Eiji. "I just volunteered you, Oishi."

"I noticed." Oishi commented.

"Very well." Said Inui. "The two of you can go."

"Yay!" cheered Eiji.

The two of them went towards the school while everyone else waited around on the soccer field.

They walked up to the front desk where the secretary lady was sitting looking engrossed in her work.

"Excuse me," said Oishi.

"Yes, young lady?" said the secretary.

Oishi cringed, but got over it as soon as he could. "We're looking for some certain students who go to this school."

The secretary continued to wait. "Which students?" she asked finally.

"That's the thing." Said Eiji. "We're not exactly sure."

"What are you talking about?" said the secretary, getting overly frustrated too quickly.

"Well, we think that there might be one or more students here but we're not sure who they are and we're not even really sure if they are here or not." Eiji admitted.

The secretary gave a long sigh.

"Listen," she said. "I'm very busy. I don't have time for pranks."

"It's not a prank." Oishi said, and then a light bulb appeared above his head. "Do you have a list of names of the kids on the boy's tennis team?"

"So these potential students you don't know who also may or may not go to this school might be on the tennis team?" the secretary said, looking through a file cabinet.

"Uh…in so many words…" Oishi said slowly.

"Here you are." Said the secretary, handing them the list. "But I need that back when you're done."

Eiji looked over Oishi's shoulder and the two of them scanned the list once and twice and three times.

"Well, there's a kid whose first name is Takeshi, but that's of no consequence because we already found Momo, and he has a different last name AND this kid's a third year." Said Eiji.

Oishi raised his eyebrow at Eiji. "Thank you for that, Eiji." He said.

"No problem!" Eiji exclaimed.

Oishi handed the list back to the secretary. "Thank you." He said.

The secretary put the list away, and the two of them stood there looking dejected.

"I guess all we can do is go back to the soccer fields now." Said Eiji with a shrug.

He started walking away but Oishi grabbed his arm to stop him. "Wait," he said. "We're being pretty dumb right now."

"Are we?" said Eiji, looking concerned.

"This is an alternate Universe and we appeared at the soccer field so THAT MEANS…" Oishi led.

"We…should…go back…to the soccer fields?" Eiji tried.

"No!" said Oishi. "We need a list of the kids on the boy's soccer team!"

"Oh right!" Eiji said excitedly. Then paused. "But maybe we should get a list of the people on the girl's soccer team too. You know."

"Eiji, I told you not to bring that up anymore…" Oishi muttered.

Then they turned around and looked at the secretary who had moved her seat further away from where they were standing.

"I'm really not interested in your pranks." She said.

"Oh wow…yeah…we're practicing for a play… that's all…" Oishi said. "Do you have the soccer team lists?"

"Only because I'm curious about where this is going." The secretary pulled out the boy's and girl's soccer team lists.

"Hey, hey, look!" Eiji exclaimed, pointing at one of the names on the list. "Kamio Akira!"

"And Kaidou Kaoru!" Oishi pointed as well.

"Anyone else?" Eiji asked.

"No…that's it." Oishi replied.

"We rock!" said Eiji and Oishi at the same time as they jumped up and did a high five for an extended amount of time.

After they finished, they looked at the list again.

"Well, Kaidou makes sense." Said Oishi. "But why is Kamio here too? There's no one else from Fudomine."

"I don't know." Said Eiji. "Probably the same reason why Kirihara's here."

"Oh right." Said Oishi with a nod.

He turned back to the secretary and put the lists on the counter.

"Is there anyway we could get in touch with Kaidou Kaoru and Kamio Akira?" Oishi asked pleasantly.

"I'm going to have to say no on that one." Said the secretary.

"What?" whined Eiji. "Why not?"

"Frankly, you two freak me out." The secretary answered truthfully. "And I'm afraid of the consequences for the poor boys."

"But…we just want to talk to them for a second!" Eiji said as if that made any difference.

"You'll just have to wait until after school like everyone else." Said the secretary.

"We don't want to wait that long…" Eiji complained.

"It's all right." Said Oishi, leading Eiji away. "We'll come back when school's over."

Oishi guided Eiji outside.

"Oishi!" Eiji said, wrenching himself away. "Why'd you give up so fast? I'm sure if we whined enough, she would have eventually called them down so we could talk to them and get the mission!"

"I have a better idea." Oishi said. "And hopefully it'll be less abrasive."


	34. Beanies

Channel 34- Beanies

"Okay, so all you have to do is use your X-Ray vision to see in the room as we walk around the perimeter." Oishi explained to Choutarou as they approached the school with Eiji and Inui.

"Wait a second." Said Choutarou, putting his hands on his hips. "What makes you think I have X-Ray vision?"

"Don't you?" Oishi asked.

"Well yes, but what made you think that I did?" Choutarou said.

"The fact that you have every power." Eiji said.

"I do NOT have every power. Said Choutarou.

"All right." Said Inui as he walked up close to the wall while holding out the remote. "If this number goes down to an 18 we'll know that one of them is nearby, and that's when you'll have to check inside."

"And what happens when we find them?" Choutarou asked.

"We'll get them out of class somehow." Oishi shrugged.

"How?" said Choutarou.

"You probably have six or seven different powers that we could use." Oishi answered.

"Guys, I don't like you making fun of the fact that I have super powers." Choutarou sighed.

"We're not making fun of you." Said Eiji. "We're just using you!"

"Well, I don't like that either." Said Choutarou. "That was one of the reasons why I didn't want you all knowing I was a superhero!"

"Hey, here." Said Inui as the remote control suddenly descended to an 18. "One of them is in the room behind this wall."

"Go ahead, Ootori." Oishi offered.

Choutarou stepped forth and then attempted to use X-Ray vision, but he failed and turned around.

"Guys, this wall is made of brick, right?" he said, leaning against it.

"…Yeah." The three of them answered.

"Well, I can see through everything except brick." Choutarou said.

"What?" said Eiji. "That's stupid."

"I agree." Choutarou said. "And random."

"All right, then phase through it." Inui suggested.

"I can't phase through it either." Choutarou said.

"You're making this up." Said Oishi.

"No I'm not!" said Choutarou. "Honest!"

"How come you didn't have trouble phasing through the bank?" Eiji asked. "That was made out of brick."

"Oh well, at night that rule doesn't apply anymore." Choutarou explained. "It's weird, but I seem to be all right seeing and phasing through anything when it's nighttime."

The three eyed him.

"You're lying." Eiji decided.

"I'm not lying!" Choutarou whined.

"All right, all right." Said Inui. "Whether it be true or not, we can easily work this out. We'll just count the paces until we get to a door and then backtrack."

Inui started counting steps as he made his way to the closest door, only to find it locked from the outside.

"Now what?" Choutarou asked.

"You can phase through that door, can't you?" said Eiji. "Or can you not do that in the morning?"

Choutarou frowned. "I guess I could." He said.

With that, Choutarou went through the door and opened it up for the others.

"Sixty one paces that way." Inui said.

They started walking in the direction of the room they so desired, when suddenly, upon reaching step number thirty-two, they heard a bell ring off in the distance.

"What was that?" said Choutarou, looking slightly nervous.

"That is probably the bell to inform the students that passing time has begun." Inui sighed, sounding annoyed.

Just as he said that, all the doors to the classrooms on both sides of the hallway flung open and swarms of students exited the rooms. There was chaos and craziness in the halls for about five minutes, and as soon as the second bell rang, the halls were once again totally empty.

"That wasn't fair!" Eiji whined, throwing his hands up in the air.

"We might as well go to the classroom just to see who we were pursuing." Inui said. "With any luck, the teacher may know where that person was going next."

"With any luck…" Oishi repeated. "Yeah. Right."

Inui counted up to sixty-one and opened the door that was closest to where he finished.

"Excuse me?" Inui said to the teacher who was obviously a math teacher. Math teachers just have that look.

"May I help you?" said the math teacher.

"Do you have Kaidou Kaoru or Kamio Akira in the class that just ended?" Eiji asked.

"I have Kaidou Kaoru." The math teacher answered.

"Score!" said the group, doing a four-way high five.

"Do you know where he just went?" Oishi tried.

"Why would I know something like that?" asked the math teacher.

"Oh…"

The foursome looked dejected as they thanked the math teacher and closed the door.

"Look at this." Said Inui, looking at a schedule that was posted on the door. "It says here that lunch time is at eleven, which is approximately a half an hour from now."

"Let's head back to the field and tell everyone how it went!" said Choutarou.

"We should just go to the lunch room." Inui said. "That would be more logical."

"And wait around for a half an hour?" Choutarou said.

He mostly didn't want to wait around for a half an hour with a trio of people who were on the same tennis team and knew each other better than they knew him, inevitably leaving him out of future conversation that might occur within the group. But he didn't want to say that because he didn't want to look like a shallow jerk, so he finally agreed to go to the lunch room.

Finding the lunch room in the first place was somewhat of an adventure. They wanted to ask where it was, but then they figured that would look silly because why wouldn't students know where the lunch room was? Even though it was quite obvious that they weren't students at the particular school because THIS particular school WORE UNIFORMS. WTF.

And, while we're on the subject, said uniforms had green plaid pants (unless you were female, then it was a skirt), a matching tie, and a white colored shirt. The students also had a choice of hats between either a beanie or a beret, but at least one had to be worn at all times. Which was ridiculous.

"I can't wait to see Kaidou wearing a green plaid beanie." Said Eiji, looking excited as they discovered the lunch room and sat down at one of the tables that were right in the middle so they could see everyone that entered and left.

"That will truly be an amusing sight." Inui agreed.

"I hope the others aren't getting too bored." Oishi commented.

Meanwhile, back at the soccer field…

"Well, that wasn't as stimulating as I thought it would be." Momo sighed as he climbed out of the hole he had been digging.

Everyone was just sitting around watching him.

"I bet whoever plays on this field will be quite disappointed when they discover you dug a hole for no reason in the middle of it." Atobe commented.

"Well, I THOUGHT it would entertain me for more than fifteen minutes." Momo said as he started filling the hole back up and patting it down with the back of the shovel. "THERE! I hope that doesn't come back to haunt me."

"It probably will." Fuji said.

"Fuji, I've been meaning to ask you." Ryoma said since he was sitting next to Fuji.

"Yes?" Fuji said.

"We all had some time to go off and find some new clothes." Ryoma said. "Why didn't you buy boy's clothes?"

"I did buy boy's clothes." Fuji said, looking down at himself.

Ryoma stared at Fuji.

"Really?" he said.

"Yes." Fuji nodded.

Ryoma stared at Fuji some more.

"Oh." He said, puling his hat over his eyes.

"Mm." Fuji looked pleasantly up at the sky.

"Guys, I'm kind of bored." Kirihara said.

"We just have to wait for the others to get back." Oshitari said.

"I miss my horse." Taka sighed.

Then, back at the school…

"All right, lunch should be starting any minute." Inui looked up at the clock on the wall.

The four of them sat around the table with their hands folded for a few moments, and then the familiar bell rang again.

"YAY!" cheered the four of them.

They got up and started scouting the area, running to the entrance where a bunch of kids were coming in.

"Do you see either of them?" Eiji asked.

"Where are all those kids coming from?" Choutarou asked, pointing at kids that were coming in from another direction.

"There must be two entrances." Inui said. "We have to stand by both just in case they enter from over there."

Inui gestured for Choutarou to follow him since he wasn't going to even try to be the one to break up the Golden Pair.

It was difficult to find them, however, because everyone was wearing the exact same thing.

"Wait, is that…?" Choutarou leaned over and lifted up a kid's beanie.

"Hey!" said the kid who was not Kaidou or Kamio as he took his beanie back.

"Oh…sorry!" said Choutarou but the kid had already run off.

Inui looked around and noticed that they were now in a sea of green plaid and white tees.

"I think we had the right idea when we came here to find them." Said Inui. "But there are too many kids here all wearing the same thing."

"It is hard to distinguish one from another." Choutarou agreed. "Maybe I could use my tracking power!"

"Your tracking power?" Inui questioned.

"Yeah." Said Choutarou. "If you have something that belongs to the person you're looking for, I can find them."

"Like a dog?" Inui said.

"No." said Choutarou. "Because I'm not sniffing around."

"But it's the same concept." Inui said.

"I guess." Choutarou shrugged. "So do you want to try?"

"I don't have anything that belongs to either of them." Inui said.

"Oh right." Said Choutarou sadly.

"I think the best thing we can do at this point is regroup and find out if the boy's soccer team has a practice after school today." Inui said.

"But school won't end for such a long time." Choutarou pointed out.

"The smell of food is making me hungry anyway." Said Inui. "We have to eat at sometime."

"I guess…" Choutarou said.

They located Oishi and Eiji and explained the plan. They were a little reluctant to comply just as Choutarou had been, but after taking another look around the area, they quickly realized that there was no other way for it to be done as well.

They exited out the backdoor and found themselves disoriented. It was necessary to walk around the entire building in order to get to the soccer fields.

As they started walking, Inui's remote control began to beep again. He took it out and found the 18 slyly transform itself into a 17.

He ordered everyone to stop moving, and they all looked around, listening intently.

"—yeah, but he probably won't—"

"—he was stupid enough to do it the first time—"

They spun around and saw two people sitting against the building eating their lunches.

Two PARTICULAR people.

"Kaidou? Kamio?" Inui raised his voice a little bit.

The two stopped talking and looked up, noticing the group of four for the first time.

"Huh?" said Kamio, knowing that he knew these people from SOMEWHERE but not quite exactly sure who they were.

"Inui, Eiji and Oishi!" said Kaidou, standing up immediately. Then he looked at Choutarou. "And…Ootori? Or something?"

"Um…yeah." Said Choutarou.

"Kaidou, your beanie looks AWESOME." Said Eiji.

"Shut up!" said Kaidou, quickly taking his beanie off. "That's a real fair way to greet me!"

Kamio came walking over as well.

"Oh right, we DO know you guys!" said Kamio.

"What's going on?" Kaidou asked. "Do you know?"

"We could explain it if you so desired." Said Inui.

Kaidou and Kamio stared at Inui as if he was stupid, but Inui didn't start explaining.

"OBVIOUSLY WE WANT AN EXPLANATION." They yelled at him.

"Well fine." Said Inui, adjusting his glasses. "Sit down. I'll explain."


	35. Friendly Eating Place

Channel 35- Friendly Eating Place

"Oooohhhhh…" said Kaidou and Kamio as they looked at each other and nodded.

"I hope that cleared up a few questions you had." Inui said.

"Well, a few." Said Kamio sarcastically.

"I was wondering why you looked so odd." Said Kaidou, pointing at Oishi.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Oishi said.

"What?" said Kaidou. "You're a girl. IT LOOKS WEIRD."

"Why does EVERYONE have to keep bringing that up?" Oishi said despairingly.

"Because you're a girl." Kaidou said. "It's just not normal."

"I know it's not normal…" Oishi whined.

"So what have you two been up to?" said Eiji to Kaidou and Kamio.

"Well, once we figured everything out, we sorta just tried to act as though it was as normal as possible." Kamio answered.

"And you got bored…so you joined the soccer team?" Eiji guessed.

"No." said Kaidou, barely keeping himself from punching Eiji in the face. "That was something I guess our alternate Universe selves did."

"We're not bad." Kamio said, looking pleased with himself. "Kaidou's the leading goal scorer on the team."

"Oh?" said Choutarou. "Congratulations!"

"It's nothing to be proud of." Kaidou said, looking angsty. "It's just soccer."

"So why don't you guys just play tennis too?" Oishi asked. "Or did you get bad at tennis?"

"Pretty much." Kaidou and Kamio answered with the most ultimate sad looks on their faces.

"It's all right." Said Inui. "As I explained, once we receive and complete the mission in this Universe then we go to the next one. And now we only have seventeen more people we have to get, which is really close to half. Almost. Sort of."

"Okay, so what's the mission?" Kamio asked.

"We don't know yet." Said Eiji, leaning over to take a look at the remote to see that it was blank.

"We usually only get the mission when we're all together." Inui replied.

"Where's everyone else?" Kaidou asked.

"They're all at the soccer field." Choutarou said. "So let's all go there."

"Right now?" said Kamio, looking at his watch.

"Of course right now." Said Inui.

"But…if we miss any school…" Kamio paused and looked at Kaidou.

Kaidou frowned. "It's true." Kaidou said.

"What's true?" Eiji said. "You guys didn't say anything. You just trailed off and stood there."

"Oh." Said Kaidou. "If we miss any school then we won't be able to play in the game today."

Everyone waited.

"AND?" the four non-soccer players said.

"WHAT?" Kamio and Kaidou both demanded.

"Why does it matter if you can't play in the game?" said Oishi. "We're going to be leaving this Universe as soon as we complete the mission!"

"I know." Said Kaidou. "But we practiced for this all last week. And it's the qualifying game to get us into the finals on Wednesday."

"Yeah!" said Kamio. "If we don't win today then we can't go to the finals on Wednesday."

The four still waited.

"AND?" they demanded again.

"IT'S IMPORTANT TO US!" Kamio and Kaidou yelled.

"It's not that big of a deal." Said Eiji. "Like Oishi JUST said, we're seriously going to be leaving this Universe and never coming back. NEVER. And you guys will never play soccer again, unless you feel like playing it back in our own Universe."

"But we don't want to let the team down…" Kamio said.

"You two…" Oishi slapped his forehead.

"We'll meet up with you guys after school but before the game." Kaidou said. "But lunch is almost over and we can't be late for class."

"Are you guys being serious right now?" Oishi clarified.

"Yes…" said Kamio. "We'll do the mission right after the game! But this is a really important game."

"Guys," said Choutarou to Inui, Eiji and Oishi. "This game is really important to them. We all got an opportunity to do what we had to do in our own Universes! Oishi, you got to go on your date… and I wasn't there when the two of you did your things, but I'm sure you did things…"

"Ootori, just stop." Said Inui.

"All right." Said Choutarou since even he had to admit that what he was saying was ludicrous.

Just then, the bell rang.

"So after school meet us in the locker room." Said Kamio as he and Kaidou started walking away. "It's right around that way connected to the gym. We'll talk more then."

"But you can't come, Oishi." Said Kaidou. "Since you're a girl and everything."

"Stop bringing it up!" Oishi called after him as the two left.

"I can't believe they just did that!" said Eiji, looking absolutely shocked as he did absurdly over animated arm gestures in their direction.

"Well, we don't have any choice I guess." Said Inui.

The quartet went back to the soccer fields were everyone was still waiting. Surprisingly, no one had killed anyone else quite yet. And believe me, saying, "I'm going to kill you!" wasn't such an empty threat anymore because they could actually kill one another and not really have any consequences.

And it was also quite surprising when no one was needlessly sacrificed after Inui calmly explained what Kamio and Kaidou had decided.

"So they just walked away." Fuji said.

"Yeah." Said Inui.

"They just…just like that?" Fuji made sure.

"Um…yeah." Inui said.

"And, even though they knew that I was stuck as a girl?" Fuji said.

"Well, they knew I was a girl, but I don't think they knew you were." Oishi said.

"Yet…they still just walked away?" Fuji asked yet again.

"Yeah." Said Eiji.

Fuji gave a heavy sigh. "I see." He said as he started walking towards the school with a smile plastered on his face.

Luckily, everyone tackled him and dragged him back over to away from the school.

"We all have to eat anyway." Said Momo. "I'm so hungry."

"Why are you all dirty?" Choutarou asked.

"He dug a hole." Shishido answered.

"I could have answered!" Momo said.

"You would have made it sound less lame than it actually is." Shishido crossed his arms.

"You made it sound MORE lame than it actually is!" said Momo.

"I don't need to make it sound more lame." Said Shishido. "It's already the epitome of lameness."

"I suppose we could all agree on some place to eat." Said Atobe, standing up and running his hand through his hair like he was in an Herbal Essence commercial. And I'll be damned if at least half of the people present weren't temporarily turned on, for a few seconds at least.

A few minutes later, they were all in a pizza joint called the Friendly Eating Place.

"This place sure is friendly." Said Taka.

They all stared at him.

"What?" said Taka, looking a little embarrassed.

"Nothing." They all replied.

After everyone ordered, they sat down and pretty much took up half of the restaurant with their large mass.

"Aw man…" Ryoma said as he dropped his pizza in his lap.

Everyone who had seen it happen chuckled at him because no matter how many times they saw it, it was still funny.

They tried to schmooze it up for as long as possible.

"So…how's our rate of finding people now?" Kirihara tried.

"Did you seriously just ask me that?" said Inui. "Don't ask me that."

"What?" said Kirihara. "Call me crazy, but I just REALLY want to go home!"

"I JUST did the math a couple of days ago." Said Inui. "Actually, I think it was yesterday. Nothing has changed since then. Don't ask me again until we only have fifteen people remaining."

"Fine…" said Kirihara, looking rejected.

"In retrospect, I'm thinking I probably should have gone with a long sleeved shirt." Oshitari said randomly.

"Why?" asked Choutarou since he happened to be sitting across from Oshitari and was one of the only people listening him.

"Because." Said Oshitari, looking at his gray arm. "I'm still black and white, and I should have gone with the outfit that covered up the most of me so it wasn't as obvious that I was black and white."

"Well, people would still be able to see your face." Choutarou pointed out.

"Maybe everyone just thinks you have a really strange skin disease." said Shishido, taking a sip of his Hi-C Boppin Berry Fruit Punch.

"A skin disease that turns your skin gray?" Oshitari said. "So very consistently?"

"Well, I SAID really strange." Shishido said, rolling his eyes.

"I despise not having color." Said Atobe.

"I despise not having a—" Fuji began, but Taka threw his hand over his mouth before he could finish.

"You know what?" said Oishi. "I, too, despise not having a—" But he was unable to finish as well because Eiji threw his hand over HIS mouth.

"A what?" Choutarou said. "What is it?"

"Nothing, Choutarou." Said Shishido. "Forget about it."

"Hey, do we know what time Kaidou and Kamio's school ends?" Momo questioned.

"Um… no." said Oishi. Then he looked at Inui. "Do we?"

"I didn't happen to glance at that time on the schedule." Inui said.

"We'll just have to wait outside the boy's locker room until they show up." Oshitari said.

"Won't that look a little strange?" Eiji asked. "A group of ten boys and two girls waiting outside the boy's locker room for a while? WEIRD!"

"OH MY GOD EIJI, please don't call me a girl again." Said Oishi.

"Yes, it is starting to get on my nerves too." Said Fuji as he raised his perfectly manicured nails. "It reminds me of nails scraping down a chalkboard."

"Don't you like that sound though, Fuji?" said Kirihara.

Fuji whipped his head around faster than the speed of light but Kirihara hid behind a menu.

"All right, all right." Said Inui before anyone could kill each other like they so desired. "I think Oshitari's plan is our only option at this point. We'll just try not to look creepy about it."

"I think that might be difficult." Atobe said with a sigh.

"There is SO much waiting around time." Ryoma said as he dipped a French fry in ketchup and started to move it towards his mouth and everyone leaned in to make sure they didn't miss out on the fun, but Ryoma paused while the fry was still over the plate.

They waited, and Ryoma stared at them.

"Yeah right." Said Ryoma. "I'm not going to mess up eating again just for all of you to laugh at me."

He put the French fry back on his plate, but his elbow knocked the entire thing off the table and it landed on his head, FACE DOWN, so the ketchup got on his hat and the remaining French fries fell on his lap.

Everyone was quiet for a minute.

Then they pointed.

Then they laughed.

It was glorious.


	36. Prince of Soccer

Channel 36- Prince of Soccer

"You guys have been waiting out here this entire time?" Kamio looked surprised as he and Kaidou approached the boy's locker room to discover the massive twelve person group.

"Well, we couldn't go in." said Eiji, trying to subtly gesture at Oishi and Fuji but they knew exactly what he was doing so they were offended.

"Well, we don't really have a lot of time to talk since we have to get ready for the game." Kaidou said.

"Listen, we let you guys go through an entire day of school because you asked us to, but now you're going to stay right here until we get our mission." Atobe said.

"Kaidou, Kamio, what are you two doing still out here?" said a random coach man as he walked over. His name was Christopher Cringle. "Get ready for the game!"

"Right, coach!" they both said as the coach went in the locker room.

Kamio and Kaidou were about to follow him when they were stopped by an angry mob.

"HELLO?" they all yelled.

"You heard him!" said Kamio. "The game!"

"We can't be late or we'll be benched for the first half of the game." Kaidou said.

"It doesn't matter." Said Inui. "We'll be leaving this Universe as soon as well complete the…"

He trailed off because his remote control beeped. He pulled it out, read it over and then stepped to the side.

"Good luck in your game." Inui said.

"All right." Said Kamio and Kaidou as they sidestepped around the others and went inside.

"What was the mission?" said Ryoma. "Don't tell me that it was for them to win their game today."

"It's not." Said Inui.

"Good." Said everyone else.

"What is it then?" Shishido asked.

"For them to win their game on Wednesday." Inui said, showing the remote control to everyone. It read, 'Win the finals'.

"This is the worst mission ever!" said Kirihara. "There's nothing we can do to help them!"

"I guess we could support them the best we can." Said Choutarou.

"Yeah!" said Eiji. "Oishi and Fuji can join the cheerleading team and the rest of us could—"

He was forced to stop speaking because he was promptly warned by everyone else that Fuji and Oishi were both about to go on the warpath. Getting Fuji on the warpath is not that big of a deal but if you manage get Oishi on the warpath (especially if you're EIJI) then you know you've gone too far.

"Wait, so they have to win today AND Wednesday and then the mission is complete?" said Oshitari.

"Yes." Said Inui. "And for the first time, we don't get a second chance at this mission. If we fail, we have to wait until _next year_."

Everyone gasped. "NEXT YEAR?"

"Next year." Inui replied. "So it is essential they win both games."

"Maybe I WILL join the cheerleading team…" said Oishi, and he was of course entirely joking.

"I'll join if you join!" said Eiji excitedly.

"No, Eiji." Said Oishi. "No."

"I'll join if both of you join." Fuji said.

"No!" said Oishi adamantly.

"Fine, I'll join if Fuji joins!" said Eiji.

"And I'll join if Eiji joins." Said Fuji.

The two of them paused for a moment.

"Okay…" they both said, looking at each other.

About twenty minutes later, the boy's soccer team was out on the field stretching and warming up while the away team arrived. Both school's names have not yet been specified, so we'll just name them now. The challenging school's name was Shuukyuu's School For Boys and their colors were pink and purple. People make fun of them all the time. The school that Kamio and Kaidou attend, however, was called St. Nicolas and their colors were obviously green and white.

Fuji joined the rest of the group.

"What's up?" said Oishi. "I thought you were going to join the cheerleading team."

"I actually came very close to doing it." Fuji admitted. "But they said they didn't need anymore girls. Apparently the only boy on the team got injured a few days ago, so they took Eiji."

"Wait, so now Eiji's on the cheerleading team?" said Oishi.

"So it would seem." Fuji said.

"But…he's more of a girl than we are." Oishi said.

"That's what I tried to say." Fuji shrugged.

That's when Eiji ran over wearing green sweatpants and a t-shirt that had "ST. NICOLAS" written across the front.

"Hey guys!" he said. "Guess what I am now?"

"Um… a cheerleader?" Momo tried.

"Yeah!" said Eiji. "Isn't that great?"

"…" no one really knew how to respond.

So Eiji decided to make his question more specific. "Oishi, isn't the fact that I'm a cheerleader great?"

"Um, sure, it's great Eiji." Said Oishi.

"Hurray!" cheered Eiji as he ran off.

"That right there made me feel uncomfortable." Shishido said.

Kaidou randomly came jogging up to them. "So you all came to watch?" he said. "With the exception of Eiji who has already managed to somehow make himself one of the cheerleaders?"

"Yes and yes." Ryoma answered.

"Play your best." Said Choutarou. "Our mission—"

"Can wait until the end of the game." Said Inui. "We're in no rush."

"All right." Said Kaidou. "Because I wasn't going to leave the game early anyway."

Then he ran off.

"Why didn't you tell him that the mission was that he had to win the games?" said Oshitari.

"Because then he'll be under too much pressure." Inui said. "Kaidou ALREADY stresses himself out enough before and during games. If he knows that our ability to leave this Universe depended on his ability to play in this game then he would probably freak out."

"Good call Inui." Said Momo. "That's why we keep you."

Inui decided not to talk to Momo anymore.

Coach Cringle called all of his players over to him and started making a game play. The game was about to start and Eiji was over with the cheerleaders already showing off his acrobatic tennis skillz and they had pretty much just started cheering for him.

Sure enough, Kaidou and Kamio were both starters and they were both out front. As soon as the referee blew the whistle, the intense game of soccer began. It was all a match to eventually determine who was THE PRINCE OF SOCCER!

"I've never really watched a soccer match before." Atobe admitted. "I'd be lying if I said I knew entirely what was going on."

"Well," Oshitari started. "When the ball goes out of the zone, the player on the team that didn't kick it out in the first place gets to serve the ball to his own player."

"Seems fair enough." Atobe said. "And obviously the object of the match is to hit the ball into the net, as ludicrous as that sounds."

"Yeah…imagine that…a game where you're actually TRYING to hit the net." Shishido said.

"And…" Choutarou started as the goalie received the ball and then punted it over the half line. "I see. When the person guarding the net receives the ball, he has to kick it over to the other team's court or else it doesn't count."

"Soccer is actually quite similar to tennis." Shishido commented.

Everyone who was not on Hyoutei decided to take a few steps away from them because they didn't want people to think they were as stupid as them.

"Anyone can see that it counts even when the ball doesn't reach the opposing team's court…" said Kirihara.

"Duh." Said all the others.

Everyone watched as Kamio zinged up and down the field, totally in the rhythm. When he had the ball, the only thing that could stop him was if he either collided with someone or if he was tripped illegally. Kamio was probably the only kid in the entire middle school league who could receive his own pass. Unfortunately, he didn't have a fancy kick that would put the ball in the net.

Kaidou, however, could easily stay in the entire game and hung out at center field. Whenever the ball came to him, he trapped it and then tried his best to run down the field in order to set up for his famous kick.

THE BOOMERANG SNAKE…KICK!

Don't ask me how he does it or how it works. After all, not even physics can explain how the Boomerang Snake itself works. But the Boomerang Snake KICK is essentially a ball that looks as though it will go out of bounds, but then curls around the back of the net and goes right into the goal. And, to add to it all, when it bounces on the ground, it comes back out and hits the goalie in the back of the head. It is grand, I tell you. Grand. Just don't ask me to explain how it works. JUST KNOW THAT IT DOES!

Though, sadly, Kaidou does not have the moves to make it down there all the time. He often gets the ball taken away from him because he tries to just plow right through the defense.

In what was likely the SHORTEST first half of all time, the score stood at 0-0. As in LOVE LOVE. As in a freakin' tie.

"Maybe we should tell them that this game is really important to the mission—" Taka began but he was suddenly distracted because the cheerleaders had all run out to do their half time show.

"ALL RIGHT BOYS." Said Coach Cringle. "We have to split the defense and utilize the corner kicks and make our throw-ins go to the correct people and…"

He continued to ramble as all the boys just huddled around and nodded and agreed and various other things.

Eiji then ran over to the team. "Coach and Team!" he exclaimed. "The girls and I have concocted a cheer that will turn this half-hearted game into a smoldering volcano of torrid passion!"

"Don't make me hurt you…" Kaidou started but Eiji ran back over to the cheerleaders and they proceeded to jump and do cartwheels and shriek various incoherent things.

"WHY is he a cheerleader?" Kamio said to Kaidou.

"Don't ask me." Said Kaidou.

The game began the second half and it officially became time to own the pink and purple Shuukyuu School For Boys.

But the ownage did not begin until the very last few minutes of the game.

"SMOLDERING VOLCANO OF TORRID PASSION!" Eiji shrieked as Kamio ran by with the ball.

"Shut up!" said Kamio. "You're throwing off my rhythm!"

He kicked the ball towards the net, where Kaidou happened to be waiting. Kaidou collected the ball and did his famous BOOMERANG SNAKE KICK! And how the hell do you stop one of those coming at you?

"GOAL!" said the referee, blowing his whistle.

"Yes." Said Kaidou, doing a tiny gesture of victory.

Everyone cheered as the referee ordered them to set up for another kick-off. But almost as they were kicking off, the game ended and everyone threw another little party.

Especially those who did not belong in this Universe.

Oh Lord, were they happy.


	37. Soon To Be Finals

Channel 37- Soon To Be Finals

"WHAT?" Kaidou yelled as they walked home from school since obviously not all of them would fit on the bus.

"Yes, the mission is for you guys to win the final game." Inui answered.

"You should have told us!" said Kamio, looking depressed. "I know I would have played a lot harder!"

"What happens if we don't win the finals?" said Kaidou.

"We have to stay here until you two win the finals." Said Inui. "So if you lose, we'll have to wait until next year for you to try again."

"And staying here for as long as we are is painful enough." Said Atobe. "I need more clothes for tomorrow and the day after."

"Why do you have gray skin?" Kamio asked.

"A skin disease." Oshitari answered.

"Oh." Said Kamio. "Sorry." Then he looked around. "Hey, is Tachibana here yet?"

"No." said Kirihara. "You're the first person who isn't on Seigaku or Hyoutei and isn't ME."

"Do you guys know where Tachibana is?" Kamio asked.

"We don't know where anyone else is." Inui answered. "We're faced with these Universes as we get there."

"What other Universes has there been?" said Kaidou. "I mean, I know there's been a Girls Universe, but other than that you all mostly look the same. Except for Atobe and Oshitari who are both gray."

"But it's a skin disease." Kamio reminded him.

"No it isn't." said Atobe. "We were in Detective Universe. It was black and white there."

"Oh." Said Kamio, looking at Oshitari. "Why didn't you say that? You got me all concerned."

"I thought it was obvious that I was lying." Oshitari admitted.

"Ryoma was in the Mary-Sue Universe and now he can't play tennis or even eat right." Said Momo.

"Back off." Said Ryoma as he tripped and fell on his face.

"Or walk right." Momo added between laughs.

Everyone enjoyed a good laugh at Ryoma's expense.

"Most of us wear different clothes for our Universes but we changed when we got here, figuring we stuck out too much." Taka explained. "Like me who was wearing an entire suit of armor, or Inui and Momo who were both dressed as pirates."

"Yeah, and I've been meaning to ask about that patch." Said Kaidou. "I just thought it was too awkward to bring it up because I thought maybe you'd be sensitive about it or something."

"I AM." Said Inui. "Don't ask about the patch."

"Why?" said Kaidou. "What's underneath it?"

"I told you I'm sensitive about it." Said Inui. "So don't ask."

"He hasn't looked yet." Eiji said.

Just then, they came to a crossroads.

"We're down that way." Said Shishido, pointing to the left.

"Our houses are both this way." Kaidou said.

"Where are you guys staying?" Kamio asked.

"At some hotel nearby." Said Oishi.

"Where did you get money to stay at a hotel?" Kamio said.

"We robbed a bank." Fuji replied.

"Robbed a bank?" Kaidou repeated.

"Well, Ootori robbed the bank." Fuji revised. "The rest of us just watched."

"They MADE me!" said Choutarou, looking upset.

Kaidou cleared his throat. "So what are we doing?" he asked. "Kamio and I can't miss school tomorrow or the day after or else we won't be able to play in the game on Wednesday."

"Well, then obviously you must continue going to school." Inui said. "The rest of us will bide our time and find something to do."

"I am NOT going to be able to go to school knowing that soon we're going to be jumping around to different Universes." Said Kamio and then he paused a moment or two to consider what he had said. "Hopefully."

"Now, now." Said Inui. "I think what we should do right now is all go to the Friendly Eating Place and have dinner."

"Friendly Eating Place?" said Kaidou. "That place is really satisfying."

"I know, I got that feeling too." Said Choutarou.

"Oh, we can't." said Kamio. "We have a big history project due tomorrow that we've put off until tonight."

"Right." Said Kaidou. "Good call on that one."

"Do you guys do everything together in this Universe?" said Momo.

"What?" said Kaidou. "He's the only person I know."

"Same here!" said Kamio.

"All right…fine… you guys go do your history project and we'll go to the Friendly Eating Place WITHOUT you." Said Eiji.

"Eiji, by the way, don't ever do cheerleading again." Kaidou warned.

"Aww…but I was good at it…" Eiji frowned.

"Just don't." said Kaidou. "Seriously. I am not kidding."

"All right, fine…" said Eiji sadly.

The two groups parted ways, and the larger of the two went to the Friendly Eating Place where they not only were satisfied with their meals, but got to enjoy a good chuckle at Ryoma's pathetic expense.

They returned to the hotel where they once again split up into the predetermined rooms.

In Room 1…

Oishi was coming out of the bathroom and Eiji was sitting there on one of the beds staring at him.

"What?" said Oishi.

"I know you don't like me bringing it up…" Eiji said slowly. "But uh…what's that uh…" he gestured his head towards the bathroom. "What's that like?"

"You know what, Eiji?" said Oishi. "That is one of the LAST things that I want to talk about. Especially before I go to bed."

"Sorry, I was just curious." Eiji frowned as he hid under the covers.

Oishi immediately felt bad for what he said.

"You know Eiji…" said Oishi. "I've said a lot of not really that nice things to you while I've been like this and I know you're just trying to be supportive and act like nothing's wrong…"

"Yeah…" said Eiji with the best pout face as he nodded.

"I would just prefer if you acted as though everything is normal… by acting as though everything is normal." Oishi said. "Like… pretend as though I'm NOT a girl."

"But you are a girl, Oishi." Said Eiji. "That's what makes it hard to pretend."

Oishi's eyes narrowed. "Good night now, Eiji." He said.

"Good night, Oishi!" said Eiji. "I'm glad we had this talk!"

In Room 2…

"You TOLD them about your tracking power?" Shishido groaned, slapping his forehead.

"Shishido…I'm sorry…" said Choutarou, bowing his head in shame. "They're already assuming that I have every power."

"WHY are they assuming that?" said Shishido. "You obviously have your limitations! What if we came across your one weakness? What then?"

"Oh and they made fun of the fact that I can't phase or see through brick when it's daytime…" Choutarou said.

"Why?" said Shishido. "They can NEVER phase through or see through brick."

"I know." Said Choutarou. "I should have said that, Shishido! I never know what to say, and then I look back at it later and think of a hundred things I should have said."

"It's all right, Choutarou." Said Shishido. "Now you have something you can say the next time they try to make fun of you about one of your powers."

"Yeah!" said Choutarou. "But I know I'll just forget."

"Don't worry about it, Choutarou." Said Shishido. "I'LL remember!"

"You'll stick up for me?" said Choutarou, his eyes lighting up.

"Choutarou, come on!" said Shishido. "When have I NOT stuck up for you?"

"Shishido, you're such a great friend!" said Choutarou. "I'm so proud to save the world with you while we're superheroes and to play doubles with you when we get back to our original Universe!"

"Right back at you, Choutarou!" said Shishido.

In Room 3…

"This is SO dumb!" Ryoma whined from the bathroom.

Momo was already lying in bed so he was starting to get annoyed with Ryoma's constant yelling from the bathroom. He finally got up to investigate to find Ryoma standing in front of the mirror with a toothbrush in his hand and some toothpaste smeared all of his face.

"What are you doing?" Momo said, at a loss for anything else to say.

"I can't even brush my teeth without failing." Said Ryoma.

Momo was at a loss. Again.

"How did you brush your teeth for the twelve days you were in the Mary-Sue Universe?" he asked.

"Usually, whenever I had to brush my teeth, Sutefuani helped me." Ryoma answered.

"She helped you brush your teeth?" Momo said, slowly losing the will to live.

"She helped me with everything." Said Ryoma. "In case you haven't noticed, my shoes have been untied ever since we ruthlessly murdered her…"

"Why do you think you're so incompetent?" demanded Momo. "If you let her do EVERYTHING then obviously you wouldn't be able to do ANYTHING!"

"I'm so ashamed…" Ryoma said truthfully.

In Room 4…

"How many more of our teammates have we not encountered?" Atobe said.

"Gakuto," Oshitari said immediately as he changed his bed sheets. "And… let's see… Jirou. Hiyoshi. Kabaji." He paused a moment. "I believe that's all."

"Assuming only the Regulars are being affected." Atobe said.

"That is assuming a lot." Said Oshitari. "For all we know, none of the others are enduring this torture as we are."

"But most of Seigaku has already appeared." Atobe pointed out. "They only have to find Tezuka."

"Is that so?" said Oshitari. "I wonder if that Inui has any control over where he goes next, and it just so happens that he went on a loser streak for three Universes in a row accidentally picked up the two of us, Kirihara and Shishido and Ootori."

"What do you mean?" said Atobe.

"Have you noticed how EVERYONE is on Seigaku recently?" said Oshitari. "And prior to Detective, Cowboy and Superhero Universes, it was only Seigaku. And the only reason Kamio's here is because one of their Seigaku people was in the same Universe."

"Hm…so you think he will just find the rest of his own teammates, namely Tezuka, and just call it quits on the rest?" Atobe said.

"Yes." Said Oshitari. "He SAYS he doesn't have control over where he goes and that the counter must reach zero. But how can we trust someone as strange as that?"

"I suppose we can't…" Atobe rubbed his chin.

In Room 5…

"Taka," said Fuji as he sat in bed with a pondering expression.

"Yeah?" said Taka as he got into his OWN bed.

"I loath this female body I am in." Fuji said.

"Oh." Said Taka. "Sorry."

"No, I really do." Fuji said with a sigh. "And I was thinking about what happened in the Mary-Sue Universe."

"You mean when we all died?" Taka asked.

"Yes, that." Fuji said.

"What about it?" Taka said.

"Everyone came back to life when we went to the next Universe." Fuji said.

"Thankfully." Said Taka.

"So I'm wondering…" Fuji went on. "What if I were just to kill myself every time we entered a new Universe? That way, I wouldn't have to deal with going through all these missions, and time would pass very quickly instead of having to loiter around for days in hotels."

Taka considered this.

"It's not like I have any weapons so I'm not very useful if we were in a battle like a few that you've told me about." Fuji said.

"Yeah but Fuji." Said Taka. "You killed Sutefuani, remember? The rest of us failed and YOU killed her."

Fuji stopped and considered this.

"That's right." He said. "I did. All right. Never mind. You've convinced me, Taka. Good night."

Fuji lied back down and immediately went to sleep, bursting into giddy giggles as he enjoyed his slumber. Taka only sat there and looked depressed.

Finally, in Room 6…

Sorry. They're already sleeping.


	38. Desperate Measures

Channel 38- Desperate Measures

That morning everyone had thought that maybe they'd get to sleep in since they didn't even have to do anything until tomorrow but they were rudely awakened by Inui walking into each one of their rooms and tossing something on their heads.

"What's this?" said Kirihara, sitting up and picking up the bag that Inui had thrown at him. Since he had the misfortune of being in the same room as Inui, he had to hear the entire explanation.

"The Jounetsu Middle School is about an hour drive away." Inui said. "If we take the bus, we'll be there in about an hour and half."

"Okay…" said Kirihara as he looked inside the bag and pulled out some clothing. "So…what's this?"

"They're the uniforms for the Jounetsu Middle School." Inui answered.

Kirihara still looked confused.

"St. Nicolas, the name of Kamio and Kaidou's school, is playing against Jounetsu tomorrow." Inui said. "We're going to go to the school and gather data on their tennis team, and maybe even disable a few of their better players to ensure that we win."

"So…why do we have to wear the uniforms?" Kirihara said.

"So we don't stick out as much." Inui said.

"Aha." Said Kirihara, rolling his eyes.

The uniform consisted of a pair of black pants and a white colored tee. At least they didn't have to wear ties. Or beanies.

They all met out in the lobby changed in their uniforms.

"Inui, I know Fuji and I are both girls but couldn't you have gotten us the MALE'S UNIFORMS?" Oishi demanded, losing his temper.

Sure enough, both Oishi and Fuji were wearing black skirts and a more feminine top instead of the pants and the tees they so desired.

"I'm sorry." Said Inui. But he probably wasn't sorry at all.

"Do we ALL have to go?" said Atobe, applying a lint roller to his pants.

"No." said Inui. "In theory, I only have to go because I'm the only one who can collect data effectively. However, if we wish to eliminate any of the players, then we'll have plenty of people to sacrifice."

"Sacrifice?" Shishido questioned.

"Of course." Said Inui. "If you harm another person, it's considered assault. Which is a crime. Of course you'll go to jail."

"JAIL?" they all yelled.

"But you won't be there long because we'll be leaving this Universe soon anyway, so you'll just be a sacrifice." Inui said.

"But what if they don't end up winning the game?" said Taka. "And we end up being here for an extra year and are in jail for that entire time?"

"Well, we're all too young for jail anyway." Said Inui. "It'll probably just be Juvenile Hall or something like that."

"That didn't answer my question." Taka said.

"Let's go." Said Inui, STILL avoiding the question. "We'll head to Jounetsu and begin our data gathering."

"Inui, this plan sounds somewhat sadistic." Ryoma said.

"Fuji helped me think it up on the sidelines yesterday." Inui replied.

"That would explain it." Ryoma said.

They went to the bus station and waited for the bus. Then they got on the bus. Then they rode the bus.

About an hour and a half later, they reached Jounetsu Middle School and wandered about on the campus.

"Where are the soccer fields?" Momo questioned.

"How am I supposed to know?" said Inui as he looked at a map of the school.

"Probably because you're holding a map of the school?" Momo suggested.

"Be quiet." Said Inui. "I'm going to give you all a picture, name and information about one of the starters on the Jounetsu soccer team. It's your job to find that person, stalk him, and if the opportunity presents itself, you should injure that person or kill him."

"Inui, frankly, I really don't like when you talk all scary like this." Said Eiji.

"Just take the picture and information and do what you wish." Said Inui as he opened up a folder that he also happened to be holding and started handing out pictures and information.

"When and how did you gather all this stuff?" Choutarou asked as he shifted through his information that he received.

"I'm not at liberty to tell." Inui said.

"Hey wait, how come you don't have anyone?" Oishi asked.

"Because there are only eleven players on a soccer team." Inui answered. "And there are twelve of us. I am the most important because I'm going to gather data and relay it back to St. Nicolas. Besides, I have the remote control. There. Three reasons."

Everyone grumbled and eyed Inui, then they all separated.

"I'm going to get this over with quickly so I don't have to wear this anymore." Said Fuji as he and Oishi flocked together since they both… are girls.

"How?" Oishi asked.

"I'm just going to walk right up and get what I want." Said Fuji as he went right into the school.

Oishi followed after him hesitantly as Fuji went straight up to two guys wearing the school uniform and talking in the hallway.

"Ohmygosh," said Fuji as he held up the picture and pointed at it. "Where can I find this super hottie on the soccer team?"

At first, the two boys just looked at him.

"You know he's gay, right?" said the first boy.

Fuji looked at the picture.

"Oh." He said with a frown.

"But you know…I'm not." Said the second boy.

"Oh TEE HEE, you're so big and strong too, I bet." Said Fuji.

"Um…hee hee?" said Oishi, holding up the picture of the boy HE was supposed to find. "Seen this super hottie around? Anywhere? Oh my god? Tee hee? Oh my god?"

"We have to go to class." Said the first boy as the two of them left.

"Well that failed on every account." Said Fuji to Oishi.

"I don't get it." Said Oishi. "Why did they completely ignore me?"

Fuji only put his hand on Oishi's shoulder and shook his head.

Meanwhile, all the people who had something against attacking random people decided to hang around the playground that was across the street for the elementary school kids.

"WEEEEE!" said Eiji as he swung on the swings by himself.

Meanwhile again… SMASH BAM BOOM!

Shishido and Choutarou were being Silver Man and Silver Boy and were both on the roof looking in.

"You know," said Choutarou. "If we weren't in an alternate Universe then I probably wouldn't be doing this."

"Yeah, me too." said Shishido as he looked at the picture. "Well… maybe. It depends on my mood."

"I feel like Silver Man is more of a villain than a hero in this Universe." Choutarou sighed. "First I robbed a bank and now I'm attacking a harmless person."

"Well, don't worry." Said Shishido. "In the next world, we'll definitely be heroes again, okay?"

"Okay, Shishido!" said Choutarou excitedly.

They looked down at the two members of the soccer team as they studied together in the library.

"So what's the plan?" Choutarou asked.

"Okay," said Shishido as he pulled his giant spear out of his utility belt. "I'll break the window and repel down a rope and then impale my guy in the knee with this. That way, he doesn't die but he definitely won't be able to play tomorrow."

"All right…" said Choutarou. "What should I do?"

"I don't know." Said Shishido, leaning over and looking at the info on Choutarou's person. "Your guy is the goalie… how about…I've got it! You could just walk right up to him and break his hand."

"Just like that?" said Choutarou.

"Sure." Said Shishido. "And then grab me and we'll fly away."

"Okay." Said Choutarou. "No one will know it was us!"

"Of course not!" said Shishido. "Ready?"

"Ready!" said Choutarou.

Meanwhile, Momo, Taka and Ryoma were all working together.

At first, they were trying to seek out their people, but then a teacher demanded to know why they weren't in class. They tried to think up excuses, but it was hard to think of anything because the three of them were together so of course they wouldn't be going to the bathroom. So it finally got out that they didn't actually attend the school so the teacher kicked them out.

Now they were outside the school on their asses.

They saw Eiji across the street playing on the playground so they shrugged and went over there to join him.

Again with the meanwhiles…Atobe and Oshitari were in the cafeteria looking around for their people they were supposed to attack or kill.

Some random kid walked up to them.

"Why are you guys gray?" he said.

"How dare you." Said Oshitari.

"What?" said the kid.

"You are RACIST." Said Oshitari.

"…Huh?" said the kid.

"Obviously we are from a foreign country and EVERYONE there is gray." Said Atobe. "How dare you. I am going to report you and have you thrown off the… do you play a sport?"

"Soccer." Said the kid nervously.

"Thrown off the SOCCER TEAM." Said Atobe with a nod, looking satisfied.

"Come on, we'll take this to the important people who can make these decisions." Said Oshitari as he stood up and grabbed the boy by the ear, dragging him off.

As soon as they took him around the corner, they roughed him up a little bit. More than they should have, but at least they didn't break any necks, right?

MEANWHILE Kirihara was all by himself. Still. Because no one likes him.

He was in the basement of the school with a large stick of dynamite he had discovered on his person.

He set it up and clocked it to explode in exactly ten minutes.

He exited the school and walked to the soccer field where he found Inui sitting, already taking notes on only the lord knows what.

"Has anyone gotten back yet?" Kirihara asked.

"Well, Eiji, Taka, Momo and Ryoma have been playing on the playground this entire time." Inui said. "Shishido and Ootori joined them a little while ago because they completed their tasks. Fuji and Oishi returned about five minutes ago and joined them."

"So everyone except for Oshitari and Atobe?" Kirihara said.

"Pretty much." Said Inui.

"IT'S GONNA BLOW!" came voices behind them.

They turned around to see Oshitari and Atobe running away from the building as fast as they could and then diving just as it exploded into a mushroom cloud.

Inui's mouth hung open as he witnessed what had just occurred.

"Oh wow." Said Atobe, standing up and brushing himself off. "If we hadn't both simultaneously heard that ticking at the very last second, we would have likely been caught in that explosion as well."

"What did you two do?" Inui demanded, pointing at the damage.

"Actually I did it." Said Kirihara.

"WHY?" said Inui.

"Because this was easier than seeking out a single person!" said Kirihara defensively.

At that exact moment, everyone who had been on the playground came running over.

"What's going on?" demanded Eiji of Atobe and Oshitari. "You two blew up the whole building!"

"It was Kirihara." Oshitari said. "Though I do envy him for thinking up the idea before me."

"I think we should probably get out of here." Momo suggested.

"Yes…probably…" said Inui.

With that, the entire group took off running.


	39. Annoying

Channel 39- Annoying

They made a stop at the hotel and changed their clothes and when they got back to the St. Nicolas School, they found that the entire population was outside of the school.

"What's going on?" said Shishido to some random person.

"Apparently, the Jounetsu School just spontaneously combusted so we all got evacuated so they could find out if ours is going to do the same." The person answered.

"I see…spontaneously combusted…" they all said nervously as they backed away from the person.

"I don't like the fact that that whole school exploded." Said Choutarou.

"Most of us don't like it either, Choutarou." Said Shishido. "I can't speak for all of us though."

"No you can't." said Fuji.

"Well, let's look at the upside of this whole ordeal." Said Kirihara. "Right guys? Now that school definitely has to forfeit the finals! Meaning we win by default, right?"

"I suppose." Said Inui, looking at the remote and seeing that it said 'Complete' where the mission once was. "But now we have to find Kamio and Kaidou or else the white light won't come and we won't be able to leave."

"Then let's find them!" said Momo.

"How do we start?" Ryoma said.

"Yeah." Said Oishi. "We have that problem again where everyone is wearing the same clothes and standing around in one big area."

"That's why I borrowed some things from Kaidou and Kamio when we last encountered them." Inui said, pulling two beanies from out of his pocket.

Everyone stared at him.

"Wow, Inui." Said Oshitari. "You stole their beanies."

"Here." Inui handed the two beanies to Choutarou.

"I don't want them." Said Choutarou.

"NO." said Inui. "I want you to use your tracking power that you told me about yesterday."

"Ohhh…" said Choutarou. "Well…what day is it? Tuesday?"

"…Yes." Said Inui.

"That power doesn't work on Tuesdays." Choutarou admitted.

"You're making that up!" Momo said immediately.

"No he's not!" said Shishido. "Are you calling Choutarou a liar?"

"No, I'm just calling him lazy!" said Momo. "He just doesn't want to use his power to make our lives easier!"

"He legitimately can't use that power on Tuesdays!" said Shishido. "It's not his fault and you can't blame him for it!"

"But that's just STUPID!" said Momo. "There's no reason for that power to not work on Tuesdays!"

"You're just jealous because you can NEVER use a tracking power!" said Shishido.

"It's true!" said Momo as he covered his face and burst into tears.

"Shishido…thank you." Said Choutarou.

"No problem, Choutarou." Said Shishido.

"All right, enough everyone." Said Atobe. "Let's calmly seek the whereabouts of these two that we need so we may go to the next Universe."

"For once, Atobe, you are the voice of reason." Said Inui.

"Hey." Said Atobe with a frown.

"You know, I think we're all just starting to get on each other's nerves." Said Eiji. "We need some time apart. Maybe it would be best if we waited another day before we found Kaidou and Kamio and stayed a night in this world. It's pretty normal and we can leave any time we want so there's no pressure. What do you say guys?"

He didn't receive any response whatsoever.

"Guys?" Eiji said.

Oshitari leaned forward with his hands outstretched for Eiji's head, his obvious plan being to, of course, snap Eiji's neck.

"EEK!" Eiji shrieked as he dove out of the way.

"Now, now." Said Taka, separating them. "There's no need for that."

"Did you hear what he just said?" Oshitari asked.

"Thank you for taking action before me." Said Fuji. "Because if I had taken action, the murder would have likely taken place."

"How reassuring!" said Eiji sarcastically. "I'll keep my mouth shut from now on, I guess!"

"YES." Said everyone.

"While I disagree with Eiji's declaration that we should stay another night, I do happen to agree with his other statement." Inui said.

"Which one?" Ryoma asked.

"You know, the one about how we're annoying each other." Inui replied. "Because, frankly, I am just tired of always having to explain everything to all of you."

"We're tired of listening to you." Shishido said truthfully.

"I just hope we find Renji soon so I have someone to talk to." Said Inui.

"I hope we find Renji soon too so I'm not the only one on Rikkai Dai anymore." Said Kirihara.

"Keep that in mind," Oshitari whispered to Atobe. "If we go to Renji's Universe next then we know he is in complete control of where we go."

"I heard that, you know." Said Inui.

"No you didn't." said Atobe.

"I'm standing like three feet in front of you." Inui pointed out.

"Whatever." Said Atobe.

"I'll have you know, I have no control over anything that's going on here at all and for you to think that I do not only flatters me but gives me false hope that maybe I will eventually figure out a way to control which Universe we hop to next." Inui stated.

"Whatever…can we just find Kaidou and Kamio now?" said Ryoma.

"Yes." Said Inui. "And I can think of no better way to do it right at this very moment than this."

Inui then got up on a chair, pulled out his shotgun and fired up into the air.

Everyone screamed and looked at him.

"Eiji." Inui said as he stepped off the chair.

Eiji nervously got up on the chair as everyone paid utter attention to him.

"Um…could uh…Kaidou and Kamio come over here?" Eiji asked.

There was a general "HUH?" and "WHAT?" from the crowd so Inui urged him to say it again.

"Let me try." Said Choutarou. "I have a supersonic yell that actually only works on Tuesdays."

Eiji stepped down and Choutarou stepped up. He yelled Kaidou and Kamio's names, which caused everyone to cover their ears and drop to the ground, writhing in pain and bleeding out the ears.

"We certainly are causing mass pandemonium in this Universe." Said Shishido.

THEY were all fine because Choutarou had raised a force field around them so they wouldn't be affected by his SUPER POWERS.

After a couple of minutes, Kaidou and Kamio stumbled forward.

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!" Kaidou yelled.

"Oh, that was my supersonic yell that only works on Tuesdays." Choutarou explained. "I'm sorry."

"WHAT?" said Kaidou. "I CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING. I'M BLEEDING OUT THE EARS."

"I'M SORRY!" Choutarou shouted, but not supersonically.

"WHAT?" said Kaidou and Kamio.

Luckily, at that exact moment, the quite large group of fourteen was suddenly engulfed with white light that would take them to a different place, where hopefully they wouldn't totally screw everything up.

When they landed, everyone was back in their regular clothes. Regular as in NOT regular.

"Oh, I can hear again…" said Kamio, putting his finger in his ear. And then he noticed he was wearing his green soccer uniform. "What's this?"

"YOU'RE complaining?" came the voices of others.

He looked up and nodded. "Okay…never mind."

"Where are we?" said Atobe. "All the colors are washed out and faded together."

"I think the more important question is…where's everyone else?" said Eiji.

They took a moment to count heads to discover that only seven people were present.

"Our group's been split in half!" said Momo. "And…Inui's not here! Goddamn!"

The people present were Kamio, Kirihara, Oishi, Choutarou, Atobe, Eiji and Momo. There was one person from each Universe, except for Kirihara and Ryoma who are practically a duo because they're NOT a duo. YAY!

"Now what do we do?" said Kirihara. "We don't have any idea where we are or what we have to do."

"I think we're being punished because Inui was saying how much he was tired of dealing with us." Oishi said sadly.

"It's all right, don't worry about it!" said Choutarou. "We'll figure something out!"

"Hey, why did we jump Universes anyway?" said Kamio. "I mean, I kind of figured it had something to do with Jounetsu exploding because they obviously had to forfeit…you guys didn't have anything to do with it, did you?"

"That's not important right now!" said Kirihara immediately as he looked in his vest to see that the stick of dynamite had returned and in his head he said, "SCORE!" Out loud he said, "What we have to do is find the other group!"

"If they're even here." Said Atobe. "It's likely Inui just took the remote and his favorites and left us here in this washed out Universe."

"I don't want to be stuck in a washed out Universe!" Eiji cried.

"Hey, what are you calling a washed out Universe?"

They whirled around to see a person with a hat on looking down while leaning up against a fence. He had long hair.

He started snapping his fingers and, slowly but surely, people started coming out of the woodwork (LITERALLY!) while all snapping their fingers. They were all dressed up as punks… but punks from the fifties. You know, that era.

"…Who are you?" said Oishi, slowly getting closer to the person who had first called to them.

"STOP!" called the group but NOT the one with the hat as they all put out their hands and then rolled forward in such a fashion that suggested it was choreographed. And it seemed even more choreographed when people started running by and doing somersaults and flips and cartwheels and jazz hands. And as the music started to pick up, as did the snapping.

Just when they were obviously about to break into some kind of crazy and ridiculous song, Atobe took a step forward and imposed his presence on the group. It caused them to freeze in place.

"Enough of that." Said Atobe. "Tell us who you are. You don't belong in this Universe."

"The name's Kizarasu." Said the one with the hat as he stepped forward and looked up. "Kizarasu Ryou."


	40. OMG

Channel 40- OMG

"Who?"

"Kizarasu Atsushi!"

Kaidou, Ryoma, Fuji, Shishido, Oshitari, Taka and Inui stood before a gang that was apparently led by Atsushi.

He stood before them with his hands on his hips as his groupies stood behind him all frozen in gangstah poses.

"Hang on a second, guys." Said Atsushi to his peeps. "I'll be back in a minute."

"GOT IT!" they all said together as they struck another gangster pose all at the very same.

Atsushi broke away from his gang.

"Let's walk." Atsushi said to the group of seven.

"Uh…sure." They said, eyeing the gang who still weren't moving. They turned and walked away.

"So…" said Atsushi once they were out of earshot of his gang. "What have you guys been doing for the past two weeks?"

"Hopping around to various Universes searching for people who were scattered around by my experiment." Inui answered. He held up the remote control, which now said 16. "Just a few more to go."

"Oh, that's interesting." Atsushi said.

"You?" Inui asked.

"Well…" Atsushi said slowly. "Singing, dancing, expressing our artistic creativity and authority through graffiti…"

He trailed off.

"Oh yeah." He said. "And preparing for the rumble tonight."

He pulled out a set of num-chucks from behind his back, swung them around and then posed.

Everyone stared at him.

"Wait, I can't figure out what Universe this is." Said Shishido, scratching his head.

"It appears to be some sort of Universe that…contains a gang… that… sing… and… dance…" said Inui very intelligently. Everyone patted him on the back for that one.

"Yes, it's a very musical place." Atsushi said as he put the num-chucks away. "At first, I was mostly turned off by it, but it starts to grow on you. If you guys have any requests then I'm sure I could get the gang together and we could work something out right on the spot."

"We're good." Said Fuji.

"Have you gone completely insane or something?" Oshitari questioned.

"Give him a break, he's been here for two weeks all by himself." Said Taka.

"Did you mention something about a 'rumble'?" Inui asked Atsushi.

"Yeah, my gang's rumbling another gang tonight." Atsushi said.

"Why?" said Kaidou. "What gang?"

"Well, I haven't actually seen this gang before." Atsushi admitted. "But apparently the Westies have been giving us, the Easties, huge trouble for years and we're finally going to rumble tonight establish dominance."

"Wait, so you're going to fight some people that you don't even know?" said Kaidou.

"I know I don't like them." Said Atsushi.

"You don't even know why you don't like them." Taka pointed out.

"That doesn't matter!" said Atsushi.

"Hm…I suppose we could call this place… Opposing… Musical…" Inui paused. "Gang… Universe…"

"Or make it an acronym." Said Ryoma. "O-M-G."

"OMG Universe." Said Inui with a nod. "That doesn't sound too bad."

"Why are we still caught up on that?" said Fuji. "Let's find everyone else so we can get our mission and then get out of here. Stupid OMG Universe."

"That's not necessary, Fuji." Said Taka with a frown.

"Fuji?" said Atsushi. "Hey, you're not related to Fuji Yuuta, are you?"

"HE'S related to ME." Fuji corrected as if it mattered. "Are you on St. Rudolph? You know my younger brother?"

"Yeah." Said Atsushi. And JUST when he was going to make a comment about not knowing that Yuuta had a sister that was so close to him in age, Inui decided to launch into an explanation about which Universe they had each came from.

"We are all from various Universes." Said Inui. "Fuji, for example is from the Girl Universe. In which he was turned into a girl since he is usually male."

"But you knew that." Said Fuji.

"Well actually—" Atsushi began, but Inui quickly followed up with more explanation.

"We just came from the Soccer Universe." He said. "That's where Kaidou came from."

"Hence, the soccer uniform." Kaidou said.

"I see." Said Atsushi. "I can pretty much guess the rest. Except for you." He pointed at Ryoma.

"Mary Sue." Ryoma mumbled.

"Oohhhh…" said Atsushi. "So what's this mission thing you were talking about earlier? Is that how we get out of here?"

"Once we receive everyone from each the Universe and we're all together, my remote dictates what we have to do in order to leave." Inui said. "Once we complete the mission, we all have to get together again and then we are taken to the next Universe."

"Where we do it all over again." Oshitari mumbled.

"It's a good time." Said Shishido. "But not really."

"Well, we're all here, aren't we?" said Atsushi. "I mean, no one else from our Universe is here."

"Well, that is irrelevant because we're still missing seven of our group." Taka said.

"Where are they?" Atsushi asked.

"No idea." Said Inui. "This has never happened before."

"What's never happened before?" Atsushi asked.

"We've never been split up when we entered a new Universe." Inui clarified.

"So let's find them." Said Atsushi. "I'll have my gang look all over Eastie territory."

"What about the rest of the area?" asked Ryoma.

"Well, we don't go into Westie territory…" Atsushi said. "I guess I could have them take a look over in the Southie area."

"What's in the South?" said Kaidou.

"That's where we're going to rumble." Said Atsushi. "It's essentially just an abandoned junk yard."

"Okay…and what about Northie?" Kaidou tried.

"Northie?" Atsushi said.

"Isn't there a Northie area?" Kaidou said. "I mean, there's Eastie, Westie, Southie… isn't there a Northie?"

Atsushi only stared at Kaidou as if what he was saying was the most ridiculous thing in the entire would even though it made perfectly valid sense.

"No." he said finally. "There isn't."

Meanwhile…

"_And that's why…"_

Ryou's entire gang flipped around and danced and snapped and various other things, putting on a grand show.

"_And that's why…"_

A couple of the gang members slid out in front and did jazz hands for Ryou as he stepped forth and adjusted his hat.

"And that's why we have to rumble tonight." He said.

The musical score ended, and the gang did jazz hands.

Ryou just stood there. They were all posing.

Kamio leaned over to Kirihara. "Are we supposed to clap or something?" he asked.

"Sure…why not?" said Kirihara as he started clapping, and pretty soon the others joined in.

"Thanks guys." Said Ryou, relaxing as the entire gang stood up and complimented each other on a good job of doing the 'And That's Why We Have to Rumble Tonight' song and dance.

"That was very interesting." Momo said finally since no one else was saying anything.

"Kind of makes me want to join a gang too." Said Eiji.

The entire gang stopped.

"WHAT?" they all yelled, but another musical score started in and they sounded more like they were chanting than yelling irrationally. "What's that you say? Say it again, speak up and say it again!"

"Oh no." said Atobe. "…Why me?"

"I want to join a gang!" Eiji exclaimed to the beat, taking a step forward, getting that twinkle in his eyes that suggested he was ready to join in on the song.

"Say it again!" the gang chanted, leaning over.

Ryou raised his hand and signaled for them to stop.

"Are you man enough?" he said. "Are you strong enough? Are you smart enough? Are you…" There was a dramatic drum beat perfectly in sync with his pause. "WESTIE enough? Because…"

The gang sparkled around and frolicked in circles, spinning like ballerinas and diving into somersaults.

Then, quite suddenly, they all came to a stop and posed, breaking into song simultaneously.

"_When you're a West, you're a West all the way from your first cigarette to your last dyin' day—"_

"STOP." Ordered Atobe quite loudly.

The record scratched and the entire group stopped in mid dance move and stared at Atobe.

"Atobe…that was so rude…" said Choutarou.

"I'm sorry." Said Atobe. "It's just that I already listened to them sing one song and I don't want to listen to them to sing another song."

"Besides, Eiji, there's no way you're going to join a gang!" said Momo, grabbing Eiji's arm and pulling him back. "You were a cheerleader in the Soccer Universe. Isn't that enough?"

"Soccer Universe?" said Ryou.

"Yeah." Said Atobe. "If you had let us explain what was going on instead of jumping around like pansies and singing songs then you wouldn't have to ask these questions."

"Don't mind him." Said Oishi. "He's just a little irritable. I'm sure once we get back to our original Universe, everything will be okay again."

"Wait." Said Ryou. "What? I know you guys?"

Everyone stared at him.

"What?" they all said.

"You guys know who I actually am?" Ryou asked. "The person I was for the first fourteen years of my life before I appeared here two weeks ago?"

"Well obviously!" said Eiji. "What did you think?"

"I thought you were newcomers." Ryou shrugged.

"You seriously didn't recognize us?" said Kirihara. "We knew who YOU were!"

"Sorry." Said Ryou. "Let's just forget about it. Is there a way for us to get back home?"

"Back to our original Universe?" said Atobe. "Yes. There is."

"How?" said Ryou.

"YES! HOW?" chanted the entire gang, trying to break back into song, but they were denied and forsaken by Ryou who commanded them all to leave so he could talk grown up things.

"Inui." Said Oishi. "He has the remote control that will fix everything and eventually bring us back home."

"Where is he?" said Ryou.

"I wish we knew." Oishi said sadly.

"I hope we find him soon." Said Ryou. "I sort of don't really want to rumble tonight because in the event that I die, I'll be very depressed."

"What if Inui's apart of the other gang?" Eiji gasped, throwing his hands over his mouth.

"Be quiet!" Said everyone else.

"In the meantime, we should stock up on weapons and think of a way to win to ensure that you don't die before we meet up with Inui and the counter goes down." Said Kirihara. "Cause I don't know if the counter will go down if you're dead, even if he is right close by."

"You guys know that I have no idea what you're talking about, right?" said Ryou.

"I'm mostly lost too." Kamio said.

"It's still sort of new to me." Oishi admitted.

"Well, whatever you just said, I know you mentioned something about weapons." Said Ryou, drawing a knife. (No, he didn't take out a piece of paper and draw a picture of a knife. He took one out of his pocket.) "What have you guys got?"

"Hey, I've got one too!" said Eiji, taking out his knife as well. "Yours is sharper and bigger, though."

"I've got a gun that never misses." Said Atobe, pulling out his gun.

"Yeah, never misses ME." Said Kirihara, lowering Atobe's arm. Then he looked at Ryou. "I've got guns that never hit. And a stick of dynamite. And this lasso I just found while you guys were singing. And I have this horse."

"What good are guns that never hit?" said Ryou as if Kirihara hadn't said anything else.

"I can't really do anything." Oishi admitted, looking at his racket and sighing helplessly.

"I'm really fast." Said Kamio.

"I've got this sword, and this telescope!" said Momo, but the only thing he showed Ryou was the telescope.

"I can't do anything really." Choutarou said.

"Ignore him." Said Atobe. "He's got super powers."

"Guys, it's a secret identity for a reason!" said Choutarou, sounding exasperated.

"Well, I think we've definitely got a step up above the Easties." Said Ryou. "With you guys on my side, I've got nothing to worry about. Thanks for joining my gang."

"Joining…your gang?" said Eiji as his eyes lit up.

"Of course!" said Ryou as the music for the reprise suddenly kicked in and his gang all ran over.

"_Here come the Westies, YEAH! And we're gonna beat every last buggin' gang on the whole buggin' street! On the whole! Ever! Mother! Lovin'! Street! YEAH!"_

Jazz haaaannnds…


	41. The Rumble

Channel 41- The Rumble

"So Jimmy the Rat looks at me and says, 'I'm not talking'," Oshitari explained as everyone sat around and listened. "And by this time I had had enough with his antics and dancing around the issue. So I just…"

He stopped talking, reached out and motioned snapping someone's neck.

"Only after getting the information I needed." Said Oshitari, leaning back confidently.

"Wow…" said the whole gang.

"You did that?" said Kaidou, looking slightly surprised and even a little disgusted. Maybe a tad impressed as well.

"Maybe we could try something out like that!" said one of the gang members to Atsushi.

"Maybe…" Atsushi said.

"Oh like we need more of that going on." Said Taka uneasily.

Just then, some more members of the gang came running over.

"Atsushi!" they yelled as they threw themselves before him.

He jumped to his feet. "What is it?" he asked.

"We just got back from Southie!" said one of them as he got up and took some deep breaths. He will be known as A-Rab. "We were searching for the guys you told us to look for… but some of the Westies were there!"

Everyone gasped and jumped to their feet.

"What were they doing there?" Atsushi demanded.

"I don't know." Said A-Rab. "We saw them and ran as fast as we could! I think they saw us."

"They're probably booby trapping the place." Said another gang member whose name was Big Johnny.

"Trying to get a leg up on us!" said the gang member whose name was Action.

"What are we going to do?" asked the gang member whose name was Benvolio.

"Listen up." Said Atsushi as he put his hand up in the air, and the rest of his gang leaned in and put their hands to their ears in an overly animated sign to show that they were listening. The musical score picked up.

They launched into a song about listening up and how they should worship Atsushi whenever he had something to say. After all, he only said LISTEN UP! when he really meant it.

When he was done and the music finally died on, he relaxed.

"So what's the plan?" asked the gang in complete harmony of one another.

"I speculate that—" Atsushi began, but Inui cleared his throat before he could continue.

Everyone looked at Inui.

"Yes?" said Atsushi.

"Is it safe to assume that perhaps the Westies were searching the South area for us?" Inui asked. "As in the seven of us?"

He gestured to himself and all those who were not apart of the gang.

"You consort with the Westies?" demanded Big Johnny.

"That's probably what they were doing." Said Fuji, totally ignoring Big Johnny and the rest of the gang. "I'm willing to bet that everyone else appeared in Westie territory, and whoever the leader is of that gang since THEIR gang members to Southie in order to find us."

"Why would he do something crazy like that?" said Atsushi.

"YOU did it." Shishido pointed out.

"Oh yeah." Said Atsushi. "Well, if everyone else is with the Westies, then they'll definitely be at the rumble tonight."

"We could meet up with them at the rumble and get the mission." Said Ryoma. "And then we can leave."

"AFTER the rumble." Said Benvolio.

"You're not apart of this conversation." Said Inui, giving Benvolio and the rest of the gang THE HAND.

"Hey." Said Atsushi. "You disrespect my gang and you're disrespecting me."

Inui blinked.

"All right." He said. "I'm okay with that."

"Oh." Said Atsushi. "In that case, whatever."

"Do you think you guys could hold off on the rumble until after we leave?" Taka asked. "I mean, that way…we won't have to… deal with it."

Taka shrugged but the gang let out a collective and angry NEVER!

And just when they were about to sing the, 'NEVER!' song, Atsushi stopped them.

"We'll find out soon enough." Said Atsushi. Then he pointed dramatically up at the sun to show everyone that it was dipping below the horizon. "The rumble starts when the sun is fully out of view…"

In the Western territory of this little Universe, a similar conversation was occurring.

"The rumble begins in only a few hours!" said Z-Bar, one of the members of the gang.

"It won't be long now." Said Little Jackie as he whipped a chain.

"I can't wait to show those Easties a thing or two!" announced Inaction, another member of the gang.

"We're takin' them OUT!" said Mercutio.

"I WOULD say that violence isn't the answer, but I don't want to be a hypocrite." Said Momo to Eiji.

"Why would that make you a hypocrite?" Eiji asked.

"Because we've pretty much used violence in every Universe we've come to and every time it's solved our problems." Momo replied.

"I don't think so." Said Eiji.

"Well let's think." Said Momo.

"You guys essentially killed everyone in an entire school in the Soccer Universe." Kamio said.

"We had a fight to the death with Sutefuani." Oishi said.

"We used violence to kill Dr. Brain." Choutarou added.

"We terrorized an entire town." Kirihara said with a nod.

"Our stay in the Detective Universe was rather violent as well." Atobe contributed.

"And Taka got in a duel in the Knight Universe." Momo finished up. "And ALL those violent acts eventually lead to us being able to move forward to the next Universe."

"So what are you trying to get at with this?" said Eiji, knowing he was beat.

"What I'm saying is that I wouldn't be surprised if our mission turned out to be that we had to kill everyone in the Eastie territory in order to jump Universes." Momo said.

"That is the WORST mission EVER!" said Eiji irrationally.

"If that's what it takes to jump Universes, as you guys say, then we have to do it." Said Ryou. "On that note, is everyone ready for the rumble?"

"YEAH!" cheered the entire gang.

They all started marching and singing and flipping and chanting and waving their weapons of mass destruction until they came to the Southie territory. And, just as the sun set, the Easties arrived.

Both gangs were shrouded by darkness.

Atsushi from the Eastie Territory was the first one to step forward.

"You Westies have terrorized us for the last time!" he announced. "It's time we put you in your place!"

"That's my line!" Ryou said, stepping forward as well.

The two of them paused for a few seconds as their eyes adjusted to the darkness. Then, slowly, they approached each other until they were only a few feet apart.

"Ryou?" said Atsushi.

"Atsushi?" said Ryou.

"Yeah." They both said together.

Inui suddenly appeared in between them with the remote. "Look, it's a fifteen now." He said, pointing at the screen. He stared at them both. "Seriously… how did you not know that you were both in this Universe?"

"We've been in separate places this whole time!" said Ryou.

"YOU'RE the head of the Westie gang?" Atsushi said, looking shocked.

"I can't believe you're the head of the Eastie gang!" Ryou said.

"Oh look, our mission has arrived." Inui commented as if the twins weren't having a reunion.

"We're going to have to rumble each other!" they both whined.

"Oh no you don't, just look." Said Inui, showing them the screen.

The twins leaned in and read the words out loud, "Stop the rumble and bring the two gangs together in harmony."

"HA!" came Eiji's enthralled voice. "Take that, Momo!"

"I was just speculating that it would be violent!" Momo retaliated.

"This shouldn't be too hard." Said Inui. "Just turn to your gangs and convince them that all the fighting is stupid and then we can get out of here. It certainly helps that the two of you are the heads of your gangs."

"Well, if it means we get home, I guess we can have a temporary truce." Said Atsushi, glaring at Ryou.

"For now, we'll have to act as though we like each other." Ryou said.

"Attention Easties and Westies alike!" said Atsushi, turning his back to Ryou and facing his gang. "We have been preparing for this rumble for at least two weeks, and for all I know, probably longer!"

"But when you think about the dire consequences of pointless fighting, you realize that it really is just pointless fighting with dire consequences." Said Ryou.

Inui was going to make a comment about how unconvincing their speech was so far, but upon looking around, they found that there was not a single dry eye in the entire Southie territory.

"So we ask," said Atsushi.

"We BEG!" Ryou added.

"That we all put our pasts behind us." Atsushi said.

"If we were all to become one big gang and command Soutie, Westie and Eastie as one…" Ryou said. "Then just think of all the different harmonies we could use and all the great choreography that could come out of it!"

Slowly, every member of each opposing gang stepped forth and agreed. And, as the musical score picked up, everyone started to notice that they were engulfed in white light so Inui pressed the button.

As everything started to become clear again, they found that they were all together, most thankfully.

"Well THAT must have been some kind of record." Said Eiji. "Actually, a lot of records, I think. We didn't kill anyone AND we got out of there really fast."

"I have to admit." Said Ryou. "I'm gonna miss the guys."

"The OMG Universe wasn't really that bad." Atsushi said.

"OMG?" said Ryou.

"Yeah." Atsushi replied. "That's what we named it. It's an acronym for Opposing Musical Gang Universe."

"That makes sense." Said Ryou.

"There is certainly getting to be a lot of us, isn't there?" Choutarou observed randomly because no one wanted to talk about the OMG Universe anymore. "How many do we have now?"

"Sixteen." Kirihara answered. "Which means that there's only fifteen left on the counter, right Inui?"

"Right." Said Inui.

"And you told me I could ask you the rate of how fast we're going after we reached fifteen." Kirihara said.

Inui was going to argue but then he recalled saying that.

"Fine." He said.

"So." Said Kirihara, crossing his arms. "What's the rate of which we're going?"

"Fourteen people in nearly fifteen days." Inui said. "With fifteen people remaining, it should take us about sixteen more days."

"Yes!" said everyone.

"Three days ago you told us it was going to take twenty-three more days." Atobe said, crossing his arms. "Are you sure your math is correct?"

"It's impossible to distinguish." Said Inui. "I'm just doing straight math. Some Universes require us to wait around for a certain day, and some Universes allow us to go out and do something right away, and the number of people varies every time as well. The factors are flawed, but my math is not."

Inui then looked very serious.

"So don't ever say it is." He said, sounding threatening.

"Wait, so what's the deal now?" said Ryou.

"Are we supposed to just wait around until someone runs up to us?" Atsushi questioned.

"How I wish it could be that easy." Shishido sighed.

"We must locate the people on our own." Inui said.

"Why doesn't that remote of yours have a tracking device in it?" Oishi asked.

"Oh I don't know." Said Inui. "Probably because I never thought to install a tracking devise in a television remote control."

It was impossible to see what was around them, but when the skies erupted into sudden thunder and lightning, they knew they had to seek shelter. So they ran to a nearby forest to get out of the rain.

If they had stayed a moment longer, they would have seen the lightning illuminate a giant castle off in the distance…


	42. The Castle

Channel 42- The Castle

When it was morning, everyone sat up at the same time.

"Did ANYBODY sleep?" said Kaidou, looking rather angry.

"It's still raining…" complained Oishi.

"At least it's not as dark." Said Inui, pulling out his remote and looking at it. "Nothing has changed in this department. We have to start looking for the people or person who is here."

"What if we're supposed to stay here?" said Ryoma. "Back in the Soccer Universe you guys just went off about how we need to stay wherever we appear because that's probably where we'll have to complete the mission or find the other people."

"Usually we appear NEAR where we have to be." Taka said.

"Besides," said Kamio, getting up and peering off in the distance. "There's a big castle off over there! I bet if we went there we'd find some people."

"I don't know." Said Oshitari. "Right now, I'm sort of feeling the Horror Movie Universe. You know, we go off to the scary castle when it's raining and we get kidnapped and experimented on by the crazy old scientist that lives there?"

"Yes, perhaps." Said Eiji. "But what if one of our pals is that crazy old scientist just WAITING for us to find him?"

"What you said just now Eiji…it was very smart." Said Inui.

"Thanks!" said Eiji.

So everyone started walking towards the castle.

Taka and Kirihara mounted their horses, glad that they were in a world that involved a castle so it wouldn't be too far fetched to have horses.

"Hey, hey, HEY!" said Kirihara as he pulled the reins to deter Forehand from drifting towards Horse.

Taka gently readjusted Horse as well, looking almost as rejected as his horse did.

"Ootori!" said Kirihara, and Choutarou immediately came running up.

"Yes?" he said, wanting to be helpful.

"Tell his horse to leave my horse alone." Said Kirihara. "And while you're at it, tell my horse that I don't approve of her girlish crush."

Choutarou looked torn.

"Would you really step in the way of true love?" Choutarou said, his eyes welding with tears.

"What?" said Kirihara. "True love? Between our HORSES?"

"He didn't mean it." Said Choutarou to Forehand as he stroked her mane.

"No, I DID mean it!" said Kirihara. "Tell them both to cut it out!"

"Why are you so opposed to their relationship?" said Taka. "I think it's cute."

"Yeah, I think it's cute too!" said Eiji.

Pretty soon, everyone was agreeing that it was quite cute. Even people like Shishido and Inui and Atobe…and Fuji. So it must have been cute.

"I don't care!" said Kirihara. "I don't approve of it!"

"Well I don't approve of your disapproval." Said Atobe as he whipped out his gun and pointed it at Kirihara as if he really HAD to.

Kirihara blinked a few times and looked around for some back up.

"It'll teach you a lesson, Kirihara." Said Oishi. "Even though I'd rather not have Atobe shoot you in the face, since you'll only temporarily die, I'm not all THAT opposed to it."

"You guys are willing to fake kill me over our horse's relationship?" Kirihara said in a tone of disbelief.

"Since it's only fake killing, yes." Oshitari said.

"Hang on…fake killing?" Atsushi said, and Ryou said pretty much the same thing only slightly different.

"Yes, everything resets as we jump to each Universe." Ryoma explained. "Everyone goes back to the clothes they were originally in and if anyone was injured or died at any point then they come back in the next Universe completely healed like nothing happened."

"So…" said Ryou slowly. "If you guys shot Kirihara right now, then he'd come back to life as if he wasn't shot in the next Universe?"

"Pretty much." Taka shrugged.

"Wow!" said Atsushi. "Can we see?"

"We'll kill him right before we're about to jump into the next Universe." Atobe said, putting his gun away.

"Oh, can I do it?" Fuji asked, raising his hand.

"Sure, why not?" said Atobe with a shrug. "It's not like I actually have anything against him."

"What?" said Kirihara. "I don't want that!"

"Too bad." Said Shishido. "You brought it on yourself."

"And you're the only one from your team." Kaidou added.

"Kamio's the only one from his team!" said Kirihara. "And the same with the twins! They're each the only ones from Rokkaku and St. Rudolph."

"Way to throw us under the bus." Said Kamio.

"It wouldn't make sense to kill either of THEM." Said Fuji. "They're the ones who want the demonstration."

"Do we have to kill anyone at all?" Eiji sighed.

"Listen everyone." Said Inui. "I've hardly said anything in this entire chapter and I have just made an observation so you all have to pay attention to me."

"Attention whore." Momo accused him.

"Maybe so." Said Inui. "But have any of you noticed the abundance of owls that have been flying overhead?"

Everyone looked up.

"You know, that's strange for the daytime." Said Oishi. "And for when it's raining like this. But it's not like I know anything about the common habits of owls."

"Was that your very important comment that you had to interrupt us to make?" Atobe asked. "Cause pretty much anyone could have noticed and commented about that if we had felt it was important enough to comment about."

"What?" said Inui. "It's not like you guys were talking about anything important."

"Only my LIFE!" said Kirihara.

"Like I said." Said Inui.

"I hate being hated…" Kirihara sniffed.

"Maybe you should strive to make yourself less hateable then." Fuji suggested.

"Guys…it just seems that no matter how much we walk, we never get any closer!" Eiji said, looking off at the castle.

"I've noticed that too." Said Shishido, looking at his watch. "Hey Choutarou. It's almost nine o'clock."

"Oh, so it is!" said Choutarou, looking at his watch as well. "How lucky!"

"What happens at nine o'clock?" asked Ryou.

"From the hours of nine o'clock to ten o'clock AM and PM I can use my teleportation power." Said Choutarou. "But it's only for those two hours out of the day."

"Well then WHY are we walking?" said Oshitari.

"Because I forgot about it." Choutarou admitted. "But luckily Shishido remembered!"

So they all waited around for a few minutes before it was FINALLY nine o'clock.

"All right, will you be able to teleport all sixteen of us to the castle?" asked Inui.

"I've never teleported more than just a few people…" Choutarou admitted. "But I've also never had any trouble before. We all just have to hold hands and stand in a circle."

They all blinked and stared at him.

"Why?" Ryoma asked finally.

"Because it's easier that way!" said Shishido. "Choutarou has to be in contact with everyone who he's teleporting, and it works if we're in contact with each other! So if we just make a circle then it'll work out!"

"Maybe we can just walk." Said Kirihara.

"Everyone just shut up and make a circle!" said Shishido, sounding annoyed. "It'll only be for a minute at the most!"

"It won't be that bad!" said Eiji as he grabbed Oishi's hand. "Just hold the hand of someone that you don't hate!"

"You guys were all JUST plotting my death." Kirihara pointed out.

"Then you get last pick." Eiji said as if that was a sufficient solution.

Everyone reluctantly grasped each other's hands, and Choutarou wedged himself in between Shishido and Oshitari.

"All right, I'll just take us outside the castle." Said Choutarou.

"Okay. Just do it." Said everyone.

"Cause it would be awkward if we suddenly appeared inside and there were people there!" Choutarou laughed.

"Hurry up…"

"Then again…what if there's someone OUTSIDE the castle…" Choutarou said, looking perplexed.

"JUST GO!" yelled everyone irritably because they didn't want to be holding hands with each other anymore.

"Don't yell at Choutarou!" said Shishido. "He's about to do you all a favor!"

"It's okay, Shishido." Said Choutarou. "Maybe they were right…"

"They don't have a right to be so rude to you when you're doing something for their benefit!" said Shishido passionately.

"Are we going to hang around and talk for a long time or something?" said Kaidou. "Because if we are, I want to let go of the hands I'm holding."

He glared at Momo, and then turned his head and glared at Inui.

"We're going now!" said Choutarou. "Hold on tight, everyone!"

"Do we have to?" came the general response from EVERYONE.

So then Choutarou did his super teleporting move that only works between the hours of nine o'clock and ten o'clock. They were surrounded by bright rainbow lights that soared down from the heavens, and suddenly they became totally transparent. Then the next thing they knew, they were standing in front of the castle that had once been so far away.

No one wanted to tell Choutarou how queer his teleportation process was because they were rather thankful for it, so they kept their mouths shut for once.

"This castle is a whole lot bigger than I thought it was." Said Atobe.

"Do you think whoever built it was compensating for something?" said Momo as he started chuckling like a moron.

"Please." Said Ryou. "Don't. That reminded me of David." He put his head in his hand. "That has been one of the upsides of being in a different Universe. Being away from HIM."

"How hilarious would it be if it turned out that he was in this Universe?" said Momo.

"Not hilarious at all." Said Ryou.

"The chances of that are improbable." Said Inui. "After all, there's only fifteen more people to find and, while we've located almost the entirety of Seigaku, most of the teams are still fractured."

"And?" said Kaidou.

"That means that not everyone from every team was affected." Said Inui as if that was obviously what his point was leading into. "If there's an average of eight players per team, then it just doesn't add up. Do you see?"

"WHATEVER INUI." Said everyone.

They decided that now was a good time to take another look at the castle.

"So what now?" said Taka, glancing at the giant door that stood before them. "Do we knock?"

"Why not?" said Shishido as he reached out to knock, but suddenly the doors began to swing open.

There was an assortment of people of all sizes standing before them with yellow colored robes on. They were holding broomsticks.

"Whoa." Said both parties at the same time as they took a gander at each other.

The majority of the yellow clad folk sidestepped around the main characters and ran away. The group watched them leave and then faced forward again to see a pair of faces that they didn't expect to find right away.

"Only thirteen more to go now." Inui said, watching the number on his remote change.

"Shinji!" exclaimed Kamio.

"And Hiyoshi!" exclaimed all of Hyoutei.

"Hi guys." Said Shinji and Hiyoshi.


	43. The Sorting

Channel 43- The Sorting

"It's some kind of strange…wizard world." Hiyoshi explained. "It's some kind of school where we're learning how to be wizards."

"And everything that happens seems to revolve around this one boy named Harry Potter." Shinji said.

They all stared at them.

"Do you guys have to talk like that?" said Atobe.

"Talk like what?" they both said in unison.

"You know, with those accents." Atobe said.

"Accents?" they repeated.

"You two are talking with accents." Atobe said. He looked at the others. "They are, aren't they? Or am I going insane?"

"They are." The others assured him.

"Well whatever!" said Hiyoshi. "Let's complete whatever stupid mission we have to complete so we can leave!"

"Why, you two don't like it here?" Kamio said sarcastically.

"Not really." Said Shinji. "That much should have been obvious. Asking a question like that is just wasting your time and my time."

"Okay, okay." Said Kamio. "Fine."

They all looked at Inui.

"WHAT." He said in that tone that was, "Why are you judging me?"

"The mission?" Shishido commanded.

"Staring at me isn't going to make the mission appear any sooner." Said Inui.

"Why isn't the mission appearing?" said Oishi. "We're all here, aren't we?"

Inui shrugged, which was never a good sign.

"There isn't anyone else from our original Universe in this one besides you two guys?" Momo asked.

"If there is, he's done a pretty good job pretending as though he belongs here." Said Hiyoshi.

"Everyone relax." Inui said. "The mission is coming."

They all crowded around the remote but Inui decided he was going to put his foot down and he turned away from them all to read it out loud.

"Win Qu…" he started. "Qu…Qui…"

He frowned at the screen.

"Well, I can't even pronounce this thing, let alone win at it." Inui reported. "Looks like we're out of luck if we don't even know what it is."

"Let me see." Said Hiyoshi.

Inui showed him the screen.

"Quiddich." Hiyoshi clarified. "It's the popular game at this wizard school."

"So it's a game?" Taka said. "Do we have a chance to win it?"

"Not likely." Said Shinji. "We never win."

"Of course." Said Atobe.

"I bet if we had a good coach like Tachibana to get us to play as a team then we'd be able to win." Said Shinji.

"What is this game all about?" Kirihara said. "How do you play?"

"We were actually on our way to practice right now." Hiyoshi said. "The rest of our team is probably wondering where we are. You guys can come and watch if you want."

"All right." Everyone agreed.

They were just about to start walking towards the Quiddich Arena when they were promptly stopped by the sound of a throat clearing.

Upon turning around, they discovered an elder man standing behind them.

"Professor Dumbledore!" said Shinji and Hiyoshi at the same time.

Professor Dumbledore just nodded. "Why don't you two introduce me to your large group of friends?" he suggested. Then he lowered his voice. "You are all not part of this Universe, are you?"

All at once they tried to explain, some lying and some telling the truth, but Professor Dumbledore just stood there with the same contented smile on his face as when he had first arrived. Slowly, everyone's ramblings trailed off as they waited for him to say something.

"Okay." He said. "Why don't you two head to Quiddich practice and I'll take all these gentlemen and the two ladies to my office to find something to do about them."

"Well, sir, if you're aware enough that we're not from this Universe then I feel like you have the privilege to know that we're not actually girls." Said Oishi, raising his hand and pointing to Fuji who looked like he was going to kill whatever spoke to him first.

"Um. Whatever." Said Professor Dumbledore as he gestured for Shinji and Hiyoshi to run along. Inui assured them it was all right, since they needed to practice in order to complete the mission anyway.

Dumbledore lead the massive group to his office.

"So," he said. "Will one of you please explain the situation to me?"

Before anyone else could start like last time, Inui stepped forward.

"I will." He said.

And then he launched into the LONG VERSION of an explanation as Professor Dumbledore just stood there nodding and listening. He finished up with explaining their current mission and when he finished, he stepped back into the group and waited.

"Well," Professor Dumbledore said finally. "This sort of thing has never happened before. These are obviously extreme circumstances, so I am going to make an extreme decision. How many of you are there right now?"

"Sixteen." Said Inui. "If we included Hiyoshi and Shinji, then eighteen."

"I have decided." Professor Dumbledore. "Until Hufflepuff successfully wins a Quiddich match, I will allow you all to stay at Hogwarts."

His only response was a few blinks.

"Sorry?" Inui said. He knew that if he didn't understand it, then Professor Dumbledore must have said something REALLY complicated and therefore the others must have been so very confused. "Could you use smaller words?"

"Hufflepuff is the house that your two friends are apart of." Professor Dumbledore replied. "You said their mission was to win at Quiddich. So Hufflepuff must win Quiddich for you to leave. Until that day comes, I will allow you all to stay here at the school, which is called Hogwarts."

"Ooohhhh…" said everyone, nodding slowly.

"Thank you so much for your hospitality!" said Choutarou.

"Where will we be staying?" Atobe said immediately. "We haven't gotten much sleep recently, and I believe I speak for everyone when I say I'm ready for bed."

The others agreed.

Professor Dumbledore went to his shelves and pulled an old hat off. "First you must be sorted." He said. "This will decide where you stay."

"Huh?" said everyone in a slightly whiny fashion.

"There are four Houses here at Hogwarts." Said Dumbledore. "Hufflepuff, Slytherin, Ravenclaw and Gryffindor. The hat will decide where you are most suited and then you are permitted to go there after receiving your robes and class schedule."

"Class schedule?" said Atsushi, sounding appalled.

"Yeah!" Ryou finished up. "We don't want to attend the school. We just want someplace to sleep!"

"It will be less conspicuous." Said Dumbledore. "As it is, we have been having a lot of trouble this year with certain evil forces wreaking havoc throughout the school. We've actually had this type of trouble every year now that I think about it…but this is the only way to keep the students from being alarmed."

"Guys, he IS giving us a place to stay." Eiji reminded them.

Reluctantly, everyone eventually agreed. But they only agreed that they'd sort of half-ass the job, and that seemed good enough for Dumbledore.

"Who will be first to be sorted?" said Dumbledore, gesturing towards the seat that he had set up while apparently no one was looking.

"Let's just go in order." Said Inui as he went first.

"What order?" said Momo.

"The order in which I found everyone." Said Inui as if that much should have been obvious.

"Inui, we definitely found everyone TOGETHER." Said Momo.

"But I was first." Said Inui as he sat down.

Dumbledore put the hat on Inui's head and, after only a few seconds passed, the hat suddenly yelled, "RAVENCLAW!"

They were all taken aback by the talking hat, but when they figured in comparison to other things they had seen so far, they decided it wasn't THAT weird.

"Here are your robes." Said Dumbledore because he keeps large stacks of extra robes handy just in case. "This is a wand, but it's a fake wand so it won't actually do any magic, which shouldn't be a problem since none of you are magical anyway. This is a schedule with minimal classes just so it is apparent to other students that you actually are going to class as opposed to wandering around all day."

"All right." Said Inui as he took his bundle of items from Dumbledore.

"So, according to Inui, I'm next." Said Momo, stepping forward.

"GRYFFINDOR!" said the hat, and Dumbledore handed Momo a stack of things as well.

"We're already getting split up." Momo looked a little depressed.

"Well, there's four houses." Said Taka as he went to the seat. "It's bound to happen, isn't it?"

"GRYFFINDOR!" said the hat.

"YES!" said Momo. "I'm not alone!"

Taka took his stuff and stood next to Momo as Eiji went over to the chair.

It took a long time before the hat finally shouted, "HUFFLEPUFF!"

"Hufflepuff…?" Eiji looked slightly disappointed as he received his new things as well.

"It's my turn, I suppose." Atobe established as he sat down in the chair and, before the hat even touched his head, it shouted,

"SLYTHERIN!"

"Interesting." Said Dumbledore as he gave Atobe his things.

"Now there's at least one person in every House." Said Oshitari as he took a seat.

The hat pondered a bit, and then said, "RAVENCLAW!"

Next up came Kirihara.

"Watch it turn out that there's a secret FIFTH house that no one knew about and I'll end up there." Said Kirihara pathetically as he sat down.

The hat shouted, "SLYTHERIN!"

"Well that's a relief." Kirihara sighed.

"You go first, Shishido!" Choutarou offered.

"All right." Said Shishido as he took a seat.

The hat took a long while before it finally said, "SLYTHERIN!"

"Come and join the best house of them all." Atobe said as he welcomed Shishido into Slytherin.

"I hope I'm in Slytherin too…" said Choutarou, looking longingly at the Slytherin group.

Dumbledore rolled his eyes as he easily foresaw that not really happening.

The hat said, "HUFFLEPUFF!"

"Aww…" said Choutarou sadly, and Shishido shook his fist angrily at the hat on the inside. But he didn't show it.

"I get a friend!" Eiji cheered.

"You're up now, Fuji." Said Oishi.

"SLYTHERIN!" screamed that hat before Fuji even reacted to Oishi's comment.

Everyone looked at the hat.

"Was that my assignment?" Fuji asked Dumbledore.

"It must be." Said Dumbledore, not making eye contact with Fuji because he had never seen the hat make its decision before the student had even sat down, so he established that Fuji must have been the very embodiment of evil and therefore should not look at him.

"Well, all right then." Fuji shrugged as he took his things from Dumbledore and stood with his other Slytherin pals.

"Now you, Oishi!" said Eiji. "Get into Hufflepuff, okay?"

"We'll see, Eiji." Said Oishi as he sat down and Dumbledore put the hat on him.

After a short pause, the hat finally said, "GRYFFINDOR!"

"NOOOOOOOOOO!" Eiji shrieked, dropping to his knees. Choutarou jumped in surprise and stepped away from him.

"It's all right, Eiji!" Oishi assured him. "We'll still see each other."

"Could the hat have made a mistake?" Eiji pleaded, running over to Dumbledore.

"No." said Dumbledore. "It has NEVER made a mistake."

"It's not fair…" said Eiji. "It has to have made a mistake if it split me and Oishi up."

"Enough of the drama." Said Ryoma as he stepped forward to sit down but he tripped over the seat and fell to the ground in a heap. Instead of helping him, everyone just laughed as he grumbled and sat back up. He climbed up onto the stool but the leg broke from underneath him and he once again fell over. Again, everyone laughed at him. Even Dumbledore couldn't help but chuckle warmly.

So now that the stool was broken, Ryoma sat on the floor and Dumbledore put the hat on his head.

"GRYFFINDOR!" said the hat.

"I don't get Ryoma on my team either?" Eiji gasped as Ryoma took his things and went to where Oishi, Taka and Momo were.

"Kaidou and Kamio." Inui said, trying to hurry things along.

Kaidou went first, and the hat quickly established, "SLYTHERIN!"

Then Kamio stepped up and the hat took a little longer before it finally to said, "HUFFLEPUFF!"

"And only you two remain." Said Dumbledore, pointing at the twins.

They glared at each other and then both moved towards the hat at the same time. Their glare hardened, and just as they were going to get all OMG on each other, Dumbledore just walked over and put the hat on the closest person to him, which happened to be Atsushi, and the hat chimed, "RAVENCLAW!"

"Hey!" said Atsushi, looking up as Dumbledore took the hat off of him, walked around him and then put it down on Ryou.

The hat once again spouted out, "RAVENCLAW!"

"We're BOTH in Ravenclaw?" they yelled at each other.

"There." Said Dumbledore. "The sorting is complete. In the pile I have given each of you, you will also find a map to get to your dormitories and the password to get into the dormitories. These passwords and locations are secrets that you can't even share with each other, unless you are part of the same house."

He led them out of his office.

"That is all." Dumbledore said. "I wish you all the best of luck in completing your search for your friends and making it back to your original Universe."

With that, Dumbledore was gone, leaving everyone silently peering down the hallways.


	44. Cheaters Prosper

Channel 44- Cheaters Prosper

"I wonder what the difference between the four houses is." Taka said to his three fellow Gryffindor pals as they entered the Gryffindor common room to find it remotely empty.

"Well, everyone in this house happens to be on Seigaku." Momo noted. "But that could just be a coincidence."

"Our dormitories should be up the stairs and to the left." Oishi said, looking at his directions.

"My paper says it's upstairs and to the right." Ryoma said.

"So does mine." Said Taka.

"Me too." Said Momo. "Maybe yours is a typo."

"Maybe." Oishi said.

They all went up the stairs and were JUST about to turn right when two girls emerged from the doors on the left, looked everyone up and down, then giggled and departed.

"Oh I get it." Said Momo. "The doors on the right are for the boys and the doors on the left are for the girls."

They all nodded at each other except for Oishi who was angrily crumpling his paper in his enclosed fist.

"We TOLD him we were actually male." Oishi said, trying to stay calm but he was turning noticeably red.

"You could probably just come in here anyway." Taka said, pointing at the door to the boy's dorm.

"Probably not." Said Ryoma. "There's going to be other boys in there wondering why there's a girl."

"It's all right." Said Oishi, taking a few deep breaths. "I'll just…go in here."

"You sure?" said Taka, looking concerned.

"Quite sure." breathed Oishi through clenched teeth. "It's perfectly fine. It's only for a little while. Hopefully we'll be leaving soon."

"That's the spirit!" said Momo, patting Oishi on the back.

Oishi looked less than spirited as he pushed through the door on the left and disappeared.

The three of the male variety looked at each other and gave sighs of relief.

"Well that could have gone worse." Momo said, trying to look on the bright side.

"Let's hurry up." said Ryoma. "I'm tired."

With that, the three of them went through the door on the right.

Meanwhile…

"OF course!" said Kirihara as he and the other Slytherins stayed a moment in the common room. "Of COURSE!"

"WHAT?" said Atobe, Shishido, Fuji and Kaidou since they were tired of listening to him.

"Look." He said. "TWO Seigaku… TWO Hyoutei. Then me. ONE. I'm alone. AGAIN."

"Do you have some kind of horrible fear of being alone?" Shishido questioned. "Because it feels like a complex to me."

"Be quiet." Said Kirihara, crossing his arms and pouting. "Where's my horse? I want my horse."

"I wonder if there was any rhyme or reason to how that hat split us up." said Atobe, looking thoughtful. "I happened to notice that the hat never hesitated when placing any of us in Slytherin. It seemed to consider each option before placing the others."

They all looked at each other.

Kaidou let out a low hiss.

"Well, I can't imagine." Fuji said. "But it seemed fairly confident in its decisions."

The five of them stared at each other.

"Well, how about we get some sleep?" Atobe suggested, standing up.

"I'm all for that." Shishido agreed.

"I'm going to stay up a little while longer." Fuji said, relaxing in his large comfy armchair.

"Meaning…you're going to be coming up to the dormitories when we're already sleeping?" Kirihara questioned. "When we're totally defenseless?"

Fuji nodded.

"Don't worry, though." Said Fuji. "You won't be awakened."

"That's now what I'm worried about." Kirihara admitted.

"No, because I'm in the girl's dormitory anyway." Fuji said.

"So you won't be coming into our room while we're sleeping?" Kirihara clarified.

"Well, I'm not SUPPOSED to." Said Fuji, folding his hands.

"Is that a yes or a no?" said Kaidou, looking confused.

"Probably not." Said Fuji.

"I feel so NOT reassured…" Kirihara muttered.

Meanwhile…

"I feel like we're just leftovers on the leftover team that didn't have as many people on it as every other team." Said Ryou as everyone got in their beds. There were two sets of bunk beds in their room, and the twins had both claimed the top bunk, so everything worked out all right thankfully.

"I kind of got that vibe too." Atsushi admitted.

"Well of course." Said Inui. "You would think that was true if you didn't notice the pattern."

He sat up a little bit.

"Don't tell me you didn't notice the pattern." He said.

"I noticed the pattern." Said Oshitari but it might very well have been a lie.

"What was the pattern?" Ryou asked.

"If you didn't even notice the slightest of patterns then I'm not going to waste my breath explaining it to you." Said Inui. "Clearly you are both too simple minded to comprehend such a complex pattern."

"Even though it's not that complex." Oshitari pointed out.

"You be quiet too." Said Inui. "You didn't notice the pattern."

"What gave me away?" said Oshitari.

"The fact that you're not ME." Inui answered smugly.

"Aha." Said Oshitari. "Well? What's the pattern?"

"What pattern?" Inui said.

"You know!" said Atsushi. "The pattern in which we were all split up! Like, why are WE in Ravenclaw and why is everyone else in whatever place they ended up in?"

"It's not important." Said Inui.

"Now I'm not going to be able to get to sleep because I'll be trying to figure out the pattern." Ryou whined.

"There is no pattern, is there?" Oshitari inferred.

"Of course there's a pattern." Said Inui.

"Then why aren't you sharing it with us?" said Oshitari.

"I already told you." Inui reminded him.

"I don't find that to be a sufficient answer." Oshitari said.

"Well too bad." Said Inui as he rolled over and faced the wall. "Now leave me alone."

"Not until you tell us the pattern!" Atsushi said.

"Fine." Said Inui. "Alphabetical order."

"Oh!" said the other three as they lied down and were just about to go to sleep when they realized that… no. It wasn't alphabetical order.

Meanwhile…

"HUFFLEPUFF!" Eiji exclaimed. "What? That's so random! Why couldn't I be in Gryffindor with Oishi?"

"I think you should stop complaining about it." Said Kamio. "I'm sure Ootori wanted to be in the same group as Shishido but you don't hear him whining about it endlessly."

They both looked over at Choutarou who was sitting there with this face that obviously told everyone that he was thinking, "Strong Choutarou! Strong Choutarou! BREATHE!"

"I don't know about you guys, but I want to go to sleep." Kamio said. "I don't think I've slept ever since all of you came into the Soccer Universe."

"Excuse us for saving you!" said Eiji, sounding offended.

Just then, the door to the Hufflepuff Common Room swung open. (No one really knows what the Hufflepuff Common Room looks like or if it even really exists. All we can do is hope that they even have a common room and don't have to huddle together for warmth outside the building.)

In strolled Hiyoshi and Shinji looking tired and dirty from their practice.

"What are you three doing here?" said Hiyoshi. "We were sure that Professor Dumbledore was going to kick you out."

"He did quite the opposite." Kamio said. "He listened patiently to our situation and sorted us into houses."

"He's letting us stay until you guys win a game of Quiddich!" Choutarou said.

"Oh." Said Shinji and Hiyoshi.

"What?" said Eiji, putting his hands on his hips. "Are you guys NOT excited about that?"

"No, we are." Said Shinji. "We just have a hard time showing it."

"That's for sure." Frowned Eiji.

"We are also plagued with a horrible piece of knowledge." Hiyoshi added, sitting down and looking helpless.

"What is it?" said Choutarou, looking concerned.

"Our team has practically no scoring ability." Hiyoshi said. "Shinji and I can only do so much as the Beaters, and our Keeper does the best he can. Our Chasers are awful. And our best player, our Seeker, had to rush home for a family emergency and probably won't be back until after Christmas break."

"We have no idea what you're saying, but go ahead." Said Choutarou pleasantly and supportively.

"So what we're saying is that there's no way we're going to win any upcoming games." Shinji said. "With our Seeker missing, we'll have virtually no offense whatsoever."

"We're holding tryouts for the new Seeker as we speak, but none of the candidates looked promising." Hiyoshi reported.

"What does it take to be a Seeker?" Kamio asked.

"Well, you have to be able to fly around on a broom at high speeds and catch a tiny gold ball that's flying around trying to evade everyone." Hiyoshi said.

"Aw man." Said Eiji. "It would be great if one of us could do it, but none of us are magical so we can't fly on brooms."

"Yeah." Said Choutarou. "I mean, I could fly WITHOUT a broom, but flying with a broom would be like… whoa. No way! WHAT a disaster."

Choutarou chuckled foolishly as everyone stared at him.

"You can fly?" said Shinji with a raised eyebrow.

"Ootori came from Superhero Universe!" said Eiji. "He can do it all! Go flight, speed, super strength… and I'm willing to bet you have super VISION too!"

"Yeah, so?" said Choutarou.

"Ootori, that's it!" said Hiyoshi, standing up.

"What's it?" said Choutarou.

"YOU could be our new Seeker." Hiyoshi decided.

"ME?" said Choutarou.

"Yeah!" said Eiji. "It's perfect! We could definitely win if we CHEAT!"

"Quick, to the Quiddich fields!" said Hiyoshi.

"Wait." Said Shinji. "You should change your clothes first. All three of you."

"Good call." Said Hiyoshi.

"I'm a little nervous." Said Choutarou. "I don't want to be on the Quiddich team! I didn't even know what Quiddich was prior to one minute ago, and I had never even heard of it prior to an hour ago!"

"You'll be fine!" Kamio assured him.

"Yeah!" said Eiji. "You've done well in everything else we've forcibly thrown you into without thinking it through ahead of time!"

"Well…I suppose…" Choutarou sighed, but he still looked reluctant.

"We have to hurry down before our captain picks someone who's not as good." Hiyoshi said.

So after they all changed their clothes, they hurried down to the Quiddich fields where they could try out.


	45. Good News

Channel 45- Good News

"That was brilliant…just brilliant." Said Hiyoshi as Hufflepuff sat around their table for dinner. They were all so excited about Choutarou since essentially the entire house had been down at the fields for the tryouts.

"How old are you?" said the captain, the Keeper on the team.

"Um…thirteen." Choutarou answered, looking a little nervous as everyone sat around him.

"I can't believe this is your third year here and you're only now trying out for Quiddich!" said the captain.

"…Third year?" Choutarou said hesitantly.

Just then, the Slytherins came into the dining hall and noticed that all the Hufflepuffs were gathered at one part of their table.

"What do you suppose is going on over there?" Atobe said, curious only because people seemed to think that it was more interesting than he was, since no one had noticed him entering.

"Out of my way!" came a voice behind them as Malfoy plowed right through the middle of their group of five.

The group was broken up and Kirihara even almost fell over. When they regained composure, they watched as Malfoy and his flunkies trudged by and took their seats at the table.

"That little—" Kaidou started advancing towards him, but Fuji put his hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"Wait." Fuji said.

"What?" demanded Kaidou. "Why?"

"It's not time yet." Fuji answered.

"Fine…" Kaidou stepped down.

Fuji nodded, took a deep breath and then began to advance towards Malfoy himself.

"He just wanted to do it himself!" Shishido said as the four others lunged out to keep Fuji from going any further.

In the Hufflepuff group, Choutarou's Shishido Senses started tingling.

He stood up and waved to Shishido. "Hi Shishido!" he exclaimed, which caused all the Hufflepuffs to turn to see who Choutarou was waving to.

The Slytherins looked over.

"It seems as though Ootori is the center of attention." Atobe crossed his arms and looked slightly jealous.

Just then, some random kid walked up to Atobe.

"Why are you gray?" asked the kid.

Atobe didn't even answer the kid, he just backhanded him across the room.

In the lull, Choutarou had gotten up and went over to the Slytherins.

"What's going on over there, Choutarou?" Shishido asked.

"Well, I joined the Quiddich team to help us win." Choutarou said. "And apparently everyone is really excited about it! They think we have a chance this time around!"

"Remind me again what Quiddich is?" Kirihara requested.

"Oh I don't really know." Choutarou said. "All they did was tell me what I have to do. I have to fly around and catch a little gold ball and that's it!"

"Well of course. Anyone could do that." Said Kaidou.

"Anyone who could FLY." Fuji pointed out.

"Oh right." Said Kaidou.

Just then, Inui appeared behind the Slytherins, followed by Oshitari, Atsushi and Ryou.

"I hope you all slept well." Inui said as he held up a piece of paper. "I discovered the Quiddich schedule. Hufflepuff's next game is the day after tomorrow and it is against Gryffindor. I also discovered the team rosters. Are you a last minute addition to the Hufflepuff Team, Ootori?"

"I am!" said Choutarou. "I just made the team."

"I see." Said Inui. "Then perhaps my drastic measures won't be necessary." He crumbled up the Gryffindor Team Roster and threw it behind him.

"Oh good." Said Ryou.

"I was not looking forward to Inui's drastic measures." Atsushi said.

"Whatever." Said Oshitari with a shrug.

"I don't even want to know." Said Kaidou.

"Would it have involved blowing up another school?" Kirihara asked.

"Hm…maybe for you." Inui replied. "But, as I said, they are no longer necessary."

"I'm glad you all have so much confidence in me!" said Choutarou gleefully.

"It is unfortunate that we have to wait until the day after tomorrow, however." Inui said.

"For what?" came Taka's voice as he came out of nowhere with his fellow Gryffindors; Oishi, Momo and Ryoma.

"The next Hufflepuff game." Inui replied.

"Do you think maybe they could have a scrimmage or something that would count?" Momo tried.

"I doubt it, Momo." Said Oishi. "It has to be more official than that."

"Let's just do whatever we have to do to get out of here." Ryoma said.

"Nice contribution to the conversation, Ryoma." Said Momo.

"Whatever." Said Ryoma.

"HEY HEY!" yelled Eiji from the Hufflepuff group as he suddenly noticed that everyone else was standing around. He gesture for Kamio, Shinji and Hiyoshi to follow him and THEY DID! "You guys should have seen Ootori. He did an awesome job pretending as though he needed a broom to fly. The only reason I wasn't fooled was because I knew he could fly without one!"

"Stop, I wasn't THAT good!" said Choutarou, looking embarrassed.

"I'm sure you were awesome, Choutarou." Said Shishido.

"You really think so?" said Choutarou, beaming.

"What?" said Eiji. "I was there. I said it. Why is that you only believe Shishido… he wasn't even there…"

"Don't even try to tread in that territory." Hiyoshi warned Eiji.

Kamio and Shinji turned to each other and telepathically came the mutual agreement that they missed Tachibana a whole lot.

At that point, the appointed Houses were forsaken, and everyone split up according to their teams in order to talk some more strategy.

"The next Hufflepuff game is on Saturday." Inui told his team. "Hopefully, with Ootori on the team, they'll be able to win that one. If not, the next game for them is on Wednesday. If they lose the game on Saturday, we'll have to go back to my drastic measures."

"I hate drastic measures!" cried Eiji.

"I know, I know." Said Inui. "Some may think my drastic measures are a bit over the top, but that's why I call them drastic measures."

"I don't know, Inui." Said Fuji. "I think your drastic measures are necessary when the situation is dire."

"Thank you, Fuji." Said Inui. "Though I don't know what that means coming from someone like you."

"I'll take that as a compliment." Fuji decided.

"If you're talking about repeating our performance like in the Soccer Universe then no way." Said Oishi. "Even though what happens in this alternate Universes are completely inconsequential to us doesn't meant that it doesn't directly affect the hundreds of people who actually reside there."

"We tend to wreak havoc a lot." Momo noted.

"Yeah, definitely from what I've seen so far." Ryoma said as he went to take a drink of water but missed his mouth and got it all over his shirt. "Aw man…"

"Maybe Oishi's right." Said Taka. "From now on we should try to be more considerate of the people who actually live in the Universes."

"I wonder if this sort of thing has ever happened before and people from other Universes have blown through ours and totally destroyed something or other." Kaidou said.

Everyone stared at him.

"The likelihood of that is next to zero percent." Inui said, adjusting his glasses.

This made everyone look up towards his eye area.

"Inui, can't we see what's under that patch?" Eiji begged.

"No." said Inui.

"Then could you look under it and then tell us what's there?" Eiji tried.

"No." Inui repeated.

"Aww…" said everyone.

Across the room, Hyoutei was chilling like ice cream filling.

"And then we went to a Universe in which there was this… GIRL." Atobe was explaining to Hiyoshi since he was the new kid on the block since they hadn't gotten another Hyoutei person since Shishido and Choutarou.

When Atobe didn't continue because he looked too disgusted, Hiyoshi looked to his other teammates to finish the story.

"She claimed she was also named Atobe." Oshitari explained. "Supposedly everybody existed properly except for Atobe."

"I didn't exist!" said Atobe.

"It was a traumatizing experience for him." Choutarou added.

"I see." Said Hiyoshi, looking a little disappointed.

"We had to kill her in order to leave that Universe." Said Shishido. "That was interesting."

"I think we've probably killed at least one person in every Universe we've gone to so far." Oshitari said, looking thoughtful. "Have we?"

"I don't know." Atobe replied. "We killed a lot of people in the Detective Universe… then in the Cowboy Universe…we don't know if that sheriff ended up dying or not."

"We killed Dr. Brain in the Superhero Universe." Shishido added.

"I don't think anyone died in the Girls Universe." Choutarou said.

"Oh right." Said Oshitari. "There's one."

"Then we all died in the Mary-Sue Universe." Atobe said.

"Then the Soccer Universe where Kirihara blew up an entire school." Choutarou said, looking a little distraught over that one. "And I don't think anyone died in the OMG Universe."

"OMG?" said Hiyoshi.

"Opposing Musical Gangs." The four of them explained.

"I see." Said Hiyoshi. "And what's this Universe?"

"I don't know." Said Atobe. "Probably Wizard Universe."

"Well, everything revolves around this one kid named Harry Potter." Said Hiyoshi. "So maybe we should call it Harry Potter Universe."

"Call it whatever you want." Said Atobe with a shrug.

And, instead of each forming their own groups, all the remaining people decided to sit together and forge friendships outside of Hyoutei and Seigaku!

"Even in the LEFTOVER group, I'm left out." Said Kirihara.

"How do you figure?" Kamio asked.

"Well, you two are on a team together." Kirihara answered, pointing at Kamio and Shinji. Then he looked at the twins. "And you guys are twins."

"So?" they both said, raising their eyebrows.

"It's just that I'm getting a little frustrated." Kirihara said. "I feel like I've been set up to not have anyone on my side this whole time."

"I think you should stop concentrating on that and worry about more important things." Shinji said. "After all, if he's this concerned about it right now then there's no telling how long it's been festering inside of him and will probably continue to do that, and I don't want to have an annoying person like that hanging around me, so that's probably why he's all alone up to this point…"

"All right Shinji!" said Kamio, covering Shinji's mouth. "Let's leave it at that!"

"Don't talk about me as if I'm not right here!" Kirihara commanded.

"I wasn't." said Shinji.

"Yes you were!" Kirihara commanded.

"Fine." Said Shinji. "Say whatever you want. I don't really care."

Kirihara pouted a moment and then gasped.

"Oh, and again!" said Kirihara. "You both are on Hufflepuff and you two are on Ravenclaw! I'm the only one on Slytherin!"

"You know, we didn't ASK you to hang out with us." Said Atsushi.

"If you're going to be so annoyingly pessimistic then go hang out with some other group." Ryou said.

"No, no." said Kirihara, leaning back. "I'll stop. Let's talk about something else."

"Okay." Said the other four.

They all sat there twiddling their fingers.

"So…what's the first thing you guys are going to do when you get home?" Kamio tried. "I know what I'M going to do!"

"Play tennis." Everyone answered in complete harmony.

"Oh snap." Said Kamio.


	46. God Damn It

Channel 46- God Damn It

"THIS is outrageous!" Shishido rampaged as he stomped into the Slytherin Common Room where everyone else was sitting. Everyone else as in Fuji, Kaidou, Kirihara and Atobe, of course.

"What is?" said Atobe, putting down his best selling novel.

"My first day of classes and I already have detention!" Shishido said angrily as he dropped his book bag on the floor.

Then he looked at the other four who were all just sitting there.

"Wait." He said. "Why didn't you guys go to class?"

"Why DID you?" Fuji asked.

"Because…it was on the schedule…" Shishido said.

"Seriously…we're leaving tomorrow." Kirihara reminded him. "And now you have detention and we don't. And we didn't even have to go to class."

"What did you do?" Kaidou said, only looking vaguely interested.

"I was late for class!" said Shishido. "The teacher didn't give me ANY leeway on my first day!"

"And last day." Atobe pointed out.

"Whatever." Said Shishido, crossing his arms and slumping into a seat.

"So when is your detention?" Fuji asked.

"I'm not going to it." Shishido said.

"You have to go to your detention." Fuji said.

"Why's that?" said Shishido.

"Because," Fuji leaned over and handed a book to Shishido that he had been reading and, as it turned out, it was the rules of the school. "If you don't come to your detention, your teacher has rights to find you and turn you into a toad."

"A toad?" Shishido said, flipping through the book. "Why were you reading this?"

"There was nothing else to read." Fuji answered.

"Okay, fine." Said Shishido, handing him the book. "It's at six. I'm supposed to meet up with someone-or-other behind the school and we're going to go do something-or-other."

"Those are good details." Kaidou commented.

"I was too in shock and enraged to really listen!" Shishido said.

"Oh and by the way." Kirihara said. "Professor Dumbledore came by a little earlier and wanted to confiscate our weapons. He took your utility belt."

"My utility belt?" Shishido yelled, jumping to his feet. "He had no right to do that!"

"Well, apparently one of the students saw Oshitari carrying his gun around, so Dumbledore is making sure to take all of our weapons just to be safe." Atobe said as if it were a huge loss.

"To be safe from what?" said Shishido. "We know how to use our weapons. Mostly. For the most part."

"I was allowed to keep my tennis racket." Fuji said as if that mattered. Then again, to them, it probably DID matter.

"Will you be coming to watch the Hufflepuffs practice today?" Atobe asked.

"Practice what?" asked Shishido.

"Quiddich." Said Atobe. "We were invited to their practice so we can know what it is for the game tomorrow."

"We're ALL going." Said Kaidou.

"When does it start?" Shishido asked.

"…Oh, it starts at six." Fuji said. His tone suggested that the complicated predicament pleased him.

"Lame!" said Shishido. "I wanted to see this!"

"We'll take notes and explain it to you." Said Kirihara as if that was supposed to be any sort of consolation.

"Well, I suppose you're the one who's out of luck." Said Fuji with a contented sigh.

At about six o'clock, everyone gathered down at the Quiddich Arena, with exception of Shishido of course. Since he had detention.

Choutarou was quite upset to hear this.

"Shishido got detention?" he said mournfully. "He can't come to watch me practice?"

"Just be thankful he didn't get detention for tomorrow during the actual game." Inui reminded him. "Otherwise we'd have to go and find him after you win, hopefully, in order to be able to change Universes."

"AND he wouldn't be able to see me play!" Choutarou pointed out.

"That too." Inui adjusted his glasses.

"Come on, let's start practice." Hiyoshi said to Choutarou.

"Well all right." Said Choutarou, but it didn't look quite like he was ready to put ALL HIS HEART AND SOUL into it. I mean, seriously! If Shishido isn't there, then is there any reason?

"Where did you get that notebook to write in, Inui?" Kaidou asked.

"I borrowed it from a fellow student." Inui answered as he took notes on the practice.

"Why are you taking notes?" Eiji whispered as if it had to be a big secret.

"Because," Inui said. "I'm trying to take notes on everything I see in this Universe. Most of it is very illogical and I would like to reexamine what is going on in a controlled environment."

"You know, of course, that you won't get to keep that notebook when we jump to the next Universe." Oshitari pointed out.

Inui stopped his writing, looked up and then peered at Oshitari.

"You could have told me sooner." He said.

"You were the one who was always bragging about how smart you are." Oshitari said. "I figured you knew that."

Inui tossed the book behind him and crossed his legs. "I do not brag." He said adamantly. But who was he convincing? Himself. Only himself.

"Maybe we should hold onto those notes." Said Fuji as he reached back and collected the notebook. "We told Shishido we'd take notes while he was in detention after all."

"Why did he go to class anyway?" questioned Momo.

The other Slytherins shrugged.

The practice went later than expected because there was a game tomorrow. When it was finally over, it looked like it was going to start raining soon.

"It certainly is rainy in this Universe." Atsushi commented, looking up. "Have you guys noticed that?"

"I have noticed that, actually." Inui said. "The day can go from perfectly sunny to terrible rainstorms in a matter of minutes."

"Maybe something bad is happening." Taka suggested.

"Don't even say that, Taka." Said Oishi.

"Sorry." Said Taka.

Shinji, Hiyoshi and Choutarou ditched the rest of the Quiddich team and met up with the large group that was heading back to the castle.

"So did you guys learn anything?" Hiyoshi asked.

"Not really." Said Ryou. "We were mostly confused the whole time."

"Oh." Said Hiyoshi. "Whatever."

"Yeah, it's not like it matters." Said Shinji. "As long as WE know what's going on and Ootori knows what he's doing."

"I hope Shishido doesn't get stuck in the rain during his detention." Choutarou said, getting one last look at the sky before entering the castle.

"His detention is probably over by now." Said Atobe, looking at his watch. "He probably went back to the room because he figured we'd be done watching the practice."

"Well, tell him I said hi and that I'll see him at the game tomorrow!" Choutarou waved to the Slytherins as they parted ways to go to their appointed common rooms.

The Slytherins said their password and entered the common room. They were surprised to discover that everyone was there. And when I say everyone, I mean everyone in Slytherin.

Professor Snape was standing in front of them all, trying to settle them down.

"There is no need for alarm." Professor Snape was in the middle of saying. "Everyone just relax and head back to your rooms as we evaluate a solution to the problem."

The Slytherins seemed nervous as they shuffled back to their rooms.

Kirihara, Atobe, Kaidou and Fuji all looked at each other questioningly and then approached Professor Snape.

"What's going on?" said Kaidou.

"He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is back for sure." Professor Snape replied.

They stared at him blankly.

"Who?" Fuji tried.

"Go to your rooms." Said Professor Snape, looking cross.

"Okay…" they all said as they walked by the greasy haired professor and went up to the place where the two dormitories split.

"Shishido might know what's going on." Said Fuji as he leaned on the entrance to the girl's dormitory. "He likely heard most of the speech. Just ask him and explain it to me in the morning."

"Can you wait that long?" Kirihara asked.

"I don't REALLY care." Fuji admitted as he went into the girl's room and closed the door behind him.

The remaining three shrugged at each other and entered their dormitory. And, where they expected to find Shishido either hanging around the room or in one of the beds, they did NOT. Find him, I mean.

"He can't still be at his detention." Atobe said.

"Where else would he be?" said Kaidou, climbing into his own bed.

"Those are intense detentions." Said Kirihara.

"I suppose we could either ask one of the other students or just wait until morning." Atobe said.

"Wait until morning." Kaidou and Kirihara responded together.

"All right, I suppose I don't care as much as I thought I did either." Atobe said as he lied down as well.

They weren't lying down for more than five minutes before they suddenly heard something moving around their room.

Slowly (and simultaneously!) they raised their heads from the pillows but did not see anyone.

That's when Choutarou instantly appeared, since he had previously been being invisible. He looked super concerned. Like… if that was one of his super powers… yeah.

"What are you doing here?" said Atobe.

"I heard some news in the Hufflepuff Common Room." Choutarou said. "They were talking about someone who must not be named."

"We heard that news too." Said Kaidou.

"Shinji and Hiyoshi told me that the person who should not be named is a very evil wizard who has been plaguing this Universe for years." Choutarou explained.

"So…why are you here?" Kaidou asked.

"Well, I also heard that a student from Slytherin went missing." Choutarou answered. "And I was worried about Shishido. And you guys."

"Don't be worried." Said Kirihara. "Shishido's just still at his detention."

"Is he?" said Atobe. "We don't KNOW that."

"I was extra worried about Shishido because he has a tendency to get kidnapped." Choutarou said.

"We actually don't know where he is." Kaidou admitted.

"He BETTER not be kidnapped." Atobe said with a heavy sigh as he got out of bed. "I'll get to the bottom of this."

He tromped down the stairs where Professor Snape was still standing because that's just the most convenient thing.

"Excuse me." Atobe said. "Did a student go missing earlier today?"

"Yes of course." Said Professor Snape. "Where have you been?"

"Quiddich practice." Atobe said. "Which student?"

"One of the new students." Professor Snape said. "Shishido Ryou."

Atobe closed his eyes and gave a heavy sigh. He turned his back to Professor Snape without another word to him and ascended the stairs back to the dormitory where everyone else was eagerly waiting.

He threw his arms up into the air and nodded.

Choutarou gasped and threw his hands over his mouth.

Kirihara and Kaidou only looked at each other with confused and exasperated expressions.

"God damn it, Shishido." Said Atobe under his breath.


	47. Lord Voldemort

Channel 47- Lord Voldemort

"You know," said Momo as the group sat in the dining hall the next morning. "If Shishido hadn't been stupid enough to actually go to class then he never would have gotten that detention which would have never separated him from us which means that he wouldn't have been kidnapped by the Ultimate Evil in this Universe. It's really just his stupidity that put him in t his situation."

"Hey!" said Choutarou. "Don't say that! There's no telling what kind of horrible perils Shishido is going through!"

"That's true." Hiyoshi said. "But with our game coming up in just a few hours…"

"Let's just win the game and meet up with Shishido in the next Universe." Kamio said.

"That won't work." Said Inui. "We need to all be together for the remote to work when it comes time to change the channel."

"Really?" said Kamio. "That's lame."

"Lame?" Choutarou repeated, his eyes widening. "Guys! We have to save Shishido!"

"We'll save him after the game." Oishi said.

"But I want to save him right now!" Choutarou whined.

"How about this then." Inui said. "A few of us will go save him WHILE you're playing your game."

"But you're going to need me to find him." Choutarou pointed out. "It's not Tuesday so I can use my tracking power."

"With Ootori's many super powers it shouldn't take too long to rescue Shishido." Ryoma pointed out.

"Thank you." Said Choutarou. "The game isn't for another three hours! I'll be back in one."

"I will come along." Inui decided. "Just to make sure you make it back in time."

"I'll come as well." Atobe said, standing up. "In case you need me to shoot anyone."

He pulled out his gun and everyone stared at him.

"Wait, didn't we have to hand over all our weapons?" Taka questioned.

"Yes." Said Atobe. "But not ME. I'm special."

"It's true." Said Oshitari. "He is."

"If it is necessary, stall the game." Inui said to the others. "Don't let it start until we get back."

"You got it!" everyone gave him the thumbs up.

Choutarou, Atobe and Inui walked AWAY from the group.

"I need something that belongs to Shishido so I can track him." Choutarou said.

"Don't you have something?" Atobe asked.

"Why would I have something?" Choutarou said, looking confused.

"I don't know." Said Atobe. "I figured you might."

"All of his things should be back at the Slytherin Dormitories." Inui said. "So let's go there to get something that belongs to him."

They followed Atobe to where the common room was and, as they stood outside the entry way, Atobe glared at the two of them.

"Cover your ears." He instructed.

"Why?" they both asked.

"Because this is the Slytherin Common Room and you two aren't Slytherins so you don't have to right to know our password." Atobe said.

Inui reached out and hit Atobe upside the head.

At first Atobe looked shocked and appeared as though he might start ranting or fill Inui with bullets, when he stopped and took a deep breath.

"I suppose I deserved that." He evaluated calmly.

"Yes, you did." Inui said.

"Don't think you'll get away with it again, though." Atobe warned.

"Guys!" said Choutarou. "Shishido! Remember?"

"Right." Said Atobe and Inui.

Atobe spoke the password and they entered the Slytherin Common Room. They went up to their dormitory and started going through Shishido's stuff.

"How about his glasses?" Inui suggested, picking up the aforementioned object.

"That will work!" said Choutarou, running over and taking the glasses. "I wonder why he wasn't wearing them though."

"He, unlike you, probably realized that he didn't need them and therefore stopped wearing them." Atobe said.

"We need these to hide our identities as Superheroes." Said Choutarou.

"But when you're in different Universes, no one knows you're superheroes anyway." Inui pointed out.

"Exactly." Said Choutarou, not fully understanding. "Because of the glasses."

Inui looked a little puzzled as well.

"Well never mind!" said Choutarou, taking off his own glasses and putting them on the table. "If they offend you guys so much then fine. I won't wear them anymore."

"I really don't care." Said Atobe.

"I honestly forgot that you don't actually wear glasses." Inui admitted.

Choutarou chose to ignore both comments and just concentrated on finding Shishido.

"I think I know where he is." Choutarou said. "If we all hold hands then I can teleport us there."

"Again with the holding hands." Said Inui. "Do we have to hold hands?"

"Yes!" said Choutarou. "Otherwise I won't be able to take you two along! And you two are the ones who wanted to come along. I would be fine without you guys."

"Couldn't we just fly there?" Atobe asked.

"Fine." Said Choutarou. "You'll both have to hold onto my hands while we fly."

Atobe and Inui stared at him.

"What?" he said nervously.

"Why is everything about holding hands?" Inui questioned.

"Well I suppose you could hold onto me some other way, but the easiest and most comfortable way to do it is to hold hands." Choutarou replied.

"Most comfortable?" Atobe repeated.

"Yes." Said Choutarou. "I'm sorry I need to be in contact with you while I'm teleporting or need to hold onto you guys when I'm flying, but that's just the way it works."

"Every moment we stand around here arguing is one less moment we have to make it back in time for the game." Inui pointed out, looking at Atobe.

"Oh fine." Said Atobe. "When you put it that way I suppose we have to do it."

"AND to rescue Shishido." Choutarou added.

"…Yeah, that too." Atobe said.

So everyone took each other's hands and Choutarou began his infamous teleportation process.

Within only a few seconds, they were all in the middle of a graveyard, forsaking each other's hands to look around.

"Couldn't he work out of an office or something?" Atobe said, glancing at his surroundings.

"He wouldn't seem as evil if we arrived at a building that said, Floor Two, proceed down the hall to He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Name's Office." Inui said.

"It was a JOKE." Said Atobe.

"Don't joke in my presence." Said Inui, adjusting his glasses.

"Guys, where's Shishido?" said Choutarou as if they should have known.

"Who dares to trespass in my graveyard?" came a scary hissy voice from all around them.

Suddenly, there was a very dramatic entrance that involved lightning and clouds and shadows and various other evil things, until standing before them was He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named himself!

"Are you He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?" said Inui.

"Yes." Said He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.

"What's your actual name so we don't have to call you that anymore?" Atobe asked.

He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named looked stumped for a moment. "You mean you don't KNOW?"

"No." Atobe answered.

"Then let me show you!" said He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named as he whipped out his wand and pointed it at the sky. He spelled out the letters "I AM LORD VOLDEMORT".

"Lord Voldemort?" Atobe read.

"Yes, that is me!" said Lord Voldemort. "But feel free to continue to refer to me as He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, if you are too frightened to refer to me by my actual name!"

"…Okay…" said Atobe with a raised eyebrow.

"We didn't come here to talk to you Voldemort!" said Choutarou.

"LORD Voldemort." Voldemort corrected.

"Lord Voldemort, whatever." Said Choutarou. "Where is Shishido?"

"Who?" said Lord Voldemort.

"The student you took from the wizard school last night." Inui said.

"Ah yes." Said Lord Voldemort. "I have him. But you can't have him back! I'm saving him as a hostage for when Harry Potter shows up!"

"Wow." Said Atobe. "Everything in this world really DOES revolve around Harry Potter. He's like the equivalent of ME except in this Universe."

"I'd like to meet him." Inui admitted. "Maybe get his autograph."

"We have to save Shishido first!" said Choutarou in a very determined fashion. Then he turned back to Lord Voldemort. "I demand you return Shishido to us!"

Lord Voldemort only stood there for a moment, then he burst into hysterical yet still very evil laughter.

"What are YOU going to do?" said Lord Voldemort. "I fear no one!"

"You seem to fear Harry Potter." Inui pointed out.

"Well, it's not really a fear." Said Lord Voldemort. "I'm more apprehensive about him and his general existence."

"Oh, I see." Said Inui with a nod.

"But your bravery is noted, young students!" said Lord Voldemort. "I shall kill you quickly to honor valiance." He raised his wand once again and pointed it at Choutarou. "_AVADA KADABRA!"_

An evil stream of light went careening right for Choutarou, but he only raised his hand and dissipated it in his palm. Inui and Atobe had both dove behind Choutarou for protection.

Lord Voldemort peered over his wand to see that they were all still standing.

"What?" said Lord Voldemort, studying his wand. "Did I say the wrong spell?"

"We weren't done talking, Lord Voldemort!" said Choutarou. "Tell me where Shishido is and we'll leave you alone!"

"Enough!" said Lord Voldemort as he once again pointed his wand at Choutarou. "_AVADA KADABRA!"_

The evil light once again went right towards Choutarou, but this time he just batted it to the side so it hit a tree, causing the tree to explode and fall over.

"I'm SERIOUS." Choutarou said as if that hadn't just happened.

"What kind of wizard are you?" demanded Lord Voldemort. "You can't merely be a student! How could you have parried the most unforgivable of all the Unforgivable Curses twice and so very easily?"

"Please," said Choutarou. "Just give Shishido back to us and we'll let you go back to whatever it was you were doing involving Harry Potter and getting your revenge on him."

Lord Voldemort smiled an evil twisted smile. "Very well." He said as he raised both his arms and disappeared in the same way he had appeared.

Choutarou nodded and looked satisfied.

"That went well." He said, turning around and looking at Atobe and Inui who were both still cowering in fear.

"What happened to this tree?" Inui said, looking at the three that had fallen over and was now on fire.

"I don't know." Said Choutarou. "But I have to admit, my hand kind of stings."

Just then, Lord Voldemort once again made his grand entrance and he was once again standing before him, holding Shishido by his collar.

"Shishido!" Choutarou exclaimed.

"Choutarou!" said Shishido.

"Here we are." Said Lord Voldemort as he threw Shishido to the ground. "I have returned him. However, you unfortunately did not specify in what kind of state you wished for him to be returned!"

"What?" Choutarou said as he went over to Shishido to help him up.

"_AVADA KADABRA!" _Lord Voldemort yelled as he cast his evil light spell at the two of them.

"Uh oh." Inui said as he watched both of them absorb the blast and go flying backwards in different directions. Lord Voldemort just stood there laughing diabolically as they landed and skidded across the ground.

After somewhat of a pause, Lord Voldemort looked at Inui and Atobe. "You two are next!" he declared, pointing his wand at them.

"Oh dear!" said Atobe and Inui as they covered their faces as if that would protect them.

A few seconds passed and they both realized that they weren't dead so they opened their eyes again to see Choutarou standing in front of them with his hand outstretched, having taken another killing curse in the hand.

"What?" yelled Lord Voldemort. "How could you still be alive after FOUR Unforgivable Curses?"

"I have to say that those curses are appropriately named." Said Choutarou. "Because I won't forgive you for being so mean!"

"He should have left it at saying the curses were appropriately named." Atobe whispered to Inui.

"I agree." Inui said with a sigh.

"And what do you plan on doing?" Lord Voldemort said.

But before he could say or do anything else, Choutarou used super speed to run right up next to Lord Voldemort, grab his head and then snap his neck all in under a second.

Lord Voldemort fell to the ground.

"I didn't want to have to do that." Choutarou said, clenching his fist dramatically.

"Nicely done." Said Atobe.

"Is this a theme that will continue?" Inui wondered.

"Well, now that that's over with, let's head back to the school for the game so we can get out of here!" said Choutarou. "Where's Shishido?"

He looked around, but then watched as Atobe and Inui both pointed over at where Shishido was still lying.

"Oh." Said Choutarou. "He must have hit his head when Lord Voldemort used cast the Unforgivable Curse on us."

He went over to Shishido and looked down at him.

"I don't think so, Ootori." Said Atobe.

Choutarou bent down and looked Shishido over. Then he looked back to Atobe and Inui. "He's not…" he started. "…Is he?"

Inui and Atobe walked over. Inui put his hand on Shishido's neck, waited a minute or so and then looked up.

"Sorry." He shrugged.

Choutarou's mouth dropped open.

"SHISHIDO!" he yelled to the heavens. "NOOOOOOOOO!"


	48. Quidditch

Channel 48- Quiddich

"So it is time for us to say goodbye to a great friend, a great sidekick and a great doubles partner." Inui said as Atobe and Choutarou stood on either side of a mound of dirt.

"Can we go now?" said Atobe. "He's going to be resurrected when we go to the next Universe anyway."

"Sh!" said Choutarou. "This is very emotional for me."

"He's died once before already." Inui pointed out.

"But I wasn't alive or conscious to feel pain for it." Choutarou said as he wiped his eyes with a hanky.

"We really have to get to the game." Said Atobe, looking at his watch.

"I feel guilty about leaving Shishido here!" Choutarou said. "We should take him with us."

"No, Ootori." Said Atobe. "We took all this time to bury him because you wanted to honor his death so badly. We are not going to dig him up and then carry around a corpse for the rest of the day."

"This isn't just A CORPSE!" said Choutarou. "This is SHISHIDO!"

"Will you just get over it?" said Inui.

"I can't!" said Choutarou. "I miss him."

"Just think." Said Inui. "If we hurry up and get back to the game and you win then we can leave this Universe today and you'll see Shishido very soon. But, if we take too much time waiting around like we are right now then we'll miss the game and we'll have to wait until Wednesday before we get another chance."

"That's a long time to wait to see Shishido." Atobe added.

"You're right." Said Choutarou. "Shishido wouldn't want me to stand around and mourn his death when I have to avenge him by winning a Quiddich game!"

"Sure, if that's what gets you fired up, then let's do it." said Atobe.

"Yeah!" said Choutarou. "I AM all fired up!"

"So let's go." Said Inui. "And as an added bonus, Atobe and I won't even complain about holding hands."

"That's right, we won't." Atobe nodded.

"Aw, thanks you guys." Said Choutarou.

They all joined hands like the best friends in the entire world and, with one last goodbye to Shishido's corpse, Choutarou teleported them back to the Quiddich arena into the Hufflepuff locker room area where everyone was quite taken aback by their sudden appearance.

"Apparating!" exclaimed the captain as he ran over to Choutarou and practically started molesting him with excitement. "What an advanced spell for only a third year! You are so amazing!"

"Uh…thanks!" said Choutarou.

"Hurry up and get ready." Hiyoshi ordered. "Another few minutes and you would have been late."

"And you guys get out of here." Shinji ordered of Inui and Atobe.

Even though Inui and Atobe were SO offended, they departed the locker room area.

They went up into the stands where they had earlier arranged to meet up with everyone else. Sure enough, they were there.

"Aw…I was excited to stall the game…" said Kirihara, dejectedly putting the stick of dynamite back in his pocket.

"I don't want to know." Inui said, sitting down.

"So how did it go?" Oshitari asked Atobe.

"Don't ask." Atobe replied.

"Where's Shishido?" Oshitari looked around.

"I said don't ask." Atobe reminded him.

"Did you end up finding him?" Oshitari said, obviously not taking a hint.

Atobe grabbed Oshitari's shoulder and pulled him over. "DON'T ASK." He said, roughly letting go of him. Oshitari readjusted his clothing and finally decided to let it slide.

"And definitely don't bring it up in front of Ootori." Inui said. "'It' being Shishido of course."

"Why, what happened?" Eiji said. "You guys can't ambiguously be talking about what happened and NOT tell us."

"Shishido died, didn't he?" said Fuji finally.

"Essentially." Atobe and Inui answered together.

"There, now that wasn't so hard, was it?" said Fuji, looking happy.

"Well, that must have been slightly traumatizing for Ootori." Momo established.

"Yeah so don't bring it up." Atobe warned. "At least not until we get to the next Universe and Shishido is alive again."

"Hopefully we won't get the opportunity to talk to him again until we get to the next Universe, if this game goes as well as he was implying it was going to go during practice." Said Kaidou.

"We can only hope." Inui said as the announcer began introducing the players for each team.

"We're going to have to postpone this game," came the voice of an elder behind them. "I'll go up and make the announcement right now."

Slowly, they all turned to see Professor Snape maneuvering away from the other teachers towards the announcer's box.

"Excuse me," said Kirihara, jumping to his feet and stopping Snape. "Why postpone the game?"

"A student has been killed." Professor Snape answered. "This is not the time for Quiddich."

Kirihara looked back at the group.

Atobe got to his feet as well and went over to Snape.

"I'll come with you." He offered.

"I don't need you to come with me." Said Professor Snape scornfully.

Atobe looked at the group and gave them a face that assured them that they didn't have to worry. So they put all their faith and trust in Atobe and watched him follow after Professor Snape.

The announcer continued to introduce the players, and everyone twiddled their fingers, secretly terrified of the potential sudden cancellation of the game.

Just then, Atobe returned and took his seat next to Oshitari again.

"What did you do?" Ryoma said.

"Just don't ask." Atobe said.

"Poor Professor Snape." Said Eiji, looking distressed.

"I think the game's about to start." Taka observed.

They all looked down at the field to see that both teams were all out and ready to go. The referee signaled for the game to start and then threw the ball up into the air that officially began the game.

Choutarou hovered in mid air for a moment, only looking around for the golden ball he had been informed he had to find.

A large black ball suddenly came careening towards him, so he reached out and PALMED it.

"What?" he said, looking at the ball that was sort of growling at him.

He looked around to see if anyone had noticed that.

He descended a tad until he was almost level with Hiyoshi who was looking around frantically for something. "Does it count if I catch one of these?" Choutarou asked, holding out the ball he had caught.

"No." said Hiyoshi. "ONLY the Snitch."

"That's the golden one, right?" said Choutarou.

"Yes." Said Hiyoshi. "Now drop that ball. It's my job to take care of that one."

"Oh, I'm sorry." Choutarou said, letting go of the ball and it immediately flew off, Hiyoshi in hot pursuit.

Choutarou frowned and went higher into the air again, searching for the golden ball.

He felt bad for letting Shishido die.

"Everything okay?" came a voice behind him, and he turned around to see Shinji fly over to him.

"Oh yes," said Choutarou. "Everything's fine."

"Why aren't you catching the ball?" Shinji asked.

"Oh, I haven't really been looking for it…" Choutarou admitted.

"Well you should hurry up." Shinji said. "The seeker for Gryffindor is Harry Potter and he tends to pull out miraculous wins no matter who his opponent is, so if you want us to win this game then you'd better hurry."

"I want us to win this game more than anything!" Choutarou said, but he was only halfway finished with his statement before another big black ball came out of nowhere and hit him in the side of the face.

Shinji gasped out loud as Choutarou didn't even flinch.

"These are annoying." Said Choutarou as he grabbed the ball, which was now flattened on one side, and then threw it away.

"Um…okay…" said Shinji. "Just catch the Snitch, all right?"

"All right." Choutarou said. "I'll try my best!"

Shinji flew off, and Choutarou clenched his fist dramatically.

"For you, Shishido!" he said to the sky. And I'm willing to bet he even saw Shishido's encouraging expression in the clouds and heard his words of wisdom in the wind.

That's when he noticed the gold ball he was supposed to catch fly by his face.

"Oh!" he said, and was just about to pick it right out of the air, when Harry Potter flew by at top speed on his broom.

The ball took off, and Harry Potter followed it with his hand outstretched.

"No!" said Choutarou. "Hufflepuff has to win for Shishido!"

He followed after Harry Potter and the ball, forgetting to hold onto his broom and therefore dropping it to the ground. He hovered there in midair and realized his mistake, but decided to just forget about it and hope no one noticed.

Of course everyone noticed because the announcer had just screamed, "It seems as though Hufflepuff's new Third Year Seeker, Choutarou Ootori, has dropped his broom but has somehow managed to remain suspended in the air and is still pursuing the Snitch!"

The entire crowd got to their feet to lean over and watch.

"Whoops." Ryou commented.

"It doesn't matter as long as we win this game." Atsushi said. "If we lose, then we'll probably have a lot of explaining to do."

"Losing is not an option." Inui said.

Choutarou continued to pursue the Snitch, but somehow Harry Potter always remained just an arms length ahead of him. How is that possible? Because he's Harry Potter of course.

So Choutarou was starting to get frustrated when he could clearly see Harry Potter's fingertips graze the Snitch. He grabbed the end of Harry Potter's broom and pulled it right out from underneath him. Harry Potter plummeted to the ground and landed in a heap.

Choutarou held the broom a second and then looked down at Harry Potter.

"…Sorry!" he called, looking truly apologetic.

"It seems as though Choutarou Ootori has…taken Harry Potter's broom!" the announcer decided. "Is that legal?"

A judge waved a green flag.

"All right, now to get that ball." Said Choutarou, pretending to ride the new broom he had just acquired as he pursued the Snitch.

Once again, the black ball came in his direction and, let's get real here, he was starting to get very irritated by them, so he just smacked it aside, sending it careening towards the Gryffindor Keeper who took it right in the face and also fell down to the ground.

"WHAT am I DOING?" Choutarou gasped as he watched in horror at what had resulted in his violent lashing out.

"Nice going!" said one of the Hufflepuff Chasers as he threw the ball into one of the now completely unguarded hoops.

"I didn't mean to!" Choutarou tried to tell him but he was ignored again.

He closed his eyes and concentrated.

"Forget all that." He said. "Just find the gold ball."

He opened his eyes and used his SUPER VISION to find the Snitch's exact location. He held out his hand in just the right spot and then teleported in front of it with his hand wrapped around it automatically.

There was silence in the arena for a few moments before everyone then erupted with cheers.

"Hufflepuff wins!" the announcer shouted. "Thanks to their new star Seeker, Hufflepuff wins!"

"Nice going, Ootori." Hiyoshi said as he flew over.

"I just…wish Shishido was here to see…" Choutarou sniffled.

Inui stood up and looked at his remote, and watched the screen change to "Complete".

"That should do it." He said as the white light formed behind him and he pressed the button.

Suddenly, they were all together in the middle of a clearing with trees surrounding them.

"What do you suppose—" Inui began, but he was interrupted by a very excited cheer.

"SHISHIDO!" Choutarou exclaimed as he grabbed Shishido, lifted him right up off his feet and spun him around.

"Choutarou, let go!" Shishido ordered.

Choutarou let go of him, and Shishido oriented himself.

"What happened?" he said, looking minimally confused.

"You died." Choutarou said.

"I know." Said Shishido. "I was there for that part. I missed everything that happened after that."

"It's pretty self explanatory, isn't it?" said Oishi. "We obviously won the game since we're in the next Universe."

"I guess." Said Shishido with a frown.

"I'm so glad you're all right, Shishido!" said Choutarou. "I was so upset when you died."

"I should hope so." Shishido said, taking off his glasses. Choutarou took his glasses off too because he wanted to be cool like Shishido. And he was rather giddy.

"Are we going to have to be like this all the time?" said Hiyoshi, noting that he was wearing his black robes with his uniform underneath it and his scarf.

"At least we have our brooms." Said Shinji.

"You two just don't even complain." Fuji warned them.

Then there was a slight pause in the conversation.

"Anyway, as I was saying." Inui said, clearing his throat. "What do you suppose this Universe's theme is?"

Everyone took one brief look around and then shrugged at Inui. If HE didn't know, they certainly didn't know why he expected THEM to know.


	49. Join or Serve

Channel 49- Join or Serve

They hung around that clearing for a long time in hope that someone would show up and be like: OH HEY GUYS!

Unfortunately, that did not happen. Night rolled around and a fire was started. Once again, they had to subject themselves to sleeping outside.

"Ootori, why don't you go and scout out the area?" Atobe said.

"Huh?" Choutarou said.

"Go and see if there are any large castles or little houses or even a Best Western if you can find it." Said Atobe.

"Why does it have to be me?" Choutarou said, looking almost hurt.

"Because you can fly and you have super speed." Kirihara pointed out.

"Oh." Choutarou looked down.

Everyone waited.

"Looks like you'll have to tell them, Choutarou." Said Shishido, putting his hand on Choutarou's shoulder.

"Tell us what?" said Inui. "What day is it? Can you not fly or use super speed on Saturdays?"

"It's not that." Choutarou said. "It's just…"

He pointed at the sky.

"The new moon." He answered. "There's no moon tonight."

Everyone waited… AGAIN.

"Choutarou gets his strength from the moon." Shishido explained. "When there's no moon, he loses all of his powers."

Choutarou let out a noticeable sniffle.

"Well, that's all right." Said Oishi. "It's only one night."

"Actually, I sort of lose my powers until I'm physically under the moonlight again." Choutarou said.

"All right…" said Oishi. "So you won't have your powers all day tomorrow?"

"No." Choutarou said. "I was hoping you guys wouldn't have to find out!"

"We were going to find out eventually." Said Eiji. "We exploit your powers so much after all."

"That's true." Choutarou nodded.

"In any case, it's irrelevant." Said Inui. "We waited here for this long and no one came. Tomorrow morning we'll leave and hope we wander in the correct direction."

"And once it gets to be morning again, Shinji and I could use our brooms to scope out the area." Hiyoshi added.

"That too." Said Inui. "I did not take that into account."

"Alas, I must once again sleep outside." Atobe sighed.

They all sat there and stared at the fire foolishly until Ryoma suddenly stood and put his hand on his neck.

"I think I was just stung by a bee." He said.

Everyone laughed at him. "Oh Ryoma!" they said. "You WOULD have been! Silly Ryoma!"

Ryoma then pulled something out of his neck; a little red feather with a needle attached to it.

Everyone leaned over to see it, when Ryoma collapsed to the ground in a heap. Except it wasn't humorous because he didn't trip or anything. He just fell.

"This is no bee sting." Inui said, picking up the needle feather.

"Wow Inui." Said Momo.

Inui glared at Momo. But the glare was short lived because Eiji let out a gasp and then stepped forward, holding another needle feather.

"I got another one!" he said, and then promptly fell forward as well.

Oishi caught him. "He's sleeping." he said after checking his pulse.

"I think we need to find cover." Oshitari said.

That suggestion was short lived, however, because sixteen more precisely aimed red feathers flew towards our heroes, hitting each and every one of them right where they were intended to hit.

A little while later, Inui was slowly waking up from his peaceful slumber only to find that he was wearing different clothes. This bummed him out because not only did that mean that everything on his person had been taken, including the precious remote control, but that ALSO meant that someone had undressed and redressed him, which is awkward for ANYONE to think of.

He was slightly comforted by the presences of a few of his comrades, but then that comfort was quickly shot down once he realized that he was inside a small jail-like confinement area that was clearly in the basement of an old building.

"I'm glad you're awake, Inui." Said Taka. "Now you can help get us out of here with a plan."

"Here?" Inui said.

"Yeah, we don't exactly know that." Taka admitted.

Inui glanced around the room and realized just how few people were present. Only he, Taka, Atobe, Oshitari and Choutarou were there. They were all dressed in matching white outfits.

"Where is everyone else?" Inui asked.

"Yeah, we don't really know that either." Taka said.

Inui looked down at his clothing once again. "This is so we will be easily noticed if we try to escape." Inui reasoned.

Everyone looked at each other.

"All right…so…what do we do?" Choutarou asked.

"Obviously we have no weapons." Inui noted. "Or anything to work with at all really."

"We know that." Said Atobe said.

"Well." Said Inui as he quickly studied everyone. "We are the five tallest."

"Five tallest?" Oshitari repeated.

"Of the eighteen of us." Inui answered, standing up and brushing himself off. "I don't know if it has any relevance, but we five are the tallest in the group."

"I agree!" said Choutarou. "It seems TOO coincidental for it to be JUST a coincidence."

"Please," Inui said, putting his hand on Choutarou's shoulder. "From now on, don't talk."

"Oh…sorry." Choutarou said, lowering his head.

"Now let's see…" said Inui. "Clearly it is no mistake that we have been separated in such a way. So that means that whoever has taken us captive was studying us for quite some time."

"Stop making observations and start thinking of a way for us to escape!" Atobe ordered.

"Don't rush me." Said Inui as he started inspecting his surroundings.

"I hope Shishido's okay." Said Choutarou somewhat randomly. "I mean, he only JUST came back to life."

"Let's all stop worrying about Shishido and start worrying about ourselves." Atobe offered in kind of that nice/mean sarcastic tone that just makes EVERYONE lose.

Just then, they heard the sound of a door unlocking, then the sound of many feet descending the stairs.

Surprisingly enough, Ryoma came into view.

"Ryoma, do something to—" Taka started, but he stopped because he noticed that Ryoma was wearing the same white outfit, and was soon followed by a man dressed in all black carrying weapons on his back.

One by one, Shinji, Kamio, Atsushi, Ryou and Kaidou all came in as well, each followed by a man in black, and then they were all ushered into another cell that was right across from where the tall folk were. The swinging bars were closed, and then they were silent.

Without even saying a word, the men in black departed.

"Well?" said Inui.

"We failed." Atsushi said.

"Failed what?" Oshitari questioned.

"The Ninja Test." Ryou answered.

No one knew how to respond.

"I see." Inui was the first to react in a vocal manner.

"They gave us the whole shpeal." Kaidou said. "Apparently we're in some kind of monastery of a group of elite ninjas that have a join or serve attitude."

"Join or serve or die." Kamio corrected.

"What does that mean?" Choutarou asked.

"Well, after they knocked us all out, they separated us into two groups." Shinji explained.

"People who were too tall and everyone else?" Inui inferred.

"Right." Said Shinji. "But they called it people who had the 'ninja body type'."

"So we they didn't even give us a CHANCE at taking the Ninja Test just because we're tall?" Choutarou gasped.

"Pretty much." Said Shinji.

"So what was this Ninja Test?" asked Inui.

"They looked through our stuff to see what kinds of weapons we had, then there was an obstacle course and then they made us fight one of their ninjas to see how our fighting skills were." Ryoma said.

"So the six of you failed at that." Atobe said.

"What was that thing you mentioned… join or serve or die?" Taka asked.

"Well," said Atsushi. "Essentially everyone who passed the test have the options to join or serve. If they chose neither then they're killed."

"And what about everyone who didn't pass or didn't even get a chance to pass?" Choutarou asked.

"Our option is to serve." Said Atsushi. "And if we don't serve then we die."

"So who passed?" Inui counted heads. "Eiji, Momo…"

"Shishido." Choutarou added.

"Hiyoshi." Atobe observed. "Kirihara."

"Fuji and Oishi." Taka said.

"Those two weren't there." Kaidou said. "We don't really know where they are."

"All right…all that being said…" Oshitari said slowly. "Did you see anyone who is from our Universe?"

"No." said Ryou. "We sort of all got to thinking that whoever appeared here got in a confrontation with the ninjas, had the join or serve or die option and… well… ended up dying."

"What happens then?" said Taka to Inui.

"I don't know." Inui admitted.

"We're not stuck here forever, are we?" Atobe demanded.

"You know what?" said Inui. "I'm as clueless as the rest of you. I don't even have the remote right now. Before we do anything, we have to find the remote."

"Actually, before we find the remote, we have to escape." Shinji pointed out.

"Thank you for that." Said Inui.

"And find Fuji and Oishi." Taka said.

"Yes, probably all of that is necessary as well." Inui agreed.

"Is it daytime yet?" Choutarou asked.

"It's probably about midday, would you say?" Ryoma said to the others.

"If I could just get outside when the moon's out then I could easily break us out of here." Choutarou said.

"We're all quite aware of that." Said Atobe.

"It really is quite inconvenient that this is the exact time in which you lose your powers." Oshitari commented.

"What?" said Choutarou. "It's not like I planned it."

"Hang on." Said Inui.

Everyone hanged.

"What?" said Kaidou finally.

"Just think." Said Inui. "In every Universe so far, the person who has been there has always been apart of the community that is taking place, not an outsider who has to experience the world for the first time."

"AND?" said everyone, sort of irritated with Inui's totally random comment.

"AND," Inui went on. "It wouldn't make sense for the person or people who appeared here to just be random people who get captured by the ninjas like we did. It is likely that the person or people are A PART of this ninja group."

"If they are, why haven't they made themselves known to us?" said Shinji.

"Well, wait." Said Inui. "We'll address that in a moment. In the meantime, can any of you think of anyone who might be defined as 'the ninja body type' according to these ninjas? Essentially… anyone who is short?"

"Uchimura!" said Kamio.

"No…someone relevant." Inui said.

"Huh?" said Kamio.

"Gakuto is pretty short." Said Oshitari. "I think he's hardly five feet."

"Five foot two." Said Inui. SINCE HE KNOWS.

"…Okay." Said Oshitari.

"Yuuta's sort of on the short side." Said Atsushi. "He's about my height."

"Aoi, maybe." Ryou tried.

"There may be someone on Rikkai Dai as well." Atobe said. "But I also just thought of Jirou. He is quite short as well."

"So those are only a few people that we have to make sure to keep a lookout for." Inui said. "But, for all I know, your theory about them dying already might also be true. If that's the case, I don't know what we could do."

"Could we please just pretend that's not even an option?" Taka pleaded.


	50. In Due Time

Channel 50- In Due Time

The eleven prisoners spent the remainder of the day and that night in the cell. Choutarou was obsessively trying to track the moon out the tiny window that was provided so far off the ground that even HE had to be hoisted up to see out it.

"No good." Choutarou said as they almost dropped him back to the ground. "There's a big tree in the way, so when the moon goes by this window none of the light will get in."

He turned around and realized that he was getting a lot of raised eyebrows.

"You have to physically stand in the light of the moon?" Atobe said.

"Yes…" said Choutarou embarrassingly.

"I don't know." Said Shinji. "That just seems dumb to me. It could be all in your head. Are you sure it's not all in your head?"

"Yes, quite sure." Choutarou sat down and pouted.

"It's like that story with the swan that would go into the moon that was on the water in that lake and then she'd turn back into a princess." Said Kamio.

And now HE was getting a lot of raised eyebrows.

"Come on, you all know the story, you KNOW you do." Said Kamio, crossing his arms.

"I still don't get the whole thing where tall people aren't allowed to be ninjas." Said Oshitari, looking perplexed. "I mean, when you turn the corner, isn't there always that huge guy standing there with the num chucks and then he just owns everyone?"

"Yeah, I know what you mean." Taka agreed.

"I'm not even that tall." Said Atobe. "I'm MUCH shorter than the four of you."

"You're not that much shorter than me." Said Oshitari, standing up straight.

Atobe stood up straight as well and the two of them measured themselves up against each other.

"But I guess someone had to be the cutoff." Said Taka. "You were probably just that much taller than the tallest short person."

"Who was the tallest out of all the short people over there?" Atobe said to the group of shorter people.

"Out of all of us is Kaidou." Ryou said.

Kaidou just stood there looking menacing.

"What am I… an INCH taller than you?" Atobe guessed.

"Could everyone just stop?" Inui said, sounding exasperated. "Obviously we have all been in this small enclosed area together for too long. We're all tired and hungry and I'm willing to bet that at least half of you have to go to the bathroom. We're all irritable so let's just try to get some sleep."

"How could we possibly sleep?" Taka sighed. "Fuji and Oishi are still MIA, while Eiji, Momo, Kirihara, Hiyoshi and Shishido are off doing ninja stuff. Then we still haven't found whoever's supposed to be in this Universe AND we don't have the remote control."

"Taka, you're supposed to remain positive when all of us are describing the impossible situation." Inui pointed out.

"I'm sorry, I'd love to be positive, but there's no way to be optimistic about this situation." Taka said sadly.

Everyone sighed heavily.

Just then, the door opened and closed again. The door was out of sight and so were the stairs that brought the person down to the level of the cells.

They all waited for the person to descend the stairs.

"Are you all down there?" came Fuji's familiar voice.

"Well, that was the last person I expected to come and rescue us." Ryoma admitted.

"I'm here too!" came Oishi's voice.

"Oh, well, we're glad to know that you two are still alive." Said Inui. "Where have you been?"

"That's the thing." Said Oishi.

"Why don't you come down the stairs so we can see you?" Atobe said.

"That's the other thing." Fuji said.

"What?" said everyone else.

"Okay…we'll come down the stairs only if you all promise not to say anything or even look like you're going to laugh or look like you're trying not to laugh." Oishi said.

"How are we supposed to not laugh when you give us a warning like that?" said Kamio.

"If you're going to be like that then we're just going to leave!" Oishi threatened.

"No, no." said Inui. "Come down. We won't laugh."

"You better not because we previously discussed this and we will have no qualms with just leaving." Fuji warned.

Now the anticipation was so great that everyone was pretty much already laughing before Oishi and Fuji stepped into view.

Both of them were dressed in very glamorous bridal dresses, decked out head to toe in the most expensive of jewelry and perfectly tailored material. No one said anything because they all knew that they wouldn't be able to change their facial expressions without bursting out laughing.

"I told you they'd do this." Said Oishi when he noticed that everyone was standing straight as boards, not moving and not speaking. Not even BREATHING.

Pretty soon, they needed air or else they would have killed themselves from oxygen deprivation. The laughter echoed quite loudly and intensely, while Oishi stood there looking as though he could have died and been happier, and Fuji just stood there looking like Fuji.

When everyone was finally done, Fuji turned to Oishi.

"Well, let's go." He said.

"NO NO NO!" the caged ones urged as they reached out for the brides whence they had turned their backs to go.

Only shameful groveling got them to return. And, even though it was still hilarious to see them in such a state, those who did a better job at keeping a straight face did their best to maneuver their ways in front of those who couldn't contain their giggles.

"All right…so…" Inui said, gesturing towards their outfits.

"The leader of the ninjas has two sons." Fuji said plainly. "I don't think we have to explain anymore."

"So he's going to make you two marry them?" Oshitari asked.

"Oh, we already married them." Fuji said. "About fifteen minutes ago."

Then there was more silence.

And more cruel laughter that simply couldn't be contained.

"STOP!" Oishi whined. "Make them stop, Fuji!"

Fuji took a deep breath and then pierced everyone with his scary glare, which immediately silenced everyone for miles. Even a few bunnies and chipmunks hopping around outside suddenly dropped dead because their tiny bodies simply could not withstand the force of the glare.

"We came here to help you all." Said Fuji. "This is no way to get us to continue to put ourselves in danger."

"Okay, okay." Said Inui. "Tell us everything you know. Have you discovered who the people in this Universe are that we have to rescue?"

"No." Fuji answered. "But we did learn that there's a small band of about eight ninjas who are away from the monastery at this time and they will return in the morning."

"We're hoping that the ones we're looking for are in that group." Oishi said.

"That is a very real possibility." Inui said.

"Another thing." Fuji said as he whipped something out from behind his back.

"THE REMOTE CONTROL!" practically everyone shrieked as Fuji handed it over to Inui.

"I don't know if it'll do you any good." Fuji said.

"We're better off with it than without it." Inui said, checking the counter to see that it still read 13.

"And, while we can't let you out since we don't have the keys…" Fuji went on. "As a gift, our new husbands are…"---he paused a moment when he heard someone chuckle, but continued when he heard hands being thrown over the perpetrator's mouth—"…giving us each a gift of being able to choose one of the prisoners to be our man-slave."

"Oh, one of us?" Ryou asked.

"Yes, very good." Said Fuji.

"Is there anyone in particular we should pick?" Oishi asked.

"ME!" said essentially everyone at the same time.

"No, one of you choose Ootori." Said Inui, grabbing Choutarou and pulling him over. "And get him outside when the moon's out for crying out loud."

"That's a good idea!" Choutarou said, looking excited.

"That can be arranged." Said Fuji. "Anyone else?"

"I don't know…me I guess." Inui said.

"Why you?" demanded everyone else.

"Inui, it's better for you to stay here where the majority is and you can play with your remote control." Said Atsushi.

Inui frowned but he knew Atsushi was right.

"So I suppose it doesn't matter then." Fuji said. "All right, our second decision will be candid. Now, if you'll excuse us…we have to celebrate our recent marriages."

Oishi slapped his forehead and followed Fuji up the stairs and out the door.

Everyone slapped their knees and enjoyed another good chuckle at their expense.

Meanwhile, above ground, things were not all happy and fluffy. No. It was hard being a ninja.

"I don't know WHY I'm here or HOW I passed the test or WHERE everyone else is but I'm bored and tired and I want to go to sleep…" whined Momo as he balanced on a log raised high in the air. Eiji, Hiyoshi, Kirihara and Shishido were each on their own log balancing as well. This was one of the many tests to become a true ninja in the monastery.

"You heard them!" said Eiji. "If we don't pass the extensive ninja tests then we don't get to be ninjas and we become prisoners instead!"

"Or we die." Hiyoshi added.

"Right." Said Eiji. "Or we die."

"We have to pass these tests so we're given the right to roam around free and so we can find everyone else and free them." Shishido said bravely and heroically.

"Yeah but…I was EXCITED about passing!" Momo whined. "I thought we could get right down to the ninja stuff. All this dumb stuff they're making us do to prove we're good enough is just making it not fun."

"Well, anyone could have passed that obstacle course." Kirihara said. "It was mainly just testing flexibility, how high we can jump and how well we could squeeze through small spaces."

"All I'm saying is that I'm glad I was given the abilities that a pirate has or else I probably wouldn't have passed the fighting part." Momo admitted.

"What do you think they did with everyone else…?" Eiji wondered. "I hope they didn't kill them." Then Eiji gasped. "I can't believe I even just said that! I'm sure they're all fine!"

"How long did they say we had to stay up here anyway?" Kirihara asked.

"Until morning." Hiyoshi replied. "But don't get your hopes up. We probably have a slew of annoying tasks we have to complete before they let us get any rest. It's part of the whole training."

"How would you know something random like that?" said Momo. "You're not a ninja. You don't KNOW."

"It's just obvious." Said Hiyoshi. "Anyone with half a thought in his head could think of it."

"Whatever." Said Momo, avoiding eye contact.

There were many reasons to wait for the sun to rise the next morning.


	51. The Lord's Sons

Channel 51- The Lord's Sons

"Hm…" Fuji stroked his chin very pensively as he paced back and forth, staring each one of the prisoners up and down. There were a handful of ninjas standing around him, with Oishi to his left. Oishi wasn't quite as into the role as apparently Fuji had gotten.

"Have you chosen one yet?" said one of the ninjas, sounding a little impatient.

"This is a big decision." Said Fuji, putting his hand out. "Don't rush me."

The ninja looked at Oishi. "I don't know." Said Oishi. "I'll take that one."

He pointed at Choutarou.

"Me?" said Choutarou, acting all surprised.

"All right, and you?" said the ninja to Fuji.

Fuji shrugged. "Taka, would it make you uncomfortable to be my man-slave?" he asked.

"Frankly, Fuji, the word 'man-slave' makes me uncomfortable." Taka said.

"Technically it's two words." Oshitari pointed out.

"Actually, it's hyphenated." Inui corrected.

"They've selected!" said the ninjas as if they had been waiting for ages as they unlocked the cell and pointed shiny weapons at all those inside.

They backed up, and the ninjas grabbed both Choutarou and Taka by the arm and pulled them out. It did look a little silly because both of the ninjas were very short while Choutarou and Taka were obviously among the tallest.

They were held at num-chuck point as they waved goodbye to their fellow captives and headed up the stairs with their escorts, as well as the two beautiful ladies.

"Hi guys!" came Eiji's voice from the small pond that was in the middle of the monastery, along with the four others who passed the ninja test. "Oishi, you look awesome in that outfit!"

"Be quiet, Eiji!" Oishi shouted.

"No, seriously!" said Eiji.

"How long have they been treading in that pond?" Fuji asked one of the ninjas.

"Almost an hour." The ninja answered. "They are doing surprisingly well in all of our ninja tests."

The ninja escorts led Fuji, Taka, Oishi and Choutarou to the main building in the middle and took them into a grand room that was obviously meant to house females since there were colorful pillows and pretty dresses all over the place.

The ninjas closed the doors and then stood in front of them like statues, guarding.

Fuji and Oishi stared at the ninjas guarding the door, and then backed up a little bit. Taka and Choutarou were just standing there like: "Lur?"

"Well." Said Fuji as he went over to one of the large piles of pillows and lounged on it. "I guess we wait then."

"For what?" Taka asked.

"To meet our husbands." Oishi sighed.

"Meet them?" Choutarou repeated.

"Yes, they'll be coming back from their mission any minute now." Fuji answered.

"Wait, so you guys are supposedly married to them but you haven't even met them yet?" Taka clarified.

"Pretty much." Oishi said, sitting down on the pillows as well. "How unfair is that! But actually…" he sorted out his priorities. "The fact that we had to marry anyone in the first place is mostly the unfair part."

"How do you have a wedding without the grooms being there?" Choutarou pondered.

"Apparently the Ninja Lord does this all the time." Fuji said. "He arranges marriages while his sons are on a mission and then introduces them to the wives when they return."

"…What happens to the wives if he does this all the time?" said Taka uneasily.

"Most of the time they're just discarded because the Ninja Lord is dissatisfied with his sons' less than romantic initial interactions with them." Fuji said.

"Well…uh…" Choutarou glanced back over at the ninjas who were still standing there looking totally serious. Then he looked back at Fuji and Oishi and lowered his voice to a whisper. "Is there any way to get rid of those guys?"

Fuji leaned over and called out to the ninjas, "Leave us!"

"Of course." they said as they dashed out of the door faster than the speed of light.

"Well that was easy." Taka said.

Choutarou and Taka sat down as well and began explaining the plan that Inui had set forth.

"It's not that hard." Said Taka. "The ninjas will take the two of us back to the prison before the sun goes down, and then they'll take us out again when the sun comes up again so you would THINK there would be no time for Ootori to be under the moonlight. So Inui came up with this plan. Do you have a piece of paper so I can draw some maps?"

"That's ridiculous." Said Fuji. "We'll just tell them that we don't want you to go back to the prisons, that's all."

Taka looked at Fuji. Then he looked at Oishi.

"Pretty much." Oishi said with a nod.

"Will that work?" Choutarou asked.

"Everyone here bows to our every whim." Said Fuji. "We are their Lord's Sons' wives. That essentially puts us on the same level as their Lord. We get whatever we want and when we want it."

"It sounds like you're enjoying yourself." Taka joked.

"I won't deny it." Fuji admitted.

Before anyone could respond, a dramatic sounding horn rang through the air so intensely that the room actually shook a bit. After a moment of waiting for the sound to die out, the quartet looked at each other.

"What was that?" Oishi asked.

"I couldn't say." Fuji said, standing up and going to the door.

Before he could open the door, however, the ninjas did it for him and they were standing there looking urgent.

"The Lord's Sons have returned!" one announced. "You must go out to greet them back from battle!"

"Oh, how valiant." Said Fuji, looking back at the other three, who hastily stood to see the commotion as well.

"The two of you wait here." Ordered the other ninja as he pointed at Choutarou and Taka.

"Um…okay…" they backed off before their lives could be threatened.

Oishi and Fuji then followed the remaining ninja who did not stay behind to make sure the man-slaves did not escape.

"The Lord's Sons…" Fuji began as they made their way down the halls. "Our husbands I suppose. Do you know them personally? What do they even look like?"

"You're about to meet them." the ninja reminded him.

"Can you blame me for being curious about the man I married last night?" Fuji sighed, looking despaired.

"Very well." Said the ninja. "Both are passionate about their work. The Elder is often…" He faltered a bit in searching for the correct word. "…Enthused."

"Enthused?" Fuji and Oishi repeated.

"At a loss for a better word." The ninja said.

"That's the one you're married too, right?" Oishi said.

"So I've been told." Fuji didn't look too psyched.

"The Younger is a bit…" The ninja, once again, searched for a good word. "Pretentious."

"Oh, yours is pretentious, Oishi." Fuji commented.

"So one is 'enthused' and the other is 'pretentious', but both are passionate about their work." Oishi reasoned.

"That's right." Said the ninja.

"Anything else you can tell us?" Fuji asked.

"Well, you're going to meet them right now." Said the ninja as they stopped in front of a door. The ninja gestured to the floor as he held the handle that would open the door.

"What?" said Oishi, looking at the floor.

"Bow to them, of course." Said the ninja. "They are the Lord's Sons!"

"Oh. I see." Said Fuji. He nodded at Oishi and then two of them got down on their knees and waited.

After a short pause, the ninja took a deep breath and swung the doors open.

There were six ninja standing there like a wall.

"Welcome back." Said the ninja holding the door.

The ninjas in the front then parted like the red sea to reveal two standing in the back, and it was quite clear to Fuji and Oishi right away that these two were the important ones.

They stepped forward in what seemed to be slow motion as Fuji and Oishi only waited. The Sons didn't look like they were going to say anything anytime soon as they pointed at Fuji and Oishi. They had such intense mask action on their face that only their eyes were hardly visible.

"Oh Great Sons!" exclaimed the ninja escort as he threw himself to the ground and bowed very deeply so his face practically touched the floor. "It is my pleasure to introduce you to the women your father married you to while you were away!"

The two Sons still did not speak, nor did they move.

"You'd think they'd be used to it if it happens all the time." Oishi whispered to Fuji. But of course whispering was sort of pointless considering everyone was standing around them.

"Well, I suppose we should—" Fuji began as he stood up and realized he was quite taller than the two Sons. "Hm…yeah…"

Oishi stood up as well, and the Sons only continued to point and stare at them.

"Perhaps it would be best if you all just went back to your room!" suggested the escort ninja as he stood up and gently began pushing his superiors in the direction of the room.

They started walking and everyone was being quiet. Fuji and Oishi then began to notice that the two Sons were walking more slowly in attempt to separate themselves. Soon, the males were a good ten paces behind the females, and then they engaged in whispering banter back and forth that sounded somewhat excited and somewhat disturbed and even somewhat relieved.

"This is getting a little annoying." Oishi said to Fuji.

"I agree." Fuji said as he stopped walking.

Oishi stopped walking as well, but apparently the two Sons hadn't noticed that they had both stopped walking so they ended up all crashing into each other. There was a mushroom cloud and everyone died.

But not really. That actually didn't happen.

There was some minor bumping and then everyone oriented themselves.

"All right, listen up." Fuji said. "The two of us have just been forced to marry you last night and we know you're not that excited about the deal either. So why don't we all just divorce each other and call it a day?"

The Sons looked at each other and then nodded.

"Well, before we call it a day…" said one of the Sons as they started taking off his mask. "We want to ask you some questions."

"Some…questions?" Oishi said nervously.

"Yeah…" the Son said. "For one…I could have sworn you two were boys before."

Both of the Sons removed their masks.

"Ohhh…" said Oishi and Fuji at the same time.


	52. Defeat Who?

Channel 52- Defeat…Who?

"And it is with great honor and great pride that I now dub you official… NINJAS IN TRAINING!" said a high ranked ninja as he stood before Hiyoshi, Eiji, Kirihara, Momo and Shishido.

"Ninjas in TRAINING?" Momo demanded, but Hiyoshi hit him over the head to remind him to shut up.

"Here is your new ninja attire." Said the ninja as he gestured towards a few stacks of black clothing. "Your first training mission will be tomorrow morning with the honored Sons of our Lord so be sure to be ready and be punctual."

"Is there any chance we could have our weapons back?" Kirihara asked.

"You may have them back in the morning." Said the ninja. "It is best that you arrange to speak with our Lord's Sons as soon as possible."

Pretty much AS he was saying that, a gust of wind flew by. Everyone turned to see what had just gone by them, but were then distracted by Fuji and Oishi who were in hot pursuit of the blurs that had disappeared in the distance.

"Don't mind us!" said Oishi as they hurried by.

"Oishi, you're a star!" Eiji said, giving him the thumbs up.

Oishi only turned a moment to glare at Eiji but then continued chasing.

Meanwhile, down in the prison, they had seriously run out of things to talk about.

"So then Tachibana was all…guys, don't fight back." Said Kamio. "It was wild. You should have been there to feel all the…" He paused. "The…"

He looked at Shinji.

"Good vibes?" Shinji tried.

"Sure, yeah!" said Kamio. "Good vibes! We all had good vibes."

"Good vibes." Atobe said. "That's ALL you exchanged?"

Oshitari slapped him five and Kamio fumed.

"HEY!" he said. "Say what you want about me, but leave Tachibana alone and definitely don't try to defile a very emotional time in our tennis lives!"

"Uh…huh." Said Atobe with an unconvinced nod.

"What is this?" said Inui suddenly as he stood up and adjusted his glasses while looking at his remote. "The number has suddenly decreased to eleven."

"How?" said Atsushi. "No one came in."

"YUUSHI!" yelled someone quite suddenly.

Oshitari turned to see Gakuto standing right there dressed in all black ninja clothes. Oddly enough, he was standing inside the cell and, even after Inui checked the door, he found it still to be locked.

"Gakuto…you're here." Oshitari commented as Gakuto ran over to him and hugged him like it was his job.

"That would explain the sudden descent in the number." Inui said. "Well, actually, that would explain it if it the number was a twelve. Who is else here?"

"Oh my GOD, all you guys are here!" came another voice. They all spun around to see Jirou standing outside the cell, also dressed in all black. "Oh my god it's my teammates…"

He leaned up against the cell bars and reached his arms through, flailing them like an idiot.

"Jirou AND Gakuto." Atobe commented. "Not bad."

"Ahem…so ANYWAY, Gakuto…" said Oshitari, trying to pry Gakuto away from him.

"No way!" said Gakuto. "I've been in this random ninja world for like three weeks now and there's no way I'm letting go of you now!"

He reached out and grabbed Atobe and pulled him as well.

"Big Hyoutei group hug!" he exclaimed gleefully.

"NO, Gakuto." Said Atobe as if it was an order to give a dog as he booted Gakuto away from them.

Gakuto landed on his arse and looked dejected.

It was then that the door opened and Fuji and Oishi descended into the prison, looking around quizzically.

"Well, I guess you all know now." Said Oishi, gesturing towards Gakuto and Jirou. Then he paused. "Wait, how did he get inside the cell?"

"I was just starting to wonder that myself." Ryou said, observing this as well.

"I ninjaed in!" said Gakuto. "I'm a ninja after all. I can do that."

"Well can you ninja the door open?" Oshitari asked.

"Hm…probably…" Gakuto said.

"But don't." Jirou said.

"Why?" said everyone.

"Because we'd get in trouble." Jirou whined. "Freeing the prisoners and all. We're not supposed to do that, especially as sons of the Ninja Lord, even if it's just the fake sons."

"Very funny." Said Atobe. "Now I order the both of you to open this door."

"No." Inui said. "It is best to stick to our current plan because after all…"

Inui suddenly stopped.

"Wait, you two are the sons of the Ninja Lord?" he said.

"Yeah." Said Gakuto as he suddenly appeared outside the cell. "So?"

"You two aren't brothers." Said Kaidou as if that's what Inui was trying to get at.

"I know, there's not enough time between our birthdays but we didn't really start nitpicking over that considering we're in a NINJA world." Said Gakuto, putting his hands on his hips.

"Wait." Said Inui again. "So you two are the Sons of the Ninja Lord? And last night Fuji and Oishi…"

He pointed at said teammates.

"…Married the Sons of the Ninja Lord." He finished.

Everyone chose to remain silent.

"It wasn't OFFICIAL." Said Oishi quietly.

Once again, everyone shared a good laugh at Fuji and Oishi. And this time, they also got to laugh at Jirou and Gakuto.

But Jirou was in quite good spirits. "That's so funny!" he said. "Our fake dad married us to two boys posing as girls while we were gone! Joke's on US!"

"No, Jirou." Said Atobe, slapping his forehead.

"Let's all take a moment to relax and explain the situation to Jirou and Gakuto." Inui offered as he sat down.

"I am getting rather tired of hearing this speech." Said Ryoma.

"You haven't even heard it nearly as many times as SOME of us have." Said Oshitari.

After the story, Jirou suddenly sprung to his feet.

"WHAT?" he yelled. "So I'm ACTUALLY married to Fuji?"

"Assuming your fake father's authority has validity." Inui said.

"It does." Gakuto said regrettably.

"I feel DIRTY!" Jirou cried.

"Don't worry, I'm not psyched about it either." Said Fuji but he certainly looked as though he couldn't care less.

"And guys, I just realized that we left Taka and Ootori back in the monastery place." Oishi sighed. "They're probably wondering where we went."

"Ug…I feel all dirty…" Jirou continued to chant as he walked around trying to shake it off.

"How much longer until nighttime anyway?" said Atsushi. "So Ootori can get his powers back and subsequently break us out of this prison and subsequently help us complete the mission with gets us to the next Universe?"

"Ootori gets powers at night?" said Gakuto, looking impressed.

"No." said Oshitari. "It's a bit of a long story, but in short, he has powers all the time, but recently lost them and the only way to get them back is to get under the actually light of the moon."

"Oh, that's a bummer." Said Gakuto. "It's going to rain tonight. The sky'll probably be covered in clouds."

"That's a lie." Said Atobe, grabbing Gakuto's collar through the bars and pulling him right up close, glaring at him threateningly. "You're lying so stop right now."

"I'm not lying!" said Gakuto frantically.

"But I bet we could get you guys out of here before then anyway!" said Jirou, waving his arms around for attention. "We'll just talk to the Ninja Lord and see what we can do. I'm sure if we ask nicely he'll say all right!"

"He better." Said Atobe, letting go of Gakuto.

"He will!" said Gakuto, fixing his collar. "Don't worry about it!"

"Oh my goddd…" said Jirou with a whine. "Can you believe that we just got back from a mission like a couple of hours ago and we already have to go on another one tomorrow morning?"

"Why?" Kamio asked.

"Because." Gakuto frowned. "We have to take the New Recruits on their training mission."

"Hold that thought." Inui ordered as he drew all the attention to himself and pointed at the remote. "Look. We're receiving our task for this Universe."

"What's it say?" Gakuto asked.

"It says…" Inui began, looking the remote over. He paused. "That can't be right."

"Why?" said Atobe, leaning over.

"It says _Defeat Atobe Sutefuani_." Inui said.

Everyone was silent.

"What?" said Gakuto. "Is that like your mom or something, Atobe?"

"That can't be right." Said Ryoma. "That was the mission in the Universe you guys got me in."

"I hope this thing didn't get a glitch." Said Inui. "After all, it was in the hands of ninjas for a day. There's no telling what they did with it."

"You got something against ninjas?" said Jirou as he did that annoying snapping thing, but everyone ignored him.

"And, in response to your earlier question, Gakuto…" said Atobe. "No. She is not my mother. She is not related to me in any way, shape or form."

"So it's just a coincidence that she has the same name as you?" said Gakuto.

"Well, actually, it was this complicated Mary-Sue Universe…" Oshitari started.

"Enough said." Said Gakuto, putting his hand up. "That's all the information I needed."

"Hey guys…" Oishi said, looking guilty. "We left Taka and Ootori waiting for us…"

"Oh yeah." Said Fuji with a nod.

Meanwhile…

"So…seen any good movies lately?" Choutarou asked.

Taka stared at him.

Choutarou waited.

"No." Taka said finally.

"Oh." Said Choutarou. "Why not?"

Taka stared at him.

Choutarou waited.

"Because I've been bouncing around to various Universes for the past three weeks." Taka said finally.

"Oh." Said Choutarou. "Me too."

The conversation pretty much ran completely dry at that point.

Thankfully, they were rescued by the entrance of the newlyweds, AKA Fuji, Oishi, Gakuto and Jirou.

"Ootori, you're here too!" said Gakuto.

"Gakuto!" said Choutarou, jumping to his feet. "Jirou! What a great surprise!"

"You missed out on the big Hyoutei group hug!" said Jirou.

"Aw…" said Choutarou, looking legitimately disappointed.

"That so just doesn't even matter." Said Fuji, glaring slightly.

"It might matter to US!" said Gakuto.

"Instead of starting in on the glaring and mean spirited comments, let's just get right to getting out of here!" said Taka.

"That's the spirit!" cheered Jirou.

"We got the mission, by the way." Oishi said to Choutarou and Taka.

"Oh?" said Taka. "What was it?"

"We have to defeat Atobe Sutefuani." Said Oishi. "Again."

"Yeah, I was about to say…didn't we already do that?" Choutarou looked confused.

"That's what we were saying too." Said Oishi with a sigh.

"So what does that mean?" said Taka. "What do we do?"

"Yeah, I mean she's already dead so we can't defeat her again…" Choutarou pointed out.

"So it looks like we're stuck here until we get a REAL mission." Said Gakuto.

"Sucks for everyone in the prison." Jirou frowned.

"What do you mean?" said Gakuto. "It sucks for us too because now we have to go on another New Recruit mission!"

"Oh yeah that too." Said Jirou, looking depressed.

"It sucks for us as well because it prolongs our unfortunate current physical states." Fuji added.

"It essentially sucks for ALL of us." Said Taka.

"Oh, and by the way," Oishi said to Gakuto and Jirou. "The New Recruits? They're more of us."

"More Hyoutei?" said Gakuto, his eyes shining.

"Hiyoshi, Shishido, Eiji, Kirihara and Momo." Fuji counted off his fingers.

"Yes!" said Jirou. "That HAS to make Hyoutei the majority!"

"Actually, with your recent arrivals, it makes Hyoutei even with Seigaku." Fuji said, crossing his arms.

"Seigaku's ALWAYS been the majority or in a tie with Hyoutei." Said Taka. "Then we have a bunch of miscellaneous people from other teams too."

Gakuto and Jirou were both standing there with raised eyebrows and just as they were about to start cheering for Hyoutei, they were thankfully interrupted by a bunch of ninjas entering.

"Sons of Our Honored Lord!" exclaimed the one in the front as they all bowed to the presence of the great ones. "Your Father has sent us to inquire as to whether or not you are satisfied with your new wives."

Jirou and Gakuto looked at each other and then at Fuji and Oishi.

They looked like they were at a loss for words.

"Well, yes of course." Oishi urged.

"…Yes…" they both said in unison.

The ninjas didn't look convinced.

"You are…certain?" said the one in the front.

"They adore us." Said Fuji.

"It's true!" said Jirou. "Now leave us alone!"

"Yes!" said the ninjas as they all bowed again and ran out.

Everyone was quiet for a few seconds before Jirou turned to Fuji.

"Just for the record," he said. "I don't REALLY adore you."

"Shut up." said Fuji as he bitch slapped Jirou.


	53. Types

Channel 53- Types

Fuji, Oishi and Taka were chillaxing in the room that had been given to them. They could hear the rain hitting the roof, and looked quite mopey.

Suddenly, the doors open and Choutarou trudged in, drenched head to toe.

"Well?" said Fuji.

"No, it's still raining…" he reported. "And it's still cloudy."

"No moon then." Oishi sighed.

"And it looks like Gakuto and Jirou are leaving with Shishido and the others soon. I hope they don't run into any trouble on the way. And I hope the rain doesn't pick up…I wouldn't want them to catch colds…"

"Enough, it's three in the morning…" Taka said, looking like he was ready to fall asleep at any point in time.

"The sooner Ootori gets his powers back, the sooner we can release everyone else from the prison." Fuji said.

"I don't know about waiting another day until I get my powers back." Choutarou said, looking depressed as he went where everyone else was sitting.

"Keep in mind, Ootori, that you didn't have powers for the first thirteen years of your life." Oishi pointed out. "It's only a recent development that's only about three weeks old."

"Actually, it's officially been twenty-two days." Choutarou said.

"I said ABOUT three weeks." Oishi reminded him.

"On the bright side, we only have eleven more people to get." Taka said.

"That is not a bright side." Said Fuji.

"Why?" said Taka.

"Because that's still eleven more people." Fuji answered. "As opposed to NONE." Fuji abruptly stopped and looked at Choutarou. "You're dripping all over me. Go away."

"Where am I supposed to go?" Choutarou whined.

"Outside." Said Fuji, pointing at the door.

"It's raining!" Choutarou said.

"The skies might open up for a moment and if you're in here then you'll miss your chance." Fuji pointed out.

"I'm tired though…" Choutarou shivered. "And cold."

"Stop arguing with me." Fuji ordered.

Choutarou looked defeated, so he lowered his head and sadly left the room.

Meanwhile, outside in the rain…

"Listen up Ninja Recruits!" Jirou said as he paced in front of our five ninjas-in-training as they looked less than enthusiastic to accept orders from him. Gakuto stood by and looked pleased with their authority over them, and the only reason this authority was being perpetuated was because there was a handful of ninjas native to the Universe standing by to make sure the ninjas in training did not step out of line in the presence of their Lord's Sons.

"Oh come on, it's not even light outside yet…" Momo yawned.

"Yes, and keep in mind that the heavy rains we are currently experiencing make it impossible to see any of the moon whatsoever so you all know what THAT means." Said Gakuto.

"Poo." Said the five recruits.

"Okay, so what's the point of getting up at three AM to just talk about pointless stuff?" Kirihara whined a little bit.

"Our mission begins today!" Jirou answered.

"Mission?" their eyes lit up.

"Not THAT mission." Said Jirou.

"Aww…"

"Our mission is to travel to the Tower of Gharinhal." Jirou said.

"Where-in-hall?" Shishido repeated with a raised eyebrow.

"Be quiet, all of you!" ordered one of the native ninjas since he was sick of hearing them question their ways as of yet.

"What he said!" said Gakuto. "The next person who speaks out of turn will be thrown in prison!"

This got everyone quiet.

"All right, that's better." Said Gakuto. "Continue, Jirou."

"Thank you, Gakuto." Said Jirou. "We will travel to the Tower of Gharinhal which is just on the other side of the forest south of the monastery."

"Once there, we will meet up with Lord Quentin." Gakuto added. "He is a neutral party in the war and is generally gracious to accept us."

"Generally?" Eiji repeated, but then he quickly closed his mouth.

"Yes, generally." Gakuto replied. "This is his tenth and final day of mourning over the recent loss of his daughter."

"We are going to show our respects to Lord Gharinhal and hope to negotiate a treaty that would take him off the neutral list and onto the ally list." Jirou said.

"Keep in mind that this is normally a mission we would have no problem completing without any of you," Gakuto went on. "And this is also your training mission for us to see the full extent of your abilities. So we have a message for you…"

"Don't fall behind." They said together.

Then they gave each other a high five.

"They're enjoying this too much." Said Hiyoshi under his breath.

"We will now return your weapons to you." Said Jirou as he picked up a bag that was on the ground. "Ninja-In-Training Shishido. Here is your utility belt and fruity skin tight silver costume."

"WHAT did you just say?" Shishido demanded and when he was JUST about to wreck havoc on them when the others held him back, since they had happened to notice that the other ninjas had all made a grab for their weapons.

"Just ignore them!" Momo advised.

"Ninja-In-Training Momoshiro." Jirou continued, taking more stuff out of the bag. "Your sword."

Momo took the sword and waited.

Jirou just stood there looking like he was done.

"That's it?" Momo said.

"Yes." Said Jirou. "Everything else that was taken off your person was dubbed non-lethal."

"Well I don't JUST want my sword." Said Momo. "What about my telescope? It's not a weapon, but it's useful!"

"Oh yes." Gakuto leaned in. "The telescope, right. Well, we decided that it really WAS useful so I keep it on my person at all times."

He pulled out Momo's telescope from his ninja pack.

"Hey!" said Momo. "That's mine! Let's trade the sword and the telescope!"

"Sorry, no can do." Said Gakuto with a sigh. "I am a strictly Scouting and Close Combat-Type Ninja."

"What?" said everyone.

Gakuto gave a heavy sigh. "I am a Scouting and Close Combat-Type Ninja." He repeated. "Jirou is a Strategic and Combat-Type Ninja. Shishido, what we gathered from your tests and weapons was that you were a Close Combat and Multi Weapon Type-Ninja. Momo, you're a Brute Strength and Sword-Type Ninja. It's not THAT hard to understand."

"Well keep in mind that you haven't explained any of that to us." Hiyoshi reminded them.

"Ninja-In-Training Hiyoshi." Said Jirou, handing Hiyoshi his wand. "We established that you are a Close Combat-Type Ninja. Here is the stick we found."

"That seems about right." Said Hiyoshi who had a very mediocre reaction. As you just saw.

"So he gets his stick but I don't get my telescope?" Momo demanded.

"Why would I want the stick?" said Gakuto with a raised eyebrow.

"It's not a stick." Said Hiyoshi. "It's my wand."

"Your wand?" said EVERYONE.

"Yes." Said Hiyoshi, looking violated. "God damn it."

"Whatever, let's just move on." Gakuto urged Jirou.

"Ninja-In-Training Kikumaru." Said Jirou. "We established that you are a Scouting-Type Ninja. Here is your knife."

"Scouting?" said Eiji. "That's all? That's so useless!"

"Well, it didn't come from nowhere." Said Gakuto with a slight cough.

"That was uncalled for!" said Eiji sadly as he took his butter knife.

"And finally, Ninja-In-Training Kirihara." Said Jirou. "You are a Mounted Multiple Weapons-Type Ninja. Here are your numerous guns, sticks of dynamite, rope and various other little things that we found. And your horse is behind the monastery with the other horses."

"Separated from the male ones, I hope." Kirihara said.

"What?" said Jirou.

"I hope my horse isn't with the male horses." Kirihara repeated. "Because she's a girl, and apparently she's quite flirtatious and promiscuous."

"Wait, you're talking about a horse, right?" said Gakuto.

"Stop obsessing over your horse!" Momo ordered.

"Yeah, what the hell?" said Gakuto. "It's just a horse."

"She's not JUST a horse." Said Kirihara. "She's my horse and I'm just looking out for her well being!"

"Don't you have any friends?" said Hiyoshi with a raised eyebrow.

Kirihara took a moment to before he answered, and then he bowed his head in shame. "No." he said finally.

"Aw, it's okay, Kirihara, WE'LL be your friends!" Eiji cheered as he hugged Kirihara.

"No, no, that's enough, NO HUGGING!" ordered the ninjas who were obviously homophobic.

"Well, in response to your question, Kirihara." Said Gakuto. "No, we did not separate your horse from the male ones."

"Aw man." Said Kirihara, looking defeated.

"Listen up, New Recruits!" said Jirou after everyone had calmed down. "We're going to leave very soon!"

Jirou looked at Gakuto who nodded.

"Okay, we're leaving right now." Jirou revised his statement.

"This is lame." Shishido sighed.

"We can take it from here." Said Gakuto to the random ninjas who nodded and ran off.

"Oh good!" said Momo. "I thought for a second that we were going to have to actually go on the mission."

"We DO." Said Gakuto. "And I have half a mind to slap you across the face for speaking out of turn!"

"Gakuto, I have sort of a random question." Eiji said. "Is Oishi a good wife?"

"That's it!" said Gakuto as he grabbed Eiji's collar and proceeded to slap him across the face, but of course Eiji retaliated since he obviously had pent up anger against Gakuto for having the fortune of being married to Oishi.

"How long is this going to go on for…?" Jirou whined.

"Break it up, break it up!" Momo ordered as he got in between the flippy doubles playing bitches and separated them. They swung at each other wildly, and the others decided to join in on restraining them.

"I get the feeling that this is going to be a very long mission." Said Hiyoshi with a sigh.


	54. Butterflies

Channel 54- Butterflies

"We have seriously been walking ALL DAY and I am bored!" whined Eiji. "My feet hurt…"

It was about midday now, and everyone was trudging along. Except for Gakuto and Jirou of course who looked as though they could walk for another three days without being bothered. And Kirihara… but he was riding his horse.

"Stop whining!" said Gakuto. "It's bad enough that everyone thinks YOU'D actually make a good ninja."

"And what's THAT supposed to mean?" Eiji demanded, putting his hands on his hips.

"It means that I am offended that they think you are ninja material." Gakuto crossed his arms. "Let alone the same type of ninja as I am."

"I thought you were a Scouting AND Close Combat." Said Shishido.

"Well my Primary is Scouting." Gakuto retorted.

"Why are you offended?" said Hiyoshi. "It's not like you're ACTUALLY a ninja."

"Why are you talking like that?" Gakuto said. "It's annoying."

"HA!" said Eiji, pointing at Gakuto. "You're jealous of me!"

"I am NOT jealous of you!" said Gakuto.

"You ARE jealous!" said Eiji. "Because you came to this Universe in which you're supposed to be a ninja, and I just popped in and they said that I'm on the same level as you even though I'm not a ninja!"

"My head hurts." Said Jirou, looking at Eiji.

"You..." said Gakuto. "On the same level…AS ME?"

"That's what I said." Said Eiji. "Probably better, actually."

"No way." Said Gakuto. "Your acrobatics are laughable in tennis so why you believe you are better at NINJAING than me…"

"Face it Gakuto." Said Momo for the sole purpose of provoking Gakuto. "Eiji IS better than you."

"No way!" said Gakuto as he stopped walking. "We are going to have a Ninja Competition right now!"

"Right now?" Jirou said. "We're almost at the Tower of Gharinhal though."

"Can we go ahead?" Kirihara asked.

"This can't wait." Gakuto said as he put down his backpack and whipped out some ninja stars.

Eiji stared at him.

"I don't have any ninja stars." Eiji said as he pulled out his butter knife. "All I have is this butter knife."

"Well you should have thought of that BEFORE you challenged me to a Ninja Competition!" Gakuto said.

"YOU challenged ME!" Eiji reminded him.

"Enough talk!" said Gakuto. "We're going to start—"

He was unable to continue because a giant net that had been hidden under the leaves suddenly sprung. Eiji, Gakuto, Shishido, Momo and Hiyoshi all happened to be standing on it and therefore they were all thrown together and suspended in the air, all tangled up in the net. Jirou had jumped back away just in the nick of the time, and luckily Kirihara had been out of range because we all know what sort of troubles might have occurred if the horse had gone up into the net as well.

There was a slight pause as everyone remained in the net, while Jirou and Kirihara just stared at them.

"Gakuto…" Jirou began.

"I KNOW." Said Gakuto, sounding annoyed.

Shishido decided to take matters into his own hands so he took his spear out of his utility belt and cut the rope.

Unfortunately, he neglected to tell anyone this, so they all plummeted to the ground and landed on their arses, except for Shishido who landed gracefully since he was prepared.

"Ow my arse…" said Momo as he stood up and rubbed his arse.

"That was so foolish." Said Gakuto, standing up and pointing at Eiji who was still attempting to collect himself. "I blame you."

"Who do you think—" Eiji started but Jirou suddenly shushed everyone.

"Guys, I think we're here." Jirou said as he pushed some branches aside to reveal a giant tower standing before them. The tower was so tall that even as they all looked up and shielded their eyes from the rain, they still couldn't see the top.

They all stared at it in silent wonder for a little while, before Momo started making those noises that suggested he was going to start laughing, but trying to stop himself.

"What?" said Hiyoshi finally.

"Do you think…" Momo started. "That Lord What's-His-Face was compensating for something when he built this?"

Shishido hit him upside the head. "Stop saying that!" he said, getting annoyed WAY too fast. "Or else I'm going to start to think that YOU'RE compensating for something!"

"That doesn't make sense." Said Kirihara as he got off his horse.

"All right, guys," said Gakuto. "You'll address him as Lord Quentin and remember to be very respectful!"

"Not only are we trying to gain his allegiance, but he's also in the tenth day of mourning the death of his only daughter." Jirou added.

"Was she a ninja too?" asked Eiji.

"We've really only heard rumors about how she died." Jirou admitted. "We heard that she was in the middle of training when twelve mysterious strangers showed up with ambitions to kill her, and despite her extensive ninja and sorcery, they managed to defeat her."

The others were silent.

"Sorcery?" Kirihara raised an eyebrow.

"Yes," said Jirou.

"Lord Quentin's wife was a Sorceress." Gakuto explained. "But she disappeared ten years ago when Lord Quentin's daughter was only two years old."

"Which is just fine since the ninjas condone sorcery." Jirou said with a sigh.

"But don't bring any of this up to Lord Quentin!" Gakuto warned. "Just act respectfully towards him and hopefully we'll be in and out of here in before the sun sets!"

"GOT IT!" exclaimed everyone, giving Gakuto the thumbs up.

As they started walking towards the tower, Momo leaned over to Eiji.

"Is it just me," he began. "Or was that story kind of familiar?"

"What do you mean?" Eiji said, looking puzzled. "In what way?"

"Never mind." Said Momo. "Maybe I'm imagining things."

"Maybe." Said Eiji. "It's not like we've ever been in this Universe before."

"Sh!" Gakuto hissed to the group as they approached the enormous door and used the enormous knocker. And, as everyone stood and waited for Lord Quentin to answer the door, they had to stop and wonder if maybe Momo was right in his theory. No, not the one about the familiar story, but the one about maybe Lord Quentin compensating for something.

The door swinging open stifled their laughter and their faces switched to solemn as the Lord of the Tower stood before them with a long face. Not literally, but figuratively.

"Good day Lord Quentin," said Gakuto with a bow.

"Please accept our condolences on the recent loss of your daughter." Said Jirou.

"And excuse the company, they are currently in training." Gakuto added.

"Thank you, Sons of the Ninja Lord." Said Lord Quentin. "Please come in."

Lord Quentin led the small group into his Tower. They passed by many rooms and many portraits as the tall Lord just talked about random things that only Jirou and Gakuto seemed to find interesting.

"Say," said Hiyoshi randomly as he came to a stop in front of one of the portraits. "Who is this?"

"Ah, that is my daughter." Said Lord Quentin, coming back to admire the picture.

"I'm sorry." Said Hiyoshi. "She was very beautiful."

"Yes, she was." Said Lord Quentin with a sigh.

This comment interested the others as they sneaked over as well.

At first, no one really said anything.

"You know," said Shishido. "No matter how I look at it…"

"No I agree." Said Kirihara. "That's definitely her."

"What was your daughter's name?" Eiji asked.

"The meaning of her name was 'perfect in every way'." Lord Quentin said in fond remembrance of his daughter. "Sutefuani."

"Aha…" said Kirihara, Shishido, Eiji and Momo as they looked at each other uneasily.

"Moving on." Said Lord Quentin as he walked away, expecting them all to follow him.

"What was that all about?" Gakuto demanded of them.

"That girl is Atobe Sutefuani!" said Momo, pointing at the portrait.

"The Mary-Sue?" Hiyoshi questioned.

"Yeah." Said Momo.

"That doesn't make any sense." Said Gakuto.

"Well, hang on…" said Eiji as he started counting days on his fingers. After a few seconds of pondering and waiting, he stopped. "Twelve people killed her? There were twelve of us when we killed her. And that was ten days ago, I'm pretty sure."

"YOU GUYS killed Lord Quentin's daughter?" Jirou gasped.

"It was our mission!" Eiji said defensively.

"And apparently it's our mission in this Universe as well." Said Shishido with a sigh as he looked at the portrait.

"But if she's already dead…" Gakuto started just as Lord Quentin reentered.

"I have something I want to show you all." He said.

Hastily, they followed after him into a large circular room with a giant orb in the middle of it.

"What's this?" asked Kirihara.

"My wife, the sorceress, left this orb for my daughter." Said Lord Quentin. "It gave my daughter unlimited power to do whatever she wished. She even had the ability to transcend Universes and, if she so pleased, to preserve a small portion of her soul within it."

They stared at him blankly.

"She foretold her own death," Lord Quentin went on. "And she told me that on the tenth day after she died, she would return to me to avenge herself on the ones who had killed her."

More blank stares, except now the stares were a vain attempt to just look confused instead of guilty.

"She also informed me as to who her killer was." Lord Quentin said, his voice elevating to an angry tone. And then he looked at Jirou. "YOUR WIFE."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa…" said Jirou. "When you say WIFE, you have to understand that—"

Before anyone could say anything else, the orb suddenly started glowing and hundreds of tiny golden shimmering butterflies swarmed about the room.

"This is SO Mary-Sue." Said Momo as if that was something that people say.

All the butterflies came together and formed a human shape.

"My daughter!" Lord Quentin called as the butterflies merged into one human and, as they lowered to the ground, the features of the human took form. The emerald eyes, the pale digits, the waist length silver hair and the golden bandana were all there. And clothes too, of course. Because the butterflies can provide that sort of thing for her.

"It IS her!" gaped Kirihara.

"Father, thank you for waiting for me to come." Said Sutefuani. "I can now avenge myself. Where is the one that killed me?"

"Not here," said Lord Quentin.

"Well then," said Sufefuani as she looked at the group. "I recognize a few of you. I will take care of you all first, and then find the one that killed me!"

"Wait, how did you get to the other Universe?" said Eiji, looking confused.

"You think that, with all my power, I would be unable to travel from Universe to Universe whenever I please?" laughed Sutefuani.

"Fair enough…" Eiji shrugged.

"Looks like we'll be able to complete our mission after all!" said Jirou as he whipped out some ninja stars from his pack.

"This could be interesting!" Gakuto agreed, striking a battle pose.

"Look out, she has magic powers!" Eiji warned as he took out his butter knife and held it out to protect himself.

"And Shishido, please try to avoid making out with her again." Momo said.

"Shut up!" said Shishido as he pulled his spear out of his utility belt. He really likes that spear.

"This time I'll get to do something instead of needlessly sacrifice myself." Said Kirihara.

As everyone charged at Sutefuani, Hiyoshi only stood there and watched. She was bettering their combined effort to harm her, and was almost toying with them.

Slowly, Hiyoshi removed his wand from his pocket.

He paused.

He pointed his wand at Sutefuani.

"Everyone, move for a second," he said vaguely.

The others looked at him, and then took a step back.

"_AVADA KADABRA." _Hiyoshi said calmly.

The light from his wand shot out and hit Sutefuani in the chest. She flew backwards in a dramatic fashion, and then landed on the ground.

No one reacted at first.

"Nice job, Hiyoshi." Shishido was the first to comment.

"Well, what can I say?" said Hiyoshi, pocketing his wand.

"My daughter!" screamed Lord Quentin as he ran over to her side. "She's dead! How could you?"

"Destroy this thing!" said Gakuto, pointing at the giant orb. "So she can't come back!"

"No, I won't allow it!" Lord Quentin yelled, jumping in front of the orb but Kirihara just hit him over the head with his gun so he crumpled to the floor, unconscious.

"This is just…SO EASY." Eiji commented as he drove his butter knife into the orb, causing it to explode with light, and then literally explode.

They all were flung against the wall after the aforementioned event occurred, and once the light disappeared, they were able to stand.

"WOW!" Jirou screamed. "SO COOL!"

"I would have preferred more notice before you did something like that." said Momo.

"I was in the moment!" Eiji announced.

"So…when do we go jumping to the next Universe?" Gakuto asked.

"We have to all get back together and be with the remote control that Inui has." Shishido answered.

"So…why are we still hanging around here?" Jirou said, jumping up immediately. "The last one to the monastery's a rotten egg!"


	55. Carried Out

Channel 55- Carried Out

With their vastly quicker pace, they were able to reach the monastery just as the sun began to set. Instead of reporting to the Ninja Lord about the outcome of the mission (because that would be a little foolish) they instead went right down to the prison where Inui and the gang were.

"We saw that you all completed the mission." Said Inui, showing that the remote said "Complete". "I must admit, I am curious."

"We'll explain later!" said Gakuto. "Just take us home."

"We'll be going to the next Universe, not straight home." Inui pointed out.

"Whatever!" said Gakuto. "Take us to the next Universe then!"

"I REALLY don't want our fake dad to find out how much we failed at that mission." Jirou said mournfully. "I feel so bad about what we did to poor Lord Quentin."

"I really think he was compensating for something with that Tower of his." Said Momo. "Did you see how much of a pussie he was acting like?"

"Momo, stop." Said Ryoma.

So then they all stood there.

"WHY AREN'T WE GOING?" demanded Gakuto.

"Because we're not all here." Inui reminded him.

"Who's not here?" said Hiyoshi, looking around.

Inui sighed very helplessly and depressedly in a way that suggested that he COULD have uttered "Why me?" had he decided to express himself that way. "Fuji, Oishi, Ootori and Taka." He said. "Remember?"

"Oh right." They all said.

"So that means we have to actually physically go inside of the monastery, which means we'll probably come in contact with other ninjas and have to explain ourselves." Jirou concluded.

"OR!" said Kirihara. "We could just throw some dynamite in the monastery, it would explode, therefore killing Fuji, Oishi, Ootori and Taka… and then we wouldn't have to meet up with them and they'd just come back to life in the next Universe."

"No way!" said Shishido. "We're not killing Choutarou!"

"As much sense as that makes," Inui admitted. "I think we should avoid blowing up Ninja Monasteries if at all possible."

"It was just a suggestion." Said Kirihara.

"What the hell?" said Gakuto. "I mean seriously."

"You guys are taking this too seriously." Said Atsushi. "You're not REALLY ninjas."

"Yeah but we've lived there for three weeks." Said Jirou. "It's like home now. We know a lot of the people in there and we don't want them to die pointlessly."

"I already said that we're not going to use the idea." Said Inui.

"And why are you in charge?" said Atobe. "I happen to think it's a good idea. It's the fastest and quickest way to do it."

"We're not killing Choutarou!" Shishido said firmly as if that was the only issue they were debating about.

"I was just brainstorming!" said Kirihara. "It's everyone else's fault for taking me seriously."

He crossed his arms childishly. It was obvious he wanted to use his stick of dynamite again.

"I know." Said Oshitari. "I could creep up to the window that the four of them are in and then shoot them all so they die. Then I could kill myself and you guys could go to the next Universe."

"Why do we have to kill each other?" Ryou whined.

"And I already said that we're not going to kill Choutarou!" said Shishido, sounding ever more persistent.

"Besides, Oshitari, it's not like you have your gun." Atobe pointed out.

"Oh right." Oshitari nodded. "Scratch that idea."

"We already scratched it!" said Shishido. "Because it involved killing Choutarou!"

"How about instead of going to the window and killing them, someone just goes to the window and knocks on it?" came Shinji as a voice of reason. "Then they just climb out the window, meet everyone else down here and then we leave?"

"You deserve applause for that one." Said Kamio.

"Why?" said Shinji. "It was completely obvious. Anyone who was thinking about something besides killing people could have thought of it."

"I'll go get them." Said Gakuto. "I'll be the most unnoticed of all of us."

"God speed, Gakuto." Said Jirou.

With that, Gakuto disappeared up the stairs and ran around the monastery. He was very ninja-esque about the way he was carrying himself. And yes, we forgot to mention for a little while that it was still raining, but it was, and as he reached the window and was about to knock on it, it suddenly got flung open. This caused Gakuto to nearly have a heart attack as he tumbled across the muddy ground in a less than graceful manner.

"It is STILL raining!" Choutarou exclaimed. "The sun will be setting in just a short while, but it's still going to be cloudy so the moon won't get its chance to come out!"

"ENOUGH!" said Gakuto as if he and Choutarou had been in an hour long argument.

His suddenly appearance, in turn, almost gave Choutarou a heart attack as well as he stumbled backwards and nearly landed on his rear.

"Gakuto, you nearly killed me!" said Choutarou, clutching his heart dramatically as he came back over.

Taka, Fuji and Oishi heard the commotion and came over the window to see Gakuto trying to brush himself off as he jumped up on the window sill.

"Back so soon?" Oishi said.

"Yeah," said Gakuto. "We finished the mission. We all just have to get together so we can go to the next Universe."

"All right," said Fuji. "Just bring all the others in here, and we'll be on our way."

Gakuto sat there on the window sill and stared at Fuji.

"Wait." He said. "Are you…" Gakuto eyed Fuji and stopped. Then he breathed slowly and started again. "Are you being serious?"

"Of course I'm being serious." Said Fuji.

"I think Gakuto just wants the four of us to go to them." Taka inferred.

"Why?" said Fuji.

"It would be easier that way." Taka shrugged.

"But that involves going outside in the rain." Sand Fuji. "And the dark. And the mud."

Everyone waited for Fuji to exclaim, "JK LOL!" but he didn't.

He just stood there looking totally stone faced as they all continued to wait for him to exclaim, "JK LOL!"

"All right, look." Said Gakuto. "They're all in prison, and there's like fifty of them. It makes more sense for the four of you to go to them."

"Well obviously." Said Choutarou.

"So what's the problem?" said Gakuto.

"There is no problem." Said Oishi. "Come on, Fuji. Once we get transported to the next Universe, you'll be all cleaned off."

"That's true…" Fuji sighed. "I guess I can deal with the few moments of horror."

"Here, I bet you could use this umbrella, anyway." Said Taka since he's always looking for ways to appease as many people as he can as he ran over to the corner of the room and picked up one of those paper umbrellas that are meant more to be decorative than to shield from the rain.

"This'll do." Fuji said as he opened up the umbrella.

Gakuto jumped back outside, and then Taka and Choutarou followed. They had to aid Fuji and Oishi over since they were smaller and weaker and were wearing elaborate dresses that vastly limited their movements.

They trudged through the rain until they finally reached the prison area and descended the stairs.

The prisoners threw a party of sheer joy because they were glad to finally get out of there.

"Choutarou, they were talking about plans that involved killing you, but I made sure that didn't happen." Said Shishido since he was obviously looking for a pat on the back.

"Thank you, Shishido!" said Choutarou as he hugged Shishido.

This was more than Shishido wanted (in public anyway) so he promptly pushed Choutarou away.

"A pat on the back would have sufficed!" he said, looking embarrassed.

Everyone was laughing at them on the inside.

"Oh wait, here it comes." Inui said as the white light started forming around them. Once again, they all cheered as Inui pressed the button that would teleport them to the next Universe.

And they were teleported to the next Universe.

They were standing on a large stone bridge over a moat that surrounded a giant castle that seemed to stretch in every which direction for miles.

After a bit of consideration of where they were, everyone gave heavy sighs of relief and stretched.

"Nifty!" said Jirou, looking down at his attire. "We get to stay ninjas!"

"I suppose things could be worse!" Gakuto agreed cheerfully.

"It's nice to be back in my own clothes!" said Eiji. Then he paused. "Well, I guess these aren't really my clothes. But just the clothes that I have recently gotten accustomed to."

"I'm just glad to finally get out of that prison." Said Atobe, lighting up a cigarette. But not smoking it.

"Yes, the prison really was getting quite tedious." Inui agreed, peering at the remote for any clues to their whereabouts. But he should know by now that that wasn't going to happen.

But, after about three seconds, about a thousand soldiers appeared out of nowhere and thrust their spears at the large group standing around foolishly in a clump.

"Don't move!" ordered the solider with the biggest feather in his helmet.

"How ironic." Said Kaidou, putting his hands up in the air. "If we end up in another prison…"

"Such strange garb!" said another soldier. "Shall we take them before our king?"

"Yes, I believe that would be best!" said the leader knight. "All of you! Come with us and cooperate or you will lose your heads!"

"We tasted the sweet air of freedom for only a few seconds…" Kirihara said.

"Do you think we can stall for a half an hour or something until the moon comes out?" Choutarou said, but that wasn't about to happen as they were prodded into the castle just short of the sunset.

"We're back in a Knight Universe." Said Taka to Inui. "This is the first repeat, isn't it?"

"There's got to be something different about this Universe." Said Inui.

"I would hate it if our Universe was unoriginal!" said Eiji to Taka.

"Bow before the king!" ordered the leader knight as he got to one knee after entering a very large room with a throne at the very end of a beautiful carpet.

Everyone decided that they enjoyed their heads being on their shoulders, so they got to a knee. The throne was so far away that they could hardly even see the king from where they were, but they could see a figure rise to his feet and start to advance towards them.

"Welcome to my castle," said the king.

The first one to say something was Fuji.

He got to his feet.

"I will not bow to this man."


	56. The King

Channel 56- The King

He sat at the head of the table, looking down at all his guests as they sat at the long table, Inui to his left. He curled a lock of hair around his finger under his kingly crown as they all stared at him in all his glory, chuckling cruelly under his breath at their unfortunate expense.

"So now there's only ten people to get." Inui explained, holding up the remote.

"Interesting," Mizuki commented.

"So where's Yuuta, Mizuki?" called Fuji from the far end of the table. He had been seated there quite purposely.

"Yuuta?" said Mizuki, perking up slightly. "Is he here?"

"That's what I'm asking YOU." Said Fuji, getting to his feet.

"What makes you think he is here with me?" Mizuki questioned.

"When is he NOT with you?" Fuji retorted.

"Unfortunately I do not know Yuuta's whereabouts." Mizuki sighed, putting both of his hands on the table. And then he started chuckling under his breath again.

"What are you laughing at now?" Fuji said.

"You." Mizuki answered. "You're a girl."

Fuji stopped moving entirely.

"Mizuki…" he said, sounding almost SWEET as he pushed his chair out of the way and started walking towards His Highness, but luckily Taka dove out from his seat and prevented him from doing anything that might get them thrown in another prison.

"While we're on that subject," Inui said as if they were on any subject at all. "Is there anyone else in this Universe that you know from our original Universe?"

Mizuki sighed. "Not to my knowledge." He replied. "But I haven't been outside the palace, so there might be someone on the outside. You know. A commoner."

"You're enjoying this too much." Said Atsushi.

"Wouldn't you?" Mizuki said.

"I guess we'll have to send out search parties." Inui said. "Because I get the feeling that there is at least another person in this Universe."

"What gives you that feeling?" asked Oishi.

"We haven't gotten our mission yet." Inui answered.

"That's all well and good," said Mizuki. "But it's nighttime now so—"

"Nighttime?" Choutarou suddenly exclaimed as he jumped up.

Everyone stared at him.

"…Yes…" Mizuki said slowly.

"I'll be right back." Said Choutarou as he darted off down the halls.

"Okay…" said everyone.

"Anyway," said Mizuki. "As I was saying, it's nighttime now. Why don't we all rest for the night? Then you can all search in the morning."

Fuji slammed his hand down on the table.

"I guess you've failed to notice, Mizuki, but I am a _girl_." He said.

"I think he did notice, Fuji." Eiji whispered. "After that comment he made earlier about you being a girl."

"Sit down, sit down." Mizuki offered, acting like a big hero. "Just think about it. Everyone else has been here for so long. What's another night?"

"You're only saying that because you're the king." Inui said.

"Maybe." Said Mizuki absentmindedly.

"Well, it has been a substantial amount of time since most of us last slept in a bed." Atobe said.

Just then, Choutarou strolled in.

"What was that all about?" Mizuki said.

"Um…nothing." Said Choutarou suspiciously as he took his seat back next to Shishido.

"You don't have to hide the fact that you're a superhero." Said Momo. "We all know. Well, except Mizuki. He didn't know."

"But he knows now." Taka pointed out.

"Super hero?" Mizuki looked a little impressed.

"You know…" said Shishido. "EVERYBODY wouldn't know if you guys didn't go around telling everyone that we came across."

"Shut up, Shishido." Said Atobe. "Both of you. We're trying to figure out what we're doing for sleeping arrangements, aren't we Mizuki?"

"There are four rooms in the Second Floor West Wing that you're all welcome to explore as you wish." Mizuki said.

"Four rooms?" said Atobe. "You are in the possession of an entire castle and you only have four rooms to offer us?"

"Yes." Said Mizuki, leaning over. "I think they will be sufficient. The rooms are quite sufficient. And…there are twenty of you. I like even numbers."

Mizuki certainly wasn't lying when he said the rooms were sufficient. The first door they opened revealed a very high ceiling and deep room with ten beds lining each side of the walls.

"Well?" said Mizuki.

"This will do." Atobe admitted, adjusting his collar.

"We will begin our search in the morning." Mizuki said. "I will send some servants early to make sure you are all…" he looked the group up and down. "Clean."

"Clean?" they all repeated.

But Mizuki decided he was above answering the question so he left.

"Okay, four rooms." Said Inui. "There are twenty beds in each room so theoretically we could all sleep in the same room but that seems ludicrous."

"We could split up according to teams." Said Kamio.

"Or we could do five people per room." Suggested Ryoma.

They all stared at each other and then there was a mad scramble for the rooms. A few people were stepped on and others were crushed, and it essentially came down to accommodating those crazy doubles players and then situating everyone else around them.

"All right, these beds are HUGE!" Jirou practically shrieked as he dove into one of the beds. He pretty much fell asleep as soon as he hit its soft cushiony wonder, snoring loudly.

"Well, I didn't expect THAT." Said Oshitari, taking off his trench coat and draping it over the edge of a bed.

"Actually, I'm pretty sure he didn't sleep at all the entire time we were in the Ninja Universe." Gakuto commented

"Too exciting?" Choutarou inferred.

"That's lame." Shishido decided.

The two doubles pairs of Hyoutei stood idly by.

"Sooo…" Oshitari said slowly.

"Are you sleeping there tonight, Yuushi?" Gakuto asked, gesturing towards the bed that had the trench coat draped over it.

"I guess." Said Oshitari. "It was pretty arbitrary. But why not?"

Gakuto jumped on the bed that was next to it. "I'll sleep here then." He said as he started emptying his secret ninja pockets and letting a plethora of weapons spill all over the place. Just when everyone thought he was done, he pulled more weapons out. It was very comical and cartoon-like.

He finally finished and looked satisfied.

"Much better!" he said.

"Yeah so…I guess Jirou's going to be sleeping there…" Choutarou observed. "I'll just sleep over here then!" He awkwardly sat down on one of the beds.

Then everyone stared at Shishido.

"What?" he said, crossing his arms.

"It's okay for you to want to sleep next to Ootori." Said Gakuto.

"WE'RE JUST FRIENDS!" Shishido yelled. Then he stomped off. "I'M SLEEPING WAY DOWN HERE!"

He went all the way to the very end of the hall, got under the covers and curled up into a tiny little dejected ball.

"Whoa." Said Oshitari.

"Oh Shishido." Said Choutarou with an endearing sigh.

Meanwhile!

"I can't believe MIZUKI is the king…" Fuji said as he grabbed the end of a bed and squeezed it so tightly it crumbled and turned to dust in his fist.

Everyone decided to take a step back, except for Taka who took it upon himself to make sure Fuji didn't kill anything else.

"It's all right, Fuji!" said Taka. "At least you're still better at tennis than he is!"

Fuji paused a moment and then nodded. "You're right, Taka, thank you." Fuji nodded contently.

The others gave a sigh of relief.

"But still…" Fuji went on. "I just KNOW Yuuta is here. My Yuuta Senses are tingling. Mizuki must be hiding him."

"The likelihood of Yuuta being here is actually quite high." Inui said.

"Why would you say that?" yelled the Golden Pair.

"Well, for the most part…" Inui said. "When people have been in groups of two, their partner made a little bit of sense."

"What about Kaidou and Kamio?" said Oishi. "That was pretty random. They're not even on the same team."

"And Hiyoshi and Shinji." Eiji added.

"I said for the most part." Inui said. "Did you miss it when I said for the most part?"

"Yeah, or I chose we chose to ignore you." Eiji said.

"Well, we know at least one other person has to be here because we haven't received the mission yet." Inui said. "There's no sense in thinking about it now though. Let's all just get some sleep and look for the other person in the morning."

They all doused the candles and got into bed.

It was silent for a little while.

Finally, Fuji's voice killed the silence with, "Are you saying that it makes more sense for Yuuta to be in the same area as Mizuki than with me?"

"Good night." Inui said as he pretended to be sleeping.

Meanwhile!

"Guys, underclassmen rock." Said Momo to Ryoma and Kaidou.

"Shut up." said Kaidou.

"Whatever." Said Ryoma.

"Underclassmen do NOT rock!" said Atsushi and Ryou since they were there as well.

"Why are they here?" Momo said, pointing at the twins.

"We're right here, you know." Said Atsushi. "We can hear you."

"I know." Said Momo. "That was my question…as to WHY you were here."

"Obviously because there has to be five people per room and if it wasn't THEM then it just would have been someone else." Said Ryoma.

"That makes enough sense." Momo shrugged.

"Oh just shut up." said Kaidou. "You sound stupider and stupider every time you open your mouth and it is really starting to get to me."

"Well if it bothers you so much then just go jump out that window over there." Momo suggested.

"What?" said Kaidou. "That doesn't make sense."

"It makes sense to ME." Said Momo as he jumped under the covers.

"Well then of course it would make sense if you're completely stupid." Said Kaidou as he got under his own covers.

The two of them sat there across from each other, glaring.

Ryou and Atsushi were in a similar argument over something petty like who took the last Mento that eventually caused them to break into song about how much better they were than the other person, making sure to point out every one of their faults.

Ryoma just stood there in the middle of the two arguments and he felt kind of like a tool because he wasn't arguing with anyone. But then again, it's totally justifiable for Ryoma to feel like a tool. Because, let's face it, Ryoma is a tool. Even if he IS the Prince of Tennis.

Meanwhile!

"I would rather start looking for someone else right away so we don't have to do this any longer." Atobe sighed as he took out a cigarette and lit it.

It sat there in his mouth as everyone stared at him.

"You ever think that maybe you're gray because you smoke?" Shinji asked.

Atobe could only blink in response.

"Okay, ONE," Atobe said. "I don't smoke. TWO, I'm not actually gray. And THREE, even if I DID smoke and I was ACTUALLY gray, any idiot knows that smoking would not turn me gray."

"He's got three very good points, Shinji." Kamio said.

"All right." Said Shinji. "It was just a shot in the dark."

"Well if you don't actually smoke, why do you always have that cigarette in your mouth?" Hiyoshi asked.

"Because it looks cool!" said Atobe. "It's part of my character to always have a cigarette in my mouth."

"Let me try." Kirihara ordered, holding out his hand.

"What?" said Atobe.

"I want to try. I want to see how cool I look." Kirihara clarified.

Atobe sort of didn't really know how to respond at first, and finally he took out his pack of cigarettes and handed one to Kirihara, and then handed him a light. Kirihara lit it up and put it in his mouth.

He waited.

"You know what?" said Kirihara with a slight nod. "I DO feel cooler."

"See?" said Atobe.

"You don't LOOK cooler." Said Shinji, rolling his eyes.

"Hey, I FEEL—" Kirihara started but he accidentally inhaled and proceeded to cough for about thirty-five minutes straight. He was about to die when he finally regained his composure.

"Okay…that was gross…" said Atobe, carefully taking the cigarette out of his mouth.

"I don't feel cool anymore…" Kirihara whined pathetically.


	57. Fairy Tale

Channel 57- Fairy Tale

Mizuki was sitting at the head of his gynormbously huge table all by himself, contently eating his equally gynormbously huge breakfast. It was quiet…too quiet. He started to wonder if the arrival of all those people who he remembered as being slightly familiar was actually just a dream.

But, of course, this assumption was immediately falsified when he heard the approach of an angry mob.

"Mizuki!" said the collective crossly.

Mizuki turned around to see his guests all standing before him, clothed in glorious majestic clothing that all seemed to fit them absolutely perfectly.

"Yes?" Mizuki said.

"I will handle this one." Atobe said as he walked around the table and placed his hand down. "We don't appreciate being forcibly awakened in the morning by strangers who overpower us and proceed to bathe us and then clothe us. We are quite capable of performing these morning necessities on our own."

Mizuki took a sip of his drink from his golden goblet.

"I see." He said. "Well. Those were my servants."

"We gathered that much." Kamio said.

"I just instructed them to treat you properly." Mizuki said.

"It was humiliating!" said Kirihara.

"Very well." Said Mizuki, standing up. "I will simply not indulge you all in future courtesies."

"But thanks for the clothes." Taka said, trying to be polite.

"You're welcome." Said Mizuki.

"By the way, Mizuki." Said Fuji. "I searched the entirety of this castle and I did not find Yuuta."

"When did you do that?" Eiji asked.

But Fuji was still looking right at Mizuki.

"Of course you didn't find him." Said Mizuki. "Because he is simply not here. Don't you think that, after twenty-three days, my Yuuta Senses would be tingling if he was here?"

Fuji's mouth fell open. "YOUR Yuuta Senses?" he demanded. "You think YOU have Yuuta Senses?"

"It's all right, Fuji," said Oishi. "Don't worry about it. I'm sure Mizuki was just kidding when he said that."

Inui cleared his throat. "Putting all of our morning ranting aside," he said. "Mizuki, I do believe it's very important for us to go out and search for the whereabouts of the other person or people."

"I agree." Said Mizuki. "That is our first priority. I will take you to the stables and you can do what you want from there."

"The stables?" everyone repeated.

Mizuki led them to a portion of his castle which was, ironically enough, stables. Wow.

"I can just take my own horse." Taka said.

"Me too." Said Kirihara. "I'd rather ride my own horse than some other random horse."

Mizuki looked at them quizzically. "Horse?" he said, looking as though he was enjoying their eager expressions. "I'll have you that the king is not in possession of mere _horses_."

Mizuki pushed the stable doors open and revealed that they were all in the presence of horses that were so white that they sparkled and glowed. But these weren't just horses. Anyone who took a second glance, would have quickly seen that they were unicorns.

"Unicorns…?" everyone stuttered.

"Yes." Said Mizuki.

Everyone scattered to go and inspect the creatures, except for Inui who hung around Mizuki who was just standing there looking pleased.

"…What kind of Universe is this?" said Inui. "It's not simply a Universe with kings and knights, is it?"

"I suppose it's like a fairy tale." Mizuki said with a chuckle. "Fairies, nymphs, centaurs, sprites, unicorns, dwarves…"

He trailed off.

"Then there are the elves in the forest." He added.

"What about them?" asked Inui.

"Just a day before I appeared here," Mizuki began. "A precious item was stolen from the palace, and apparently it was the doing of the elves. I sent some soldiers to retrieve it, but they never returned."

"What precious item was stolen?" Inui asked.

"I'm not sure exactly what it is." Mizuki admitted. "But the other higher ranked officials of the palace refer to it only as 'The Eye'."

"The Eye." Inui repeated.

He stood there looking contemplative.

"Speaking of which," Mizuki began.

"Don't ask about the patch." Inui warned.

Mizuki stopped.

"All right, fine." He said defensively. "But why were you so interested in the elves stealing The Eye?"

"Well, it seems to be a substantial problem occurring in this Universe." Inui replied. "And it always seems as though the substantial problem has to be solved before we are allowed to leave the Universe."

"So you think that maybe we have to retrieve The Eye?" Mizuki questioned.

"It's just a guess." Said Inui. "I have no way of knowing until we actually receive the message on the remote. And the mission won't appear until we find the other person."

Mizuki crossed his arms. "Well, look anywhere you wish." Mizuki offered. "But the forest on the north side of the city has an abandoned path that leads to the Elvin Domain. I highly suggest _not _searching there."

"I will keep that in mind." Inui said.

"With that, enjoy." Mizuki said. "And as soon as you find this person, make sure to bring him back to the castle."

"We'll have to." Said Inui. "We'll only get the mission if we're all together."

"Then I will see you all in a little bit." Mizuki nodded to Inui and then departed.

"Hey Inui!" shouted Momo. "There are ten unicorns here!"

"Then we should split up into groups of two." Inui said. "Kirihara and Taka can be in their own groups since they can ride their own horses. Search all day long and meet back here at the palace when the sun sets. Hopefully by then someone will have found the missing person."

Inui then briefed them on what Mizuki had told him about the Elves and how they should avoid going near that forest. Everyone saluted Inui's wisdom and faced the daunting task of having to mount the unicorn. However, they all found it magically quite easy as if they had done it their entire lives, and Eiji quickly pointed out that it MUST have been because unicorns were magical!

The groups split up in the most obvious groups that they would split up in. It was all quite obvious how they would split up. Except there was a bit of a problem at the end. Fuji was originally going to go with Taka, but seeing how Taka was meant to be in his OWN group, certainly that wasn't going to fly. So Fuji ended up being with the leftover person; Jirou.

"Oh my god." Said Jirou as he hopped up on the unicorn behind Fuji. "Now that we're out of the Ninja Universe, do you think we're still married?"

Fuji just sat there.

"Don't ever bring that up again." Fuji said. "Ever."

"Okay." Said Jirou, looking a little frightened.

The groups took off.

"So do we even know what we're looking for?" Ryoma sighed.

"We're looking for a person who does not belong in this Universe." Momo answered. "What do you think the chances are that it's Tezuka?"

"Knowing Tezuka, he found his OWN way back to our original Universe." Ryoma rolled his eyes.

"He's the only one from our team we haven't found yet." Momo said. "So I'm willing to bet that either you're right or he'll be in the last Universe we get to!"

"I am going to need some serious therapy after we get out of all this business." Ryoma admitted.

Eiji and Oishi were galloping on their unicorn down a pleasant little road until they came across a cute little house.

At least, that's what Eiji called it. "What a cute little house!" Eiji announced as he pulled the reins of the Unicorn to stop it. Oishi couldn't seem to remember why he had let Eiji hold the reins, but now he sort of regretted it.

"Eiji, please…" said Oishi as Eiji hopped off the unicorn.

"Let's just go up to the front door, knock on it and see if anyone we recognize is inside!" Eiji said. "That's what we're supposed to be doing, isn't it?"

"I guess." Oishi said reluctantly.

Choutarou and Shishido were making their rounds in a more productive manner. The two of them had stopped the unicorn in the middle of the town square and decided to wait for people to come bustling out of the shops and see if they recognized any of them.

"What do you think?" said Choutarou. "Do you think it'll be Kabaji?"

"Mizuki and Kabaji?" Shishido said. "Nah. No way."

"Why?" said Choutarou.

"It's too random." Shishido said. "I mean, it just doesn't make sense. The only thing that would probably make LESS sense is if we found Kabaji with Sengoku from Yamabuki or something."

"Yeah…" said Choutarou. "But you know…Hiyoshi WAS with that random guy Shinji from Fudomine…"

"Yeah so I guess anything is possible." Shishido admitted.

Oshitari and Gakuto came across a field where there were animals grazing. Their first thought that it was a cow farm, but after a second of looking at it, they found that it was a centaur farm.

The two of them sat atop their unicorns for a little bit, and finally Oshitari turned around and looked at Gakuto, and Gakuto sat up and looked at Oshitari.

"Centaurs are SO weird." Gakuto said.

"I agree." Oshitari said.

Gakuto cleared his throat awkwardly. "How do you suppose…" he started. "They uh…you know."

"They what?" Oshitari asked.

"They uh…do it." Said Gakuto. "How do you suppose they have sex?"

Oshitari was silent for a few seconds. "Gakuto, why is that the first thing you think about?" he said, snapping the reins of the unicorn as they rode off.

Kamio was sitting on the unicorn outside a small store, waiting for Shinji to emerge. After a little while of waiting, Shinji came out and mounted the unicorn.

"I guess you had no luck." Kamio inferred.

"Nope." Said Shinji. "I gave the man Tachibana's description, but he said he'd never seen him before."

Kamio looked ultimately deterred.

"This is horrible." He said. "At this miserable rate, we'll never find Tachibana."

"Don't worry." Said Shinji, putting his hand on Kamio's shoulder. "We'll find him. He wouldn't leave us."

"Yeah!" said Kamio. "And in this situation, Tachibana would definitely tell us to keep looking for him. I just know it!"

"Well actually," said Shinji. "In this situation, Tachibana wouldn't tell us to keep looking for him because if he was telling us to keep looking for him then that would mean that he is here and therefore it would be pointless for us to keep looking for him, so he wouldn't be telling us to do something that would be pointless."

"I suppose so…" Kamio glared at Shinji.

Then they both looked up at the clouds and saw Tachibana's face in them, and it gave them strength.

Ryou and Atsushi weren't quite as inspired as the other two.

"That Mizuki guy seems like a really big tool!" said Ryou.

"He is kind of." Said Atsushi. "But he's great at tennis and pretty good at coaching us! Sometimes I sort of think that he would make a better captain than our actual captain."

"Shut up, Atsushi." Said Ryou. "I don't care about St. Rudolph!"

"You shut up, Ryou!" Atsushi ordered. "Why do we always end up in a group together?"

"I don't know." Said Ryou. "But sometimes I think you're possessed by a retarded ghost or something…"

"Oh it's on now, bitch!" said Atsushi.

The two of them started to swat at each other like cats.

Inui and Kaidou were trotting along atop their gorgeous unicorn. They weren't currently talking about anything of interest.

"This city is huge." Said Kaidou. "And what if they're not even in this city? Even if we've split up into these little groups and search around everywhere, what are the chances of us finding the other person or people in this lifetime?"

Inui suddenly pulled the reins of the unicorn to a stop. Kaidou looked around as Inui got off the unicorn.

"Do you see them?" Kaidou asked.

"No." said Inui as he picked up a stick off the ground and smoothed out some dirt.

He started writing some equations in the dirt.

"What are you doing?" Kaidou said, looking a little annoyed.

"I was intrigued by your rhetorical question." Said Inui. "I'm going to check the math to see if we will be able to find the missing person or people within this lifetime."

"Are you serious?" said Kaidou.

"Yes." Said Inui.

Kirihara and Taka were searching on their own for a little while, but they happened to meet up with each other and decided they were lonely so they teamed up.

"You know something?" said Kirihara.

"What?" said Taka.

"I've decided that I'm no longer going to interfere with true love." Kirihara declared.

Taka rode silently.

"…What?" he repeated.

"Your horse and my horse, I mean." Kirihara said. "They are so obviously completely infatuated with each other."

"Ohhhh…" said Taka with a nod. "Okay, I get it. Yeah, okay."

"Yeah, I kind of realized it was pointless to keep it up anymore." Kirihara shrugged.

"Well that's good." Said Taka. "I'm sure our horses are very happy about it."

"Yeah." Said Kirihara. "Too bad they'll probably disappear when we get back to our Universe."

Taka's lip quivered slightly. "Yeah…" he said.

Atobe and Hiyoshi were engaged in a somewhat interesting conversation, when they happened to notice another unicorn. Sitting atop the unicorn was Fuji and Jirou, and they were still and silent, both looking off in the direction of the forest that was just north of the city.

Atobe decided to see what was going on, so he got off the unicorn and walked over.

"May I inquire as to what you're doing?" Atobe asked.

"Sh." Fuji instructed.

Atobe looked shocked. "Sh?" he said, sounding appalled.

"Yes." Said Fuji. "Yuuta is here. I _know _it."

"What?" said Hiyoshi as he came over as well.

"Yuuta is in that forest somewhere." Fuji said.

"We've been here practically the whole time." Jirou sighed.

"Inui said that Mizuki said that we shouldn't go in there." Atobe reminded him.

"And why do you think Mizuki would say something like that?" Fuji said.

"Er…because it's dangerous?" Hiyoshi tried.

"Because he knows Yuuta is in there." Fuji corrected. "And he wants to keep us apart."

"I don't think so." Atobe said. "He explained why. It's because of the evil elves."

"Come now." Said Fuji. "Do you know how ridiculous that sounds? Evil elves. Really. I bet there's just another village on the other side of the forest, and that's where Yuuta is. So if you don't want to come then don't come."

Fuji stared them all down.

"Well now I'm kind of curious." Jirou admitted.

"We will come along." Atobe said, mounting the unicorn.

"We?" said Hiyoshi. "Do I have to?"

"Yes." Atobe ordered.

Hiyoshi frowned and mounted as well.

"Let's just be back by sun down." Atobe said.

"I'll find Yuuta." Said Fuji as a shadow covered half his face. "BEFORE Mizuki does."


	58. Fruity

Channel 58- Fruity

The sun had set in almost its entirety when the rest was starting to get concerned about the noticeable absence of Fuji, Jirou, Atobe and Hiyoshi.

"Fuji, Jirou, Atobe and Hiyoshi are noticeably absent." Inui said. "And therefore I am concerned."

"What are we going to do?" Oishi asked.

"Ootori, go find them." Inui ordered.

"Me?" said Choutarou.

"It's Thursday so you should be able to use your tracking power." Inui pointed out.

Choutarou's face fell. "Well, the truth is, every other Thursday—"

"Never mind." Inui sighed, looking frustrated. "We will send out a small search party composed of Oshitari, Ootori, Gakuto and Shinji."

They waited.

"Why?" said Shishido finally.

"Because." Said Inui. "Ootori and Shinji can fly. Gakuto is a 'Scouting Type' ninja so therefore his specialty is to find people. And, as a detective, it is also Oshitari's specialty to find people."

"Hey, I'm a Scouting Type Ninja too!" said Eiji.

"Not REALLY." Said Gakuto.

"It's legitimate!" said Eiji defensively.

"Just as legitimate as my marriage to Oishi." Gakuto pointed out.

"Oh yeah…" said Eiji, looking dejected.

"It's okay, Eiji." Said Oishi in a very comforting and motherly tone.

"What are we all supposed to do until you guys get back?" Momo demanded.

"Anything you want." Inui shrugged.

"Oh right." Momo nodded.

With that said, Oshitari took to his own unicorn while Gakuto preferred to be a stealthy ninja. Choutarou and Shinji, of course, flew.

The others watched them go.

"I sort of wish I could fly." Said Atsushi.

Meanwhile, off in the forest north of the town, the four Yuuta hunters were on foot. After trudging through the forest for a little while with unicorns, they realized that riding them was not terribly practical and discarded them.

Now they sort of concluded that walking was not terribly practical, nor was much of anything they were doing.

"It's getting hard to see." Atobe sighed. "It's almost pitch black."

"I wish I had my wand…" Hiyoshi said. "Or my broom. Or anything."

"This IS getting rather treacherous." Even Fuji had to admit it.

"No problem guys!" said Jirou, standing proudly. "This sort of thing is my specialty! My Primary is Strategy!"

"I don't believe that." Atobe said.

"Well it's true!" Jirou said. "And I'm a ninja so the darker it is, the better I perform!"

"You're right, Jirou." Said Hiyoshi. "As long as we have you around, we're going to be all set."

AS Hiyoshi was saying that, they heard the sound of a large object cracking and breaking.

"What is that?" Fuji looked up.

"Look out, Atobe!" Jirou yelled as he dove into Atobe and pushed him out of the way just as a gigantic branch plummeted to the ground and landed with a loud CRASH!

Everyone was a little shaken up by that.

"Giant branches just don't FALL." Fuji said. Then he shook his fist. "This is all Mizuki's doing…"

"Fuji wait." Said Hiyoshi, putting his hand up.

Fuji was about to say, "We'll I've NEVER!" when he realized just what he was being shushed for. As it turned out, in Jirou's valiant efforts to rescue Atobe, the branch had landed on him, crushing his leg.

"You know something weird?" said Jirou as he looked up at everyone standing over him. "I don't even feel any pain."

"It's probably because you're in shock." Hiyoshi said.

"I appreciate you saving me, Jirou." Said Atobe.

"Anytime!" said Jirou.

They all stood there.

"Now what?" asked Hiyoshi.

"Well, let's try to get Jirou out from underneath that branch." Atobe suggested.

The others agreed that that was a priority so they all started working together to lift the branch up.

"I still think it's strange that this branch fell out of nowhere." Fuji said as he stopped working once he realized that his efforts were doing absolutely nothing. "It's not like there's any wind."

They finally got the branch off Jirou and were quite distraught to find that he couldn't walk.

"Well obviously." Said Hiyoshi. "Probably all the bones in that leg are shattered."

"Shattered?" Jirou repeated.

"You're seriously not feeling any pain right now?" Atobe questioned, looking skeptical.

"No, not yet." Said Jirou.

"That'll change." Atobe said.

"So much for having Jirou and being okay." Said Hiyoshi. "Let's get out of here and regroup with the others."

"Yes, but do YOU know the way out?" Atobe questioned.

"Um…no…" Hiyoshi admitted.

"Then it's best to wait here until someone finds us." Atobe said, sitting down on the ground. "Especially with Jirou in such a condition."

"Yeah, about that…" Jirou said slowly. "My leg is starting to hurt…"

Suddenly, an arrow whizzed by and lodged into the giant branch.

The quartet sat there and stared at the arrow blankly for a few seconds, and then promptly decided that they didn't wish to be in a situation that involved arrows. Hiyoshi took it upon himself to pick up Jirou and dart off, with Atobe and Fuji quickly following behind them.

They could hear the whizzing of more arrows as they lodged into trees around them.

"We're being shot at!" Atobe yelled as he faulted over a fallen tree.

"Not likely!" Jirou called. "Obviously this assailant could hit us if he wanted to! But he's not!"

"So why isn't he?" Hiyoshi said.

"He's trying to lead us somewhere!" Jirou answered.

"Where?" Fuji said.

But Jirou and Hiyoshi suddenly tumbled downwards into a large hole. Atobe saw this happen and stopped as short as he could, barely teetering on the edge of the hole. Fuji stopped as well, but he crashed into Atobe in his stopping and ended up causing them both to fall in the hole.

They all lied there in the quite large and quite deep hole.

"Everyone needs to get off of my LEG!" Jirou yelled. "Owww!"

Jirou started whining and complaining as the others scrambled to accommodate his needs.

That's when they heard a strange murmur above them.

Slowly, they turned and looked up to see two silhouettes of human figures leaning over the edge of the hole, looking down upon them. They were also clearly whispering to one another.

"HEY!" Jirou yelled, waving his arms. "Hey guys! A little help?"

"I don't think so, Jirou." Said Atobe, noticing the two figures didn't flinch. "Did you catch sight of the bows on their backs?"

"Oh yeah." Said Jirou. "I'm willing to bet that they're the ones who shot at us and probably dug this hole too."

"You think so?" said Hiyoshi, looking a little annoyed.

"They don't call me a Strategy Type Ninja for nothing." Jirou said.

"I'll take care of this." Said Atobe as he reached for his gun but Hiyoshi put his hand over Atobe's.

"Hang on." Said Hiyoshi. "They might not be hostile. This could be a big misunderstanding."

"He's right." Said Fuji. "We haven't even tried talking to them yet."

He turned around and looked up at the figures that were all looking down at them curiously.

"Hello!" he called, and waited for a response. "We're a little lost. We're not sure where we are. Could you tell us where we can go to find Fuji Yuuta?"

"No, not Fuji Yuuta!" said Atobe angrily.

But there was a collective gasp from the figures above them.

"Do you know the name?" Fuji asked.

One of the figures suddenly yelled out in a voice that sounded like a Yak Back Pen. The words were incomprehensible.

The four in the hole looked at each other.

"Care to repeat that more slowly and with smaller words?" Jirou requested.

The figures mumbled something again and then suddenly disappeared. After a few seconds of waiting, those in the hole grew impatient.

"Where the hell did they go?" Atobe demanded. "Are they just going to leave us here?"

"It would seem that way." Hiyoshi frowned.

"How high would you say this hole is?" Fuji questioned. "We might be able to get out if we all stacked on top of each other."

"That might work." Hiyoshi commented.

"Would you two be able to support my weight?" Atobe asked.

The others stared at him.

"What?" said Atobe. "Jirou obviously can't. That's just out of the question."

"OBVIOUSLY, Atobe, you will be at the bottom of the pile because you are the tallest and likely the heaviest." Fuji commented. "Then Hiyoshi has to go on your shoulders and then you both have to pull me up and I'll climb out of the hole."

"And what exactly are you going to do after you get out?" Atobe asked.

"Get something to get the rest of you out." Fuji said in the DUH tone. Though it was pretty obvious.

"I don't like the plan." Said Atobe. "Let's think of a new one."

Eventually, after much argumentation and convincing, they finally got Atobe to pull Hiyoshi up on his shoulders. Then they stood there foolishly for a moment as Fuji waited.

"What are you waiting for?" Jirou asked.

"Hurry up!" Atobe commanded.

"I don't know how I'm going to do this." Fuji said finally. "It was hard enough for Hiyoshi to get on your shoulders even with my help, but now I have to get up twice as high with no one's help."

They considered this for a few moments.

"Okay, point taken." Said Hiyoshi. "Let me down, Atobe."

"It's not like I WANT you up there." Atobe glared as Hiyoshi climbed down. "Now that I've gone through that pointless humiliation, does anyone have a more productive idea?"

Then Atobe hit his fist into his open palm.

"I forgot about my flare." He said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out said accessory.

"Well that was your doing." Said Jirou. "We had no way of knowing about a flare."

"Aren't you in immense pain?" Atobe questioned.

"Don't remind me!" Jirou wailed as he grabbed his leg and whined.

"All right, let's just hope someone is paying attention to the sky." Said Atobe as he pointed it upwards. Just as he was about to set it off, something suddenly shot into the hole.

"It's another arrow." Hiyoshi picked up the arrow and found there was some kind of box attached to it. He looked up to see that the observers had returned.

"Maybe it's a peace offering." Atobe suggested. "Open it up."

"Are you sure about that?" Fuji put his hands on his hips.

"Of course I'm not." Said Atobe. "I've done this as often as you have."

Hiyoshi untied it from the arrow and opened the tiny latch. When the box opened up, smoke flew into Hiyoshi's face so he promptly dropped it, allowing the smoke to fill the hole.

"That smells fruity." Jirou commented.


	59. The Eye

Channel 59- The Eye

"I don't know what you could possibly hope to gain from visiting the place where The Eye once was, but I don't see the harm in showing you."

Mizuki led Inui to an extremely vast room that was even larger and grander than the throne room. All of the patterns on the walls and floors seemed to lead right into the middle where there was a pedestal sticking out of the ground.

Inui approached the pedestal to see that there was a scepter resting in a tiny carved hole. The scepter was missing an orb that was supposed to hang right at the top.

"What do you want to know?" Mizuki asked.

"Everything." Inui answered.

"The scepter." Mizuki began. "It's mine, apparently. But without The Eye, it's completely useless."

"And…with The Eye?" Inui asked.

"Magical." Mizuki said. "With it, the wielder is granted the ability to be able to see the past, present and future."

Inui stood there foolishly.

"WHAT?" he said.

"Past, present and future." Mizuki repeated.

"I heard that." Inui said. "I am appalled because you haven't made more of an effort to locate this Eye. That would be an amazing power. Ootori can't even do that. Well, then again, he probably can. On weekends or something."

"You're rambling." Mizuki pointed out.

"Right." Said Inui. "So why didn't you attempt to bring it back?"

"I've been busy with other things." Mizuki answered.

"Abusing your authority?" Inui tried.

"How did you guess?" Mizuki said with a smile.

"I think we all went through that sort of phase." Inui said.

"So…you think retrieving this eye will somehow take us back home?" Mizuki asked.

"That's the theory." Said Inui. "But not home. Just to the next Universe. There's still ten more people to find."

"Whatever." Said Mizuki.

Meanwhile, in a very different part of the palace, Momo, Ryoma, Eiji, Oishi and Kaidou were having a field day in the courtyard.

"You know something, Eiji?" said Momo. "When you suggested catching fireflies as something to do while in an enchanted castle, I thought you were retarded or something."

"Turns out they're not fireflies at all!" Eiji exclaimed. Then he looked at Momo. "Hey!"

"I hope these fairies don't mind." Said Oishi as he put a lid on a jar with a few fairies flying around frantically. They were glowing like fireflies, except more than just their asses were glowing.

"Guys, I can't catch any…" Ryoma said pathetically as he fell into a mud puddle.

"Ryoma, why are you such a failure at everything?" demanded Kaidou as it randomly offended him.

"It's the Mary-Sue's fault…" Ryoma whined, pushing himself out of the mud.

"You can't go on making that your excuse forever." Said Momo.

"But that is the reason." Ryoma reminded him.

Momo paused a moment as he watched his fairies flutter around hopelessly.

"Oh right." He commented.

Meanwhile even again, Shishido was wandering down the halls of the castle looking at the old looking pictures hanging on the wall. He was feeling a little deprived because he was the only person around who was on Hyoutei and was currently not going on a little adventure. Jirou, Hiyoshi and Atobe were all off being missing while Oshitari, Choutarou and Gakuto searched for them.

He gave a discontented sigh and wondered whose company he was going to be subjected to.

That's exactly when he looked up and saw the disagreeable twins with Kamio. The trio was looking at a giant picture of Mizuki that was hanging on the wall and making their own commentary.

"I don't really think it looks like him…" Atsushi said, peering at the painting.

"Does it matter?" Ryou commented.

"Why am I hanging out with you two?" Kamio questioned.

Just then, Shishido walked over. And he just stood there.

"Can we help you?" the twins said simultaneously.

Shishido shrugged. "I don't know." He said. "I don't have anyone to hang out with."

"How come?" Kamio asked.

"Because everyone on Hyoutei left the castle." Said Shishido.

"Oh." Said Kamio. "Same here. Everyone on Fudomine left. Well, it's only Shinji. But yeah. He left."

"I'm the only one on Rokkaku here." Said Ryou.

"Yeah, but you have him." Shishido gestured towards Atsushi.

"I don't like him." Atsushi said. "I'd rather he DIDN'T hang out with me."

"Ditto." Ryou agreed.

"So why are you guys hanging out with each other?" Shishido asked.

"Because neither of us know anyone else." Ryou answered.

"Except Mizuki, but I don't really like him all that much either." Atsushi said. "I guess it's sort of the case of the lesser of two evils."

Shishido then looked at Kamio.

"I don't know." Said Kamio. "I don't really know anyone else either. And the people I sort of know all went off together to catch fireflies and I figured it would be random for me to be THERE. So I decided to stick with the random leftover people group."

"Random leftover people?" Shishido rubbed his chin. "Say… where's Kirihara?"

Speaking of Kirihara, he was off at the stables with Taka.

Their horses were there too.

"You know…" said Kirihara to Taka. "I wonder what will happen to them when we get home."

Taka frowned. "Yeah." He said. "I hope they don't just disappear completely and all together."

"Maybe they'll just be thrown back to those Universes that we came from." Said Kirihara. "As if they never left."

"Do you think they know the difference?" said Taka.

"I don't know." Kirihara said.

The two of them gave heavy sighs and stared at each other.

"You know…" said Taka. "We're kind of pathetic."

"I agree." Kirihara nodded. "We have seriously never had a conversation about anything that didn't involve our horses."

"Yeah." Said Taka. "Okay. Let's try. Do you have any favorite movies?"

"Hm…" said Kirihara, looking contemplative. "Did you ever see Monty Python and the Holy Grail?"

"Score." Said Taka. "Yeah."

"Good movie." Said Kirihara. "Good movie."

"Yeah, good movie." Taka nodded.

The two of them stared at each other again, and then awkwardly started petting their horses.

"I think I know why we never really had conversations with each other outside the topic of our horses." Said Taka.

"Yeah, me too." Kirihara said. "We don't NEED to. The only thing we have in common is that we have horses."

"And we both like Monty Python and the Holy Grail." Taka pointed out.

"That too." Said Kirihara.

"Okay…that being said…" Taka said. "I'm going to go meet up with everyone on my team catching fireflies in the courtyard."

"And I'm going to go find the random leftover people group." Kirihara said.

With that, they parted ways.

Far off in the distance, the search party suddenly came to a halt as Gakuto called for everyone to come.

"What'd you find?" said Shinji as he landed and dismounted from his broom.

"Blood, I think." Gakuto said.

"A little light?" Oshitari requested.

"All right," said Choutarou as he put out his hand and a little ball of fire formed, providing a sufficient amount of light.

The other three just stared at him.

"What?" Choutarou said.

"Nothing." Said Oshitari. "You just have every power in the world."

"Not IN THE WORLD." Choutarou defended himself.

"Never mind." Said Oshitari as he whipped out a magnifying glass and observed Gakuto's findings.

"What do you say?" Gakuto asked.

"Blood." Oshitari said. He stood up and pocketed the magnifying glass, and looked around briefly. "I think I understand what happened."

"What?" the other three said eagerly.

"All right." Said Oshitari. "Atobe was standing here. Jirou was there. Fuji was over there, and Hiyoshi there. I think some sort of…fight broke out?"

Oshitari shuffled around and looked at the ground, gesturing for Choutarou to bring the light over.

"No, not a fight." He concluded. "Jirou leapt at Atobe to get him out of the way of… that…" he pointed at the large branch on the ground. Then he knelt down in front of the blood. "This is Jirou's blood."

"The branch fell on top of him?" Shinji said.

"Yes." Said Oshitari. "The others pushed the branch off and that's when…"

He yanked the arrow out of the branch and observed it.

"This." He said. "They were under attack. So they swiftly ran..."

He gazed around and then his eyes settled in one direction.

"THIS way." He decided.

"Are you sure about this?" Gakuto asked.

Oshitari walked right up to Gakuto and slapped him across the face. "Of course I'm sure!" he said. "MUST you question me?"

"Yuushi!" said Gakuto, looking SO betrayed as he caressed his face.

"Let's check it out." Shinji said, pushing past everyone as he started walking in the direction that Oshitari had pointed.

They all started walking, and Gakuto was still whining.

"Gakuto, I'm sorry I slapped you but I was passionate because I was in detective mode." Said Oshitari. "You're just lucky it was a slap and I didn't end up breaking your neck."

Gakuto wore an over animated frown.

"How far do we have to go?" Choutarou asked. Oshitari pointed at the ground right underneath Choutarou, and he looked down to discover that he was suddenly hovering right over a large hole.

"The trail stops here." Oshitari said.

Choutarou looked down in the hole and then got out of the way so everyone else could see too.

"There's no way of telling if someone was down there." Said Shinji.

"Yes there is." Said Oshitari with a sigh. "Please don't make me smack you too."

Then he started looking around at the ground around the hole.

"Well," he said. "Several people observed the ones in the hole from here."

Gakuto sniffed the air. "What's that smell?" he asked.

"Smells fruity." Choutarou commented.

"Judging by the tracks leading away from the hole…" Oshitari said, looking fully engrossed in observing said tracks. "I'd say that whoever fell down was either carried away or dragged away…"

"The fruity smell could be a sedative." Shinji commented.

"Yes." Oshitari said.

"What an obvious trail." Gakuto said. "Finding where they went should be no problem."

"You do it, Gakuto." Said Oshitari. "I'm good at figuring out what happened. You're the expert at following a trail."

"We make such a great team, Yuushi!" said Gakuto excitedly.

"So you forgive me for slapping you?" Oshitari said.

"No, I'm still mad!" said Gakuto, crossing his arms and turning his back to the others.

"Oh well." Said Oshitari with a shrug.


	60. His Highness

Channel 60- His Highness

"Wait. Jirou." Said Atobe as he sat next to Jirou who was just chillaxing like nothing was out of the ordinary. "When you woke up your leg was fine?"

"Yeah." Said Jirou, stretching out his previously injured leg. "Funk-tastic, huh?"

"I do not respond to words like 'funk-tastic'." Atobe said, doing the quoteys.

"We seriously JUST got out of a prison." Hiyoshi said, trying to peer out the tiny window that was on the door.

"Why has NO ONE come to communicate with us?" said Fuji, putting his hands on his hips.

Just as he said that, the door suddenly swung open, and Hiyoshi had to practically do a Matrix dodging move in order to avoid being smooshed against the wall.

Just when everyone was going to demand why they were being held, they were all rendered speechless with what stood before them. A tall but young man with long flowing blond hair and bright blue eyes was standing there and looking quite perturbed. He was dressed in elegant but extremely foreign clothing. But the most striking thing about him was his long pointed ears. This man was an ELF. WTF.

He ranted at them for a moment in a totally unidentifiable language, but luckily he gathered from the completely vacant expressions on his company's faces that they didn't understand a word he was saying.

He cleared his throat hesitantly.

"My name is Senjo." He said, which relieved the others to hear their native tongue, though he was heavily accented. "I am the Prince's personal attendant."

"Your people are the ones who chased us, shot at us, trapped us, drugged us and are now holding us captive here, aren't you?" Atobe demanded.

"Humans know the Forest is forbidden, so we just took you to see what your intentions were." Senjo answered.

"A likely story." Atobe crossed his arms.

"That probably is what happened, Atobe." Jirou pointed out.

"I don't doubt it." Atobe tapped his foot with a cross expression.

"We also feared you were searching for The Eye." Senjo admitted.

"The Eye?" the Humans repeated.

"We only just managed to take it back from—" Senjo started but then he stopped himself. "Why am I telling you this? It is best for you to just await the Prince's decision for what he is going to do with you."

"And how long is that going to take?" Hiyoshi said.

"It's impossible to say." Senjo said. "His Highness has been feeling quite ill lately. And he is no better now after healing that one."

"Healing?" said Jirou, noticing that Senjo pointed at him. "He can heal?"

"All of our Elvin royalty has the ability." Senjo said. "I don't know why, but he seemed quite adamant about making sure to let us all know that he was going to decide your fates, and to make sure your stay was comfortable."

"Is this comfortable?" Fuji said, gesturing around the room.

"Other prisoners would call it luxury." Senjo answered as he went for the door.

"Just when is this prince guy going to be feeling better?" Atobe said before Senjo could leave.

"We can't tell." Senjo answered. "His sickness is in the mind somehow…it's been plaguing his highness for weeks on end. He suddenly had trouble with speech… and then he was clumsy all about, as if he were completely out of sorts. It almost seemed as though he didn't know where he was or where he was going. His condition has been improving, but he doesn't seem like our same Prince as we have always known him."

The others only looked at Senjo.

"The only reason I'm telling you this…" he started. "Is…well," he looked at Fuji. "You used the name of our Prince back in the Forest. We wouldn't have taken you back otherwise."

"Fuji Yuuta?" Fuji said, his eyes lighting up with sunshine and joy.

"I don't know what 'Fuji' means…" Senjo admitted. "But yes, Yuuta is the name of our Prince."

"You must take me to see him this instant!" Fuji commanded.

"As I have told you, our Prince is _ill_ and he cannot see anyone, especially not some crazy Human woman!" said Senjo.

Fuji's demeanor immediately changed. "I." he said. "Am not. Crazy. Or a woman. And you cannot deny me rights to see my brother."

"Now I certainly know you're crazy!" said Senjo as he darted out the door and slammed it behind him.

"I KNEW it!" said Fuji angrily. "Yuuta WAS here all along and Mizuki was hiding him from me!"

"How do you know this is your brother Yuuta?" said Hiyoshi. "Think about it. It might just be a coincidence that the Prince's name is Yuuta."

"Come now, Hiyoshi." Said Atobe. "Use your head."

"Yeah, they DID say he had been acting funny for a few weeks." Jirou pointed out. And it has been almost a month."

"Has it really been almost a month since I've seen Yuuta?" Fuji sighed, officially coming into possession of a one track mind.

"We have to figure out how we're going to get out of here." Atobe said.

"Wow." Said Fuji. "Yuuta is a prince! And elf prince. How strange. I'm so proud of him, nonetheless!"

"Let's try to concentrate on OTHER things." Atobe said.

"And he has the power to heal." Fuji said, looking more and more excited. "I can't wait until I see him. Oh Yuuta, you have finally surpassed me…"

He looked way too satisfied with life, that they didn't even both to tell him that Shinji had suddenly appeared in the window, hovering in the sky on his broomstick.

"I can't believe we actually found you guys." Said Shinji. "I have to admit that when we followed Gakuto and Oshitari around, I didn't expect that they actually knew where you were but as it turns out here you are…all four of you."

"Okay, that's enough." Said Atobe, leaning out the window and looking down to see Choutarou, Gakuto and Oshitari all standing on the ground. The sun was also rising. They had been gone all night!

"Let's get out of here!" Gakuto called up.

"Shh!" Atobe ordered. "As it turns out, Fuji was right about his Yuuta senses. He's somewhere here…wherever we are."

"In the middle of the forest in a giant castle." Shinji clarified.

"Right…" said Atobe. "So it would be best if the four of you came up here and we sought out Yuuta and THEN left."

"Okay!" Choutarou said. "Come on, guys. I'll fly you up there."

"We don't have to hold hands, do we?" said Oshitari.

"Well…" Choutarou said slowly. "I mean… you two can hold hands if you WANT…"

"No, I meant in a circle!" said Oshitari. "Since everything else you do involves holding hands."

"Oh." Said Choutarou. "No. I could just carry you up."

"Please do." Said Gakuto.

And that's exactly…what…he did.

"Well, this door is the only thing keeping you in?" Choutarou said as he went over to the door.

"Yes, that is it." Sighed Atobe.

Choutarou easily removed it from its hinges and set it aside as if that's the way doors should be opened.

"Well why didn't WE think of that?" said Jirou.

"I hope you're not being serious." Hiyoshi warned.

"I'm not." Jirou said. "You know me!"

Hiyoshi stared at Jirou quizzically, and then Fuji decided to make himself known.

"So we find Yuuta, and then we get out of here." Fuji said.

"Good plan, I like it." Said Shinji. "But how?"

"We've got two ninjas, two detectives, two wizards, a super hero and Fuji." Said Jirou. "I'm sure we can think of SOMETHING creative!"

Fuji glared at Jirou, but thankfully he wasn't paying attention or else he might have started bleeding from the eyes.

"Does anyone have anything that belongs to Yuuta?" said Choutarou. "It's Friday, so I can use my tracking power!"

"We don't have anything that belongs to Yuuta." Said Gakuto.

"I WISH I did." Fuji sighed.

"Okay, never mind." Said Choutarou.

"Well just think." Said Hiyoshi. "If he's the prince of this place, all we have to do is find the biggest room with the most guards and he'll definitely be there."

"Good call on that one." Atobe commented as he took out a magnifying glass in perfect syncro with Oshitari. "Let's do this quickly so we can get out of here."

"You should have seen Yuushi earlier, Atobe." Said Gakuto.

"Oh, should I have?" said Atobe.

"He was being the shit." Gakuto said.

"I don't want to hear about your escapades, Gakuto." Atobe said snootily.

"I meant when he was establishing what happened!" Gakuto said, on the verge of a temper tantrum. "He guessed all exactly right!"

"I don't GUESS." Said Oshitari.

"Whatever!" said Gakuto. "Never mind!"

"Gakuto, why don't you make yourself useful and do what Scouting Type Ninjas do best?" Atobe suggested. "Scout."

"I will!" said Gakuto. "Come on, Jirou. We don't need THEM."

"I'm not a Scouting Type Ninja." Said Jirou.

"It's your Tertiary!" Gakuto said.

"We only go by Primary and Secondary!" Jirou reminded him.

"You two, stop talking about ninja stuff that is wholly irrelevant." Shinji ordered.

"Thank you, I was afraid I would have to say something if you didn't." Fuji said.

"And stop antagonizing everyone, Gakuto." Said Hiyoshi.

"ME antagonizing everyone?" Gakuto demanded. "In case you haven't noticed, everyone else has been arguing with ME!"

But at this point, Gakuto was being quite loud so the others took it upon themselves to clamp hands over his mouth in order to keep him quiet. When they could hear someone coming down the hall, they quickly jumped into the closest doorway and shut it behind them.

After a few moments of remaining completely silent, they suddenly came to the realization that the footsteps they had heard happened to be coming into that exact room that they were currently hiding in.

So they dodged behind the door as it flung open and a familiar face strolled in; Senjo!

He, however, did not notice them as they foolishly stood there backed up against the wall. He strode confidently across the room where there was a large lavish bed. He stopped when he was about ten paces away, and then bowed, speaking in the strange dialect that he had used before earlier.

A figure rose from the bed, though his back was to both Senjo and the group, but it was obvious that he was also an elf with his long hair and pointed ears. From his body language, it was easy to tell that Senjo was urging the person to lie back down again, but he was not paying attention. Instead, he got to his feet and turned around.

Just as he was about to say something, he saw the eight people lined up against the back wall.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" he yelled at the top of his lungs as he dove off behind the bed and out of view.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" yelled the eight.

Senjo whipped around and saw them.

"How did you escape?" he demanded as he started advancing towards them, but the other elf suddenly popped up again and yelled something to Senjo.

Senjo stopped and the two of them conversed for a moment, and finally Senjo bowed to him.

"Our Prince was startled by your presence, but he has collected himself." Senjo explained.

"Prince?" Fuji said. "Come over here! Let me see your face!"

"How dare you order the Prince around!" Senjo said angrily, but the Prince just told Senjo to settle down again. He made his way around the bed and came towards where everyone else was gathered and, as he got closer, it became quite apparent to everyone just who he was.

"YUUTA!" Fuji exclaimed as he ran over and hugged his now royal Elvin baby brother. "I knew you were here all along! And your hair looks fabulous. What kind of conditioner are you using?"

Senjo came over and wrenched them apart.

"Our Prince is not well, do not assault him!" Senjo commanded.

"I wasn't assaulting him." Said Fuji. "Go on, Yuuta. Tell him you're my brother and we're here to take you home."

Yuuta only stood there staring blankly at Fuji. Then he leaned over to Senjo and whispered something in the strange language to him. Senjo glared at Fuji and then whispered back.

Yuuta nodded, and then explained something to Senjo that made his eyes bug out, look at him questioningly and then reluctantly turn back to Fuji and the others.

"Our Prince says that he has been waiting twenty-four days for you to arrive, and would like to know what is going on." Senjo said.

"I think I'd rather speak to him alone." Fuji said.

"Unless you know Elfish I'm afraid that's impossible." Said Senjo. "Our Prince does not subject himself to speaking your foul human tongue."

Blink.

"Wait…" said Fuji. "Yuuta… can you not understand me?"

Once again, Fuji only received a blank stare from his brother. Yuuta leaned over to Senjo once again and asked for a translation.

"Oh bother." Said Atobe, crossing his arms.


	61. Translation

Channel 61- Translation

"I am considering sending out another search party." Inui said as he looked out the window while the remaining people at the castle sat around the dinner table.

"Let's not be silly." Said Mizuki. "It's only been a day since they left last night to find the others."

"A day is a long time." Shishido commented.

"Oh please." Said Mizuki with a bit of a chuckle.

Just then, a servant came running in. "King Mizuki!" he said desperately.

"I love the sound of that." Mizuki said to the table before turning around and looking vaguely at the servant. "Yes?"

"The Elvin Prince has just arrived with escorts." The servant said.

Mizuki looked confused at first. "Elvin Prince?" he repeated finally. "He and his little band of so-called escorts are the ones who stole The Eye from us in the first place. No doubt they've come to steal from me again. Throw them in the dungeon and I will deal with them later."

"Yes, my lord!" said the servant as he departed.

Mizuki looked back at his guests.

"Very authoritative." Atsushi commented.

"Well, I've gotten used to the authority." Mizuki answered.

"Is it such a good idea to throw the Elvin Prince into the dungeon though?" Taka asked. "Wouldn't that start some sort of war? What if he was coming back to return The Eye to you?"

"Not likely." Mizuki said. "The Elves are conniving and liars. He may have returned and pretended to be peaceful but I saw through it. They cannot fool me."

"Your course of action gives me an all around unsettling feeling…" Taka admitted, looking somewhat ashamed.

"Well, you can join them if you like." Mizuki offered.

"I'm all set, thanks." Taka said.

Suddenly, the massive door swung open yet again and there stood the eight missing people who had departed the night before.

"Did you order to have us thrown in the dungeon?" demanded Fuji since nothing could offend him more.

"I…ordered to have the Elvin Prince thrown in the dungeon." Mizuki said, looking a little puzzled.

"YUUTA is the Elvin Prince." Fuji said as he few people stepped aside and gestured towards Yuuta who was just standing there with a "?" look on his face.

"Yuuta!" Mizuki exclaimed, standing up and sweeping over to Yuuta with his arms outstretched.

Yuuta looked uncomfortable and greeted Mizuki. Fuji made sure to get in between the two of them. "If not for the fact that we're in the company of many badass fighters who could fend off your soldiers then it's likely you wouldn't have known for days that you put Yuuta in the dungeon!"

"How true." Said Mizuki, looking at the others. "Thank you for being badass."

"We do what we can." Said Jirou.

"So, how have you been, Yuuta?" Mizuki asked as the others who were sitting at the table came over to stare at Yuuta to make him even more uncomfortable than he already was. "You're looking better than ever, but your coloration appears off. Are you feeling not well?"

"Don't bother, Mizuki." Said Fuji. "He only speaks and understands Elfish."

"Oh." Mizuki nodded. "That's unfortunate for him, but fortunate for me."

Mizuki cleared his throat, and then suddenly projected in the strange language that all the Elves had been speaking. Yuuta looked surprised at first and responded to him. The two of them began conversing in a language no one else could understand.

"WHAT?" Fuji said. "Why can MIZUKI speak the language?"

"I need to be able to speak to my enemies as well as my allies." Mizuki said. "Apparently it was taught to me when I was only a child. It certainly is coming in handy now, isn't it?"

"Well, be sure to explain the situation to him clearly." Said Inui, holding up the remote to show a nine. "Everything I told you about the remote control and the Universe hopping and the missions."

"Score, single digits." Said Momo.

"Very well." Said Mizuki, looking back at Yuuta. He went on explaining the situation to Yuuta as clearly as possible, and when he was finally done, Yuuta only paused a moment and then pointed at Fuji, saying a few words.

"What did he say?" Fuji said.

"He wants to know why you're a girl." Mizuki replied. "He didn't want to say anything before, but now it's bothering him."

"Well tell him of course the truth." Fuji said.

Mizuki nodded, looked back at Yuuta and explained very briefly.

Yuuta looked ultimately shocked and had a face that sufficiently captured the expression of "!" And then he hesitantly took a step back.

"You didn't tell him the truth!" Fuji inferred.

Choutarou suddenly came out of nowhere and put a hand on Yuuta's shoulder. "That's not true," he said in a very endearing tone. "The real reason is because the particular Universe that Fuji was found in was a Girl Universe. So it's like how you have changed appearance as well."

"He can't understand you." Mizuki reminded him.

But Yuuta was nodding and looking relieved. He then said something to Choutarou.

Choutarou laughed slightly. "No, I don't think so." He answered.

There was a little bit of silence.

"Someone explain to me what just happened." Eiji requested.

"I can understand everything he says, and it seems he can understand everything I say." Choutarou said. "Not unlike how I talk to animals like Taka and Kirihara's horses." Yuuta snapped something at Choutarou and looked offended. "No, I wasn't calling you an animal!"

"Why didn't you say that EARLIER?" Fuji said angrily. "You know, when we were back at the Elf castle?"

"It would have been more convenient than having to deal with Yuuta's foolish translator." Atobe commented.

"But Choutarou shouldn't have to deal with everyone taking advantage of him all the time!" Shishido said.

"Thanks, Shishido!" said Choutarou, beaming with happiness.

"I want to know what Mizuki said about me." Said Fuji, giving Mizuki the most intense glare ever, and then looking at Choutarou for answers.

"I would rather not get in the middle of such a confrontation!" Choutarou said, backing up.

"Good news." Inui said randomly. "I have received the mission for this Universe. As it turns out, I was right in my original assumption was correct. We have to retrieve The Eye back from the Elves to Mizuki's scepter."

"That should be easy." Said Atsushi. "Yuuta can just go there and bring it back here! He has enough authority to do something like that!"

"But in the morning." Jirou said with a mighty yawn. "I'm tired."

"No." said Oishi. "Now. Please."

"That's actually a good call." Inui said. "If all goes smoothly, we'll have The Eye back in the scepter within a few hours and if that's the case, we'll end up jumping Universes. I don't think we'll ever come to another Universe that has sufficient sleeping accommodations for all of us, so we should take advantage of this place while we can and get one final good night sleep."

No one could argue with that logic because it made perfect sense, so they all agreed and departed the dining room and made their way upstairs.

Of course, no one explained the plan to Yuuta, so he just stood there looking foolish with a big question mark above his head, before turning and chasing after the group.

"We switched the sleeping arrangement around last night." Shishido said.

"How so?" Oshitari asked.

"Well, it was essentially everyone in Seigaku was in one room and everyone else was in the other room." Shishido answered. "It's been a while since I've been in the 'everyone else' group."

"Right." Said Atobe as he pointed at the first door. "This is Hyoutei's room, that's Seigaku's room, and then everyone else can be in the next room."

"Thank you SO much for solving that problem, Atobe!" said Kirihara sarcastically.

"Ootori, would you be so kind as to tell Yuuta that he does not have to sleep in the everyone else room, but he can join me in the Seigaku room?" Fuji said.

The entirety of Seigaku gasped.

"Is that going to be all right with them?" Choutarou asked, pointing at the Seigaku team that looked so offended by this notion.

"Yes." Said Fuji, glaring at them. So they quickly nodded and said that they would love it if Yuuta shared a room with them.

"Okay." Said Choutarou as he looked at Yuuta who was standing there with this face that was like, "Why didn't I bring my translator along? This is retarded." Choutarou cleared his throat to get his attention. "Your brother says that—"

Yuuta suddenly interrupted Choutarou with some angry ranting.

Choutarou listened carefully and then nodded.

"Right, I'm sorry." Choutarou said.

"What?" said Fuji.

"Oh," said Choutarou. "He was just mad because I said 'your brother'. He doesn't want the word 'brother' to be referred to at all."

"All right, this is getting really dumb." Said Atobe. "I'm going to bed now."

Everyone who wasn't involved in the current conversation decided that they were going to depart as well. Yuuta confusedly watched the max exodus into various rooms and waited desperately for someone to explain to him what was going on.

"Everyone's just tired of waiting for us to finish talking." Choutarou explained.

"Just tell him what I told you to tell him and then we'll be done." Fuji said.

"Okay," Choutarou said. "Yuuta, Fuji says that you can join him in that room with the rest of Seigaku."

Yuuta turned around and looked at the door and pointed.

"Yes, that one." Fuji nodded.

Yuuta looked slightly uneasy and then said something to Choutarou while pointing at the leftover people room.

"I hope he didn't just say what I inferred he just said." Fuji said, crossing his arms.

"He says that he'd rather stay in the leftover people room." Choutarou translated. "Because he actually knows some of them."

"He knows ME." Fuji said.

"Fuji says that you know him." Choutarou said to Yuuta, and Yuuta replied. "Fuji, Yuuta says that he's just going to stay in the leftover people room and that it's not that big of a deal and you shouldn't be so creepy and annoying about everything."

Fuji's mouth hung open.

"Just remember, it wasn't ME who said it…" Choutarou said, backing away. "I was just translating…"

Choutarou dove into the Hyoutei room and slammed the door behind him as Fuji stood there fuming. But then, once he turned to Yuuta, he completely changed.

"Why, Yuuta?" he said mournfully. "I'm only trying to be a good big brother."

Yuuta only stared at Fuji, then slowly started nodding. He backed away, and eventually slinked into the leftover people room.


	62. Tenba

Channel 62- Tenba

"Okay, so Yuuta says that he knows where The Eye is and shouldn't have any trouble getting it back for us." Choutarou translated.

"Ask him how long it's going to take for him to get The Eye and bring it back here." Inui said.

"Yuuta, Inui wants to know how long it's going to take for you to get The Eye and bring it back here." Choutarou said. Yuuta responded. "Yuuta says that it won't take very long at all. The only thing that will take the time is traveling there and back."

"Tell Yuuta that Mizuki said it was all right for him to use one of his unicorns to make the trip faster." Inui said.

"Yuuta, Inui says that Mizuki said it was okay for you to use one of his unicorns." Choutarou said.

Yuuta looked puzzled at first, and then responded to Choutarou.

"Well," Choutarou said. "Inui, Yuuta says that it's impractical to ride a unicorn through the forest and it would be easier to fly over it."

"Well fine." Said Inui. "Tell Yuuta that you will take him there, or we could ask Hiyoshi or Shinji to fly him over with their brooms."

"Yuuta, Inui says that I could fly you there or Hiyoshi or Shinji could on their brooms." Choutarou said. Yuuta looked confused and asked a question. "Because they're wizards. Therefore they can fly on brooms."

Yuuta nodded and looked satisfied with this response, but then he began to shake his head.

They were outside now.

"Inui," Choutarou sighed. "Yuuta says that won't be necessary. He'll just use Tenba."

"Tenba?" said Inui.

"Tenba?" Choutarou repeated in Yuuta's direction.

Yuuta nodded and whipped out a flute from his pocket.

"He's going to use the flute to fly?" Inui questioned.

Abruptly, Yuuta put the flute to his lips and played a cute little tune. Inui and Choutarou stood around and waited for something to happen, like magical winds to come out of nowhere and sweep him away to a place of choice.

Instead, something much more interesting occurred. A large flying horse, a Pegasus, descended from the sky and landed right next to Yuuta.

Yuuta stroked the Pegasus and then looked at Choutarou and Inui who were impressed.

"Tenba." He said.

"That's his name." Choutarou whispered to Inui.

"I gathered." Inui said, slightly annoyed.

As it turned out, Kirihara and Taka happened to be returning to the castle mounted atop their horses when they had seen the Pegasus land.

"A flying horse!" said Kirihara. "Well, we've seen unicorns, so why not?"

"Is there a reason why the two of you are gallivanting about?" Inui asked.

"No." said Taka. "We just feel bad because our horses are so neglected so we decided to pay attention to them while you guys were out searching for The Eye. And besides, it's not like…"

Taka sort of trailed off because he couldn't help but notice that Kirihara's horse was standing super close to Tenba, the Pegasus.

Tenba was ignoring Forehand, of course, and looking at Horse. While Horse, on the other hand, was looking at Forehand.

"Um…what's going on?" Taka asked finally.

"Forehand, come on," Kirihara said, pulling at the reins, but Forehand fought to stay beside Tenba. Tenba started moving away from Forehand and towards Horse, even though Yuuta called to him to come back. Horse backed away from Tenba and was clearly only looking for Forehand.

"It's a love triangle!" Choutarou said finally. "Horse loves Forehand, Forehand loves Tenba and Tenba loves…" Choutarou paused a moment. "Horse. Tenba loves horse."

"What?" said Kirihara.

"Yuuta's horse is gay." Said Inui. "Yuuta has a gay Pegasus."

"What's this all about?" demanded Taka. "Your horse is dropping mine so fast just because of some random eye candy?"

"And doesn't she know that he's gay?" said Choutarou.

Yuuta immediately whipped around and demanded SOMETHING in a tone that suggested that he wanted to know who he was talking about.

"Oh, just your Pegasus." Said Choutarou. "We established that since he seems to have a crush on Taka's horse who is male, that your horse must be gay."

Yuuta blinked.

"YUUTA! YUUTA!" came Fuji's voice suddenly as he came frolicking out of the castle.

Yuuta turned around and saw Fuji, then groaned and slapped his forehead.

"Why did you leave so quickly?" said Fuji. "I think I remember telling you to meet up with me before you went off to find The Eye. Of course, that might have all been lost in translation so I can understand the confusion. But I'm here now so the two of us can go and find The Eye as brothers and best friends the way things should be. Is that a Pegasus?"

Yuuta only stood there.

Fuji turned to Choutarou. "Hello?" he said. "Aren't you going to translate for me?"

"Oh." Said Choutarou. "Yuuta, Fuji wants to know if that's a Pegasus."

Yuuta nodded at Fuji.

"Fuji, Yuuta says it is." Choutarou said.

"I know what a nod means." Said Fuji.

"And apparently, it's a gay Pegasus." Inui commented. "And it has a crush on Taka's horse."

"My horse does not sway that way!" said Taka with a pout.

"A gay Pegasus?" Fuji repeated. "Oh Yuuta! That's nothing to worry about! Quickly now, let's find The Eye." Fuji turned to everyone else. "Yuuta and I will go and get The Eye, and then bring it back here. Let's go, Yuuta!"

"Why are you in such a hurry?" said Kirihara.

And that's when Mizuki suddenly exited the castle. "Yuuta!" he said as he swept right over to Yuuta and proceeded to carry on a conversation that only he and Yuuta could understand. And Choutarou.

"Well, now that Mizuki's here to translate, I don't need to be here, right?" said Choutarou.

"I suppose not." Said Inui.

"Okay, because I said I'd meet Shishido for breakfast!" said Choutarou as he took off faster than the speed of light before Fuji could command him to stay.

"So," said Taka as Mizuki and Yuuta continued to talk. "I'm going to take my horse someplace where he can't be molested by Yuuta's horse and his heart won't be stepped on by Kirihara's horse!"

With that, Taka snapped the reins and rode off towards the stables.

"Well, look at that, Forehand!" said Kirihara, sounding somewhat angry. "It's no one's fault but your own. You ruined your own chance at happiness."

Yuuta continued to talk to Mizuki as he mounted Tenba.

"Is he leaving?" Fuji said. "Right now? So soon? Without me? Mizuki, translate my questions to Yuuta!"

"I don't feel like it." Said Mizuki.

Yuuta seemed to understand why Fuji was freaking out, though, because he made a hand signal to tell Fuji to calm down and imply that he was only going to be gone for a short amount of time.

Fuji nodded and tried to get a hold of himself. "Mizuki, tell Yuuta that I'll miss him."

Mizuki raised an eyebrow and turned to Yuuta. He mentioned something in Elfish that only made Yuuta's facial expression change to, "!" as he stared at Fuji.

"Never mind!" said Fuji. "Don't ever translate anything for me again! Yuuta, whatever he just said, it was a lie."

"Should I translate that?" Mizuki asked.

"No." said Fuji, crossing his arms.

Just then, Ryou and Atsushi came out of the castle, going straight for Inui.

Inui only stood there and allowed them to approach.

"What is it?" he said.

"Well," said Ryou. "Atsushi and I were inside doing nothing in particular when we realized that you all made a promise to us that you didn't fulfill!"

"Oh?" said Inui. "And what was that?"

"When we were in the Harry Potter Universe, you promised that you'd kill Kirihara so we could see him get resurrected when we went to the next Universe." Said Atsushi.

"YOU TWO!" Kirihara said angrily, looking like he was about to go on the warpath.

"The thing is," said Inui. "Shishido died in that Universe and it was unnecessary to kill Kirihara as well because you got to see HIM get resurrected."

"It's not the same." Said Ryou.

"Yeah!" said Atsushi. "It would be much more meaningful if we actually witnessed his death and then witnessed his resurrection!"

"Well then let me do it." Said Fuji as he grabbed Inui's shotgun (that he carries around at all times), whipped out it out shot Kirihara right in the chest. Kirihara was caught so off guard that he was knocked right off his horse and landed on the ground with a thump.

Yuuta's face was like "!" as he jumped off his gay Pegasus and grabbed Fuji, yelling at him in some unknown language.

"Mizuki, please explain to all of them that Kirihara isn't really dead." Said Inui.

"What?" said Mizuki, looking shaky. "I'm not associating myself with any of you anymore. You just murdered Kirihara."

"Oh right, we forgot to explain." Said Fuji as Yuuta continued to shake him to get his attention.

And, as Inui calmly started to explain the situation to Mizuki, Yuuta ran around frantically like a comical little character in a cartoon while yelling in his crazy language and trying to get the attention of someone who would explain to him the meaning of this heartless crime against Kirihara who was, by the way, quite dead by now.

Finally, Mizuki grabbed Yuuta's collar and sat him down. After quite a long explanation of everything that was occurring, Yuuta didn't look anymore satisfied. Apparently, to him, 'fake death' was not dissimilar from 'real death'.

"Well now that we all understand each other, let's hurry up and get that eye before Kirihara's corpse starts to rot." Inui said as he tried to shoo Yuuta towards his Pegasus.

"Quickly now, Yuuta, or else I may just miss you so much that it will become unbearable." Fuji said as he pulled out a hanky and started waving it to Yuuta.

Mizuki said something under his breath and Yuuta mounted his Pegasus and took off.

Then Inui looked at the twins who were, contrary to popular belief, were still there.

"Well, are you two satisfied?" he asked.

"Quite." They nodded.

With that, the twins, Fuji, Inui and Mizuki all started walking back towards the castle, leaving Kirihara there.

They didn't hang around long enough to notice Kirihara move and slowly raise his head. When he noticed they were gone, he sat up and shook his head, looking up at his horse that was just standing idly by.

He paused a moment, made sure no one else was around and then stood up. He looked down at the hole in his shirt and moved it aside to reveal he was wearing chain mail, like the kind Mizuki's soldiers wore.

"And Taka said I was being paranoid." He said under his breath.

Then he paused and looked around again.

"You know what?" he said to his horse. "We really need to get someone else from Rikkai Dai on this little adventure."


	63. Charade

Channel 63- Charade

"In retrospect, I'm thinking that perhaps we should have gathered everyone up while Yuuta was off retrieving The Eye." Said Inui as he, Yuuta and Mizuki all stood in the grand room that contained the scepter.

"Why does it matter?" Mizuki asked.

"Because we won't be able to leap to the next Universe until we're all together." Inui replied.

The Eye was a small orb, as was expected. It didn't look particularly special, but we all know better.

Mizuki took The Eye from Yuuta and put it in the middle of the scepter. The moment he did, Inui's remote beeped and declared that their mission was complete, but of course they did not leave.

"Well, that's fine." Said Mizuki, removing the scepter from the pedestal. "If this thing truly does have the power that was described to me, then we should be able to look for everyone else with it."

"By looking into the present?" Inui suggested.

"Exactly." Mizuki answered.

Yuuta leaned over Inui's shoulder and looked at the remote, and waited.

"Mizuki, explain the Yuuta what just transpired." Inui commanded.

Mizuki frowned and did as he was told. SURPRISINGLY.

"That being said, how do I get this thing to work?" Mizuki said, shaking the scepter disappointedly. "Did it not come with an instruction manual?"

Yuuta noticed that Mizuki was being far from gentle with the scepter and gently confiscated it from him. He displayed the proper way to use it, with a grand circular sweeping motion, and then handed it back to Mizuki. Mizuki chuckled warmly and thanked Yuuta. The two of them then began to converse.

Until Inui cleared his throat.

"Oh don't worry, Inui." Said Mizuki. "We weren't talking about YOU."

"It's still annoying." Inui said.

"Well, I was just inquiring as to how he knew how to properly use the scepter." Mizuki said. "And apparently, it used to belong to the king of the Elves three hundred years ago, but it was surrendered to us because—"

"I don't care." Inui said.

Mizuki only stared at Inui in response.

"I don't care." Inui repeated when he did not receive a response.

"I heard that." Said Mizuki.

"Just find everyone else." Inui commanded.

"Oh very well." Said Mizuki as he did an identical sweeping motion that Yuuta had displayed earlier, and The Eye suddenly swelled with fogginess. Inui and Yuuta leaned in to have a look, but they saw nothing as Mizuki stood there looking satisfied. "Well that makes sense!" he announced.

"What was it?" said Inui.

"Didn't you see?" said Mizuki.

"Obviously not." Said Inui. "I did not see, HENCE, I asked what you saw."

"Oh." Said Mizuki. "Just everyone else's locations."

Inui stood there silently.

"AND?" he said, his tone elevating slightly.

"WELL I SUPPOSE we should go and get them all together." Said Mizuki with a glare that suggested he was about to follow up with, "I AM KING HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO ME THAT WAY."

Yuuta, however, sensed a potential battle breaking out so he got in between the two and separated them. That Yuuta sure is smart and reasonable.

"The way they're split up should be expected." Mizuki said. "The remaining members of Seigaku are all together in the village. The members of Hyoutei are in the courtyard, likely plotting against us all. The twins and Fudomine are in the throne room. And Kirihara is in the stables by himself because no one likes him."

"I thought we shot Kirihara." Said Inui.

"I did too." Said Mizuki.

"All right, whatever." Said Inui. "I'll get Seigaku. Yuuta, you get Hyoutei. Mizuki, you get the random leftover people group. And then we'll all meet back at the stables where Kirihara is and then we'll all be together."

"That makes enough sense." Said Mizuki.

Inui and Mizuki nodded at each other and then walked in different directions. Yuuta stood there all like: "!" and finally chased after Mizuki so he could explain what had just happened.

Inui exited the castle and went straight for the little village that surrounded it. He immediately felt somewhat foolish for not asking Mizuki where his team specifically was, but he figured it wouldn't be too hard to find them since they were… you know. People he knew. And on his team.

Mizuki didn't have any trouble explaining what Yuuta had to do, and then departed for his throne room. Yuuta stood there for a second or two and finally wandered off to the courtyard where he would find the Hyoutei team.

"If Kabaji were here, our entire team would be here." Said Atobe.

"Aww…you miss Kabaji, don't you?" said Jirou, putting his hand tenderly on Atobe's shoulder.

But Atobe just smacked him.

"Seigaku's almost complete too." Oshitari pointed out.

"Yes, only Tezuka remains." Said Atobe.

"Aww…you miss Tezuka too, don't you?" said Jirou as he once again approached Atobe to put his hand on his shoulder. He was just smacked again because he clearly did not learn his lesson.

"I miss tennis!" said Gakuto.

"I hear you on that one." Hiyoshi agreed.

"I miss home…and my parents, actually." Said Choutarou as if he were at fault for missing home.

"Good point, Choutarou." Said Shishido. "We've been gone for so long. They're probably worried about us."

The team simultaneously bowed their heads in sadness.

"Ootori." Said Atobe. "Go and find Mizuki. Command him to tell us when Yuuta will be returning."

Choutarou sat there for a moment before standing up. "Can I ask him nicely instead?" he requested.

"Whatever." Said Atobe.

Choutarou nodded and left the courtyard, going back into the castle. A few minutes passed as the members of Hyoutei just sat there being foolish, until Yuuta suddenly entered.

"Oh look, he's back." Shishido observed.

Yuuta looked around for Choutarou, but discovered he was not present.

"Um…Ootori's not here." Said Gakuto.

Yuuta took a deep breath and put up one finger.

"Charades!" Jirou shrieked excitedly.

"Okay, okay!" said everyone as they eagerly gathered around to guess.

"There is a flaw in this game, though." Said Hiyoshi. "I mean… it's not like he can tell us we're right when we're guessing since he can't understand."

"We'll just have to do our best." Gakuto said.

"All right so, one word." Jirou said excitedly.

Yuuta put his hand to his ear.

"Sounds like." Oshitari said.

Yuuta made a motion like there was a surface in front of him, and mimed that this particular surface had four legs. He put things on this imaginary surface, and then waited for everyone to guess.

"Platform?" Atobe tried. "What rhymes with platform?"

"Nothing." Oshitari replied.

"We need more." Said Shishido, urging Yuuta to continue with gestures.

Yuuta got the hint and thought for a moment, then pretended to sit down in front of this imaginary surface he had created. He then proceeded to mime eating a meal.

"Eating!" said Gakuto.

"Eating…" Hiyoshi repeated. "Meeting, beating, seating, cheating, fleeting…"

"We have NO way of knowing if we're even on the right track." Said Atobe.

"I've got it!" said Jirou. "Draw a picture of it!"

He looked eagerly at Yuuta who was just like: "?"

"Here," Oshitari stood up and handed Yuuta a stick, then pointed at a small patch of dirt on the ground.

Yuuta nodded and proceeded to draw a picture that looked mostly just like a scribble.

"Yuuta can't draw…" observed Gakuto.

Yuuta looked up, POSITIVE that they understood what his picture meant.

"You know…this isn't working." Shishido concluded. "We should just get Choutarou."

"You know, we WOULD do that if not for the fact that we don't know exactly where he went." Atobe reminded him.

"If you just call for help then he'll come right away." Shishido said.

"You could have SAID that." Atobe reminded him.

Shishido shrugged.

"Jirou, call for help." Atobe ordered.

"HEEEEEEELLLLLPPPP!" Jirou screamed at the top of his lungs.

"Well, where is he?" said Oshitari after an elapsed time of about one second.

Suddenly, there was a WOOSH of air and Choutarou was standing before them dressed as SILVER MAN!

"Who is in distress?" he said frantically.

"It's Yuuta." Said Shishido.

Choutarou looked embarrassed. "Oh." He said. "Well, now I'm embarrassed."

"Don't be embarrassed, Choutarou!" Shishido said, feeling bad that he had played a large part in causing Choutarou embarrassment.

So Choutarou went behind a tree and changed out of his costume again, then reemerged to do his duty. Yuuta looked ultimately startled by the whole ordeal, but he'll get over it.

"Okay, so ask him if we're on the right track with 'eating'." Jirou said.

"No, Jirou." Said Atobe. "Just ask him what he wanted to tell us."

"Yuuta, what did you want to tell us?" Choutarou asked and then waited as Yuuta explained. "Yuuta says that we all have to go to the stables because everyone is meeting there since they've completed the mission."

"OH!" said everyone.

"It was a TABLE!" said Gakuto. "Obviously! Table rhymes with stable!"

"Are we on crack or something?" said Shishido. "That was so obvious."

"So Yuuta says hurry up." Choutarou said.

"Tell Yuuta to hold his horses." Said Atobe.

"Yuuta, Atobe says to hold your horses." Choutarou said.

"I wasn't SERIOUS…" said Atobe, slapping his forehead.

So after a bit of time, Hyoutei arrived in the stables where everyone else just so happened to already be. Isn't that both convenient AND grand?

"All right, everyone here?" said Inui, looking around. "Twenty-two? What a large and wholly unmanageable group."

"Just hurry up and take us to the next Universe!" Mizuki ordered.

Before Inui had to take the time to explain to Mizuki that they had to wait for the shining white light, said light appeared. Inui changed the channel and the massive group was transported to their next destination.

Whence they arrived, there was initial relief to discover that this place was normal. For the most part.

Of course, as Inui has previously pointed out, the more normal the Universe is, the more difficult it is to find people. GENERALLY.

They appeared in the middle of a street. Fortunately, there were no cars flying by this street because it was a quiet little neighborhood so they weren't run over.

"Hey look, Yuuta got to keep his gay Pegasus!" Eiji exclaimed.

"Who told you about Yuuta's gay Pegasus?" Inui asked.

"Taka did." Eiji answered.

"What?" said Taka. "He intimidates me and my horse."

"He as in Eiji or as in Yuuta's gay Pegasus?" Inui said.

Taka gave Inui THE LOOK.

"Okay, okay, I get the point." Inui said as if he were the victim.

"Perhaps it would be best if Yuuta asked his Pegasus to leave while in this Universe." Inui said, looking at Choutarou.

Choutarou gave him a questioning expression.

"Translate." Inui hinted.

"Oh right." Said Choutarou. "Yuuta, Inui says you should probably ask your Pegasus to leave because he makes Taka's horse uncomfortable."

"NO." said Inui. "That's not why. The reason is because this is a normal-ish type Universe and people will be disturbed to see a Pegasus."

"Oh." Said Choutarou, turning to the now disgruntled Yuuta. "It's actually because this is a normal-ish type Universe and it will bring too much attention to us and scare people."

Yuuta agreed and whipped out his magic flute and played the same cute little tune, which made Tenba immediately depart.

"You don't think we don't bring enough attention to ourselves even without Yuuta's Pegasus?" said Oishi.

"Well, we have to do what we can." Inui said.

"I also want to have a conversation with everyone concerning murdering me whenever you feel like it." Kirihara announced.

"Shut up, Kirihara." Said Atobe.

"Aw man." Said Kirihara, bowing his head in shame.

They decided to get out of the street because now a car WAS coming and they would prefer to not be flattened.

"What is our course of action?" Oshitari asked the general group. "We have no idea who we're looking for, and our only hint is that maybe the person is somewhere in this neighborhood."

"Mizuki, can't you use your scepter to find someone?" Inui asked.

Mizuki looked at his scepter that YES, he got to keep.

"No." he answered. "I don't know who I'm looking for so it won't show us anything useful."

"Well," said Inui. "In that case I suppose we must do the only thing we can do. All split up and knock on every door, hoping that someone we know might answer."

There was a heavy sigh from the general collective, but they knew Inui was right. AS USUAL.


	64. Band Universe

Channel 64- Band Universe

Well. Now it was almost night time when everyone met up back where they had first arrived.

"NO ONE found ANYONE?" said Momo, sounding appalled.

"This is outrageous." Said Atobe. "And you all checked your own personal blocks that we assigned?"

"Yeah, every single house we went to, someone came to the door and told us to go away!" said Eiji, pointing to himself and Oishi.

"Yeah, except for that house where no one came to the door, even though we definitely knew someone was home." Oishi nodded.

"WHY didn't you persist?" demanded Oshitari.

"Because we figured: WHAT are the odds?" said Eiji as he and Oishi both did an extremely flamboyant shrug IN SYNCHRO!!

"We're going back to that house right now." Said Inui.

"Aww…" said Eiji and Oishi. Clearly they were still IN SYNCHRO!!

So the huge group followed the Golden Pair to the house they had previously described. They all gathered at the front door, and Eiji once again rang the doorbell.

"You know, if I lived here and looked out the window and saw such a massive group of people…" Kamio began. "I don't know if I'd open the door."

"Well, that's only because you're a pussie." Jirou said.

Inui looked at his remote and saw the number go down to an eight. He kept this to himself, however, and started wandering around the yard, following the consistent beat coming from the garage.

"Hey!" said Kamio. "That was uncalled for!"

"Sh," Inui ordered, putting up one finger. "Do you all hear that?"

Everyone quieted down and listened. Eventually, they made their way over to where he was and put their ears against the garage and listened. It sounded like someone was playing drums. In the garage. IMAGINE THAT.

"Let's take a look in the garage." Ryoma suggested.

"Good call, Ryoma." Said Kirihara.

"Back off." Said Ryoma as he tripped down on something in the yard and fell on his face. EVERYONE enjoyed a good chuckle at his expense, and then they went to the garage door. They figured they were entitled to whatever they wanted, so Taka grabbed the handle of the door and lifted it up.

When the garage was only half open, the drum beat stopped. Wouldn't you stop if someone just suddenly invaded your home?

Taka let go of the door after it was open all the way, and they all paused when they saw the sight before them. Yes, there was a massive drum set. And yes, there was someone playing the drums. But no, it was not someone they expected.

"IT'S TEZUKA!" exclaimed Seigaku as they all had a temporary lapse in judgment and proceeded to leap over the drum set and ambush their captain with an hug so intense that it made the rest of the group feel jealous and left out.

When they finally were brought back to their senses, they got to their feet, adjusted their clothing and stared down at Tezuka who was only standing there with his usual face. You know, the one that goes : \

"Tezuka, we are SO glad that we found you." Said Oishi.

"I could see that." Tezuka said, adjusting his glasses and standing up.

And then they all had a relapse because he spoke, so they all hugged him again.

And, when they were finished with that hug, they helped him to his feet.

"Enough hugging." He ordered. "I can see that none of you have let your guards down even in my absence."

"Of course not, Tezuka." Said Fuji. "We were extra careful about keeping our guards up."

"What?" said Ryoma, but Fuji elbowed him.

Then Tezuka looked past his team at all the other people who were also standing there.

He gave a heavy sigh. "Will someone explain to me what's happening?" he requested. "And what has been going on for the past twenty-five days? And why you are all dressed in such an absurd way?"

"Of course." Said Inui. "Do you have ten minutes?"

"Why not?" Tezuka said.

Ten minutes later, Tezuka was all like: "Okay."

"So now it's your turn." Said Mizuki. "What sort of Universe is this?"

"What sort of Universe?" Tezuka repeated. "Well, I hadn't really considered it to be an alternate Universe. I had mostly just thought I was dead."

"You thought you were dead?" Kaidou repeated.

"Yes." Said Tezuka. "If I do not possess superior tennis skills, then I must be dead."

"Wait," said Ryoma. "Don't tell me you…Tezuka…"

"You're bad at tennis?" Atobe said finally with somewhat of a smirk.

Tezuka cleared his throat. "I _was_." He said. "But through hard work and determination, I have nearly re-mastered most of my skills."

"So you came to this Universe in which you're bad at tennis and then you re-taught yourself how to play?" Taka asked.

"I have had a lot of free time." Said Tezuka, sounding somewhat defensive.

"What have you been doing?" asked Shishido. "Besides playing tennis and the drums?"

"That's pretty much it." Said Tezuka with a sigh.

"What Universe is this?" said Hiyoshi. "This just seems completely random."

"Well, I _was _in a band." Tezuka said.

"You WERE?" everyone said.

"Yes." Said Tezuka. "But we broke up about…two and a half weeks ago. Or so. We had a disagreement concerning the Battle of the Bands Competition this Friday night."

"Battle of the Bands competition." Said Inui. "That is the mission."

"Did you get the mission already?" Gakuto looked surprised.

"No." said Inui. "But I'm learning to anticipate them."

Everyone gave him a questioning look, but he retorted with an expression that said: "WHAT? BACK OFF. I'M INUI!"

"So we have to get the band back together." Shinji suggested.

"By Friday?" said Tezuka skeptically. "You don't even know if that is going to be the mission."

"Friday…" said Inui. "Well, today is Saturday. That's enough time to get together a band, I think. Even if it's not the original one. We should start putting up posters."

"Wait, wait!" said Ryou. "We don't even know if that's going to be the mission!"

"Before we exhort TOO much effort, we should wait until we at least get the mission." Atsushi agreed

"When will we get the mission anyway?" said Tezuka.

"Once everyone is assembled." Inui answered. "So everyone from previous Universes and this Universe has to get together."

"Oh." Said Tezuka, as he looked at his watch. "Is it too late to call someone, do you think?"

"Why, someone else is here?" Inui said.

Tezuka nodded and then just sat there as if he didn't owe them any information.

"So you know someone else is here and you know how to get in touch with him but YOU'RE NOT?" demanded Atobe as he clenched his fist.

"I WOULD." Said Tezuka, his voice elevating slightly. "But it's getting late."

"Who is it?" Choutarou asked.

Tezuka rolled his eyes and didn't look too thrilled. "Tachibana." He answered.

No one really had a reaction.

But Shinji and Kamio had a reaction that MORE than compensated for everyone else's lack of reaction.

First they gasped, then confirmed Tezuka's statement, then they ran around the garage for a little while shrieking with excitement, loudly exclaimed Tachibana's name and then fainted.

"All right, tomorrow morning we'll get in touch with Tachibana." Inui decided.

"Tomorrow morning?" demanded Fuji. "Why do we always have to wait? Can't we just get in touch with him now?"

"Well," said Inui. "The Battle of the Bands competition isn't until Friday so we're going to have to wait until then anyway."

"But what if that ISN'T the mission?" said Fuji. "You don't know that it is. The mission could be something easy like…"

"Make a strawberry milkshake." Taka suggested.

Fuji looked at Taka who only shrugged.

"Well…sure." Fuji said. "It could be something like that."

"I agree with Fuji!" said Kamio, regaining consciousness in record breaking time. "I think we should go straight over to Tachibana's house right now and see him so we may find out what the mission is!"

"Freaks…" Kaidou said under his breath.

Now, since no one is partial to the idea of being murdered in their sleep by Fuji, they all decided to make their way over to Tachibana's house. Not really though, because they didn't feel as though everyone's presence was necessary.

So…Tezuka went because he knew where Tachibana lived. For him NOT to go would just be foolery!

Shinji and Kamio went because they're in love with Tachibana. There's no denying it at this point.

Choutarou went because everyone made him. After all, at some point they might require his services. And Shishido also went along too because he had already spent too much time without his doubles partner…I mean… he wanted to make sure no one took advantage of Choutarou's powers… I mean… he really wanted to stretch his legs and go for a walk.

"So it's Saturday…" said Choutarou thoughtfully. "That means it has been exactly one week since the last time you died, Shishido!"

Shishido considered this. "I suppose you're right." He said.

Tezuka leaned over and had this face that suggested he wanted an explanation.

"If we die in a Universe, everything resets when we go to the next Universe." Inui explained. "This also applies to injuries and clothing and anything else. We always go back to however we appeared in our Universe in the first place."

"So that's why you're all STILL dressed like that." Said Tezuka.

"Yes." Said Inui. "We change our clothes quite often, as a matter of fact. But we always end up like this again."

"So…" said Tezuka. "You were a pirate."

"A pirate captain actually." Inui corrected.

Tezuka had a stone face at that one.

"But," Inui quickly followed up. "I am in no way challenging your rights to captainship."

"I should hope not." Tezuka said with a glare.

"So I've been thinking about a title for this Universe." Said Shinji thoughtfully. "There's nothing really specific about it so we might as well just call it the _Tachibana _Universe, or the Universe That Tachibana Was In, or something along those lines."

Tezuka shifted his glare to Shinji.

"Or," said Inui. "Since both Tezuka and Tachibana were apart of a band, I'm assuming that this Universe's theme is having a band. So our best bet would be to call this the Band Universe."

"All right, fine." Said Shinji.

"Does every Universe NEED a title?" Shishido said as if it had suddenly started to offend him.

"Well, it's easier to refer to them later." Said Inui. "Like Shinji is from the Harry Potter Universe, and Kamio is from the Soccer Universe, or Mizuki and Yuuta from the Fairy Tale Universe… or the twins from the OMG Universe…"

"OMG?" Tezuka repeated.

"Opposing Musical Gangs." everyone chimed.

"Aha." Said Tezuka. "And what's with these two and the business suits?"

"Super heroes." Shishido and Choutarou answered at the same time.

"Are we almost at Tachibana's house?" asked Kamio, sounding a little whiny.

"Actually we're here." Said Tezuka, pointing at the house that was right in front of them.

So Shinji and Kamio freaked out again like sissies, while the rest of the group observed that all the lights were off.

"They're probably sleeping." Tezuka checked his watch again.

"Let's find his bedroom window and throw rocks at it until he wakes up." Shishido said.

"Pebbles?" Choutarou tried.

"Right…yeah, that's what I mean…" said Shishido.

They walked around the house aimlessly until Inui suddenly halted them as the counter went down to a seven.

"Oh seven, what a great number." Inui said, sounding satisfied as he pointed to the upstairs window he was standing in front of.

Everyone gathered some pebbles and started chucking them at Tachibana's window. It would have taken a serious dosage of Benedril to keep him from waking up, so within only a few seconds the light went on. Slowly, the window unlocked and then opened up. And, though it was tempting, no one threw a rock at Tachibana's face.

He looked down and appeared quizzical at first, but then he realized that Shinji and Kamio were there.

"Shinji, Kamio!" he exclaimed.

"TACHIBANA!" they shrieked so loudly that the others had to dive on top of them and cover their mouths to keep them from waking up the whole neighborhood.

"You have to sneak out and come back with us." Inui said in a loud whisper.

"What's going on?" Tachibana said.

"We'll explain on the way!" Choutarou called up.

Tachibana frowned, but he wasn't TOO opposed to finding out what the hell happened to his life.


	65. Pillars

Channel 65- Pillars

"All right, Yuuta, concentrate." Said Fuji as he held an apple up. "This is an apple. APPLE."

Yuuta stared at Fuji.

"Say it." Fuji commanded. "APPLE."

"Apple." Yuuta repeated in vain hope that maybe Fuji would leave him alone if he appeased him.

"Very good!" Fuji cheered.

"Don't you think it's a little pointless to teach him how to say apple?" said Mizuki. "It's not like he'll ever need to say apple. You should be teaching him phrases like, 'Where is the bathroom?' or 'Leave me alone' or something along those lines."

"Mizuki, if I wanted your opinion, I would have asked for it." Said Fuji as pleasantly as he possibly could while addressing Mizuki.

"I'm getting BORED!" said Gakuto to Oshitari.

"Sorry." Said Oshitari.

"You don't even care!" said Gakuto, crossing his arms grumpily.

"Oh no, I DO care." Said Oshitari, but no one could tell if he was serious.

Just then, the garage door opened again and all of their companions were there! Even Tachibana! And if there had been anyone from Fudomine who hadn't gone along to fetch Tachibana, he would have received a warm welcome. Instead, everyone was just sort of like: OK.

"Now we're all together." Said Tezuka. "What's the mission?"

"Sometimes it takes a few minutes." Said Inui as he sat down.

The entire huge enormous group crowded around Inui in attempt to see over his shoulder.

Inui sat there and looked back at the group.

"Not to be rude or anything," Inui faced forward again. "But your actions are making me feel quite claustrophobic and are in no way speeding up the process. I assure you I will let you know when we are receiving our mission."

But then the controller beeped.

"We are receiving our mission." Inui said.

The words formed, and the entire group read it together.

"_Participate in the Battle of the Bands Competition."_

Inui received some skin for anticipating that one.

"So it looks like we have to get our band back together." Said Tachibana to Tezuka.

"That is the LAST thing I want to do." Said Tezuka. "We should just audition for a new girl, a new base guitarist and a new vocalist."

"What instrument do you play, Tachibana?" asked Kamio with wide, eager eyes.

"Lead guitar." Said Tachibana proudly. But then he looked at Tezuka. "Wait, did you just say audition for NEW band members?"

"Why not?" said Tezuka.

"Because it would be easier to just get the old guys back together." Said Tachibana.

"Not really." Said Tezuka.

"Couldn't you just use a keyboard to take the place of a base guitar?" Choutarou asked.

"How so?" said Tachibana.

Choutarou waved it off. "It's easy." He said. "It has different settings. I've played around with the one I have at home before practice. No one could tell the difference. In a way, I actually think it sounds better."

Everyone stared at Choutarou.

"What?" he said awkwardly.

"Do you two have a keyboard?" Inui asked Tachibana and Tezuka.

"Yes." They answered AT THE SAME TIME. OMG THOSE TWO HAVE SYNCHRO JUST LIKE THE GOLDEN PAIR. But JK not really.

"You say you know how to play the keyboard?" said Inui to Choutarou.

"Maybe…" Choutarou said self-consciously.

"Why do you always have to deny everything you can do?" said Kirihara, sounding annoyed. "Whether it's your super powers or your ability to play the piano."

"Well, I just don't like being taken advantage of because of my powers…" Choutarou trailed off embarrassedly.

"But Choutarou, it's not because of your powers." Said Shishido. "They're using one of your actual skills that you've worked your whole life on. It would be just like if I asked you to use your tennis abilities to help me train to get back on the Regulars!"

"Shishido…you're right!" said Choutarou excitedly.

"Yeah, so don't worry about it!" Shishido said. "This time, you're not being taken advantage of!"

"When you put it that way, it makes so much sense!" said Choutarou.

"Should we…turn around or something?" said Mizuki.

"What?" said Choutarou and Shishido, looking confused.

"Never mind." Said Mizuki.

"And you two," Inui went on, pointing at Atsushi and Ryou who were just standing there like foolish twins.

"What about us?" they demanded.

"You two could take the place of the vocalist." Inui said. "You seem to be able to come up with songs on the spot. I'm willing to bet with rehearsal you won't sound half bad."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Atsushi's eyes narrowed.

"I think we're on the right track." Said Tachibana, rubbing his chin. "But there's one problem."

"What's that?" said Inui. "I'm sure we could get around it."

"The thing is… every band needs… A GIRL." Said Tachibana. "If we don't have a girl, we're not a real band."

"Too bad none of us are girls." Said Eiji, putting his hands on his hips. "Well, except Oishi and Fuji, of course."

Everyone looked at Oishi and Fuji.

"WHAT." They both said.

"All right, which one of you has always had a secret desire to be in a band?" Tezuka said.

"Oishi. Definitely." Fuji said immediately, pointing at Oishi.

"What?" demanded Oishi. "That's not true!"

"Then it's done." Said Tezuka. "Oishi, you are officially in the band as well."

"I don't want to be in the band…" Oishi whined. "I can't play an instrument, I can't sing, I can't do anything!"

"You don't HAVE to do anything, Oishi!" said Eiji. "All you have to do is stand there and look pretty! Oh! Can I be the Band Manager?"

"Um…sure." Said Tachibana.

"YAY!" cheered Eiji, getting WAY more excited than he should have.

"This could work." Tezuka said with a nod. "An assorted group of tennis players from various teams all coming better to contribute to a common good and complete the mission. TEAM."

He suddenly raised his hand and everyone looked at him.

"Don't be careless. We can't let our guards down."

He put his hand in the middle of the group. Tachibana followed suit, and pretty soon, everyone had put their hands in. Then they cheered and leapt up into the air, getting ready for a MONTAGE! Yes, a montage. Because if you thought for a moment we were going to write out all that practicing for almost a week then you are ON CRACK or something.

The song of choice is…"Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go." If you haven't heard this song before then I suggest you download it because it his hilarious and not its last appearance in this story.

So you all know what constitutes a montage. We get to see five or six different things that the characters are doing and their ability of doing such gets progressively better over time every time we visit them doing that certain thing. Every once and a while, a character walks up to a calendar and puts an X through the day, symbolizing that time has passed. And, by the time we reach the end of the song, the character that has been marking the calendar, for the sake of argument we shall say it was Eiji since he is the team manager, circles the targeted day. FRIDAY.

"It's Friday now." Said Tezuka. "We can't let our guards down."

"Why?" said Choutarou.

"It gets really competitive on this day." Said Tezuka. "Other bands may try to sabotage us if they know we are competing."

"Well, as it turns out…" Inui reported as he adjusted his glasses. "All we have to do is _participate _in the Battle of the Bands competition. The mission doesn't say anything about winning."

Tachibana and Tezuka only stared at Inui with this FACE. They were two totally different faces, but they were conveying the same look of shock and horror that Inui would suggest anything BESIDES victory.

"We'll see how it turns out." Said Ryou.

"Yeah." Said Atsushi. "If we win then great. If not, then whatever."

Eiji put the cap on his pen. "What was everyone else doing while we were in the midst of the montage?"

"Hm…" said all those present.

They went outside to the backyard where everyone was engaged in the most intense Ultimate Frisbee game of all time. Except for Fuji and Yuuta, though. They were sitting out and Fuji was STILL trying to teach Yuuta how to speak PROPERLY. Yuuta wanted to learn, but he really didn't like spending all that isolated time with Fuji. If he wanted to do THAT then he wouldn't have gone to St. Rudolph, ya know?

Tezuka cleared his throat and the Ultimate Frisbee group was promptly halted.

"I'll have you know that while you were all gallivanting here, we have been through a very intense nearly week long training montage." Tezuka announced.

"The competition is tonight!" said Eiji. "And everyone has to come and watch and support us! As Band Manager, I made t-shirts for everyone!"

He whipped out a large cardboard box and dropped it on the lawn as everyone gathered 'round.

"The band name is on the back." Eiji said, giving the six members of the band t-shirts.

"What IS the band name?" asked Ryoma.

"Pillars." Said Tezuka.

"The Pillars?" Ryoma repeated.

"No." said Tezuka. "Just PILLARS."

Everyone gave him a raised eyebrow in response, but they gave their attention back to Eiji.

"I also made them for everyone else AND I made them personalized so you could get your favorite band member on the front." Said Eiji. "I got three Oishis, three Ryou slash Atsushis, six Ootoris, two Tachibanas and four Tezukas."

"That's pretty random." Jirou said.

"No it's not!" said Eiji as he opened up the box. "The two Tachibanas are for Shinji and Kamio."

"YAY!" cheered Shinji and Kamio as Eiji tossed them shirts with Tachibana's face on the front and the word PILLARS on the back.

"Two of the three Ryou and Atsushi shirts are for Mizuki and Yuuta since they're on Atsushi's team." Said Eiji. "And the third one is for Kirihara because he's random and has no REAL friends."

"Wow. Thanks." Said Kirihara as he took a Ryou/Atsushi shirt.

"Three Oishis and four Tezukas." Said Eiji. "Just to be divided among Seigaku. Of course I'LL be taking one of the Oishis!"

Seigaku had a fight over who would get the remaining two Oishis and four Tezukas. In the end, Momo and Kaidou got the Oishis while Inui, Taka, Fuji and Ryoma got the Tezukas.

"And last but CERTAINLY not least, the six Ootoris are for everyone on Hyoutei." Eiji said, picking up the shirts with Choutarou's face on them and passing them out.

"Wow, Eiji, this must have cost a fortune!" said Choutarou, looking SO flattered.

"Yeah." Said Eiji. "I ordered a credit card by pretending I was eighteen and used it to buy the shirts. I figured I would be fine after we jumped Universes."

"Wow, Eiji." Said Oishi. "That is surprisingly evil of you!"

"Not EVIL!" said Eiji. "Just CUNNING!"

But then a problem suddenly appeared when Eiji was standing there with one more Choutarou shirt.

"All right, Hyoutei roll call." Atobe ordered. "Oshitari."

"Here."

"Gakuto."

"Here."

"Hiyoshi."

"Here."

"Jirou."

"Here."

"Ootori."

"Oh no..." Choutarou said. "Shishido is missing!"

Atobe paused and looked around. "So he is." He commented.

"What happened to him?" Choutarou looked ultimately distressed.

"He's probably just going to the bathroom." Said Kaidou but it's not like he knew better.

"This is all my fault!" Choutarou exclaimed, clenching his fist dramatically. "Whenever I get distracted by doing OTHER things whether it be saving the world, playing Quiddich or practicing for a Battle of the Bands competition, Shishido always get kidnapped!"

"I don't think Shishido got kidnapped, Ootori." Said Atobe.

"But Shishido ALWAYS gets kidnapped!" Choutarou exclaimed.

"He's got a point." Taka pointed out. "Shishido DOES always get kidnapped."

"God damn you Shishido…" said Atobe, realizing that this was true. "When I get my hands on him…"

"What?" said Shishido as he came out of nowhere.

Everyone stared at him.

"Where were you?" Atobe demanded.

"Um…using the bathroom." Shishido answered.

"Oh so you WEREN'T kidnapped!" Choutarou said happily as he hugged Shishido like it was his job.

"From now on, you must ask my permission to use the bathroom." Atobe decreed after Shishido had freed himself from Choutarou's super strengthed grip.

Shishido WOULD have asked why, but he figured it was a lost cause at this point.

--

**Merry Christmas, best friends ever!!**

**: DDDDDDDDDDDD**


	66. Afternoon Delight

Channel 66- Afternoon Delight

"I have to admit…I'm pretty nervous…" said Taka to the rest of the group as they filed into an empty place in the crowd while clad in their crazy t-shirts. "I mean… I'm not even performing!"

"Don't be nervous." Inui said. "It doesn't matter if we win. We just have to participate."

"But we'll win." Said Atobe as if he could see the future.

Mizuki held up his scepter and offered information about the future, but everyone collectively agreed that a little mystery in their lives might be exciting. Even though, when you think about it, the last thing these kiddos need is more excitement.

"Go on, Yuuta!" said Fuji. "Add something to the conversation!"

Yuuta stood there like a deer in the headlights as everyone stared at him.

"I…" he began, already sounding heavily accented even though he had only said a single syllable. "Like…apples…"

The others applauded for him, and they were soon accompanied by the rest of the people in the crowd clapping as well. Apparently, the band that was going right before Pillars had just finished and now it was time for them to set up.

"They were great!" said an announcer as he came out. "Let's all give a round of applause for our last band! THE PILLARS!"

He started clapping but suddenly Tezuka came onto the stage and whispered something to him. He listened attentively and then nodded.

"Excuse me," he said as Tezuka walked offstage again. "Let's all give a round of applause for our last band! PILLARS!"

Everyone looked a little confused but they started cheering anyway as the entire stage filled with smoke. The curtain raised as loud garage band music started playing and there they were. Atsushi and Ryou were standing in the front with their microphones with Tezuka right behind them on the drums. Standing off to one side was Tachibana on the guitar, and slightly behind him was Choutarou on the piano. Finally, Oishi was standing on the OTHER side. That's all. Just standing there.

Their loud garage band music continued for about a minute when all of a sudden it stopped. Tezuka raised his drumsticks and clapped them together a few times.

And, as abruptly as the garage music had started, a different type of music began.

"_Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight, gonna grab some afternoon delight," _Atsushi sang, snapping his fingers with the pleasant tune.

"_My motto's always been 'when it's right, it's right'," _Ryou continued. "_Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night?"_

"_When everything's a little clearer in the light of day and we know the night is always gonna be there anyway…" _they harmonized together.

The crowd was out of control excited and on their feet and jumping around like crazy people. Our heroes were looking quite confused and surprised, and sort of wished that they had paid more attention during the montage.

"_Thinkin' of you's workin' up my appetite," _Ryou sang.

"_Looking forward to a little afternoon delight._" Atsushi continued.

"_Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ignite, and the thought of lovin' you is getting so exciting. Skyyyyyy rockets in flight! Afternoon delight! Aaaaaaafternoon delight! Afternoon delight!"_

Suddenly, the stage and their instruments dissolved around them. They were in a pleasant park and were frolicking around in the sunlight. Bubbles! Hula-hooping!

"_Started out this morning feeling so polite_," Tachibana said to the group.

"_I always thought a fish could not be caught who wouldn't bite," _Choutarou sang along.

"_But you've got some bait a waitin' and I think I might," _Oishi sang.

"_Try nibbling a little afternoon delight_," Tezuka, YES TEZUKA, sang.

"_Skyyyy rocket's in flight! Afternoon delight!" _Ryou and Atsushi sang together.

"_Aaaaaaafternoon delight!" _they all sang together. "_Afternoon delight!"_

Then the real true frolicking began. While Ryou and Atsushi stood back to continue the song, everyone else (YES EVEN TEZUKA) engaged in a few rousing relays. Starting with dizzy bat.

"_Pleeeeeeease be waiting for me, baby, when I come around…"_

Sack races.

"_We could make a lot of lovin' 'for the sun goes down…"_

Egg on a spoon races.

And then the races stopped and they all came together in a large Pillary hug, walking through the park with their arms around each other.

"_Thinkin of you's workin' up my appetite, looking forward to a little afternoon delight. Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ignite and the thought of lovin' you is gettin' so exciting."_

Tachibana whipped out a Frisbee, and the game commenced.

"_Skyyyyyyyyyy rockets in flight!"_

And now the football.

"_Afternoon delight!"_

Choutarou made a fantastic catch.

"_Aaaaaaaaaaaaaafternoon delight!"_

Everyone tackled him to the ground.

"_Afternoon delight…"_

They all chuckled and rolled on the ground gaily. (HAPPILY. HELLO?)

The scene faded out and everyone was returned to the stage in their appropriate places as the last note was played. Then came the thundering applause as all members of Pillars bowed graciously.

"All right!" cheered the announcer as he came sprinting back on the stage just so he could feel like people were clapping for him even though they weren't. "Let's give our judges a few minutes and then we'll announce the winners!"

Everyone clapped again but contrary to the announcer's belief, they were not clapping for him but for the potential of the band they supported to be successful.

The massive group of Universe jumpers all reconvened backstage and, after some initial reactions to the rather original performance, they all started to wonder why there was an absence of a bright white light that was teleporting them to the next Universe.

"It said we only had to PARTICIPATE." Said Inui.

"Maybe we have to wait to see what the results are." Suggested Kamio.

"That's absolutely ridiculous." Inui said. "The only logical explanation is that we are missing someone. Everyone buddy up with the person from your Universe so we can find out who is not here."

Everyone immediately went to the person they had spent so much idle time with except, of course, Kirihara and Ryoma who thought it only fitting to pair up with each other.

"You know, it's not necessary to hold hands." Said Fuji to Mizuki since he was currently holding Yuuta's hand as if it were a matter of life and death. Yuuta was only standing there with an expression that suggested he was saying/thinking one of two things: 1) ! or 2) I like apples.

"I didn't ask for your opinion." Said Mizuki as he only got closer to Yuuta JUST so he could annoy Fuji.

Fuji's eyes narrowed. "You better watch your back, Mizuki." He threatened.

"Fuji, you're scaring me…" Oishi whined.

"Or you'll what?" Mizuki challenged.

"I'm sure you can look in your little crystal ball to figure that much out." Fuji said.

"ANYWAY…" Inui said, his tone elevating. "Who is missing someone?"

"We're all here Inui." Said Tezuka. "Just face the fact that we have to find out who won as part of the mission."

Inui double checked. Then he triple checked. Then he gave an exasperated sigh.

"I suppose I could have just looked at this." said Inui, taking out the remote. Sure enough, it still displayed the mission, which meant it was still incomplete.

"Besides, it's not like it will take FOREVER." Said Tachibana. "We've been here more than a month, we can wait five more minutes."

"HEY-YO!" screamed the announcer as he came frolicking back out on the stage. Everyone started cheering. (not FOR HIM, but for his future announcement.) "Out of the twenty bands that entered, we have chosen the first, second and third places so listen up!"

They all waited eagerly for his announcement as he quickly recapped the events that led them to this point.

"In third place!" he began. "Rip My Heart Out Because I Love You!"

"YES!" cheered an extremely emo band as they ran up to receive their cash prize.

Inui leaned over to look at Tezuka who appeared unaffected. Of course he was unaffected. Tezuka would never settle for third place anyway.

"In second place!" the announcer continued. "DUCK!"

There were more cheers as the aforementioned band stepped forth to receive their prize as well.

"They weren't even GOOD!" said Tachibana, sounding somewhat offended.

Inui leaned over to look at Tezuka who appeared unaffected. Of course he was unaffected. Tezuka would never settle for second place anyway.

"And now…" said the announcer. "The moment you have all been waiting for! The WINNER… of the Battle of the Bands competition… is…"

He paused for the dramatic effect but also because he wanted to spend more time in stage in front of people that he was pretty sure liked him, but the all hated him, especially since he was taking forever to announce the winner.

"Is…"

The members of Pillars leaned forward.

"Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiisssssssssssssssssss…."

They waited.

"PILLARS!" screamed the announcer.

"Well there you go," said Inui as he whipped out the remote as it stated COMPLETE. He quickly pressed the button as soon as the white light appeared, and they were immediately teleported to the next Universe.

For a few seconds, everyone stood there silently.

"Couldn't you have waited…FOUR SECONDS?" Tezuka said.

"What?" said Inui.

"We didn't even get a chance to bask in our victory at all…" complained Atsushi.

"Or receive our cash prize!" said Ryou.

"It wouldn't have mattered." Said Inui. "You wouldn't have been able to carry it with you to this Universe."

"What IS this crazy Universe?" said Gakuto.

They decided to take a few minutes to look around and take in what was in the area. Currently, it was nighttime in the middle of a little town.

"Look, another Universe where there's a giant scary castle off in the distance." Kirihara observed.

"Well, the castle didn't end up being evil last time." Taka said. "AND we ended up finding Hiyoshi and Shinji. So maybe we should just head towards it."

"But what if it's different this time?" Eiji gasped as he grabbed Taka's shoulders and shook him around. "What if there's an evil scientist in there who wants to kill us?"

Oshitari grabbed Eiji and slapped him across the face. "Get a hold of yourself!" he commanded.

"Ow…" Eiji said sadly and dejectedly.

"Yuushi!" said Gakuto. "You slapped him!"

"So?" said Oshitari, raising his eyebrow.

"Nothing…" said Gakuto as he sniffled. "It's just…it's just…" he suddenly burst into tears. "I THOUGHT I WAS SPECIAL, THAT'S ALL!"

With that, Gakuto buried his face in his hands and sprinted off.

Everyone watched him go.

"I think you should probably do damage control." Said Atobe to Oshitari, pointing in the direction that Gakuto had run off to.

"He'll come back." Oshitari assured himself.

"Oshitari, if you don't get him, then when we complete the mission, we'll have to find him later." Inui said.

"Oh very well." Said Oshitari, whipping out his magnifying glass and trotting off.

"While we're waiting, how about we wander around and search for information and people that are originally from our Universe?" suggested Mizuki as if such a notion would be a novel idea.

"Great idea!" said Fuji. "We'll go in pairs. I'll be Yuuta's partner."

Fuji grabbed Yuuta's arm and pulled him over close to him.

Mizuki gave a heavy sigh as Yuuta just stood there all like: "!"

"I'm not looking to be in a competition with you…" said Mizuki reasonably.

"Good." Said Fuji. "Because you'd lose."

"Look, why don't we just take turns…?" started Mizuki.

"I'll kill you." Fuji threatened, his eyes narrowing. "I'll do it."

Mizuki decided he was done negotiating, and took a step away from Fuji.

"I think that is a good idea though…" said Inui, eyeing them. "Let's split up and meet back here as soon in one hour. How does that sound?"

"EXCELLENT, INUI!" everyone shouted, giving him the thumbs up.

Everyone dispersed, and only Inui remained. He slowly turned his head and looked up at the castle, being unnecessarily dramatic. He stared at the castle, and said something under his breath, but no one was around to hear.


	67. Vampire

Channel 67- Vampire

"All right, so we've all essentially learned the same things from the locals." Said Inui once the group reconvened.

"There is a vampire in the scary castle and they want it slain." Shishido summarized.

"Yes." Said Inui. "So I suggest we do the job."

"Excuse me, but why?" Tachibana raised his hand. "I thought you said we had to receive a mission."

"I agree." Said Tezuka. "Why should we care whether or not these villagers are plagued by a vampire?"

"It might be important." Said Inui. "Besides, we'll only get our mission when we have collected up everyone who was originally from our Universe. I am getting quite skilled at establishing the mission before it is received, and my personal belief is that slaying the vampire will be our mission."

"And what if it isn't?" said Hiyoshi. "What if we all go up there and the vampire and his minions end up killing all of us? Then where will we be?"

Inui stared at Hiyoshi and then addressed the rest of the group. "Point taken." He said. "In that case, we'll send a small group up to slay the vampire. Any volunteers?"

Unsurprisingly enough, no one raised their hands.

"I propose we send up one person from each tennis team." Tezuka said, taking charge because THAT'S WHAT HE DOES. "So each team should elect a representative."

"OK!" said everyone to Tezuka as they immediately split into their tennis teams.

"Inui, you should go." Said Momo. "After all, it was your idea to slay the vampires."

"Hm…yes…" said Inui, looking slightly uncomfortable.

After a few moments, he turned around and looked to the other teams. "Have you all chosen who you will send? Hyoutei?"

"We chose Oshitari." Atobe said, shoving Oshitari forward a little bit.

"What?" said Oshitari, turning around. "I though you said you were going to go."

"I changed my mind." Atobe said, eyeing the scary castle out of the corner of his eye. "And as captain of this team, I make the decisions."

"I've already died twice, though." Oshitari pointed out.

"Well, that shows how bad you are at your job since we don't die." Atobe said. "So you deserve it."

"What about Ootori?" said Oshitari. "He would be the best one to send because of his super powers."

"Stop being such a chicken, Oshitari!" said Shishido since he wanted to protect Choutarou from being used again.

"Just go." Said Atobe.

Oshitari frowned, but he feared the consequences of defying Atobe's authority when they finally did get back to their own Universe.

"Fudomine?" Inui said once Hyoutei was finally all set.

"TACHIBANA!" exclaimed Kamio and Shinji as they bowed at Tachibana's feet. Tachibana only stood there as if that was totally normal.

"All right." Said Inui. "St. Rudolph?"

"We picked Yuuta." Said Mizuki.

Inui looked at Yuuta who was only standing there with this face that was just like: "."

"Does he know that?" Inui asked.

"Probably not." Said Atsushi.

"Why did you choose to put Yuuta in harm's way?" Fuji demanded.

"Because we thought it would be funny." Said Ryou.

Fuji stared at Ryou. "You're not on St. Rudolph." He said finally.

"Shh!" said Ryou.

"Finally, Rikkai Dai?" Inui said, looking over at Kirihara who was standing by himself.

"Um…" said Kirihara. "I elected myself…"

"That's good." Said Inui. "So the small team composed of myself, Oshitari, Yuuta, Tachibana and Kirihara will go into the castle. The rest of you should, in the meanwhile, continue to look around in the village for anyone recognizable."

Tezuka suddenly cleared his throat.

Inui looked over at Tezuka who looked disappointed.

"Oh…" said Inui quietly. "Unless Tezuka has other plans."

"No, that plan will work." Said Tezuka with a sigh of despair. He just wanted to be the one to say it first.

With the groups now established, Inui, Oshitari, Tachibana and Kirihara started making their way to the castle. Then they turned around, grabbed Yuuta by the arm and dragged him in too.

"Wait, wait, wait!" Yuuta called finally when they reached the steps.

They all turned around and looked at him.

He didn't know exactly how to convey his thoughts to them, so he just mustered up the most distressed face he could in hopes that they would understand that he was lost and confused.

"Just trust us, Yuuta." Said Inui.

Yuuta just continued to look distressed because he still didn't know what was going on.

And, even though in the long run it would have made more sense and saved more time, they decided not to send Yuuta back and, instead, coax him into following them. So they did and entered the giant castle with a creeeeeeak.

"Oshitari, use your detective abilities to locate the vampire." Inui said.

"Fine." Said Oshitari. "But if we're going to slay it, we're going to need a stake and a hammer."

"Why?" said Kirihara, raising his eyebrow.

"Because that's the only way to kill a vampire." Oshitari said in the DUH tone.

"Can't you just shoot him?" Kirihara said.

"No." said Oshitari. "Did you seriously not hear what I JUST said? Don't make me beat you up and take your lunch money."

"Let's stop arguing." Tachibana suggested.

"Don't make me take YOUR lunch money too." Oshitari threatened.

"Excuse me, but did you just THREATEN me?" Tachibana said, looking BEYOND offended.

Before Tachibana and Oshitari could engage in mortal combat, however, Yuuta uneasily came up in between them and lightly pushed them apart, looking apologetic.

"Sorry," he said.

"No, no." said Tachibana. "Yuuta is right. We don't have to be fighting right now. Thank you, Yuuta."

Yuuta just stood there like, "?"

"That being said," said Inui as if that pertained to the conversation. "Does anyone see anything that we could use to slay the vampire with?"

"How about this?" said Kirihara as he picked up a sharp piece of wood that was on the floor.

"Wow, that looks exactly like what I was looking for." Inui said, looking impressed.

Kirihara looked back at the floor. "Hm…there's a hammer here too." He observed, picking up the aforementioned object.

Then there was a slight pause as everyone looked at the spot where Kirihara was attaining his items.

"Oh look, here's some tattered clothing and a blood stain too." Kirihara said.

"I have a bad feeling about this vampire." Said Oshitari finally. "He seems quite treacherous. And look how upset Yuuta is…I'll take him outside."

"No," said Inui. "Yuuta looks upset because he doesn't know what's going on. You're just trying to get out of slaying the vampire."

"Pretty much." Oshitari admitted.

"Well, you're the only one with skills that are actually useful in finding the vampire." Said Inui. "This is the last time I leave it up to other people to choose the groups."

"Fine…" said Oshitari.

They followed Oshitari up the stairs and up some more stairs. Down twisting hallways and even a few secret passageways. It's a good thing Oshitari is such a badass detective.

Finally, there was a door with a large lock on it. They stared at the lock, and then Inui pulled out his shotgun and… well… he shot it.

Thankfully, the lock broke and fell off. The door opened on its own, creepily enough, and the group of five stared into the room.

All the windows were covered with cloth, but there was just a tiny bit of light from the moon peeking through one of them. The room was entirely dusty, and there was a large coffin right in the middle.

"I think we found the vampire." Tachibana inferred.

"You think so?" said Oshitari sarcastically.

They crept over to the coffin and stood over it.

"You slay him." Said Kirihara, trying to give the stake and the hammer to Oshitari.

"No way," said Oshitari, backing off. "You're already holding the stuff."

"Then you do it!" Kirihara said, practically throwing the items to Tachibana.

"I don't want to do it." Said Tachibana, giving the stuff to Inui.

Inui stared at the stake and hammer, and then turned to Yuuta. "Here you are, Yuuta." He said.

Yuuta was just all like: "?" as he watched everyone back up away from the coffin. As he turned back to face it, he found that the lid was slowly opening to reveal the cushiony red velvet on the inside and the mysterious vampire inside.

"Stop, stop, stop!" Kirihara yelled even though Yuuta wasn't even pretending to make the motion like he was about to slay a vampire. Kirihara practically dove on top of Yuuta to get him out of the way as the vampire sat up.

"Oh." Said Inui, taking a step forward as well as he looked at the remote, watching the number seven turn into a six.

"No, no, off off!" Yuuta said, pushing Kirihara off of him.

"It's…it's…" Kirihara's eyes lit up with sparkles and swirlies.

"Renji." Inui finished for him.

Sure enough, Renji turned around and looked at everyone whose job it was to slay him.

"Someone else from Rikkai Dai!" said Kirihara, since clearly that was his only concern.

"Oh." Said Renji. "Hello."

"Hi." Said everyone.

They were quite distracted by his vampire like appearance.

So no one really said anything. They all sat or stood there for a bit, waiting for someone else to go first.

"I hope you don't take this the wrong way or anything, but I am just SO happy that we have found someone else from Rikkai Dai!" said Kirihara randomly as he grabbed Renji and gave him a big team hug.

"Stop that." Inui commanded as he booted Kirihara away from Renji who was still just sitting there in his coffin as if he WASN'T a vampire.

"So…" said Renji.

"Someone explain to him what's going on, and then we can head back to everyone else, and then we can get the mission, and then we can go." Said Oshitari in a very impatient manner.

Inui opened his mouth to explain.

"We're hopping around to various Universes because of another one of your inventions." Said Renji.

Inui closed his mouth.

"You were going to say that, weren't you Sadaharu?" said Renji.

"Pst, hey," said Tachibana, leaning over to Kirihara.

"What?" said Kirihara.

"Is that a creepy vampire power that he has?" Tachibana asked. "To be able to read our minds or something?"

Kirihara looked over at Renji and Inui who were still staring at each other. (Though, actually, they might not have been. After all, we can assume that Renji's eyes are closed, and Inui's eyes might be closed for all we know. But let's all just pretend for a bit, all right?)

"You know…I think that's something he always does." Kirihara admitted finally.

"Am I right?" said Renji. "Were you going to say that?"

Inui just stood there.

"Yes." He said.

"I figured." Renji answered.


	68. Brutal Murder

Channel 68- Brutal Murder

"Just another hour or so and we'll have officially been trapped in other Universes for thirty-three days!" Eiji reported.

No one responded right away.

"Why are you bringing that up?" Oishi asked finally.

"Because it's a palindrome." Said Eiji. "Palindromes make me happy."

"Oh." Said Oishi as he mentally took a note of another thing that makes Eiji happy.

Just then, the people who were in the castle suddenly exited and came before the people who were outside the castle. It happened SO anticlimactically that a lot of people didn't even notice them. As a matter of fact, they probably wouldn't have noticed them if not for the fact that Fuji felt it necessary to enthusiastically exclaim Yuuta's name and welcome his return.

"So, judging by the fact that the vampire is here instead of being slain, I can assume you all decided to make friends with the vampire?" Gakuto suggested.

"Gakuto, this is Renji." Said Oshitari.

Gakuto looked blank.

"Yanagi Renji? From Rikkai Dai?" Oshitari tried.

Gakuto still looked blank.

"Don't worry about it." Oshitari said.

"Okay." Said Gakuto with a shrug.

"Is there anyone else we have to collect?" Kaidou asked Renji. "I mean, is there anyone else from our Universe that is also here?"

"Hm…" said Renji, crossing his arms. "Not as far as I know."

"We'll wait a few minutes and see if the mission appears, and if it does then we'll know that we're all set for finding people." Inui said.

"So, what's it like being a vampire?" Kirihara said to Renji.

Renji shrugged. "Vampirey." He answered.

"Oh." Said Kirihara. "Are you a legitimate vampire?"

"What do you mean?" asked Renji.

"Do you suck people's blood and shrivel up in the light and your weakness is garlic and that kind of stuff?" Kirihara specified.

"Yeah." Said Renji. "Pretty much."

Silence.

"Wait, yes to all of those?" Ryoma said.

"Yes to all of them." Renji said.

"Including the sucking the people's blood one?" Kamio said nervously.

"Well not all the time." Said Renji. "Only when I get hungry."

"Doesn't that bother you?" Mizuki said, sounding VERY concerned.

"It did at first." Said Renji. "But you get used to it. It's not that bad actually. If I didn't, I would die after all."

"When's the last time you ate?" Atsushi asked.

"Earlier." Said Renji. "I can only come out at night."

"So within the last few hours?" Ryou said.

"Yeah." Said Renji.

"So…IN THEORY…" Shinji started. "Assuming we find the remaining six people fairly quickly, like in the next few days, you won't have to suck anyone's blood again?"

Renji paused. "I'm not going to suck any of YOUR blood, guys." He said. "I mean seriously."

"Oh." Everyone gave a sigh of relief.

"I wonder if perhaps Renji really is the only one in this Universe we have to find." Pondered Tezuka because he's an "on task" type of guy.

"But it's been a while since we only found one person in a Universe." Taka explained.

"I'd rather it if we found more people in this Universe so we have to go to less Universes." Said Jirou.

"Jirou, you can't even talk." Said Atobe. "SOME people have been to several more Universes than you have."

"This is only my fourth one." Said Jirou as if that's what the point was.

"OBVIOUSLY I have been to the most Universes." Said Momo. "Considering I came from the first one."

Everyone frowned because Momo was right.

And Inui just didn't feel like arguing and adding that he too had been to the most Universes. For he was quite concerned with what had just appeared on the screen of his remote.

"What is it, Inui?" said Oishi. "The mission?"

"Maybe." Said Inui.

"Maybe?" said Tezuka. "What does it say?"

"Er…" Inui sort of trailed off. "It says that we have to slay a vampire."

"Kirihara, do you still have that stake and hammer?" Oshitari asked, not even missing a step.

"HOLD ON." Said Kirihara. "This is Renji we're talking about."

"He'll just come back to life in the next Universe, right?" said Choutarou. "I mean, I'm against killing, but if that's our mission, then it has to be done in order for us to get back."

"Wait." Said Renji. "I'd rather not be slain."

"I agree." Said Inui. "Slaying Renji would be rash."

"What do you suggest?" said Shishido. "Look at the remote. It is instructing us to slay Renji, so we have to slay him."

"No," said Inui. "The remote is not telling us to slay Renji. It is telling us to slay a vampire."

"Renji is a vampire." Shishido said, sounding annoyed.

"But there might be ANOTHER vampire we could slay." Inui said.

"Why does this even matter?" said Atobe. "WHY are we contemplating this? Even if there IS another vampire, we have Renji right here who will cooperate us and allow us to slay him so we don't have to go off and risk our lives to find another vampire that may or may not exist."

"Um." Said Renji. "I'd prefer NOT to be slain, so I don't know if I'm going to cooperate and allow you all to slay me."

"Dying's not that huge of a deal." Said Oshitari. "I've done it twice. It's not that bad, right Kirihara?"

"It's pretty rough." Kirihara said.

"That's not helping." Oshitari glared at Kirihara. "Shishido, you've died a few times, haven't you?"

"Er…two or three times." Shishido said. "Give or take."

"Right, and he says it's not that bad." Oshitari said.

"Sure, why not?" Shishido said.

"Still." Said Renji. "I don't have faith in my potential to return in the next Universe. If all has been explained to me correctly, then everything restarts when you go to the next Universe. However, if it is your mission to slay me then perhaps I will not restart."

"Don't be such a drama queen." Said Atobe. "You can join The People Who Have Died Club."

"Is there such a club?" Tezuka questioned.

"Yes." Atobe said. "I have started it right now. I would make Kirihara the president because he has died the most or been the closest to dying the most, but he is being rather counterproductive to our plan."

"Aw…" said Kirihara sadly. "I want to be the president of The People Who Have Died Club…"

"Instead, I am appointing Shishido the president." Atobe announced. "And Oshitari the co-president."

"I'm surprised you didn't make yourself the president." Shishido admitted.

"Of course not." Said Atobe. "I am supreme dictator."

"Oh." Said Shishido, rolling his eyes.

"Am I in said club?" Momo asked. "I can't remember if I've died or not."

"I think everyone from Ryoma and earlier has died, with the exception of Fuji and Oishi." Inui observed.

"AND EIJI." Said Eiji. "I haven't died!"

"And Eiji." Inui said.

"So, don't you want to join the club, Renji?" Atobe said.

"Not particularly." Renji admitted whole heartedly.

"Well, I've decided right now that you don't have a choice." Atobe said. "Who has that stake and hammer? Kirihara?"

"I gave them to Tachibana." Kirihara said.

"I gave them to Inui." Tachibana pointed at Inui.

"I gave them to Yuuta." Inui pointed at Yuuta.

Everyone looked at Yuuta who was sitting on the ground in his own little world. But then he felt everyone staring at him so he looked at to see that they WERE.

"What?" he asked.

"Where is the…" Inui started, but then he nodded at Choutarou.

Choutarou cleared his throat. "Where is the stake and hammer that you had back in the castle?" he asked.

Yuuta replied with a shrug.

Choutarou nodded and looked at everyone.

"I don't think he knows." Choutarou answered.

"OBVIOUSLY." Said everyone. And they may have dope slapped him if not for the fact that Shishido was there all protective like. And he had super powers. But that's totally secondary.

"Well it doesn't really have to be a stake and a hammer, does it?" said Kirihara. "It just has to be something pointy through the heart, right?"

"Something pointy through the heart should do." Oshitari said.

"Does anyone have anything pointy?" asked Hiyoshi.

"Wait, when did we decide that I was being slain?" Renji put his hands on his hips.

"The remote decided it." Said Gakuto. "And Atobe did too. And that's good enough for me."

"Look, Yuuta has an entire quiver filled with sharp pointy arrows." Fuji observed, leaning over Yuuta and making a grab for the arrows but Yuuta leaned back in order to rescue his arrows from his evil brother's clutches. "Now why did my little brother get to be the Elvin healer archer prince, while I was just a girl who is bad at tennis?"

"Face it, some Universes are better than others." Said Jirou. Then he slapped his knee. "Oh my god. Remember that time in the Ninja Universe when we got married?"

"I told you never to bring that up!" Fuji said, losing his temper far to quickly as he smacked Jirou across the face.

"I don't even want to know how much you two had to drink in order for that to go down." Said Mizuki.

"I'll kill you, Mizuki." Said Fuji. "I really will."

"Now, now." Said Atsushi. "Why don't we direct that aggression towards Renji and just be done with it?"

Renji was still standing there. And he was seriously starting to doubt his intelligence because he was still standing there.

"Look, Renji, I have sorted out all the possible alternatives in my mind and this is seriously the quickest and most efficient way." Inui said.

Renji nodded solemnly. "I suppose you are right, Sadaharu." He said. "But under one condition."

"And what's that?" Inui asked.

"I get to suck the blood of whoever slays me when I get hungry later." Renji said.

There was hesitant throat clearing.

"What?" said Renji. "It'll kill you. And remember, being dead's not that bad."

"Yeah well, that's sort of a pointless thing though." Said Kaidou. "We have to kill you to get to the next Universe. It's not like we're killing you out of spite."

"Still." Said Renji. "That's the only condition under which I will agree."

"If that is the case, I suggest we draw straws." Said Inui as he whipped out a bunch of straws from behind his back. "Whoever gets the short straw will slay Renji and, in turn, be slain by Renji when he gets hungry."

Slowly but surely, everyone agreed and took a straw. When their hands firmly grasped one, they all pulled and held up the straw.

"Who has the short one?" Inui asked, revealing that the straw that had remained in his hand was long.

Everyone looked around, and then all eyes settled on Jirou and his short straw.

"Perfect." Said Gakuto, putting his hand on Jirou's shoulder. "Here, you can use one of my ninja stars if you want."

Jirou looked uneasy.

"You know," he said. "I was against this whole slaying Renji thing the whole time!"

"No you weren't!" said everyone as they pushed him towards Renji.

"This is awkward…" Jirou complained. He stood in front of Renji who was like twenty-five feet taller than him, and then his head whipped around and looked at everyone waiting eagerly for him to do the business. "Do you all have to stand there and watch as I commit brutal murder?"

"Oh, sorry." Said everyone as they turned around.

They hummed and tried to ignore the sound of brutal murder occurring behind them. Finally, though it pained Inui so, he looked at his remote to see that it stated 'Complete'.

"Good thing…" Inui said under his breath as he pressed the button in response to the white light.

The white light engulfed them, and everyone was quite relieved to see that Renji was alive and well standing before him. Well, as alive as a vampire can be. After a few uneasy apologies, someone finally decided to point out that they were currently in a quaint little jungle.


	69. Jane

Channel 69- Jane

The morning came. And then there was a problem. Renji.

"Does it really hurt that much if you come into the sun?" said Kirihara as he looked up at what little he could see of the sun through the trees. Renji was standing in the depths of numerous shadows.

"Yes." Said Renji. "I die."

"Oh." Said Kirihara.

Hiyoshi leaned over to Shinji. "I dare you to cast _Lumos_."

"It's tempting." Shinji admitted.

"We'll just have to wait until nighttime." Inui said with a sigh.

"You did NOT just say that." Said Tezuka.

"I'm sure we can think of SOMETHING." Said Choutarou.

No one wanted to make the suggestion of just killing Renji and completing the mission while he was dead because no one wanted to be Renji's lunch later on. So, instead, they loitered around, trying to devise a plan to keep Renji from the unusually sunny day.

"How about…!" Eiji suddenly exclaimed as he jumped up into the air. Everyone turned around and waited, but Eiji soon looked dejected. "Never mind…"

They glared at him.

"Oh Eiji…" Oishi said in an endearing tone as he shook his head.

"Why do you put up with him?" Shishido said since he just so happened to be standing next to Oishi at the time.

"He HAS to." Said Fuji as he stood on the other side of Shishido. "They're the Golden Pair."

"Not only that!" said Oishi. "We're best friends too!"

"Best friends?" said Shishido with a raised eyebrow. "Are you sure that's ALL you guys are?"

"You're one to talk." Oishi said with a glare.

"What?" demanded Shishido. "You better not be talking about me and Choutarou!"

"You certainly knew exactly what he was referring to so quickly!" Fuji pointed out with a chuckle.

"Shut up!" Shishido said angrily.

"Hang on—" said Inui. "I never even noticed… the number on the remote changed to a five."

"It did?" cheered everyone.

"But…where…?" Inui said slowly.

Before anyone could even try to start looking around, they heard a mighty cry from the King of the Jungle. It was similar to the cry of Tarzan, and their attention was brought upwards to the top of the highest tree where there was a young man standing in a loin cloth and beating his chest like a gorilla.

At first, everyone just followed Yuuta's lead with having a face that looked like this: "?"

Then Ryou made an observation. "It's Kentarou!" he said.

"Who?" said everyone else.

Ryou couldn't respond in time because Kentarou in a loin cloth suddenly grabbed onto a vine and swung down right towards our heroes. Surely, they figured, he would land and they would discuss their mission.

No. That is not what happened.

Instead of landing, he continued to swing very close to the ground while still doing his jungle cry.

That's when Shishido, Oishi and Fuji all noticed that he was swinging right towards them.

"Holy shiiiiii—!" they all yelled as they dove out of the way.

There was a slight pause as Kentarou disappeared into the trees and his jungle cries got more distant.

Oishi and Fuji had both landed on the ground, and as they looked up, they came to the same horrible realization that everyone else had come to.

"He kidnapped Shishido!" Choutarou slapped his cheeks in horror. "I should have been protecting him!"

"He was on a roll too." Atobe said, looking disappointed. "Of not getting kidnapped, I mean."

"But…WHY DID HE KIDNAP SHISHIDO?" Choutarou was frantic now.

"Stop screaming and just go after him." Inui said.

"You're right!" said Choutarou as he got a running start and leapt up into the air.

Except he fell flat on his face.

"What…?" he said, sitting up. "Why can't I fly?"

Everyone gave an exasperated sigh.

"Oh no," said Choutarou with a slight whine. "What day is it?"

"Saturday." Inui replied.

Choutarou punched the ground, causing it to shake a little bit. "I can't fly on Saturdays…"

"You've flown on Saturdays before." Inui said immediately.

"Wait," Choutarou said. "I can't fly on Saturdays when my sidekick is more than twenty feet away from me…"

He took a breath and everyone waited.

"…AND someone blond is present." He finished.

"Wait." Said Oshitari. "So… on Saturdays, if there is someone blond around and Shishido is not within twenty feet of you, you can't fly?"

Choutarou nodded, looking ashamed.

"HE'S MAKING IT UP." Eiji said irrationally.

"I wouldn't lie about this!" said Choutarou, looking ultimately upset. "Not when Shishido is in danger!"

"Realistically, I don't think Shishido's in danger." Said Ryou. "I mean, this is Kentarou we're talking about, remember? What's he going to do?"

"Oh look at this." said Inui randomly. "We also got the mission."

"What is it?" said Kamio.

"_Rescue Jane_." Inui replied.

"Jane?" said Mizuki. "Who is Jane?"

"I don't know." Said Inui. "I've been here as long as you have."

"Hey, I know it's important to save Jane and everything, but can we save Shishido first?" Choutarou asked, sounding very much like he was pleading.

"Well, I think it would be best to locate Kentarou anyway." Said Inui. "He might know who Jane is."

"And we can rescue Shishido." Said Choutarou.

"YES. That too." Said Inui, sounding very short tempered.

They all started walking, but Renji cleared his throat from his shadowy sanctuary.

"Oh yeah." Said everyone. "Hm…"

Meanwhile, high up in the trees, Kentarou apparently decided that he was done swinging with the greatest of ease, so he came to a stop in a very large tree and dropped Shishido on one of the branches.

Shishido looked a little out of sorts and tried to collect himself and establish: Okay, I'm in a tree and there's someone who is sort of familiar standing in front of me with only a loin cloth on. _Uncomfortable…_

"Um…hey." Said Shishido with a slight wave.

"Um…hey." Kentarou copied him, waving as well.

Shishido made an uneasy smile and nodded just a tiny bit. "Okay…yeah…" he said.

Kentarou approached him very slowly, and Shishido put his foot out to stop him from getting any closer.

Kentarou pointed to himself. "Kentarou!" he announced.

"Yes, I'm sure…" Shishido nodded.

Then Kentarou pointed at Shishido. "Jane."

"What?" said Shishido.

Kentarou pointed to himself. "Kentarou," and then pointed at Shishido. "Jane."

"Wait, no." said Shishido. "I'm Shishido."

"Jane?" Kentarou looked confused, pointing at Shishido still.

"No," said Shishido. He pointed at himself. "Shishido."

Kentarou backed away a little bit.

"Jane." He repeated.

"No, god damn it." Said Shishido, looking frustrated. "Look, I was standing right in between two girls so what the hell?"

He thought for a moment.

"Well, I guess they're not USUALLY girls." He revised. "But they're more girls than I am…"

His pointless trail of thought was interrupted because Kentarou had suddenly appeared next to him and was attempting to cuddle.

This made Shishido feel uneasy, and his initial flailing reaction didn't prove to successful because he plummeted from the tree and started to tumble down to the ground, and just before he became a Shishido pancake, Kentarou grabbed his leg and caught him just inches off the ground.

"Let go." Said Shishido, flailing again.

But Kentarou did not let go. Instead, he only stared.

This made Shishido fume with rage.

"All right, that's enough!" said Shishido as he ripped his suit to reveal he was SILVER BOY and promptly reached into his utility belt and pulled out his spear in one swift motion.

However, in an equally swift motion, Kentarou grabbed Shishido's spear and wrenched it from him. Before Shishido could voice his anger for THIS gesture, Kentarou dropped him on his face, inspecting the spear instead.

Shishido scrambled to his feet.

"So you want to fight then?" he tried.

Kentarou stuck the spear into the ground and suddenly lunged at Shishido, knocking him back to the ground. Shishido found, however, that Kentarou was not attacking him and was, instead, hugging him.

"Jane…" Kentarou said.

"I…am not…JANE!" Shishido yelled, kicking Kentarou off of him. Shishido stood up as Kentarou regained his composure as well. "Look at me! Do I possess ANY feminine qualities whatsoever?"

Kentarou just cocked his head to the side and continued to look confused. Slowly, he began to approach again.

"If you touch me again, I swear it'll be the last thing you do." Shishido threatened, backing up at the same pace. "I don't know you, you smell bad and you're wearing a loin cloth. I could do without ever touching you again, thank you very much."

Suddenly, there was a loud sound from in the trees. Kentarou looked up all distracted an concerned, and Shishido took his opportunity to run like the dickens. Run like he's never run before!!

Kentarou looked back after being so distracted and was now angry that Shishido was missing.

Shishido dove behind a tree and breathed a sigh of relief.

But it was short lived once he realized there were people standing before him. Crazy people… with painful piercings… and war paint… and tribal masks.

Shishido immediately made a grab for his spear, only to come to the unfortunate realization that it was missing. Then he remembered that it had been taken from him. Woe is Shishido.

The crazy native in the front raised his crazy native stick and smacked Shishido on the head with it. Woe is Shishido AGAIN.

By the time Kentarou discovered where Shishido had run off to, both the natives AND Shishido had disappeared.

Woe is Kentarou!


	70. Jungle Man's Mate

Channel 70- Jungle Man's Mate

Far away and high up in the air, Yuuta, Inui and Oshitari were riding upon Yuuta's Pegasus. You know, the gay one.

"Hey Yuuta, this isn't getting your Pegasus hot, is it?" Oshitari asked.

"What are you talking about?" said Inui FOR Yuuta because clearly Yuuta could not understand.

"Having three males riding him." Said Oshitari. "I hope it's not pleasuring him sexually because that's not my bag."

"Shut up." Inui ordered.

Suddenly, Hiyoshi came level with the trio. He was riding on his broom, and Choutarou was seated behind him. And, as naughty as that sounds, GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER.

"Any sign of Shishido?" Choutarou asked.

"Not yet." Said Inui.

"Let's ask Gakuto." Oshitari suggested.

"All right." Said Inui as he tapped Yuuta on the shoulder. "Tell your Pegasus to land."

Yuuta looked at Choutarou.

"Inui says to tell your Pegasus to land." Choutarou translated.

Yuuta nodded and said something to his Pegasus in HIS LANGUAGE, and the Pegasus landed within a few seconds just as Gakuto came around a tree, panting.

"You know," he gasped. "You guys COULD fly a little slower."

"I thought you were a ninja that specialized in scouting." Said Inui.

"I am!" said Gakuto. "But it's hard to scout when I'm trying to keep up with you guys too!"

"Have you seen anything that would lead us to Shishido?" Choutarou asked.

"Not yet." Gakuto shook his head. "Did you find anything, Yuushi?"

"No…" Oshitari raised an eyebrow. "I don't even know why I was brought along."

"Because you're a detective." Said Inui.

"But I can't do any detective work while I'm flying through the air." Oshitari pointed out.

"Whatever." Said Inui only because he knew Oshitari was right and he didn't want to admit it.

Quite abruptly and out of nowhere, Kentarou dropped from the trees above them. Everyone was immediately on their guards in attempt to fend Kentarou off; Yuuta whipped out his bow, Gakuto took out some ninja stars, Oshitari pointed his gun, Inui drew his sword, Hiyoshi pointed his wand, and Choutarou looked quite ready to use every single power he had all at once, which might have very well been the end of the world as we know it.

However, Kentarou didn't appear interested in kidnapping any of them. He was only making desperate grunts while jumping up and down and pointing.

"Can you understand him, Ootori?" Hiyoshi asked as they all calmly put their lethal weapons away.

"He's talking too fast." Choutarou admitted. He looked back at Kentarou. "You have to slow down. I can't understand you!"

Choutarou paused and listened very carefully as Kentarou continued to grunt at him.

Finally, he turned to everyone else, paused a moment and then shrugged.

"What?" said Inui. "What did he say?"

"I don't know." Said Choutarou. "I don't think he's saying anything. I don't think it's a language."

"Well that's just great." Said Oshitari.

"How can you say this is GREAT?" demanded Gakuto. "This is HORRIBLE!"

Oshitari glared at Gakuto. "I was being sarcastic."

"Oh." Said Gakuto. "Never mind then."

"How are we supposed to communicate with him?" pondered Inui.

"Yuuta's pretty good at charades." Hiyoshi said, pointing to Yuuta who was still just chillin. Good thing he's so patient.

Finally Kentarou looked like he had gotten fed up with everyone just standing around staring at him so he finally grabbed Choutarou's arm and started pulling him along.

"I think he's going to lead us to Shishido!" Choutarou exclaimed.

Everyone else followed where Kentarou was leading them. He just took them to a large clearing and stood there, continuing his enraged sounding grunting.

"I am going to make a blind inference." Inui said. "And we will ride with that until we discover it is wrong. I imagine that he took Shishido to this place and now he doesn't know where he is."

"Shishido…" Choutarou whined.

"I'll take it from here." Oshitari offered as he started looking around.

"I'll help, Yuushi!" said Gakuto cheerfully.

Everyone started looking around, except for Yuuta who just stood there with Tenba because no one even told him what they were looking for, so he figured he didn't have to contribute.

"Well, we know Shishido was HERE…" said Oshitari. "We just don't know where he WENT."

"Well, here's Shishido's spear." Inui observed, pointing at the spear that was sticking out of the ground.

Kentarou ran over it protectively.

"Ootori, could you use this spear for your tracking power to find him?" Inui asked.

"I could!" Choutarou exclaimed as he ran over to grab the spear, but Kentarou was still protecting it. Choutarou would have no one standing in his way from rescuing Shishido, so he just batted Kentarou aside.

Kentarou landed in a heap and started to whine. "Jaaaanne!" he cried.

No one was paying attention to him because they were all overly distracted with Choutarou using his tracking power.

Except Yuuta, of course. He saw that Kentarou was whining the word "Jane" and he did recall Choutarou explaining to him what the mission was; to find and rescue Jane.

He went over to Kentarou and drew a big question mark in a patch of dirt. Kentarou sat up and brushed away the question mark, then drew a little stick figure that had recognizable Shishido-like attributes, such as his business suit and glasses. Yuuta nodded and gestured for Kentarou to continue.

Then Kentarou drew a group of other stick figures standing behind Shishido.

Kentarou made a motion with his hands that suggested picking someone up and then leaving.

Yuuta nodded and looked up at everyone else who continued to ignore them.

He couldn't think of anything that he had learned that would make a lot of sense for him to say to get attention, so he just said one of the first things Fuji had taught him, "I love my brother!"

We can all assume that Yuuta doesn't quite know the true meaning of these words, but it certainly got the others to turn around and look at him quizzically.

"Ootori," he said.

Choutarou came over to him, and then Yuuta proceeded to explain what he had recently learned from Kentarou.

"Oh…" Choutarou looked at the others. "Yuuta says that Kentarou implied that Shishido was kidnapped by a group of people."

"Well there's a surprise." Said Oshitari.

Choutarou looked back at Yuuta. "Well, now we at least know what to expect." He said. "I can use my tracking power to lead us there."

"Do we have to teleport?" Inui asked, sounding like nothing would pain him more.

"I can only use my teleportation power between the hours of nine and ten o'clock, remember?" Choutarou said as if that was information that everyone had handy and for Inui to forget was ridiculous. "But it shouldn't take us long to get there. It's not far."

"I wonder why Kentarou came to us for help." Said Gakuto. "I mean, he knew who took Shishido. Why wouldn't he just go get him on his own?"

"We still don't even know why Kentarou kidnapped Shishido in the first place." Hiyoshi pointed out.

"Does that REALLY matter?" Choutarou asked. "All that matters is that we get to Shishido and rescue him!"

"And then, after that, discover who Jane is and rescue her as well." Inui said. "With any luck, she may be in the same location as Shishido and we'll be able to rescue both of them together."

If only Inui knew how correct he was. For at that very moment, Jane AKA Shishido was awakening from his imposed slumber to find that he was in a small cage made out of trees and vines. His utility belt had been taken away from him, and even though he should have been suffering from at least a minor concussion, he sprung up immediately and grabbed the branches that held him into the prison.

And, just to continue to add to the sheer ridiculousness of it all, a crazy old man walked up to him seconds after he had awakened.

"I see you're awake." Said the native, though there was no reason for him to know OR speak the same language as Shishido. Let alone speak it so fluently and well.

"What's going on?" Shishido demanded. "Why have you brought me here?"

"There is a legendary prophecy in our culture." The old man began. "We must make a sacrifice to our God that resides in the volcano when the moon is at its highest in the night. Once the sacrifice is given, the volcano will finally sleep."

"I'M the sacrifice?" Shishido said.

The old man nodded.

"Why me?" Shishido said, sounding frustrated. (Well, wouldn't you?)

"Because the prophecy demanded a beautiful woman of high stature." The old man said. "And what woman could possible be higher stature than the mate of the Jungle Man?"

Shishido immediately stopped struggling.

"Excuse me?" he said. "Did you say woman?"

The old man nodded.

"Are you blind?" Shishido said. "I am OBVIOUSLY a man. And are you deaf too? I OBVIOUSLY have a man's voice. And are you stupid? I am not anybody's mate."

"You can try to fool us." Said the old man. "But we all heard the Jungle Man refer to you as 'Jane'. Therefore, you are his mate."

"I'll throw YOU into that damn volcano!" Shishido yelled, trying to reach through the bars, but the old man just walked away.

And we must force you to go to a meanwhile one more time in this chapter. We are very sorry.

"Well, I feel better." Renji said, daintily wiping some blood off the corner of his mouth with a napkin.

Everyone tried not to look because they had sorta just hoped that Renji could have had his meal without telling them.

"Maybe you should say a few words in Jirou's honor, Fuji." Said Mizuki.

"Why should I?" said Fuji.

"Well…" Mizuki shrugged. "He was your husband, wasn't he?"

Fuji's hand shot out to grab Mizuki by the neck, but Mizuki just dodged.

"Ha!" said Mizuki, backing away. "I saw that you would react that way in The Eye and prepared myself for that."

"Oh did you?" said Fuji pleasantly. "How does it feel to know exactly when and how you will die?"

Mizuki looked quizzical at first, and then spun around to gaze into his scepter again.

"Hey Renji," said Kirihara. "I have a question. Couldn't you just turn into a bat during the day so you wouldn't have to chill in the shade this whole time?"

Renji frowned. "Well, I COULD turn into a bat during the day." He said. "Though I don't know what good it would do or why being a bat would make me any less vulnerable to the sun than I am now."

"You certainly are high maintenance!" said Eiji.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Renji said.

"You only eat human flesh and you can't do anything during the day." Eiji answered plainly. "That makes everything quite difficult. I mean, up until you, everyone has been relatively normal with normal human needs."

"Except Yuuta." Atsushi added. "His lack of ability to communicate makes everything just that much more annoying."

"Yuuta can communicate just fine." Fuji announced. "I've taught him the essentials."

No one wanted to tell Fuji that he was wrong and a liar. Frankly, they were just freakin afraid of him.

"I sort of wish everyone else would find out who Jane is, save her and then come back so we can jump Universes again." Said Taka randomly as if that wasn't what EVERYONE was hoping.

"How long do you guys usually spend in each Universe?" Renji asked.

Everyone gave a ridiculous flamboyant shrug. There really was no rhyme or reason to it all.

Suddenly, the ground rumbled ever so slightly so it knocked everyone onto their arses.

"What was that?" Tezuka said, standing up and looking off in the direction of the giant mountain in the distance. Hm...


	71. What Shishido Wants

Channel 71- What Shishido Wants

"Ootori?" said Hiyoshi as the two of them zoomed along on his broom and the others followed on the Pegasus.

"Yes?" said Choutarou pleasantly.

"Why is it that Shishido gets kidnapped by anyone that happens to be walking by?" Hiyoshi asked.

"I thought we went through this already." Choutarou sighed. "Because I'm a super hero and he's my sidekick so bad guys kidnap him in order to make me more vulnerable by using him as a bargaining chip."

"But…" Hiyoshi started. "You know… Kentarou doesn't know that you're a super hero and he's not attempting to bargain anything."

Choutarou considered this.

"And," Hiyoshi went on. "The same thing with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. He just picked someone randomly in hopes that Harry Potter would come to rescue him."

"Oh I don't know!" said Choutarou. "He's just unlucky I guess!"

"I guess." Hiyoshi shrugged.

"There!" Choutarou suddenly yelled as he pointed at a small village at the base of a volcano. "That's where he is!"

They called to the others, and everyone landed in the trees right on the outskirts of the village where they met up with Gakuto.

"The trail left by the natives ended up here." Gakuto said.

"You didn't have to scout them anymore." Said Oshitari. "Ootori was using his tracking power."

"It's compulsive!" Gakuto said.

Just then, Kentarou dropped from the trees and landed next to them. He hastily paced the area and then gestured for Yuuta to come over. Yuuta pointed at himself confusedly and then went over to him. Kentarou then crouched down and observed very attentively.

"All right…" said Inui, maybe a little offended that Kentarou wasn't attempting to communicate with HIM. "While they're doing that, we should figure out where Shishido is."

"We should also keep an eye out for Jane." Hiyoshi said. "Whoever she is."

"That's true." Inui said. "She may be here as well."

"How should we go about this?" Choutarou asked.

"We could split up into groups of two and search the area," Inui started, but he happened to notice out of the corner of his eye that Yuuta was standing up.

Sure enough, HE WAS. Yuuta went over to Choutarou and tugged at his sleeve to get his attention.

"Yes?" Choutarou said pleasantly.

Yuuta then spoke to Choutarou for quite a while. Choutarou nodded and his expression changed from relief, to shock, to horror, to pure fear. Then, as Yuuta finished, Choutarou looked as though he was going to pass out.

"What is it?" Oshitari demanded.

"Yuuta says that Kentarou knew why Shishido was taken by the natives!" Choutarou said. "They plan on sacrificing him to the volcano!"

"Why?" said Gakuto, raising an eyebrow.

"Because they think that Shishido is Kentarou's lover." Choutarou answered.

Then he paused.

"Which he's not." Choutarou added hastily.

"Why would they think something like that?" Hiyoshi questioned.

"I have no idea because it's completely untrue." Choutarou said, but Yuuta tugged at his sleeve again. He proceeded to continue to explain things to him and Choutarou nodded. "Yuuta says that the natives are probably misinformed and are under the impression that Shishido is Kentarou's lover because Kentarou referred to him as 'Jane', and it is a fact that Jane is Kentarou's lover."

"Kentarou's like twelve." Said Oshitari. "He shouldn't have a lover."

"That's not the issue at hand." Said Inui. "This is very bad. If Kentarou doesn't even know the difference between Jane and Shishido, that means he hasn't met Jane yet, which means it will be very difficult to locate Jane."

Inui gave a heavy sigh.

"Well, I suppose we might as well start looking." Inui shrugged.

"What about Shishido?" Choutarou reminded him.

"Not important." Inui said. "The natives are going to kill him so it would be easier to just meet up with him in the next Universe instead of going through all the anguish of rescuing him."

There was an initial silence, and then Choutarou suddenly raised his hand and slapped Inui cleanly across the face. There was even a loud SMACK that echoed as Choutarou's hand connected cleanly with Inui's cheek.

Everyone gasped and took a step back, afraid to say anything as Choutarou and Inui remained completely frozen in their positions; Inui with his head turned to the side all dejected-like and Choutarou with a vengeful expression on his face and hand extended.

Finally, Inui took a deep breath and composed himself.

"Or we could save Shishido." He offered.

"Thank you." Said Choutarou, relaxing.

The group crept around the village, searching for any sign of Shishido. They all poked their heads around the a tree in height order so they were like a totem pole.

"Hey, where did Kentarou go?" Gakuto whispered, looking up and down to count everyone present.

"Beats me…" Hiyoshi answered.

"By the way, Inui, I'm sorry for hitting you." Choutarou said. "I don't know what came over me."

"It's all right." Said Inui as he caressed his red cheek.

"In case anyone is interested, Shishido's right over there." Oshitari said, pointing at Shishido who was sitting in his little cage, looking slightly defeated.

"He is?" said Choutarou as he leaned on the head that was underneath him and proceeded to push everyone into a heap on the ground since he was on the very top after all.

Shishido looked over because he head the commotion.

After everyone collected themselves, they ran over to Shishido in a style that was reminiscent of the Ninja Universe.

"Shishido, we were so worried about you!" said Choutarou as he grabbed the bars of the cage that held Shishido. Then he looked back at everyone who was just standing there as if they would rather be elsewhere. "Well, _I _was worried about you!"

"There's no time to talk right now!" said Shishido. "We have to get out of here! I don't know where the key is but it's probably not too far away so you should..."

He didn't have to finish because Choutarou had easily snapped the bars in half and threw them aside.

"That works too." Shishido said, stepping out of the cage.

Before anyone could say anything else, Kentarou suddenly came out of nowhere AGAIN, swinging through the air and grabbing Shishido around the waist and picking him up into the trees again.

"He kidnapped Shishido!" Choutarou yelled. "AGAIN!"

"I'm impressed that Kentarou can even lift Shishido so easily." Oshitari said.

They didn't have time to even continue their conversation because the natives came out of nowhere and threw their ropes up into the tree. The ropes wrapped around Kentarou and pulled him back down to the ground, forcing both he and Shishido to land with a KER-PLUNK!

Don't ask why they made that sound when they landed. They just did.

"Owww…" Shishido whined.

Since no one else was being proactive about the complicated situation as the natives approached the now handicapped Shishido and Kentarou, Yuuta took it upon himself to mount his homosexual Pegasus and land in front of the duo, his bow drawn towards the natives. He didn't have to verbally be able to communicate to understand that the natives were hostile.

The natives were taken aback by this crazy gesture and stopped advancing.

"Are either of you seriously wounded?" Inui said as he came over to where Shishido and Kentarou were.

"I landed on my ass…" Shishido said mournfully.

"But it's not broken, right?" said Inui.

Shishido raised an eyebrow. "Is it possible to break your ass bone?"

Inui looked contemplative. "I actually don't know."

As Shishido and Kentarou were standing up, a horde of gorillas stampeded by.

There was a bit of a hesitation as everyone jumped back and watched the random gorillas disappear back into the forest.

"Well that was ran—" Choutarou started but then he gasped and slapped his cheeks. "THEY KIDNAPPED SHISHIDO!"

"Jesus Christ!" said Oshitari, throwing his hands up in the air because, sure enough, Shishido was missing again.

"What do a bunch of gorillas want with Shishido?" pondered Hiyoshi.

But they were distracted from the potential pondering because Kentarou went running off in the direction of the gorillas. And then the natives watched briefly, and then quickly followed Kentarou.

Our remaining heroes looked at each other.

"Come on!" said Choutarou finally.

Everyone gave exasperated sighs and chased as well.

What followed was one of those intense chase scenes a hip sixties song plays in the background and a single object gets jumbled around, and that object was Shishido. They even stumbled across a hallway with several doors on either side and an amusing sequence of running through doors occurred. Between the gorillas, the natives, Kentarou and the group of heroes, Shishido was getting quite disoriented.

Then he was tired of it all.

He emerged from the door by himself, and looked around to see that all four parties were surrounding him and were just about to charge.

"STOP!" he yelled as he put his hands out.

Everyone stopped and stared at him.

He took a deep breath and tried to remain calm.

"Hasn't…" he began. "Anybody… just considered…ASKING me…"

He took another breath.

"…What _I _want?" he said.

Everyone's eyes welled up with tears. They were moved by Shishido's speech.

"He's right." Said Inui. "We should allow him to choose who he wants to be kidnapped by."

"Thank you." Said Shishido. "I think I deserve that much."

The other groups agreed whole-heartedly.

"All right." Shishido walked over to the group one would predict he would walk over to. "Let's head back and meet up with everyone else."

"Yes." Said Inui. "Let's."


	72. Temper

Channel 72- Temper

"Hm." Said Inui suddenly.

"Hm?" everyone said in response.

"I just so happened to look at the remote in vain hope that it would give us more information about Jane." Inui said.

"And?" said everyone.

"Well, the remote said we completed our mission." Inui showed them the screen that said "Complete".

The general reaction from everyone else was that of indifference.

"Okay." They said.

"Don't you think that's strange?" Inui said.

"Yeah, but does it matter?" said Oshitari. "Now we don't have to actually do the mission."

"I think we DID do the mission." Inui said, eyeing Shishido.

"What was the mission?" Shishido asked.

"To rescue Jane." Gakuto answered.

"Who's Jane?" Shishido raised his eyebrow.

Everyone stopped walking and stared at Shishido.

"WHAT." He said.

"I think YOU'RE Jane." Hiyoshi inferred.

"No I am not—" Shishido began but Kentarou leapt out from behind a tree and knocked Shishido to the ground.

"JANE!" he shrieked.

"Shishido IS Jane!" Choutarou said, sounding amused.

"No I am not!" Shishido pushed Kentarou off of him.

"I really think you are." Inui said.

"Even if I was… WHICH I'M NOT… why should it even matter?" Shishido demanded. "Maybe that stupid thing of yours is broken."

Inui stood there stone faced.

"Yeah." He said. "Or…you could be Jane."

Shishido almost threw a temper tantrum.

"All right, you know what?" he said. "Don't you think I've already been through enough today? Do you have to bother me about this?"

"…Yes…" said everyone.

"Guys, maybe we should just leave him alone about it." Choutarou said supportively.

"Thank you Choutarou." Shishido gave an exasperated sigh. But then he looked at Kentarou who was nuzzling his arm. "LET GO OF ME!"

Kentarou paid no attention and only held onto his arm tighter. Shishido tried to shake him off, but was not successful at that either.

"HEY!" he yelled at everyone else. "Are you all just going to stand there and watch me suffer or are you going to do something to help?"

"We already rescued you from being sacrificed to the volcano." Said Gakuto. "What more do you want from us?"

"Don't say that!" said Choutarou. "I'll help you, Shishido."

Choutarou attempted to pull Kentarou off Shishido but Kentarou just continued to hold onto Shishido's arm like he was being paid for it.

"Careful, you'll pull his arm out of the socket." Oshitari warned as he pointed out that Shishido was wincing in pain, but clearly not saying anything because he wanted Kentarou to be removed.

The last thing Choutarou wanted to do was cause Shishido pain so he stopped pulling.

"Don't just leave him there!" Shishido said, gesturing desperately towards Kentarou. "Why is he even acting like this anyway? No one else became a total freak! He's way too into the role!"

"It's likely Kentarou has gone completely insane." Inui speculated. "Just think. Do you recall when we arrived in the Cowboy Universe where we found Kirihara?"

"I wasn't there." Shishido said, looking annoyed.

"He was acting a little wonky." Oshitari confirmed because he was actually the only one present who had been to that particular Universe aside from Inui.

"Yes." Said Inui. "He had no contact with any other person for an entire five days, in addition to appearing in a place he had never been to with no one to explain the situation to him."

"So it's the same with Kentarou, except it's multiplied." Hiyoshi reasoned.

"Yes." Said Inui again. "He has been out of contact with any other humans for the past thirty-four days."

"That may be so." Said Shishido. "But I don't think it's all right for him to cling to me like this!"

"Just humor him." Said Inui.

"HUMOR HIM?" demanded Shishido. "You have no idea what he's ALREADY done to me!"

"Did he rape you?" said Oshitari blatantly.

There was a bit of a silence as Shishido turned and looked at Oshitari with this FACE.

"No." he said. "He didn't rape me."

"Because it's okay if he did." Said Oshitari. "You can talk to us about it."

"This is all MY fault!" said Choutarou as he nearly burst into tears.

"Choutarou, it's all right!" said Shishido. "He just harassed me."

"He…sexually harassed you?" Oshitari clarified.

"NO!" Shishido yelled.

"Because we can talk to him if you want." Oshitari said.

"Oh Shishido!" said Choutarou as he DID burst into tears.

"Look!" said Shishido. "Now you've gone and upset Choutarou."

"What?" said Oshitari as Shishido tried to comfort Choutarou while also trying to shake off Kentarou. "These things happen."

"And you make fun of me for wondering how centaurs have sex?" Gakuto said with a raised eyebrow.

Everyone looked at him quizzically.

"What does that have to do with ANYTHING?" asked Hiyoshi.

"YOU HAD TO BE THERE." Said Gakuto.

"I WAS there and I still don't get it." Said Oshitari.

"Because you were going on about…never mind!" Gakuto crossed his arms childishly.

"That being said, we should make it back to where everyone else is." Said Inui.

"That being said?" said Shishido, getting distracted from the task at hand so he could get offended again. "Why do you always do that?"

"Do what?" said Inui.

"When everyone is talking about something, you just change the subject to whatever YOU want to talk about while leading into it with 'that being said…' or 'while we're on the subject…' and act as though it's the same subject."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Said Inui, turning his back to Shishido. "But the fact of the matter is that the sooner we get back to where everyone else is, the sooner we can get to the next Universe and find the last five people and finally get home. All of this pointless argument is just taking up time. So let's go."

Inui DID have a point, so they all continued walking. Shishido tried to deal with Kentarou, but he finally got too uncomfortable (after an elapsed time of about five seconds) so he pulled a small trinket out of his utility belt and hit Kentarou over the head with it, knocking him unconscious.

As they put Kentarou's limp body on Tenba's back and started walking, Inui looked at Shishido quizzically in such a way that Shishido could FEEL someone was staring at him.

"WHAT." Said Shishido. "You would have done it too."

"No, it's just…" said Inui. "I didn't realize you had anything else in your utility belt aside from that spear of yours."

"Why?" said Shishido, raising his eyebrow.

"Because you only ever use the spear." Inui answered.

"I just like the spear, all right?" said Shishido. "What is this, Pick On Shishido Day?"

"It's all right now, Shishido." Choutarou said.

Meanwhile, back where EVERYONE ELSE WAS, they were all just chillin. Yes, like ice cream fillin.

"I'm getting kind of hungry again." Said Renji.

"You seriously JUST ate." Momo reminded him as he gestured to the mound of dirt. Everyone had been really bored and slightly disturbed with the corpse so they all worked together and buried Jirou after Renji had finished snacking on him.

"Yeah but I didn't get to eat as much as I wanted to because I was feeling awkward that you were all standing around." Renji admitted.

"Oh and killing another one of us would be any less awkward?" said Fuji.

"Well you all COULD have walked away for a couple of minutes." Renji said as if his request was totally reasonable.

"Why don't you just go over to Jirou, dig him up and then finish him off?" suggested Kirihara as if this conversation was completely normal.

"Well he's all dirty now because you guys had to go and bury him." Said Renji with a sigh.

Just when everyone was going to tell Renji that he just had to suck it up (NO PUN INTENDED!! WHERE'S DAVID WHEN YOU NEED HIM? HAW HAW HAW!!) the other group rounded the corner.

You know. With all those corners they have in the jungle.

"Don't worry guys, we rescued Shishido just in time!" said Choutarou as if everyone was probably sitting around wondering if Shishido was all right.

"NOW can we get to the mission?" asked Kaidou impatiently.

"Well, as it turns out," said Gakuto. "The Jane that we had to rescue was actually Shishido!"

"Shishido was Jane?" Atobe said.

"No!" said Shishido. "It was a glitch!"

"SURE it was Shishido." Said everyone as they collectively patted him on the head.

Then there was that ever familiar white light that everyone has grown to love.

They all threw their arms up into the air and cheered as they were engulfed, except for Renji who sizzled up and perished painfully, but luckily he was revived the moment they entered the new Universe.

"That was uncomfortable." Said Renji.

ALSO luckily, they appeared inside a building that happened to not have any windows that allowed light to shine through or else Renji would have had ANOTHER painful experience.

As a matter of fact, this place they were in happened to be a dance club. There were no dancers there, however, because it was midday and that would just be ridiculous. The entire building we empty, as a matter of fact. Well, it wasn't really empty anymore, considering the presence of twenty-six young teens, two horses and one extremely horny homosexual Pegasus.

Yuuta tried to urge Tenba not to pursue Taka's horse. Taka tried to move his horse out of range. Kirihara just sighed depressedly and gave his own horse a disapproving look.

"JANE!" shrieked Kentarou as he leapt at Shishido again but Shishido was on his guard, however, and stepped out of the way just in the nick of time, causing Kentarou to ALMOST tackle Choutarou (who was of course standing next to Shishido), but Choutarou was also on his guard since he is a superhero and probably saw it coming a mile away, so he too stepped out of the way so Kentarou continued to sail across the room right towards Hiyoshi, since he had been standing next to Choutarou since they're both on Hyoutei and they're both second years, but Hiyoshi was also on his guard since he is a wizard, whipped out his wand and zapped Kentarou with it, sending him flying to the other side of the room where he proceeded to go towards Jirou who was adjusting himself after coming back to life, but because of his mad ninja skills, he happened to notice Kentarou was coming and booted him back up into the air, where he continued to fly until he finally landed atop of…

Ryoma.

"HA HA HA HA!" laughed everyone as they pointed. And laughed.

And enjoyed that awesome run on sentence. JUST LIKE YOU SHOULD HAVE.

"Guys, don't laugh at me…" Ryoma whined slightly. His spirit was slowly breaking.

"ANYWAY…" said Inui.

"See?" said Shishido. "You were about to change the subject randomly again."

Inui glared at Shishido.

"We should attempt to find the location of whoever is in this Universe." Said Inui.

"Could we wait until night?" asked Renji.

"We could just split up again." Inui said.

"All right but I'm NOT going." Said Oshitari. "I ALWAYS have to go on our little adventures whenever we're looking for people or something."

"Well obviously." Said Inui. "You're a detective."

"So is Atobe." Oshitari pointed out.

"But I'm lazy, and I have the authority to force you to go instead." Atobe reminded him.

"We could pick the groups randomly like we did in the Vampire Universe." Mizuki said.

"But—" began Inui.

"Don't even bother." Said Mizuki. "I've already looked into The Eye and I know that's what we end up doing."

Inui paused. "Oh." He said. "Okay. Then let's pick a random group of… did The Eye specify how many people?"

"The Eye specified who was going, if you want me to just tell you that." Mizuki suggested.

"Fine." Said Inui.

"We send Tezuka, Kaidou, Ryoma, Shinji, and myself." Mizuki answered.

"WHY." Said Inui. "That group makes no sense. As a matter of fact, that group sounds like it would be quite counterproductive. I'M not even in it."

"Why do YOU have to be in it?" Tezuka challenged.

And of course Inui subdued to Tezuka's authority. And even though it was against his better judgment, he allowed the group of Tezuka, Kaidou, Ryoma, Shinji and Mizuki to leave the dance club while everyone else stayed behind.

8888888

**Hey y'all, there seems to be a TOUCH of confusion among some of the reviewers. Apparently there are two characters named Kentarou among the Prince of Tennis series. THIS Kentarou happens to be that captain from ROKKAKU. As in the first year captain with the practically shaved head. Yeah...you know, Aoi Kentarou. I don't know whose idea it was to make two characters have THE SAME NAME but...yeah. So. That's who we're talking about.**

**Thanks for reading this far everyone! We promise you won't be disappointed with the rapidly approaching ending! Won't it be fun to deal with all the post traumatic stress that these poor tykes are all going to have?  
**


	73. Red Convertible

Channel 73- Red Convertible

Tezuka liberated the remote from Inui after a brief explanation as to how it works. It was a no brainer though. Just look at the screen. There really was no reason for only Inui to hold it. He's just that way I guess. Then again, if I was Inui, I would definitely be like that too. But that would be because I'm Inui. IMAGINE THAT.

"Okay, so where do we start looking?" Mizuki said as he, Tezuka, Ryoma, Shinji and Kaidou exited the nightclub.

"Hm…" said Tezuka as he looked up at a giant billboard that had Yukimura's face on it.

He didn't really comment on it. He just continued to stand there until everyone noticed that he was staring at something. The first one to notice was Ryoma, and then Kaidou. After all, they're the most tuned into Tezuka's strange habits because they're on his team.

Mizuki tuned in next because he's A DATA TENNIS MAN.

And Shinji was sort of out in Candy Land for a good while before Kaidou took it upon himself to tap Shinji on the shoulder and point at the giant billboard.

"But I don't get it." Said Shinji. "All the poster has is his face."

"And the word 'Yukimura'." Ryoma pointed out.

"We should go back into the club and announce our discovery and Inui will know what to do." Said Kaidou.

Tezuka cleared his throat. "I don't think that will be necessary." He commented.

"Oh?" said the others.

"Oh." Tezuka repeated. "I'm sure we will be able to command this mission with great ease. Mizuki," he turned to the aforementioned tennis player. "That Eye of yours can see Past, Present and Future, am I correct?"

"Essentially." Mizuki answered as if it wasn't a huge deal.

"All you have to do is look into The Eye and see the Present for Yukimura and we can simply guide ourselves there." Tezuka explained.

"Hm…in theory that's a good idea." Mizuki said. "Unfortunately, all we'll get is an image of where he is. We won't get directions there or anything."

"We'll make it work." Said Tezuka BECAUSE HE WANTED TO BE IN CHARGE GOD DAMN IT!

But then his pocket started beeping.

Everyone looked at his pocket quizzically, so Tezuka reached in and recalled that he was keeping a magical remote control there. He looked at it to see that there was a big number 4 on the screen.

"Well look at this," he commented. "This is good news."

Abruptly, the 4 changed into a 3.

"That's even better news." Ryoma said.

Suddenly, a car drove up to them and stopped on a dime. The car was a red convertible and the top was down. There were two people in it, and those two people were dressed in top dollar brightly colored snazzy outfits. The two people raised their sunglasses and peered at the five standing on the curb.

Those standing on the curb, instead of raising their sunglasses, raised their eyebrows.

I'm just going to tell you right now that the people in the car were Yukimura and Sanada, though they were hardly recognizable because, as I previously mentioned, they looked super snazzy.

There was a general silence as a reaction on both sides.

Finally, Shinji was the first to speak. He pointed at Sanada.

"You're not old enough to drive." He said.

"It has been a month since we have had any indication that we are not completely insane and that is the first thing you say?" demanded Sanada.

Shinji shrugged and looked at the others. They sort of wanted an explanation too.

"Look, I have a driver's license." Said Sanada with a sigh as he pulled out his wallet and showed them that he did, in fact, have a driver's license. Yukimura was just sitting there looking content as the others looked it over.

"So this is a crazy Universe in which the driving age is only…" Mizuki began but then he peered closer. "Hey! This isn't real! According to this, you're over twenty!"

"Twenty-four, actually." Shinji observed. "This fake is really convincing. Where did you get it?"

"It's not fake!" said Sanada. "I checked up on it. I have a job too."

"You all seem to know what's going on." Yukimura said. "Can you explain it to us?"

"Sure." Said Ryoma. "That's what Inui does best."

They continued standing there totally silently and nodding their heads. Then they took the opportunity to look behind them and remember that Inui was not among them, retardedly enough.

"Oh right." Tezuka cleared his throat. "As it would happen…"

And so Tezuka explained the situation to Sanada and Yukimura. He even managed to incorporate the phrase, "Don't let your guard down," or something similar to it on three different occasions, and, "The pillar of Seigaku," only twice throughout his explanation.

"And why should we believe you?" Sanada said, eyeing him suspiciously.

They waited a couple of seconds, and quickly realized that unfortunately Oshitari was not there either, so Sanada remained UNSLAPPED.

It took only a second of coaxing from Yukimura to get Sanada to trust the others, and then the time came for questions.

"You mentioned you had a job earlier?" Kaidou said to Sanada.

"Yeah, I'm a manager." Sanada replied.

"For tennis?" was everyone's immediate reactions.

"No, for Yukimura." Sanada said, pointing at Yukimura who was still just sitting there looking happy.

There was a general pause, and finally Mizuki asked, "For when he plays tennis?"

"No, for his modeling career." Sanada answered.

"For his modeling career… and tennis?" Shinji tried.

"No, we have nothing to do with tennis in this Universe whatsoever!" said Sanada, sounding somewhat annoyed.

"You should have just SAID that." Said Mizuki. "Wait… modeling career?"

"I'm a model." Said Yukimura in a very airy and ditsy sort of way.

"Okaaaaaaaaaaaaay…" said everyone.

"Why isn't this remote telling us what the mission is?" said Tezuka since he couldn't care less about Yukimura's modeling career or that Sanada is his manager.

"Sometimes Inui presses buttons." Ryoma offered.

Tezuka tried randomly pushing some buttons.

"Okay, why didn't we bring Inui along again?" said Kaidou, crossing his arms and looking at Mizuki.

"It's what The Eye said!" said Mizuki.

"Could you look into The Eye and see what the mission is since completing the mission is in our future?" Shinji asked.

"Ah yes!" said Mizuki, pointing a finger up in the air. "I COULD do that!"

He proceeded to gaze into The Eye in a very dramatic fashion. The others leaned over his shoulder as he looked shocked, then amused, and proceeded to chuckle in the way only Mizuki knows how.

Unfortunately for everyone who was not Mizuki, they could not see anything except cloudiness.

Finally, Yukimura asked what it is he saw.

"Well," said Mizuki. "What lies ahead of us is a very long and arduous journey to complete the mission."

"What's the mission?" asked Tezuka.

"It will take a lot of effort, blood, sweat and tears…" Mizuki went on as if Tezuka had not interrupted. "And I'll tell you now that we're not going to have an opportunity to do anything truly enjoyable for a while."

"Sounds rough." Said Kaidou.

"What is the mission?" Tezuka repeated.

"You'll have to wait until we go back into the nightclub." Mizuki said. "Because the mission only appears when we're all together."

Tezuka turned around to go back into club since they were right in front of it, but Mizuki grabbed his arm.

"Hold on," he said. "Did you not hear what I just said about the arduous journey that involves effort, blood, sweat and tears?"

"…Yes…" said Tezuka. "Obviously."

"So what I'm SAYING…" said Mizuki. "Before we devote ourselves entirely to completing the mission, we should treat ourselves to a reward."

"Reward?" questioned everyone.

"Look!" said Mizuki, pointing at Sanada, Yukimura and their car. "We have the ability to drive in this fantastic car and no doubt Sanada and Yukimura are filthy rich and famous considering Yukimura's face is on that billboard!"

"That WOULD explain the billboard…" said Tezuka, rubbing his chin.

"So are you saying that you want to go for a spin?" Sanada translated for Mizuki.

"Basically." Said Mizuki.

Everyone looked at each other, shrugged, and then simultaneously leapt into the back of the snazzy red convertible.

So, remember in the Band Universe how there was a montage to the song "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go"? You downloaded it, right? Like we told you to? Well, if you didn't then you're missing out, because the song is back and now they are officially driving around and partying in a convertible TO THAT SONG. It was a very gay (AS IN HAPPY) experience for all of them.

Yes, it is true that they had absolutely no consideration for all the people waiting patiently in the nightclub, sighing and wondering when the others would return, in the company of Renji who creeped them out. But they obviously didn't care about that.

After they finished painting the town red, they decided that they were being more rude than they had originally thought. So, quickly finishing up their expensive coffees, they descended into the nightclub, pretending as though they had recently discovered the presence of Yukimura and Sanada.

"Why are all the Rikkai Dai people coming now that we're almost done?" demanded Kirihara, but he couldn't stay mad for too long because he realized that there were more Rikkai Dai people so he had to have a big group hug.

"Renji…what Universe did you come from?" Yukimura asked.

"One in which I am a vampire." Said Renji since he seems totally cool with the fact that he's a vampire.

"Oh." Said Yukimura. "That's interesting."

"And Kirihara, you're a cowboy?" Sanada inferred.

"Actually, an outlaw." Kirihara answered. "But pretty much."

"All right, enough with the reunion." Said Inui. "Mizuki says he knows what the mission is so he can explain it to us. Or we could look at the remote, Tezuka."

"I know." Said Tezuka, glaring at Inui as if to say, "I KNOW!" very loudly and with several exclamation points.

"I'm sure the remote can explain it better than me." Said Mizuki as he brushed a piece of dust of The Eye.

Tezuka cleared his throat and raised the remote, looking at the screen. "It says, 'Win the Team Walkoff'."

Sanada and Yukimura gasped dramatically, but everyone else just stood there looking like: Um.

"So maybe you two can explain?" Inui tried.

"A Team Walkoff…" said Sanada, looking like he was going to pass out because of an adrenaline rush. "It's a modeling competition between two teams of models composed of six male models and two female models. It's ruthless."

"It doesn't sound that bad." Said Kamio.

"Yukimura has no experience in that kind of thing!" said Sanada.

"And how are we going to compose a team of models for it so quickly?" Yukimura asked.

"Why, is there a Team Walkoff coming up soon?" Taka questioned.

"There's a big city-wide competition." Sanada answered. "Only the best Walkoff Teams are going to be there. To win it is…"

Sanada looked like he was at a loss for words.

"Impossible." Yukimura finished for him.

"We have to win." Said Inui. "Otherwise we'll never leave this Universe. When is it?"

"Next Friday." Sanada answered.

"Well, it's Sunday right now." Said Inui. "That gives us practically a week and a half to find some models."

"No," said Sanada. "By this time, all the best models are already in teams and if they're not, then they're not interested in competing in the Walkoff. The competition is dangerous. _People die_! That's why I didn't want Yukimura to compete."

"People die?" Shishido raised his eyebrow.

"It's going to be really difficult to leave this Universe I guess." Said Eiji. "If the competition is impossible to win… and we can't even enter because we don't have a team!"

"What if…" Tezuka began, and then he looked at Mizuki. "Mizuki, what did it say in The Eye? What is our next course of action?"

Mizuki smiled a somewhat evil twisted smile, and caressed his scepter in a confident manner. "Shall tell you exactly what it is The Eye told me?"


	74. Reality

Channel 74- Reality

"All right!" Sanada announced through a megaphone as he, Inui, Mizuki and Yukimura sat in an otherwise empty auditorium with a stage in front of them. Everyone else was standing on the stage looking awkward and awaiting instruction. "I want you all to strike the sexiest model-iest pose you can think of!"

"If we don't want to be models, can we sit down right now?" Ryoma raised his hand.

"No." said Sanada.

"But Ryoma, you're dismissed because you can't walk in a straight line to save your life." Inui said.

"All right." Said Ryoma as he went over to the steps to join the quartet in the seats only to trip over the stairs and tumble down them. Everyone laughed at him as he grumbled and readjusted himself.

"I don't particularly want to be a model either." Oishi admitted. "I was already in the band. Isn't that enough?"

"Actually," Inui looked at his clipboard. "As it turns out, the team must have two females in it, so you and Fuji are automatically on the team since… well… frankly… you're girls."

"It's all right, Oishi." Said Fuji, putting a hand on Oishi's shoulder since he looked as though he was going to burst into sensitive tears at any moment. They left the stage and joined Ryoma.

Inui circled Fuji and Oishi's names, and crossed out Ryoma's.

"Might I ask why you and Mizuki don't have to try out?" Kirihara asked, putting his hands on his hips.

"Because I have a patch." Inui answered, pointing at his patch. "So obviously I am not model material."

"And I looked in The Eye and saw that I'm one of the models chosen." Mizuki chuckled.

"Why can't you just look in The Eye and see which one of us are chosen so we don't have to go through this?" demanded Tachibana.

"Because it's more fun this way." Mizuki grinned.

"Enough of this!" said Sanada. "We're running out of time as it is. So our first elimination is going to be based on looks alone, no matter how shallow that seems. We four are the judges and each of us have chosen two people to eliminate already."

"I feel like we're on a reality show." Atsushi said to Ryou.

"I suppose that's what it's like in the world of models." Ryou sighed.

"Well, I thought of basics." Inui said. "I'm choosing to eliminate Renji because the flash of the cameras will kill him in his current vampiric state."

"Good call." Renji said with a nod as he descended into the seats.

"In addition, I'm also going to eliminate Kaidou, because I know for a fact that he would be far too awkward on a stage and would essentially fail." Inui said bluntly.

Kaidou looked annoyed at first, but he wasn't about to ARGUE because he didn't want to be a model. Inui nodded to Mizuki as Kaidou descended the stairs.

"I have chosen to eliminate Kentarou because he has no hair." Mizuki announced.

They all looked around.

"Where did he even go?" Mizuki asked.

"Oh, he was following me around and calling me Jane so I tied him up and locked him in the closet…" Shishido admitted.

"…Oh." Said Mizuki. "I'm also eliminating Tachibana for the same reason."

"Good." Said Tachibana. "Being a model was one of the last things I wanted to do right now."

"I'm eliminating both Oshitari and Atobe." Sanada said.

There was silence.

"…WHY?" said everyone.

Atobe looked like he was going to faint. He had been pretty much certain that he was going to be one of the models. In fact, if he didn't play tennis so obsessively, he would have pursued a modeling career. As for Oshitari, it was just a personal blow for him, because he had also thought of himself as model material.

"Because they're gray!" said Sanada. "Am I the only one who notices that?"

They all looked at Atobe and Oshitari.

"I guess we've all gotten kind of used to it." Eiji said.

"I am basically appalled." Said Atobe.

All attention went to Yukimura as he folded his hands and looked all dramatic. "Gakuto and Jirou."

"Why us?" Jirou sounded very distressed.

"You don't have the model body type." Yukimura answered.

"Are you saying we're short?" demanded Gakuto.

"Yes." Said Yukimura plainly.

"Oh." Said Gakuto, lowering his head in a dejected fashion.

"There is a conspiracy against Hyoutei." Atobe grumbled.

"All right." Inui stood up. "So far, Mizuki, Yukimura, Oishi and Fuji are all on the team. That means there are four more slots, and there are thirteen of you."

"So we are going to split you up into four groups and each group with be assigned a different judge." Sanada went on. "You will all get makeovers, and one person from each group will be eliminated after the makeovers take place, except for the group that has four people… that group will lose two people."

"This is DEFINITELY a reality television show." Said Atsushi.

With that, Tezuka, Taka, Eiji and Momo went with Inui. Shishido, Choutarou and Hiyoshi went with Sanada. Atsushi, Ryou and Kirihara went with Mizuki. Yuuta, Kamio and Shinji went with Yukimura.

Each group went to a separate mall. For our purposes, we'll assume that this particular city is mall crazy, so therefore there are four malls.

They went on shopping sprees, they got their hair done, they enjoyed good times and talked it up. All the while, the thought lay in the back of their minds that at least one person in the group was going to be eliminated whence they returned.

Speaking of returning, they eventually did. Once again all thirteen were forced up on the stage and put on display.

"Inui, who do you choose to eliminate from your group?" said Sanada. "You had to eliminate two people because there were four in your group, I hope you remembered."

"Yes." Said Inui. "It is difficult for me because everyone is on my tennis team, but I had to make a decision."

"And that decision is…?" Sanada led.

Inui cleared his throat and stood up, looking at his makeshift data book. "I have chosen to eliminate…" he took a deep breath as the four from his group looked slightly nervous. "Taka and Momo."

"Aw man!" said Momo as he took off the absurd beret he was wearing and threw it to the ground.

"Maybe it's better this way…?" Taka shrugged, taking off the pink, lacy girdle he was wearing on the outside of his clothing.

"WE'RE STILL IN THE RUNNING, TEZUKA!" Eiji shrieked as he practically leapt on top of Tezuka who only put out one hand and slapped Eiji aside. No one really knew Tezuka's opinion of the situation and he probably wasn't going to let anyone know anytime soon.

"Sanada, your turn." Inui sat down as Sanada stood up.

Sanada cleared his throat. "From the group of Shishido, Ootori and Hiyoshi… I have chosen Hiyoshi."

"Good." Said Hiyoshi with a sigh of relief.

"Let's keep this moving along…?" Sanada said to Mizuki.

"I believe Atsushi and Ryou have potential to be twin models, so I have decided to eliminate Kirihara." Mizuki said in passing.

"What?" said Kirihara. "That's hardly fair at all!"

But then he sorted out his priorities and realized that he didn't want to be a model anyway so he left the stage.

"Why does everything always come down to us being twins?" demanded Ryou but he was ignored.

"And last, but not least…" Mizuki gestured for Yukimura.

"Out of Yuuta, Kamio and Shinji, I have chosen to eliminate Kamio." Yukimura said.

Kamio gave a heavy sigh and shook hands with both Shinji and Yuuta. Yuuta was still standing there like: WTF SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT'S GOING ON!

"There are four slots left, and there are eight of you competing to get those spots on the team." Inui declared. "Each of the four judges are going to choose one of you to be on the team. First, we are going to explore possibilities to make a compatible team. Mizuki, would you care to explain your thoughts concerning the twins?"

"Who wouldn't love twin models?" said Mizuki, leaning back in his chair.

"He's got a point." Yukimura said.

"It's irrelevant though, because our hair is different." Ryou pointed out.

"We could fix that." Said Mizuki, whipping out a pair of scissors from behind his back.

"No way!" said Ryou. "I'm not letting you cut my hair! You cut Atsushi's hair, and it looks awful."

"It's not THAT bad!" said Atsushi as he whipped out a mirror and examined his hair. "Well…yeah…"

"If you won't cut your hair then you can't be a model!" Mizuki threatened.

"I don't care." Said Ryou. "I don't WANT to be a model."

"Fine then we're making Atsushi a model and not you." Mizuki said.

"Whatever!" said Ryou.

"It's official!" said Mizuki. "Atsushi is on the team!"

"Hey!" said Kirihara. "You said the only reason I was eliminated was because Atsushi and Ryou were going to be twins and crap! You can't let only ONE of them be on the team!"

"I just did." Said Mizuki. "Atsushi is my choice for the team."

Inui stared at Mizuki. "Is this choice based on your need to spite Ryou, or do you legitimately want Atsushi on the team?" Inui questioned.

"Hey!" said Mizuki. "I get to choose one person, and I chose him!"

"Very well." Said Inui with a sigh as he circled Atsushi's name.

"I think I have chosen someone." Yukimura said.

Everyone hung on his words.

"Yuuta."

Yuuta perked up at the sound of his name.

"I would have chosen him too, if I wasn't so distracted with the conflict between the twins." Mizuki commented.

"Your reasoning, may I ask?" Inui said.

"He's got an accent when prompted what to say," Yukimura said. "And his elf like appearance resonates beauty. Of course we must choose him."

"I couldn't have said it better myself." Said Mizuki.

Choutarou leaned over to Yuuta and explained to him what just happened. Yuuta argued a bit, but Choutarou assured him that he had no control over the matter and this was the way things are. Finally Yuuta hung his head like a dejected little man, giving into the forces that were more powerful than he.

"Oh no!" said Eiji, crossing his fingers. "Only two more slots left! I hope I get to be one of the models!"

Sanada and Inui consulted each other.

"Eiji, you're not one of our choices." Inui reported.

"Aww…" said Eiji, looking sad.

"What are the choices just so we can get this over with?" Shishido demanded.

"I chose you, Shishido." Said Sanada.

"Oh." Said Shishido, sounding surprised. "Even with my horrible haircut?"

Sanada nodded. "We can fix it. That's what we do."

"Congratulations, Shishido!" said Choutarou. "You must be so proud!"

Shishido tried not to look embarrassed or anything, BUT YOU COULD TELL HE WAS.

"And finally…" Inui adjusted his glasses. "My choice." He raised his data book and paused a moment. "Shinji from Fudomine."

Shinji didn't look thrilled, but he didn't look upset… as a matter of fact, his facial expression didn't change at all.

"But what about Choutarou?" said Shishido, sounding mightily offended. "He's much better looking than—"

He realized everyone was staring at him with a cruel smirk.

"IF YOU ASK OTHER PEOPLE!" he yelled, and quickly looked at the floor and crossed his arms in an overly animated fashion.

"It's all right, Shishido." Said Choutarou. "I don't mind! I'll support you from the crowd!"

"Whatever!" said Shishido since he was in a bad mood.

"So there we go!" said Sanada, standing up. "Thank you all for trying out. But the Walkoff Team is officially composed of…"

He looked at Inui's paper.

"Yukimura, Mizuki, Atsushi, Yuuta, Shishido, Shinji, Fuji and Oishi." He read.

"What's next?" asked Gakuto.

"Training." Sanada said. "Intensive training. Intensive… _model _training."


	75. Killing Spree

Channel 75- Killing Spree

"Shishido! Shishido!" Choutarou called as he fumbled around backstage. He found Mizuki who was doing his hair in a gigantic mirror. "Mizuki, have you seen Shishido?"

"Shishido?" said Mizuki, looking thoughtful. Then he shrugged and shook his head.

"Could you look in The Eye and find him?" Choutarou asked. "I want to make sure he wasn't kidnapped again."

"All right…" Mizuki sighed as he took out The Eye and waved it around. He gazed into the orb, and then his eyes widened. "All right, you know what, Ootori? I have no idea where he is. I'm going to go to the bathroom and don't follow me!"

Mizuki ran off as fast as he could.

"Why would I follow you into the bathroom?" said Choutarou as if that was the only thing he should have been concerned about.

So, because it would just be weird to follow someone into the bathroom, Choutarou resumed his search elsewhere and crashed into Sanada who was fretting about everything since he is the manager. "Sanada! Have you seen Shishido anywhere?"

"No…" said Sanada. "Not recently…why?"

"He's been missing since dinner!" Choutarou looked half distressed and half exasperated. "I guess you don't know this because you only just got here, but Shishido has this horrible tendency of getting kidnapped."

"Oh does he?" said Sanada. "We're on in just an hour. He has to get in wardrobe!"

"I'll go search for him!" Choutarou announced as he spun around and went to leap up into the air but he bumped into Shishido. "Shishido!"

"Choutarou, where are you off to?" Shishido asked.

"I was going to go find you!" said Choutarou. "I thought you had been kidnapped again!"

"Well I WAS." Said Shishido. "But I escaped."

"Oh." Said Choutarou. "You escaped…without my help?"

"Yup." Said Shishido. "Pretty good, huh?"

"…I guess…" Choutarou said, but he clearly did not agree that it was 'pretty good'.

"Well, I have to go get dressed!" said Shishido as he walked by Choutarou and Sanada and into the dressing room.

"Was Shishido acting strange just then?" Choutarou asked Sanada, only to find that Sanada had disappeared into the changing room as well. Choutarou went inside too because if he wasn't there then he would be the only one who wasn't in there and he just wanted to be cool.

"We have less than an hour before we go on!" said Sanada. "Is everyone ready?"

"I'm intimidated by Fuji's snake!" said Atsushi said, pointing at Fuji who had a large snake wrapped around him.

"I agree." Said Shinji. "Does he HAVE to have a snake?"

"Back off." Said Fuji, stroking the snake lovingly.

"Shishido, why haven't you gotten dressed yet?" Sanada demanded, looking at Shishido who was adjusting his utility belt.

"Because there's something I have to do…" Shishido said as he spun around to reveal that his eyes were swirling as he whipped out a giant mace from the utility belt. Everyone sort of gave him a questioning look as he swung it around above his head, and then he turned to the person who happened to be sitting closest too him, which was Shinji.

Before anyone could even react, Shishido used his giant mace to smite Shinji.

Everyone's mouths hung open in response and were unable to even say anything before Shishido discarded his mace, and whipped out a giant sledgehammer. His next target was Atsushi, and he crushed Atsushi's head underneath the hammer.

Still in shock, they could only watch in horror as Shishido pulled a large katana out of the utility belt and ran Oishi right through the heart, pinning him against the wall. By this time, Shishido was quite covered in blood, and then pulled out a gigantic machine gun and propped it up on the table. He aimed it at Yukimura and shot him until the bullets ran out.

Even Choutarou couldn't do anything as the spear came next out of Shishido's utility belt. Shishido lunged towards Yuuta with his spear drawn, but it was exactly then that Fuji came out of NOWHERE. He grabbed Shishido by his head and violently snapped it to the side, causing Shishido to drop to the ground in a heap, dead.

Choutarou gasped audibly as Fuji brushed his hands off looking satisfied. However, before Fuji could even inquire to Yuuta whether or not he was all right, Choutarou came out of nowhere as well, picking Shishido's spear up off the floor and driving it right into Fuji's back so it came out the other side.

Yuuta sat there looking shocked as Fuji's blood splattered on his face, and Fuji looked down at the spear pointing through him. Fuji stumbled slightly and then turned to Choutarou who was already tending to Shishido just in case he wasn't dead. As Fuji fell, he grabbed Choutarou by the head and snapped his neck as well, then collapsed to the floor, dead. Choutarou remained seated for only a few seconds before falling down next to Shishido.

"WHOA." Was the general reaction.

Yuuta wiped some of Fuji's blood off his face and looked at it. Then he burst into tears.

"What…just happened…" said Eiji, also looking like he was going to burst into tears as well.

Just then, the bathroom door flung open and Mizuki was standing there.

"GUYS!" he yelled. "I just saw in The Eye that—"

He looked around.

"Well." He said. "I guess I should have probably told you about this ten minutes ago." He noticed Yuuta was upset so he immediately ran to his side.

"Mizuki, do you know what happened?" Oshitari asked. "Do you know why Shishido went on a random killing spree?"

"Apparently he was kidnapped by an opposing team that was worried about our potential success and decided to eliminate us by brainwashing Shishido." Mizuki said.

"Brainwashing him?" Ryoma said skeptically.

"Yes." Said Mizuki. "A very effective method if I do say so myself. I don't know exactly what triggered his murderous rampage, but I'll say he pulled it off quite nicely, wouldn't you?"

"Why…?" said Momo.

"He was hypnotized into killing everyone on our Walkoff Team." Mizuki said. "If we don't have a Walkoff Team then that's one less team that can compete. No doubt many other teams are going through the same problems as we are right now."

"Why didn't you tell us this sooner?" demanded Tachibana.

"Yeah!" said Kirihara. "We could have avoided many deaths!"

"Once I found out that I was being targeted since I was on the Walkoff Team," Mizuki began to explain. "I hid in the bathroom like a coward. However, now, in retrospect, I'm thinking that maybe I should have said something to you all instead."

"YOU THINK?" said Sanada, slapping Mizuki upside the head. Then he looked at Inui. "These are fake deaths, right?"

"Right." Said Inui.

"So they'll all come back to life, right?" Sanada said.

"Right." Said Inui.

"Good." Said Sanada with a sigh of relief.

"But in case you haven't noticed, the only ones that remain on the Walkoff Team are Mizuki and Yuuta. Shishido killed Atsushi, Yukimura, Oishi and Shinji. Fuji killed Shishido, Ootori killed Fuji and in turn, Fuji killed Ootori."

"How does that work?" said Kaidou. "That is an ultimate paradox. Ootori can't die because he's supposed to be impervious and Fuji can't die because he's Fuji."

"This is a huge mess!" said Sanada. "I can't believe he killed Yukimura!"

"He killed several people, Sanada." Ryou pointed out.

Sanada took a deep breath. "What are we going to do?" said Sanada. "Our chances to win this thing were already extremely slim. Now we don't even have enough people to compete."

"We'll just have to quickly pick more people to compete." Said Inui.

"A makeshift team is not going to be able to beat the best teams around!" said Sanada.

"It's the only choice we've got." Said Inui.

"We don't even have any girls." Said Sanada. "We have to have two girls on the team."

Inui looked around the room. "We can make this work." He said, pointing at Ryou. "You. If we put enough make-up on him and dressed him right, no one would know the difference."

"I am NOT dressing up like a girl." Said Ryou.

"If you don't, we're holding you down and cutting your hair so you look like Atsushi." Said Mizuki.

"What?" yelled Ryou. He pouted. "What do I care? Everything resets when we go to the next Universe."

"We'll do it when we get back to our original Universe." Mizuki said.

Ryou looked quite sad, but he had no choice to agree after THAT threat.

"And Kamio…you could pass too." Inui said.

"What?" said Kamio. "Why me?"

"Come on, Kamio, for Shinji!" said Tachibana, clenching his fist dramatically.

"All right, Tachibana!" said Kamio just as dramatically.

"We need four more people." Sanada said as he and a few other people immediately started working on making Ryou and Kamio look like girls.

"I still think that I would make the best model here…" said Atobe with a sigh.

"He'll have to do." Said Inui.

"Have to do?" Atobe repeated. "Excuse me, but I would make THE BEST MODEL HERE."

"But you're gray." Said Sanada. "We could try to pass it off as artistic… as if we TRIED to make them look like that."

"Does that mean I'm in too?" Oshitari asked.

"Woo!" cheered Gakuto. "Go Yuushi!"

"Thank you for your blind support, Gakuto." Said Oshitari.

"What's that supposed to mean?" said Gakuto.

"I mean that you're only supporting me because we play doubles together." Said Oshitari.

"So?" said Gakuto. "Do I need another reason to support my doubles partner?"

"I suppose not." Said Oshitari.

"Two more…" Inui looked around somewhat frantically.

"Me!" cheered Eiji. "Pick me!"

Inui fought internally for a moment. "Very well, Eiji." He said.

"YAY!" said Eiji. "Tezuka, you should do it too since it was you and me at the end there."

"I think that would probably be our best bet." Sanada admitted.

"Very well." Said Tezuka. "But under one condition."

Everyone waited.

"We can't let our guards down."

"…Okay…" said everyone.


	76. Abaluutu

Channel 76- Abaluutu

"Guys, I feel so retarded!" whined Ryou as they stood next to the curtain, as ready as they were going to be before they had to go out and face the crowd. He had good reason to feel retarded because he was dressed up as a female, but he stopped whining when he received a glare from Kamio, and then a quick reminder from everyone else that AT LEAST HE WAS ALIVE.

Sanada was standing back biting his fingernails as a man who was dressed extremely outrageously (but it was so outrageous that it was stylish) walked over to him.

"So I hear your entire Walkoff Team was killed." Said the guy as he crossed his arms and looked overly smug.

"Abaluutu!" snarled Sanada angrily. "Where did you hear something like that?"

"Apparently six other teams suffered the same fate." Said Abaluutu.

"Isn't it strange that your team never seems to be targeted?" Sanada snapped.

"Maybe it's just because no one dares target us!" laughed Abaluutu. "We are four time champions at the Walkoff!"

"That's about to change," said Sanada. "Because a large chunk of my team may have been killed only an hour ago, but I got a replacement team!"

Abaluutu burst out laughing and then stopped. "Oh…you were serious?" he said with a chuckle. "Well, good luck then. You're going to need it."

He continued to laugh and walked away.

Sanada stood there fuming and shook his fist at Abaluutu. It took him a few minutes to even realize that Renji was standing right next to him all decked out in the most dramatic of clothing to shield him from any light whatsoever. Once Sanada felt his presence, he turned around.

"Oh, hi." said Sanada. "That guy is such a jerk…"

"Do you want me to kill him?" Renji asked.

Sanada looked shocked at first, but then he rubbed his chin, seriously considering Renji's offer.

"…Yes…" Sanada finished.

Renji swept past Sanada and then disappeared as Sanada nodded his head with satisfaction.

"We're about to go on!" Eiji called back to Sanada.

"Be on your watch!" said Sanada. "There's no telling what could happen out there!"

As the group of third hand models fearlessly went onto the stage, Sanada ran up to the curtain and proceeded to bite his nails so ferociously that his knuckles started to hurt. He practically started writhing around as he observed their horrible form and their utter failure in everything he had trained other models for so long. He knew they weren't going to win and was just about to commit suicide, wishing them the best of luck in this new Universe they were going to be stuck in, when Renji suddenly appeared behind him again.

Sanada looked Renji up and down, and then pointed at the corner of his mouth where there was still a little blood. Renji embarrassedly wiped it away.

"By the way," Renji said. "I thought up a plan."

"A plan for what?" Sanada asked.

"To make us win." Renji answered.

"That would have been nice to know about a week ago." Sanada said. "There's nothing we can do now."

"Actually, this is perfect timing." Renji said.

"What's the plan?" Sanada asked eagerly.

"You'll have to wait and see." Renji replied as he walked away.

Just then, Gakuto dropped from the ceiling, quickly followed by Jirou. They landed with ninja expertise and grabbed Sanada's collar, pulling him down to their height.

"Because our ninja instincts will probably never fade away at this point, we were obsessively stalking the area and we discovered that there are secret plans to sabotage Yuushi and the rest of the models as we speak!" Gakuto shouted.

"Shh!" Sanada hissed.

"DID YOU NOT HEAR US, MAN?" Jirou yelled as he shook Sanada around violently.

"Calm down!" Sanada said, wrenching himself from their grip. "How are they going to sabotage them?"

"They're going to open up a trap door that drops into a big tank of killer piranhas!" Gakuto said.

"Not again!" said Sanada, clenching his fist dramatically.

"We've got to stop them!" said Jirou.

Sanada, Jirou and Gakuto all sprinted to below stage where a couple of Abaluutu's flunkies were standing next to a tank of piranhas. They were cackling maniacally as they gripped a lever and looked like they were ready to pull it as the shadows of the team we all know and love moved across the stage above them.

Sanada could only stand there like a big ugly stuffed animal, but Jirou and Gakuto immediately took matters into their own hands. They wouldn't realize this until later, but it was pretty pointless to bring Sanada along. If anything, it was time consuming and counterproductive.

Needless to say, Gakuto and Jirou owned the flunkies and pushed the tank away from the trapdoor just in case. As soon as they finished, they heard the sound of the audience clapping, signaling that the performance was over.

"Oh no." Sanada slapped his forehead. "We're just going to have to wait until next year and practice as much as we can until then."

"No way!" said Gakuto, getting all in Sanada's face. "It has been forty-five days since I have been home or played tennis and I refuse to wait another three hundred and sixty-five!"

"Actually, I think this year is leap year, so it would be three hundred and sixty-six." Jirou said.

"Regardless!" said Gakuto.

"I don't have any control over it!" said Sanada. "We obviously didn't win!"

"Well let's at least go up there and support them as the judge makes the announcements!" said Jirou.

They agreed and went back upstairs, stepping daintily over Abaluutu's dead body with two distinct teeth marks in his neck. The Walkoff Team were all standing there looking impatient, as was everyone else who hadn't been on the team, but had been supporting them the whole time.

"You could have at least WATCHED us!" said Mizuki.

"I am so ready to be out of these clothes." Said Ryou. "And I don't care how dirty that sounded!"

"The judge is making the announcement right now…" Sanada leaned past the group.

The judge was remarkably pale and his eyes were wide. He was standing practically like a statue and he held the card in his hand that had the winner's name scribed on it. His head was sort of flopped to the side and there was a peculiar slight grin on his face.

"And the winners…" he said in a very creepy airy voice as he waved his hand in a very forced robotic rigamortis type of fashion. "The Team Sponsored by Maybelline."

There was a slight pause.

"That's…us…" Sanada clutched his heart and passed out.

"That's a horrible team name!" said Eiji, looking disappointed.

"We have to go out there and accept our prize!" said Atobe as he practically shoved the entire team back on the stage. The audience was looking quite perplexed, as were the rest of the judges.

Sanada sat up and put his hand on his head.

"How?" he said.

That's when Renji walked over.

"Yeah so apparently everyone whose blood I suck becomes my zombie slave." Renji said.

"Excellent job, Renji." Said Inui, adjusting his glasses. "Perhaps I would have thought up that idea if I hadn't been so concerned with avoiding touching your vampireness with a forty foot pole."

"Perhaps." Renji agreed.

"What happens now?" said Sanada.

"We wait." Said Inui, looking at the remote. As the Walkoff Team came off the stage, they were all suddenly engulfed with a white light (which killed Renji immediately but thankfully he will soon come back) and then disappeared when Inui pressed the button.

When they arrived in their new destination, there were a few blood curling screams as certain people ducked for cover, since the last thing they remembered was Shishido standing over them with a giant weapon. After a couple of seconds, they realized that that was no longer the case, and Shishido was NOT standing over them with a giant weapon, so after a quick explanation, they turned to Shishido and said plainly, "What the hell?"

"I didn't do it on PURPOSE!" Shishido yelled angrily.

"You crushed my head with a giant sledgehammer." Said Atsushi, taking it personally.

"However did we manage to win the Walkoff?" Yukimura asked Sanada. Sanada pointed at Renji and Yukimura nodded knowingly.

"I would just like to say a few things." Said Fuji as if it was all about HIM. "First, I'm so sorry your life was put in danger, Yuuta."

Fuji grabbed Yuuta and caressed him. Yuuta was sort of over his initial reaction of distress after several people dying in front of him and getting splattered in their blood, so he pushed Fuji away.

"Second…how DARE you put Yuuta's life in danger." Fuji said, undeterred by Yuuta as he turned to Shishido and pointed at him.

"I already said it wasn't my fault!" said Shishido defensively.

"And THIRD!" said Fuji, still undeterred as he turned to Choutarou. "How DARE you kill me!"

"You killed Shishido!" said Choutarou.

But clearly that excuse was not good enough for Fuji because instead of waiting for anyone to talk sense into him or restrain him, he grabbed both Shishido and Choutarou by their faces and proceeded to snap their necks.

Yuuta slapped his cheeks and everyone else gasped as the Silver Pair collapsed to the floor in a silvery heap.

"Fuji!" said Taka. "You just killed them! AGAIN!"

"Stop killing people!" said Atobe. "Especially people on MY team!"

"They had it coming." Said Fuji AS IF THEY DID. "Does anyone else have anything to say?"

"No, absolutely nothing." Said everyone as they backed away from him.

"JANE!" screamed Kentarou as he dropped to his knees next to Shishido and shook his fists at the heavens. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Everyone paused and then Fuji made a reach for Kentarou's neck as well, but thankfully everyone was more on their guards this time because they jumped on top of him before he committed another murder.

"Hopefully we won't need their useful abilities later." Said Inui, shaking his head at the dead Silver Pair.

With all that craziness out of the way, they looked around and found they were in a giant high tech hallway that winded around the corner. So, leaving the corpses behind, they started off down the hallway.

"Hopefully we'll find someone soon…" said Momo quietly.

They reached a giant door and could distinctly hear voices on the other side. They couldn't make out exactly what the voices were saying, but it certainly was clear that one voice was speaking more than the other. When they approached the door, it slid open.

"I know you're worried about what the Zagathyrns are going to do but—"

He stopped speaking once they heard the doors slide open. There were two large chairs in front of a control panel, and a large window that displayed the emptiness of space.

The chairs spun as our heroes were distracted with the sight before them, and both people leapt from their seats and had guns pointed at the large group. Everyone jumped back and put their hands up as a natural reaction, but after a few seconds, both parties relaxed.

"Usu." Said Kabaji, lowering his gun.

"Just what I was thinking, Kabaji." Said Sengoku, crossing his arms.


	77. Space Cowboys

Channel 77- Space Cowboys

"So you two fly around the galaxy and kill aliens," Inui said.

"Yes." Sengoku answered.

"And you are what they call 'space cowboys'." Inui went on.

"…Yeah." Sengoku answered.

"And right now you're on your way to the Planet Zagathyr which is located in the Daemin Star System."

"Basically."

"And—"

"Okay, it's my turn to ask some questions!" interrupted Sengoku. "WHY are there two corpses in the middle of my hallway?"

He angrily gestured towards Shishido and Choutarou's dead bodies.

"Fuji killed them." Tezuka answered, pointing at Fuji who was more interested in his perfectly manicured fingernails.

"I see." Said Sengoku.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"I know Kabaji, but if it's FUJI, we can't do anything about it." Sengoku sighed.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"I'm just as paranoid about their dead bodies as you are!" said Sengoku.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"Okay, okay. You're on the same tennis team as them. I'll give you THAT."

Sengoku shook his head and looked back at the group who all had mastered the art of the single eyebrow raise and were now staring at him with said eyebrows promptly raised.

"What?" he said.

"Did you just have a conversation with Kabaji as if he was saying something besides 'usu'?" Atobe asked, his expression bordering on the thin line between offended and shocked.

Sengoku looked at Atobe quizzically.

"What?" he repeated.

"Kabaji was saying 'usu' and you responding to him as if he was saying something else." Oshitari clarified.

Sengoku only continued to stare, and then looked at Kabaji who shrugged.

"I don't know what any of you are talking about." He said finally.

"That being said," Inui announced. "How long until we reach this Planet Zagathyr of yours?"

"When would you say, Kabaji?" Sengoku asked.

"Usu," Kabaji answered.

"Yeah, probably around then." Sengoku said with a nod. "But probably sooner."

Everyone gave them questioning looks.

"Soon then?" Inui inferred.

"Well obviously." Said Sengoku. "If it's sooner than an hour, then that's pretty soon!"

"Okay good, because the mission is for us to murder the Zagathryn king and conquer his planet." Inui said, holding up the remote.

"Lucky!" said Sengoku, doing a victory dance.

"WHY?" Eiji said irrationally. "There's no NEED for that!"

"Other than hopping Universes, finding the last person and returning home?" Momo crossed his arms.

"No, I mean… well, come on!" said Eiji. "Do we have to KILL him?"

"It says right here that we have to kill him." Inui said.

"Well fine…" said Eiji with a pout. "But only because I know Oishi wants to turn back into a guy so badly!"

Sengoku turned to Oishi, pointed and then laughed.

"Eiji, don't bring up the fact that I'm a girl!" whined Oishi.

"Well this is truly funderful and everything, but I am going to go and take a nap!" Jirou announced with a loud and flamboyant yawn. "Tell me when we get to the crazy Zaga-whatsit planet!"

"Did he just use the word 'funderful'?" Atobe said to Oshitari as Jirou walked away.

"Pretty much." Oshitari answered.

"Yeah and we have to pilot this thing through the Zagathyrn atmosphere." Sengoku said. "Feel free to explore the ship until we get there. Come on, Kabaji!"

Others began to depart as well until only Inui and Renji remained.

"So…" said Inui, looking at Renji.

"Yeah." Said Renji.

"Why are YOU hanging around Shishido and Ootori's corpses?" Inui asked.

"You first." Said Renji.

"I…um…" Inui looked a little embarrassed. "I'm going to steal Shishido's utility belt and attempt to find its secrets and establish how he manages to house spears, giant sledgehammers and the like in it."

"Oh." Said Renji with a nod.

"You?" Inui asked.

"Well," said Renji, looking ALMOST embarrassed. "I sort of had plans to suck their blood. I'm hungry."

Inui didn't respond at first.

"I didn't think anyone would mind since they're already dead." Renji defended himself.

"I won't tell anyone if you don't tell anyone I'm stealing Shishido's utility belt." Inui offered.

"All right." Said Renji. "It's a deal."

With that, Inui snatched Shishido's utility belt and promptly left the area as fast as he could so he wouldn't be witness to something horrifying that was about to occur in the middle of a hallway.

He found his Seigaku friends around the corner. As you have seen previously, our tennis playing companions all tend to segregate themselves according to their teams and there's no reason for that to change now.

"Inui, we're telling you right now that all of us have telepathically decided to send one person from every tennis team onto this planet." Tezuka said. "And when I say 'all of us', I mean the person with the most authority from each tennis team."

"Okay." Said Inui.

"So we are now going to take an anonymous vote." Said Tezuka. "Everyone wrote down their choice on a slip of paper and put it in this hat."

Tezuka handed Inui a piece of paper and a pencil. Inui quickly scribed the name of the person he chose and then dropped it in the hat. Tezuka took out the first paper.

"Inui," he read. Inui adjusted his glasses and got the feeling it was going to be him. Tezuka took out the next paper and his eyes narrowed. "Tezuka," he said.

The next two papers stated Inui and Tezuka again respectively.

"It's a good thing there's an odd number on our team." Said Inui. "I get the feeling it's going to come down between the two of us, Tezuka."

Tezuka glared at Inui and pulled out the next paper. He looked surprised. (Well, as surprised as TEZUKA can look.) "Oishi." He read.

"Oishi?" Oishi repeated.

"OISHI?" gasped Eiji as he fainted.

Tezuka pulled out the next paper. "Another Oishi." He said.

"Another Oishi?" Eiji said as he regained consciousness in record breaking time and then fainted again.

Tezuka pulled out the next three papers. "The remaining papers have Oishi's name on them." He said. "That means Oishi has the most votes."

"All right, who voted for me?" Oishi demanded angrily at his Seigaku companions. (Well, as angrily as OISHI can be.)

Everyone pointed at each other.

Meanwhile, with Hyoutei…

"Well, under normal circumstances, we would choose Ootori, but since he is dead, we must look to our second choice…" Atobe said. "…Which would have been Shishido. So we must choose between Gakuto and Oshitari."

"Why us?" said Gakuto. "We ALWAYS have to go on the little adventures. Jirou can do the same ninjaing stuff that I can do!"

"Because Jirou is sleeping." Said Atobe.

"But you should send him out of spite because of his recent usage of the word 'funderful'." Oshitari pointed out.

Atobe seriously considered this statement. "Hey…you're just trying to get out of going." He accused.

"It's true." Oshitari said.

"Why not?" said Hiyoshi. "It's not like he has a say in the matter."

"Stop speaking with that accent!" Atobe commanded. "Or I will send YOU!"

Atobe quickly got the cool back.

"I have come to the decision that you are all whiners… and _I _will go." Atobe said, striking a heroic pose.

"Okay…" said the remaining members of Hyoutei.

Meanwhile, with Rikkai Dai…

"I am glad there are more members of Rikkai Dai so I'm not in a group by myself anymore." Said Kirihara.

"Where's Renji?" said Sanada, looking around.

Just then, the door opened.

"Can we turn the lights off?" Renji asked.

Yukimura turned the lights off as Renji entered. "Where were you?" he asked.

"Um…nowhere." Said Renji, quickly wiping his mouth.

"We still have to decide who we're going to send to the planet." Said Sanada.

"I believe I should go." Yukimura said.

"But Yukimura!" said Sanada. "It's so dangerous!"

"Yeah, let me go." Said Kirihara. "I have weapons and stuff."

"I am the captain of this team." Said Yukimura. "And I feel bad that I died in my own Universe. And I sort of want to do something."

"But…dangerous…" was all Sanada could muster.

"How about we send Renji?" suggested Kirihara.

"The planet we're landing on revolves around five suns." Said Renji. "I would rather not."

"I'll be all right." Said Yukimura. "And besides, if something happens, it will all reset in the next Universe anyway."

The rest of Rikkai Dai looked overly dramatic, (especially Sanada) but it was impossible for them to argue with their beloved captain whom they loved, so they finally agreed.

Meanwhile, with St. Rudolph…

Mizuki and Yuuta were carrying on a conversation in elfish and Atsushi was only sitting idly by while staring at them with an evil squinty eye.

"HELLO?" he yelled.

"What?" said Mizuki, and Yuuta only sat there looking startled with an expression that could only be described as; "!"

"I'm sitting here too you know!" said Atsushi.

"Well think about it." Said Mizuki. "If I speak with you, then Yuuta will be left out! That hardly seems fair, don't you think?"

"We have to decide who we're sending to the planet." Atsushi reminded him.

"Oh yes…" said Mizuki. "You can go if you want."

"I don't want to go!" Atsushi complained.

"Fine, fine…" said Mizuki. "We'll send Yuuta then."

He turned to Yuuta and conveyed his notion to him in elfish.

Yuuta's eyes widened and he shook his head.

Mizuki gave a heavy sigh and looked back at Atsushi. "Very well," he said. "As manager of this team, I will take charge and go down to the planet myself."

"You're a saint, Mizuki." Atsushi rolled his eyes.

Meanwhile, with Fudomine…

Shinji and Kamio peeked their heads in the room where Tachibana was getting ready to go down to the planet.

"Tachibana…?" said Shinji as they entered.

"Yes?" said Tachibana as he turned around and a light shone behind him.

"We don't want you to go to the planet!" Kamio yelled as he and Shinji threw themselves to the floor and each grabbed onto one of Tachibana's legs.

"IT'S NOT FAIR!" they yelled.

"Calm down!" said Tachibana. "It's all right. Stand up."

They wiped away their tears and stood up.

"But…you shouldn't have to go!" said Kamio.

"I've already decided." Said Tachibana. "I don't want either of you to be put in harm's way."

"But we feel exactly the same way about you, Tachibana!" said Shinji.

"My mind's made up already." Said Tachibana. "I'm going to go to Sengoku right now and tell him I'm ready to go."

"We can't let you do that, Tachibana!" said Kamio as he and Shinji whipped out some chloroform and jumped Tachibana. It took their combined efforts to hold Tachibana down long enough for him to breathe in enough chloroform to pass out, and when he finally had, they both sat beside his limp body and wept profusely.

"Take care of Tachibana, Shinji!" said Kamio. "And when he awakens, make sure to tell him that this was for his own good!"

"I know, Kamio…" said Shinji as he dabbed his eyes with a hanky and caressed Tachibana in his state of unconsciousness. "Good luck killing the evil alien king of this planet."

"Thanks." Said Kamio.

Meanwhile, with Rokkaku…

"SHUT UP!" Ryou finally lost his temper and hit Kentarou over the head with a chair. Kentarou fell like a limp noodle and Ryou stood there breathing deeply like it was his job.

Then he stopped and frowned.

"I guess this means _I _have to go." He said, looking disappointed.

Just then, Sengoku's voice came over a speaker that apparently ran through the entire ship.

"Attention everyone!" said Sengoku. "We're about to land on the planet Zagathyr. Those who are accompanying Kabaji and I to the surface should report to the cockpit immediately! Over and out."

Ryou's frown deepened as he made his way towards the cockpit.


	78. Wardrobe

Channel 78- Wardrobe

"You all ready to go?" Sengoku said to his less than enthusiastic team of adventures.

Needless to say, they all looked less than enthusiastic.

"You know," said Sengoku. "You don't HAVE to come. Me and Kabaji were going to do this by ourselves if you hadn't all shown up."

"I actually WANT to come!" Yukimura admitted.

"Hm…" said Sengoku, looking Yukimura up and down. "I don't know if you're attire is really suitable for what we're planning on doing."

Yukimura looked at his designer outfit that came with the beret and the scarf and the sunglasses and the platform shoes and everything else that is completely outrageous.

"What do you mean?" said Yukimura, clearly not sensing the outrageousness of it all.

"All of you actually." Sengoku sighed. "Atobe, that trench coat is easily grabable. Mizuki, your expensive robes will not only get ruined but they'll get caught on things. Kamio and Ryou, your clothes don't cover enough of your skin and the harmful rays from the five suns will probably burn you. And Oishi…" he paused and stared at Oishi.

"Just don't even say it, all right?" said Oishi.

"I have to say it." Said Sengoku.

"Fine, then just say it quickly." Oishi crossed his arms.

"Okay." Said Sengoku. "You've got that… skirt thing. And that's just weird."

"Thank you for stating the obvious!" Oishi threw his arms up in the air and pouted.

"Well we can't do anything about it." Said Atobe. "Just because you're working the Han Solo look doesn't mean that you can act like you're an expert on flying spaceships and killing aliens."

Sengoku only stared at Atobe who was trying to pretend as though he didn't need to look at Sengoku… because obviously he knew that what he had just said made absolutely no sense. And, if it HAD made sense then he would have been completely wrong anyway.

"So right…" said Sengoku once he realized that he couldn't win in a game of staring Atobe down.

"What do you propose we do?" Mizuki asked.

Sengoku rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

Sengoku snapped his fingers. "That's right, Kabaji!" he said. "We DO! Everyone follow me."

Sengoku darted around the corner.

Everyone frowned at Kabaji who only turned around and followed Sengoku. After a few moments of standing there like fool children, Sengoku suddenly reappeared.

"HELLO?" he said. "Didn't you hear what Kabaji just said?"

"He said 'usu'." Atobe said, doing the quotey things with his fingers.

"Just follow me!" said Sengoku with an exasperated sigh.

So they did follow him as he explained their point of destination.

"Just a week ago we ransacked this race of aliens and stole a lot of stuff from them." Sengoku said. "And there was a giant wardrobe and I'm pretty sure we still have it on the ship!"

"You guys sound more like space PIRATES than space COWBOYS." Said Ryou.

Sengoku suddenly spun around and looked very serious. "Don't you ever say that." He warned. "I'm NOT going to tell you again."

Ryou backed off.

"Sorry…" he said.

"All right so here…" said Sengoku as he opened up a large door to reveal many goods that certainly appeared stolen.

No one was going to back Ryou up on the space PIRATE assumption, so they only entered and pretended they weren't thinking about it. Sengoku and Kabaji dug through the piles a bit and finally came across a couple of large trunks.

"Wardrobe," Sengoku pointed at the trunks. "And you could probably find some weapons around here too. Try to be fast."

Sengoku and Kabaji then stood outside the large room and waited patiently for the others to emerge.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

Sengoku burst out laughing. "Oh Kabaji!" he said. "You and your hilarious sense of humor!"

A few minutes passed and eventually everyone came out.

Mizuki had chosen a skin tight form fitting purple bodysuit with a giant pink ruffly rose on the chest that was all three dimensional. The others had begged him not to put it on, but once he saw it, he knew he couldn't wear anything else.

"What the hell." Said Sengoku. "That is a WOMAN'S outfit."

"I disagree." Said Mizuki, adjusting the flower.

Yukimura looked as though he had chosen several different outfits and thrown them all together to make one SUPER outfit that only a model would be able to pull off. The colors matched and it was flattering for his figure, but it was hardly more practical than what he had been wearing before.

"That is HARDLY more practical than what you were wearing before!" said Sengoku.

"I happen to like my ensemble." Yukimura commented.

Atobe had, like Yukimura, managed to mix and match several articles of clothing but he had decided to dress entirely in white. He looked very elegant yet still ready for battle. But the best part of all was that he had a fluffy white boa.

"Where did you get that boa?" said Sengoku. "There was definitely no boa in there. It will just get in the way."

"This was in there." Said Atobe sternly as he fluffed his boa. "And without the boa, the outfit is incomplete."

Ryou had discovered an outfit that looked almost identical to the one Sengoku was wearing except there were a few variations and the colors were different. Ryou had also discarded his baseball hat and located a massive and ridiculous cowboy hat.

"The cowboy hat is too much!" said Sengoku as he swiped the hat away and stomped on it.

"But I wanted to be a legitimate space cowboy…" Ryou whined.

Kamio was wearing a red shirt with a Star Trek insignia on it.

"Did you not notice the giant charred circle on the back of that shirt?" Sengoku asked.

Kamio looked over his own shoulder to see that there was, in fact, a giant charred circle there. "Just because the previous person who wore this shirt was shot in the back with a laser gun doesn't mean that I will be!" laughed Kamio. "I mean… this is Star Trek! I saw it… and I HAD to wear it!"

Finally…Oishi. He had changed out of his skirt and into a pair of pants. He kept the same shirt on and just put on a jacket over it.

"Way to be normal, Oishi." Said Sengoku. "Even though you're the one with the freak girl body."

"Way to give me a compliment and then ruin my life in the same sentence." Oishi cried.

"All right, you know something?" said Sengoku. "I want everyone except Oishi to change back into what you were ORIGINALLY wearing."

"WHY?" demanded everyone.

"Well, Mizuki is wearing a girl's form fitting body suit that is making me upset!" said Sengoku, unable to even look at Mizuki. "Kamio's wearing a cursed shirt with a giant hole in the back of it, Yukimura is going to trip over all the ridiculous things he's wearing and Ryou just WISHES he was me! And Atobe… you're going to get all those nice white clothes dirty."

"Maybe YOU just wish you were US." Said Ryou.

"WHAT?" said Sengoku.

"We're wasting time." Said Atobe. "Let's just go get this thing done quickly. We only have one more person to get after we finish this mission and I would like it very much if we just hurried up."

Sengoku looked like he was going to argue more, but Kabaji said, "Usu,"

"FINE!" said Sengoku. "You're right, Kabaji. Let's just do this. Did everyone grab weapons?"

They all held up their laser guns.

"Okay, let's go." Said Sengoku.

With that, they left the space ship while everyone waved to them from inside.

"All right, we need a briefing on this bad guy that we're murdering." Said Ryou. "Just so we know we're not killing him for a petty reason."

"If we were killing him for a petty reason wouldn't you kill him anyway if it meant changing Universes?" questioned Sengoku.

"Well yes," said Ryou. "But still."

"Hm…" said Sengoku. "Well I don't really know. I've actually never been to the Daemin Star System. You know, the five suns sort of turn me off."

"What made you come now?" asked Atobe.

"Because of the massive bounty he's got on his head!" said Sengoku. "How could I have said no to that?"

"Oh so this is all about bounty." Said Yukimura.

"No, it's all about changing Universes!" said Sengoku, sticking his finger up in the air.

"But it was ORIGINALLY all about bounty." Yukimura pointed out. "Because you were on your way here before you even knew it was part of our mission to kill this king."

"Why don't we just fly over the king's castle and shoot space cannon balls at it until we suddenly change Universes because he obviously will eventually die?" Ryou asked randomly.

"Because do I look like someone who would have space cannon balls?" demanded Sengoku. "I'm a space COWBOY! Not a space PIRATE! There's a difference, you know!"

"Besides, this way is more effective." Said Kamio. "Cause if we die, then everyone back at the ship could always fly over the kings castle and shoot space cannon balls at it."

"Okay ONE," said Sengoku. "We're not going to fail OR die. TWO! I don't have space cannon balls!"

"WHATEVER!" said everyone.

"Hey Mizuki," said Oishi. "How about you look in The Eye and tell us whether or not we're going to succeed so we know if we have to even bother."

"The Eye?" Sengoku inquired.

"It allows him to see Past, Present and Future." Oishi said.

"Oh yeah, that'll be helpful." Said Sengoku.

"That silly thing?" laughed Mizuki. "I left it back at the ship."

The group was silenced as they stopped walking.

"WHY?" they demanded.

"Because where was I supposed to put it with this fabulous outfit?" demanded Mizuki, gesturing in the general vicinity of his horrible body suit, which caused everyone to accidentally look at it. They writhed in pain and covered their eyes, and whence they recovered, they hit him with something.

"Let's go back and get it." Kamio said as he turned around to get The Eye but suddenly a laser beam came out of nowhere and shot him exactly where the charred circle was already in his back. He cried out and was frozen in place for a moment, but then was vaporized and disintegrated on the spot. Everyone let out loud animated gasps as they looked at Kamio's little pile of ashes where he once stood.

"That's what he gets for wearing the red shirt!" Sengoku said angrily.

But before they could argue any further, a bunch of aliens popped out from behind a few rocks and pointed their laser guns at the group, yelling at them to throw down their weapons.

"Better do what they say," Sengoku advised as he dropped his gun and put his hands up.

"Why?" said Ryou. "We could take them!"

"If you want to end up a pile of ashes like Kamio then go ahead!" said Sengoku angrily. "They've got a rare armor on that blocks these guns!"

"Oh." Said Ryou as he dropped his laser gun. The others dropped theirs as well as they aliens came over and captured them.

"You know, it would be really nice to have Ootori's super powers right about now…" said Atobe.


	79. Yuuta's POV

Channel 79- Yuuta's POV

Mizuki had explained a few things to me a little while back when I first came in contact with everyone else when we were in that Universe before, but he hardly prepared me for what was going to happen. There have been several murders in the group that have been entirely unnecessary, and they certainly appear to be occurring more often.

No one really took a lot of time to explain to me exactly what was going on, so I wouldn't be surprised if I was completely in the dark. I don't know how much longer we're going to be hopping around to different Universes, and when we're going to leave the Universe we're in. I have no say in anything that happens and I don't think anyone really cares to ask my opinion. Not that they'd be able to understand my response anyway.

Now I'm in a space ship, apparently. As far as I can tell, we're on a planet and a few people have left for some reason. I don't know if it has anything to do with when we're leaving this planet, or this Universe for that matter, or who exactly went.

All I know is that Mizuki is gone somewhere and Ootori from Hyoutei is dead so they can't translate for me. So, more than ever, I literally have no clue what's happening.

What's worse, I don't really know anyone either, except for Shuusuke, but I wouldn't have changed schools to St. Rudolph if I wanted to voluntarily spend time with my older brother.

I had watched the small group leave with everyone else, and then it seems they all decided to depart at the same time and leave me in the dust. I wandered around the space ship for a bit until I came across The Eye.

And that's where I am right now. I'm sitting in a room on the floor, holding The Eye. Mizuki told me never to touch it, but he had to have left it behind for some reason, so I wondered if maybe it was all right if I touched it just this once. After all, if I didn't take care of it then maybe someone would accidentally step on it or something.

Something the elves had told me was that The Eye originally belonged to us… them. I had known how to use The Eye, though I had never actually held the scepter before in my life, so I stood up and decided to check up on how the other group was doing. Since I knew for a fact that Mizuki was in the group, I checked his present.

I was upset with what I saw. Mizuki, along with several other people, were all being held at gunpoint by a group of angry and ugly aliens, being led somewhere. I immediately went to the door and flung it open, only to be faced with two people that I sort of knew, but only through tennis and this whole Universe thing. I was pretty sure their names were Oshitari and Gakuto, and they played for Hyoutei.

I glanced back into The Eye and saw that their captain happened to be one of the people in the prison as well.

I told them to look into The Eye, and only after did I realize that they didn't understand what I was saying because FOR SOME REASON, I had to be cursed with speaking a different language than everyone else.

So, instead, I pointed at The Eye quite clearly in such a fashion that would suggest I wanted them to look into it. Though they appeared skeptical at first, they both leaned over and looked in The Eye. I expected them to go rigid and immediately join me in my quest to right the wrongs, but they only looked back at me with their same skeptical expressions.

I waited for them to react.

They looked at each other and shrugged. Then Gakuto said something to me in a loud and abrasive tone. Oshitari said something to him that implied to me that he was telling him not to speak to me that way. Anyway, that's what I hoped.

Finally, Oshitari pointed at the room I was in and asked me a question. I wanted to hit him in the head and remind him that there was a language barrier, but I figured that wasn't going to go over very well. After all, I knew that Oshitari had a gun and Gakuto had several ninja weapons and if I wasn't careful, I was going to be killed or, at the very least, slapped across the face.

So I sidestepped around them and decided to just ignore them all together. They might not care about their team captain or everyone else, but I was going to find someone who DID care. Personally, I don't particularly like Mizuki, but that's no reason to wish suffering or death on him.

I made my way down the hall and the space on the floor where Ootori and his friend used to be dead was suddenly empty. I was glad someone had finally taken it upon himself to clean up the mess that had been made by my brother. The mere thought of his sudden act of violence upset me, especially when Mizuki explained to me WHY he did it. Of course, Ootori DID tell me not to believe most of what Mizuki said… but when it's concerning Shuusuke, I get the feeling that the stranger and more sadistic the explanation, the more accurate it's got to be.

I turned the corner and looked in The Eye again to see that nothing had changed quite yet. When I looked up, I was quite surprised to see what remained of Fudomine. Except Tachibana was unconscious or maybe dead, and Shinji was standing by him either caring for him or attempting to dispose of the body.

He noticed me almost right away and stared at me as if I didn't belong. In a way, I suppose I didn't, but he didn't have any right to stare at me like that. I didn't know whether Tachibana was dead or not, and as time goes on it's getting harder and harder to distinguish between the two, but I needed help. Even though it was against my better judgment since I didn't really know him, I approached him and showed him The Eye.

He leaned over and gazed into it, then stood up straight again.

He wasn't saying anything.

So I once again gestured towards The Eye.

He leaned over again. He must not have understood what he was looking at, even though it clearly displayed people we knew in serious danger. All he had to do was put two and two together.

Finally, he just turned his back to me. I waited, wondering what he was going to do next, but I quickly realized that he wasn't going to do anything. His adversity to action offended me, so I stomped off to find someone who would help.

I entered the next room and found almost everyone on Seigaku. It wasn't hard to tell that they had all been talking about something and had immediately stopped when I had come in. I stood in the doorway looking like an idiot as I scanned their faces, my eyes finally settling on Shuusuke.

He jumped to his feet and came right to me.

"Yuuta!" he exclaimed as he started speaking to me, but I could only understand a few words he had taught me. "—Brother—you—what—"

He gave a heavy sigh when I didn't say anything in response. I could tell he was disappointed.

"Yuuta," he said again. "Is—very—just—you—?"

He had asked me a question. I didn't know what he wanted from me.

"…I…like apples?" I tried. The last time I had said that, I had received an applause, so it couldn't hurt.

Shuusuke only continued to look at me quizzically and then laughed, putting his arm around me. I rolled my eyes and tried not to look TOO uncomfortable, figuring now was the opportune moment to show him what I had seen in The Eye.

I held it out before me and showed it to him.

"Oh!" he said, looking delighted. "It—Mizuki—how—brother—St. Rudolph—"

I knew he wasn't talking about The Eye or what he had seen in The Eye.

Tezuka said something, "Don't—down."

"Inui—remote—what—just—you—Mizuki—?" Taka asked.

I had no idea what they were talking about, but Taka had given me an idea. I looked around the room for Inui but I didn't see him. He tended to have a pretty good grip on what was going on, so I knew if I found him then I'd be in the clear. I darted out of the room to find him, only to look behind me and see that Shuusuke was following me.

"Yuuta—" he began as he went off and spoke for a very long time, obviously not seeing that my expression implied that I was not comprehending what he was saying.

"Wait," I said. "Inui."

"Inui—where—?"

"Where…Inui."

I felt like such a tool.

"Oh!" said Shuusuke with a laugh. He had no reason to laugh at my misfortune other than he's psychotic and does that kind of thing. He took my arm and led me down the halls and around the corner. He knocked on the door and I waited, hoping that he had actually taken me to see Inui.

I heard a voice call from inside, and Shuusuke opened the door. Inui was sitting at a desk with a white belt lied out on the table. I immediately ran over to him and showed him The Eye, but he only seemed half interested and wouldn't even look at it.

Shuusuke and Inui then had a conversation with each other that didn't involve me even though I was desperately trying to tell them something very important and it should have been obvious to them.

"Here," I said, pointing to The Eye, and they both looked at me. "Here."

I kept repeating it as I pointed to The Eye.

"Mizuki, Oishi, Atobe—" I said hesitantly, checking The Eye again to see who else was there. "Sengoku, Kabaji…Mizuki?" I slapped my forehead. I didn't know the word for danger.

Inui looked me up and down and then looked at my brother and said something in passing to him. No one was paying attention to me even though I rightfully deserved the attention. I feel as though I've been very patient over these last few weeks and now I finally have something I really need everyone to listen to me about and they're just ignoring me.

Inui turned around and picked something up of the table he was sitting at. It was a small box that he put close to his mouth and then said something. I stared at him.

Then he practically thrust the box into my face and said something else.

I backed away from the box but he stood up and followed me, keeping the box within only a few inches of my face.

Shuusuke gestured for me to do something. Or say something perhaps.

"I like apples," I said.

Inui shook his head and did not move the box.

Shuusuke chuckled but did not give me any further instruction.

Inui once again put the box to his mouth and spoke. Then he grabbed my hand and put the box in it. He waited.

I raised the box to my mouth.

"Hello?" I said.

He nodded.

"Testing…" I said again.

I was astounded. I didn't recognize the words that were coming out of my mouth, but somehow they made sense.

"What is this?" I asked.

Inui started speaking, but I didn't know what he was saying. I stared at him, wondering what had happened, and quickly handed him the box since it seemed to have the magic in it.

"Oh yes," said Inui, holding the box up to his mouth. "I found this in Shishido's utility belt here. It seems to be a translator."

Shuusuke gasped with delight and dove for the box, wrenching it away from Inui.

"Yuuta!" he said, speaking into it. "I'm so glad I finally have the chance to speak to you! I have so many questions to ask and I want you to know that I am so proud of you for—"

Inui took the box back, making Shuusuke glare angrily at him, but Inui seemed less concerned about that.

"Now," he spoke into the box. "My speculation is that you are seeing something in The Eye. I'll have you know that we can't see anything but clouds."

I felt stupid as he handed me the box. I had successfully made a fool of myself to several people.

I held the box up to my mouth. "All right, this is what I saw…"


	80. Translator

Channel 80- Translator

"I don't see why _I _had to go!" Kirihara whined to Taka as the two of them rode on their horses next to each other and Yuuta flew overhead on his Pegasus with homosexual tendencies.

"Well—" Taka began.

"That was rhetorical." Kirihara interrupted. "I DO see why I have to go. It's because I have a horse. But it's just not fair because I thought I was in the clear of having to deal with action for this Universe."

"It's not that bad," Taka shrugged.

Yuuta suddenly came flying down and landed in front of them with the translator box up to his mouth. "I see them up ahead!" he announced.

"How many enemies are around?" Taka asked.

Yuuta practically threw the box at Taka and gestured for him to repeat himself.

"Oh…sorry…" Taka said as he held the box up to his mouth. "How many enemies are there?"

Yuuta took the box back. "About ten," he answered. "And they have laser guns."

"We need to catch them by surprise." Kirihara said.

Yuuta looked at Kirihara and then gave him the box.

Kirihara looked annoyed, but took the box anyway. "We need to catch them by surprise." He repeated.

"How are we going to do that?" Taka wondered out loud.

Yuuta took the box from Kirihara and held it up to Taka.

"This is getting annoying." Kirihara commented.

Yuuta quickly held the box up to Kirihara.

"Oh come on!" Kirihara said, getting frustrated WAY too easily.

Yuuta held the box up to his own mouth. "What?" he asked.

Taka tapped Yuuta on the shoulder and gestured for him to give him the box. Yuuta handed it to him and he spoke into it with, "Never mind. We're just brainstorming ideas on how we'll be able to catch them by surprise. Have you got any?"

"I've got it!" said Kirihara. "We could—"

Taka handed Kirihara the translator.

Kirihara glared at Taka but took it. "We could light up my dynamite and Yuuta can take it up on his Pegasus and drop it down on everyone!" he said.

Taka and Yuuta simultaneously slapped their foreheads.

"No?" Kirihara said.

"Well, that would kill our teammates as well." Taka pointed out.

Yuuta took the translator back. "I'm assuming you voiced the obvious problem with that statement?" he inquired of Taka. Taka nodded and Yuuta looked back at Kirihara. "We have to think up a REAL plan."

"I liked it better when you couldn't understand us." Kirihara said, crossing his arms. Yuuta quickly held up the translator to Kirihara, but Kirihara turned his head and refused to speak into it.

Taka took the box instead. "Don't mind him." Taka assured Yuuta. "He's just being a jerk."

Yuuta took the translator back. "I can see that." He said.

"Can we just do things the way we usually do them?" Kirihara demanded.

"You mean just plow through without a plan?" Taka asked.

"Yeah!" said Kirihara. "Here, how about this?" He swiped the box from Taka. "We light the dynamite and throw it off in the distance and when it blows, they'll all be distracted. That's when we'll come swooping in, you with your sword, you with your arrows and me with the various weapons I have…"

"It's bound to work…" Taka said, looking dramatic.

Yuuta took the box back. "It's absolutely ludicrous but…it could work." He agreed.

"See?" said Kirihara.

"Okay, everyone get on," said Yuuta. "An aerial strike would be best."

Taka and Kirihara left their horses and got on Yuuta's Pegasus. They flew high up above the group of aliens guarding the team that had left the ship earlier.

"Does anyone have a match?" Kirihara asked, holding up the dynamite.

"You can't light that while we're all sitting here!" said Taka.

"How are we supposed to do it?" said Kirihara.

"How are we doing this?" Yuuta asked.

Kirihara once again glared at Yuuta.

"Cause I think I have an idea." Yuuta took the dynamite from Kirihara and handed him the translator. Then Yuuta threw the dynamite as far as he could while Kirihara just sat there looking betrayed. Before Kirihara could even voice his concerns, Yuuta whipped out his bow and one of his arrows, then said something in elfish that caused the tip of his arrow to burst into flames. He shot the arrow at the dynamite that was falling to the ground and waited.

"Show off." Kirihara said into the box.

Yuuta frowned at him, but they didn't have time to argue any further because the arrow had pierced the dynamite, causing it to explode in an explosion of fiery… explosiveness.

"Now's our chance!" Taka said, pointing down at the aliens who had all dove to the ground in horror and surprise.

When they reached the ground, Kirihara and Taka both dismounted. Taka whipped out his sword and exclaimed, "BURNING!" as he proceeded to make waste of the aliens. Yuuta started firing arrows at all of the aliens who tried to move toward him or attack his teammates. Kirihara had decided that it was his job to lasso one of the aliens and bother him until Taka came flailing by with his sword and decapitated him. The alien was decapitated, not Kirihara.

The ten aliens were sufficiently smote and Taka continued to run around like he was being paid for it so Oishi grabbed the sword and yoinked it from his hand. Taka immediately stopped and looked around, then chuckled warmly as he walked back over to the group.

"That was a cleverly executed rescue." Said Sengoku as he fished through the aliens' corpses in search of weapons. "But I'll have you know that we had the situation under control."

"Is that a fact?" said Kirihara. "You looked like you were captured."

"I wanted to be taken before the king so we could kill him." Said Sengoku. "But now I guess we'll have to improvise."

"Why didn't you tell me that?" demanded Ryou. "I was scared out of my mind!"

"Mizuki, what are you wearing?" Yuuta asked, speaking into the translator.

Mizuki looked surprised at Yuuta's sudden ability to speak the correct language, and Yuuta quickly explained the situation and handed him the translator so MIZUKI could now explain HIS situation.

"It's stylish, comfortable and fashionable," Mizuki said, modeling his horrible bodysuit with the flower. "I'm considering making it the new uniform for St. Rudolph. What do you think, Yuuta?"

It didn't take a translator to know that Yuuta was against the idea.

"Please don't." said Atobe. "I'm not even on St. Rudolph. But I don't want to be playing against you guys and have to look at an entire team of… THAT."

"Just think about it." Said Mizuki. "Yuuta…IN THIS."

Everyone present immediately started to argue, but then they stopped and pondered, rubbing their chin's pensively.

Yuuta gasped when he saw everyone do this, and swiped the translator from Mizuki.

"Everyone stop picturing me in that!" he commanded.

"Yuuta, you really could make it work." Yukimura said.

"Wait, say that again!" Yuuta went to give him the translator, but then he pulled it back. "On second thought, I don't want to hear it!"

"Hey…didn't Kamio from Fudomine come on this little adventure too?" Taka asked of the original group.

All those in the original group bowed their heads.

"Yes," they said. "But his life was taken."

"Oh." Said Taka as he lowered his head as well.

"Why are we all lowering our heads?" Yuuta said, offering the translator to anyone who could take it. "You're all not still picturing me in that outfit, are you?"

"It's not always about YOU, Yuuta," said Sengoku, taking the translator from him. "All right, listen up everyone. I'm only going to say this once."

"Really?" said Mizuki. "Are you truly only going to say whatever you're going to say once?"

"Well, I only WANT to say it once." Said Sengoku, looking annoyed. "So everyone pay attention!"

"Hey look, here comes your horses!" exclaimed Oishi, pointing off in the distance.

"I love my horse." Said Taka, looking so happy as his horse galloped right up to him.

"I knew she'd find her way back." Kirihara agreed.

And the two of them proceeded to joyfully welcome their horses back to the group as Sengoku stood there looking angry.

"ARE YOU TWO DONE?" he demanded.

They jumped in surprise.

"Someone needs to take a chill pill." Said Kirihara.

"Excuse me for being the only one concerned about killing this evil alien emperor." Said Sengoku.

Yuuta reached for the translator but Sengoku held him off.

"No, no." he said. "You've lost your speaking privileges."

Yuuta looked beyond offended, and instinctually reached for his bow and an arrow, pointing it Sengoku. He was going to do whatever he could to get his translator back. And, since Sengoku was feeling particularly bitchy at this moment, he pulled out his laser gun and pointed it at Yuuta.

The two of them remained like that for a few seconds as everyone else waited.

"All right, whatever." Said Sengoku as he lowered his gun and handed Yuuta the box.

Yuuta looked overly excited as he put away his arrow and caressed the translator. Then he held it up to his mouth.

"In response to your earlier comment," he said. "I am also concerned about killing the evil alien emperor."

Then he handed the translator back to Sengoku.

Sengoku took it. "That's all you wanted to say?" he said into the box.

Yuuta nodded.

"And you… were going to put an arrow in my forehead… because you had to say that." Sengoku pointed out.

Yuuta considered Sengoku's statement and then shrugged flamboyantly.

"Let's just get on with it," Atobe ordered.

"All right." Said Sengoku, giving Yuuta the hand. "Everyone listen up. I hope I'm only going to have to say this once."


	81. OMAKE 2

Channel 81- OMAKE 2

Tachibana suddenly awoke while clutching his heart. He had felt a pain in the depths of his soul as if he had just felt a horrible loss and knew that something had happened to one of his beloved Fudomine second years.

Sure enough, whence he sat up, he saw Shinji across the room tied to a chair.

"Tachibana, you're awake!" Shinji exclaimed happily.

Tachibana immediately ran to him. "Shinji, what happened?" he said as he started to untie him.

But then he abruptly stopped.

"Wait," he said. "Why was I sleeping?"

"Well you weren't really sleeping…" Shinji said. "Kamio and I attacked and chloroformed you so you wouldn't be able to go on the mission to kill the alien king of this planet, and we knew the only way to do that was for you to be unable to go yourself."

"Oh no!" said Tachibana, slapping his cheeks in a very uncharacteristic fashion.

"Are you mad at me, Tachibana?" asked Shinji, giving Tachibana the ultimate puppy dog eyes.

"No, of course not, Shinji!" said Tachibana. "I know you had my best interests at heart even if your methods of carrying out your plans were slightly over the top! But I'm most concerned about Kamio… I have this terrible feeling that something awful has happened to him!"

With that, Tachibana sprinted out of the room. Shinji sat idly by for a few seconds before Tachibana returned.

"Wait, why are you tied to a chair again?" he asked.

"Oh." Said Shinji, looking down at his predicament. "Ootori tied me to this chair."

"Ootori from Hyoutei?" Tachibana looked confused. "Ootori's dead."

"Oh well…you know how when Renji sucks someone's blood they become his zombie slave?" Shinji said. "Apparently Renji sucked Ootori and Shishido's blood while they were dead in the hallway."

"I see." Said Tachibana, looking perplexed. "And…it was Renji's bidding to have you tied to a chair?"

"No I don't think so." Said Shinji. "I doubt Renji really knows he has them as zombie slaves right now."

"Why?" Tachibana said.

"Because Shishido was there and his target was you, so Ootori tied me to a chair and broke my wand in half." Shinji said, gesturing his head toward the broken wand on the floor and sniffling.

"ME?" gasped Tachibana. "Why me? What happened?"

"There's a mirror over there," Shinji said.

Tachibana turned around and looked in the mirror to discover that someone had written 'TACHIBANA IS LAME' on his face in black marker.

"WHO WOULD DO THIS?" Tachibana practically shrieked as he almost fell over. He wasn't used to people not liking him.

"Tachibana, I already told you it was Shishido!" said Shinji.

Tachibana clenched his fist dramatically. "Humiliate me…FINE." he muttered. "But tie my teammate to a chair…and you've crossed the line. I have to stop these madmen before they cause anyone else pain!"

Tachibana tore out of the room as fast as he could, leaving Shinji in the dust.

Meanwhile, Sanada was wandering down the hallways, opening doors. He finally entered one of the rooms and made his way to the closet and knocked. Waiting patiently, the door opened just a tiny bit with Renji peeking out.

"Yes?" he asked.

"I have to talk to you, Renji." Said Sanada, crossing his arms and tapping his foot. "Would you please come out here?"

Renji sighed and exited the closet, opening an umbrella and standing underneath it on the way out.

"What is it?" Renji asked.

"Did you suck the blood of Shishido and Ootori while they were dead in the hallway?" Sanada said in a tone that suggested he was speaking to a young child.

Renji didn't answer at first. "Did Inui tell you?" he asked.

"No," said Sanada.

"Oh." Renji said. "Well…I did. I figured it wouldn't matter to anyone since they were already dead and I hadn't eaten in a while."

"Well it DOES matter." Sanada said. "You turned both of them into zombies and now they're wandering around the ship harassing people!"

Renji looked perplexed.

"No way," he said.

Just then, Tachibana appeared in the doorway. "There you are!" he said, pointing at Renji. "You turned Shishido into a zombie slave and he wrote THIS on my face and Ootori tied Shinji to a chair!"

Then Tachibana gasped.

"I left Shinji tied to that chair!" he said.

He WOULD have fainted if he wasn't so motivated to rescue Shinji and he quickly departed.

"Wait, what did it say on his face?" Renji asked, looking amused.

"It said 'Tachibana Is Lame'." Sanada said, ALSO looking amused. The two of them chuckled about it at first but then Sanada got serious. "So yeah. You have to stop them before they wreak anymore havoc."

"Okay, okay…" said Renji, looking less than thrilled as he trekked out of the room, hunched under the umbrella.

Because this is RENJI we're talking about, of course he subconsciously made his way to the room Inui was in. He opened up the door to be faced with a surprising sight.

Choutarou had Inui in a headlock as Shishido went around the room picking up random things on the floor and putting them in his utility belt.

"Oh, hello Renji," said Inui as if the entire situation was totally normal.

Renji sighed and turned the lights off and put down his umbrella.

"Hey, hey," he said, clapping his hands as he went over to Choutarou. "You. Let go of him. There will be none of that."

Choutarou immediately let go of Inui.

"Thank you, Renji." Said Inui, brushing himself off and adjusting his patch. "I see there were consequences to sucking the blood of others, even if they are already dead."

"I figured you would say that." Renji said. Then he gestured towards Shishido. "What is this all about?"

"I took his utility belt because I was curious about it, and now I think he's just putting everything back in it." Inui shrugged.

"Well, that's justifiable." Renji established. "Apparently these two have been wreaking havoc all about the ship on various people and getting the best of them."

"Have they?" Inui said, now adjusting his glasses.

"The only one I've seen so far is Tachibana, and apparently Tachibana's teammate Shinji." Renji said. "But I'm going to assume there are more people suffering."

"Since I have been liberated of Shishido's utility belt, shall we explore together?" Inui suggested.

"Certainly." Renji said. Then he looked at Choutarou and Shishido. "You two stay here and behave or I will become cross."

They both nodded as Renji picked up his umbrella and he and Inui left the room.

"Where should we begin?" Inui asked.

"Well, thus far all the deeds the Silver Pair have committed have been somewhat personal on a certain level." Renji observed. "Shishido has a grudge against Tachibana for subsequently causing his removal from the regulars on Hyoutei, so he wrote 'Tachibana Is Lame' on his forehead."

"I see," said Inui since he was savvy to this information as well since he's Inui and Inui knows everything.

"And they also went to retrieve Shishido's utility belt from you." Renji said. "Those are both personal."

"So let us consider the people who remain and then establish potential grudges that either Shishido or Ootori posses towards them." Inui said.

"We know what happened to Tachibana and Shinji, and as far as I could tell, nothing happened to Sanada or me so that eliminates both Fudomine and Rikkai Dai because everyone else is gone." Renji said.

"There is Atsushi from St. Rudolph," Inui started.

They looked at each other.

"I don't think either of them have anything against him." Renji said.

The two of them subconsciously stepped over Ryoma lying in the hallway with swirly eyes. Since those two obviously have SYNCHRO to some degree, they stopped at the same time and looked back to see Ryoma in his state. Not only was he beaten up to some degree, but he also had 'Hyoutei will win' written on his face.

"They are exacting their revenge on Ryoma because it was his fault Hyoutei lost since it came down to him at the end." Inui said.

"This is true." Said Renji. "Keen observation, Sadaharu."

"Thank you."

They nodded to each other and continued walking without helping Ryoma.

"Do you think they would do anything cruel to their own teammates?" Inui inquired.

"Hm…it is doubtful." Renji said.

"What about Fuji?" Inui suddenly stopped walking.

"Fuji IS the one who killed them." Renji nodded.

"As of now, all of their acts of revenge appear to be harmless." Inui said. "Do you suppose that their revenge against Fuji would be anything more drastic than scrawling on his face or a hit on the head?"

They kept walking until they came across a trail of blood that lead to a closed door.

Inui and Renji looked at each other and turned around.

"On second thought, I'm not all THAT interested in the other acts they committed against various people…" Inui said.

"My thoughts exactly." Renji said.

Just then, they almost crashed into… Fuji!

"Oh there you are Inui." Said Fuji. "I just went into that room you've been in… and Shishido and Ootori are there, oddly enough."

He looked confused.

"Didn't…I kill them?" he said finally.

"Um…" Renji and Inui both said, quizzically looking back at the trail of blood that was behind them.

Fuji peeked around them.

"About that," Fuji said. "Kentarou's in that room. I almost didn't recognize him at first. I was wondering who beat him up so drastically that he would look like that."

"Well, that's certainly personal." Renji said.

"Fuji, did Shishido and Ootori attempt to attack you at all when you entered the room?" Inui said.

"No." said Fuji. "They just stood there like statues."

"Well, Sadaharu, this has been a very interesting adventure." Said Renji as he started backing up towards the trail of blood.

Inui grabbed his arm. "Don't even think about it, Renji." He said. "If you drink the blood of Kentarou, whether he is dead or not, he will become your zombie slave and he will proceed to bother MORE people."

Renji frowned. "How did you know I was going to do that?" he asked.

Inui gave him that look that was like, "I'M INUI." Instead, he said, "I know you better than anyone else, Renji."

"That is true, Sadaharu." Renji said. "Likewise. I have collected more data on you than even my own teammates whom I have played with for three years."

"That is another thing we do alike, Renji." Said Inui.

Fuji threw his arms up in the air. "For crying out loud, get a room, you two." He said as he walked away.

Inui and Renji looked offended, but not offended enough to do anything about it.


	82. Authority

Channel 82- Authority

I think now would be the opportune time to briefly describe the landscape and appearance of these aliens that must be destroyed.

The planet was essentially a desert with random large rock formations protruding from the ground every once and a while, perfect for hiding behind. Of course, with a planet that revolves around five suns, there is never any shadows so, needless to say, it got quite hot.

The aliens had adapted to the planet so they no longer required water in order to survive because once again, I find it needless to say (yet I am saying it anyway!) that this planet revolves around five suns so water is quite scarce. Let's say they were large and green with cumbersome scales on their back, resembling large overgrown lizards with big beady eyes. Why the big beady eyes? Simply because they are alien, and therefore it would be ideal for them to look "less human".

It is quite apparent to both the reader and the author that this planet as well as the appearance of the aliens are quite cliché. If the triteness of these two facts annoys or irritates the reader, then perhaps he or she is in the wrong place. After all, if he or she has made it this far in the adventure, he or she must have come to expect the cliché. Surely he or she has come to realize that clichés are essentially the backbone of this entire piece of fiction.

In addition, we would also like to remind the reader just who is in this half of the adventure. It must have been easy to forget so quickly, since the groups have slightly changed and there was a bit of an interruption since we were last with the group storming the castle. Yuuta is present, along with his Pegasus, and he came along with Taka and Kirihara who each have their horses as well. Sengoku and Kabaji, native to this Universe that is quite reminiscent of Star Wars, are leading the escapade. Alongside this inseparable duo who have no doubt become quite close over the past forty-six or so days, we are followed by Mizuki who has forgotten his scepter back at the ship and silly Yuuta! He got so excited about the translator that it slipped his mind to bring it along. There is also Yukimura, the airy model, who is essentially useless as he normally is. In his current female state, Oishi tags along, though he wishes I would cease in my mentioning of his temporary femininity. Atobe would have liked to have been mentioned first but clearly that didn't happen, so instead he is all the way down the list, and though it upsets him so, I care not since he is a fictional character. Last and probably least, Ryou is present as well simply because he would have been less tedious to have than that pesky Kentarou fellow!

Kamio _would _have been present but he unfortunately (or fortunately if you happen to not be a fan of Kamio's) met an untimely end a few chapters in back in which he was vaporized for foolishly wearing a cursed shirt with a charred circle on the back of it. Alas for Kamio, would might have mourned his death if not for the fact that he shall return whence they change Universes… nay, IF they change Universes! Though how sad would it be were they not to change Universes with only one person left to retrieve?

That being said, we shall move on and drop this pretentious style of writing.

Sengoku rolled behind one of the previously mentioned gigantic rock formations protruding from the ground. It was very ninja-esque, though sadly enough, no one from the Ninja Universe was present, and everyone did their best to follow him.

"Great, now I've got my fantastic future uniform of St. Rudolph all dirty." Sighed Mizuki as he stood up and brushed off said article of clothing.

"SH!" Sengoku ordered in an overly animated fashion. "The lair of the Zagathyrns is right up there behind those rocks!"

He pointed up at the huge rocks that looks like a mountain. A few people with particularly good vision could see some peaks of the castle, but other than that, they only looked back at Sengoku with this face that was like: "How dare you."

"It'll take days to climb that fortress." Yukimura said. "And how are we supposed to do it without getting detected?"

"And what about our horses?" said Taka.

"I think Forehand is getting tired and hot…" Kirihara said, stroking his horse lovingly.

"There's a secret passageway underground." Sengoku answered. "The Zagathyrns can't see in the dark at all so all we have to do is when we get down there is douse out all the lights as we go. That way, if there are any guards, we'll be able to take them out."

"Question." Oishi raised his hand.

"Yes?" offered Sengoku.

"We can't see in the dark either." Oishi pointed out.

"That's why I brought THESE!" said Sengoku as he whipped out a pair of goggles and put them on. "They allow me to see in the dark."

"They also make you look ridiculous." Said Atobe under his breath but obviously loud enough for Sengoku to hear.

"But there's still the problem that none of US will be able to see." Oishi said. "Sure, it's great that YOU can see and everything, but what about us?"

"I don't know!" said Sengoku, taking the goggles off so everyone could take him seriously. "I was the one who said that me and Kabaji would have been able to do this on our own but NO! You guys just HAD to send people along and be a burden on us!"

"Usu," said Kabaji, putting a hand on Sengoku's shoulder.

Sengoku took a step back. "You're right Kabaji," he sighed. "I'm sorry everyone. I think the heat is just getting to me."

The others raised an eyebrow in response.

"How about this?" said Kirihara, taking his lasso off from his belt. "We could all hold onto this like a lifeline and Sengoku can lead us. It'll be like kindergarten."

"Great idea, Kirihara," said Yukimura, looking proud as if HE had done anything.

"Really?" Kirihara beamed as if Yukimura had done anything.

"So you ARE good for something!" said Sengoku, being mean for no reason as he swiped the lasso from Kirihara and untied it. "Everyone hold onto the rope and under no circumstances let go of it."

"What if we have to?" Ryou asked.

"I said under no circumstances." Sengoku glared.

"No but really, what if we have to?" Ryou repeated.

"Then say something." Sengoku rolled his eyes.

"Say what?" Ryou said.

"Say… I'm letting go of the rope for a second." Sengoku tried, sounding exasperated.

"Okay." Said Ryou. "I'm just making sure because there might be a time when we have to let go of the rope!"

"When would we have to do that?" demanded Sengoku, now getting angry.

"I don't know!" said Ryou. "Like if we have to tie our shoe or if we trip!"

"He's got a point." Commented Taka.

"Whatever!" said Sengoku. "Why do you guys have to always question every single thing I do? It really gets annoying!"

"Deal with it." Said Mizuki. "We're all going to have to deal with post traumatic stress disorder anyway so there's no reason for you to get all irritated over something small."

"WHATEVER!" Sengoku grunted frustratedly.

"Hey." Said Mizuki. "What did I JUST say?"

"THAT'S ENOUGH." Sengoku practically screamed.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

Sengoku once again took some hoot breaths. "You're right, Kabaji." Said Sengoku. "There's no use getting so angry over small things."

"Okay, I just have to ask," said Atobe. "What is going on with you and Kabaji?"

"What?" said Sengoku.

"You're all…" Atobe started. "What, do you think he BELONGS to you or something?"

"Um…what?" Sengoku was looking rather perplexed.

"What's the plan, anyway?" Yuuta asked randomly, speaking into his translator.

Everyone turned and stared at him.

"None of you cared enough to speak into the translator so naturally I don't know what's going on." Said Yuuta as if he had to justify himself.

"All right everyone listen up!" Sengoku swiped the translator from Yuuta. "I am the leader of this mission so you all have to do what I say without questioning me, got it? You are all going to hold onto that lasso and we are going to go through that underground tunnel, dousing the lights, AND YOU WILL ALL BE FOLLOWING ME. That is what is going to happen until we're in the middle of the castle, then we're going to ascend and destroy the king. GOT IT?"

"I have a question." Taka said.

"I have nothing against you, so you may speak." Sengoku said.

"Well," Taka said, crossing his arms. "Once we kill the king, we're going to be in the middle of the castle, right?" Sengoku nodded. "Well, how do we get out from that point without being murdered by all of the aliens who will be infuriated with us for murdering their king?"

Sengoku gave a heavy sigh.

"Do you really think I hadn't thought of that ahead of time?" he said.

"Um…" said everyone.

"That's where KABAJI comes in!" Sengoku said. "He explained this earlier, but apparently you weren't listening."

"I guess not…" Taka said, looking confused.

"Okay, we sacrificed the power in our ship into this device that Kabaji has." Sengoku said. "Essentially, it works as a teleporter and… well, I'm not exactly sure how it works… why don't you explain, Kabaji?"

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"Yeah so, that being said," Sengoku said. "We'll be teleported back to the ship and we'll have to wait a couple of hours for the power to come back online, but once it does, we'll be able to take off. No problem."

"I sense a problem." Said Ryou. "What about those couple of hours? The aliens will probably pop in at around that time."

"It's irrelevant anyway," said Atobe. "Once we're teleported back to the ship, we'll all be together so we can jump Universes."

"Oh right." Ryou nodded.

"Wait!" said Sengoku. "I want to at least collect my bounty for killing this guy!"

"Sorry, we have a tendency of doing really great things and succeeding…" Oishi started. "And then abruptly switching Universes before we get compensated for it."

"You wouldn't be able to keep your earnings anyway." Yukimura said. "Everything resets when we go to the next Universe so you'll just be wherever you started when you first appeared."

"But then someone ELSE will get the credit for my hard work!" pouted Sengoku.

"WE DON'T CARE!" everyone yelled. "WE ONLY HAVE ONE MORE PERSON TO GET AND YOU'RE BEING ANNOYING!"

"OKAY OKAY!" said Sengoku angrily as he put his goggles on. "Everyone grab onto the lifeline and let's head into the tunnel!"

Everyone put their hands in the middle and then leapt up into the air like a big group of Power Rangers.


	83. Search Party

Channel 83- Search Party

"So, in conclusion!" Tachibana said as he stood before everyone who remained on the spacecraft. "When I ventured outside to get a look around and discovered a pile of ashes, I knew something was wrong!"

No one could really take him seriously because, in his haste to check to see if his little Fudomine second years were all right, he had forgotten to clean 'Tachibana is Lame' off his forehead.

"Sure enough," Tachibana went on even though he had already said 'in conclusion'. "Those ashes were all that remained of Kamio!"

Shinji dabbed his eyes with a tissue as everyone gasped.

"He gave his life…to protect me…" Tachibana clenched his fist dramatically.

"It's all right, though, since he'll just reappear in the next Universe." Oshitari pointed out.

"And we knew something was wrong, so that's why we sent Yuuta, Taka and Kirihara." Inui added.

"But they were supposed to come back and tell us everything went all right." Tachibana reminded him.

"Maybe they just forgot." Kaidou said.

"HELLO?" Momo hit Kaidou upside the head. "We're on a foreign planet! We have no idea what happened to them! They could be dead! Tachibana is right!"

Kaidou was too busy looking more shocked than was humanly possible that Momo had smacked him.

"So I say we have to stage a rescue mission…" Tachibana began.

"Lest we forget; Taka, Yuuta and Kirihara are already doing that." Renji said.

"They've had more than enough time to find them and make it back here." Tachibana reminded them. "I don't want to find anymore piles of ashes scattered around! We have to do something!"

"It could be a rash decision…" Inui said.

"Why?" said Tachibana.

"Because in the event that everything went smoothly and returning to us simply slipped their minds, when the first group finally DOES return with their mission complete, there will be people missing from the ship and we will have to consequentially send more people to retrieve the other people and thus the horrible cycle will continue until we run out of provisions."

"Nice run on sentence." Said Gakuto.

Inui gave Gakuto a questioning look.

"But on the other hand," Tachibana said. "In the event that everything DIDN'T go smoothly, we'll just sit here and end up running out of provisions ANYWAY. And then we won't jump Universes then either."

"What a dilemma!" Eiji exclaimed.

"Well, if SOMEONE hadn't killed Ootori then I'm sure he'd have a few different powers that could have solved this situation in a painless manner."

The comment came from among the sea of heads. No one knew who said it, except of course the person who said it. Fuji eyed the room, making eye contact with whoever was feeling dangerous at the time, but he could not evaluate who had made the comment.

Perhaps, deep down, Fuji knew that it was a mistake to kill Shishido and Choutarou.

Then again, Fuji could have just been looking to kill someone else because that's just the way Fuji is.

"Well, Tachibana," said Tezuka, standing up. "Let's assume, for a moment, that we are concerned for the rest of the people. What do you propose we would do?"

"I already said that we should send out a rescue party!" Tachibana announced. "A small group. Probably three or four people."

"And who would be in said group?" Oshitari asked.

Everyone looked at him sitting with his three Hyoutei pals. Him with his detectiveness, Gakuto and Jirou with their ninjaness and Hiyoshi with his wizardness.

"Maybe we could send Hyoutei?" Sanada suggested.

"What?" yelled Gakuto. "We are not your bitches!"

Oshitari slapped his forehead in response to Gakuto's mindless comment that did them no good.

"It's settled then!" said Tachibana. "Hyoutei will go and form search party number two."

"I can see why you're sending those three." Hiyoshi gestured to his whiny compadres. "But why me? I don't have any special abilities when it comes to finding people."

"Well you're a wizard and you can fly and you have magic spells." Atsushi said.

"Shinji's a wizard and he can fly and he has magic spells." Hiyoshi reminded everyone.

"Come on, Hiyoshi," sighed Oshitari as he grabbed Hiyoshi's collar and dragged him out of the room, following after the two ninjas.

The Hyoutastic group descended to the exit area of the craft and stepped out into the desert sun. Then they proceeded to lament because they realized their clothing was ever so unsuited for what they were going to do. All of them were in dark colors that absorbed the sunlight and IN SEVERAL LAYERS.

So after complaining to each other for about few minutes, they turned around and saw that there was an open door leading to a room with huge trunks filled with clothing.

Since they figured they were entitled, they all decided to change their clothes to something more practical. HURRAY! (Yes, I literally got so excited right then that I had to write out my cheer.)

"HEY!" Gakuto exclaimed as he pulled out a skin type spandex body suit that was kind of like the horrible one Mizuki had except it was short sleeves and didn't have the horrible flower on it. "This is perfect! Then I won't have to worry about clothing getting in the way and in my face when I do my acrobatics!"

"Gakuto, I refuse to allow you to wear that." Said Oshitari as he grabbed it and threw it across the room.

Gakuto's lip quivered and he looked dejected.

"Please put on something that won't burn my eyes when I look at it." Hiyoshi added.

"That level of cruelty, Hiyoshi, was unnecessary." Oshitari said.

"Oh." Said Hiyoshi, bowing his head in shame.

"Gakuto, since Hiyoshi was so mean to you, I'm going to allow you to wear the spandex." Oshitari said as he retrieved the spandex and handed it back to Gakuto.

"YAY!" cheered Gakuto. "You're the best, Yuushi!"

"I know." Said Oshitari.

"Hey guys, what do you think?" said Jirou as he walked around the corner in a bear suit. It was one of those outrageous outfits that you put in 2 year olds for Halloween so there was no reason for there to be one in Jirou's size. And there was even less of a reason for why he was wearing it.

But still, he had found it and he had also put it on without anyone even noticing. At first, they were going to order him to take it off, but then the trio telepathically came to the decision that Jirou actually looked ultimately precious and adorable in it so therefore he should get to wear whatever he wants. After all, if he can work the bear suit, he deserves to have it.

Hiyoshi is that character that people can give random personalities to in fanfiction if they need a character to be a certain way. He is also the character that might have a story all about how everyone ignores him all the time and that makes him sad. He's also that character that gets replaced by like a thirty year old man with a beard in the live action movie and no one even bothers to mention it. So, because Hiyoshi is that type of character, he just took off his wizard cloak, sweater vest and Hufflepuff scarf and discarded it. He was all right the way he was.

Oshitari, on the other hand, decided on a much more personality defining ensemble. He put on a flashy fancy outfit that matched and went together splendidly, and even found a scarf that complimented his skin tone and figure. And then worked this hat that no one else in the entire world would be able to work. I mean seriously. His hat pretty much owned everything anyone has ever looked at. But the best part about it was the fact that if ANYONE ELSE wore the hat, it would look like crap. It was one of those hats that you see on the rack and are like: WTF THIS IS SO UGLY! And if you saw someone wearing it, you'd be like: I hope he didn't pay MONEY for that! But no. Oshitari wore it. And it worked. It actually looked good. It looked sexilicious.

After everyone stood in awe at Oshitari's success in working the hat that none of them had dared touch, they looked at each other and tried to stifle their laughter. Each of them had their own opinions on each other's outfits, but they all thought their OWN outfit looked good.

"As long as I have my wand and my broom, I don't really care what I'm wearing." Said Hiyoshi as he lounged on his broom while everyone else had to walk.

"Do you have to do that?" said Oshitari. "At least let us have a turn."

Hiyoshi landed and sighed, carrying his broom. "I guess it's not fair of only some of us get to ride," he established.

"Okay, so who exactly are we trying to find?" Gakuto said.

"Well, we have some footprints here leading towards and around this pile of ashes." Jirou said.

"Those are Tachibana's." Oshitari said.

"And then there are many other sets of footprints over here on the other side of this pile of ashes," Jirou continued.

"Those are everyone from the first group's." Oshitari said.

"And then there is this foreign set of footprints that are large and have three toes and suspicious claw marks." Gakuto went on. "Going that way."

He pointed off in the distance towards a giant rock formation way way way WAY far away.

"It's all yours, Oshitari." Said Jirou, crossing his arms.

Oshitari took off his clip on sunglasses (you know, the kind that goes OVER your glasses) and looked at formation in the distance, then down at the footprints.

"Did you two happen to catch the two sets of horse prints?" Oshitari asked, bending down and touching said prints.

Gakuto and Jirou leaned over his shoulder.

"Um…no…" they admitted.

"So that means that the first rescue group made it at least this far, and likely came to the conclusion that the others were being led that way." Oshitari began to walk. "Since it doesn't take a detective to follow a single group of footprints."

"What would we do without you?" said Hiyoshi.

"I JUST said it didn't take a detective to follow a single group of footprints." Oshitari said.

"Oh." Said Hiyoshi. "Sorry. I just wanted to say something."

The group continued until they came across a giant steaming heap of dead alien corpses.

"Now…" said Gakuto, rubbing his chin pensively. "Call me crazy, but this suggests that the first rescue group was quite successful."

"We can head back then, right?" Hiyoshi asked.

"Sure, they were successful in killing these aliens here…" Oshitari said. "But, we must wonder if they were successful in making it all the way to the king's lair and killing HIM."

Oshitari clipped his sunglasses back on his glasses and stared at the mountainous rock.

"So what now?" Hiyoshi asked.

"Hiyoshi, you go back and tell everyone that we're on the trail so they don't send ANOTHER search party." Oshitari said. "Jirou, Gakuto and I will continue. After you speak with them, try to catch up with us. If you don't find us, assume we died."

Hiyoshi stared at Oshitari.

"Um…" he said slowly.

"Do you need me to repeat the directions?" Oshitari asked.

"No… that's all right…" said Hiyoshi cautiously as he mounted his broom and flew away.

"Come on," said Oshitari. "My guess is that the king's lair is just up ahead."

"Yuushi, you are SO COOL." Said Gakuto. And he was looking like there was a party in his… er… eyes. Yeah. In his eyes.


	84. Disaster Strikes

Channel 84- Disaster Strikes

"All right, could you brief us on the best way to kill these aliens?" Ryou asked.

"Huh?" Sengoku turned around and looked at the group that was all huddled behind him, following him and holding onto the rope since he was the only one who could see.

"You know, just so we're not completely blindsided like we were last time." Ryou said.

"What are you talking about?" said Sengoku. "You guys weren't blindsided."

"Except for that whole… these aliens have special armor and the weapons that we got won't have any affect on them." Atobe pointed out.

"Oh yeah." Said Sengoku. "Well that was a special case."

"How was that a special case?" said Oishi.

"I didn't KNOW they were going to have the special armor!" Sengoku said defensively. "I already told you that this was my first time on this planet!"'

"Didn't you do any RESEARCH?" demanded Kirihara.

"Not really…" Sengoku said truthfully. "But I'm sure once we get there, we'll be able to beat the king no problem."

"And what makes you think something like that?" said Kirihara.

"Because I stole the soldiers' weapons that we killed earlier!" Sengoku said with a devious grin.

Mizuki happened to be standing closest to Sengoku, and his eyes had adjusted enough to the dark so he could at least see his faint outline. So, he seized the opportunity to smack Sengoku across the face.

"Hey!" Sengoku said angrily. "What was that for?"

"Why can't you ever tell us that you have made a plan ahead of time?" said Mizuki. "I speak for all of us."

"Here here!" cheered the others.

"This is the way I roll!" said Sengoku. "It's been me and Kabaji this whole time by ourselves! This is the first time I've ever had to EXPLAIN myself to anyone! Kabaji never questions me. Which is different from you guys who question every single thing I do…"

"Of course we're going to question you when you lead us into the deepest part of an alien lair." Yukimura said. "We're only concerned for our own safety."

"Okay, I think we all have to have a conversation," Sengoku said. "_I _am the captain and _you guys _are the Regulars. _I _am the leader and _you guys _are my followers. _I _am the Cobra Commander and _you guys_ are my ninja assassins. _I _am Glinda and _you guys_ are the Munchkins. _I _am Jesus and _you guys_ are my disciples. "

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"Good one, Kabaji!" said Sengoku. "That one too!"

Everyone could only really look at Sengoku in shock.

"Well that was bold." Said Atobe. "Putting yourself on the same level as _Jesus_."

"Well I might as well be!" said Sengoku. "Without me, you all are lost. Literally AND figuratively. SO GOD DAMN IT STOP QUESTIONING EVERY SINGLE THING I DO!"

Sengoku flailed and pretty much as a temper tantrum slash body spasm right then and there and it only ceased when someone hushed him as they heard something approaching.

They all pressed themselves up against the wall as the sound of the figures approaching got closer. And closer. _And closer_…

"Do we get to shoot them?" Kirihara whispered.

"SH!" said everyone, but their hushing him was actually louder than what he had actually said.

And this loud noise made all of the aliens freak out and realize something was amiss. Then they astutely noticed that someone had doused the lights so they searched frantically for a way to illuminate their path.

But our heroes were FAR too quick for them. They leapt up and took their opportunity. And by 'they' I mean Sengoku. Obviously only Sengoku because everyone else was blinded.

"Well we really thought this through!" said Oishi as he and everyone else cowered in the corner.

"Hey, Yuuta, you can make fire, right?" said Kirihara as he grabbed Yuuta's shoulders and shook him violently.

Yuuta was, of course, just like: "!" because he had given his translator to Sengoku so he would be able to hear all the plans. Now he would be doomed to not understand everyone much like he had been previous to that day when Inui discovered the translator that Shishido was CLEARLY hiding the entire time because he has a secret grudge against Yuuta. But probably not. He probably just didn't realize it was there or maybe he was just always distracted by cough something else cough that he never even thought to hand it over.

IRRELEVANTLY, it was impossible to convey to Yuuta that they wanted him to make light. And, as it turned out, Kirihara hadn't even grabbed Yuuta's shoulders, he had accidentally grabbed Ryou's shoulders so Ryou was like: GET OFF ME YOU OAF!

But Yuuta had heard his name so he was still like: "!"

They could see randomly because of the laser guns that were being shot from Sengoku's gun and the flashes they caught glimpses of didn't tell them very much about the outcome of the battle.

"Kabaji, isn't there _something _that can be done?" Atobe sighed.

"Usu," said Kabaji as he took out a small cylindrical device from his pocket and threw it on the ground. Everyone stared at the faint blinking light it except for Kabaji and Sengoku who closed their eyes, and in an instant, the entire room exploded with the brightest light any of them had ever seen.

Their pain was so instantaneous and collective that they fell in a heap on the ground and writhed. The aliens had a similar reaction, except they all retreated to summon their leader.

"Well," said Sengoku as he pulled an unlit torch from the wall and cast it aflame with a lighter that he happened to have. "That wasn't so hard!"

"Why are you putting on a light?" Taka asked whence he recovered from the flare.

"Well, now that they know we're here, there's no point in being secretive about it." Sengoku shrugged as he handed the torch back to Kabaji.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"All right everyone, give me my lasso back." Kirihara ordered as he started blindly wrapping his lasso up.

They waited around for a few minutes to allow their eyes to adjust and stop BLEEDING. But they weren't really bleeding. Anyone who said that they were was exaggerating.

"That was exciting!" Yukimura exclaimed. "And we haven't even gotten to the king's throne room yet!"

"We should be there very soon now." Sengoku waved his arms to signal everyone to follow him. They decided to follow him and not ask questions because of his little fit he had thrown prior to being attacked by the aliens.

Yuuta held out his hand for the translator.

Sengoku frowned.

"Is it SUPER important that you have to inconvenience me?" he asked.

"Just give him the damn translator." Said Atobe, easily plucking it from Sengoku and handing it to Yuuta.

"Thank you," Yuuta said to Atobe. "I just wanted to know what you wanted earlier, Kirihara."

Yuuta was smiling innocently and pleasantly. Kirihara only looked like he was going to join the snapping necks club.

"All right, moving along…" Sengoku rolled his eyes and took the translator back. "About a hundred paces forward, there's going to be a ladder. We'll be right underneath the king's throne room. Hopefully he'll be there. We'll climb up, slaughter him and then Kabaji will teleport us all back to the ship! Easy as pie."

"Then we'll be out of here." Oishi added cheerfully.

"That is a fact." Mizuki agreed.

They started their paces and once they were in view of the ladder, they started to frolic towards it. Even though their journey was far from over, the closer they got to the ladder, the closer they got to jumping Universes.

All of a sudden, a lone alien jumped out from a crevice in the wall with his gun drawn and fired it at the group. It just so happened to hit Sengoku in the chest and he went flying up against the wall located on the other side of the hallway. Everyone gasped and couldn't immediately react, but thankfully Kabaji was paying attention because he proceeded to own the alien by first gouging the torch into his eye and then shooting him in one of the places the armor wasn't protecting him, causing him to vaporize.

When the alien was a pile of ashes, the others decided they should probably check on Sengoku.

They were confused at first as to why he hadn't vaporized like everyone else, but Yuuta was the first to distressingly discover that the blast had hit the translator. You see, Sengoku had put the translator in his shirt pocket so he would have been able to climb the ladder.

Yuuta picked up the pitiful remains of his only hope and nearly started to weep.

"Is he alive?" Oishi asked as he put his hand on Sengoku's neck to check his pulse. He waited a few moments. "Well, he's got a pulse at least, but he's definitely unconscious."

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"Oh no." said Ryou. "We were giving him crap before but he really IS the Cobra Commander."

"What are we going to do?" Taka fretted.

Yuuta turned to Mizuki and started speaking to him in Elfish. Everyone waited patiently for their conversation to finish and finally Mizuki turned to them to translate.

"Okay, so Yuuta says that he can heal Sengoku." He said.

Everyone waited.

"So…why isn't he?" Atobe asked.

"Because after he does, he'll get really weak and probably pass out." Mizuki replied. "But his reasoning is that Sengoku knows what he's doing better than he does so he thinks it would be a good trade-off."

"Okay so hurry up before more aliens come!" ordered Kirihara.

Mizuki looked at Yuuta, said something to him and nodded.

Yuuta put his hands out over Sengoku and then the two of them were engulfed with a shimmering light. It was… well… I'd have to say that it was nearly funderful. But not quite.

Everyone assumed the healing process was over once Sengoku sat up and Yuuta fell down. After they explained the situation to Sengoku, he got to his feet and announced that Yuuta's sacrifice would not be in vain!

"He's not dead," Taka reported as he took it upon himself to be the Yuuta carrier because everyone else was either too lazy or realize there would be consequences if Fuji discovered that they had all decided to kill Yuuta and leave him there instead of carrying him around dead weight. And, as cruel as that sounds, that probably would have been the logical choice.

"Well you know what I mean!" said Sengoku, looking up at the ladder. "Remember to stay by me and Kabaji so you'll get teleported back to the ship with us after the king is killed! Well let's go! What are we waiting for?"

"YEAH!" cheered everyone as they one by one started following Sengoku up the ladder to almost certain doom…


	85. Conquered

Channel 85- Conquered

Sengoku took a deep breath and with one mighty heave, he pushed the tile up out of the ceiling, moved it aside and then leapt up onto the floor with his weapon drawn.

He was ready to kill some aliens but when he looked around the room, he realized that he had not leapt into the throne room of the lair.

"Is the king dead yet?" came Oishi's voice.

"No, this was the wrong ladder…" Sengoku said, looking annoyed.

The others came up the ladder and looked around as well. They were in some random grand looking room that was essentially empty, but the ceiling was quite tall.

"Then what room is it?" Kirihara said.

"Usu," Kabaji said as he put the tile back into place.

"Yeah." Sengoku nodded. "That being said, the throne room shouldn't be too far away."

Sengoku whipped out a large scroll and unrolled it. It revealed itself to be the plans of the entire castle.

"Why didn't you tell us you had this?" demanded Atobe.

"Why am I required to do that?" said Sengoku.

"Because we're a team, OBVIOUSLY." Atobe replied.

"WHATEVER." Said Sengoku as he lied out the map on the ground. "All right, the king's throne room is here…"

He pointed to the largest room.

"And we're…here?" he tried, pointing to a room that was right underneath it.

"Did you not take into account that the king's throne room was going to be one flight above the underground tunnel?" questioned Mizuki.

"Well…no." said Sengoku because there was no way to lie about it. "All we have to do is go up one level and we'll be where we want to be."

"How do we get up?" Ryou asked. "I don't see any stairs or anything on the map."

"The Zagathyrns don't use stairs," Sengoku answered as he pointed at a tunnel on the map that led to the throne room. "They crawl through tunnels. It's the most natural for them."

"Okay so why was there a _ladder_ leading from underground to here?" said Oishi critically.

"I don't know!" said Sengoku. "It's a plot hole! Whatever! All we have to do is go out this door, and there should be a tunnel leading up…"

"How are we supposed to climb straight up?" Yukimura asked.

"You're all such pansies." Said Sengoku as he rolled up the scroll. "We just have to tough it out."

"Couldn't we use the teleporter to make ourselves appear one floor up?" asked Mizuki.

"No, because it'll only work once and if we use it to go up one flight then there will no way for us to get back to the ship…remember?" Sengoku pointed out.

Mizuki looked thoughtful. "Oh right." He nodded.

"So let's go," Sengoku said.

"One more question," said Taka. "In the event that an alien starts to use one of these tunnels while we're struggling to ascend it, what do we do?"

"That's when we turn to Kirihara's stick of dynamite." Sengoku answered.

"What?" said Kirihara.

"We light the dynamite and just blow up the whole place." Sengoku replied with a shrug.

"But won't WE blow up too?" Atobe reminded him.

"Yes," said Sengoku. "But you guys said these were fake deaths. And if we're all dead and the king is dead then everyone back at the ship will be able to jump Universes, right?"

"I guess…" said the others half heartedly.

"Anymore questions?" Sengoku said.

"No…" everyone replied.

Sengoku went to the doors and opened them a smidge. He peeked out and spotted the tunnel at the end of the hallway. He gestured for everyone to follow him as he rolled across the ground copiously like he was James Bond. Everyone else, on the other hand, were getting rather tired of Sengoku's enthusiastic antics, so they just trudged after him.

"I'll go first!" said Sengoku as he went to the tunnel in the side of the wall and then looked up to see it was completely straight.

"How are you going to do that?" Yukimura asked, looking up as well.

"May I use your lasso, Kirihara?" Sengoku asked.

Kirihara handed over said item. Then Sengoku took one of Yuuta's arrows and tied the lasso to the end of it. Then he gave Yuuta's bow and the arrow to Kabaji.

"Go ahead." He said.

Kabaji raised the bow and shot it up the tunnel. The rope flew up with the arrow and then stopped as it lodged in the side of the tunnel.

Everyone paused a moment as Sengoku gave the rope a tug to test the stability.

"I must admit…I am impressed with your ability to adjust and use your resources available." Atobe said.

"Well, I AM a space cowboy." Said Sengoku as if that had any relevance.

"That doesn't have any relevance." Atobe pointed out.

"Shut up!" said Sengoku.

"But is the arrow going to be able to hold your weight?" Ryou asked.

"What…you guys thought I was going to climb up the rope?" Sengoku said skeptically.

No one knew how to respond.

"I was just using the rope and arrow to see how far the tunnel went up." Sengoku explained as he took a fancy looking gun from his belt. "I wanted to make sure that this would make it up."

He pointed the gun upwards and shot it. A durable looking cord lined parallel to the rope and then went still as the end of it lodged in the wall next to the arrow. Then Sengoku attached the other end to his belt.

"Well, it IS long enough!" Sengoku said, looking satisfied as he readied himself to be propelled upwards.

Atobe walked right up to Sengoku and smacked him.

"Hey!" said Sengoku.

"Next time… tell us what you're doing." Said Atobe. "I don't know what pleasure you gain from leaving us in the dark, but it has to stop now."

"Fine!" said Sengoku, rolling his eyes. "Okay, I'll go up and kill the king, then I'll come back down and we can teleport out of here."

"Wait, you're not going to bring us with you?" Oishi said.

"No…didn't I tell you that?" Sengoku asked.

"NO." said everyone.

"Seems kind of ludicrous to bring everyone if all we need is one gunshot." Sengoku said with a shrug as he pressed the button on his belt and shot up through the tunnel.

Everyone was just about to rant about Sengoku when Kabaji whipped out a gun identical to the one Sengoku had used, shot it up in the tunnel, and followed Sengoku before anyone could utter a word.

Sengoku and Kabaji both reached the top of the tunnel and hovered in midair by their belts for a second.

"Okay, Kabaji, we need a plan." Said Sengoku.

"Usu." Said Kabaji.

"No." Sengoku shook his head. "Do you have any ideas?"

"Usu," Kabaji said after a moment's pause.

Sengoku mulled it over. "I like the way you think." Sengoku said.

"Hey you two, hurry up!" Mizuki called up the tunnel.

"All right, Kabaji, on the count of three." Sengoku said.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"One…two…THREE!" Sengoku yelled as he pushed off the wall and dove through the tunnel with his blaster raised, and Kabaji soon followed suit. There were a few aliens in the throne room, including the king, and it's a wonder they didn't hear everyone talking for so long, but they looked frazzled as they ran around helplessly. The king sat on his throne and flailed, but otherwise didn't do anything, until Sengoku finally ran up to him and shot him.

The king writhed in pain like a moron for a little while and then he fell limp.

Sengoku stood there and waited for something else to happen.

Then he looked over at Kabaji who had just finished owning all the guards.

Kabaji shrugged.

"That's it?" Sengoku asked.

Kabaji shrugged again.

"I was expecting more." Sengoku admitted, shrugging as well. He pulled out the bounty poster from his pocket. "Why does he have such a high bounty if he was so easy to kill?"

"Usu," Kabaji said.

"Probably." Sengoku agreed.

"Usu," Kabaji said again.

"Yeah, we should probably get back to the others." Sengoku said. "That was super easy."

They went back to the tunnel and jumped down. Other than injured ankles, they were all right, so they just popped back up and everyone else was a little frantic.

"Calm down, calm down." Sengoku said. "It's no problem. There are no more guards around. The king was… surprisingly easy to kill."

"…" everyone 'replied'.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"Right as usual, Kabaji." Said Sengoku. "Get us out of here!"

Kabaji pressed the button and everyone was teleported back to the ship. It just so happened to be a room in which some people were chillaxing, and they nearly had heart attacks when the others suddenly appeared in the room. You would think that, by now, everyone would be rather hardened to sudden surprises, huh?

After everyone was gathered, Inui cleared his throat.

"The remote says that the mission is complete." He reported.

Everyone threw a party.

"Now we must wait for the white light." Inui said.

The party continued.

And it went on for like ten minutes.

The partying was starting to dwindle.

"Okay…why isn't it coming…?" Kaidou said.

Just then, Hiyoshi walked in the room.

"Oh, it was because Hiyoshi wasn't here." Inui said.

"I just came back to report that we made it to the castle just so you guys don't send out a third search party." He said.

And then he turned to leave, but Atobe grabbed his collar and pulled him back.

"Hiyoshi's sudden appearance coupled by what he has just said suddenly made me realize that we are at a lack of several members of Hyoutei." He said. "Namely; Oshitari, Gakuto and Jirou."

Silence.

"Oh yeah…" said everyone uneasily.

Meanwhile…

"Yuushi!" cheered Gakuto. "Look, I found a tunnel! Let's go in it!"

"Well, it IS where the footprints are leading us…" Oshitari said.

"It's so dark…" Jirou said with a frown.


	86. Space Pirates

Channel 86- Space Pirates

"What are we going to do?" Eiji gasped as he grabbed Oishi and shook him around. "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?"

"Calm down!" Oishi commanded as he held Eiji steady. "It's all right."

"IS IT?" Eiji practically shrieked.

"Yes, there's no need to worry." Inui said.

"Why?" Eiji's eyes filled with tears.

"Because," Inui began. "Either Gakuto, Jirou and Oshitari get killed doing whatever they do or they return unharmed. No matter what happens, the remote will still take us to the next Universe."

"So all we have to do is stay together and wait for the white light?" Taka said.

"Oh good…" Eiji gave a sigh of relief.

"Lucky!" said Sengoku. "As long as the aliens don't find our ship and kill us for murdering their leader, we'll be FINE!"

Pretty much everyone smacked Sengoku at that point.

"WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?" demanded Momo.

"We're as good as dead!" Eiji wailed.

"Get a hold of yourself, Eiji…" Oishi slapped his forehead.

"The odds of the aliens finding us are almost nonexistent." Renji commented.

Just then, they heard the beating of war drums. Distant, but still present.

"Hm…" said everyone.

"Hiyoshi, did anyone follow you on your way back here?" Atobe asked as he looked out the window and saw a large army of reptile-like aliens stampeding towards the ship.

"I guess they did," Hiyoshi observed as he looked out the window as well. "I didn't think to make sure no one was."

"You led them right to us?" Tachibana reasoned.

"Don't even talk, Tachibana." Said Tezuka. "It's all your fault that we're not leaping Universes right now."

"How is this MY fault?" said Tachibana.

"It was your idea to send out a second rescue party." Tezuka reminded him. "Had you not done that, we would have been able to go the next Universe once all these guys returned."

"How about instead of arguing, we get out of here?" Mizuki suggested. "You know, fly away…?"

"I already told you!" Sengoku said. "The ship is shut down for a few hours!"

"How cruelly ironic!" Mizuki said, striking a pose of despair.

"So what are we going to do?" fretted Kirihara.

"Let's just send Yuuta and his gay Pegasus to pick them up and bring them back!" said Atsushi.

"Yuuta's still unconscious." Taka reported.

"Poor Yuuta," sighed Fuji. "So heroic."

"Okay…how about we send Ootori to get them?" Kaidou tried.

"Ootori is dead." Oishi pointed out.

"Actually, he's a zombie." Kaidou said.

"What?" said Oishi, raising an eyebrow.

"I sucked his blood while he was dead and he became my zombie slave." Renji said.

"You can do that?" Oishi looked impressed.

"I'm a vampire." Renji said. "I can do whatever I want."

"True dat." Said Oishi, and everyone told him never to say that again.

"This is all well and good but the hoard of aliens is slowly getting closer!" Sanada reported.

"I suppose we could break out the space cannons…" Sengoku rubbed his chin.

Everyone stared at him.

"Space cannons?" they repeated.

"Yup." Said Sengoku.

"You said you didn't have space cannons, Mr. Space COWBOY." Said Ryou.

"Well…maybe I sort of stretched the truth…" Sengoku admitted.

"By LYING?" inferred Momo angrily.

"Hey look, I didn't want you guys to think I was a space pirate!" said Sengoku.

"Face it Sengoku," said Inui. "You are a space pirate. You have pillaged goods from ships you destroy, you run around killing aliens even when you don't know anything about them and you have space cannons. It's all right, though. Being a pirate is not THAT bad."

"Being a cowboy IS better though…" Kirihara said with a sigh.

"We are no longer distracted by your cowboy-like attire." Mizuki crossed his arms.

"Uh…aliens? Getting closer?" Yukimura tried, joining Sanada at the window.

"We'll talk about this later, all right?" said Sengoku angrily. "Let's just channel whatever power we have left in this hunk of junk to the space cannons and blast them all right off the planet! Kabaji?"

"Usu," said Kabaji as he departed.

Everyone coughed and uttered 'pirates' under their breath.

"How many cannons do you have?" Inui inquired.

"Eight on the side facing the aliens." Sengoku answered.

"All right, who here has no abilities when it comes to fighting?" Inui asked.

"Fuji and Oishi." Said Momo.

"Momo…" Fuji said, clenching his fist slightly.

"WHAT?" Momo said, trying to sound as innocent as possible.

"So you two can work two of the cannons." Inui said. "Anyone else?"

"Me!" said Eiji.

"No, Eiji, you have your knife and you are Taka's squire so you need to assist him." Inui said.

Eiji deflated. "Aww…" he said, looking sad.

"Let's see… Yukimura, Sanada, Tachibana, Tezuka… and the twins." Inui said.

"What about me?" said Kaidou. "I can't do anything.

"Here, take my sword." Said Inui, handing Kaidou his sword.

Kaidou looked annoyed. "Why?" he said.

"Because I'm going to stand here and hold the remote." Inui said courageously.

"Why couldn't you have given it to someone else?" said Kaidou. "I'll work one of the cannons!"

"Just consider swinging the sword as practice for the Boomerang Snake." Inui said, miming a swing of the sword.

Kaidou was about to continue to argue but then he looked contemplative, and hastily took the sword before anyone could say anything or even notice an exchange had taken place.

Sengoku left with those chosen to show them where the cannons were.

"Shinji and Hiyoshi," Inui went on. "Would you be able to transport five people on two brooms?"

"Um…I'm not sure." Said Hiyoshi.

"Well, Hiyoshi, take Shinji to where the others are," Inui said. "And attempt to bring them back. If it doesn't work, then just kill yourselves."

Shinji and Hiyoshi didn't answer at first.

"Can someone else do this mission?" Shinji asked.

"No, now go." Inui ordered.

"Oh yes and I can't go outside because there are five suns and… well yeah." Renji said.

"Would your zombie slaves be able to go out there?" Inui asked.

"No." Renji answered.

"Then…go off and do nothing like you usually do." Inui shrugged.

"All right." Said Renji as he wandered off. Inui joined him since he was done with his plans and he wasn't going to be doing anything either, so they figured they'd do nothing productive TOGETHER!

Sengoku and Kabaji returned and just when the remaining few people (which is NINE from the original THIRTY at this point) were going to charging out into the suns at the aliens, they noticed that Mizuki was just chilling behind them holding The Eye since he had apparently gone off and gotten it when no one was looking.

"What?" asked Kirihara.

"I just looked in The Eye…so I'm going to stay here." Mizuki said, shrugging it off as if it was nothing.

The others looked at each other.

"So…how long would this ship last against the aliens if we just locked it up and stayed in here?" Momo asked Sengoku.

"Er…long enough." Sengoku decided.

Meanwhile, Oshitari, Gakuto and Jirou were fleeing from the cave they had originally decided to explore. Why you ask? Because once they reached the corpses of aliens that had been previously murdered, several more aliens came towards them and accused them of the atrocity. They realized that the only way to escape their horrible and inevitable fate would be to run as fast as they could in the opposite direction.

They backtracked, stepping on their own footprints in an attempt to make it back to the ship without getting lost. But let's face it: two ninjas and a badass detective are not about to get lost. DOING ANYTHING.

Fortunately, these aliens weren't particularly fast (as we saw how slowly they advanced the ship previously) so the Hyoutei trio was able to outrun them and even had enough time to stop and take a rest.

"Are we going to have to run like this all the way back to the ship?" Jirou said despairingly as he sat down.

"Jirou, we are currently in an intense chase scene." Oshitari said. "We are only resting a moment. Please stand up."

"I'm too tired!" said Jirou. "I'll just stay here. It's only fake deaths anyway so I'll see you guys at the next Universe."

Gakuto and Oshitari looked at each other skeptically and then saw the aliens were approaching them.

"Jirou, come on!" said Gakuto as he grabbed Jirou's arm and attempted to pull him to his feet.

"I'm too tired!" Jirou whined.

Oshitari shook his head disappointingly. Just then, from above them, they saw Hiyoshi and Shinji coming towards them. Whence they landed, there was only time for a quick explanation before they started to try to mount the brooms.

"Look, if we don't all mount these two brooms then we all have to kill ourselves," said Hiyoshi. "So let's do it…"

Oshitari joined Hiyoshi and Gakuto joined Shinji. And Jirou was getting so annoying and defiant that Oshitari got fed up and shot him so they wouldn't have to carry him. Yes. He KILLED Jirou. It wouldn't be the first time that someone killed Jirou, mind you.

So they zoomed back to the ship. They found that the aliens were climbing all over the ship and poking it with spears and attempting to find an opening. There were a lot of alien corpses littered around, especially near the giant charred craters from the space cannons.

"I thought they were all going to be out here fighting." Said Hiyoshi.

"How are we supposed to get inside?" Gakuto questioned, looking somewhat irritated that someone else hadn't thought of this problem first.

"Well, Shinji, you were working on apparating at school, weren't you?" Hiyoshi asked.

"Yeah," said Shinji. "But I can't even apparate myself, let alone four people."

The four of them sat there pensively for a moment and were just about to sigh and give up when they noticed a space cannon ball was coming right towards them. It hit them. And then they died.

Inside the ship, Fuji gave a contented sigh as he leaned away from the controls. Inui happened to be walking by.

"What did you do that is making you so contented?" Inui asked.

"Well—" Fuji began.

"Never mind." Said Inui. "I don't even know why I asked."

Then he noticed that there was a white light around him.

"Now I REALLY don't want to know…" he said to himself as he pressed the button.

Renji sizzled up and died as they were engulfed. But then he came back to life. They all appeared and, before they even looked around, they decided to settle some differences. They had an abbreviated meeting in which everyone got out their feelings and decided to put the past behind them and avoid murdering anyone else. After all, they were in the last Universe.

"LAST UNIVERSE?" everyone exclaimed joyfully.

Slowly, they spun around to get a look at their surroundings…


	87. The Future

Channel 87- The Future

The buildings were tall and close together, and most of them were white with smoothed corners. The streets had only people strolling down them and were too narrow for a car. As a matter of fact, there were no motor vehicles in the area whatsoever.

"What is this weird place?" said Oshitari finally.

"Well, I'm just glad there's no sun." Renji said.

Everyone looked at him quizzically. It was light enough where they were, but for the first time they decided to look at the sky. The first thing that surprised them were the objects whizzing around in the area, as if there were several hundred tiny airplanes making their way around the city. Then they observed a large metal covering that appeared to encase the space, protecting it from the sun.

"All right…" said Inui. "Ootori, why don't you go up there and see what that dome is made out of?"

"Okay!" said Choutarou, wanting to be helpful since he had been out of commission for a while.

He leapt up into the air but fell flat on his face in a matter of seconds.

Everyone slapped their foreheads and demanded to know what the problem was.

"How long was I dead for…?" Choutarou said, trying to count on his fingers.

"Why does that matter?" asked Eiji. "If you're dead for a certain amount of time then you can't fly? Is that it?"

"No…" Choutarou frowned.

"Let's go into a shop and check out a calendar or something." Shishido said before anyone else could barrage Choutarou with completely justified questioning.

So they went into the closest shop and asked the woman behind the counter where they could find the calendars. She pointed them to an isle and they walked down. (Oddly enough, she didn't find the presence of thirty young people dressed like freaks particularly strange…)

When they reached the stationary isle, they went straight for the calendars. Shishido picked it up and flipped it to the unspecified month. There was nothing there that indicated anything.

"Don't calendars usually write down the moon's phases?" Shishido said quizzically.

"Are you saying that it's the New Moon so you've lost all your powers again?" Inui said.

"…I actually never said anything…" Choutarou said quietly and passively.

"Hey, did Choutarou ever do anything to you?" Shishido said protectively.

"Yes." Said Inui. "He lost his powers."

"I can't believe we've been bouncing around Universes for that long!" Momo said with a depressed sigh.

"We have one more person to find and then we're all done." Inui started but then he got distracted when Shishido put the calendar down. Everyone waited for him to continue, and then they followed his eyes to the calendar, and then EVERYONE got distracted.

"Does that say what I think it says?" said YOUR favorite character. Assuming he is present.

"If you think that it says the year is 2500, then yes." Said Tezuka as he picked up the calendar and looked it over. (Hopefully your favorite character isn't Tezuka or else he may have just answered his own question and in that case, he would look quite silly.)

"We're in the future?" gasped Gakuto.

"So it would seem…" Tezuka said, putting the calendar back down.

They went back up to the lady behind the counter and inquired to her what the year was, and she answered that it was 2500, and they thanked her, and then they left the store.

"Well." Said Sanada, pointing up. "That would explain the hover cars."

"And the crazy dome." Yukimura added.

"With the dome there, I won't be able to get in the light of the moon tomorrow night!" said Choutarou. "If it's blocking out the sun then it is most certainly blocking out the moon as well!"

Everyone was tempted to strangle Choutarou for losing his powers at the most inconvenient of times (and Fuji actually almost did) but they refrained at the very last second. And it was a good thing too, because if Choutarou could be killed by Fuji even WITH his super powers then it's likely his head would have popped right off if Fuji had even thought about committing murder again.

"It doesn't matter though." Inui said.

"OH IT DOESN'T?" said everyone.

"We have gotten by before without having Ootori's powers." Inui pointed out.

"Yes, but those were all the times we were closest to failing." Taka pointed out.

"That being said, I make a motion that we all stay together while searching for this final person." Inui said as if that had any relevance to anything anyone was EVER talking about.

"HERE HERE!" cheered everyone.

And thus they vowed to remain together.

As they walked and searched for this crazy person, Yuuta suddenly began to bother Shishido. It was bad enough that Shishido was already being bothered by Kentarou's constant attempts to claim him as his own, but as Yuuta continuously tapped him on the shoulder, Shishido had finally had enough.

"WHAT IS IT?" Shishido demanded.

"Don't yell at Yuuta!" commanded everyone who had a crush on Yuuta. Go on, you can do it too if you have a crush on him. We're not here to judge.

"Sorry, he's just bothering me!" said Shishido.

Choutarou came over and asked Yuuta why he was bother Yuuta.

"Shishido, Yuuta says that you have a translator in your utility belt that he can use so other people can understand him."

"Tell him I don't." said Shishido.

"YOU DO." Said everyone.

Shishido was taken aback, but then he decided to search his utility belt. As he defied all the laws of physics, everyone waited patiently. And just when he certainly would have risen triumphant, Taka suddenly let out a large gasp, causing all the attention to fall on him.

"What is it, Taka?" said Fuji, all concerned like.

"I thought I just saw…?" Taka started as he moved away from the group and then looked back. "Maybe I was hallucinating."

"What did you see?" asked Tezuka.

"I thought I just saw…" Taka started, but then he gasped again. "I did! It's him!"

Taka started running off and everyone was left there with a question mark above their heads. Eventually, Taka's horse decided that he was lonely without Taka (since he had recently forsaken Kirihara's horse because of her obvious infidelity) so he darted after his dearest friend. Taka mounted his horse while still on the run, being very careful not to accidentally run anyone over or bludgeon them under his horse's hooves, and finally he seemed to catch up with whoever he was chasing.

"Wait!" he called as people dove out of the way.

The single person he was chasing finally stopped. Taka stopped on a dime and dismounted, looking this new character right in the eye.

"What?" said Akutsu.

"What what?" said Taka.

"Why are you following me?" demanded Akutsu angrily.

"Because!" said Taka. "You ARE Akutsu, aren't you?"

"Of course I am!" said Akutsu. "Who else would I be?"

"I don't know." Taka shrugged.

"So why did you chase me down?" Akutsu crossed his arms and looked childish.

"Because you started running away." Taka replied.

"So?" said Akutsu.

"Why'd you run away?" Taka asked.

"Because the last thing I want is to have to deal with you guys."

"But if you come back with us then we can all go home."

"Go home?" Akutsu repeated.

"Yeah." Said Taka. "In this case, back to our original time. This obviously isn't right. You know that, don't you?"

"Yes I know that!" said Akutsu in a mocking tone. "But what makes you think I want to go back home?"

"Don't you?"

"No!" said Akutsu.

"Why not?"

"Because here is the future. Everything's better here. And I don't have to deal with all of you guys or stupid tennis."

Taka almost fainted because someone had dared insult tennis, but he regained his composure.

"Why are you dressed like that anyway?" said Akutsu, looking disgusted.

"That's not important right now!" said Taka.

"I was happy and fine before you guys all showed up. Now if you think I'm going to come back with you then you're wrong. You guys do whatever you want but I'm staying here!"

"You can't stay here." Said Taka. "This isn't your Universe! It's none of ours. And besides, we can't go back home unless you come with us!"

"That's not my problem." Said Akutsu as he started walking away.

"Actually, it IS your problem!" said Taka. "It's all of our problems. We all want to go home and you are the last person we have to find! We've been wandering around for a very long time and if you just come back with us then it'll all be done!"

"Well too bad!" said Akutsu. "I'm not coming! Find your own way home!"

With that, Akutsu sprinted towards a tube that was in the middle of the pathway that stretched up into the sky and away. When he stood under it, a green light flashed and it sucked him up inside. In seconds he disappeared.

Taka gaped and ran over to the tube to follow him, but a red light beeped and he didn't go anywhere. A card popped out of a machine nearby that stated, "Insufficient credits".

Taka stared at the card and looked as irritated as NON Burning!Mode Taka can look.

The other twenty-nine friends suddenly rounded the corner and ran over to Taka.

"What was that all about?" said Kaidou.

"It was Akutsu!" Taka said.

"Where'd he go?" asked Sengoku.

Taka looked sad. "He ran away because he said he didn't want to go back."

Everyone was silent.

"Did you calmly explain to him that he doesn't have a choice?" asked Fuji.

"I very calmly and nicely explained that it was the only way for us to get home!" said Taka, looking despaired.

Everyone looked distraught for a little while, and then they all simultaneously turned to Inui. Inui was still looking distraught to himself, and quickly realized that everyone was looking at him.

"All right…" said Inui, realizing everyone was waiting for a genius plan. "This city is quite vast judging by how far the dome stretches in the distance. Though it goes against our previous pact, I think the only thing we can do is separate into small groups and forcefully detain Akutsu."

Nobody liked the idea but it's not like they came up with anything better.

"If we do this, we have to do it right." Said Tezuka. "There will be no letting our guards down, got it?"

"All right Tezuka." Said everyone just to humor him.

"So what are we doing?" Tachibana asked. "Two groups of fifteen? Three groups of ten?"

"I recommend ten groups of three." Inui said.

"Those are really small groups…" Jirou said.

"We can cover more ground that way." Inui replied. "At the end of the day, we'll all meet here in this very spot. I will split everyone up logically so this will be an effective search."

Everyone sort of cleared their throats and moved towards someone they would have preferred to group with.

Inui looked at them skeptically.

"Or…we could all pick our own groups?" he suggested.

"We like that idea!" everyone gave him the thumbs up.

"I'm going to suggest a strictly Fudomine group!" said Kamio cheerfully. Tachibana and Shinji agreed whole heartedly.

"JANE!" screamed Kentarou as he jumped on Shishido.

"I'll be in a group with anyone except him!" said Shishido, kicking Kentarou away.

"Do you want to be in a group with me, Shishido?" said Choutarou.

Shishido looked at everyone staring at him with devious smirks on their faces.

He grumbled and finally said, "Well, since we're both on Hyoutei and we play doubles together we might as well!"

"Following that logic, you and I should be in the same group, Gakuto." Oshitari offered.

"GLADLY!" said Gakuto.

"I'll be in YUUTA'S group." Said Fuji and Mizuki at the same time as they each grabbed one of Yuuta's arms. Then they glared at each other as Yuuta sighed, not quite sure what had sparked their actions but knowing it annoyed him.

"Kabaji, you're with me." Said Atobe, snapping his fingers.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"Well obviously." Said Sengoku.

"What?" said Atobe to Sengoku.

"Kabaji asked if I wanted to be the third person in the group." Said Sengoku. "And I obliged."

Atobe didn't know if he should be offended or throw a temper tantrum, so he remained completely stoic as he stared at Sengoku who couldn't be bothered.

"Renji, do you want to be in a group with me?" said Inui.

"Of course, Sadaharu." Said Renji.

"And I want to be near the remote, so I'll come along with you two." Tezuka said.

"Aw!" said Eiji. "Me and Oishi were going to ask you to be in our group, Tezuka…"

"It's all right, Eiji." Said Oishi. That's right, the Golden Pair didn't even have to ask each other if they were going to both be in the same group. It was a given.

"Let's invite Ryoma then!" cheered Eiji as he grabbed Ryoma and pulled him into a big hug.

"No…" whined Ryoma.

"I was going to ask you to be in MY group, Ryoma, but I guess I'm stuck with the leftover Seigaku group!" said Momo, looking back at Taka and Kaidou who both waved.

"We might as well do an all Rikkai Dai except Renji thing." Said Sanada to Yukimura and Kirihara.

"That works." Yukimura shrugged.

"I love other people from my team being here!" said Kirihara giddily.

"Jirou and Hiyoshi, since you two don't have groups yet, I want each of you to join the two doubles pairs so we can keep Hyoutei together." Atobe ordered.

"You guys get Jirou!" said the Dirty Pair as they snatched Hiyoshi and stuck out their tongues.

"We like him more than Hiyoshi anyway!" said Shishido, secretly cursing them on the inside.

"Who's left?" said Inui.

"Only the twins and Kentarou." Said Mizuki.

"Worst group EVER!" whined Atsushi.

"And we don't like being referred to as 'the twins'!" said Ryou.

"Jane!" screamed Kentarou as Shishido kept him at an arm's length.

"Okay, so one more time, everyone meet back here at the end of the day." Said Inui. "Hopefully one of the ten groups will have apprehended Akutsu by then. Good luck everyone."

They returned the good luck, and thus the ten groups separated in search of the one that plagued them.


	88. Clash of the Egos

Channel 88- Clash of the Egos:  
Sengoku, Atobe, Kabaji

"So here we are…the year 2500…" Sengoku said as he put his hands on his hips and looked up at the dome that was covering the sky, shining artificial light down upon them. "Well…it's not as… FUTURISTIC as I would have expected."

"Usu." Said Kabaji.

"You can say that again." Said Sengoku with a nod.

Atobe frowned.

"Why do you do that?" he asked Sengoku.

"Do what?" Sengoku asked.

"Respond to Kabaji as if he is saying something other than 'usu'." Atobe answered.

"Well why do YOU do THAT?" Sengoku asked.

"What do you mean?" said Atobe, crossing his arms. "Do what?"

"Not even bother responding to Kabaji because you're under the impression that all he is saying is 'usu'." Sengoku replied.

Atobe didn't know what to say. He felt as though someone had just slapped him across the face.

"Are you telling me that he is saying something else?" Atobe questioned.

"Well," said Sengoku. "I've never met him before prior to this Universe hopping thing, but I'm willing to bet he's a human in our regular Universe, right?"

Atobe blinked. "Is that a serious question?" he inquired.

"I'll take that as a yes…" said Sengoku.

"Are you implying that in that Universe we found you in, Kabaji is actually an alien?" Atobe said.

"Well, in the sense of everything being an alien if they're not from earth, then yes." Sengoku said. And then he proudly added, "And so I am!"

"I'm assuming that there's a point to this inquiry…" Atobe led.

"Why yes!" Sengoku said. "I am well versed in the language from the planet that Kabaji comes from. So, while it may just sound like jibber jabber to YOU…"

"Or just one word." Atobe pointed out.

"Exactly," said Sengoku.

They were just about to continue their pointless banter when some random guy walked up to them and just stood there as if they enjoyed his presence and had requested that he would come over and stand next to them.

"Can we help you?" Sengoku said finally.

"I just wanted to get a picture with the local freaks!" said the guy as he turned around and struck a pose as his wife took a picture with a superbly futuristic looking camera.

He and his wife cheered and ran away, leaving Atobe and Sengoku absolutely shocked. Kabaji looked exactly the same as he always did.

"FREAKS?" Atobe repeated. "That man just called us FREAKS."

"I can see why he called YOU a freak." Said Sengoku.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" said Atobe.

"You're gray." Sengoku said. "Haven't you realized this?"

"Why do people act as though I don't know that I am gray?" Atobe said.

"Because you don't appear to be doing anything proactive about the situation you're in." Sengoku replied.

"What could I POSSIBLY do to remedy the problem?" Atobe pointed out.

"Well, under normal circumstances, I WOULD say there's nothing you can do…" Sengoku rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "But this IS the future…"

Atobe as just about to call Sengoku a knave, grab Kabaji and run but then he realized that what Sengoku was saying had some validity.

"Go on." Atobe urged.

"You never know what kind of crazy things they can do in the future!" Sengoku answered. "Let's make our way to the nearest mall!"

So they frolicked off to the nearest mall without even asking Kabaji if he wanted to come. But they didn't really care since he's Kabaji and therefore he automatically has no say in the matter anyway.

When they reached the mall (they have a really good sense of direction to be able to find something in a place in which they have never been in such a timely manner) they found that the only way to enter the mall was to be sucked up through a tube.

After standing outside the mall looking perplexed for a little while, they were finally passed by some teenage girls who all stood under the tube individually and soon disappeared.

"What ever happened to DOORS?" Sengoku said, sounding appalled. "Doors worked just fine!"

"We might as well," Atobe said with a sigh. He snapped his fingers. "Kabaji, you go first."

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"What did he say?" Atobe asked Sengoku.

"'Yes'." Sengoku answered.

Atobe glared at Sengoku even though he didn't do anything wrong as Kabaji went over to the tube and stood underneath it. When nothing happened, Atobe noticed that a little card had spat out of a machine nearby.

"Insufficient credits?" Atobe read, looking mightily confused.

"Hm…" said Sengoku as he snatched the card from Atobe who obviously became more offended than he needed to be, so of course he snatched it right back.

"Here on the back…" Atobe observed. "It says that Kabaji currently has zero credits, and needs ten to get into the mall."

"Does it say how we go about getting credits?" Sengoku questioned.

"We probably have to buy them." Atobe said, continuing to inspect the card as if it would give him more information.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"Oh." Said Sengoku, turning to Atobe. "Kabaji says that he overheard those girls talking about credits, because one was commenting on how she only had a few credits left. Apparently, for every hour of community service or good deed you do, you get fifty credits and if we want to enter any buildings or buy something then we shouldn't bother trying to get away with not having credits."

Atobe looked at Sengoku skeptically. "And you got all that from what Kabaji just said?" he inferred.

"I paraphrased." Sengoku replied. "Apparently this system keeps the world harmonious."

"I understand where they are coming from, but it's annoying." Atobe said.

"Well it's not like it would have mattered if we could have gone into the mall, since we don't have any money anyway." Sengoku shrugged.

"How would they even KNOW if we did a good deed?" Atobe said, disregarding Sengoku entirely.

"There's an address on the machine here…" Sengoku said. "In order to get credits, we have to apply for them. Maybe if we go there, we can apply for credits."

They shrugged and figured they didn't have anything better to do so why not? Of course, it must have simply slipped their minds that they were supposed to be looking for Akutsu.

So, using their incredible sense of direction, they discovered the only building in the entire city that actually still used a door. This was, of course, because this particular place was the only place where you could apply for credits, and it would be somewhat ludicrous if the place you were applying for credits required credits to enter!

Whence they entered, they found they were pretty much surrounded by aliens. It was initially startling, but they figured that must be normal for the future since everyone else was like: NO PROBLEM HERE.

The woman behind the counter looked like she would rather be any place in the entire world when Atobe came up to the counter. "I would like to apply for credits," he said.

"That's a surprise," said the lady rudely. "Fill out this questionnaire."

"Questionnaire?" Atobe repeated as he took a stack of papers from the lady. Sengoku and Kabaji each took one, and the three of them sat down on one of the empty benches to go through the packets.

"You'd think they'd have some kind of futuristic computer high tech method of going about asking this kind of stuff." Sengoku said.

"What is this nonsense?" said Atobe, looking at the top of the questionnaire to see that it said, 'Earth Citizenship Request'. "I am ALREADY a citizen of Earth!"

In his enraged state, Atobe stomped back over to the lady and shoved another alien out of the way. "Excuse me, but I am not an alien," he said. "I already have an earth's citizenship."

"If you're not in our system, then there's no way you could have an Earth's citizenship." Said the lady. "Besides…" she looked him up and down. "You're gray. Humans aren't gray."

"Well I am!" said Atobe.

"Look, I've already dealt with someone from your planet today." Said the lady. "So don't bother."

"Someone from my planet?" Atobe demanded angrily.

"Here are our papers!" said Sengoku as he pushed Atobe out of the way and then handed three stacks of papers to the lady. "My friend here has Earth Envy. Don't mind him."

Atobe just had this HOW DARE YOU expression as the lady stamped their papers and handed them cards with the number '100' written on the front.

"Here are your complimentary one hundred credits," said the lady. "Welcome to Earth. Enjoy your stay."

Sengoku hastily pushed Atobe out of the building.

"What do you think you're doing?" said Atobe.

"It's a flawed system." Said Sengoku. "She didn't even read any of the info I put down there. Besides, she said that she already dealt with someone from your planet today… so that means…"

Atobe followed. "Oshitari was here." He concluded.

"Right." Said Sengoku. "I'm willing to bet a lot of the guys came here! Look, and now we have one hundred free credits to go crazy with!"

"Let's go back to the mall," said Atobe. "I want to get some new clothes."

"What about finding some way to make yourself not gray anymore?" Sengoku questioned.

"Well, now that I have an ID that announces to the world that I am from another planet in which the people look exactly like humans except they're gray, it seems a little pointless so go about trying to change it, especially since we're going home so very soon."

"How very logical!" said Sengoku. "Come, Kabaji!"

"Usu," said Kabaji.

Sengoku started walking, and Kabaji followed him. Atobe's eye twitched.

"That's MY line," he called to Sengoku.

Sengoku stopped and turned around. "Come again?" he said with a very confused expression on his face as he returned to Atobe.

Atobe cleared his throat and snapped his fingers. "Come, Kabaji!" he declared as he started walking.

Sengoku watched the two of them go. "Whatever…" he said, shaking his head.


	89. Tennis

Channel 89- Tennis  
Shishido, Choutarou, Jirou

"So everything in this Universe is off limits unless we have theses 'credits'." Shishido said as he crossed his arms. "Is there anything we CAN do?"

Choutarou and Jirou both shrugged. Then they took note of a couple of boys walking by carrying bags that were in the shape of tennis rackets.

The trio looked at each other.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Jirou said.

"But we probably need credits for that too!" Choutarou pointed out.

"There's only one way to find out." Shishido said.

They tried not to look obvious about it but they were definitely following the boys to wherever they were going. They hoped that the boys were on their way TO tennis as opposed to home from it because if it was the latter then that would surely be very embarrassing!

Finally, off in the distance, they saw some tennis courts.

"OH SNAP!" they all said as they did a three way high five.

They bypassed the boys all together since they were walking FAR too slow for there to be TENNIS right in front of them! When they reached the courts, they found that there was some kind of competition being held.

"Become the Tennis King…" Shishido rubbed his chin thoughtfully as he looked at the banner strung across a booth where a man was handing out rackets.

They were game. Obviously because it had everything to do with tennis but also because if one of them were to be the KING of Tennis then they would surely have a leg up on Ryoma who was the Prince of Tennis. And we all know that that's what everyone strives to do.

The small group approached the booth.

"Come one, come all!" said the man behind the booth.

"Is it just your standard tennis game?" Jirou asked as he took a racket.

"Yup!" said the man behind the counter. "Participation is free! Defeat your opponents and be crowned this years KING of Tennis!"

They took rackets and numbers and stood in line. "I'm glad I lost my super powers for now," Choutarou said. "Because now I can compete based on my ability alone!"

Choutarou wanted to thrown in a little, "IF I win…" statement but he knew he wouldn't win because he idolized Shishido so much, and if Shishido was competing, he knew that he simply would not be able to defeat him.

"I'm just glad there's tennis in the future." Shishido said.

"Is everyone ready?" said the announcer, and everyone cheered. (Shishido, Choutarou and Jirou were the loudest of course.) The man reached into a basket with papers. "The first two competitors are… Number Eleven and Number Eight!"

"Hey, that's me!" said Jirou. "I'm Number Eleven!"

"Damn you…" said Choutarou and Shishido ON THE INSIDE since they were numbers nine and ten respectively. Though we can assume that Choutarou said DARN you.

Jirou got onto the court, and he noticed a few things quite different about normal tennis. First of all, the netting stretched all the way to the fence on either side, and the nets also went slightly higher. The court was larger and the lines were arranged just differently enough for it to be noticeable. Jirou wrote it off on minor changes in the game over the past five hundred years or so, but then a man with referee stripes walked out into the middle of the court.

"This is your standard game of tennis," said the man. "No hitting below the belt, no biting and no throwing your racket at any time. In the event of a SuperBlitz, an automatic winner will be declared instead of an UltimateBlitz. If anyone steps out of bounds, that player will forfeit. Your Spare Rations can be found just underneath the Fourth Hoop. Does everyone understand?"

"Yes," said the person who was Jirou's opponent.

"Wtf?" said Jirou.

"TENNIS!" said the man as he clapped his hands and ran outside the fence.

Jirou's opponent, who will be known as Zanzabar, immediately leapt out of Jirou's range just as three cannons on each side of the court emerged from the ground and catapulted tennis balls at them. Zanzabar immediately started hitting the balls onto Jirou's side of the court towards a group of five hoops. One of the balls went into the hoop, and a big number ONE lit up above the hoops.

"Come on Jirou!" Choutarou cheered from the sidelines.

Jirou still didn't really know what was going on but he decided to be proactive about the situation instead of sitting around and doing nothing. So he started hitting the balls to Zanzabar's side in attempt to hit the hoops.

"OUT! Penalty!" said the referee as he pointed at Jirou.

"Penalty?" Jirou said as a big question mark formed above his head, but also a giant mallet came from the ground and hit Jirou on the head. Since he is a cartoon character, he was all right and only stumbled a bit out of confusion before continuing. Of course, it didn't last long because Zanzabar hit a tennis ball right at him so it nearly knocked him over. Zanzabar hit another one towards him, but since Jirou is so good at returning tennis balls while in the midst of falling on his arse, he managed to do just that. There was not enough oomph to make it to the hoops, however, so Jirou got another mallet smash over the head.

"BLITZ!" shouted everyone as the tennis balls started firing out faster than before and the hoops started shaking around violently.

Jirou almost hit himself over the head with his racket in attempt to wake himself up.

"This isn't tennis!" said Shishido, sounding so offended.

"What are you talking about?" said some random man who happened to be standing next to Shishido and overheard his heinous comment and decided he was allowed to invade the conversation. "Of course this is tennis! This has been tennis since the reform in 2255!"

"They changed tennis into an all out brawl?" Choutarou gasped.

"It's not a brawl!" said the man. "It's the most physically demanding sport in the world!"

"It just continues like this endlessly?" Shishido demanded.

"No," said the man. "When one player gets fifteen points, play stops and the court is cleaned. Then it starts again until either the other player gets fifteen points or until the first player gets thirty."

"That makes no sense!" said Shishido even though it made more sense than the normal scoring in tennis.

"Why did you two enter a tennis competition if you don't even know how to play tennis?" said the man.

"WE KNOW HOW TO PLAY TENNIS!" Choutarou and Shishido yelled angrily as they punted the man off into the distance.

The referee suddenly blew his whistle as Zanzabar's points became 15. Jirou only had 1 point.

Several people came out and pushed all the fallen tennis balls aside as the referee told them to get ready for another round.

"Advantage to Player Number Eight!" said the referee as he handed Zanzabar a shield. "Congratulations on acquiring the Shield of Eternity!"

"What?" said Jirou, looking SO confused as Zanzabar held it up and light shone from it.

Choutarou picked up a booklet that outlined the rules of tennis. "So the Shield of Eternity was established in 2286 in order to reward the winner of the first round." He read.

"This is ridiculous." Said Shishido. "This is not tennis. Jirou! Come on, we're out of here."

"But I want to play!" Jirou whined.

"TENNIS!" shouted the referee, blowing his whistle as the cannons emerged from the courts again and started firing tennis balls around.

Jirou figured that by now he had figured out the basic rules of this retarded new tennis, so he started hitting the balls towards the hoops. He got a few baskets, but Zanzabar was blocking most of his shots with the Shield of Eternity. Once Jirou got into a groove, Zanzabar started to read his style, which is exactly what he wanted. Just as Zanzabar started to predict where Jirou would go next, Jirou changed it all up and fired a tennis ball off in a random direction.

"He's got him on the defensive!" Choutarou said. "Shishido, even though this isn't really tennis, you have to admit it's a pretty interesting game."

"Why do they have to call it tennis though?" Shishido said, still looking disgruntled because he knew Choutarou was right.

Jirou ran forward to hit another ball, but he stepped on a part of the court that suddenly sank into the ground, which caused him to fall off balance.

"ZONE BATTLE!" screamed the people.

"What?" said Jirou, looking around, and then up to see that the net had disappeared into the ground and Zanzabar was standing in front of him. The tennis balls stopped firing momentarily as Zanzabar started to swing his racket AT JIROU. Jirou ducked and jumped and blocked frantically as the timer counted down from thirty. The crowd was going wild, with the exception of Choutarou and Shishido who were just like: "Um…no…"

"THREE, TWO, ONE!" shouted everyone as Zanzabar jumped back to his side and the netting went up again.

Jirou shook it off and tried to orient himself again.

Zanzabar shot a tennis ball at Jirou, but Jirou sent it right back at him and it knocked the Shield of Eternity out of his hand. Everyone in the crowd cheered as Zanzabar scrambled to get the shield back, but in the time, Jirou managed to attain his last basket.

"ROUND!" shouted the referee.

"YAY!" exclaimed Jirou as he threw his arms up in the air. He did it so enthusiastically that he accidentally threw the racket as well, and it landed on the ground with a thud.

Everyone gasped and ran away as fast as they could.

Jirou looked around confusedly just as random parts of the court started to explode like landmines. Chickens came running out of other compartments in the ground, and then men in motorcycles drove around the court and little gremlins tore apart the netting.

Jirou, Choutarou and Shishido decided that now would be the best time for a retreat, and they ran away as well.

"Well, the referee DID say to not throw the racket." Choutarou shrugged as Jirou pouted.


	90. The Apocalypse

Channel 90- The Apocalypse  
Ryou, Atsushi, Kentarou

"JANE!" Kentarou screamed as he gallivanted over to a poor unfortunate soul who happened to bear a striking resemblance to Shishido. After coming very close to molesting this individual, Ryou and Atsushi sprinted over and pried him away.

They hastily explained the ridiculous and impossible situation to the frightened teen, and he ran off, hopefully never to see them again.

"Why did WE have to get stuck with him?" demanded Ryou.

"Because he's on YOUR team, and people automatically associate him with YOU." Atsushi reminded him.

"Yeah well that's a stupid reason," Ryou decided.

Atsushi agreed and the two of them stood there like morons for a few seconds before they realized that Kentarou was nowhere in sight.

After flipping out for a few seconds, they finally decided it might be best if they did something proactive about finding him. They wished they had made detective skillz or ninja skillz, but unfortunately they were only gang leaders and all they could do was sing, dance and express their rebellion through artistic graffiti.

Speaking of singing and dancing, it has been a while since "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" hasn't it? If you didn't download the song the first two times then here's your last chance.

They searched wildly and madly around the crazy town, and right in the middle of their desperate search, a random man who could only be described as a "walking billboard" jumped out of a bush with pamphlets in his hands.

"THE END IS NEAR!" he shouted as he practically threw the pamphlets at the twins. Then he screamed in terror.

Ryou and Atsushi were slightly disoriented as they took the pamphlets in vain hope that the man would leave them alone. But no. The man was not done with his speech.

"Every day the dome that surrounds us gets smaller and smaller and smaller!" the man yelled. "It's only a matter of time before it crushes us all!"

"Look," said Ryou. "People have been saying, the end is near, for like…"

He looked at Atsushi for confirmation.

Atsushi shrugged. "Well, over five hundred years at least," Atsushi said. "Unless people were saying that before our time, of course."

"There you see?" said Ryou to the man. "I don't think the world is going to end any time soon."

The man only let out another blood curdling scream and sprinted away.

"Some people just won't listen to reason." Atsushi said, shaking his head.

"Kind of like YOU." Said Ryou.

Atsushi clenched his fist angrily. "Did you HAVE to say that?"

"I saw the opportunity." Said Ryou. "And even though we're on mildly good terms right now comparatively speaking, I couldn't pass up on an opportunity to one up you."

"Do you realize how ludicrous that sounds?" Atsushi began, but Ryou didn't have an opportunity to follow up with an affirmative statement because Kentarou suddenly ran by, prompting yet another chase scene.

They even got an opportunity to go through a hallway of doors, except this time it made a little more sense because it wasn't in the middle of a jungle. However, they had to stop when they were out of breath and Kentarou was nowhere in sight.

"This is too much!" said Ryou. "We're supposed to be looking for Akutsu and instead we're just chasing Kentarou around like a couple of idiots!"

"I hope everyone else is having such lousy luck." Said Atsushi as he and Ryou sat down on a bench. And after a moment of sitting there, they realized that the bench had a sign that said, "WET PAINT".

Instead of doing anything about it, they just looked at each other and whimpered.

Two girls were walking by and the twins managed to hear a bit of their conversation:

"Did you see the kid running around in a loin cloth?"

"Yes, I thought I saw him heading towards the tallest building in the city!"

That was really all they had to listen to. They were thankful that, despite all their terrible luck up that point, they would happen to overhear two lines of a conversation that would tell them exactly where they had to go.

Unfortunately, they did not know where the tallest building in the city was.

"There's a LOT of tall buildings in this city…" Atsushi said, looking up.

They were both looking around, not caring that they had white stripes on their backs.

"Hang on…" Ryou pulled one of the end of the world pamphlets out of his pocket. "It says right here on the front that the dome is going to start scraping the top of the tallest building of the city in only a matter of years!"

"Great, so which building is it?" Atsushi said.

Ryou flipped the pamphlet open, and they were faced with a giant building pictured as if its top would scrape the dome.

"Look around it…" Atsushi said. "Try to find something recognizable!"

Ryou and Atsushi both did just that, and then they took a moment to look around them instead. They noticed that most of the people in the city seemed to be running toward a single point.

""Where are they going?" Ryou pondered.

"How am I supposed to know?" Atsushi said as he grabbed someone who was running by, who JUST SO HAPPENED to be the crazy billboard man who had given them the pamphlet and predicted the disaster.

"Where are you all going?" Ryou asked him.

"It's the Apocalypse!" the man screamed. "RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"

They let him go and then grabbed the NEXT person who happened to be running by.

"Where are you all going?" Ryou repeated.

"Some strange boy in a loin cloth is—" started the man, but Atsushi stopped him.

"That's all we needed to hear." He said, and they let the man run off.

"Let's just follow everyone else." Said Ryou. "We're BOUND to come across him!"

"That's what I was going to say." Atsushi glared at him.

They both followed the crowd (yes, yes, I know you should mostly follow your instincts and avoid being a follower of the crowd, but in this particular instance, I think it would be best if they just went with the flow) and eventually came to a stop when they could not go any further.

The streets were so saturated with people that they couldn't even see over the sea of heads. And, mind you, while Ryou and Atsushi aren't ridiculously short, they are also not ridiculously tall either.

"I can't see ANYTHING!" complained Ryou.

"I'll tell you what I CAN see," Atsushi held up the pamphlet and pointed to the giant building that all the people were staring at.

"Let me get on your shoulders." Ryou ordered.

"Why do YOU get to be on MY shoulders?" Atsushi demanded.

"Because I said it first!" Ryou answered.

"Oh yeah." Atsushi nodded since the logic made sense. Ryou climbed up on Atsushi's shoulders and scanned the crowd in search of any sign of Kentarou…

And then he saw him.

"He's climbing the side of the building!" Ryou reported as he jumped down.

"WHAT?" Atsushi said in a tone of disbelief.

"I know." Said Ryou. "He's pulling a King Kong! No doubt he has an innocent yet beautiful blonde woman with him…"

"But how are we going to get there?" Atsushi said. "It'll take forever to work our way through all these people."

They both looked through the crowd and started pondering when suddenly they felt a tap on their individual backs.

Whence they turned, they were surprised to see one of the last people they expected.

"Why…hello…Kentarou…?" Ryou was confused as he peered at Kentarou curiously. Kentarou was wearing normal clothes and he wasn't bounding around like a fool and, most importantly of all, he was not in the midst of climbing the tallest building in the city.

"Hello," said Kentarou as if he didn't owe anyone an explanation as to why he wasn't doing the aforementioned actions. Ryou and Atsushi were even more taken aback after he spoke.

"Care to explain?" offered Atsushi since Kentarou wasn't about to do it on his own.

"Oh right," said Kentarou. "Well, I was picked up by some futuristic psychiatrists who brought me to their clinic and rehabilitated me in the past half an hour."

"Oh." Said Ryou and Atsushi.

"Gotta love the future, huh?" said Kentarou enthusiastically.

"Right…" said Atsushi. "But…if you're standing right there, then who is the person in the loin cloth scaling the building?"

The trio looked over at the building one more time, then back at each other. They shrugged and as quietly and inconspicuously as possible, slinked away from the scene.


	91. Steroids

Channel 91- Steroids  
Momo, Kaidou, Taka

"This credit business is outrageous!" Momo declared as he, Kaidou and Taka entered a store. It sure is lucky that Taka's horse has the ability to disappear and reappear whenever he is needed versus whenever he would be cumbersome to have around. ONWARD!

"I agree, but it must work for the future if that's what they use for EVERYTHING…" Taka said. "Besides, it reinforces doing good deeds and eliminates currency, which is the root of all evil."

Momo and Kaidou had a Golden Pair SYNCHRO moment because they both raised their eyebrows at Taka who sighed and looked dejected.

"We spent all that time applying for credits and we can't even buy any of this stuff with the free credits they gave us." Kaidou observed as he picked something up off the shelves.

"What is that?" Momo leaned over Kaidou's shoulder. "Super Pills?"

"A diet pill?" Taka suggested.

Kaidou wasn't reading the label fast enough for Momo's liking, so Momo took it from him and read the back.

"Unleash your inner Super Hero!" Momo announced.

The three looked at each other.

"Is this for real?" Momo said, checking for a candid camera.

"Look, here's something else," Taka said. "One wish granted…guaranteed!"

He turned it over and looked at the back.

"Oh, one TRIVIAL wish granted." He corrected himself.

"Who cares?" said Momo. "One wish? Super hero pills? What else is here?"

They started frantically searching the shelves.

"No wonder Akutsu didn't want to leave this Universe." Kaidou sighed as he picked up a bottle of pills that were labeled, See Your Own Future!

They stealthily peeked over the top of the shelves. And, even though we do not endorse stealing…

On second thought, we refuse to promote stealing! Taka, Momo and Kaidou went out and performed a few good deeds so they accumulated enough credits to pay for the items they desired.

After they purchased their three new bottles of steroid-like substances, they went out into the streets and marveled at their beauty.

"Hang on, this superhero one says it's one time a year use only!" Momo sounded offended.

"Same here," Kaidou agreed, holding up the future viewing ones.

Taka nodded and sighed. "We shouldn't have wasted our credits!"

"Think about it," said Momo. "It's not like we're going to be in this Universe very long. We'll just use these pills to find Akutsu so we can go home." He popped open the top of the Super Hero pills. "Maybe one of us will have a power that's useful for finding Akutsu!"

"Good thinking!" said Taka as Momo handed them each a pill.

Then they realized they didn't have any water so they went off and got some water since they were too wussy to take the pills dry. THEN they each took the pill and waited for something to happen.

"Let me see the instructions," Kaidou took the bottle from Momo. He opened a piece of paper that was inside the bottle. "It says here that the powers only last for an hour to prevent criminals from using their powers for evil."

"Hey, it also says which powers are most common!" Taka said excitedly. "Speed, strength and communication are the most common. Elementals, telekinesis and projectiles are less common. Defensive powers like healing and force fields are the most uncommon!"

"That doesn't help us figure out what we are though." Kaidou pointed out.

"Well, I don't care how common each of them are!" said Momo. "I've the strength one for sure!"

He turned around and grabbed a mailbox, uprooting it from the sidewalk with great ease. He cheered on the inside when his hunch was correct, and both Taka and Kaidou frowned at him for being so appeased.

"I just want something that's useful in finding Akutsu," Taka said. Then he noticed he felt something strange on his arm and looked down to see that it was on fire. He put the hand out while Momo and Kaidou stared at him.

"Hm…" they observed.

"That's not particularly helpful in finding Akutsu," Taka pouted. "But somehow, it was entirely expected."

So Kaidou tried to figure out what power HE had by doing various foolish actions. After a while, he finally established that he had the power to heal people. The other two made fun of him for a little while before getting over it. After they had fully gotten the hang of their powers, they ran around and wrecked havoc with them, having fun rescuing kitties from trees, lighting things on fire and curing cancer.

Then, suddenly, all their powers ceased to be.

"Aww…" they said when they realized the hour must be up.

"Good thing we searched for Akutsu while we had super powers." Said Momo even though it wasn't true and the others knew it but they were going to agree with him anyway just so they felt better about themselves.

"What should we try now?" Taka asked. "Looking into our futures and hopefully spotting Akutsu somewhere in there?"

"That seems like it might be fun…" Momo rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"All right, this time let's read the directions FIRST." Said Kaidou as he took out the paper. "Most people see their immediate future. Some people might see five years in the future, and very few people will end up seeing up to ten years in the future."

"So it's another rarity thing." Taka decided with a shrug.

They took out their water that they had been carrying around and each took a future pill.

Kaidou was the first to feel something. He found himself still standing in the future Universe, but it looked all funky and swiggly like he was in a dream world. He noticed he was holding a puppy for some reason, and took a few steps forward and looked down to see a banana peel on the ground, and that he had almost stepped on it.

Momo was next. He was standing in what looked like their regular Universe, which made him relieved because he knew now that they were at least going to make it back. (Or he was going to anyway!) He looked down at himself to see that he was taller, and thankfully he was standing on a tennis court playing… HIGH SCHOOL TENNIS. OMFG.

Taka was last and was afraid, at first, that he wasn't going to see anything. He was standing in the middle of his very own Sushi restaurant and had many many customers. His eyes glittered with excitement and he would have most certainly run off to make Sushi for his customers had he not suddenly come to the realization that he was back with Momo and Kaidou in the Future Universe.

"I think…I saw my immediate future…" Kaidou reported, looking down to see that he was no longer holding the puppy.

"I saw myself in high school!" said Momo. "I was playing tennis!"

"I wasn't playing tennis, but I think I saw myself ten years from now in my Sushi restaurant!" said Taka. "And I was successful."

They all slapped each other five.

"Oh wait, did anybody see anything about Akutsu?" Taka asked.

"No…" said Kaidou, shaking his head.

"Well, I was back in our original Universe so at least we know someone eventually finds him." Momo shrugged.

"All right, then I guess we should use our wish pills to wish for him to be here." Taka suggested.

The other two slapped their foreheads and wondered WHY DIDN'T WE THINK OF THAT?

"What do we do?" Momo asked. "Just take one of the pills and say, I wish yadda yadda yadda?"

"All right it says here…" Taka read the paper inside. "That we take the pill and our secret inner wish comes true."

They looked at each other awkwardly.

"So we don't have control over what appears?" Kaidou said.

"Yeah, I guess so." Taka said. "So let's all think really really hard about wanting Akutsu here, and one of us is bound to get it!"

"All right," they resolved as they took their pills and then waited. The first thing that everyone noticed was that Momo's clothes suddenly changed dramatically; he was wearing all black and had a mask and was carrying num-chucks.

"Sweet!" he cheered. "I'm a ninja!"

The other two stared at him.

"That's your secret wish?" Kaidou said, looking almost disgusted.

"Yeah, so?" Momo glared at Kaidou.

Before Kaidou could say anything, a puppy that looked strangely familiar (like the one he saw in his FUTURE!!!) appeared in his arms. So Momo and Taka enjoyed a good chuckle at that, but of course they were sad that Akutsu hadn't appeared instead.

So it was all up to Taka. However, instead of Akutsu appearing next to him, his own lovely horse, Horse, appeared. And then, next to Horse, a SECOND horse appeared. It was a girl horse. You could tell. It was pink. Yes, the horse was pink.

"Um…your secret desire is that your horse could have a girlfriend?" Momo said.

"Well, he recently got rejected so my subconscious just wanted him to be happy I guess…" Taka suggested as the two horses started nuzzling. They had instant chemistry.

"Well, it's a good thing we wasted our time and our credits." Kaidou said.

"At least I'm a ninja now." Momo said.

"I thought there was a never ending war between ninjas and pirates." Taka pointed out.

"Yeah well…now I'm BOTH of them!" Momo announced.

"Looks like we're just going to have to look for Akutsu the old fashion way." Kaidou said as he took a step forward.

But he stopped before his foot touched the ground. He looked down to see a banana peel.

Cautiously, he stepped around it.


	92. Perfect Teams

Channel 92- Perfect Teams  
Oshitari, Gakuto and Hiyoshi

"I can think of a bunch of things that we should probably be doing instead of this." said Hiyoshi as he followed Oshitari around an intense video arcade.

Oshitari looked back at Hiyoshi.

"I agree," he said. "But Gakuto went in here, and therefore we have to find him."

"Can't we just abandon him and meet up with him at the end of the day?" Hiyoshi asked.

Oshitari wasn't even going to dignify that question with an answer.

"There you are, Gakuto," said Oshitari, shaking his head with disbelief as he found Gakuto at a random shooting fighting and killing game. He was very enthusiastic and into it, and when Oshitari walked over, he quickly put the gun down and tried to look as though he hadn't been playing video games.

"Oh hey guys!" he said. "Um…long time no see?"

"Why did you take off?" Oshitari crossed his arms and acted like he was speaking to a child.

"Well I thought I saw Akutsu go in here and I wanted to hurry up and follow him before we lost him and I figured we could meet up after I found him…"

"Actually, Gakuto, I don't think Akutsu went in here." Oshitari said.

"I THOUGHT he did…" Gakuto lowered his head in shame.

"Even if he DID, why were you just playing video games?" Hiyoshi asked quizzically.

"Um…" Gakuto said.

And he didn't really say anything else because there was nothing he COULD say in response.

"Come on, we have to go and find Akutsu…" said Oshitari.

They were just about to leave when they saw the most amazing video game on the planet. It was virtual reality. And, this being the future and everything, they figured that the virtual realty game would kick ass.

So they decided to put their search for Akutsu on hold and get suited up to do some virtual killing.

"Teams of two?" said the man who was in charge as they put on their helmets and clothing required for shooting and killing.

"The two of us will be a team!" said Gakuto immediately, pointing to himself and Oshitari.

"What about me?" complained Hiyoshi.

"It was your fault for being in a group with us." Gakuto said.

"You guys forced me to be in a group with you!" said Hiyoshi.

"Would you have rather gone with Shishido and Ootori?" Oshitari pointed out.

Oshitari had made a pretty good argument, so they waited for someone random to come over and team up with Hiyoshi. Sure enough, someone eventually did, and for the sake of everyone's sanity, let's say he introduced himself as Buddy.

"All right, go ahead!" said the man as he pressed a button.

Instantly, the scenery around them fizzled out and they were standing in a realistic war zone. In fact, it was so realistic that they could practically smell the burning flesh and feel the weight of the guns they were carrying.

Thankfully, the two teams hadn't appeared right next to each other or else there might have been some pretty quick deaths right then and there. Gakuto and Oshitari got behind a wall of sandbags and looked at each other.

"We'll definitely win!" said Gakuto. "We play doubles in tennis so we'll have better natural communication with each other than Hiyoshi and that random man!"

"Yes…" Oshitari said. "Unfortunately, Hiyoshi knows everything about you and me and our styles, so he may be able to anticipate our moves. We know about Hiyoshi, but there's no telling what we can expect from this 'Buddy' fellow."

"He's probably stupid." Gakuto decided right then and there.

Meanwhile, Buddy and Hiyoshi were talking strategy.

Actually, Buddy was talking strategy. Hiyoshi was just sort of staring at him and waiting for him to take the game LESS SERIOUSLY. Buddy seemed to realize Hiyoshi's lack of enthusiasm after about ten seconds, and so he grabbed Hiyoshi's shoulders and started to shake him.

"THIS IS NO LAUGHING MATTER, MAN!" he shouted. "THIS IS LIFE AND DEATH!"

"Relax," Hiyoshi suggested, pushing Buddy away. "It's only virtual reality."

"No it's not." Said Buddy. "This is real killing and shooting and dying."

Hiyoshi waited for Buddy to follow up with JK NOT REALLY! But no. Buddy looked very stone faced as Hiyoshi finally grasped the situation.

"This isn't virtual reality." He finally established.

"Right." Said Buddy. "What did you think you were signing up for?"

Hiyoshi looked at Buddy like he was stupid. "OBVIOUSLY I thought I was signing up for virtual reality." He pointed out.

"Oh right…" said Buddy. "Well, that being said, let's go murder some people!"

Hiyoshi just kind of sat there like: Um… no. But then he realized that even if it was real killing for Buddy, everything was going to reset when he went to the next Universe so it didn't really matter if he killed Oshitari and Gakuto. Though he would feel a little bad. It's not like Hiyoshi has killed anyone yet. There's a first time for everything, though.

Meanwhile, with the pair that is affectionately considered 'Dirty' for unknown reasons…(or maybe such reasons are known, but we would all prefer to keep them in the back of our minds instead of bringing them forth.)

Gakuto used his ninja abilities to roll behind an overturned truck that was aflame, and then gestured for Oshitari to follow him.

Oshitari didn't bother rolling. He just stood up and walked over to the aflame overturned truck and stood next to Gakuto, waiting for him to stand up.

"Why aren't you getting into this?" Gakuto demanded.

"What I want to know is why you thought that hiding behind this overturned truck that is still on fire would be better than hiding behind those sandbags that are NOT on fire?" Oshitari questioned.

Gakuto looked back at the sandbags. "Because the sandbags are an obvious hiding spot," he said. "Most people wouldn't think to look behind the overturned truck that is on fire. They'd figure that anyone would be crazy to hide there."

"I see." Oshitari rolled his eyes.

"And, if you continue to think about it…" Gakuto went on. "While they're looking in the sandbags hiding spot, we have perfect view and opportunity to shoot them in the back!"

"Brilliant, Gakuto." Said Oshitari. "In the meantime, this truck is about to explode, and therefore we should put some distance between us and it."

Oshitari grabbed Gakuto by the arm, made a couple of strides and then dove to the ground just as the truck exploded and shot about a million miles (give or take) into the air. After it landed with a crash, Gakuto sat up and looked at Oshitari.

"How did you know that would happen?" he demanded.

"As a detective, it's my specialty to always escape explosions at the last seconds by making a few steps and then diving to the ground." Oshitari stood up and adjusted his clothing.

"We really ARE the perfect team!" Gakuto announced.

"How so?" Oshitari raised an eyebrow. "You put our lives in danger and rescue us before any real damage is done?"

"Well no I was actually thinking—" Gakuto started angrily but then he stopped when he heard gunfire. He started jumping around and doing Matrix dodges as Oshitari just stood there and acted like no one was shooting at him. Casually, Oshitari turned around and pointed the gun in the direction where the shots were coming from and took a few shots, and promptly the firing ceased.

Gakuto was out of breath as he dove behind the sandbags and Oshitari joined him.

"AND you can't be shot," Gakuto remembered.

"Only if it's not dramatic enough." Oshitari corrected.

"I'll be careful not to make a dramatic situation!" Gakuto said.

Meanwhile, Buddy and Hiyoshi were hiding behind their own set of sandbags because such a hiding spot always seems to be abundantly available.

"That team that shot at them was foolish!" Buddy announced.

"How so?" said Hiyoshi. "They were standing out in the open like idiots in the middle of a war zone and the other team had the opportunity."

"They didn't take into account the dodging and shooting abilities of their opponents!" Buddy explained as if he was an expert. You could tell he was one of those guys whose life is dedicated to single thing such as crazy reality killing games because he acted as though no one knew more about the topic than he did, and if someone did something stupid then he knew exactly how to explain it and say how he would have done it better.

"So how would YOU have done it better?" Hiyoshi offered.

"I would have used an GRENADE!" said Buddy. "There's no way anyone can dodge THAT!"

"Oshitari can." Hiyoshi sighed.

"What was that?" demanded Buddy.

"Never mind." Said Hiyoshi.

Buddy picked a grenade out of his pocket and ripped the pin out with his teeth. "GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!" he shouted as if it made any sense as he jumped out from behind the sandbags and hurled the grenade at Oshitari and Gakuto.

Gakuto dove out of the way, but because of Buddy's intensely dramatic scream (even if it made no sense) it instantly became dramatic enough for Oshitari to die. Even though he dove out of the way and avoided the blast as well, he writhed on the ground and Gakuto soon discovered that he was suffering from a fatal bullet wound.

"YUUSHI!" Gakuto shook his fists angrily at the heavens. "NOOOOOOO!"

Hiyoshi got out from behind the sandbags as Buddy did a victory dance. Then Hiyoshi shot Buddy in the back because he was annoying, and then went over to Gakuto who was still mourning.

"Chill out, it's only fake deaths." Hiyoshi pointed out.

"Oh right!" said Gakuto. "AND it's virtual reality!"

"Actually it's real reality." Hiyoshi admitted.

"Then…NOOOOO!" Gakuto yelled again.

The virtual reality session suddenly ended and they found themselves standing back in the video arcade. Oshitari sat up as if nothing had happened, and Gakuto hugged him, and Buddy ran over to Hiyoshi and bitch slapped him.

"How dare you murder me!" said Buddy.

"Hey, I thought you said it was REAL killing." Said Hiyoshi, trying not to sound TOO disappointed.

"I JUST WANTED MY LIFE TO HAVE MORE MEANING!" screamed Buddy as he ran away crying.

Hiyoshi shrugged at the Dirty Pair who were like: All righty then…

"So we should probably go look for Akutsu now." Oshitari suggested.

"Yeah, probably." Gakuto agreed.

And with that, Gakuto, Oshitari and Hiyoshi frolicked off to locate the elusive one.


	93. Conductor

Channel 93- Conductor  
Eiji, Oishi, Ryoma

Ryoma didn't like being in a group with The Golden Pair. It's not that he didn't like Eiji and Oishi, but when they were together they tended to like… not really pay attention to anyone/anything else. Ryoma knew it wasn't INTENTIONAL, but it was annoying.

So he decided to make himself feel better by assuring himself that they both had a lot they had to work on, and he was so much better at tennis than both of them combined. In fact, Ryoma speculated that if he were playing in a game against the Golden Pair, as in RYOMA versus THEM, then he might just win. After all, they didn't exactly have the best record as of yet. Such is life.

"Ryoma, why are you walking so far behind us?" Eiji asked as he grabbed Ryoma's arm and pulled him forward.

Of course, Eiji had forgotten Ryoma's current state of utmost retardedness, so this caused Ryoma to fall flat on his face.

Oishi gasped since he's just that way, and Eiji started to angst. Eiji has three modes; Cheerful, Angsty and Bitchy. Right now, he's angsty.

"I'm sorry!" Eiji explained. "It's all my fault! I shouldn't have been so mean!"

"It's all right…" said Ryoma as he stood up, but slipped on the floor that happened to have just been waxed and fell over again.

This caused Eiji to angst even more, and Oishi to gasp again. Unfortunately, neither of them did anything to assist Ryoma, so maybe it was all an act and they were secretly enjoying Ryoma's suffering?

When Ryoma finally got to his feet, they decided to actually start searching for Akutsu instead of walking around in the mall. Yes, they had applied for credits and yes, they had performed many good deeds (come on…with OISHI in the group, they would have performed good deeds anyway) so their credits accumulated quickly.

First they went into some kind of futuristic department store where there were ladies stationed around with perfumes and were squirting them at any innocent person who might be walking by.

"Guaranteed to make you look and feel ten years younger!" called a woman as she stood at a table with soap products. "Free samples! Free samples!"

"I can't believe they still have these ridiculous things in the future." Said Ryoma as he tripped on ABSOLUTELY NOTHING and tumbled into the table, causing all the soaps to explode all over him and the woman to only leap away and stand there to do nothing to help. It's all right, it's not like anyone was helping either.

"Oh no!" said the woman. "This is horrible!"

"How is it horrible other than Ryoma has just made a fool of himself AGAIN?" Oishi asked.

"Children aren't supposed to use the products." The woman said as she pointed to where Ryoma used to be. Instead, there was a toddler of about two sitting in Ryoma's clothes.

"AHHH!" screamed Eiji as he fainted.

Oishi caught him and looked back to the woman. "Why did that happen?" he asked.

"Our products are GUARANTEED." The woman said, pointing to her sign. "It made him ten years younger."

"How long will it last?" said Eiji as he regained consciousness faster than even he normally does.

"About an hour or so." The woman shrugged. "It's only a free sample. Are you interested?"

"NO!" they both yelled at her.

So after they collected Ryoma from the mess, they stood there and wondered exactly what they were going to do next.

"We just have to take care of him until he turns back to normal!" Eiji exclaimed. "I can be the Daddy and you can be the Mommy."

"Why do I have to be the Mom?" said Oishi.

Eiji just stood there and didn't say anything.

"Right, right, I know…" Oishi said finally.

"Yeah, I just wasn't going to say anything." Eiji said.

"I know." Oishi said.

"Cause you told me to stop bringing up the fact that you're a girl." Eiji went on even though he should have just stopped.

"I KNOW." Oishi raised his voice slightly, but it caused Ryoma to start crying since Oishi happened to be the one holding him at the time.

"There, there, baby Ryoma!" said Eiji as he took him away from Oishi and started caressing him. "Daddy Eiji is here to take care of you!"

"I think we should probably find something in this place that could turn him back to normal." Said Oishi rationally.

"What person in their right mind would sell something that would make you look and feel ten years OLDER?" Eiji demanded as if Oishi had just suggested a horrible injustice.

"That's a good point, Eiji," Oishi said as he took Ryoma from Eiji and proceeded to cradle away his tears. "Besides, it's only an hour. I'm sure we can deal with him for only an hour."

Ryoma stopped crying within only a few seconds and Eiji squealed with delight.

"Oishi, you'll make a really good mom someday!" Eiji exclaimed.

Oishi gave Eiji a chilling stare.

"I mean…dad!" Eiji quickly corrected himself. "It's just that… you know… with you as you are… for just right now and everything…"

"Eiji, PLEASE stop bringing it up." Oishi said. "I don't know how many times I've already asked you."

"Probably over twenty." Eiji said, looking ashamed. But then he smiled. "But look on the bright side! No girl can ever accuse you of not understanding!"

Oishi slapped his forehead, but couldn't help but forgive Eiji.

So the Golden Pair made up after that, OF COURSE, and thus they decided to frolic around with Ryoma as a small child. But then they happened to notice that his clothes didn't fit him so they hung out in the baby section and found him overalls and a train conductor hat that he could wear. And they got him a binky. They also bought a bear suit for him just in case he got cold. And since they couldn't resist, they put him in the bear suit too, and put the train conductor hat on OVER the bear suit.

Needless to say, Ryoma looked pretty ridiculous but they didn't care. They made sure to get as many people as possible to see how precious he was.

It was all fun and games until some random middle aged woman walked up to them.

"That's disgusting!" she shouted.

Then she turned up her nose and walked away.

Eiji and Oishi looked at each other.

"What's disgusting?" Eiji asked.

"I don't know." Oishi answered.

They checked behind them and then chased after the lady to find out what was so disgusting that made her rudely walk over to them and scream it in their faces.

"How old are you?" the woman asked Oishi.

"I'm in ninth grade." Oishi answered.

"Me too!" said Eiji proudly.

"Well then it's even MORE disgusting!" announced the woman. "I was hoping you were AT LEAST sixteen!"

With her work done, she departed.

Oishi and Eiji looked at each other quizzically until Oishi finally put two and two together.

"Oh no…" Oishi said. "That lady thought…oh no…"

"What?" said Eiji.

"Everyone's been thinking it this whole time!" Oishi exclaimed. "She was just the only one who was rude and opinionated enough to say anything!"

"Thinking WHAT?" Eiji said persistently.

"They think that Ryoma is OUR CHILD!" Oishi said despairingly.

"Well that makes no sense!" said Eiji. "He doesn't even look like either of us at all!"

"That's not the issue, Eiji." Said Oishi. "Now I feel dirty and violated."

"They wouldn't have thought this if you were a boy." Said Eiji. "They would have just thought that we were babysitting him."

"It's not my fault." Said Oishi. "And stop bringing it up!"

"So what do we do?" Eiji asked with a flamboyant shrug.

"We're going to hide in the corner somewhere until Ryoma turns back to normal!" Oishi declared. Then he spotted a dressing room out of the corner of his eye and pulled Eiji into it, locking the door behind him.

The two of them stood there awkwardly and drummed their fingers on the wall as Ryoma squirmed impatiently.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door.

"One minute!" Oishi and Eiji said at the same time. Then they gasped at each other for speaking, and then they threw their hands over each other's mouths. ALL IN SYNCHRO.

The door flung open so dramatically and intensely that it almost fell off its hinges. The annoying woman who had cursed them before was standing there.

"You two are absolutely disgusting!" she practically shrieked.

"That's not it at all!" Eiji tried to argue.

"Out of there at once!" the lady who was probably named Rosalie yelled. She pulled Oishi and Eiji out of the dressing room and picked Ryoma up. "You two are CLEARLY unfit to parent this child!"

"We're not parenting him!" Oishi attempted to explain.

"That is certainly obvious!" said Rosalie. "Your behavior is entirely inappropriate! I am going to take this child someplace where he can be cared for!"

With that, Rosalie started marching off.

"Wait!" Eiji called.

"Hang on, Eiji." Oishi pointed at the clock.

"Oh." Eiji nodded.

They waited a second or two and then Ryoma suddenly became normal aged and normal sized. And, for the sake of avoiding grossness and awkwardness, we'll say that the baby clothes he was wearing were SUPER FUTURE BABY CLOTHES so they expanded in order to fit him. So not only did they not explode off his body, but normal sized Ryoma was still wearing a bear suit AND a conductor hat AND a binky.

Rosalie screamed dramatically and dropped Ryoma, sprinting away as fast as she could.

Ryoma sat there in disbelief for a couple of seconds before spitting out the binky as Eiji and Oishi hurried over.

They started to explain, but Ryoma put his hand up to stop them.

"I don't even want to know." He said.


	94. Tachibana IS GOD

Channel 94- Tachibana IS GOD  
Tachibana, Kamio, Shinji

Fudomine was happy; but not as happy as they COULD be. They enjoyed being with each other but were unsatisfied with the fact that the rest of their team wasn't in their company. After all, I don't think there's a single team in the world that is more obsessed with each other's success and company than Fudomine. Except for maybe Rokkaku, but that could just be because they all enjoy 'sea activities'.

Tachibana's initial idea was to look up their family's names and search for their relatives. Of course everyone agreed but they didn't know where they were going to find a phone book or anything considering this was THE FUTURE. So, instead, they decided to just keep their eyes peeled for anyone who looked like them. Of course, this method is quite flawed considering after five hundred years the blood is likely to get diluted and therefore they would not look anything like their kin. AT ALL.

As a matter of fact, they passed by a few emo people (unfortunately they still exist in the future) and mistook them for perhaps Kamio's relatives but were thus far unsuccessful and only managed to frighten the emos and make them cry.

"Well, I think that instead of looking for our relatives, we should maybe look for Akutsu…" Tachibana established after they had wasted a good hour doing nothing productive.

"Oh right." Said Tachibana's lackeys.

They continued to walk as they made a mental picture of Akutsu in their minds, but just as Shinji and Kamio were about to call out to Tachibana and warn him about the calamity that he was about to face, Tachibana tumbled down a manhole into the sewers.

Kamio and Shinji didn't even bother hesitating. They dove head first into the manhole as well, screaming Tachibana's name.

They went a lot further than they expected to and sort of regretting diving head first. There was a river of slime and grunge ahead of them, and they watched as Tachibana splashed into it. They braced themselves and joined him, creating quite the mighty splash.

When they resurfaced, they whined about their current situation and then they swam to edge.

"How do we get out of here, Tachibana?" Kamio said as he tried to wipe some of the sewer slime off of his face.

"There's got to be some kind of ladder around here somewhere," Tachibana reasoned. "Come on, I'm sure if we start walking we'll find something."

Needless to say, Shinji and Kamio agreed with Tachibana and allowed him to lead the way. Of course, Tachibana could have responded with, "Don't know. WALK," and it's likely Shinji and Kamio would have followed his direction anyway just because he is Tachibana. But you knew that.

They did not find a ladder, however. As they turned the corner, they were instead faced with an entire underground city made entirely out of garbage and various things that may have fallen into the sewer. They WOULD have marveled at its beauty but it was made of garbage, so they instead just marveled at the fact that it existed, and then were sort of tempted to turn around and go the other way.

"Who goes there?" demanded a voice from nowhere.

Shinji and Kamio latched onto each of Tachibana's arms as he whirled around to protect them with his Super Saiyan powers. Just as he turned, a being fizzled into existence right in front of him. Now, I say 'being' because it wasn't exactly a human. It was sort of a human shaped type thing, but it was clearly a mutant because it just wasn't the right colors and things were missing, and there were extra things.

Tachibana was so startled that he only managed to respond with: "…Um…!"

Kamio and Shinji, because of Tachibana's lack of ability to respond, only screamed like scared little girls.

"How dare you scream in response to my hideous appearance!" the mutant yelled angrily as he took a club out from behind his back and started swinging it wildly in the direction of poor Fudomine. They ducked and dodged and threw themselves to the floor in attempt to escape.

"Wait!" said Shinji. "I have a wand!"

He whipped out his wand and exclaimed, "Expelliarmus!"

(We did our homework about this particular spell and actually looked up how it is spelled so don't worry about double checking this time.)

The club flew out of the mutant's hand.

"Nice job, Shinji," said Tachibana as he pat Shinji on the shoulder, which almost caused him to faint but luckily he managed to stay conscious.

The action also caused Kamio to fume with enraged jealousy. "Oh yeah?" said Kamio. "Well I can do something too!"

Kamio then ran up to the mutant who was attempting to collect the club and booted him in the rear end with a kick that could have only come from someone who originated from THE SOCCER UNIVERSE! So is Kamio the Prince of Soccer? Or is it Kaidou? The world may never know.

The mutant skidded across the ground and just as they were all going to chase him and kick him while he was doing, they noticed that he had started to cry. That wasn't going to stop Kamio or Shinji from impressing Tachibana, however, so they continued to charge. Luckily, Tachibana cannot be won over so easily and grabbed both of them by the collar, holding them in place.

"What's wrong?" Tachibana asked the mutant.

"I was only doing my job!" cried the mutant. "I was protecting my family! Evil sewer monsters attack our mutant town from time to time, and we're defenseless!"

"How old are you?" Tachibana asked.

"Well…" started the mutant. "If I wasn't a mutant, then I'd probably be in about eighth grade!"

Tachibana's eyes lit up. He loved helping and inspiring people who are a year younger than him.

"Well, let me teach you how to defend yourself!" said Tachibana as he picked up the mutant's club for him.

"TACHIBANA!" shouted Kamio and Shinji dramatically. It was pretty easy to see that they were incredibly jealous.

"Don't worry," said Tachibana. "We're just going to help him out a bit.

Now, since Tachibana is essentially an equivalent to GOD in Fudomine's eyes, they allowed him to do whatever he wanted.

Tachibana gave the mutant Swinging a Club 101 in record breaking time. Don't ask why Tachibana knows how to do these kinds of things. Just rest assured that he is Tachibana, and if it's about the well being of people younger than him, he probably just learns it right away. It's like the Matrix where the info is downloaded to his brain and then he can magically perform the tasks. Tachibana is… THE ONE.

But anyway. Whether he is The One or not is the age old question, but that is not what is currently being debated.

"Thanks so much!" said the mutant as tears formed in his seventeen eyes. "I'll take this knowledge back to the city and teach them how to swing clubs effectively so we can fight against the sewer monsters!"

"That's great!" said Tachibana, filling with sunshine and joy.

"What can I do to repay you?" the mutant asked.

"We need a way out of here…" Tachibana admitted. "We have to get back to the surface because we're looking for someone."

"Oh…" said the mutant. "Well, if you want to get out of here, you were going the wrong way."

"I figured so much." Tachibana sighed.

"If you just head back in that direction, you should eventually find a ladder that leads to the surface!" said the mutant. With that, he waved off his companions. "Oh! And stay out of the slime and be careful of the sewer monsters!"

"Okay!" called Fudomine as they departed.

"See?" said Tachibana to his best friends. "It was a good thing we helped him. Now we know the way out AND we know that we have to stay out of the slime in order to avoid the sewer monsters."

"Didn't he say… stay out of the slime and be careful of the sewer monsters?" Shinji said.

"Yes…didn't I just say that?" Tachibana looked confused.

"Well, he never said that the sewer monsters were in the slime." Shinji pointed out.

"Be quiet!" said Kamio, slapping Shinji. "Tachibana has never steered us wrong before!"

"You're right…" Shinji bowed his head in shame.

"It's all right!" said Tachibana, patting Shinji on the back. "I forgive you."

So they continued their trek until they saw the manhole that they had fallen from. They figured they had to go even further in order to find the ladder so they did just that as well. After even MORE walking, they saw the ladder up ahead, but unfortunately they had to dive into the slime in order to reach the ladder.

They looked at each other nervously.

"Well, I'll go first." Tachibana said. "If something happens to me, I want you both to run back to the mutant city and get help."

"But…but…!" they both stuttered as Tachibana looked like he was going to dive into the slime.

"Wait!" said Shinji, as he grabbed Tachibana's arm.

"I have to do this!" Tachibana looked determined.

"I have a broom." Shinji held up his broom.

Tachibana stared at Shinji.

"Oh." He said.

They all climbed on the broom and started flying towards the ladder, when suddenly a giant mouth shot out of the slime. And it would have certainly swallowed them whole if not for the fact that Shinji was able to pull up at the last second.

"Why are we flying towards the ladder?" Kamio demanded. "Just fly up to the top!"

"Oh right." Said Shinji.

They started flying up away from the scary sewer monster, but as it turns out, there are several different types of sewer monsters. Just as they were almost at the opening, a flying sewer monster descended upon them and grabbed Tachibana right off the broom.

"TACHIBANA!" Shinji and Kamio yelled EVER so dramatically.

"Go on without me!" Tachibana ordered as he disappeared off down the sewers.

Kamio and Shinji usually listen to what Tachibana says, but when it comes to saving his life, they had to go against his orders.

"I could cast a spell on it so it drops Tachibana, but I have to steer," Shinji said to Kamio.

"Leave it to me!" said Kamio. "Fly above it!"

Shinji pulled up until they were right above the sewer monster. Kamio then leapt off the broom and descended right upon it, booting it in the rear. It was so surprised and caught off guard that it dropped Tachibana and went careening into the wall, where it promptly exploded into a fiery mushroom cloud. Shinji practically did a dive bomb as he shot down to collect Tachibana and Kamio before they landed right in the mouth of a swimming sewer monster.

When they were safely up in the air, they breathed many sighs of relief. Shinji flew up through the opening and to the surface where they took deep breaths and adjusted their clothing.

"All right." Said Tachibana. "Let's go find Akutsu now."

"Yes, Tachibana." Said Kamio and Shinji.


	95. One Question

Channel 95- One Question  
Fuji, Yuuta, Mizuki

"Well after that, I don't know if anything could possibly impress me." Said Mizuki as he, Yuuta and Fuji exited a building that said, "Aliens, Come Here to Learn Our Language!"

"Guaranteed in five minutes or less," Fuji read the flier they had picked up. He disposed of the flier in the trashcan because littering is for losers.

"Who would have ever thought it would actually work?" said Yuuta miraculously as the translator from Shishido's utility belt joined the flier in the trashcan.

"Now that that's over and done with, what should we do?" Fuji questioned.

"I think we should find other things that are guaranteed to work and take them seriously." Said Mizuki with a shrug.

"All right." Agreed the Fuji brothers.

They skipped around and went into the mall. They were able to enter the mall even without credits, because a freak accident had occurred when Fuji stepped underneath the tube, and for some reason it just short circuited. So they were frolicking around in the mall, looking for ridiculous guaranteed products.

"Guaranteed to make you look and feel ten years younger!" exclaimed a woman behind a counter.

"Hey, if you were to take that, then I suppose you would become a small child." Mizuki inferred.

"You're no different, Mizuki." Fuji glared as if their interaction constituted a glare.

"That might be fun for a little while." Yuuta admitted.

"Sorry, not for anyone younger than thirty," said the woman as she jumped out and made sure no one tripped and fell on her table.

Even though it made them feel a little dejected, they realized the potential harm that might occurred if they had had the opportunity to abuse such a product. So they walked past the woman and searched for something else that was guaranteed.

"This is GUARANTEED to make all the girls chase after you!" said a man as he held up a bottle of cologne.

Needless to say, the trio walked right by him.

And might I point out, perchance, the appearance of this group. One happened to be an elf, carrying a large bow and several arrows. Another happened to be a King, strolling around with regal robes that were probably purple, knowing Mizuki. Fuji was in a tennis outfit, carrying around an absurd tennis racket. I think it is quite obvious that this group was a little bit more than a spectacle, so people whispered as they passed.

They walked around for a little while before they suddenly came across what looked like a phone booth.

The billboard written on the top stated, "Ask One Question, Receive One Answer: GUARANTEED."

"Hey, it's guaranteed!" Yuuta pointed out. "That seems like a pretty fun thing."

"Why not?" said Fuji.

"So far we haven't had very good luck…aside from that language class that was quite remarkable." Mizuki said.

"What have we got to lose?" said Yuuta. "It's not like we have anything better to do."

"You mean...aside from looking for Akutsu?" Fuji suggested.

"Doing what?" Yuuta questioned.

"Never mind, Yuuta." Said Mizuki. "Don't worry your pretty little head about it anymore."

Yuuta frowned. "Don't call my head pretty." He said.

"I'll call your head whatever I want." Said Mizuki.

"Don't call Yuuta's head pretty." Fuji threatened Mizuki.

Mizuki wanted to think of a clever comeback but he was too afraid. And Fuji looked to Yuuta for praise, but Yuuta only shook his head in disbelief and disgust as he turned back to the phone booth.

"Let's just do this and find other fun things to do." He said, wishing he had been able to understand what was going on when it came time to choose the groups so he wouldn't have had to end up with Fuji and Mizuki.

They all squeezed into the phone booth. It was actually more spacious than it looked on the outside and they didn't have to squeeze as tightly as they imagined they would have had to.

There was an old fashion looking phone.

"Who goes first?" Yuuta asked.

"Me of course." Said Fuji and Mizuki at the same time as they reached for the receiver. Then they glared at each other as lighting bolts shot back and forth, and Yuuta felt pretty uncomfortable since he was naturally in between the two of them.

"On the other hand, why don't you go first, Yuuta?" Mizuki suggested.

"Good idea," Fuji agreed.

"Uh…okay…" Yuuta said hesitantly as he picked up the phone.

It immediately picked up on the other end.

"State your name," came a voice.

"Uh… Fuji Yuuta," Yuuta replied.

"Thank you, Fuji Yuuta. State your question, and God will be with you shortly."

"God?" Yuuta repeated.

"One moment please," said the woman.

"What?" said Yuuta frantically as elevator hold music started playing.

"What's going on, Yuuta?" Fuji asked.

"The woman said that God was going to speak with me shortly." Yuuta replied, looking a little distressed.

"It must be the name of the boss at the company." Mizuki evaluated.

Suddenly, the hold music stopped playing.

"Fuji Yuuta," Came a heavenly booming voice from over the phone. "The answer to your question is; Yes. It is I. God. Thank you for asking your question."

Then there was a dial tone.

Yuuta slowly hung up the phone and looked at his brother and his manager.

"Um…" he said slowly. "Maybe I misunderstood because this language is new to me but…"

"Let me try." Said Fuji as he picked up the phone.

"State your name," said the woman.

"Fuji Shuusuke."

The woman paused a moment. "You aren't Fuji Shuusuke."

Fuji looked at the telephone quizzically.

"Yes I am." He said definitively.

"State the name that was given to you at birth." The woman said.

Fuji turned to Mizuki and Yuuta, hoping that they would have an answer for him.

Finally, Yuuta cleared his throat and looked at the floor. Hesitantly, he gestured vaguely towards Fuji's skirt.

Fuji closed his eyes and gave a heavy sigh. "Fuji Shuuko," he said into the phone.

"Thank you, Fuji Shuuko. State your question, and God will be with you shortly."

"Will Yuuta ever live back at home with me again?" Fuji asked.

"Don't ask God a stupid question like that!" Yuuta ordered as Mizuki slapped his forehead.

"One moment please," the woman said as the hold music played.

Fuji smiled pleasantly at Yuuta as he waited.

"Why do you think I don't want to live at home with you?" Yuuta shook his head.

"Fuji Shuuko," came the booming voice of the lord. "The answer to your question is; No. Probably not. Thank you for asking your question."

Then the dial tone.

Fuji hung up the phone.

"I don't believe that that is actually God." Said Fuji finally.

"Of course it isn't!" said Mizuki. "It's probably just some guy on the other end making up answers as he goes along."

"But he knew that Shuusuke had given the wrong name," Yuuta pointed out.

"You guys didn't ask good questions." Said Mizuki. "Let me have a turn."

He picked up the phone.

"State your name."

"Mizuki Hajime." Said Kabaji. JK!!!!!! IT WAS MIZUKI!!!! LOLZ!

"Thank you, Mizuki Hajime. State your question, and God will be with you shortly."

"What is the meaning of life?" Mizuki asked, and he winked at the two Fujis.

"One moment please."

Mizuki felt pretty satisfied as he stood there and waited.

And waited some more.

They waited quite a while.

Finally, the hold music stopped and the booming voice appeared.

"OH VERY FUNNY MIZUKI HAJIME." The voice practically screamed. "YOU THINK YOU'RE HILARIOUS DON'T YOU? LIKE I'VE NEVER GOTTEN THAT QUESTION BEFORE! FOR ME'S SAKE! DON'T YOU HUMAN BEINGS SPEAK TO EACH OTHER? WHY WASTE YOUR SINGLE QUESTION ON A STUPID ONE LIKE THAT?"

Mizuki's mouth hung open.

"NOW ANSWER A REAL QUESTION BEFORE I SEND ALL TEN PLAGUES TO SMITE YOU OFF THE EARTH."

Mizuki stuttered.

"Uh…uh…"

"IS THAT ALL? UH…? THAT'S ALL YOU CAN SAY? YOU'RE TALKING TO GOD AND ALL YOU CAN DO IS WHIMPER. THAT IS SO TYPICAL. FINE, I'LL ANSWER YOUR STUPID QUESTION."

There was a bit of a pause.

"Mizuki Hajime," God's voice sounded much more pleasant. "The answer to your question is; The meaning of life is to play tennis. Thank you for asking your question."

Then there was a dial tone.

Mizuki hung up the phone, and looked at his companions.

"That WAS God." He said.


	96. Old School

Channel 96- Old School  
Sanada, Yukimura, Kirihara

Sanada, Yukimura and Kirihara were standing in the middle of an empty lot looking idle. No one was saying anything, they were only fidgeting awkwardly and avoiding eye contact.

"Are we going to get away with this?" Kirihara whispered.

"Hey, as long as they don't look at my birth date, they won't suspect a thing!" Sanada said.

"Are you serious?" said Kirihara, sounding slightly offended. "The whole point of this is that they ARE going to check your birth date!"

Before anyone could respond, a hover car suddenly descended from the heavens and the door opened up on the top like they do in the DeLorean time machine in Back to the Future. A man stepped out and handed a set of keys to Sanada.

"They're still using keys in the future?" Yukimura pondered out loud.

"All I'll need to see is some identification that are of age to rent a hover car." Said the man, looking smug.

"I have this," said Sanada as he pulled his driver's license out of his pocket. You know, the one that says that he's twenty-four.

"What's that?" the man inquired.

"My… driver's license?" Sanada suggested.

"Your what?" Nothing anyone could say would ever confuse this man more.

"What kind of identification do you want?" said Yukimura.

"I was just going to check the age of your fingerprint." Said the man as if that was completely normal and handing over a driver's license was totally weird.

"Oh." Said Sanada slowly.

The man pulled a small devise out of his pocket and opened it up to reveal a handprint. Sanada put his hand in the outline and scanned very futuristically. It made a happy beeping noise.

"Well, you check out." Said the man, looking satisfied.

"Wait, I want to try it," said Kirihara as he put his hand out.

The man looked a little puzzled at first but he wasn't about to question a young boy in a cowboy outfit. So he scanned his hand, and the little machine made a sad beeping noise.

"No, you're underage." Said the man.

"Well I knew that." Said Kirihara. "I just wanted to try it."

"Um…okay." Said the man as he slowly backed away from the group.

"All right, if driving a hover car is anything like driving a regular car, then I'll be all set." Said Sanada as he got in the driver's seat. Kirihara and Yukimura didn't have to fight over the passenger's seat. It was obvious that Kirihara was sitting in the back.

Sanada inserted the keys and looked satisfied as the engine started. Their seatbelts were automatically buckled for them as Sanada assessed the various buttons and levers he got to play with.

"Come on!" said Kirihara. "I want to be airborne!"

"I don't want to mess this up." Sanada calmed Kirihara. He spotted the gears and pulled it to the option 'H', assuming that the H stood for HOVER!

Thankfully, he was right. H did not stand for…um… some equivalent for the word DISTASTER that starts with an H!

The car slowly started to rise. Yukimura and Kirihara cheered as Sanada continued to inspect the car so he could control how high they went, and once he discovered it, he put his hands on the wheel.

"Where do you guys want to go?" he asked.

"Let's use our advantage to locate Akutsu!" said Yukimura nobly. Kirihara looked disappointed, but he wasn't about to say anything contradictory to Yukimura so he agreed.

So the second Sanada put his foot on the accelerator, the car went completely out of the control. It went up, it went down, it went all around. The trio from Rikkai Dai screamed as they careened out of control, and suddenly the roof shot off and they were rocketed out of the vehicle. Thankfully, their seats turned into parachutes and they safely landed.

Unfortunately, the car now had no driver. It continued to careen out of control right onto…

A nearby tennis court.

This distressed the Rikkai Dai team even more as they sprinted over to make sure the tennis court wasn't harmed. I mean… to make sure no PEOPLE were harmed.

When they arrived, they discovered that the car had only crashed into the cannons that fire tennis balls at the players. It had affected the fence around the court so the hoops had collapsed as well. There were a few young kids with tennis rackets in their hands standing around looking distressed. Apparently, an out of control hover car had just interrupted their game of tennis.

"Aw man!" said one kid as he kicked the ground.

"Without the cannons or the hoops, we can't play tennis!" said another.

"Cannons and hoops?" said Kirihara as he and the other two approached.

"DUH!" said one of the kids. "Don't you know how to play tennis?"

What followed was an extreme explanation of exactly how futuristic tennis was played. Sanada, Yukimura and Kirihara were shocked and appalled at first, and then they decided that they were going to teach these kids how to play REAL tennis!

The kids obviously had nothing better to do (even though our heroes DID) so they surrendered their rackets to their elders.

"Whatever you do, don't throw your rackets!" warned one of the boys as Sanada and Kirihara got on the court.

"Watch carefully," said Yukimura. "It's quite simple to play 'old school' tennis."

"I am the designated server!" said Sanada to the kids as he pointed to himself and then he pointed at Kirihara. "Kirihara is the designated receiver!" Kirihara waved. "I serve it to him, and it's his job to volley it back to me."

The boys whispered to each other confusedly.

"And then when he volleys it back to me, I'm supposed to send it back to him." Sanada explained. "Whoever misses the ball first loses the point. We'll show you."

Sanada threw the ball up in the air and served it.

Kirihara returned it.

They volleyed back and forth for a bit before Kirihara missed it.

"There, now you see the score is 15-0." Sanada said.

"Fifteen?" the boys sounded appalled.

"Is it because you made fifteen volleys?" demanded one of the kids.

"No, no," said Yukimura. "The scoring system is a little different. It goes 0, 15, 30, 40 and then the game point."

They were doing a pretty good job at confusing everyone they came across today.

"Just watch," Yukimura said.

They continued to volley back and forth for a little while, and a few more people came to watch.

But Yukimura started to get the vibe that the kids were expecting something to happen.

"Aren't there any explosions?" asked one of the furlings.

"Um…" Yukimura replied. "Well… no LITERAL explosions. I mean… there aren't any fiery deaths, if that's what you're asking about."

"No fiery deaths?" all the kids whined.

"And why aren't there any rewards?" demanded one of the children.

"Rewards?" Yukimura repeated.

"Like…the Shield of Eternity!" said the kid, and the rest of the kids cheered at the thought of the magical item. "Why don't you get a reward for winning the first round?"

Yukimura didn't really think he needed to answer. As a matter of fact, he thought the kids were just kidding around.

"This game is just BORING!" said one of the kids. "Nothing is happening!"

"Of course something is happening," said Yukimura. "Just watch."

"We HAVE been watching!" said one of the more particularly bratty ones. "And nothing is happening! They didn't even activate the Blitzs, Zone Wars or Super Rations."

"You don't need all those ridiculous things in order to play tennis." Sanada said as he and Kirihara walked over.

"Why don't you guys just play normal tennis?" asked a kid. The rest of the kids agreed.

"We DO play normal tennis." Said Kirihara. "It's you guys who play some weird screwed up version of tennis."

"I'm glad we live in a time that doesn't have this weird version of tennis." Sanada rolled his eyes.

"WE WANT AN EXPLOSION!" screamed all the kids as if they had previously rehearsed. They continued to chant at the wonderful trio as they just stood there and took it like men.

"Shut up already!" said Kirihara angrily as he threw the racket on the ground.

It hit the court and bounced to the side.

The kids gasped and looked at each other.

Then they ran away as fast as they could.

"Huh?" said Sanada, Yukimura and Kirihara as they all looked at each other.

Suddenly, they heard a small crackle. When they turned around, there was smoke rising from one spot on the court. Then, more noises like that started to occur with more patches of smoke all over the court. It was surprising for them, but not nearly as surprising as when a hatch on the court opened up and several chickens sprung up and started running around stupidly. Then, from nowhere, many men on motorcycles appeared and started tearing around the court while gremlins bounced around the court, destroying the netting and bothering anyone who happened to be there.

"What is going on?" demanded Kirihara as he dropkicked one of the gremlins.

"You threw the racket, that's Rule Number One of things not to do!" said Sanada.

They heard some distant beeping. First, the beeps were far apart, and then they got progressively closer together. The chickens and gremlins suddenly retreated back into their compartments as the men on motorcycles disappeared as abruptly as they had appeared.

Then the entire court erupted into a big explosion.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" they all yelled as they were once again thrown across the city. Except this time they didn't have parachutes.

Luckily, they landed in a pillow factory.

Unluckily, they didn't land on any pillows. They landed on the hard roof that was not soft and cushiony despite what it was making on the inside.

"Ow…" they writhed. They didn't die or mortally injure themselves, because that would just be a hassle. Especially since there's only one group left to find Akutsu…


	97. Outlets

Channel 97- Outlets  
Renji, Tezuka, Inui

"I'm willing to bet no one was clever enough to do this." said Inui with a sigh as he, Renji and Tezuka stood outside Akutsu's house.

The door opened and Akutsu was standing there.

"What the…" he looked angry. "How the hell did you find my house?"

"It was easy," said Renji. "We just asked some people and we eventually found someone who knew were you lived."

"Well I'm not coming with you guys." Said Akutsu.

"You have to or else we can never go home." Tezuka said.

"You'll get used to it," said Akutsu.

"We don't have to get used to it because we're going home." Inui said in a voice that he must have thought was threatening.

"Not with me you're not!" said Akutsu as he slammed the door shut.

Inui, Renji and Tezuka sighed at each other.

"Looks like we're going to use force." Said Tezuka. There was no tone in his voice that suggested he was disappointed about this course of action. As a matter of fact, there was no tone in his voice at all. Imagine that.

"Do I get to suck his blood?" Renji asked.

"No, Renji, let's use that as a last resort." Said Inui.

"Okay, fine." Said Renji, sounding slightly dejected.

"Are you ready, Tezuka?" Inui asked.

"Yes." Said Tezuka, holding up a small square object.

Inui unsheathed his sword and sliced a small hole above the doorknob. He turned it from the inside and then pushed the door open.

"That was very badass of you, Sadaharu," Renji commented.

"Thank you, Renji." Inui said.

"Whatever." Said Tezuka because he wanted to say something so he wouldn't be left out.

"Hey…" came a voice as Akutsu rounded the corner. "What the hell did you do to my door?"

He looked quite enraged and might have started beating things up if not for the fact that he noticed Inui had a sword in his hand. So he decided to start throwing things instead. He picked up the closest thing to him, which happened to be a vase, and chucked it at Inui.

Renji reached out and batted it aside.

"All right, put down the weapons and we'll fight like men!" commanded Akutsu.

"Very well, but I'm not much of a fighter," said Inui as he put his sword down.

Akutsu advanced towards him and just before he got there, Tezuka reached out his hand and jabbed the little box in Akutsu's side. As it turned out, this little box was no random little box that Tezuka found on the street and decided to carry around and jab at people. It was a TAZER.

Akutsu twitched violently around for a couple of seconds before Tezuka withdrew the tazer and Akutsu collapsed to the floor in a heap, moaning and groaning pathetically.

"Can I suck his blood now?" Renji asked.

"No, Renji." Said Inui.

Tezuka then pulled out a frying pan from behind his back and hit Akutsu over the head with it. Don't ask how Tezuka came across a tazer and a frying pan. He's Tezuka. He can do whatever he wants.

"Just in time, too." Said Inui as he checked the remote for the time. "We have to meet up with the others. We still have a mission to acquire and complete, and hopefully we won't need Akutsu in order to do it."

"If we don't need him, can I suck his blood?" Renji asked.

"NO." said Tezuka forcefully. "We're just going to get him back to the meeting place WITHOUT mutilating his body."

"You know…" said Inui in his 'hmmmm' voice. "I have just noticed something. The number on the remote did not descend to zero even though Akutsu is right here."

The other two leaned over to see for themselves. No one really ever trusts Inui, do they?

"Hm…it's true…" Renji said. "What could be the reason for that?"

All of a sudden, the remote ticked to a zero.

"A delayed reaction," Inui shrugged.

"All that concern for nothing." Said Tezuka as if it affected him at all.

"What the…" came a voice from the other side of the room. Everyone turned and looked at the front door. They could see movement on the other side of it because of the hole Akutsu had created.

The door slowly began to open and Akutsu stepped through it.

"Akutsu!" exclaimed our stoic buddies.

"Are you the guys who ruined my door?" Akutsu demanded.

They looked back and forth between the Akutsu standing up and the Akutsu lying down.

"I'm confused." Said Renji. He wasn't afraid to admit it.

"What have you done to Jin Two?" Akutsu gasped once he noticed himself lying on the floor.

"Jin Two?" Tezuka repeated.

"My clone!" Akutsu said. "Lots of people have them in the future!"

"Oh geez, Akutsu has a clone." Said Inui as he slapped his forehead.

"We've already taken out the clone, but we need THIS ONE in order to make the remote react." Tezuka said. "No doubt this one will be equally easy to apprehend."

"Yeah right!" said Akutsu. "My clone is a pansy. He's no where near as badass as I am."

"We'll see about that," Renji started, but Inui put up his hand to stop him.

"Renji," he said sternly.

Renji frowned. "Fine, I won't suck his blood," he said.

"Do you have a one track mind or something?" Tezuka said to Renji. "For crying out loud. Think of something else for once."

"I haven't had anything to eat since I sucked Shishido and Ootori's blood." Said Renji. "You would have a one track mind too."

Then they turned around to the sound of the door slamming and it was then they realized that Akutsu had just bolted out the door.

"So much for being badass." Said Inui.

They went to the doorway and watched Akutsu running down the street.

"You know, this would be a whole lot easier if you just let me suck his blood." Renji pointed out.

"That may be true, Renji," Inui said. "But I hardly see it as a constructive outlet for you right now."

"So?" said Renji.

"The longer we stand here, the further he gets away." Tezuka reminded them.

"No worries," said Inui, holding up one finger. "I thought ahead."

"How so?" Tezuka asked.

Inui took his shotgun from his belt and then shot it up in the air.

The other two waited for something to happen.

"Okay…" they both said.

"Now let's head in the general direction that we saw Akutsu dart off." Inui suggested as he put the smoking gun back on his belt.

Even though the others were slightly confused, they went off in the general direction where they saw Akutsu dart off. Renji suddenly stopped and bent down, touching a small red spot on the sidewalk and then standing up.

"It's blood." He evaluated.

"Yes it is." Said Inui.

Renji almost licked his finger clean, but Tezuka and Inui felt uncomfortable with that so they gave him a hanky.

"Now let's follow this trail," Inui said as he pointed out that there was a trail of blood.

"Wait, let me evaluate what you did." Tezuka said. "You shot your gun up in the air and now you've decided that this trail of blood will lead us to Akutsu."

"My gun never misses," Inui said. "I wanted it to hit Akutsu, and it did."

"So you shot Akutsu." Tezuka said.

"Right." Said Inui.

"And you wouldn't let me suck his blood?" Renji raised an eyebrow.

Inui decided that he didn't feel like answering so he didn't. They followed the trail of blood, though they didn't have to follow very far because they could have just listened to the sound of Akutsu writhing in pain while hiding in a bush.

"You shot me!" he yelled angrily as he grabbed his arm where he had been shot.

"There's no other way to get you to come with us." Inui said.

"There's no way I'm coming with you guys!" said Akutsu as he suddenly sprung up and took a wild swing at them. They all jumped back in response and Akutsu stood up straight like he could conquer the world.

"Um…" said Tezuka, Renji and Inui at the same time.

"You didn't take into account that we're in THE FUTURE." Said Akutsu. "And someone like me who gets in fights all the time has to carry around Super Band-Aids." He whipped out a small box from behind his back. "If I just apply it to the place that hurts, within only a few seconds the wound starts to heal and the pain subsides!"

"You sound like you're in a commercial." Said Inui.

"So?" said Akutsu. "These things work."

"Well, at least we found him." Said Tezuka.

"Should we use the tazer?" Inui asked.

"He'll be expecting that." Tezuka replied. "Especially since you just said it."

"But if we could find a way to distract him…" Inui frowned.

Before this conversation could continue, they suddenly heard Akutsu call out in pain. They turned around to see Renji standing behind Akutsu, sucking his blood from his neck. Akutsu yelled and writhed some more before he collapsed to the floor once Renji decided he was done.

"Renji…" said Inui, sounding more disappointed than anything else.

"I'm hungry…" Renji bowed his head in shame as he used his vampire camp to wipe his mouth.

"Well, I suppose this could work in our favor." Said Tezuka. "You'll be able to command him to come back with us now so we can meet up with the others. It's about time for that anyway."

"You need to learn how to exercise some self control, Renji." Inui crossed his arms.

"Sorry." Said Renji.

They looked off in the distance to where they were supposed to meet with everyone else, and suddenly had the realization that there was still a mission they had to complete.


	98. Reunion

Channel 98- Reunion

"Where is everyone?" Atobe demanded, tapping his foot impatiently. "They said to meet back here at the end of the day, and the end of the day is here yet no one else is! How long do they expect me to wait?"

"Usu," said Kabaji.

Sengoku only chuckled under his breath.

"I told you to stop doing that." Atobe warned Sengoku.

"What?" said Sengoku. "He's got a great sense of humor. Can't I laugh if he says something funny?"

Atobe glared at Sengoku. "No," he decided. "Not unless you want to tell me exactly what he said."

"He wasn't dissing you or anything." Sengoku raised an eyebrow.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"See?" Sengoku offered.

"All right, you know what?" said Atobe. "I have hade it up to HERE—"

Just when Atobe was about to go medieval on Sengoku's arse, he was interrupted because he sensed the presence of more of his Hyoutei teammates.

"Atobe!" came Choutarou's voice as he, Shishido and Jirou approached them. "Did you have any luck in finding Akutsu?"

"Unfortunately not," Atobe said. "And I take it you three did not as well?"

"No." Choutarou looked ultimately ashamed. Shishido looked rather preoccupied with a piece of fuzz that was stuck to his tie, and Jirou was in the middle of a yawn. "As a matter of fact, we discovered the most horrible thing ever!"

"What is that?" Atobe asked.

"They changed tennis!" Choutarou said.

"Who changed tennis?" Sengoku demanded, immediately getting to his feet in an enraged fashion.

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"This can't be." Said Atobe, putting a hand over his heart.

"It's true," said Jirou. "I played this crazy new tennis. It's really hard!"

"How horrible…" Atobe said. "I thought there might have been a chance that I would become accustomed to this world once I figured it out, but now that I know tennis has been changed, I know we must try extra hard to find Akutsu!"

"We didn't really even look for him." Shishido admitted.

"That's okay because we didn't really either." Sengoku said.

"Were you guys as lazy and unsuccessful as we were?"

They turned around to see Ryou, Atsushi and Kentarou approaching them.

"Pretty much." Sengoku said.

Shishido maneuvered himself behind other people when he saw Kentarou.

"Oh, don't worry, Shishido," said Kentarou pleasantly and completely sanely. "I have been rehabilitated."

"You called me Shishido." Shishido observed. "So you're normal again?"

"Yup," Kentarou said.

"Right, because I've been meaning to ask WHY you thought I was this 'Jane' person in the first place!" Shishido said.

"You don't have to yell, Shishido," said Choutarou. "He's not chasing after you anymore."

"Just don't even bother and hope you both forget it all together," Atsushi advised.

"I would sort of like to forget it actually…" Kentarou admitted embarrassedly.

"You're not the only one!" said Shishido. "I don't know if I'll ever recover from the emotional scarring you put me through!"

"Then you should visit the same rehabilitation center I went to!" said Kentarou. "They fixed me up perfectly in a very short amount of time and I hardly feel bad for anything I did whatsoever!"

"Well you should feel bad for kidnapping me…" Shishido crossed his arms childishly.

"Oh Shishido," said Jirou as he slapped Shishido on the back. "If EVERYONE who kidnapped you felt bad then there would be enough negative energy in the world to make it collapse on itself."

Everyone looked at Jirou and decided he needed a bitch slap. They did 'Rock paper scissors' to decide who got to do it, and when they were in the middle of the tiebreaker between Shishido and Atobe, another group arrived.

"Oh, we should have just brought those pills with us in hopes that one of THEM would wish for Akutsu to be here!" said Momo.

"Oh right!" said Kaidou and Taka as they slapped their foreheads.

"What?" said everyone else who was standing there.

"It's what we did with our day." Taka shrugged.

And then everyone happened to notice a few strange things about their comrades who had just arrived.

"Okay… Taka…what's with the pink horse?" Sengoku questioned.

"Well…um…" Taka said slowly as he held both the reins of his horse and his new pink horse. "We sort of…found her?"

"Found a pink horse?" Sengoku said.

"Uh." Said Taka. "Yeah. It's the future, after all!"

Sengoku rubbed his chin, but then he shrugged. It seemed like a good explanation for anything peculiar that might have been happening, such as Taka rounding the corner with a pink horse.

"And why are you dressed up as a ninja?" Jirou was bordering on offended. But at that exact moment, Shishido had become victorious in the competition over who got to slap Jirou, and therefore Jirou was slapped.

"Because I am the ultimate warrior!" said Momo as he struck a pose with his num-chucks. "I am the first ever NINJA-PIRATE!"

"No, we had a couple of those in our clan." Said Jirou, looking unimpressed.

"And nobody ask about the puppy if you know what's good for you." Kaidou warned everyone.

They figured that the last thing they needed was for Kaidou to have a vendetta against them so they let him have his fun and secrets from the world.

Within only a few moments, Oshitari, Gakuto and Hiyoshi arrived. After they explained that they had finished off their day with playing video games and getting nothing accomplished, they further inquired about everyone else's success or lack thereof.

"Well, I'll have you know that I beat the high score in the futuristic Dance Dance Revolution game!" Gakuto announced.

"We WOULD be proud of you, except you were obviously doing that instead of searching for Akutsu." Atobe said, rolling his eyes.

"Aww…" said Gakuto.

"Don't worry, Gakuto." Said Oshitari. "I'M proud of you."

"Really?" Gakuto beamed.

"Sure." Said Oshitari.

"And that stupid guy Buddy followed me around all day trying to one up me on every game I played." Said Hiyoshi. "It was really annoying."

"Well, you DID kill him." Oshitari pointed out.

"So?" said Hiyoshi. "It was only virtual reality killing."

"No, I mean after all that, when you ACTUALLY killed him." Oshitari said. "And then we hid the body. Remember?"

"Oh, well of course I remember that." Said Hiyoshi. "I was talking about when I virtual reality killed him."

Then they realized that everyone was staring at them.

"What?" said Oshitari. "You all would have done it too."

"It might be best to keep quiet about it though, cause you're probably wanted for murder." Momo advised.

"Hey, what's this all about?" Gakuto demanded. "Why are YOU dressed as a ninja?"

"Why are YOU?" said Momo.

"Cause I AM a ninja!" Gakuto answered.

"Well so am I!" Momo said.

They were about to start arguing, but, since everyone seems to always show up at the perfect time, another group arrived!

"No one comment about the outfit." Ryoma warned.

Ryoma was still wearing the train conductor outfit.

And so Oishi and Eiji quickly explained what happened.

"And we didn't keep track of his clothes…" Eiji said.

"And we had used up all of our credits on buying the bear suit and this outfit…" Oishi continued.

"And he has to wear SOMETHING!" Eiji finished.

"Someone kill me now." Ryoma slapped his forehead.

"I don't know, I think it's slimming." Said Momo as he slapped his knee.

"Oishi, why didn't you spend the credits on buying yourself a pair of pants or something?" Taka questioned.

"I didn't think of it at the time…" Oishi cried.

"All right, has anyone found Akutsu though?" Eiji asked.

"Obviously no one has since he is obviously not here." Said Oshitari. He paused a moment. "OBVIOUSLY."

"You don't have to be so mean!" Eiji whimpered.

"It was obvious." Said Oshitari as if he hadn't used that word six hundred times in the past five seconds.

And, since you have probably noticed the pattern so far, the next group to arrive was the lovely Fudomine team! They smelled foul because they had been swimming around in the sewers and were attacked by various sewer monsters.

"You guys smell awful." Said Atobe.

"So?" said Tachibana. His teammates applauded and thanked him for coming up with such a great come back to defend them in their time of need.

"Did you guys roll around in some garbage or something?" Ryou asked.

"No, we fell down into the sewers." Tachibana answered.

"Ew." Said Ryou. "So you rolled around in human waste."

"It's not like we WANTED to." Tachibana frowned. "It's not like we saw an open manhole and dove in just so we could swim around in the human waste."

"Yeah right." Said everyone as if his story was totally unbelievable.

Fuji, Yuuta and Mizuki were next. They reported their amazing adventures of finding guaranteed products and how they spoke with God. The others were intrigued with this idea, but then were distracted with the fact that they hadn't even attempted to locate Akutsu.

"Did ANYBODY even TRY to look for Akutsu?" said Mizuki. "I figured it would be all right if we didn't because there were nine other groups."

The other groups all looked at each other and then gave flamboyant shrugs.

"I guess we all sort of figured the same thing." Kaidou figured.

"Great." Said Fuji. "Is everyone here yet? No, Tezuka isn't here…and Inui. And…"

"The entirety of Rikkai Dai?" Yuuta suggested.

The others were taken aback by Yuuta's sudden ability to speak. Then he reminded them that he had already explained about the guaranteed products, and the rest of the group admitted to ignoring him the first time around.

So that made Yuuta sad because he knew that even though he could follow the conversations and contribute to them, people still weren't going to listen to him.

He didn't have the opportunity to angst about it for very long, however, because NEARLY the entirety of Rikkai Dai appeared. Meaning, Kirihara, Yukimura and Sanada arrived!

They ranted about the injustices that had happened to tennis. The Silver Pair and Jirou group joined them and the group of six just ranted to each other for a little while. The others would have liked to join in as well but they didn't have an first hand experience with the horridness. Instead, they just stood back and started to talk about various tennis experiences they had had that didn't necessarily involve the future or all of this Universe hopping stuff.

"And then we flew a hover car!" said Kirihara. "Actually… we did that first."

"Hopefully we jump Universes before the company we rented it from finds out that we destroyed it." Yukimura shrugged.

"What would the consequences be in that case?" pondered Sanada.

"So I take it you guys didn't search for Akutsu at all either, did you?" Atobe inferred.

"Well…" Kirihara started. "We kept our eyes peeled for him on the way over here from the tennis courts…"

The twenty-seven of them simultaneously bowed their heads in shame.

"It's a good thing we did our jobs."

They all looked up with a twinkle in their eyes as Tezuka, Inui and Renji all came walking towards them in slow motion with a cloud dust behind them like they were in the movie Armageddon. And they certainly were heroes, I'll tell you that.

After a happy reunion, they pointed at Akutsu who was just standing there like a zombie slave and tentatively stated that Renji had lost control of his vampiric urges for only a moment and had "accidentally" sucked all of the life out of him. Needless to say, everyone took a cautious step away from Renji after that.

"So now that we're all together, all we have to do is wait for our mission and complete it." Said Inui, pulling out the remote. "We can only hope that it doesn't involve Akutsu NOT being a zombie for it."

"What kind of mentally handicapped mission would involve Akutsu NOT being a zombie?" said Jirou.

"Yeah, I mean there's thirty of us." Said Sengoku. "With my great mind, we'll think of SOMETHING!"

All those who speculated that their mind was greater than Sengoku's shot him cold and bitter stare.

"Here it comes," Inui said as he leaned in to get a better look at what the remote was going to ask of them…


	99. Embrace

Channel 99- Embrace

"Embrace."

They all looked at each other.

"What kind of mission is that?" said Kaidou finally since he was apparently the first one to gain the ability to speak.

"Embrace…do you think it means we all have to hug?" Choutarou suggested.

Everyone looked at Choutarou with a face that suggested they were saying, "You WOULD suggest something like that!"

But after brainstorming, they finally came to the realization that that was exactly what they had to do.

"Okay, it won't be that bad." Momo said. "I call NOT standing anywhere near Akutsu!"

They looked at Akutsu who was drooling.

"All right, so let's just do one big group hug and get it over with." Inui said.

"Worst mission EVER…" came some mumbles as all thirty-one members of the party huddled around. After some reluctant sighs, they all wrapped their arms around each other and waited.

A few people walked by and took pictures. Some random hippies (yes, they unfortunately still exist in the future as well!) thought it was some kind of statement, so they tried to join in on the love and hugging, but they were promptly murdered by anyone they happened to come in contact.

Approximately five minutes passed before they all decided that the only thing they were accomplishing was making themselves look stupid so the hug was separated.

"Now what?" Kamio asked as Inui looked at the remote.

"It still says 'Embrace'." Inui reported.

"Maybe it wants just me and Yuuta to embrace," Fuji suggested as he grabbed Yuuta to pull him into a hug, but Yuuta pushed him away and once again announced how creepy he was.

"What are some other definitions for the word 'embrace'?" tried Oshitari.

Everyone looked at Inui who sighed.

"There are several definitions," Inui said. "The most obvious being, of course, the act of hugging. Then, of course, there is the act of adopting or accepting an idea."

"That's it," said Tezuka. "But what idea do we have to accept?"

Inui looked at the remote and then appeared confused. "The counter has turned into a 31 instead of a 0." He reported.

"WHAT?" screamed everyone.

"Don't tell me there's 31 more people we have to get." Shishido said in his threatening voice.

"Hm," said Inui. "Look at what it says now."

They all leaned over and it said, 'Number: 31. Day: 1. Universe: Pirate. Occupation: Captain. Mission: Buried Treasure.'

And, underneath all the writing, the big word WHY was written.

"That's you, Inui." Said Momo.

"What makes you say that?" said Inui.

"Cause you were there on the first day. And you were in the Pirate Universe. And you're a captain. And you did the buried treasure mission." Said Momo. "Come on, you're not supposed to let ME figure this kind of stuff out!"

"Why is it telling us that though?" Gakuto asked.

"Perhaps…" Inui rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Perhaps I must embrace something about my identity. Maybe…the meaning of the word 'WHY' might be asking… WHY was I made a pirate captain? Perhaps it has something to do with my identity."

The others looked skeptical, especially since Inui had just obviously made that up on the spot. But then they reevaluated and decided that Inui was probably THE BOMB so he would likely know what he had to do. And, since they didn't have anything to lose, they figured WHY NOT?

Inui pondered for a little while.

"Why WAS I a pirate?" he said. "Pirates are not analytical, they are not rational, they are not in any way like me at all."

"I don't know if you're thinking about it in the right way," said Renji. "Suppose one might accuse you of being a pirate because you observe other people's styles of tennis and keep track of their progress. In a way, you are pirating information."

"That is a long shot." Said Inui. "But I suppose you are correct."

He remote beeped, and he looked down to see that the remote now stated, 'Number: 30. Day: 1. Universe: Pirate. Occupation: Sailor. Mission: Buried Treasure.'

"I do believe I understand." Inui said. "Momo it is now your turn. Everyone think of probable reasons for why you appeared in the Universe you did. I evaluate we must embrace the Universe as part of ourselves before we are permitted to move on. Momo? Why do you think YOU were a pirate?"

Momo shrugged. "Cause I'm not analytical, not rational and am essentially not like you in any way at all." He suggested.

"Okay…so you're saying you're like a pirate in a literal sense," Inui said.

"Except without the pillaging and plundering part…" Momo pointed out as if that was necessary. "AND I bathe regularly. Mostly."

"Uh huh…" said everyone as the remote beeped again.

"We'll get through this is no time." Inui said. "Number 29. Day 2. Universe: Knight. Occupation: Knight. Mission: Rescue the princess."

No one said anything.

"Oh right, that's me, isn't it?" Taka said.

"OBVIOUSLY." Said everyone.

"Well… I guess it's because I'm polite and mild mannered…" Taka suggested. "Except when it comes time for a fight."

His hand moved toward his sword, but everyone dove on top of him to prevent him from going BURNING!

"Okay, good." Inui observed the remote change to, "Number: 28. Day: 3. Universe: Knight. Occupation: Squire. Mission: Rescue the princess."

"Well I don't know!" Eiji exclaimed. "I…work well with others. Um… I'm eager to learn." Inui shook his head as the remote did not change. Eiji looked depressed.

"Dig deeper than that, Eiji!" Oishi urged.

Eiji got determined. "I aspire to bring out the best in everyone!" Eiji declared.

"There we go." Inui said. "Number 27. Etcetera, etcetera. I think you're next, Atobe."

"Everyone get in the order in which you were found in," Atobe called to everyone. "That way, this will be quicker. Now let's see… why was I a detective?"

"I would have made a fine detective." Inui said.

"Well, you were a pirate." Atobe snapped. "I speculate it might be because… oh maybe… I am able to learn quickly and…"

"I think you might be digging TOO deep." Said Oshitari. "Think of it on the surface. Could anyone else have possibly been _this_—" Oshitari made a grand sweeping motion and gestured to himself and Atobe. "—Aside from you and me?"

"Good point." Said Atobe as he turned back to Inui. "I simply looked the best for the part."

"Uh…" Inui started but the remote beeped. "Okay…Number 26 is you Oshitari…"

"Ditto, with what Atobe said," Oshitari said.

The remote beeped again. Oshitari and Atobe slapped each other five.

"Moving on," said Inui. "Number: 25. Day: 5. Universe: Cowboy. Occupation: Outlaw."

"That would be me." Said Kirihara. "I was probably an outlaw because no one likes me!" Kirihara chuckled because it was meant to be a joke, but the remote beeped in satisfaction, and Inui nodded. Kirihara waited, but Inui was already moving onto the next person. "Aw…"

"Number 24." Inui said. "Universe: Superhero."

"I can't remember who you guys found first." Said Shishido.

"Occupation: Silver Boy."

Shishido glared at Inui and everyone else he felt deserved it. Which was everyone. Except Choutarou.

"I was probably a super hero because I'm badass." Shishido crossed his arms and actually looked surprised when Inui said it was not right.

"I think you're supposed to come to terms with the reasons why you were the sidekick instead of the main superhero." Jirou suggested.

"Shut up!" said Shishido as if it wasn't common knowledge that he was the sidekick. "I don't know. Cause I'm shorter."

"No." said Inui.

"A little help, Choutarou?" Shishido said.

"I don't know why, Shishido." Choutarou said, looking legitimately sad that he couldn't help.

"Maybe it's because you always need Ootori to get you out of situations that make you get all bitchy." Gakuto suggested. "Example: that time you got kicked off the regulars. And…now."

"That's not true!" said Shishido angrily.

"We would like to get home sometime this century and there are still a lot of people to go through." Sanada said.

"Fine," said Shishido as he put on the poutiest face EVER. "What Gakuto just said, except without the bitchy part."

"That'll do," Inui said as the remote beeped. "Number 23. Ootori?"

"Um…" Choutarou said nervously. "Um…do I have to answer out loud?"

"I think that's the point." Said Atobe.

"Okay…" Choutarou said. "Well…I need Shishido for moral and emotional support, and when he's not there, I don't usually do that well, so that's why a lot of my powers stopped working when he wasn't around…"

Everyone wanted to make fun of Choutarou for being so ridiculous in his assumptions, but then the remote beeped so they instead made fun of Shishido since he was blushing.

"Shut up!" Shishido ordered. "I'm having an allergic reaction to stuff, that's all!" And Shishido marched off all angrily as Choutarou stood there, still looking nervous.

"Next," Inui said. "Number 22. This could be either Oishi or Fuji."

"This was the one I was excited about!" Momo admitted.

"I think you all found me first," Fuji recalled. "I believe I was taken to the Girl Universe because I am tender and understanding and kind, just like girls usually are."

No one except Fuji was surprised when it was revealed that that was not the right answer.

"No?" said Fuji, looking confused. "It couldn't be my feminine frame, voice and haircut, could it?"

The remote beeped.

"Well, that was my second guess." Fuji shrugged.

"Oishi, your turn!" said Eiji. "You should take Fuji's first answer, because you are definitely tender and kind and understanding, not to mention the best doubles partner EVER!"

"YUUSHI is the best doubles partner ever!" Gakuto interjected, but everyone ignored him except for Oshitari who told Gakuto he appreciated his enthusiasm.

"Pssh." Said Shinji. "I'm willing to bet that if I played doubles with Tachibana, he would DEFINITELY be the best doubles partner ever."

"ANYWAY," said Inui, snapping his fingers to get attention again.

"Yeah…I guess I'll go with that answer…" Oishi said.

The remote beeped. "Okay, next is Number 20 from the Mary Sue Universe."

"That's me," said Ryoma as he stood up straight. "I believe I was taken to the Mary Sue Universe because I am more often than anyone else subjected to the terror and pain of a Mary Sue, whether she be in the form of a lover, rival or sister, or in not that rare occasions, when it is myself. For example, when it turns out that I have been a girl all these years and kept it hidden so I could play boys' tennis which is, by the way, not true."

The others applauded as the remote beeped.

"Okay, we're in the teens." Inui patted himself on the back as if he did anything recently. "Number 19 from the Soccer Universe."

"What's the occupation?" Kaidou asked.

"Um…Forward." Inui answered.

"That's you," said Kamio offered to Kaidou.

Kaidou pondered. "I don't know. It seemed pretty random." He said finally.

"That's not going to work." Inui said.

"Maybe I was put there because I focus too much on tennis." Kaidou suggested. "And they wanted me to do something else."

"Who is 'they'?" demanded Sengoku, looking appalled.

"It doesn't matter." Said Inui. "That was a sufficient answer according to the remote. Kamio, you are Number 18."

"I uh…I'm fast." Kamio said. "Which is…pretty good for soccer."

"Right." Inui shrugged.

And so they moved onto the twins who evaluated that they were probably in the OMG Universe because they're always opposing each other. They couldn't explain why it had been musical, but they assumed it was because they both had such fabulous singing voices.

Shinji and Hiyoshi brainstormed for a long time why they had been put on the Quidditch team in Harry Potter Universe, and finally they wondered if maybe it was because they were the only two without a Universe when only that Universe remained. Crazily enough, the remote was satisfied with that for an answer, which only made the pair feel a little gypped. Well, QUITE gypped.

Gakuto had a pretty easy time establishing why he was in the Ninja Universe. It was OBVIOUSLY because he was so acrobatic and flippy and energetic like a ninja. It was more difficult with Jirou, however. But he finally evaluated it was for opposite reasons as Gakuto. Jirou was simply NOT energetic enough, so he, like Kaidou, was placed into the Universe in hopes that he might change.

"Number 11?" Inui led. "Fairy Tale Universe. Occupation: King."

"Clearly I was assigned as such because…" Mizuki began. Then he did his famous little chuckle. "Well, have you looked at me recently?" He modeled himself in front of everyone and they rolled their eyes and nodded.

"Yuuta, you're next," Fuji said as the remote beeped. "Why do you think you became an elf prince with healing abilities, magic powers, a perfect arrow shot and the inability to communicate with us?"

"Um…" Yuuta pondered. "Well, I probably had all that stuff just so I could be better than you… and the inability to communicate thing was just for laughs and so that you could all just continue to pat me on the head and say, 'Oh that Yuuta'."

Surprisingly, that was enough. Tezuka and Tachibana both established that they were made apart of a band because they had to improve their teamwork skills since they were both captains of their teams and used to everyone doing exactly what they were told. Also, to get a break from tennis.

Renji sat on his vampire occupation and finally just shrugged. He didn't know why he had become a vampire anymore than the next person, and to be completely honest, he had never even questioned it. After only a few days, he had mostly gotten used to it.

"Well, Renji, you CAN be a little creepy sometimes…" Kirihara said.

Sanada and Yukimura had to agree. And Renji finally dove deep within himself to reason that it might have been because of his slightly mysterious and maybe a little creepy nature that he was assigned the role in the Vampire Universe.

When it came to be Kentarou's turn, he admitted that he didn't remember much about his adventures in the Jungle Universe, but he guessed he had been put there because of his optimistic and unpressured lifestyle. No one really knew what he meant by that but they DID know that the remote had accepted the answer so they weren't going to bother fixing something that wasn't broken.

Yukimura vacantly guessed that he was made a model because of his slightly girlish and dependent nature. In turn, Sanada evaluated that he had been made the manager because of his slightly overbearing and obsessive compulsive nature. Both answers turned out to be true.

"I was made a space cowboy—" Sengoku started.

"Space Pirate." Inui interrupted.

"Excuse me?" Sengoku said, looking annoyed.

"Number: 3." Inui read. "Day: 46. Universe: SciFi. Occupation: Space _Pirate_."

Sengoku looked around awkwardly at everyone who shook their heads in disappointment.

"What?" said Sengoku. "Can't a guy change?"

"Just answer so we can get out of here." Atobe ordered as he smacked Sengoku upside the head.

"Fine, fine…" said Sengoku. "I was probably made a space _pirate_ because I take risks and get into trouble sometimes because of them. And, of course, all the girls go crazy over the thought of me coming along and—"

"That's all right, the remote beeped." Inui said. "Kabaji is Number Two."

Kabaji paused a moment, and then said, "Usu."

Then there was another pause.

Sengoku dabbed his eyes with a hanky. "What a speech…" he said.

Everyone was about to punch him but the remote beeped again.

"Number: 1." Inui read. "Day: 50. Universe: Future. Occupation: Civilian. Mission: Embrace."

"I can't believe we've been at this for fifty days." Oshitari shook his head.

"Our parents are going to be all freaked out that we were gone for so long." Said Choutarou.

"They'll just be happy that we're back." Atsushi pointed out.

"But we still have a lot of explaining to do." Ryou sighed.

"Um…Akutsu can't really embrace or come to terms with anything while he's like this, can he?" Eiji whispered.

"Sure he can." Said Renji. "Akutsu, come to terms with something."

"I hate tennis." Said Akutsu in a scary droney voice.

Everyone winced… but not because of Akutsu's scariness. It was because of the horrible blasphemy that he had stated.

But sure enough, the remote beeped.

"It says complete…" Inui reported.

Everyone's eyes sparkled with happiness as the white light suddenly appeared. Renji sizzled up and died so he was unable to enjoy the last moments as Inui's finger hovered over the button. He finally pressed it and they all disappeared.

"_Momoshiro!_"

Momo sat up. He looked around the room and saw he was a classroom with many other students who were all staring at him and laughing slightly. The teacher was standing in front of the room looking annoyed. Momo realized that he had been sleeping in class again.

"Sorry," he said.

The teacher shook his head and continued the lesson.

Had it all just been a dream? Momo sat in his seat and wondered. So much time had gone by, but no one seemed to even notice that he had been gone. Perhaps he hadn't been gone at all. He gave a heavy sigh and tried to remember the last time he had had such a vivid dream that had seemed so incredibly real.

His eyes wandered around the room to the one person who was still staring at him. It was Kaidou.

They exchanged confused expressions, and then knowing expressions.

No, it had not been a dream.

-----

**Not satisfied? Stay tuned for the epilogue! (if you know what's good for you!)**

**PS if there are any random stats that you wanted to see (like at the end of In Which There Is No Tennis) then speak now. Things like: how many times Shishido said the word "Lame" or something to that extent. Be creative, but don't be stupid. If you are stupid then we will publically mock you in the finale chapter, and you would feel pretty sad if you came all the way to this point and just got mocked in the last chapter. Don't let the fear of being publically mocked turn you away, however. Because if you come up with something that truly makes us chuckle warmly, we will include it and praise you and give credit where credit is due. L&L**


	100. Epilogue

Chapter 100- Epilogue

Inui sat at his desk, finishing up the last sentence to the entire logging of his quest with various other tennis players. "_It has been one week since our journey, and it seems as though no time had passed at all while we were gone. Unless we were all experiencing the same peculiar dream, which has a likelihood of .006 percent, then I have no explanation as to why the events happened to us."_

Inui looked at the remote that sat across the room and frowned.

"_Needless to say," _he continued writing. "_Most people who do recall the events seem to see fit in blaming me for all the symptoms they are experiencing as a result of our trip."_

Inui adjusted his glasses.

"_Atobe, Captain of the Hyoutei Tennis Team, called me the other day and informed me of some troubles his team was having. As a matter of fact, it seems as though captains from all teams are calling me and informing me of their misfortunes, as if I could really do anything about it. Though, something tells me they are exaggerating."_

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

"Well that's just fantastic!" Atobe grumbled as he and his tennis team sat in their locker room.

"I'd hardly call this fantastic, Atobe," said Jirou, shaking his head.

"It's so like Gakuto though," Hiyoshi shrugged. "He WOULD forget that he couldn't defy gravity with ninja like skills anymore and end up misjudging his landing and fall on his face and break his nose."

"Way to just say that." Said Gakuto as he caressed his injured nose that was all misshapen and ugly.

"Can he still play?" Oshitari asked.

"Let's hope so." Said Atobe. He sighed heavily. "Well, while we're all here, we might as well talk about our experiences. Is everyone coping?"

"I strained something the other day," Choutarou admitted, rubbing his shoulder pathetically.

"No, I'm talking about repercussions as a result of that annoying fifty day Universe hopping adventure we had." Atobe said crossly.

"Well…it sort of IS from that…" Choutarou admitted, lowering his head.

"Choutarou was trying to pick something up that was too heavy but would have been no problem if he still had his super powers." Shishido said, but then his cell phone rang. He picked it up, looked at the number and groaned.

"Who is it?" Jirou asked.

"It's that annoying first year from Rokkaku!" Shishido said.

"Is he STILL calling you?" said Oshitari.

"He wants to hang out but I'm not returning his calls." Shishido grumbled. "He's left so many messages but I just delete them all."

"Maybe he's not as rehabilitated as he claimed to be." Hiyoshi said.

"What about you, Hiyoshi?" said Atobe. "Are you experiencing any horrible side effects?"

"Um…" Hiyoshi said slowly. "Well…I saw all the movies and I'm going to read the books and… um…" He looked embarrassed. "I went to a Harry Potter convention."

Everyone smacked him.

"Well, at least I'M not experiencing any horrible side effects," said Atobe.

"Aside from your colorful outfits that hurt my eyes." Jirou said.

"What?" demanded Atobe.

"I agree with Jirou this time," said Oshitari. "You have been going over board with color ever since we got back. Sometimes, your outfits don't even match."

"Don't sound so accusatory, Yuushi." Said Gakuto. "You're guilty of that too. I don't think you've worn black OR white since we got back! And you look really good in black! Granted, you look good in any color, but still."

"Gakuto, you're making me just a little uncomfortable." Oshitari admitted.

"Sorry." Said Gakuto.

"Guys, I think I want to start playing acrobatic tennis…" said Jirou thoughtfully.

"NO, Jirou." Said everyone.

"I guess Kabaji is the only one lucky enough to not be experiencing REAL side effects." Said Shishido.

Everyone looked at Kabaji to discover that he was not there. In fact, he hadn't been there the entire time!

"Huh?" they looked around for him but were unsuccessful in their search.

Just then, Kabaji entered.

"Kabaji!" Atobe said. "You were hanging around with Sengoku from Yamabuki again, weren't you?"

"Usu," said Kabaji.

"Woe is me!" said Atobe as his buried his face in his hands and ran away crying.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

"Mizuki, you're not a king anymore so you can't order us around!" said Atsushi.

"Mizuki was never a king, but he always ordered us around." Said Yanagisawa with a shrug.

"What I say goes," said Mizuki. "And I say I want to try out a new formation for our upcoming match!"

"Since I am the captain of this team, you have to be sure to run all changes in the formations by me first!" said Akazawa. You know. That guy that nobody cares about.

"Yuuta likes my idea, don't you, Yuuta?" said Mizuki.

"Um…you haven't even told us your idea yet." Yuuta pointed out.

"Oh right!" chuckled Mizuki. "But I was kind of hoping you would just nod your head in response, and maybe make some comment about your affinity to apples."

"I can speak the language and understand it just fine!" Yuuta said angrily.

"I'm so confused!" exclaimed Kaneda. You know, another one of those guys that nobody cares about.

Suddenly, a brick came flying through the window. Atsushi ran over to it and picked it up while everyone else dove for cover. The note attached to it said, "ATSUSHI, YOU'RE UGLY EVEN THOUGH I'M NOT AND WE LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME. ONLY YOU'D BE STUPID ENOUGH TO MANAGE THAT!"

"Ryou…!" said Atsushi as he shook his fist at the window. He turned around and called, "Come on, guys!"

The other members of St. Rudolph looked confused at first and thought he was talking to them. But, before they could voice their concerns to Atsushi, a bunch of random people who looked like they were part of a gang all plowed through the lockers and ran to Atsushi's side. They did some kind of crazy handshake and then ran out the door to pursue Ryou.

"Oh Atsushi!" chuckled Mizuki.

"That is NOT constructive!" said Yuuta.

"Huh?" said Yanagisawa and the two people nobody cares about.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

"All right, it's a fact that all of us have new hobbies because of this crazy Universe thing…" Tachibana said to Shinji and Kamio as they made their way to tennis practice. "But it's important that we don't make the others worry about us. After all, as far as they were concerned, we never went anywhere and it would concern them if we seemed strange to them."

"Is it really so strange to want to play TWO sports?" Kamio said.

"Well, so suddenly…" Tachibana evaluated.

"And is it strange that you want to take up a musical instrument?" Kamio put his hands on his hips.

"Not really…" Tachibana admitted.

"And is it REALLY so strange that I am now absolutely OBSESSED with Harry Potter?" Shinji said. The other two looked at him to see that he was all decked out in Harry Potter paraphernalia to the point in which if you saw him walk by, you would point and laugh. His new tennis bag was even a Harry Potter tennis bag.

"Well…that's a little strange… AND it came out of nowhere." Tachibana said truthfully.

"Oh." Said Shinji.

"Well, okay," said Tachibana. "We can all do whatever we want, but just don't make it seem sudden to the others. And, most importantly, don't let it interfere with tennis at all."

"Of course not!" screamed Shinji and Kamio.

"Then we're good." Tachibana shrugged.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

"Why do I feel so EMPTY inside?" Kirihara complained as he trudged around the Rikkai Dai locker room. Sanada, Yukimura and Renji were the only other ones present. Everyone else had stomach aches.

The other three observed Kirihara.

"I feel like I'm missing a big part of me that used to stand right here and whinny every once and a while!" Kirihara said as he pointed to the big open void next to him.

"Do you miss your horse?" Yukimura said tenderly.

Kirihara pouted and nodded.

"Aww…do you need a hug?" Yukimura asked.

Kirihara nodded again as Yukimura hugged him.

"Have you ever thought about getting a pet?" Sanada suggested.

"My horse wasn't a PET!" Kirihara said. "She was my friend. She actually LIKED me!"

"WE like you, Kirihara." Said Renji.

"By the way, how's YOUR withdrawal going, Renji?" Yukimura asked.

"Withdrawal?" Renji inquired.

"You know," said Yukimura. "You were a vampire. You sucked people's blood. You can't do that anymore because it's unnatural and against the law. How is that going?"

Renji just sat there stone faced. "Withdrawal?" he repeated.

"So you're not experiencing any withdrawal?" Sanada tried.

"No…why would I be experiencing any withdrawal?" Renji said.

The others nodded.

"Wait…" said Kirihara. "Um…are you not experiencing any withdrawal because you have strong will power… or are not experiencing any withdrawal because you're still sucking people's blood?"

Renji stared at Kirihara as if he was stupid.

"Do you even have to ask that?" Renji said.

They all chuckled. Then hesitantly cleared their throats.

"Well…you haven't answered the question yet…" Kirihara pointed out.

"I find it amusing that you don't know the answer." Renji said.

"He's not answering…" Sanada whispered to Yukimura.

"Oh come now," said Renji. "You all know me."

The chuckles became very cautious.

"He's still not answering…" Sanada whispered.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

"As we speak, Inui is dismantling the remote so we won't ever have to wonder if it'll come back to haunt us again." Said Tezuka. "So, even though it might be tempting to let your guards down, you have to continue to keep them up."

Everyone cheered.

"How's it feel to be male again, Oishi?" Eiji asked.

Oishi slapped his forehead and looked like he was JUST about to crack, but then he realized it was probably the last time he'd ever have to hear about it so he might as well be nice about it.

"It feels great, Eiji." Oishi answered.

"YAY!" Eiji exclaimed.

"I am quite relieved as well." Said Fuji.

Fuji and Oishi gave another sigh of happiness and relief. And they probably leaned back confidently and admired… themselves.

"Anyone up for a tennis match?" Ryoma asked as he stood in the doorway with his tennis racket. He had been standing like that for like twenty-five minutes and asked the question about six times whenever there was a break in the conversation.

"I sort of wish I was still a mega-awesome pirate ninja…" said Momo. "With a telescope."

"I am warning you all," Tezuka said. "If any of you let your guards down and end up letting what happened to us interfere with your tennis practices or abilities, you will be removed from the Regulars."

Everyone gulped.

"Is that comment directed towards me?" Kaidou questioned.

"Why would you say that?" said Momo. "Other than the fact that you bought a soccer ball."

"Well you're the one who bought num-chucks." Kaidou said.

"They were plastic num chucks that I got at the Halloween store!" Momo corrected.

"Come on, Momo, you weren't even in the Ninja Universe," said Eiji.

"So…tennis anyone?" Ryoma said.

"Ryoma, stop asking us if we want to play tennis." Tezuka ordered.

"Doesn't anyone want to play though?" Ryoma said.

"Of course we DO, we just don't want to play with YOU." Said Momo.

"Why?" Ryoma asked.

They all gave Ryoma THAT LOOK.

"Taka, you've been strangely quiet." Fuji noticed. "Is something wrong?"

Taka sighed. "I miss my horse." He admitted.

"Oh Taka." Said everyone.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Inui leaned away from his data book and paused a moment. He looked over at the remote that sat innocently on a bookshelf. Then he turned back to the data book and finished up.

"_As for me, once I checked to see both of my eyes were intact and still in my head, I didn't need to ask anymore questions. I rest assured knowing that the power source of the remote has been removed and such an adventure could never happen again."_

He looked satisfied and put his pen down.

His eyes once again wandered to the remote.

Then he picked up the pen again.

"_Still_," he wrote. "_I do wonder what might happen if I were to press the button again."_

With that, he put the pen down and shut the book.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.  
And now, the much anticipated stats! Sorry we can't give individual credits because there were a lot of double and triple requests. But thanks to everyone who gave us ideas for crazy stats! Some of them were annoying to find, but we did it.

Total chapters: 100  
Total pages: 423 (wowzers!)  
Total words: 200,000 (hopefully!)  
Total Universes visited: 18  
Total days spent scattered: 50  
Total tennis players collected: 31  
Total times "tennis" was mentioned: 231  
Total high fives: 10  
Total extended high fives: 1  
Total hugs: 21  
Total bitch slaps: 4  
Total Power Ranger cheers: 2  
Total raised eyebrows: 45  
Total broken necks: 9  
Total make-out scenes: 3  
Total times someone started crying: 19  
Total cracked out dream sequences: 8  
(Total parenthetical statements:) 61  
Total times "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" played: 3  
Total times the twins broke into song: 7  
Total times Momo obsessed over his telescope: 9  
Total times Mizuki looked in The Eye: 7  
Total times Renji sucked blood: 5  
Total times Kentarou called Shishido "Jane": 12  
Total times Kaidou used the word "Hence": 1  
Total times Fuji killed someone: 7  
Total times Kirihara was injured/killed: 6  
Total times people acted "gaily" (AS IN HAPPILY!): 2  
Total times Inui used his shotgun: 6  
Total times internet slang (OMG, WTF, JK) was used: 29  
Total powers Choutarou had: 22  
Total limitations on powers Choutarou had: 13  
Total times Tezuka said "Don't let your guard down": 8  
Total times two people were in SYNCHRO: 6  
Total times Taka went Burning!Mode: 4  
Total times Tachibana caused Fudomine to faint: 3  
Total times Shishido said "Lame": 14  
Total times Yuuta had an amusing expression: 8  
Total times Shishido was kidnapped: 7  
Total times Jirou said "oh my god!": 5  
Total times Ryoma was referred to as the Prince of Tennis: 2  
Total times Kamio was in the rhythm: 1  
Total times Sengoku said some form of "Lucky!": 3  
Total times Oshitari & Atobe were told they had gray skin: 7  
Total times someone just "looked sad": 4  
Total times Eiji used/referred to his butter knife: 7  
Total times Kirihara separated horses from one another: 8  
Total times Eiji pointed out Oishi's feminine state: 16  
Total times Ryoma failed at life: 31  
Total times Shishido was in denial about TEH GHEY: 19  
Total original characters with names: 31  
Total times Taka obsessed over his horse: 29  
Total times Kirihara obsessed over his horse: 17  
Total times Yuuta's Pegasus was called "gay": 13  
Total times Gakuto squealed over Oshitari: 14  
Total times someone wore a bear suit: 1  
Total times Tezuka had remote envy: 5  
Total times Kabaji said "Usu": 35  
Total times Mizuki told Yuuta an outrageous lie: 6  
Total times someone frolicked: 11  
Total tennis matches: 9  
Total times someone mentioned the patch/Inui's eye: 12  
Total times Renji sizzled up and died: 4  
Body count (excluding the exploded school): 59  
Total times sex occurred behind the scenes: 2

**Thanks for reading, everyone! And thanks especially for all the support you gave us throughout. We hope it was enjoyable and original for all of you who have read our works in the past and also to the people who are reading for the first time. What a trip; our longest one yet. And, since we can't stay quiet for TOO long, be sure to keep an eye out for something new!**

**And yes, we did try very hard to make this exactly 200,000 words. I hope it ends up working out. If not then poo. Sucks for us, now doesn't it?**


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